thedasphiliasociety

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[thedasphiliasociety]

Thoughts on Cullen and Blackwall’s Redemptions…

My issue with Blackwall’s redemption arc isn’t that it failed to redeem him. It didn’t fail. It’s that people say it was a better one or state that it’s a “true” redemption arc when compared to Cullen’s. Redemption comes in several forms, but the goal is the same: the person turns from a wrong to a right and atones (pays the price). A vast oversimplification, I realize, but we’ll stick with it.

Ultimately, Blackwall (Thom) goes to face the consequences of his actions by taking the place of one of his soldiers and confesses to his wrongdoings and lies. Instead of dying, he can face judgment by the Inquisitor and can continue to serve the Inquisition or later become a Warden. His atonement is a life of service.

That doesn’t negate the wrongness of his lie. Deceit is deceit. It doesn’t matter the intention. Blackwall lying about being a Warden in order to do good and inspire good in others was not “wrong” in its intent—on a surface level.

The path to hell is paved by good intentions.

Both Cullen and Thom are guilty of paving that road. But what they paved it with and how are vastly different things.

Blackwall was intentionally deceiving. And did so in order to escape the consequences of his actions. Sure, he may not have known the secrets of the Warden Order and thought he was doing right by pretending to be good. But his lies could’ve gotten people killed. Tainted. But that’s besides the point.

My issue with Thom is that he knowingly did wrong in leading his men, unbeknownst to them, to murder a general loyal to Celene (whom Thom’s own men were loyal to) which led to the murder of his entire family and then knowingly continued to do wrong by assuming someone else’s identity in order to escape accountability.

His initial wrong was deceit. He continued in that deceit. And he only stopped when he finally felt guilty enough about it. In one case, that’s after taking the Inquisitor to bed knowing she doesn’t even know who she’s having sex with. In the other, it’s because he feels the Inquisitor’s example finally taught him what it means to live by and uphold right actions.

I’m not going to touch the first because that’s a betrayal of a whole different kind in my book. But the second? Personally, I find it to be a load of crap. He knew the moment those children were present he should’ve called his men to stop. He didn’t. And even in his jail cell he makes excuses about that being “the nature of war” before admitting himself it was senseless violence done for no more than a payoff.

How many of his men died before his second-in-command was to meet the noose? Only some of them escaped per the report we read before going to Val Royeaux. Those who didn’t escape took the fall for him. His second-in-command’s hanging wasn’t the first, so no claiming that his men’s lives being at risk caused him to own up to his actions. He ran and left those who couldn’t to die. And he kept running. Until he got an offer from a Grey Warden. That Warden died saving his life. Thom saw his opportunity to leave his past behind without consequences and took it. Hid like a coward.

Deceit, greed and murder were his wrongs. Opportunism and cowardice his paving stones. Did he do “good” as Blackwall? Sure, but it was tainted. It wasn’t out of a genuine desire to do good, but to keep running. At least at first.

Then, he becomes part of the Inquisition. Where time and again he is faced with people choosing to do the right thing for the sake of doing good. Not all of them, mind you, but most of them. And slowly, little by little, his conscience eats away at him. His conscience that he ignored time and again since that dog he let strangle to death as a boy. Then he gets the report about one of his men.

Finally, he acts.

And not for himself—perhaps for the first time in his life. He goes to lay down his life for his second-in-command who was only guilty of following orders that he believed were leading to defending the greater good of his nation.

Guilt was the crossroads and self-sacrifice the atonement. He was finally willing to take the full responsibility of his actions.

And the only way he is saved from that justice is by the Inquisition implicating and corrupting itself via an abuse of power and influence.

No different than when Cassandra offered the position of commander to Cullen.

She set aside his wrongdoings as knight-captain in order to give him a second chance to atone because she saw the good man that he was in his mutiny of Meredith and his actions following as acting knight-commander. That said, Cullen’s wrongs are more in line with Thom’s second-in-command. He was a loyal templar following orders for what he believed to be the greater good. Meredith hid things from him. Manipulated him. The Order and the Chantry did the same. It is no wonder he despises Thom for what he did.

The difference between Mornay and Cullen is that Cullen understood something was wrong before he pulled his sword on Meredith. He had already begun to sense it. Had done so in Origins before Uldred. But even in Kirkwall, he interceded on some mages’ behalf in order to stop worser punishments when Hawke asked him to. Possibly fought side by side an apostate mage Hawke to defeat Meredith. And then when his commander went too far, he stood his ground and said no. He spoke up for the mages that begged for their lives. Pointed out that the Annulment in full was not warranted, that the innocent mages could be spared. Disobeyed Meredith to get them to safety or refused to raise his sword to them. And finally demanded Meredith step down when she grasped for power beyond her purview. His wrongs were committed under the influence of anger and fear, not greed. And he acts because he knows it’s the right thing to do, not out of guilt.

