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That sounds really shallow and stupid. Let’s try it.

Avatar: The Last Airbender (2005–2008)

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Best be fearin’ for your life there, captain

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(via mrshatakevakarian-deactivated20)

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(via avataraang)

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As I Was Moving Ahead Occasionally I Saw Brief Glimpses of Beauty

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Notice if you are obsessing about how to spend more time with him, are you calling, texting, asking him questions but not getting much in return? Does it feel like you see him more on his terms than on your own? If so, pull back. You are over functioning. A relationship cannot launch, let alone continue to run, on your fumes alone. If you are feeling low energy from your partners and a sense that you are doing all of the work, redirect your attention and energy elsewhere. Are you rationalizing these red flags? Maybe telling yourself that it is your fault or if you do something differently, perhaps he will not act in the ways described above? Remember, it is impossible to bring a successful relationship into being if you are the only one doing the work. Cease. Desist. Move on. Distract into self-improvement or connecting with other more emotionally healthy friends and romantic interests.

Jill P. Weber: Having Sex, Wanting Intimacy

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hoe tips 💅💕

• if you have sensitive skin, avoid foaming cleansers that act as astringets!! lemon and witch hazel cleansers are going to tear your shit up and leave your skin thinner and fucked. go with aloe and natural ingredients for better results, no problemo bih 👊

• that drink 8 cups or 64oz don’t work for me. makes a bitch too damn full!! work your way from soda and sugary drinks like juice and take it step by step. but let’s be honest, everyone drinks it, so don’t beat yourself up about it, drink what you want. if you aim to decrease the amount of soda/juice, always go back to the basics: a big ol’ cup of water. consume the amount of water that goes hand in hand with your weight, not just out of the blue 5-6 cups. a good alternative is putting fruit in your water if you don’t like the taste. or, you can always flavor it! 🌟

• don’t go too all out on those lip scrubs! if you do it too often, such as four times a week, your lips are going to get drier, crustier, and feel stripped and thin. we’ve all been there! exfoliate 1-2x a week to avoid this. however, chapstick does the job too 💋

• mix avocado oil, jojoba oil, sweet almond oil, and aloe vera gel and dilute the oils with water and pour it into a spray bottle. this is crucial as a detangler and a boost to the hair. makes it all soft and shit 👏 unfortunately, it’s a bit pricey, so you can always look for sales or discounts online!

• rose hip oil softens lips 💞

• lips are what everybody looks at. do you want them looking chapped asf?! invest in a lip mask. slather on organic manuka honey that is unrefined for 10 minutes, and then wash off with warm water or a washcloth👍

• dandelion root tea is a good substitute for coffee, but coffee’s good too, so just indulge in both!☕

• most of us stay up long into the mornings, which probably makes us wake up with dark circles and eye bags. don’t fret! to nix puffiness, dampen a washcloth with ice cold water and leave it on your eyes and under them for 3-5 minutes. if this is in morning, it can also help you wake up! if you’re looking to treat yourself, invest in some eye patches! 👼

• rose water is a GREAT toner! once you dab it on your face with a cotton ball, you immediately feel refreshed and ready to start your day 💪 teddie organics has a mist on sale for $10.88! it’s on amazon.

• applying sunscreen is essential to protect your skin from those nasty uv rays. but some forget their hair! if you get a sunburn on your scalp, it will hurt like HELL 🔥use spray sunscreen specialized for hair and slightly mist your hairline to avoid it. use a heat protectant like argan oil if you a broke hoe like me 💯 stack up!

on another note, don’t trust hair products with supposed uv filters. those only protect your hair color, not your actual hair!

• washing your hair, it’s better to wash it first with hot/warm water and then do the second wash with cold water to close up and seal moisture into the hair follicles! 4c hair especially needs this 👱

• hair products with OIL, PLASTICIZERS, and SILICONES will definitely clog your pores if they get on your skin and will leave your ass at square 1!! avoid that.

• yogurt and miso soup are probiotics that help fasten metabolism and hold moisture in your skin! 😇 that’s why yogurt face masks are bomb and every person should try them :)

• if you live in new york, atlanta, etc., you are bound to pollution. that’s why it’s always good to wash your face before bed to get rid of pollutant particles that will clog pores. afterwards, apply an antioxidant serum and a good moisturizer! lean towards products with white tea, green tea, and vitamin c to make the ultimate pore-cleansing mask! it’ll leave your skin feeling clean and make it glow 🌟🌟

• deep condition your hair 1-2 times a week or every two weeks!! it’s intense and has your hair feeling silky smooth. avocado, mayo, honey, sweet almond oil, and coconut oil mixture is my go-to, and my curls have blossomed! if you buy a deep conditioner from the store, make sure it’s water based and is sulfate free and paraben free (shea moisture and as i am are superb for beard cleansers as well!)👸💋

• go barefaced. prove to misogynistic assholes that makeup does not define a person’s beauty or attractiveness nor their personality. embrace your flaws and remain imperfect to society, because you are the one who knows that you are perfect 💋👏👏

• be yourself, work hard, and recognize your fucking worth 💕💕💕

• btw, honey ain’t shit if it’s not organic and raw. coconut oil ain’t shit for the hair or skin if it’s not unrefined, organic, and virgin (extra virgin is even better)! essential oil like tea tree oil that helps as acne treatments are skin-thinners if you don’t dilute them with water or a different substance. rose water ain’t shit if it’s not organic and 100% pure 😑😢 invest in your skincare/lifestyle! go online and dig for the right prices and take them before they’re all gone!

happy hoeing!

[thecodeddddd]

tips for treating yoself

body:

Exfoliate once or twice a week.

Let your vagina breathe - don’t wear underwear to bed unless you’re on your period.

Change your pad/tampon/etc at least twice a day.

Don’t wash up inside your vagina (aka douching) it will tip the pH balance in your vagina and you will end up with an infection, you can wash around your thighs/pubic area but that’s it, same applies with perfumes and other body cosmetics.

Use coconut oil its good for so many things!!

Use body butters after getting out of the shower.

Use tea-tree oil for pimples.

Use sunscreen!!!

For people with oily skin - use blotting paper around your eyes and in your T - zone.

Don’t squeeze/pick at pimples - the bacteria on your hands will only make them worse and will create more redness.

