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Because of you now any time I strike anything out I'm always thinking about the fucking Roy family and making sure it doesn't look like I'm underlining it
I've never seen this show it's destroyed my life
this is amazing for me i'm so happy to have contributed to your life in this way
#the roy family haunts my every thought#watched a movie with my girlfriend today and referenced succession three times#im-tempted#friend tag#noah answers#succession
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highly recommend developing a personal relationship to numbers bc then ur whole world becomes slightly more full of delight. there's numbers everywhere. u check ur email and ur like oh look it's 24, like from my imagination
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sometimes the tragedy of distance is very simple. i want to get groceries with you
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It's my 6 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳
guys what. what do i do with this. oh my god.
#you make an amazing point#well this is it guys i have to delete my account now o7#slash joke#friend tag#im-tempted
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It's my 6 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳
guys what. what do i do with this. oh my god.
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it's so interesting being a tumblr account that was mildly popular in fandom spaces and then just not making anymore fandom content. because now i just have random followers who see my posts talking about my life. i dont post anything for the masses, this blog is purely for me and my own needs.
#shoutout to my random followers though you guys are cool#almost all of my new followers are bots but sometimes it's a real person and i'm always amazed
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my interest in tragedies is greatly at odds with my intense paranoia
#it is so late i want to go to sleep#but also i just spent an hour researching basketball players who passed away during their career#because i was randomly interested#and now my brain thinks if i go to sleep i will die
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unnecessarily going into detail about my gender and being trans
when i first realized i was trans, it was very binary. i realized i wasn't a girl and i wanted to be a boy. i used only he/him pronouns, any perception of me as female made me uncomfortable, and i was undeniably a boy. but the more i transitioned to a man, the more i realized i wasn't just a man. i started being more free with my pronouns and with my expression, i started transitioning to be happy rather than the meet the end goal of being a man. i've gotten to a point where i confidently think that even if i was born a boy, i would still be transgender. it is embedded so deeply in my soul. i will make my gender more trans until the day i die. everything i do in my life is just in the pursuit of being as transgender as possible.
every day i am getting more and more transgender
#am i a man? yes and also no. you will never get to know#nonbinary but in a way where transgender is my gender identity to a degree
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every day i am getting more and more transgender
#having really bad dysphoria lately but it's only accompanied by me getting more transgender#i am going to be the most transgender person you've ever seen#nobody will be able to stop me from transing my gender
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getting ditched by your friends and in turn making the girl you bully/stalk sit with you on her break
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transtape i miss you ... transtape i am so poor ...
#transitioning i hate you why are you so expensive#transitioning i love you and you bring me so much joy <3
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trying to take care of my hair for the first time in my life really and it is so difficult. i've always had curly hair, but i've also never ever tried to style it or pay attention to what products i use. when i was younger, my curls always made me feel more feminine and more like a girl. i liked them and i thought they made me look pretty, but i didn't like the way that everybody else saw them. but now my hair is short, i am more secure in my presentation as a man, and my hair is not as healthy as it should be. so i am starting a journey to style my hair and allow my curls to be healthy, but being an adult and learning how to style your hair for the first time ever feels so embarrassing and confusing.
#i'm getting over the speed bumps right now#first few days have been. eh. but i'm getting good product tomorrow that will hopefully help#i love my hair and i love my curls#and i think taking care of them will be nice#or it will make me hyper dysphoric and i'll buzz my head or something who knows
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very crazy i just got randomly hit with the idea that i don't have to stay depressed and i can just. try to get better. i spent months just wallowing in my sadness and refusing to be happy, letting my depression take over, but i randomly have the motivation to get out of bed and be happy.
#i am terrified that this is fake or temporary#or mania. i don't think it is! but it is an option#but i'm in a good place right now :)#my brain just reset and realized i could be happy again which is sick as hell
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being depressed in the summer is so lame because at least when you're depressed in the winter, everybody gets it. everybody else is also a bit sad, a bit slower, a bit more tired. but in the summer, everybody else is doing great, they're savoring life, they're finding joy and love. and i'm just sitting to the side, even more depressed than i was at the end of last year.
#i hate summer so much#i have many gripes with the season#but also i'm just wildly depressed regardless of it being summer
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