thedadsquad - Tumblr blog

[thedadsquad]

“I have a feeling you’re going to regret that at some point, you realize that, right?”

"I'm not gonna start making smart decision at this point in my life."

[thedadsquad]

JEFFREY DEAN MORGAN san diego comic-con, 2019

[thedadsquad]

[text] Who in their right mind took the four of you to a church knowing damn good and well who your mama is?

[text] Miss Danni’s getting real good at drawing, just like her mama and big brother Jack!

[text] Don’t you worry, JackOLanturn, ol’ Dave is on his way to save the day, just sit tight.

[text] I don’t think so, but I’d not be surprised if they found a way.

@thedadsquad​

[Text:] …we need to be picked up. 

[Text:] <file attached>

[Text:] Between this and causing a spontaneous fire in the church kitchen cos they tried to put all three of us cursed McGarretts on kitchen duty….

[Text:] can we be excommunicated from a church we don’t go to? 

[thedadsquad]

Jamison smiled softly over his coffee cup, his expression fond as he listened to Steve talk.

“The way you survive it is by remembering that a lot of the time their anger is not at you but at the situation. I still remember feeling gutted the first time Andie yelled at me because I told her she wasn’t allowed to go to an art expo by herself.” He sighed and leaned back in his chair.

“She knew the why, and she understood it, but it still upset her and in that moment that was just how it came out. I’m not ashamed to admit that I cried a little after she stormed off, because fuck, that was like a stab to the heart after having that girl be all smiles for me her whole life.”

“I remember, far too clearly, being angry at my own dad! I remember the rage and and…the thoughts I had. I know I did stupid shit but…” Steve struggled with his words because even despite now having a better understanding his father as a father…he still couldn’t openly bad mouth him completely. “I want to be better than my dad. To do that, sometimes I can’t be their friend.”

“But them being angry with me…I don’t know how to survive that.”  

[thedadsquad]

She ran her fingers through his hair and kissed him once more, staring at him with all the love in the world, "I can't wait to carry your baby. Bring them into the world...embarrass them with just how much I love you. Cos this is never gonna go away, sailor. But until your boys scare off my aunt flo for nine months...we just have to keep practicing...and practicing...and practicing....and hope we don't get arrested for public indecency again."

“Practice does make perfect,” Jacob mused, grinning as he looked at Clarissa with pure adoration. “What do you say we get our haul here and get the hell outta doge, find some place out of the way where we can get to work on making that sweet baby of ours?”

[thedadsquad]

Clarissa bit her lip and tried to stifle the squeal of delight. She groped her husband now that she was within reach of him and smirked, "One of the dangers of being married, Daddy...all of this is with the permission and encouragement of God in some way." She kissed him tenderly then, "The aftercare you give is one of the reasons I know I chose right when I chose you."

Jacob couldn’t help but groan softly, tossing aside the broom and wrapping and arm around Clarissa’s waist as he returned the kiss. “Naughty girl,” he sighed, nuzzling his wife gently. “You know, one of these days we’re gonna have kids and they’re gonna be so grossed out by us and how lovey we are? I’m looking forward to seeing you be a mama though.”

[thedadsquad]

Clarissa bit her lip, eyes zeroing in on the effect this was having on him. She reached for one of the decorative witch's broom and stepped up her own game. Grabbing the broom by the bush side, she traced the outline of his growing boner and said, "And how far do you'd think we'd get before your need takes over...Daddy?"

Jacob closed his eyes and took a deep breath, letting it out slowly as his wicked wife teased him.

“To Sheila’s backseat, at least,” he said, giving Clarissa a pointed look as he opened his eyes and grabbed the broom to tug her closer. “Just make sure you’re prepared for the aftermath, Mrs. Thomas, because I won’t be going easy on you.”

[thedadsquad]

Clarissa smirked, crossing her own arms and looking at Jacob with mirth but also with a challenge. "Who said that's what I expected? I threw down the gauntlet...what are you gonna do about it, Daddy?" "

Jacob cleared his throat, shifting a little. The words definitely had an effect, how could they not? Still, a challenge was issued and he be damned if he was gonna just throw in the towel just because of the stirrings of a boner.

