the-jnadf-man

[the-jnadf-man]

happy pride

[the-jnadf-man]

Fairy Tales are a necessity because they dare speak the truths that the world never wants to hear;

That adults are cruel to children.

That you will suffer injustice, but that doesn't give you the right to be unjust to others.

That there are negative consequences to indulging vices.

That upholding moral principles is always the better path, even in the face of hardship.

That you will die someday.

And that inspite of all the bad in the world, it is worth persevering and finding the love and joy that is out there.

[the-jnadf-man]

What do I even turn into

Letters???

I'm JohN AlDFabet now????

We ask your questions anonymously so you don’t have to! Submissions are open on the 1st and 15th of the month.

[the-jnadf-man]

I know that some British people take umbrage at Americans calling the Great British Bake Off relaxing, but it's just because GBBO is such a different kind of stressful from American baking shows.

American baking shows will be called something like "Cupcake Knife Fight", there's horror movie lighting everywhere and dramatic stings every 5 seconds. All of the contestants are shit talking each other and fist fighting over the one single deep fryer provided by production. It will show the judges all whispering to each other at their super villain table overlooking the whole kitchen, and one will be like, "Oh my god. Everyone look at Brenda right now. She's straight tanking it." And it will cut to Brenda, who is running around covered in flour and crying and also bleeding for some reason. Then you get a clip from an interview with one of the contestants, and they're like, "I really need to win this. Without this award money, I'm gonna need to close my restaurant, sell my dad, and live out of my car. AGAIN." Then the giant digital doomsday clock overhead lets out a horrid klaxon, the judges tell half of them that their cupcakes taste disgusting, and one of them gets eliminated and sent to walk down the dramatically-lit shame hallway never to be seen again.

Meanwhile GBBO is in a lovely, brightly colored tent, there are delightful and friendly hosts/jesters there to keep everyone entertained, and all of the B Roll is of like... a bumblebee going into a flower, or a lamb running in a field. And yes, there will be moments where someone will mess up their timing or something, and they'll be looking at their bake through the oven door like, "oh gosh I don't think this will rise in time!" Then they stand up to find Paul Hollywood directly behind them ominously. His creepy whitewalker eyes will glow white, and he'll say something like "the 12th of June. 2035. Drowning." And his eyes will go back to normal and he'll walk away. Then the baker gives a playful grimace to the camera and says "that didnt sound great, did it?". Cut to a sweet looking older woman sipping tea on a stool and she says "oo I do hope that Prue enjoys the taste of my sugary, sticky baps!". Then, at the end, someone gets a gold star for doing good, and the loser of the episode gets in the middle of a giant group hug. You see all of them at the end of the series at a giant carnival with their families and the post credits informs you that all of the contestants have become a Partridge Family-style traveling band and stayed friends forever.

[the-jnadf-man]

what the fuck

[the-jnadf-man]

[the-jnadf-man]

Update:

The wall rats are back.

[the-jnadf-man]

i must not stir the pot. stirring the pot is the notifications-killer. participation in the discourse is the little-death that brings total activity obliteration. i will face the bad opinions on the internet. i will permit them to pass over me and through me. and when they have gone past, i will turn the block button onto their source. where the discourse has come from there will be nothing. only i will remain.

[the-jnadf-man]

Ok, ok, hypothetical. You and your party have sealed the great evil demonlord in an amulet.

You are a canny adventurer, and have heard many a tale of artifacts like these that end in tragedy, either from some corruptive force emanating from them or some dickhead finding where the thing was hidden and breaking the demonlord free.

You're going to be smarter than those chumps. What do you do to safeguard the amulet and keep the evil sealed for good?

[the-jnadf-man]

Where IS that funky guy?

the gang's all here!

[the-jnadf-man]

Photobomb by an adorable street cat in Montañita Ecuador.

[the-jnadf-man]

Saying “yeah bro I move exactly like a jumping spider when I get drunk” and then watching everyone flinch every time I tense my legs after taking a sip of my vermouth

[the-jnadf-man]

Would you have liked to see an OVA from Genndy showing how the life had turned out for (most of) fan-favorite Samurai Jack characters in the altered future without Aku? Or you think this is the stuff best left to the viewer's imagination?

best left to the viewer's imagination. particularly since i feel like, since their lives are good now, they're not interesting enough to tell a story about lmao.

... unless it's like, "jack retires happy he saved the world from a horrible fate, and then we jump forward 10,000 years and see that demongo conquered the world instead and is ten times worse than aku" or something. that'd be funny.

BUT, like i say in this post (just the bottom reblog, you can scroll past all the other replies), my mind feels like "obviously none of the characters we met exist anymore" is the most logical ending, but if push comes to shove "we're ignoring the butterfly effect and somehow all the same characters are born" is probably what genndy would do if he told another story about the future, because the alternative would be depressing to watch (and also what would be the point of seeing a future with literally zero of the characters or settings we know about*). so I'd prefer not to see the future so that "nobody exists anymore" and "everyone still exists and has better lives" can live together in schrodinger's box in harmony.

(*unless we get funny option #2: genndy hypes up this special that's gonna be over an hour long about the future of samurai jack's world with aku gone, and then when the special is released it's just the powerpuff girls movie, completely unaltered.)

[the-jnadf-man]

The ol’ jitterbug

[the-jnadf-man]

[the-jnadf-man]

does anyone wanna hold hands until we feel a little braver

[the-jnadf-man]

Hornet you do not have to fake date, your mom was yuring it up w Vespa