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ranking the best things I have heard surgeons say mid-surgery:

1. "Five second rule!" while scrubbed, after dropping a sterile scalpel on the floor (no they did NOT pick it up again but I swear everyone's buttholes puckered)

2. (spoken during the closing of a particularly long and difficult case) "Nurse - my tunes." :heavy metal starts blasting:

3. Gently to a fretful patient, pre-anaesthesia: "It's going to be okay. I promise, I've dealt with worse." As soon as the patient is unconscious: "This is literally the worst thing I've ever seen."

4. [okay this one was a med student] "Wowwww, that's so gross!!" Reg: "Please remember that [patient] is awake for this procedure." Student to patient: "Oh my god. I am so sorry, that was really unprofessional - " Patient, cheerfully, also engrossed with what's happening inside them on the screen: "Nah - it's, like, super gross, right?"

5. [another procedure where the patient couldn't be put under GA] Patient: *starts singing country roads midway through the procedure* Surgeon: *shrugs and joins in with surprisingly good harmony*

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i can’t wait for when chatGPT and ai image generation also crashes and each prompt cost $50 an attempt. oh you can’t get your stolen big tiddy anime ghibli art for free anymore? you want to buy real big boy art from real artists now? beg for it. beg for it like a dog.

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*Friends' theme song starts playing*

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“Babel” by Cildo Meireles (2001)

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now say it with me: authors/artists dont owe you moral purity. an author/artist job is not to hold you by the hand & tell you exactly what is Good™ & what is Bad™. you should be able to think for yourself

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when you’re a 14 month old french infant in a military hospital in the late 18th century and that weird hungry guy comes into your room

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[very clearly enamored AND elated] He fucking bit me.

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Pots and Pans by Anthony Brault

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logically I Know it's an irrational thought to have but it still irritates me to no end when stuff that's super popular gets the exact intended emotional reaction out of me

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Me: Did you know that medieval cathedrals weren't actually supposed to be dark and rundown places with only stained glass as color? They were bright places full of light... the reason they look like that now is because of the centuries of accumulated grime and dust, here look at this restoration of the Cathedral of Chartres in France:

It's based on actual paint from the times, and when you think about it, it makes a lot more sense, after all a church is supposed to be a bright place of hope. Yet when we think about the middle ages we think about grimy and dark cathedrals. I wonder how much of our conception of history is shaped by our current visions of historical buildings.

My Goth GF: listen, I don't think this thing between us is working,

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Joy Sullivan, from “At the Airport”, Instructions for Traveling West

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The biggest compliment ever is when someone sees your creative work and says that they’re now inspired to go out and create something, too

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as i grow older and age in fandom especially, i have waning patience for 2012 style fandom wars. i don't have time for the type of person who goes "why is this the 2nd top ship on ao3 when it bugs me", i don't have the energy to be friends with people who go "i specifically expressed dislike for this ship and people still write it?" and i have absolutely no time for someone who goes "this very personal trauma i have projected onto this random character and ship should be recognized and agreed by everyone else, otherwise they're bad people"

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There's a subsection of people on Tumblr who seem to be unaware of the concept that it is - or should be - possible to deduce what other things someone might already know, based on what you've verified that they do know. A good rule of thumb is that if they demonstrate that they are aware of some more advanced piece of knowledge, it is safe to assume that they already know the more basic info that you also know and believe to be relevant to the conversation.

Complex knowledge is built on top of simple knowledge. A person who mentions that they've been learning how to ride backwards on a horse probably already knows that you can also ride a horse while facing the same direction as the horse. You do not need to tell them this. A person who seems to be familiar with foraging edible mushrooms probably already knows that there are unsafe and inedible mushrooms. You do not need to tell them this.

Assuming that a person who seems familiar with more advanced knowledge would not be aware of the basics of this field is like assuming that someone who is in the fourth floor of a building has not been to the second floor yet. People will assume that either you are stupid, or that you're assuming they are stupid. People don't like either option, and therefore will not like you.

If it's within your power to stop doing this, by all means you should stop doing this.

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If tumblr goes down goodbye forever y'all are not seeing my ass again