thedoubleztv

[thedoubleztv]

Well, it looks like the false copyright strike issue has returned after 3 1/2 months of silence.

[thedoubleztv]

MarkScan Enforcement is stalking me.

It's been 2 months since this issue arose, following 4 1/2 years of peace and quiet (in terms of my experience). However, the MarkScan issue hasn't stopped since it began on December 8th and I'm 100% convinced that I'm being stalked.

Between December 8, 2024 and February 7, 2025, I've received 6 DMCA takedown notices on my Twitter/X account from MarkScan Enforcement.

Now you may be reading that and be thinking, "Are you sure that you're being stalked by this company?" And to that I say, yes. I'll do my best to give info on each strike, the timing, and why I'm still suspicious of this company.

Strike 1: December 8, 2024 at 7:56 pm EST.

I got a strike 1-2 months after I shared a screen recording of myself obtaining a shiny Meloetta in Pokemon Home because MSE said the sound recording/audio is owned by AFK Creators (the strike also names Universal Music Group). Thought it was a valid claim, so I just let it go.

Strike 2: December 10, 2024 at 6:25 am EST.

Got a strike 2 days after posting a still image and brief clip from a Pure Pro Wrestling event that happened on December 7th, with the material being filmed with my own equipment. I contacted the owner of Pure Pro Wrestling and he doesn't know anything about this. Doesn't know who MarkScan is, what they do, or how they're able to file takedowns on behalf of his organization.

Strike 3: December 10, 2024 at 9:16 pm EST.

Got a strike from a reply tweet to WrestleClips, where he asked "Who has that one Shawn Michaels video?" I replied with "Sure, why not?" in the tweet and a clip with Shawn Michaels. Somehow, MarkScan claims this violates Pure Pro Wrestling's copyright, despite it being World Wrestling Entertainment's property. Filed an appeal and the strike was overturned on December 24, 2024 at 8:20 pm EST due to MarkScan not responding to the appeal with legal action (which they'd have to do if they felt that I had committed copyright infringement) within 10-14 business days. But then...

Strike 4: December 24, 2024 at 9:56 pm EST.

After a couple of days of having my account on Public and an hour and a half after the 3rd strike was appealed successfully, I got a new strike. MarkScan struck down the image that I posted at on December 7, 2024 at 5:44 pm EST of the wrestling ring, prior to that evening's Pure Pro Wrestling event and the notice claims that I was sharing "match footage" in a still image. This was before 6 pm, which was around the time that the pre-show began and the main show happened at 7 pm. There was no "match footage" to share when nothing was happening in the ring. Filed an appeal and the appeal went through on January 7, 2025 at 8:30 pm EST following silence by MarkScan towards my appeal.

Strike 5: January 30, 2025 at 3:43 pm EST.

Posted a clip of Randy Orton's RKO to Seth Rollins at Wrestlemania 31 around 9 am on January 29th and it was gone about 31 hours later. Once again, MSE claims it's on behalf of Pure Pro Wrestling, despite this clip being owned by WWE. Filed an appeal and it's still pending, as of this post.

Strike 6: February 7, 2025 at 9:29 am EST.

Posted an image from WWE's website (which I found in a Google search) from the Becky/Charlotte segment where they needed to trade titles in a reply tweet on February 4th. And yet again, MSE claims PPW copyright infringement on material that's owned by WWE. Filed an appeal, still awaiting on a response/result.

By this point, I'm beyond frustrated. 6 strikes in 2 months, 5 of the 6 claiming to be on behalf of Pure Pro Wrestling, 3 of the 6 being material owned by WWE, 2 appeals have successfully gone through and 2 are pending.

I've emailed this company 9 times, not even one response has been received. I've even filed a complaint to the Federal Trade Commission (FTC) over this because this is ridiculous. I'm being harassed, stalked, and targeted with fraudulent DMCA takedown notices by this company in India. The fact that I can't even post an IMAGE on Twitter without an issue is ridiculous, as well as the fact that I'm the only one in the Internet Wrestling Community (IWC) to be penalized for posting WWE material, while others do it daily with higher follower counts and not have this issue.

But now, why do I suspect that this company is stalking my account? I'll break it down as best as I can.

In each of their emails, they claim that the piece of material was found through their "monitor program".

