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The writing is bad bc English isn’t my native language but I wanted to try out something

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^ the code

i can't tell if im mandela effecting myself into thinking that there's a panel of the mythical troll slurry with multiple colors or not. because im like half convinced troll genes are that default green

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thinking about character specific speech bubbles

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guy who wins at poker not by being stoic but by bursting into tears every time he looks at his cards, just full hysterical breakdown every round and you gotta peer through the void of theatre kid problems to figure it out

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doomed by the narrative but not to death. doomed to survive. doomed to stay alive inside the story. doomed to never escape the narrative, not even through death. you are allowed no exit. there is no way out for you and there never was. you couldn’t die if you wanted to. the narrative has a hold on you and it won’t let go. death is too sweet a doom for you. the story has something much worse in mind. there is no way out.

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NEVER get into anything thats heavy on color symbolism bro . for months you will not be able to look at the color blue without instantly thinking of Squingle Dinglus

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How do we feel about Owen Wilson as an Alpha Dave comparison?

@relaxxattack i dont wanna derail ur post lol, but it's dave's ties with capitalism in general. one of the first things he gets up to is wrecking the stock market on his planet and transferring part of his hoard to his pal tz, who's also trying to win at capitalism/fascism. dave talks about the economy and obama in sbahj despite not really understanding anything about that, BUT obama's shtick in the comic/epilogues are framed as hope fueled. by freeing him from his dead end life (job) to do what he was reaaaaally meant to do (win at capitalism again??).

dave keeps getting duped by the system despite vaguely understanding that something's not right here. he wants it to work in a hopeful way, but it keeps throwing him chest first into swords. he'll wreck the environment, make fun of the system itself for its absurdity and pointlessness in the face of armageddon, but does that ever stop him from participating? not really. even if he's being coerced into it, it's not like he'd stop himself from kicking down a few sand castles on the way out of apathy lol.

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rayne what’s homestuck about?

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Troll 48 sign zodiac is actually the names of all of the jobs you could maybe have (threshecutioner, subjuggulator, etc.) which is (the justification for) why every troll job is like 50 jobs rolled into one. Allegedly if you triangulate your hatch time and location and exact blood shade you can figure out your perfect career but no one believes in that shit so people just pick their careers lol. The Condesce thinks it's fucking hilarious to arbitrarily restrict the number of employment pathways based on an old lie she told once about her Mom, but Dualscar definitely had his chart done like 30 times and it kept coming back "Bucketboy" until he gave up.

okay so i don't want to particularly call out these kinds of headcanons as bad. but they highlight a specific fandom trend ive seen for ages so here goes:

the extended zodiac is not alternian canon, nor zodiac.

i know that's brash for a lighthearted official personality quiz. but i've seen this zodiac presented frequently as the End All of trollsigns -- even claims that all trolls MUST derive from these 288. this is a complete misrepresentation of original canon.

first, obviously, the notion that your personality is determined by your caste is literally just what troll racism is, so the canocity of this test claims racism as truth. second of all, the traits are not even accurate to the trolls we DO see in canon- they're pulled from western zodiac.

the zodiac's also determined by lunar sway; nonsense because alternian trolls don't have lunar sway. it's a "moon a sburb player dreams on", and none of these trolls are sburb players. (i also feel like this should go for aspects, though that is a more controversial opinion)

so yeah, the extended zodiac is inaccurate and purely just fandom sburb personality-type nonsense. but does that really make it noncanon? plenty of stuff on alternia is nonsense.

except... homestuck trolls don't believe that signs are a zodiac that determine their personality.

not only is the idea of signs being related to some sort of personality zodiac never once mentioned by a troll, but the signs are frequently tied to other things that have nothing to do with personality. kanaya equivalents trollsigns to signatures, and later vriska explains the concept to john as being similar to a family crest, bemoaning that trolls have to do much more searching for clues or their ancestry than humans do. cronus also refers to his sign as his signature.

virska does use the phrasing that trolls who have the same sign "have a lot in common", but she also does this explicitly in the context of explaining to john how troll ancestry works, as hussie further notes in the commentary of that page that signs are included in physical/genetic characteristics trolls look to for ancestry clues. even hiveswap, which wants you to believe in the zodiac, concludes that signs are specific to troll surnames and that there are signs outside of it. multiple trolls in homestuck have signs that do not appear in the extended zodiac.

the extended zodiac quiz ≠ the alternian sign alphabet.

alternians wouldn't know what aspects or lunar sways are, nor have personalities equivilant to their signs (feferi and meenah are right there). deciding that trollsigns = personality test is a purely human concept that comes from our western zodiac.

but you know what alternians DO have?

THEY HAD THEIR OWN FUCKING CONSTELLATIONS AND ZODIAC. FROM THEIR OWN CREATORS. THIS WHOLE TIME.

where are the headcanons about troll's placements on THAT zodiac?

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hal’s meticulously planning regularly scheduled stair tumbles to balance out her “narrative karma” and everyone is like what the FUCK are you talking about

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Homestuck characters in my style ✍️✨

I made this for IG but I think the people of tumblr might like this one too :) Plus it’s still 413 somewhere meaning there’s still time to celebrate~ 🎂✨

(warning for flashing images)

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absolutely devastated to find this with reblogs turned off. I need it for my 413 celebration.

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all right I guess tumblr ate this post because it can’t handle the truth or something, so here it is again

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