the-illegal-wizard-council - Tumblr blog

[the-illegal-wizard-council]

[the-illegal-wizard-council]

penis tips and tricks

[the-illegal-wizard-council]

but yeah , if we're being real i have powers .

[the-illegal-wizard-council]

Oh cool ass crime council I need your help with evil magics. I want to return this mattress I bought but don't have the receipt anymore, and all my attempts to fabricate one end up just giving me the recipe for a mattress

just do what we all do: teleport yourself to the store, put it where you found it and run away fast enough for the golems not to catch you

[the-illegal-wizard-council]

hi we are the illegal wizard council. we cast illegal spells

my dudes pls tell me what in the fuck wizard tumblr is

is it like the witchcraft community?

is it a space for DnD wizard rp mains?

is it an alterhuman community?

pls i need to know im so intrigued 😭

[the-illegal-wizard-council]

i dont “have ptsd” that’s all just the wizard’s curse

[the-illegal-wizard-council]

[the-illegal-wizard-council]

killing rom the vacuous spider and realizing that you still gotta fight more elder gods in order to end the nightmare

[the-illegal-wizard-council]

I know I said I'd release this on the 30th, but I decided instead to release it now haha.

That being said...

The official discord server for the Blue Moon Ball is now live!

Come join the discord and get to know your fellow wizards, witches and other magical friends who are attending the ball!

Also get updates from me about the event before they're posted to tumblr (probably by like a few minutes but it makes for a good selling point), and see sneak peeks of what I'm planning! (Like art n stuff)

Come join if you want! Link is below~☆

[If the link breaks please let me know! I set it to never expire so it shouldn't do that]

♧

Pinglist [Set A]

@scuttling-comfuddlement @the-gnomest-bastard @kobold-sanctuary-buss-island @satyrs-apothecary @irving-the-pirate-wizard @morbingtime @justagingerwithredhair @chaos-familiar @these-detestable-hands @regina-the-sorceress @combustion-witch @yourlocalbreadenthusiast @selldemapplez @agentldiddy @fractalkitty @wizard-island-trading-co @good-wizard @the-illegal-wizard-council @ash-the-tiefling @mysticminion @blobbiedaykeeppcaway @life-is-okay-rn2 @skyethebisexualwolfwizard @thequeerwizardcouncil @dread-the-eldritch-wizard @profeshinul-wizurd @a-squirrel-wizard @the-mighty-dalob @amateur-wizard @chaos-wizard-nyehehe @bertskullhaver @transgender-wizard @flowers-the-sun-witch @thebookshelflord @ceeceelemons @the-silliest-sorcerer @wizard-ghost @a-goose-in-a-trenchcoat @flirtyambiguouswizard @paltering-peculiarity @parkyrtheelvishbard

[the-illegal-wizard-council]

If you're in the need for some kind of magical artifact of magic for your setting, consider Fresnel Lenses which are used in lighthouses:

These things are Alive.

[the-illegal-wizard-council]

Real observations since I started wearing a wizard hat daily:

- Brim is so wide that I stay BONE DRY taking walks in the rain

- Brim can be positioned to block the sun from ever getting in my eyes AND keeping it off the back of my neck

- The pointed top part creates an air pocket, keeping my head from getting hot or squishing my hair as it might in a ball cap

- Hat can easily be pulled down over the tips of my ears without looking dumb, protecting them from wind chill

- Strangers say they like my hat, giving me the chance to tell them that I am a wizard

- When you’re wearing a wizard hat, ALL OTHER FASHION CHOICES become secondary, allowing you to branch out with style

Embrace ego death. Stay protected from all elements. Wear a wizard hat.

[the-illegal-wizard-council]

[the-illegal-wizard-council]

You may sometimes hear a little voice that tells you that you don’t need to use that much butter but I am here to tell you that that voice is the grim specter of the late Dr Kellogg and you should banish that demon immediately with even more butter. This is my solemn magical advice.

[the-illegal-wizard-council]

"the 'power of love' trope is such an overused and cliche gimmick" i do not care i will love it always and forever. love prevails and explodes the enemy

[the-illegal-wizard-council]

I’m not sure that I should, actually.

[the-illegal-wizard-council]

I am burdened with homosexual desire for wizards in giant hats

[the-illegal-wizard-council]

these guys show up to the feast, drink your mulled wine, slap your squire's ass and call your liege a knave, wyd ?