Always use moisturiser before applying makeup

When washing your vagina, lift up the clitoral hood and softly rub your finger along the hood to wipe away dead skin cells. If you end up masturbating, fuck it.

Hair:

Wash your hair every 2-3 days. Don’t wash every day because it will make your head dry, try dry shampoos instead.

Use conditioning treatments weekly in the summer to prevent your hair from losing it’s colour.

Brush your curls with your fingers to create a more tousled look.

Before blow drying your hair use volumizing spray or gel on your roots for more definition in your hair.

Use shampoos that are sulfate free as sulfates dry and damage your hair quicker.

If your hair is greasy avoid conditioning the roots, just the ends.

Trim your hair every 6-8 weeks so you have healthy hair and no damaged ends.

Use avacado oil on your hair in the winter to stop your hair from drying out.

Dry shampoo is also very good for volumizing your hair.

The best way to get rid of ingrown hair is to exfoliate.

Avoid dry shaving your pubes, this will cause redness and spots which are easily treated with hydrocortisone cream or aloe vera.

If you are to shave, use conditioner instead of shaving cream - you will get a smoother result - that goes for anywhere you shave.

If you have a big ole mess in your pants try trimming your bush before you shave/wax it.

Waxing HURTS so if you’re dealing with the burns then place a cold towel in the sore area and leave it for about 15 minutes and then apply aloe.

If you experience chest/breast hair the best thing to do is pluck the hairs, it’s painful but rewarding.

Makeup:

Clean your makeup brushes, regularly along with any other makeup appliances (beauty blenders, makeup pads) in a mix of warm water and a little bit of soap.

Use a blotting tissue and then add a small amout of cream concealer onto your eye makeup to prevent smudging.

Matte lipstick goes best with a shimmer eye makeup.

Wearing white eyeliner counteracts the redness in your eyes.

To make your cheekbones appear higher, use bronzer under the cheekbone and highlighter on the actual cheekbone.

In summer if you want to avoid caking yourself with foundation - use tinted moisturiser or BB cream instead.

Always wash your makeup off before going to bed, don’t leave it on.

Always make sure you blend your foundation so your neck isn’t a different colour to your face.

Clean your makeup bag out every once in a while and get rid of any products you don’t use - its cleaner, tidier and more hygienic. 

Always make sure you have tape and q-tips handy. Tape is great for a perfect winged eyeliner and q-tips are great for cleaning and tidying up those hard to reach areas.

Concealer works great for a base for your eye makeup as the makeup will stick to it. 

Using highlighter and illuminators on your cheekbones, browbone and cupid’s bow for a “dewy look”.

When using cream products like eyeshadow or blush - use translucent powder to set it in place.

Kat Von-D lipstick is blow job proof :)

Replace mascara and eyeliners every 3 months or so.

Don’t share makeup/appliances for your eyes, it may cause infections like conjunctivitis and maybe a sty.

Blot your lips after applying lipstick to avoid getting lipstick teeth. 

General:

Change your bra every 5-11 days.

Always make sure your feet are dry before putting on socks and shoes to prevent fungal infections.

Wash blood stained clothes in cold water with 2 tablespoons of salt.

Try your own homemade beauty recipes.

If you peel/lick your lips it will damage them, don’t do that.

Applying eye cream on the cuticles of your nails will make them stronger and healthier.

Always carry tampons/pads even when you’re not on your period, someone else might need them.

Clean out your purse!! Get rid of all that junk and you will thank yourself next time you’re looking for something.

Masturbate. Whenever you can, it’s rewarding and good for you. (yes girls masturbate too).

Always pee after sex/masturbation to help avoid getting a UTI.

Bio-oil is good for stretch marks (as well as loving them).

Save some nice underwear for yourself and just wear your dead old pants when you’re on your period.

Buy yourself some nice underwear/lingerie whenever you can. Make sure it’s 100% cotton though otherwise you can get a yeast infection.

Test yourself every once in a while for STDs. It’s necessary.

Carry a condom on you, it’s not just the guy’s responsibility.

Apply a damp tissue to blotchy, red skin after crying, it will make you look as if you haven’t been crying at all.

Don’t let boys ruin your day.

Use a paperclip to clip the back of your bra straps together to create a racerback bra.

Wrap a maxi pad or pantyliner around any poking underwires in your bra.

Wash your pillow case every 1-2 weeks to help prevent acne. 

Cucumbers are good for dark circles and puffy eyes just place a slice over your eyes and leave for about 15 minutes.

treat and love yourself and your body will reward you!!! 

[thecodeddddd]