"Through our monitor program, we have become aware that you are displaying and/or offering the Pure Pro Wrestling’s copyright protected visual/image content through the following URL(s):"

It's been unclear as to whether this program is automated to find material or if someone has to be manually finding this material. Either way, something is fishy when you think about what I said a bit ago about myself being the only wrestling fan account on Twitter that's having this problem. So, I wanted to put this "monitor program" to the test.

I took the exact video clip from the 5th strike (the Wrestlemania 31 RKO) and uploaded it to my other 2 Twitter accounts, one being public and the other being private. I posted the video to the private account to see if it could be found and the public account to see if it'll quickly be found and removed.

Those accounts had the video posted to both accounts on February 4th and as of this post, they're STILL available on both accounts.

If their program was automatic, it should've easily picked up the exact same clip that they took down from my main account, being directly re-uploaded to my other accounts with similar captions in the tweets. If the video was also quickly removed from my other public account, I would've suspected an automated system that was flawed (if they claimed it was on behalf of PPW again while targeting a different account) and being unfair with who is punished, as mentioned before about nobody else being hit by this company.

The fact that MarkScan won't respond to emails and are constantly choosing to single me out is beyond bizarre. The tweet from the 5th strike only had 48 views when I took a screenshot of the tweet (which was 7 1/2 hours after the strike was applied) with no engagement from anybody. No likes, comments, retweets, nothing.

So MarkScan, y'all have some explaining to do on this one. How can you takedown material that's owned by WWE and claim that it violates Pure Pro Wrestling's copyright when neither company is associated with each other? How can you claim that PPW is a client of yours if the owner doesn't know who you are? How can PPW be a client of yours if there's no publicly accessible Letter of Authorization to prove it compared to other ones from your website that indicate working relationships with other companies? Why do you refuse to explain yourselves when I email you about this ongoing problem? And why are you stalking me to the point where I can't feel safe on Twitter anymore?

I found it odd how my account was fine during the 2 periods where I had my account on private, so it leads me to believe that it's the only way to protect my account. But at the same time, I don't like having to do that. Not easy to grow a social media account when you have to hide its visibility under any circumstance.

Ishita Singh, COO of MarkScan, you might want to stop stalking me and committing fraud with these false takedowns. You're not making yourself or the company look good when you file false takedowns and refuse to answer emails, which demand an explanation for your actions.

[thedoubleztv]

The MarkScan Enforcement Chronicles

"It's Groundhog Day...again."

The following post will be covering a subject that has been seriously affecting myself and my time on social media platforms, primarily YouTube and Twitter. This post will be talking about the history I've been dealing with involving MarkScan AKA MarkScan Enforcement.

For those who may or may not know, I owned the original DoubleZWWE channel that had over 1 million subscribers almost 5 years ago (and I own the current DoubleZWWE channel that has 71k subscribers as of this posting). That channel took a lot of daily uploading grinding in order to get that channel to where it was, which was tough to keep up with in terms of an upload schedule.

On April 5, 2020, I received an email for my DoubleZWWE channel and it had stated that I was being hit with a copyright strike/DMCA Takedown notice for WWE content on the channel. I hadn't gotten a copyright strike on the channel in a while and this took me by surprise. Within 2 hours of that email, the channel was gone after getting more strikes for the exact same reasons from the exact same company. By the end of it all, I had been issued 22 copyright strikes from MarkScan Enforcement and my channel with 1.2+ million subscribers had been wiped out.

I tried to email the company through the email address that was provided in the takedowns on a handful of occasions, but never received a response to any of the emails. I tried to file a counter-notice for the strikes because I believed that an error had been made, only for YouTube to refuse to forward the counter-notice because I hadn't proven that I had the rights to post that content to YouTube. If WWE didn't have an issue with the content at that point, then why did MarkScan Enforcement suddenly make a judgment call on this?

As time went along, I noticed other WWE fan channels disappear (some were gone before my channel was terminated, but a lot happened afterwards). ThatDamnGood, Tyler Desjardins, Sablelicious, Riot, and more. The company was going after individual channels and issuing takedowns until these channels were gone, one by one. To this day, none of us have ever gotten a response from MarkScan Enforcement in regards to this wave of takedowns for WWE content from 2020, but we have our theories as to what was going on behind the scenes.