His paving stones were trauma, anger, fear. He was the victim of indoctrination and manipulation. Not excuses, but explanations for his wrongs of blind obedience, sanctimony and bigotry. Genuine belief (in the Maker, in what it meant to be a templar, etc.) was the crossroads.

And then he joins the Inquisition—an organization meant to challenge the system of the Chantry, Order and Circles before Corypheus came on the scene—in order to atone. He quits lyrium. He works with mages, including apostates. Possibly falls in love with one.

All the while he is honest about who he is and what he’s done. He doesn’t hide. He feels guilt for what he did (per Cole’s “they didn’t hang you there, you can walk away”), but it’s not what drives him to act.

Repentance is what drives him. Regret. Remorse. Shame at what he let himself become. And he knows the only way to atone is through honesty and action.

This discussion could go on forever. There are many parallels between the two men. But the difference is that Thom is the one who gave the orders where Cullen was the one who followed them.

Thom should’ve stopped his men the moment that general’s family was present. He didn’t. But then he owned up to what he did to spare one of the men he damned through his greed and deceit. Cullen might have wanted mages locked up as much as Meredith did, might have dehumanized them, but he would only go so far and never personally harmed his charges. Little by little he began to see that the whispers about Meredith and the Gallows were not lies. Saw the fear in the mages’ eyes. Then, he committed insubordination by speaking out against Meredith and later mutinied her when she went too far.

In the end, are both men redeemed? I believe so.

One man found redemption by willingly asking himself if he was wrong and acting at the eleventh hour. He lost his way, thought he was doing what was right, only to realize he was wrong. And then he chose to do what was right. A good man at his core who allowed anger to lead him astray. He did his best to make amends amongst the Inquisition by leading soldiers and agents—regular men and women; mages and templars; apostates; dwarves; Circle, City and Dalish elves; qunari, etc—true, side by side an Inquisitor that might have been an apostate or a mage on the run. He pays the price by leaving behind the Order in every sense, serving the Inquisition and later opening a clinic to help other templars leave the Order or doing good side by side his wife.

The other acted on what was wrong time and again until his guilt finally caught up to him. He pretended to be good until he realized he actually could be. Realized he wasn’t a good man, but had been given the chance to prove that he could be. He wanted to honor that and the truly good man who gave him a second chance as well as the organization that let him live it out. He goes to sacrifice himself to spare Mornay. He’s spared that price by the Inquisition in order to continue serving and living up to that second chance.

Neither man is perfect. Both sought redemption. One’s journey played out over three games. The other over one. It doesn’t diminish either story. And just because one begged for the Inquisitor to see the man he was while he was behind bars and the other stated it calmly doesn’t make one better than the other. Both stories are good in their own ways and reflective of the man at the center of it.

We may have a preference for one over the other, but what matters is that two men who sought redemption found it.

[thedasphiliasociety]

Meeting Blackwall

[thedasphiliasociety]

no dragon age romance will ever compare to zevran arainai. he's bisexual. he was raised in a murder assassin torture cult after being raised in a brothel. he has a bunch of tattoos and even knows how to give them. he tries to murder you when you first meet him and then poses sexily afterwards. he says he's skilled at lockpicking and then never manages to pick a single lock in the entire game. he murdered his last lover after falsely believing that she betrayed the crows. he regularly slept with his marks before killing them to give them one last good night alive. when you ask him to have sex with you he says one liners like "arghhh pirate zevran reporting for duty!" he gets upset and broody when he realizes that he's in love with you after you ask him for more in your relationship. he proposes to you with an earring from a dead guy before he even tells you that he loves you. he's the only companion to almost completely stay with you after origins (besides the dlcs and parts of da2, he presumably stays with you the rest of your lives). if you die, he never gets into a relationship or has sex with anyone ever again. he constantly talks about you when he's away from you (da2). he calls the sword of the dead king of ferelden "sexy" and says that he "must have it". he's a devout andrastian. he loves being an assassin and doesn't feel bad about murdering people. you can have a threesome with him and a woman he used to sleep with and helped save from her abusive husband. he's slept with countless people and you're the first person that he's ever actually loved. he spends the rest of his life when he's not with you devoted to terrorizing the organization that abused him as a child (and adult) and killing of its leaders. when you tell him that you love him, he says that "he knows." he's blonde. and he's perfect in every way possible.

[thedasphiliasociety]

cassarric keeping me alive since 2014 💘

[thedasphiliasociety]

I *love* this.

Drabble: the one that got away

commandercurls answered your post: So, I want to write drabbles, preferra…

oH I should probably leave my prompt on here. Whoops. Okay, here it is: Cullen and Varric discussing Anders over drinks.

(I'venever written Varric before, so I’m deeply sorry if the POV is dodgy.)