100 Attraction Principles from “Why Men Love B!tches” 1. Anything a person chases in life runs away. 2. The women who have the men climbing the walls for them aren’t always exceptional. Often, they are the ones who don’t appear to care too much. 3. A woman is perceived as offering a mental challenge to the degree that a man doesn’t feel he has a 100 percent hold on her. 4. Sometimes a man deliberately won’t call, just to see how you’ll respond. 5. If you start out dependent, it turns him off. But if it is something he can’t have, it becomes more of a challenge for him to get it. 6. It is your attitude about yourself that a man will adopt. 7. Act like a prize and you’ll turn him into a believer. 8. The biggest variable between a ***** and a woman who is too nice is fear. The ***** shows that she’s not afraid to be without him. 9. If the choice is between her dignity and having a relationship, the ***** will prioritize her dignity above all else. 10. When a woman doesn’t give in easily and doesn’t appear docile or submissive, it becomes more stimulating to obtain her. 11. Being right on the verge of getting something generates a desire that has to be satisfied. 12. A man knows which woman will give in to last-minute requests. 13. Whether you have terms and conditions indicates whether you have options. Almost immediately, you present yourself as a doormat or a dreamgirl. 14. If you smother him, he’ll go into defense mode and look for an escape route to protect his freedom. 15. Whenever a woman requires too many things from a man, he’ll resent it. Let him give what he wants to give freely; then observe who he is. 16. A ***** gives a man plenty of space so he doesn’t fear being trapped in a cage. Then..he sets out to trap her in his. 17. If you tell him you are not interested in jumping into a relationship with both feet, he will set out to try to change your mind. 18. Always give the appearance that he has plenty of space. It gets him to drop his guard. 19. More than anything else, he watches to see if you’ll be too emotionally dependent on him. 20. He must feel that you choose to be with him, not that you need to be with him. Only then will he perceive you as an equal partner. 21. If a man has to wait before he sleeps with a woman, he’ll not only perceive her as more beautiful, he’ll also take him time to appreciate who she is. 22. Sex and the “spark” are not one and the same. 23. Before sex, a man isn’t thinking clearly and a woman is thinking clearly. After sex, it reverses. The man is thinking clearly and the woman isn’t. 24. Every man wants to have sex first; whether he wants a girlfriend is something he thinks about later. By not giving him what he wants up front, you become his girlfriend without him realizing it. 25. A man intuitively senses whether sexuality comes from a place of security or from a place of neediness. He knows when a woman is having sex to appease him. 26. Bad habits are easier to form than good ones, because good habits require conscious effort. Waiting encourages this effort. 27. If you pull the sexual plug at the last minute, he’ll label you a tease. 28. If he makes you feel insecure, let your insecurity be your guide. 29. A quality guy fantasizes about a woman who genuinely loves sex. 30. Any time a woman competes with another woman, she demeans herself. 31. When there is that undeniable “spark,” there is only one key to the lock. 32. Let him think he’s in control. He’ll automatically start doing things you want done because he’ll always want to look like “a king” in your eyes. 33. When you cater to his ego in a soft way, he doesn’t try to get power in an aggressive way. 34. When you appear softer and more feminine, you appeal to his instinct to protect. When you appear more aggressive, you appeal to his instinct to compete. 35. He’ll let a woman who becomes his doormat pay for dinner on the first couple of dates, but he wouldn’t think of it with his dreamgirl. 36. The token power position is for public display, but the true power position is for private viewing only. And this is the only one that matters. 37. If you give him a feeling of power, he’ll want to protect you and he’ll want to give you the world. 38. When a woman acts as though she’s capable of everything, she gets stuck doing everything. 39. Men don’t respond to words. They respond to no contact. 40. Talking about the “relationship” too much takes away the element of the “unknown” and thus the mystery. 41. Men respect women who communicate in a succinct way, because it’s the language men use to talk to one another. 42. When you are always HAPPY; And he is always free to GO; he feels LUCKY. 43. If you allow your rhythm to be interrupted, you’ll create a void. Then, to replace what you give up, you’ll start to expect and need more from your partner. 44. Most women are starving to receive something from a man that they need to give to themselves. 45. A woman looks more secure in a man’s eyes when he can’t pull her away from her life, because she is content with her life. 46. The second a woman works overtime to make herself fit his criteria, she has lowered the standard of that relationship. 47. You jump through hoops any time you repeatedly make it very obvious you’re giving your “all.” 48. You have to keep from being sucked down into quicksand. Unless you maintain control over yourself, the relationship is doomed. 49. Jumping through hoops often has a negative outcome: He sees it as an opportunity to have his cake and eat it, too. But when you stay just outside his reach, he’ll stay on his best behavior. 50. The nice girl gives away too much of herself when pleasing him regularly becomes more important than pleasing herself.

51. The relationship may not be right for you if you find yourself jumping through hoops. When something is right, it will feel easier and much more effortless. 52. When you nag, he tunes you out. But when you speak with your actions, he pays attention. 53. When a man takes a woman for granted, he still looks for reassurance that she is still “right there.” 54. When the routine becomes predictable, he’s more likely to give you the same type of love he had for his mother–and the odds that he will take you for granted increase. 55. Negative attention is still attention. It lets a man know that he has you–right where he wants you. 56. When you treat him casually as though he’s a friend, he’ll come your way. Because he wants things to be romantic, but he also wants to be the pursuer. 57. A little distance combined with the appearance of self-control makes him nervous that he may be losing you. 58. A man takes a woman for granted when he’s interested, but will no longer go out of his way. 59. When you nag, you become the problem, and he deals with it by tuning you out. But when you don’t nag, he deals with the problem. 60. If you take his chores away from him and praise someone else for doing it, he’ll want his chores back. 61. When you nag, he sees weakness. 62. He perceives an emotional woman as more of a pushover. 63. In the same way that familiarity breeds contempt, a slightly aloof demeanor can often renew his respect. 64. He’ll forget what he has in you, unless you remind him. 65. Many women talk a lot out of nervousness–which is something that men will often perceive as insecurity. 66. Talking about feelings to a man will feel like work. When he’s with a woman, he wants it to feel like fun. 67. Forcing him to talk about feelings all the time will not only make you seem needy, it will eventually make him lose respect. And when he loses respect, he’ll pay even less attention to your feelings. 68. In the beginning, the only thing you need to pay attention to is whether he keeps coming around, because he’ll only be able to suspend or hide his emotions for so long. 69. Men treat women the way they treat other men. They “play it cool: because they don’t want to appear weak or desperate. 70. The element of suprise both inside and outside of the bedroom is important to men, and it adds to the excitement. 71. Don’t always do the same thing over and over in the bedroom. Vary it so that it doesn’t become a predictable routine. 72. Most men tend to disrespect a woman who appears to be too malleable. 73. Don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself or speak your mind. It will not only earn his respect, in some cases it will even turn him on. 74. Men often automatically assume that a *****ier woman will be more assertive in bed, and that a nice girl will be more timid. 75. When a man falls in love, suddenly he’ll go out of his way and think nothing of it. He’ll do things for this woman he wouldn’t have done for anyone else. 76. He’ll never respect you as being able to hold your own unless you can stand on your own too feet financially. 77. You have to show that you won’t accept mistreatment. Then you will keep his respect. 78. Your pink slip is maintained when you can stand on your own–with him or without him. He should never feel that you are completely as his mercy. 79. When a man views a woman as a “little girl” or a sister he has to take care of, the passion diminishes. He doesn’t want to make love to his sister. 80. The ability to choose how you want to live, and the ability to choose how you want to be treated are the two things that give you more power than any material object ever will. 81. In a relationship of any kind, if one person feels the other person isn’t bringing anything to the table, he or she will begin to disrespect that person. 82. Financial neediness is no different than emotional neediness; in both instances, he can still get the feeling that he has a 100 percent hold on you. 83. Regardless of how pretty a woman is, looks alone will not sustain his respect. Appearance may pull him in, but it is your independence that will keep him turned on. 84. When a man is very consumed with not being taken advantage of, this is a sign that he’s “on the take.” 85. People will show you they have self-respect simply by virtue of the fact that they want to carry their own weight. 86. The more independent you are of him, the more interested he will be. 87. If you make it too obvious that you’re excited to get something, some people will be tempted to dangle a carrot in front of your face. 88. When you alter the routine, your not being there is what will make him come around. Men don’t respond to words. What they respond to is no contact. 89. Don’t give a reward for bad behavior. 90. He simply won’t respect a woman who automatically goes into overdrive to please him. 91. If he doesn’t give you a time, you don’t have a date. 92. Often the best way to adjust or fix the problem is by not letting him know it’s being fixed. When you alter your availability or change a predictable routine, it will mentally pull him back in. 93. Once you start laughing, you start healing. 94. You can get away with saying much more with humor than you can with a straight face. 95. A man feels he’s won, or conquered a woman, when she eats out of the palm of his hand. At which point, he begins to get bored. 96. The tension that arises with a slightly *****y woman gives a subtle feeling of danger to a man. He feels slightly unsure because she is never in the palm of his hand. 97. A “yes” woman who gives too much sends the impression that she believes in the man more than she believes in herself. Men view this as weakness not kindness. 98. Be an independent thinker at all times, and ignore anyone who attempts to define you in a limiting way. 99. Truly powerful people don’t explain why they want respect. They simply don’t engage someone who doesn’t give it to them. 100. The most attractive quality of all is dignity.