As a result of DoubleZWWE being removed, I also lost both TheDoubleZTV and TheDoubleZTV Gaming for "being linked to a channel terminated for copyright strikes", which made no sense. I had 2 other channels at that point (WWEIsWar and Zunigaistheman, the latter of the 2 is still up to this day) and they weren't affected, yet the 2 channels that were terminated with DoubleZWWE were the only channels that I had that were monetized. This was during the early period of the COVID-19 pandemic and YouTube stated that things were slow in terms of operations due to the pandemic, yet they were functioning well enough to takedown 2 of my other channels less than 24 hours after DoubleZWWE was wiped out.

I lost so many original videos from my original TheDoubleZTV channel in the nearly 8 years that the channel was around for and that still stings to this day. I've also had many people reach out to me on social media that have been targeted by MarkScan Enforcement since I was terminated, since I've pretty much been the loudest about my stance on the company itself. I've done rants on streams and individual videos, talking about this company and what happened in 2020.

And now that leads to this week.

A month or two ago, I used my phone's screen recording feature in the Pokemon Home mobile app to record my screen while I was obtaining a shiny Meloetta. This past Sunday, I received a DMCA takedown notice on Twitter for the content in that post.

Who filed the takedown? MarkScan Enforcement, who claimed it was due to the music that played from the app. They also stated the takedown was on behalf of AFK Creators, who I've never heard of before.

And then Tuesday hit and it caused my blood to really boil.

Just before 6:30 am ESt on Tuesday morning, I received another DMCA takedown notice on a post that I made around Saturday night/Sunday morning. I attended a wrestling event for a company known as Pure Pro Wrestling, which is a Michigan-based wrestling company. I've attended 24 shows now with this company and I've always had a great time I attend an event. I filmed the show like I've been doing since May of 2017 and shared 2 pieces of media from the show on my Twitter account. 1 of them was an image from the show where professional wrestler Ray Adams was posing with a trophy after a match and the other was a small clip later in the night, where Jack Kelly (who is a manager of wrestlers) made a remark towards me during his entrance with his group of wrestlers.

MarkScan Enforcement stated that on behalf of their client Pure Pro Wrestling (the DMCA takedown notice statement included the URL to the Pure Pro Wrestling website that is linked to the company mentioned here), they claimed that I was infringing on PPW's copyright and decided to takedown my post on copyright grounds. Feeling confused about this, I personally contacted Xavier Justice, who is the owner of Pure Pro Wrestling.

I've known Xavier Justice ever since I started attending these shows in April of 2016 and we've always gotten along very well since the very beginning. I have nothing but respect for him as a human being. He's known that I've filmed these full shows since May of 2017, we've even had discussions about that back in 2020.

I contacted him on Facebook to ask about this takedown notice and he informed me that he has no clue who MarkScan Enforcement is, has never heard of their organization prior to my message to him about this topic, and is confused as to how they can file a copyright claim on behalf of his company. And that's a good question. There has to be a working relationship there that involves a paid service with using MarkScan Enforcement's services and the fact that the owner of the company that MSE claims is a client of theirs has no idea who MarkScan Enforcement is should raise some eyebrows. I've even forwarded him screenshots of the email linked to the DMCA takedown notice and he's just baffled as to what is going on, while also wondering if MarkScan Enforcement is a scam company.

And then came later that night.

Around 9:15 pm EST that same Tuesday, I received ANOTHER DMCA takedown notice on Twitter from MarkScan Enforcement. The tweet that was being targeted was a reply tweet to WrestleClips, who made a tweet last year that said, "Who has that one Shawn Michaels video?" My reply was, "Sure, why not?" and included a clip that I rendered on my computer with Shawn Michaels in it, which is owned by World Wrestling Entertainment.

What did MarkScan Enforcement say in this new DMCA takedown notice? Their statement was the EXACT SAME as the previous takedown, stating that I'm infringing on Pure Pro Wrestling's copyright with that clip that was in my tweet from last year.

Uh, WHAT?!

Pure Pro Wrestling isn't a client of yours as I stated after talking to the owner of the company and Pure Pro Wrestling has nothing to do with the clip that your company targeted on my account. That video clip that was taken down on Tuesday evening is owned by World Wrestling Entertainment, not Pure Pro Wrestling. Neither of those wrestling organizations are associated with each other nor do they have control/say over the copyright of content from each others' organization.

I'm not even kidding, their personalized statement in this newest takedown was the exact same as the one that was given for the takedown aimed at the 2 pieces of Pure Pro Wrestling media that I shared on my account, which was content that I filmed myself (only clarifying that part because I prefer to share images/video from these shows that I filmed myself, rather than taking that media that someone else has filmed from these shows).

