tbdcarl

[tbdcarl]

⋆˚⊱ the talk,

summary. dean, your boyfriend, gives you the talk.

pairing. dean winchester x reader genre. weird fluff

wordcount. 748

notes / warnings. mild language, mentions of supernatural violence, protective/jealous dean winchester, pop culture references, a tense confession scene, slight crack energy

You’re not really mad, per se. More like… Yeah, confused as hell.

Because your boyfriend just told you monsters are real—like, capital-M Monsters. Vampires, werewolves, demons, the whole horror movie roster. Except this isn’t a movie. You’re not on your couch, halfway through a sleepover marathon with a bowl of popcorn in your lap. You’re at your kitchen table, and Dean is sitting across from you looking like someone just kicked his puppy. Which is kind of hilarious considering he just confessed to stabbing a werewolf with a silver blade last week.

You haven’t said a word in maybe… five minutes.

Dean’s knee is bouncing. He keeps glancing toward the door like he’s expecting you to run for it.

“I didn’t tell you ‘cause I didn’t want you to freak out,” he mutters, voice low. “It’s not exactly first date kinda stuff, y’know?”

You blink slowly. “…You said you were a mechanic.”

He flinches. “I can fix cars.”

“Dean.”

“Alright, part-time mechanic, full-time monster-hunter. Happy?”

You lean back in your chair, arms crossed. You should be more panicked. Any reasonable person would be. But the weird thing is—you’re not. Not really. Maybe it’s because Dean doesn’t feel dangerous to you. He feels safe. Has since the night you met him in that parking lot, laughing and talking you through your flat tire like he didn’t have somewhere better to be.

You’ve seen the way he handles a wrench. The way he walks you to your door. The way he keeps a loaded gun at yours and how he sometimes feels the need to sleep with a knife under his pillow.

You should’ve figured this out.

Dean's still talking, trying to explain himself.

“I just—look, I never wanted to lie to you, but this life? It’s dark. I didn’t want to drag you into it unless I had to. But the longer we were together, the more I felt like... you should know. You deserve to know. I promise you, Y/N, I'm not cheating on you. I just have a shitty day-job.”

You stare at him a moment. Really look at him. His hands are clasped together on the table, knuckles scraped. There's a little blood on the edge of his sleeve. His jaw’s tight, shoulders hunched like he’s bracing for a slap.

You tilt your head.

“So… when you said you’d kill Damon Salvatore if he ever tried anything with me,” you say slowly, “you meant that?”

Dean’s whole face twists. “What—of course I meant it! That dude’s a vampire. He eats people, baby. I don’t care how nice his car is.”

You blink. Then blink again.

And then, god help you, you start laughing. Not a little giggle—like, full-body, stomach-aching, shoulders-shaking laughter. Dean just stares at you, caught somewhere between horrified and offended.

“I’m serious!” he says, eyebrows yanking together. “That guy’s a psycho! He compels people and drinks his weight in blood! I don’t care how many redemption arcs he’s got or what moody indie soundtrack they put under his scenes—he so much as sniffs in your direction, he’s toast.”

“Oh my god,” you wheeze, wiping your eyes. “You were jealous of a fictional vampire.”

Dean scowls. “He’s not fictional to me.”

You lean forward, resting your chin on your hand, eyes sparkling. “Okay, hunter-boy. So what is fictional to you?”

He pauses. “Uh… Harry Potter, probably.”

“That explains so much.”

Dean’s still tense, like he’s not totally convinced you aren’t about to kick him out.

You reach across the table and cover his hand with yours.

“I’m not running,” you say softly. “I’m weirded out, yeah. I mean, you basically just told me Buffy was a documentary. But I’m not scared of you, Dean.”

His shoulders drop about two inches. “Yeah?”

You nod. “You’re still the guy who brings me diner pie and gets pissy when I leave the window cracked at night.”

“That’s because it’s not safe,” he mutters.

“Uh-huh. You know I’m just gonna make more vampire jokes now, right?”

Dean groans. “Great. I’ve created a monster.”