[thecodeddddd]

tips for your first brazillian wax 😅

-exfoliate down there with a washcloth the day of to get rid of any dead skin, this makes waxing a little easier.

-make sure your hair is at least ¼ of an inch long. any shorter and the wax wont be able to grip the hair. 

- make sure you’re going to a reputable waxing place. no nail salons! (they’re often not licensed to do waxes and can spread bacteria and infections)

-wear a loose cotton skirt/dress or sweats. don’t wear jeans or anything tight because friction + freshly waxed kitty = tears

-don’t go in on your period. while it’s def possible for you to do so while wearing a tampon, it’s better not to because you’ll be sensitive down there and that’ll make the experience all around more painful.

-taking advil (or any other type of ibuprofen really) 45 minutes to an hour before your appointment can help with the pain.

-don’t feel embarrassed about being naked in front of your waxer. they literally see EVERYBODY naked. whatever you’re scared of them seeing, they’ve already seen it a hundred times.

-during the wax, i find that taking deep breaths can really help relax you. when you feel your waxer spread the wax on, breathe in, then breathe out slowly as they rip it off. don’t hold your breath, this can make you tense and cause more pain.

-if your waxer is using liquid wax and you notice at ANY point that they double dip the stick into the wax after using it on you, get up and leave. this is not only gross, but a HUGE health risk.

-when you get home after the wax, you might notice some irritation and/or redness. sitting in cold water or putting a cold wash cloth down there can soothe your skin. 

-i find that applying witch hazel with a cotton pad and then following up with aloe vera to moisturize is the best after wax treatment. witch hazel is a gentle antiseptic and aloe vera helps moisturize and soothe the skin without being heavy and oily.

[thecodeddddd]

12 Steps For Self Care

If it feels wrong, don’t do it

Say exactly what you mean

Don’t be a people pleaser

Trust your instincts 

Never speak bad about yourself

Never give up on your dreams

Don’t be afraid to say “no”

Don’t be afraid to say “yes”

Be KIND to yourself

Let go of what you can’t control

Stay away from drama & negativity

LOVE

[thecodeddddd]

i support girls anger. i support girls who yell. i support girls who get called bitches and cunts at parties because they’ll swear at guys who won’t leave them alone. i support girls who don’t believe in second chances and cut off people who hurt them. i support girls who say no the first time and flip you off if you ask them again. i support girls who will never allow themselves to be pushovers and constantly get shit for it. you’re fucking incredible. 

[thecodeddddd]

Taking care of your kitty.

Ladies, time for some self care advice.

Your coochie deserves as much attention as your face when it comes to taking care of it. Maintaining proper hygene and going the extra mile to ensure everything is perfectly healthy and balanced down there will minimize your risk of bacteria, infections, bad smell and dryness. Your partner will also thank you!

Here’s what you should do.

-Neveeeeeeeeer use soap/ bodywash on or near your kitty.                  The harsh chemicals and the high pH level will disimbalance the delicate flora of the vag and can cause long term issues as well as leave you exposed to threats like yeast infection. Vagina is a self cleaning organ. You can use a femine wash though I would advice for simple, plain water.

-Do not use hair removal creams!                                                                    I would avoid them all together but if its your preffered method of hair removal at least keep them away from your coochie as they will cause a yeast infection!

-Avoid douches at all costs!                                                                           They might make you feel fresher but they won’t help with odor or cleaness plus they actually increase the risk of infections.

-Drink your water!                                                                                           Do I even need to say more? Just do it… Jesus…

-Cranberry extract.                                                                                          You’ll find it at the drugstore, usually in a softgel form. Cranberries are very beneficial as they strengthen the urinary tract and prevent UTI. Also they will make your kitty taste and smell delish.

-Pinapple juice.                                                                                            This will also help with vag odor and taste.

-Probiotics.                                                                                                   Consume foods with probiotics like greek yogurt, kimchi, kombucha, etc… You don’t have to take supplements unless you feel extremelly imbalanced or you’re taking/recovering from antibiotics. If you seek supplements look for the ones that are suitable for the vaginal flora.

-ACV baths.                                                                                                  Once in a few weeks pour 1-2 cups of apple cider vingar in a warm bathtub and sit for 20 minutes or longer. This will help lower your pH.

-Always use a condom.                                                                                      If latex condoms make you sore or give you a rash switch to latex free.

Enjoy a healthier kitty babes.