From what I've gathered with the information in all 3 of the takedown notices that were sent to my Twitter account, the person who issued these removals is the Chief Operating Officer (COO) of MarkScan. I've also emailed the company 3 times through the email address given in the takedown notice from Tuesday evening, but I still haven't received any responses to those emails.

That means that I've emailed this company at least 7 times overall since 2020 and they've been radio silent in regards to responding to my emails, wishing to get answers to their chosen actions. And I'm not alone in this, many others have struggled to receive any responses from this company over the years through email.

I can only formulate 2 possible causes of these takedowns:

MarkScan Enforcement themselves are acting on their in order to take me down (possibly due to my posts on social media and videos where I call them out) out of anger of some kind.

Someone is impersonating Pure Pro Wrestling in order to send MarkScan Enforcement after me in order to get my Twitter account taken down, which I've had for 16 years now.

None of this has made sense to me over this week, but things are just very suspicious. They claim to work with Pure Pro Wrestling, yet I have confirmation from the owner of PPW that he has no idea who this company is. They takedown a WWE clip and still claim that it's violating PPW's copyright, yet PPW doesn't own a clip that's WWE property.

Due to the stress involving this whole ordeal, I had to put my Twitter on private for the first time ever and seriously scrub posts from my account. WWE videos/clips, photos from these Pure Pro Wrestling shows, etc. I shouldn't have to put my account on private due to the fear of being removed from the platform because of this company.

I honestly feel like this is an orchestrated attack against me, since I'm not seeing anybody else this week have this kind of issue on Twitter in regards to dealing with MarkScan Enforcement. And I'm not talking about people that I'm following, I'm talking about anyone who makes a public tweet because I know people have been vocal whenever MarkScan Enforcement has come after them.

They targeted my channel on YouTube and gave it 22 strikes. They suddenly return and start finding stuff to come after me for on Twitter after 4 1/2 years of silence (in terms of trying to come after me). They don't answer emails that request a discussion about this or even any form of resolution, leaving users online in the dark.

I have filed a counter-claim against the recent takedown, since it's an obvious misidentification. Pure Pro Wrestling has no say in regards to the use of World Wrestling Entertainment's property, so it's not possible for my sharing of a WWE video clip to be in violation of Pure Pro Wrestling's copyright.

This whole week has been very stressful and it's probably the most mentally drained that I've felt since my current DoubleZWWE channel was hacked in July of 2022. I just want this mess to be resolved and to just finally get this whole thing figured out.

MarkScan Enforcement, I want answers and then I want to be left alone after all of these years.

[thedoubleztv]

How Have I Survived?

The state of one's mental health isn't something to take lightly, regardless of their gender or other factors of who they are as a person.

I've been reflecting lately about my life over the last 7 years and wonder how I'm still going, despite so many setbacks that have had seriously negative impacts on my mental health.

My grandmother's heart attack in late-August of 2017.

My best friend passing away 5 days after I last heard from her in mid-September of 2017.

My trip to the ER for gastroenteritis (commonly referred to as the stomach flu) and serious dehydration in November 2017.

Struggling on getting results on dating apps, despite how many I was putting myself out there on for several years.

Having no personal life (social life and dating life) for years on end due to my 3rd shift schedule.

Nearly taking my own life in the Summer of 2019 due to a serious number of things that were happening at the time.

Losing my grandmother in October 2019, who had been there for me for my entire life.

Losing 3 of my biggest YouTube channels in less than 24 hours due to the MarkScan Enforcement debacle in April 2020.

Losing a lot of money due to an ex-best friend and his ex-girlfriend screwing me over in various ways between the Summer of 2019 and Fall of 2020.

The massive drama involving my ex-girlfriend named Red in 2021 and 2022, which messed me up for 2 years.

Struggling with my sexuality and coming to terms with it in August of 2022.

One of my YouTube channels getting hacked in July of 2022 (which I was able to get back through YouTube's team shortly thereafter).

Getting COVID-19 in May of 2022.

Getting my heart broken in September of this year after falling in love with someone who I had been dating for almost 5 months, who didn't love me back.

The panic attack that I was stricken with in February of 2021 at work.

Getting my personal information doxed by trolls who went after me in 2023 (and for a period prior to it) due to a person that I was friends with at the time, which also involved deliveries of pizzas and religious literature to my home.

Being stalked by an ex-friend (Alabama Stalker) since mid-2021.