Every letter from Hawke is a study in how to avoid mentioning Anders. She writes endless paragraphs – in a cramped, uneven, messy hand that requires plenty of candles and patience to decipher – about their time in Kirkwall, about Bethany, Aveline and Isabela and about weird shit she eats and drinks as she travels. She doesn’t mention Anders. Still, it’s the first thing Curly asks as they sit down in the tavern after Adamant. Asks it in a tone that suggests that he’s been itching to get it off his chest and now that he has he can relax in his posture, sink back in his seat and take a sip of his ale. “Did she say anything about his whereabouts?” Varric has to laugh at that, a dry, hard laugh high in his throat. It doesn’t taste like laughter. “Sure, why not? Go help the Inquisition that’s been hunting your ass for years, break a few ribs, get stuck in the Fade, tell the templars where your apostate lover hangs out these days. Sounds just like Hawke.” Curly shakes his head. “I didn’t mean-” “She’s going to Weisshaupt,” he interrupts and that part of him that had wanted to go with her still protests at the mere notion. “I’m sure Anders will reunite with her along the way unless he’s killed. Maybe it isn’t obvious to you, but not a lot of people want him alive.” They drink in silence for a few beats, surrounded by Maryden’s latest song and the soldiers’ chatter. Varric feels an old ache in his chest as he thinks of Anders because Anders is Kirkwall and the Hanged Man; he’s Bartrand and his sodding schemes; he’s Isabela’s drunken rants up in his quarters and Hawke’s gentle snoring as he tucks her in that night after they’ve returned from the Deep Roads and she drinks until she cries and then cries until she chokes on her tears. Anders is Kirkwall and Kirkwall is home. People want revenge and Varric doesn’t blame them. But he will use every mean he has to make sure nobody succeeds because it would break Hawke and that would be worse than breaking the city of chains. When he tells Curly, the man simply nods. “I have already assigned a small troop to accompany her on the journey,” he says and for the first time since the Seeker dragged him into this mess, Varric feels like he’s actually part of it. He nods, emptying his tankard. “I’ll go easy on you next time we play Wicked Grace.” Cullen snorts but there’s a smile there, somewhere.

[thedasphiliasociety]

Solas progress update~

Am i procrastinating drawing the armor??? Most definitely...

[thedasphiliasociety]

Doubt thou the stars are fire; Doubt that the sun doth move; Doubt truth to be a liar; But never doubt I love.

[thedasphiliasociety]

Be still my heart...

[thedasphiliasociety]

Imagining Blackwall getting jealous every time someone calls the Inquisitior ‘my lady’. She’s not their lady, she’s his lady.

[thedasphiliasociety]

i spend a lot of time thinking about my hawke and cullen in skyhold together

[thedasphiliasociety]

[thedasphiliasociety]

Praise the Maker for Blackwall’s romance tarot card

[thedasphiliasociety]

anyway dai solas you will always be famous to me. nothing but respect for my boy who wandered off mid-cutscene in the hinterlands to go help out refugees, is extremely good at Lies Of Omission™️, has a whole spy/agent/informant network of elves who followed him, fervently argues that it's unethical to be happy about killing bandits bc they had lives and loved ones, describes his own temple(?) prison(?) as having "indecipherable" elven writing, has ferocious debates with dorian and iron bull about slavery, set himself on fire once by mistake, and within about a year of his 10000 year lifespan, went from seeing all the world as disposable emotionless husks, to developing actual friendships and even falling in love.

and then! still thought it was necessary to destroy and reset the world! but he would treasure the chance to be wrong again!!

[thedasphiliasociety]

"I thought maybe I could say something. Tell you what a rare and wonderful thing you are to find amidst all this... darkness."

[thedasphiliasociety]

cowboy crow

sequel to my cowboy alistair had to be zev lol

prints here!

[thedasphiliasociety]

Good god, imagine how solas was with romanced lavellan fighting and getting downed in inquisition

Like. People die. That's what they do. Yeah okay hon tell me that when you're constantly keeping an eye on her back, watching as she practically falls into the role of Inquisitor, a role you've orchestrated for her, and nearly dies On The Daily

He purposely creates that distance, only to see it dwindle inch by inch, near death by near death, until that one day she hits the ground and he is flying across the battlefield to destroy whatever dealt the last blow, dropping to his knees and scooping her up like dust in his palms.

But then she's blinking up at him, bloodied and wincing but alive and he all but melts. But it hits him differently, right then, how very delicate these creatures are. He knew, of course, in a practical sense. But he hadn't been in it.

He's fought beings beyond even the comprehension of these people. She is a blink, a breath, a weave in the tapestry of his existence, but if she were to be torn or pulled from him he would unravel and that is terrifying

Anyway yeah, ancient being who is acquainted with mortality and then is forced to know it intimately through adoration is uh. It's pretty cool I guess