You grin, leaning across the table to kiss him—quick and sweet, your fingers curling around his wrist.

He kisses you back like he’s exhaling for the first time in days.

When you pull away, you squint at him.

“…You still haven’t explained why you carry holy water in your jacket pocket.”

“Emergency exorcisms,” he says, deadpan.

You nod slowly. “Cool. Cool. Totally normal boyfriend things.”

Dean smiles, wide and shameless. “Welcome to the family business, sweetheart.”

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[tbdcarl]

fanfic writing culture isn’t “oh dang! I wanted to write about this prompt with this character but someone else already wrote it, so now I can’t”.

fanfic writing culture is always “two cakes is better than one. the more the merrier. there can ever be enough fics of this character with this prompt!”

[tbdcarl]

this genuinely has me in tears

[tbdcarl]

it was just us

[tbdcarl]

YELLOWJACKETS 1.10 // 3.03 // 3.04

[tbdcarl]

one of the best decisions yellowjackets has ever made is reverting the women back into girls at their most vulnerable moments. shauna when she kills adam, nat laying her head in lottie's lap, misty seeing young natalie in the mirror, misty in the morgue seeing lottie because this truly hammers home that their lives stopped the moment that plane went down and that no matter how much time has passed by, they're still those teenage girls who were on their way to their football game and lost 19 months of their lives trying to survive.

[tbdcarl]

can u imagine if other pieces of media were as scared of calling their monsters what they are as zombie media is about calling zombies zombies

[tbdcarl]

and im lterally supposed to sit here and believe that taissa fuckigng turner the bitch who paid for natalies fucking rehab every time and was natalies call when she was in a jail cell did not say One Fucking Thing at natalies funeral and let it be the joke it was? I dont think

[tbdcarl]

shoutout to whoever stole my amazon package containing nothing but a single pair of shoelaces.

[tbdcarl]

[tbdcarl]

May Natalie Scatorccio’s suffering be transferred to me I am willing to take it all for my baby girl

[tbdcarl]

Families used to eat dinner together, no phones, no iPads, just honest face to face conversations around the fireplace

You don’t see that anymore. Because of woke

[tbdcarl]

new yellowjackets fans are hating on my girl laura lee and it's pissing me off

[tbdcarl]

HER LITTLE PONYTAIL?????? oh i’ve lost it

[tbdcarl]

What a wonderful piece of media! Surely the fandom will be literate and normal

[tbdcarl]

quick list of people I'll write for!!

YELLOWJACKETS:

Natalie Scatorccio

Van Palmer

Mari Ibarra

Misty Quigley

Lottie Matthews

Jackie Taylor

Laura Lee

Shauna Shipman

Taissa Turner

Basically any yellowjacket ok

THE WALKING DEAD:

Carl Grimes

Enid (wish she had a canon last name)

Beth Greene

Maggie Greene

Glenn Rhee

Michonne Hawthorne

Rosita Espinosa

Tara Chambler

Laura

Absolutely none of the dilfs. Negan, Daryl, Rick, etc etc. ALSO NO RON I HATE RON

LIFE IS STRANGE:

Chloe Price

Max Caulfield

Kate Marsh

HOUSE MD:

Remy Hadley (aka Thirteen)

Robert Chase

Allison Cameron

James Wilson

THE OFFICE:

Gabe Lewis

Erin Hannon

Jim Halpert

Pam Beesly

THE HUNGER GAMES:

Katniss Everdeen

Peeta Mellark

Finnick Odair

Johanna Mason

Lucy Gray Baird

Effie Trinket

GAME OF THRONES:

Daenerys Targaryen

Margaery Tyrell

Sansa Stark

HARRY POTTER:

Hermione Granger

HEATHERS:

Veronica Sawyer

Jason Dean

Heather Chandler

Heather Duke

PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN:

Will Turner

Elizabeth Swann

Carina Barbossa

MARVEL:

Peter Parker

Natasha Romanoff

Wanda Maximoff

BROOKLYN 99:

Rosa Diaz

Amy Santiago

Jake Peralta

and that's all I can think of at the moment

[tbdcarl]