I might be forgetting some other things within that period, but those are the ones that I can easily remember off the top of my head, even if some things are out of chronological order.

I look back at those things and wonder to myself, "How have I continued to keep going despite all of this?" Never sought therapy or any kind of mental health assistance, yet I'm still somehow going.

[thedoubleztv]

The Day I Saved My Grandmother's Life.

August 27, 2017, a day that been etched into my brain as a day where I didn't realize that I'd be saving the life of the closest person to me.

The day prior, my grandparents and I loaded items onto my grandfather's hitch that he would take to my uncle TJ's house the following day. The hitch contained leftover garage sale items that they didn't collect, so he would bring them over on the 27th.

Fast forward to around 6 pm that day. I was awake at my computer desk with insomnia, unable to sleep prior to work for some reason. My grandfather was out of town, so only my grandmother was here with me. She suddenly opened my door with her hand on her chest, breathing heavily and saying, "I can't breathe."

Up to this point, I had only seen/heard her breathe like that for 2 reasons: Being out of breath from walking a lot and having low blood sugar because of her diabetes. But she hadn't walked around a lot that day because we didn't leave the house and she never has breathing issues when her blood sugar was low.

I sat her at the kitchen table and called my grandfather's cell phone, but hung up after a bit because he didn't answer.

"Call 911", my grandmother said.

"Are you sure?", I replied.

"Yes," she answered.

Called 911 on the landline and a paramedic with an officer were quick to get to the house, while my grandmother was conscious and responsive during all of this. As an ambulance arrived, my mother called on the phone to ask why the neighbor called her to let her know about this and why it wasn't me instead. That's because I'm more focused on making sure that my grandmother (maternal grandmother) was ok than anything else.

My mom arrived before the ambulance left and she went with them, while I stayed behind in case anyone called for updates. It was so eerie being in that house after that with the utter silence, it became one of those "What just happened?" type of moments. My aunt came over shortly thereafter once I got showered to take me to the hospital with her.

Plenty of us were in the waiting room at the hospital, awaiting an update on my grandmother and taking turns to see her. My grandfather and myself went in together and my grandmother was awake/alert in a nearby room, but we noticed that one of her arms seemed to have more color in it than the other.

My grandmother turned to me and said, "Thank you for saving me" before we hugged each other. Of course I was going to save her, she was my grandmother and had been there for me ever since the day I was born.

As a side note before I continue, she was the one person in my family that I felt truly cared about me more than anyone else.

I got home within an hour and had to go into work, since I somehow couldn't call-in after all of that happening (combined with a serious lack of sleep beforehand). In the meantime, my grandmother was transported to a bigger hospital in a different city. Got home in the morning after my 3rd shift schedule and was in bed around 10 am, but heard the phone ring around noon. My uncle came by and asked if I wanted to come to the hospital because my grandmother was having surgery on her heart.

I declined for 2 reasons: I didn't think much of it and I was seriously tired after the day prior.

Woke up that night to get ready for work once my grandfather got home and asked what was going on, which lead to this reply:

"She had a heart attack."

My heart fucking sank upon hearing that news and anxiety riddled me after that, wondering how different things would've been if I was asleep or just wasn't home when all of that happened.

Thankfully, my grandmother recovered from all of this and was home within a week. The odd thing was that neither she nor I even realized that she was having a heart attack in the first place because of her symptoms.

But it's still surreal to me after all of this time that I saved her life that day without even knowing what was going on in real time.

I love you grandma and I still miss you so much.

[thedoubleztv]

I Regret Knowing You.

Anybody who has known me for a while can tell you that this statement is true: I have no luck when it comes to dating.

For the past 11 years, I've been on a 3rd shift schedule and it has really affected my personal life (both social and dating). I've tried using the dating apps to get myself out there to hopefully catch someone's eye, but to no avail. It didn't matter what app/service that I used, the results were the same for all of them at the end of the day.

This leads to 2021, where things really became headache-inducing.

By mid-2021, I had been single for close to 5 years. My prior relationship ended in October of 2016 and the dating apps left my self-confidence in a dead state. Being alone for lengthy periods of time doesn't give me a reason to find happiness in life. just keeps bringing down my mood.

Well, something happened that I thought was going to make a positive change. My best friend Robin introduced me to her friend (at the time), Red. I'm going to refer to her as Red because I refuse to address her by her actual name (and she's also a redhead). Red had a rough upbringing and Robin introduced us because she knew how depressed I was during that period, as well as feeling very lonely.