[thecodeddddd]

XIII Ways to Be a Lady

I. Always call and return your mother’s calls as promptly as you possibly can. Remind her in every conversation how appreciative you are – how much you love, miss and adore her. II. Make it a ritual to smile every morning. Doing so will send signals to the brain making it think it’s happy. Smiling is associated with happiness; this will naturally help the brain release endorphins (a chemical that promotes a healthy, elevated attitude). Maintaining a balanced diet and consistent workout regimen helps as well. III. Invest no time on men who feel indifferent towards your interests. A man who does not care what melodies ignite your heart strings with love, or exchanges words of endearment, is a man not worth getting to know. Real men know to cater to their significant other – internal and external. IV. Keep all negative social media activities to a minimum, no real lady engages or wastes time on things like Twitter subtweets or passive-aggressive Facebook statuses. Social media is démodé. V. Broaden your horizons. Become well-rounded, learn a new language, read more books, watch classic foreign films, subscribe to travelogue, take a culinary course! Culture yourself, actually know what you are talking about. No one likes a pretentious snob. VI. Stop looking at marriage as the defining endeavor in a woman’s life, no matter how much it has been ingrained into you. It should neither be something you actively disdain, nor something you seek out with deadlines. It’ll happen when you’re ready. VII. Never allow anyone to stop you from crying. Crying cleanses the soul. All you need is a rose petal bubble bath, aromatherapy and chamomile tea. Immerse yourself in a chocolate coma at Max Brenner if you must. Comfort food was made for moments like these. VIII. Your home should be a reflection of who you are. Keep fresh-cut flowers in your home, scented candles (personally, I love Diptyque and Jo Malone fragrance oils). Acquire a signature wine and master a delectable dish you can always serve to your guest – be a great hostess! IX. Show respect to people who don’t even deserve it; not as a reflection of their character, but as a reflection of yours. What you say about others says a lot more about you. X. Date the kind of person who will still respect you when you no longer love them. Date the kind of person who will still respect you when they no longer love you. Do not waste your emotional capacities on individuals whose respect for you is conditional. XI. Have at least one outfit ready in your wardrobe for almost every occasion: job interview, your first date, family events etc. The amount of headaches that can be spared by simply having a versatile blazer, LBD and pencil skirt at one’s disposal are incalculable. XII. What would Grace Kelly do? When in doubt, Rosé. XIII. Live by this quote: “Be soft. Do not let the world make you hard. Do not let pain make you hate. Do not let the bitterness steal your sweetness. Take pride that even though the rest of the world may disagree, you still believe it to be a beautiful place.” —Kurt Vonnegut

[thecodeddddd]

SWER Media Club

MANGA & COMICS

Rent Girl by: Michelle Tea

Paying for It: a Comic Strip Memoir About Being by: Chester Brown

Sex Criminals by: Matt Fraction

PINK by: Kyoko Okazaki

Delivery Cinderella by: NON

MAGAZINES & ZINES

strip-magazine

$pread

KINDLE HOW TO’s

Ho Tactics: How to MindF**k A Man into Spending, Spoiling, and Sponsoring

A Gold Digger’s Guide: How to get what you want without giving it up

Blueprint for an Escort Service

Blueprint for an Escort Service 2: Beyond the Original Blueprint

The Courtesan Handbook

The Internet Escort’s Handbook Book 1: The Foundation

The Internet Escort’s Handbook Book 2: Advertising and Marketing

How to Start an Escort Business I

How to Start an Escort Business II

How to Start an Escort Business III

Digital Sex Work: How Your Webcam, Cell Phone & Pedicure Can Make You Rich

Cam Girl 2.0: Make Boss Money at Home While Keeping Your Panties On

Start Earning Over $40 an Hour as a Webcam Model Now!

How To Succeed As A Webcam Model

Talking Dirty: Getting into the Phone Sex Industry and Staying There

Greedy: A Guide to Financial Domination

The Mistress Manual: A Good Girl’s Guide to Female Dominance

The Sugar Daddy Formula: A Sugar Baby’s Ultimate Guide to Finding a Wealthy Sugar Daddy

Sugar Daddy 101: What You Need to Know if You Want to be a Sugar Baby

Make Money Stripping: how to make money as an exotic dancer tonight!

Stripping: Your Guide for Making Money in a Tough Economy

The Nerdy Girl’s Guide to Stripping: A 10-Step Guide for Stripping Your Way to Success

The Pole Position: Is Stripping for You? And How to Stay Healthy Doing It

Zen And The Art of Stripping: A Very Naughty Tale

Secrets of The Lazy Stripper: The Ultimate Exotic Dancer Package Book 1

How to Make More Money in the Gentlemen’s Club: The Ultimate Exotic Dancer Package Book 2

The Successful Stripper: The Ultimate Exotic Dancer Package Book 3

Lap Dance: The Ultimate Guide to Being the Best Exotic Dancer: The Ultimate Exotic Dancer Package Book 4

FICTION

After Dark by: Haruki Murakami and Jay Rubin

Around the World in 80 Men by: Brandi Ratliff

Bitter Sweet: A Controversial Crime Thriller by: Mason N. Forbes

Black Girl in Paris by: Shay Youngblood

Changing His Game by: Justine Elvira

Dance Dance Dance by: Haruki Murakami

Escorted by: Claire Kent

Evocronik 1.0 by Jc Weatherby

Gutterboys by: Alvin Orloff

Heaven by: Kimberly Cain

I Am Not Myself These Days by: Josh Kilmer-Purcell

In Lucia’s Eyes by: Arthur Japi

In the Company of the Courtesan by: Sarah Dunant

Kushiel’s Dart by: Jacqueline Carey

Mistress of My Fate by Hallie Rubenhold

Private Dancer by Stephen Leather

Safe Houses by: Lynne Alexander

Six Moon Dance by: Sheri S. Tepper

Slammerkin by: Emma Donoghue

Southern Discomfort by: Rita Mae Brown

The Balcony by: Jean Genet

The Butterfly Trap by: Dennis Jon

The Crimson Petal and the White by: Michael Faber

The Dress Lodger by: Sheri Holman

The Gargoyle by: Andrew Davidson

The Handmaid’s Tale by: Margaret Atwood

The Past Never Ends by: Jackson Burnett

The Submission Gift by: Solace Ames x review

Tipping the Velvet by: Sarah Waters

FANFICTION

Underland by: jellyheart84

Creamsickle by: Rhiannon Argo

Harry Potter Porn Star by: Reverie Wilde

Innocent Games by: Wynja

Dating Backwards by: RemainNameless

Escort Services by: Tempest-2455

In Which Tess Hires Teen Prostitutes by: Incidental Vegan Cannibal

Personal by: Incidental Vegan Cannibal

BIOGRAPHIES

Unrepentant Whore: the Collected Works of Scarlot Harlot by: Scarlot Harlot

Cop to Call Girl: Why I Left the LAPD to Make an Honest Living as a Beverly Hills Prostitute by: Norma Jean Almodovar