“You’re pushing the boundary line, baby girl,” he said, amusement coloring his voice as he looked down at his wife. “You realize I could just haul you over my shoulder like a sack of potatoes and carry you outta here?”

[thedadsquad]

“Will you buy this for me?”

“-not even really paying much attention, shuffling through stuff- Sure, whatever you want.”

“Thank you, Daddy!”

(Clarissa to Jacob...but feel free to ignore. I just...I was thinking about them and I was curious about how Jacob would react.)

It was a damn good thing Jacob wasn’t holding anything breakable when his wife popped off with that devious little line, his eyes snapping to her in shock before they narrowed.

“Now you wait just a minute, you little Firecracker, what makes you think I’m gonna let you go gettin’ away with that in public?” He asked, crossing his arms and raising an eyebrow at her.

[thedadsquad]

codenamepinetree​:

“We’ve walked into a room together before, so I don’t know how much of a kitchen will be needed or if it’s close proximity to a cooking appliance, but I’m down. I could never explain why I can’t cook. My palate is very refined if I do say so myself. In theory, I know how it’s all done. But in practice…it never goes right.” 

“Maybe you are biased, but you’re not wrong about Andie. She understands us but also have the compassion balanced with the snarky wit that makes it so we don’t feel patronized. There’s a balance of chaos…”

“I was mute as a child. I also knew I was different. Very different. I stumbled into art in an attempt to understand human emotions. It became a way of communicating for me that Andie is one of the few who gets it. She helps dad understand me sometimes when it’s hard to find the words. She’s special that one. Dad knows it. I know it. And we’ll make sure her honor is defended against any evil trolls.” 

“We’ve built kitchen sets for the sake of experimentation before, it won’t be too difficult,” Jacob replied, grinning at Jack. “You’ll like Claire’s cooking, she grew up in New Orleans and has a ton of family recipes. See, we have a story behind ours but we’re not sure if it’s just a story or actually true. In any case, Andie was the first girl born into the Thomas family in four generations so we thought sure it would skip her. No such luck there.”

Jacob listened intently as Jack spoke, remember Andie’s talks with Clarissa on how to approach things with Jack because she was concerned about saying or doing the wrong thing. “Most of what I know about art I learned because of Claire and Andie. Andie had a tough time with school, between constantly moving due to me being stationed in different places, and also some trouble with dyscalculia, which made things like math hell for her. Art brought her peace, so it makes sense that she was able to see that in you as well. I’m glad she has the two of you.”

[thedadsquad]

codenamepinetree​:

“I’m getting used to a lot of things. But the squad is preferable. Mostly because dad will have some help in the cooking area. Danny helps, and there’s always Kame for delivery in a pinch…but I think whatever cooking curse I inherited, might have been similar to yours and Andie’s. One day we both just walked into the kitchen at the same time, different doors, and the toaster spontaneously combusted. It wasn’t even plugged in.”

“Oh, she has more than me in her corner for that fight. In the end, we all want the same thing. My dad’s actual genuine happiness and not the outdated version that used to be the ‘good enough standard’. And in that regard, Andie’s the perfect match…no way she who shall not be named could ever compare to be my dad’s wife or someone I make a mother’s day gift for.” 

“Now that’s impressive. Toaster combustion and all you two had to do was walk through different doors? You know, we may have to go out to the range and see if we can recreate that cause I can promise you the rest of the Squad will wanna see that in action.”

Originally posted by alice-in-every-land-blog

“I’m glad to hear it. You and your dad both deserve someone who is going to be there for you and I know that our Duckie can do that. I may sound biased but she’s grown into a very special woman. She’s been through her own hard times, and I’m grateful for the man your dad is and for the young man you are. You both support her and help her feel loved the way she needs, so thank you for that.”

[thedadsquad]

“You’ll get used to it after a while, especially with the whole Squad coming around. I’m trying to see if I can talk Claire Bear into moving out here, it’d be good for our retirement and let us be closer to Andie and you guys.”