Needless to say, things started happening pretty quickly with Red. However, things also quickly fell apart in record time.

Red's negative traits quickly came to light that we didn't know existed. Jealous to a VERY unhealthy level, constantly thought I was cheating on her with Robin, gives me the silent treatment to the point where I felt like I didn't matter to her, and had a complete lack of self-awareness. She even thought I was cheating on her with Robin after I bought her Grand Theft Auto 5 because she thought the kind act had some ulterior motive behind it. No, you wanted the game and I asked if you wanted me to buy it for you and did so after you said yes.

At the time of the relationship, I was 29 years old and hadn't experienced intimacy yet. Despite knowing that, she complained to me about being sexually frustrated after not having sex for a few months. If she's sexually frustrated after a few months, then what was I up to that point?

The relationship only lasted around a month before I broke things off. She missed our 1-month anniversary for various reasons and she was ghosting me the night before I broke things off by hanging out with someone else. Before that calendar month was over, she already got into a new relationship. Really showed what I meant to her.

By January/February of 2022, we tried reconciling and were even each other's Valentine that year. But then, her negative traits started up all over again. She was having serious issues with Robin around that time and was talking shit about Robin behind her back, which was aggravating me. And of course it'll aggravate me, that's my best friend you're disrespecting there. Red didn't even want me to have Robin in my life anymore because she didn't want to "share me with another woman".

Newsflash: You don't dictate who I can and can't be close to in my life. I don't do that to you, so don't be pulling that on me.

She even got on my case for helping Robin out with money, but not her. Then again, how would I know that Red needed help when she never spoke up about it?!

By the end of March, things were hanging by a thread due to the constant arguments that she was starting. She was going to buy me a present on Amazon, but changed her mind after another fight that happened with Robin. Speaking of whom (quick a second), Robin almost left my life completely more than once because of the drama with Red. Anyway, there was a ray of hope around the end of the month because Red was planning to take a personal vacation for a week or two after the 4th of July to spend time with me. However, that never happened.

One day, Robin asked me for money for gas and breakfast, which I easily agreed to help her with. Gas is needed in the car for travel and Red wasn't contributing to it, so someone had to step up to help. Then Red got pissed at me for it and went silent on me after a brief conversation after the financial transaction. I had to go on with my day after another outburst by Red with work that night, but I got a message around 3 am the next morning during my work break.

Robin messaged me to let me know that Red hadn't come home after jumping into another guy's car, which was a red flag right there. The next morning, Robin tried repeatedly to call Red, only to get all of her calls rejected through Facebook Messenger. Red explained to Robin that she got a ride to her grandmother's house to sleep there and was going to have breakfast that morning. This whole time, I haven't heard a word from Red since her outburst the prior morning. I sent her a photo from Rocket Power and she replied with "classic", which was the last thing she ever said to me.

Later that day, I spoke to Robin about being worried about not knowing where Red was. Robin asked if I had Red on Snapchat and said to use the Map feature to see if her location shows up, which it didn't because Red ghosted her location. And then the bombshell happened that night.

Robin let me know that Red was spotted earlier that day at McDonald's with the guy whose car she jumped into the day prior, which shattered my heart. As a result, Robin kicked Red out of the house. Robin warned Red to not break my heart, but Red didn't listen because of her selfishness.

So now we fast forward to this year because there's more to add. After Robin kicked Red out, she kept Red's cat because she felt that her cat would be better off staying with her (Robin) rather than with Red. Well, the cat got into an accident with another animal one night and had to have a leg amputated. So, Robin felt it was the right call to at least let Red know about the status of the cat (who now has 3 legs and is completely fine despite that setback).

To my surprise, Red asked how I was doing while they were talking.

If you wanted to know, you would've contacted me after 2+ years. Instead, you're spending more time talking to someone who you got into an altercation with, disrespected behind her back, and acted like she was the worst person ever than you have spent talking to me. Robin and I had your back more than anyone else, yet you backstabbed us.

Robin said that Red feels ashamed for what she did in March of 2022, but I don't buy that one bit. If she felt ashamed, she would've personally contacted me to apologize and wouldn't use the "I'm afraid of how he'll react if I talk to him" excuse to justify the silence. You're older than Robin by a year or two, learn how to put that aside and reach out to someone like an adult.