Working: my Life as a Prostitute by:  Dolores French

Woman at Point Zero by: Nawal El Saadawi

Strip City by: Lily Burana

Spent by: Antonia Crane

In My Skin; a Memoir of Addiction by: Kate Holden

The Story About Me: a Hijra Life Story by: A. Revathi

Bare: the Naked Truth About Stripping by: Elisabeth Eaves

a Piece of  Cake by: Cupcake Brown

Ordeal by: Linda Lovelace

Dominatrix on Trail: Bedford vs Canada by: Terri-Jean Bedford

Conertina: the Life and Loves of a Dominatrix by: Susan Winemaker

The Mayflower Madam: the Secret Life of Sydeny Biddle Barrows by: Sydney Biddle Barrows

Madam Inside a Nevada Brothel by: Lora Shaner

How to Make Love Like a Porn Star by: Jenna Jameson

Inside Seka: The Platinum Princess of Porn by: Seka

The Best Kept Boy in the World by: Arthur Vanderbilt

Belle du Jour by: Belle du Jour

Insatiable; Porn a Love Story by: Asa Akira

Rent Girl by: Michelle Tea

The Little Black Book of Griselidis Real: Days and Nights of an Anarchist Whoreby: Jean-Luc Hennig

Naked in The Promised Land by: Lillian Faderman

The Last of the Live Nude Girls by: Sheila McClear

Indecent: How I Make it and Fake it as a Girl for Hire by: Sarah Katherine Lewis

Hos, Hookers, Call Girls and Rent Boys: Professionals Writing on Life, Love, Money and Sex

Johns, Marks, Trick and Chickenhawks: Professionals and Their Clients Writing About Each Other

SOCIOLOGY

$pread: The Best of the Magazine that Illuminated the Sex Industry and Started a Media Revolution by: Rachel Aimee

Brothel: Mustang Ranch and Its Women by: Alexa Albert

Encyclopedia of Prostitution and Sex Work by: Melissa Hope Ditmore

Flesh for Fantasy: Producing and Consuming Exotic Dance by: Merri Lisa Jhonson and Danielle Egan

Global Sex Workers: Rights, Resistance, and Redefinition by: Kamala Kempadoo and Jo Doezema

Global Woman: Nannies, Maids, and Sex Workers in the New Economy by: Barbara Ehrenreich

G-Strings and Sympathy: Strip Club Regulars and Male Desire by: Frank Katherine

Honey, Honey, Miss Thang: Being Black, Gay, and on the Streets by: Leon Pettiway

Legalizing Prostitution: From Illicit Vice to Lawful Business by: Ronald Weitzer

AIDS, Drugs and Prostitution by: Martin A. Plant

Live Sex Acts: Women Performing Erotic Labor by: Wendy Chapkis

Love For Sale: A World History of Prostitution by: Nils Johan Ringdal

Making Work, Making Trouble: The Social Regulation of Sexual Labour by: Deborah Brock

Men Who Sell Sex: International Perspectives on Male Prostitution and AIDS by: Peter Aggleton

Naked on the Internet: Hookups, Downloads, and Cashing in on Internet Sexploration by: Audacia Ray

Negotiating Sex Work: Unintended Consequences of Policy and Activism by: Carisa R. Showden

Playing the Whore: The Work of Sex Work by: Melissa Gira Grant

Policing Pleasure: Sex Work, Policy, and the State in Global Perspective by: Susan Dewey

Prostitution and Feminism: Towards a Politics of Feeling by: Maggie O’Neill

Prostitution and Sex Work by: Melissa Hope Ditmore

Selling Sex: A Hidden History of Prostitution by: Raelene Frances

Selling Sex: Experience, Advocacy, and Research on Sex Work in Canada

Sex at the Margins: Migration, Labour Markets and the Rescue Industry by: Laura Maria Agustin

Sex For Sale: Prostitution, Pornography, and the Sex Industry by: Ronald Weitzer

Sex Slaves and Discourse Masters: The Construction of Trafficking by: Jo Doezema

Sex Work and Sex Workers

Sex Work Matters: Exploring Money, Power and Intimacy in the Sex Industry by: Melissa Hope Dittmore

Sex Work On The Streets by: Neil McKeganey and Marina Barnard

Sex Work Politics: From Protest to Service Provision by: Samantha Majic

Sex Work: Rethinking the Job, Respecting the Workers by: Colette Parent, Chris Bruckert and Patrice Corriveau

Sex Work: Writings By Women In The Sex Industry by: Frederique Delacoste

Sex Workers Unite: A History of the Movement from Stonewall to SlutWalk by: Malinda Chateauvert

Strip Club: Gender, Power, and Sex Work by: Kim Price Glynn and Charles Andrain

Taking the crime out of sex work: New Zealand sex workers’ fight for decriminalisation

Temporarily Yours: Intimacy, Authenticity, and the Commerce of Sex by: Elizabeth Bernstein

The Feminist Porn Book: The Politics of Producing Pleasure

The Prostitution Prism by: Gail Pheterson

The State of Sex: Tourism, Sex and Sin in the New American Heartland by: Barbara G. Bents, Crystal A. Jackson and Kathryn Hausbeck

The Story of Jane Doe: a Book About Rape by: Jane Doe

Times Square Red, Times Square Blue by: Samuel R. Delany

Trafficking and Prostitution Reconsidered: New Perspectives on Migration, Sex Work, and Human Rights

Vindication Rights Of Whores by: Gail Pheterson

Whores and Other Feminists by: Jill Nagel

Working Sex: Sex Workers Write About a Changing Industry

TELEVISION SHOWS

Masters of Sex

Deadwood

American Horror Story: Freak Show x review

Firefly

The Playboy Club

The Client List

Secret Diary of a Callgirl

Satisfaction

Hung

Dollhouse

Underbelly The Golden Mile x summary x watch season one

DOCUMENTARIES

Daddies Date Babies

9 to 5 days in porn

American Courtesans

Aroused

Bettie Page Reveals All

Client 9

Live Nude Girls Unite!