“I see. Well, Andie definitely enjoys her time with both of you, there’s no doubt about that. Knowing her the way I do, I think she can withstand Doris just fine. Still, I’m sure having you in her corner will help immensely, whatever you decide to do.”

sassandsnapshots​:

“A rabid mongoose is more likable than Doris,” Jacob said cheerfully, taking a sip of his drink. “Good for you, being prepared. Andie said you were a sharp kid, she was definitely right about you. Oof, that’s no good.”

Originally posted by jumpingpuddles

“Of course! We love coming to visit, you guys are family now and we make time for family. As for all the Mommy Issues, just keep communicating with people and you’ll make it through alright.”

“Mmm,” Jack agreed. “It’s not always possible but I’m not one to be in denial about what’s in front of me. What is new is having others to care for. It’s weird…but a nice kind of weird.” 

“Well, because of my own I think dad’s trying to actually tackle his and not just avoid them or pretend they’re not there. And Andie helps. Both of us. I don’t want to…assume. Jump the gun as I’ve been told we McGarretts are known to. But she does motherly stuff for me. It’s kind of a tight rope…but we’re walking it. We’re lucky to have her in our lives. And I’m not going to let Doris ruin the good we got. Take that in comfort or concern.” 

[thedadsquad]

.

“She does have a temper, despite her Saint level patience after chasing seven SEALs and a Mini SEAL. Though to be fair, your grandmother brought it on herself. Thanks for the drink, kid,” Jacob said, chuckling softly. “Neither, she’s a fan of the right cross. It’s quite fun to watch her work.”

@thedadsquad​ for Jacob

“Your wife’s about one or two comments away from punching my grandmother. So one, brought you a drink cos…I don’t know. I’m shit at socializing. But getting their guests drinks is what hosts do, right? Two…will she go for the haymaker or upper cut?” 

[thedadsquad]

"Hey JamJam, I might be heading to Hawaii a little earlier to help with some cooking. Steve's in charge of distracting Daniel, but we know how strong that Thomas Cooking Curse is in Andie. Also, my mother's intuition's picking up on something but I have to tone down my enthusiasm. She really is her father's daughter, that one..."

"My insurance company definitely remembers, as does my kitchen," Jamison said, chuckling. "Oh really? Well, let's see, they're already married, she just had the Hawaii gallery opening earlier this year, and Steve's not about to go back to active duty with how well the task force is doing so...there's only one thing left it could be, but I'll keep my thoughts to myself for now."

[thedadsquad]

"I hope you can clear up some time in the not-so-distant future for a Hawaiian wedding, hun," Clarissa said into the phone. From where she was calling Jamison she could see Jacob help Andie organize the pictures she's taken into an album they got her at the Walgreens they printed some of the pictures she's taken. They were almost on their way home and she wanted something ready to show whoever was there to pick them up.

"Andie got one look at the apparent girlfriend of the SEAL who found her and...I hate to say ruined, but she uh...well, bless her, she brought on the chaos and effectively broke up a couple, but got the SEAL to propose to his detective. All in all...it's been a hell of a holiday."

Jamison actually stopped what he was doing and looked at the phone, blinking in surprise before answering. "Our Baby Bear broke up a couple? Andie? I mean, congrats to the SEAL and his detective but she's seven, how does she even know how to do that?"

Really he shouldn't be surprised, this was the mini SEAL they were talking about. Still, Andie breaking up a whole ass relationship only to cause a proposal? Now he really had seen it all.

[thedadsquad]

raw lines from unlikely sources … sentence starters 

“Then perish.”

“And still, I survive.”

“Pick a god and pray.”

“Despite everything, its still you.”

“Confidence is quiet. You’re not.”

“Then become the dirt I walk on.“

“I am a monument to all your sins.“

“Hell is empty, all the devils are here.“

“You said I killed you. Haunt me, then!”

“Do I look like the kind of man who dies?“

“You cannot kill me in a way that matters.“

“Violence for violence is the rule of beasts.“

“If you want me to die, you can just say so.“

“Your secrets are safe with my indifference.“

“Will you fight? Or will you perish like a dog?”

“You will survive. It will hurt, but you will live.”

“I will face God and walk backwards into hell.“

“I have been through hell and come out singing.”

“I haven’t been a kid since I was eight years old.”