I'm at the point where I refuse to make peace with Red because of all of the damage that she caused. I was mentally and emotionally screwed up for 2 years because of that betrayal that she caused. I know it's weird to let something like that affect you, but personal relationships don't happen to me very often (as stated earlier) and to have someone pull the shit that she pulled really hurt me. I can't forgive that woman for what she did under ANY circumstance.

There are 3 things that are unforgiveable in my book: Cheating, physicality, and abandonment. If you cheat on me, you get physical with me for no justifiable reason, or you abandon me, I can't forgive you.

And I'm not going to conform to this "being the bigger person" nonsense because that means I'd have to allow those actions to happen without consequences. I'm not going to forgive and forget what she did to me and let her think that she can do that without being held accountable for what she caused.

Red, you're the worst woman that I've ever known in my life and I hope you never experience true happiness going forward. I've been told that you're still with the guy that you ran off with, which is a surprise because you've had the ongoing reputation of being a ho (which you admitted to being). Robin and I had your back and you know it, yet you didn't care. Was it all worth it at the end of the day? I sure as hell hope not.

If you're reading this folks, please take this post and parts of it as a warning of what to look out for in your dating life. Take those negative things that I was put through and use them as reminders of what to avoid for yourselves, for the sake of your own happiness and sanity.

[thedoubleztv]

In 2017, I Lost Myself.

The last 7 years of my life haven't been easy because of one particular event on one specific day.

The closest person in my life was Deanna. She wasn't just my ex-girlfriend, she was my best friend in the world. We had known each other since the Spring of 2011 and were together for almost 2 years between 2012 and 2016. Unfortunately, my job schedule really tore things apart in the lead to the initial breakup in December 2013.

Despite that breakup and the final breakup that happened in February 2016, we never left each other's side. After we broke up for the final time, we continued to immediately talk as though nothing had happened. Not the most common thing to have happen when a couple breaks up, but it's a great thing to remember.

However, everything fell apart in September 2017.

On September 10, 2017, I talked to Deanna through the Kik Messenger app. She had adopted a black cat that she named Luna (most likely named after the black cat from Sailor Moon, which she was a fan of), was dating a guy named Brandon, and she was getting excited about becoming an aunt in November.

I didn't know at the time that it was the final conversation that I'd ever have with her.

Between the later part of September and mid-October, I tried to contact her a handful of times to talk to her, but never received a response on any messages that I had sent her way. The messages were delivered, but neither read nor replied to. That was completely baffling to me because she always read my messages the day that they were sent to her, at the very least.

Around mid-October of 2017, everything crumbled from within me. I was playing on my Xbox One prior to doing a live stream on YouTube and checked my friends list to see who was online at the time. When I checked Deanna's profile, it simply said that her status was "Offline" without an additional note of when she was last online or what she was doing the last time she logged into her account. This was the point where I knew something was off.

She wasn't getting on Xbox, wasn't replying to my Kik messages, and I hadn't heard a single peep from her for a little over a month by that point. So, I had to figure this out on my own.

I had remembered her mentioning that she had another Facebook account, exclusively for family and friends that she had known from high school/college. So, I used Facebook to search for that profile to see if there was any activity on there to hopefully figure out what the cause of the silence was. And when I did that search, I found 2 things:

Her other profile and her obituary.

It turns out, she had passed away on September 15, 2017, 5 days after I had last heard from her.

Upon pulling up her obituary, I fucking lost it. I almost fell over out of my chair, losing all control of my emotions with the realization that the closest person in my life was suddenly gone and so soon after our final conversation. The only piece of information that I've ever received about her passing was that she passed away in her sleep, which still eats at me to this day.

Why in the ever-loving hell is my best friend gone and how could she pass away in her sleep at the age of 27?! That has eaten at me constantly for the past 7 years and I don't think that I'll ever get an answer to that question, no matter how much time goes by.

One thing that I still vividly remember was our song, "Amazed" by Lonestar. That song was a song that chose to represent our relationship and I couldn't listen to it for 3 years after she passed. I tried listening to it one day on either her birthday or the anniversary of her passing and got so emotional, it lead to me getting out of my chair and punching my closet door in frustration.

My best friend in the world, the closest person in my life, and my biggest supporter was gone in the blink of an eye.

I truly believe that a huge part of my died when she passed because I haven't felt the same ever since. I'd honestly give anything to bring her back because I'm so tired of feeling hurt.

Deanna, I love you. Never forget that.