Hookers at the Point

Mutantes: Punk Porn Feminism

Paris is Burning

Screaming Queens

Whore’s Glory

Buying Sex

Stripped

Bangladesh: Brothel Justice

Meet the Fokkens

The Great Happiness Space

Scarlet Road

MOVIES

Working Girls

Leaving Las Vegas

My Akward Sexual Adventure

Chloe

Milk Money

Welcome to the Rileys

Gypsy

Showgirls

Mighty Aphrodite

Emotional Truth

Remedy

Magic Mike

Lovelace

Lost Highway

Klute

Inland Empire

The Frozen Ground

Afternoon Delight

Elles

Pretty Woman

Closer

The Best Little Whore House in Texas

Memoirs of a Geisha

Priceless

Baise Moi

Blaze

The Player’s Club

Nathalie

Lap Dance

Breakfast at Tiffany’s

Student Services

The Girlfriend Experience

From the Head

The Center of the World

This Girl’s Life

The Pornographer

Flashdance

The Babysitters

Sweet Charity

Sleeping Beauty

Black Girl in Paris

Stripteaseh

Moulin Rouge!

Les Miserables non-musical and musical

Zombie Strippers

For a Good Time Call

Byzantium

Call Me: the Rise and Fall Heidi Faleiss

Dancing at the Blue Iguana

The Heart Is Deceitful Above All Things

Mysterious Skin

The Machinist

The Wrestler

Sin City

Sucker Punch

Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me

House of Pleasures

I Know Who Killed Me

Someone seriously needs to appreciate the effort, the days that it took for me to find and organize all this information into one place, don’t be shy show me the love.

I AM STILL LOOKING FOR FANFICTION WITH A SEX WORKER AS THE MAIN CHARACTER AS WELL AS ZINES! IF YOU HAVE KNOW OF EITHER PLEASE GIVE ME THE LINK.

[thecodeddddd]

Sweet as Marilyn, Cold as Cleopatra

****Long post alert***. This is primarily for the asks rotting in my inbox for months. Apologies! I have been MIA from Tumblr and the bowl for a while now (sick). Anyway, the title of this post pays homage to two seductresses I admire a lot. My sugar daddies who have been great mentors. The horrible men I’ve dated who have equally taught me a lot. And Robert Greene (author of Art of Seduction and Mastery. Great books. READ them!),You become a master by observing first. Analyze. Learn. Practice. Experiment. Apply. Transform.  "When you learn the rules, you can dominate".

Lesson 1: Seduction is more psychological than physical. The physical aspect of it is important as well. That’s it’s own category. But when you understand what your sugar daddy truly wants, you can (dare I say, ) “manipulate” him better. Anyone can be seductive. From skinny to bbw to medium size to giant scar on your forehead. You can succeed as a sugar baby. You just have to understand how to play the game and yes, I do think it’s all a game. So next time your sugar daddy yaps about his robust, lazy wife who may or may not be fucking the foreign gardener and spends 9 hours at the country club; and his cocaine addicted son at Harvard, LISTEN. He wants a shoulder, so be that. The key here is to show that support, care, and understanding but at the same time, don’t tangle yourself in the drama that you become his on-call therapist. Don’t call him at 10pm at night to check up on him. Unless he’s willing to pay you $800 per hour. When you understand what a person wants/how their mind operates, you can cater to their needs/deal with them better. OBSERVE. When you master psychological seduction, you will be well on your way.

Lesson 2: Be mysterious/intriguing. If your mom kicked you out of the house when you were a fetus, KEEP IT TO YOURSELF, at least in the initial stages. If you dropped out of college when you were still in the womb, keep it to yourself. When you reveal too much of yourself, you tire/bore people and eventually become forgettable. Everyone has a story. So save your sob story and ex boyfriend drama for the struggling author down the street who has been having writer’s block for the past 15 years.  What does Cleopatra,Marilyn Monroe, and Casanova all have in common? Mystery/leaving something to the imagination. These women/man armed themselves with an air of mystery that left those in their wake yearning for more. I’ve never seen Angelina Jolie as one of the most beautiful women on earth. But man there’s something about her that makes Hollywood go crazy. She shares bits of herself and her life but there’s always that edge of mystery. She leaves you wondering what’s going on behind the *is it fake or is it not fake* lips/smile. The key is timing. Don’t share too much.  Keep them guessing. No need for your sugar daddy or pot to know what cards you have up your sleeves. By sharing too much, you make yourself seem needy and DESPERATE. No bueno.

Lesson 3: Don’t always be available. I used to make this mistake, especially when I liked a guy. Never lasted long in my opinion. So I learned and changed tactics and mannnnn things definitely changed. Sometimes, saying NO works more in your favor. I don’t care if you’re bored out of your mind at home and counting the cobwebs on your ceiling. An occasional NO will put a sugar daddy in his place. It will tell him that you’re not at his beck and call. It will also tell him that you have other priorities outside of sugaring. Your life/time does not revolve around him. If he’s that interested in you, trust me, he will reschedule and work with you. Don’t turn into Mrs.NO to Everything but learn how to use it when applicable. This ties in a bit with mystery. When you say no and he asks what your plans for the day are, cultivate a story if you don’t have legit plans! You can say that you’re going on a short getaway with a group of girlfriends, going on a spa treatment for yourself only, etc. The key here is to appear that you have a fun, adventurous life outside. Your time is PRECIOUS.

Lesson 3.5: Create respectable distance. This ties in with 3. By creating respectable distance, you are again putting a sugar daddy in his place. You need space because you have a life. It will command his respect. The thing about a lot of men is that they loveeee a challenge. Especially wealthy men, who are used to having whatever they desire. By giving him what he wants, whenever he wants it, he will exploit that and before you know it, he will detach and disappear (which a lot of guys do). When you challenge him, it will drive him crazy. It will keep him on edge. He will come back for more. So treat yourself like a rare gem. There are vultures out here. So when you play into his wishes easily, well… easy come, easy goes.And before they go, they will devour you completely. When you allow him to insert himself in every aspect of your life, he will probably take advantage of you. The key here is to create enough distance that he’ll keep wondering about you but not so much that he completely forgets you. This can be tricky but it is not impossible.

