the-guild-codex-and-other-things

[the-guild-codex-and-other-things]

[the-guild-codex-and-other-things]

Lienna: Do you want to get dinner?

Kit: Well, I was just going to eat cheeseballs straight out of the container praying they'd make up for the emotional pain of my broken TV, but if you insist.

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Kai: You know that thing that parents are always talking about where you keep calling your kid their siblings' names when you're yelling at them? Why isn't there a friend version of that? I called Ezra both Tori and Aaron yesterday when he was trying to make toast.

Darius: If it's any comfort, there's not a version of that for guildeds, either.

Darius: . . . Toast?

Kai: You'd be surprised how much damage it's done.

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Aaron: I hate Kai.

Tori: Really? Because I have 15 pictures of you both asleep on the couch together.

Aaron: No, you don't.

Tori: Look, there's even one with your head on his shoulder. I took it just a few seconds before he woke up and zapped you for it.

[the-guild-codex-and-other-things]

The Naturals Incorrect Quotes Generator

Cassie: :) Lia: >:( Cassie: Turn that frown upside down! Lia: ):< Cassie: Not sure what I was expecting... _____

Michael: I'm naturally funny because my life is a joke. _____

Sloane: It's not like I try to blow things up, exactly. It just sort of happens. You've got to admit though, fire is fascinating. _____

Dean: No, this is not a mess. You know what I consider a mess? Lia: Your life? Dean: I- well yes, but- _____

Cassie: You know what I learned from my friendship with Lia? Michael: There’s no such thing as too mean? Dean: Never let your friends know for sure if you like them? Sloane: Always hold a grudge? _____

Cassie: Am I right, Lia? Lia: I’m almost certain you’re not, but to be fair, I wasn’t listening. _____

Michael: They don’t make them like me no more. I’m the last of my kind. Dean: Thank God.

_____

Michael: Team A will consist of myself, Cassie, Lia, and Sloane. Michael: Team B will consist of Dean.

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Incorrect Quotes Generator #Use Your Imagination

Kit: I love the term 'partners'. Are we dating? Are we robbing a bank? Are we the dedicated detectives who investigate these vicious felonies and are members of an elite squad known as the special victims unit? Who knows. _____ Aaron: Hello friends! The Squad: Aaron: You might be wondering why I’m taped to the ceiling. _____

Aaron: Sleep is the body’s best safety mechanism. Tori: How so? Aaron: It keeps you from screwing up for 8 hours. _____

Lienna: I was voted “friendliest classmate” in high school. Aaron: I was voted “most likely to become a clown”… Saber: You think that’s bad? HA! I was voted “most likely to get rabies”! _____

*Aaron in an MPD interrogation room* Aaron: I don’t remember that. Kit: Do you remember that night last week when you slept in a revolving door? Aaron: ...No. Kit: Okay, do you remember when you were chased by those wild dogs for two miles? Aaron: Not especially, no. Kit: It was in between those two things.

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Kit: Okay, time to get started on work. *five minutes of setup later* Kit: Okay, time for an hour long break of whatever I can think of.

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Aaron: Does anyone know how to render?

Saber: I can render my enemies immobile.

Aaron: So, I actually meant 3D computer rendering but I will keep you in mind for future reference.

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Ezra, about a pigeon on his desk: Aaron, look! Eugene is my pet now!

Kai: Don't be ridiculous, Ezra. Eugene is a terrible name.

Aaron: Yeah, Aaron Jr. is better.

Kai: No.

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Robin: I haven't slept in days.

Amalia: Why? What happened?

Robin: I found this book series-

Amalia: You're kidding me.

Robin: And it wasn't quite good but it had a lot of questions and I needed answers so I figured I would just get the answers-

Amalia: Give me the short version.

Robin: Basically. Satan is the father, and the dog successfully collapsed the Syrian government.

Amalia: Give me the long version.

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Spoilers for Spellbound 7 or 8?

Tori, standing next to Kai after not having seen him for a while: I don't remember you being that tall.

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Aaron, telling the guild about Saber's love life: She's been seeing him for months. I'm telling you, I think it's the L word.

Kai, sarcastically: Leather?

Saber, on the phone about ten feet away: Hello, Zak. I just wanted to tell you something. I don't ever want to see your ugly face again unless it has an ax in it!

Aaron: Love is so beautiful.

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Vincent, showing up at his desk and finding it empty except for a piece of paper: What now?

Vincent, reading: My cousin Vinny, in the name of the holidays, I have hidden your computer. To get it back, you must find twelve eggs, half of which are in the captain's office. Godspeed. - Kit

Vincent: I hate my entire life.

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Aaron: Well, if you don't like my driving, then why don't you drive?

Ezra: I think it's illegal to drive under the influence of blindness.

Aaron: What are you, a lawyer?

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Tori: What do you mean, "What did they look like?" They looked like killers!

Kit: Yeah! They were mean-looking and they had noses and they had dark suits!

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Warped 1

Lienna: I have made the decision to trust you.

Kit, in his head: A horrible decision, really.

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Incorrect Quotes #I don't know, nobody knows

Tori: Hey, Zak, where are you going? Zak: Well, it depends. When I die, probably hell. Zak: But right now I’m going to McDonald’s. _____

Aaron: Dude, I will never forgive Craigslist for banning me after I wrote a post seeking a sworn nemesis. Whoever reported that is obviously my nemesis but I was so pissed. _____

Robin, shakily: Please, just tell me what the book is about. The plot, please. Amalia, reading an annotation on the cover of a book, unfazed: A subversive masterpiece. A deep and touching story. New York Times Bestseller. Amalia, now looking directly at Robin: Go fuck yourself. _____

Robin: I hate to disagree with you, but- Zylas: Please, you love to disagree with me. Its your favorite thing to do. _____ Ezra: I’ve been sleeping so little the past few nights that when I go to the alarm app, I click on the “power nap” button. I don’t set up alarms, I set up timers, Aaron. _____

Aaron: So, Ezra and Kai. Aaron: According to this, you two are being accused of: Armed Robbery, Vandalism, Drug Abuse, Grand Theft Auto… Ezra: We had a bad day. Aaron: And… MURDER?! Kai: It was a pretty bad day… _____

Amalia: Maybe the true treasure was friendship all along. But I hope not, because I can’t spend friendship on new clothes. _____

Kit: *spins around in chair ominously* I’ve been expecting y- *chair continues to spin* shit *tries to stop spinning* shit *tries to grab a table to stop spinning* sHIT *falls out of chair* _____

Kit, on the phone: Oh, hey, man! Sorry for accusing you of murder last week. _____

Saber: Could you be anymore annoying? Kit: Yes. _____

Aaron: I’m 80% awesome 20% water and 100% handsome. Zak: That’s 200%. Aaron: I’m twice the man you’ll ever be.