“You are strong, child. But I am beyond strength.“

“I cannot hold back the tide of your bad decisions.“

“What an exhausting thing it is to be called a hero.“

“You cannot condemn those who build your throne.“

“To become God is the loneliest achievement of all.“

“Pay a man enough, and he’ll walk barefoot into Hell.“

“No cause is lost as long as one fool is left to fight for it.“

“You kneel before my throne, unaware it was built on lies.“

“If God wanted you to live, he would not have created me.“

“Love is like ghosts; Few have seen it, but everybody talks.”

“I had all and then most of you, some and now none of you.”

“No one will know the violence it took to become this gentle.“

“I hope you heal from the things no one ever apologized for.“

“My ancestors are smiling on me… Can yours say the same?“

“God has cursed me for my hubris and my work is never finished.“

“There’s no point in being grown up if you can’t act childish at times.“

“You could sooner divert a river from its course than deny my nature.“

“Kill me and live with the memory. Then tell the stars that you’ve won.“

“I will seize destiny by the throat and force it into the shape of my choosing.“

“If the world chooses to become my enemy, I will fight just like I always have.“

“The anger in your heart warms you now, but will leave you cold in your grave.“

“I survived because the fire inside me burned brighter than the fire around me.“

“Do you think God lives in heaven because he, too, fears what he has created?“

“Someday you will have to answer for your actions, and god may not be so merciful.”

“So you think you’re the only one struggling, when in fact, everyone goes through it.“

“You are alone, child. There is only darkness for you, and only death for your people.”

“Dude, sucking at something is the first step towards being sort of good at something.”

“You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.“

“What is better? To be born good, or to overcome your evil nature through great effort?”

“I am not responsible for actions of the imaginary version of me you have inside your head.“

“I think we deserve a soft epilogue, my love. We are good people and we’ve suffered enough.“

“They dropped the world on your shoulders and called you Atlas. How long can you hold the weight?”

“If we want the rewards of being loved, we have to submit to the mortifying ordeal of being known.”

“You see, there’s no need to wonder where your god is, ‘cause he’s right here! And he’s fresh out of mercy.“

“The bar was so low it was practically an tripping hazard in hell, yet here you are, limbo dancing with the devil.”

“Stand in the ashes of a trillion dead souls and ask the ghosts if honor matters. Their silence is your answer.“

“The world should have protected you, but you have been asked to protect it. What an honor. What an injustice.“

“What can one do in the face of such monumental loss but breathe a weary sigh, for the world is a little quieter now?”

“You’ve got to make a statement. You’ve got to look inside yourself and say: ‘what am I willing to put up with today?’“

“I see now that the circumstances of one’s birth are irrelevant; it is what you do with the gift of life that determines who you are.“

“Too many people have opinions on things they know nothing about. And the more ignorant they are, the more opinions they have.“

“Always remember that the crowd that applauds your coronation is the same crowd that will applaud your beheading. People like a show.“

“One day, you will be face to face with whatever saw fit to let you exist in the universe… and you will have to justify the space you’ve filled.”

[thedadsquad]

Steve was happy to hear that. And it seemed like they were a very happy and genuinely in love as a couple. At the mention of the leash, he replied with, "Don't give him any ideas."

"You couldn't handle me if I were in a place to put you in a leash in the fun way," Danny told Steve before telling Jacob, "Stereotypical but it never hurts to pick up more chores around the house, her favorite sweets, flowers, and a night out dancing. Though uh...make sure you have a reliable sitter."

"We know a guy with connections to a lot of fun family stuff to do on the island. If not free then for a discount, to make it up to your wife and hopefully smooth out the rest of your vacation." Steve offered.

Jacob snorted, giving the two men a grin. “Oh, this ain’t my first rodeo, gentlemen. I’m very lucky in that my sweet Southern Belle has a lot of patience with me, though I do plan to make it up to both my girls. My platoon isn’t gonna let me live this one down though, retrieving the wrong kid and losing mine.”

“We’d appreciate that greatly, thank you. Also, I’d like to treat you guys to dinner as a thank you for helping us out. It’s the least I can do for causing you so much trouble.”

@doctor-sailor-investigator