Lesson 4: Confidence. I’m one of those people who believe that while some have innate confidence, others have to learn it. So if need be, LEARN confidence. It takes time and patience. Trial/error. Note what your shortcomings are and practice on bettering yourself. It could range from repeating daily mantras to yourself to changing a specific look about you, practice! practice! Note what your strengths are and USE it to your advantage. Again practice!  Marilyn Monroe wasn’t always a sultry, seductress. In fact, from her appearance, her voice, her make-up, to her persona, she had to practice it all to master it, especially in public. It took her years, but she eventually morphed into one of the most iconic seductresses of all time.

Lesson 5: Be bold/ assertive. There is a fine line between boldness/assertiveness and Mrs.Yes. It is okay to voice your interests, opinions, dislikes, etc. It is equally okay to disagree with something your sugar daddy says/wants. The key is to do it respectfully. Don’t try so hard to please him that you agree to everything (including things that make you uncomfortable). If he wants you to have sex with his bald, hairy micro-human friend from the country club and the idea makes your vagina retract in disgust, SPEAK UP. Don’t be Mrs. Yes because it can be dangerous to you. Plus you will give him the upper hand.

Lesson 6: Be playful. You don’t have to be serious 24/7. Make effective use of body language by using eye contact, touch, smiling, etc.Position your posture in such a way that you appear comfortable but not slouching. Engage him in fun activities sometimes. Show him what you enjoy doing/try to learn what he enjoys as well. I remember when I first took my sugar daddy to a rave. He was soooo out of place with his expensive ass suit but we had such a good laugh. It was fun. It is also okay to flirt and tease but do not over do it. . If he tells you of his former beauty queen ex wife who divorced him, took half his wealth, and got full custody of the kids, it will NOT be a good time to start flirting then or batting your eye lashes. The key is to know when to be playful and when to engage in a serious conversation with him.

Lesson 7: Stroke his ego occasionally, especially when he’s a good boy. Let him know you enjoy his company, his time, what he gives you, etc. It’s tough to balance but you don’t want to seem like you can’t do without the lifestyle he grants you. Remember, you are accustomed to a luxurious lifestyle. Men like feeling like protectors, especially wealthy men. So stroke that big fat ego and let him think it. When he misbehaves, adjust accordingly. 

Lesson 8: If all else fails, create/channel an alter-ego. It sounds somewhat extreme but I have one. I created a whole new persona for myself. When I first started out four plus years ago, I appeared too innocent. And that was my biggest weakness. My naivete showed and definitely I was taken advantage of and cheated but I learned. FAST. Soon after, I stopped telling men I was inexperienced. I stopped allowing myself to appear innocent. I became a chameleon.The person I am with sugar daddies/ on pot dates is completely different from the girl I am at home/school/work/with friends. With these men, I am a worldly, experienced WOMAN. I am used to ultra-luxury and deserve nothing but the best. Of course at home/elsewhere, I am a girl/ nursing student who studies a bit too much, curses a bit too much, enjoys being wild with friends and plans on attending medical school to become a psychiatrist. Find what works for you and channel her. We all have inner goddesses and seductresses in us. 

Lesson 9: “Be nice, be nice. Until it’s time to stop being nice…" Okay, this sounds psycho meets fatal-attraction-esque but no worries! know when to curse a  pompous, disrespectful son of a bitch out. Seriously, know when to walk away. Channel your inner Cleopatra/Bitchery and crush his ass. Do not be afraid to stomp an arrogant asshole out of existence (figuratively of course). I don’t care but no amount of money is worth being disrespected. If you allow a man to disrespect and treat you like a common commodity, he will not stick around for long. He will use, abuse, and break you. And frankly, You DO NOT deserve that. If he calls you a racial slur ( and claims it’s a joke, LIES), forces himself on you, disrespects you in anyway hurtful and dehumanizing, among other things, WALK THE FUCK AWAY and report the incident to authorities if the action warrants it. And let your middle finger do the rest of the talking. 

**All in all, I hope this helps someone out here. Remember, what works for one person make not work for you. But you can still learn from others around you** And that my friends, is the most important lesson of all.

xoxo

M

[thecodeddddd]

✨Hoe tips #1 -✨💆🏻

Hope you like my first hoe tips and beauty tips thread! These pearls of wisdom really help me a lot. Let me know what you think.

-💗 COCONUT OIL WILL TURN YOUR HAIR INTO SILK leave on overnight or if u don’t have time use a hairdryer to heat ur hair for 10 minutes for the oil to sink in. Wash with shampoo to make sure the oil is out and enjoy ur beautiful hair

-💗 tie your hair before you sleep and during sex, preferably in a ponytail or a very loose and low bun, if its damaged and tangles/frizzes easily in bed. Trust me this has saved my hair from breaking apart

-💗 chuck out ur foam and shave ur coochie with baby oil hell shave ur whole body with this beautiful oil just be careful not to apply it too close to the vaginal opening as u should only wash that area with water or a feminine wash

-💗 bicarbonate of soda or COFFEE granules are cheap easy and natural face scrubs/masks and will leave ur skin baby soft

-💗 for acne - sudocrem, witch hazel oil, tea tree oil are all cheap and effective

-💗 honey, lemon juice and olive oil mask for acne scars use everyday or every other day for half an hour and keep it up for a few months

-💗 don’t use coconut oil to moisturise ur face it has been proved it blocks ur pores which can cause acne

-💗 always leave spare clean panties, leggings/trackies and a top in ur car so if u stay round someone’s place u can sleep and chill comfortably n keep sexy underwear with u in ur bag just incase

-💗 a cup of apple cider vinegar in your bath will restore ur coochie’s pH to its normal state so less discomfort for u ☺️

-💗 for soft baby feet, pumice the dry heels then coat them with Vaseline and put clean socks over before u sleep and ur bae will be wanting to stroke them all day

-💗if ur into guys, carry condoms in ur purse at all times; don’t expect them to provide them all the time because truth is they don’t always n u don’t wanna be in that position where ur risking ur sexual health

-💗 combo of double wear foundation n urban decay all nighter setting spray is sex proof

-💗 coconut oil is good natural lube for giving head to guys , and the taste is good too.

More to come! ❤️