thankyoutelevision

[thankyoutelevision]

same person decided that me being in the bathroom sobbing violently and having a breakdown (which they knew) was the best time to get onto me for something i said several hours ago (after we had already discussed it earlier)

i hate when people vent/traumadump to me and when i try to reassure them or give advice or anything they just find another reason not to listen. like what the fuck do you want from me

[thankyoutelevision]

i hate when people vent/traumadump to me and when i try to reassure them or give advice or anything they just find another reason not to listen. like what the fuck do you want from me

[thankyoutelevision]

Hooked up with a British guy once and he said "awh that's propah" while I ate his ass

[thankyoutelevision]

Like one of my favorite tweets ever

[thankyoutelevision]

you can pry starting sentences with 'and' or 'but' out of my cold, dead hands

[thankyoutelevision]

I TRIED TO EDIT BOULEVARD OF BROKEN DREAMS AND I FUCKED UP

DO YOU THINK ANYONE WILL NOTICE THAT THE VOCALS ARE NOT AS THEY SHOULD BE

[thankyoutelevision]

so. my wife came downstairs just as i took a bite out of the remaining half red onion on the counter. literally within seconds of just getting away with it. i looked at her, and she looked at me, and we both sat there a moment, all frozen, before she said babs, what the fuck. i tried to say i can explain but it came out as or corn explorn because such was the onion in my mouth that there was no room for words. its honestly a miracle that she understood me at all. at least, i'm assuming that she understood me because she did let me get my bearings for a few moments. a smarter man would've used that time to think up a good lie, but instead i just chewed as fast as i could because i knew i was gonna have to tell a whopper and i really wanted to be able to use big words again.

big words are instrumental to telling a whopper.

anyway, i totally ran out of time. i barely got my first swallow of onion in before she said well?, and i did at least have an empty mouth to match my empty head. but also i had no lies. so i looked her dead in the face, opened my mouth and waited, every bit as curious as her, to hear what excuse my mouth was gonna come up with.

im pregnant, said my mouth.

great job, mouth, said my brain.

mmmmm onion, said my mouth.

better you than me, said my wife.

then she went upstairs. it has been two hours she still refuses to kiss me. im devastated. im shook. im crying a little, i think.

(but that might just be the onion.)

[thankyoutelevision]

i did noting but play cult of the lamb all weekend rahhh

[thankyoutelevision]

web design class assignment to make a bad webpage

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he saw his reflection for the first time

[thankyoutelevision]

reblog if you have skilled writer friends and you're damn proud of them

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[thankyoutelevision]

[thankyoutelevision]

Sakuya iyazoi

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ginger car

hey bbg

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hey im back maybe idk i probably am still going to be quiet

[thankyoutelevision]

its tumblin time

tumblr

What if it was tumblr time and I tumblr’d all over the place