thefastlaneme

[thefastlaneme]

Things I Wish I Said

If this person reads it one day, although it might be never, I hope you can understand my thoughts and feelings leading me to that moment.  

Dear You, 

Remember how we met? I was so quiet, I didn’t want to talk to anyone, wanted to be alone and was very self-destructive. I don’t really remember if we were desk buddies but we were classmates. 

I used to remember that I hate cutting my wrists and scratching my fingertips with a safety pin felt like healing to me cause when the water hits the scratched skin, I would then be reminder how I’m still alive. 

You knew what I was doing at the time, obviously you didn’t stop me but dang your sarcasm at the time made me stop at one point. I think that year, I was very grateful to be in that class who embraced me wholeheartedly and accepted me. You guys let me be myself and soon that lonely, quiet girl was gone. Most of it was because I met you. 

Later in 2008, I had to move across the state and we still talked to each other. Meet each other whenever we could. That’s how the story would go until I got into the same university as you but this time you’re my senior. Since we both had different classes and stuff we never get to hang out much. I still remembered how you were pissed I fell asleep and we were supposed to hang out. So you ran from your dorm which was 20 mins away from mine, greeted my room mate and beat the shit out of me. 

We didn’t really have much memories together in university though but it was still enough. Fast forward to 2019... ah the year it all changed. 

You met a guy from work and fell in love with him. It wasn’t the first time you had a crush but I was considerate that this guy seems to be so into you and I pushed you to him. I guess courting and being in the relationship is so much different. I don’t really have much experience on it since my ex and I never did the courting part hahaha. I thought at that time, he would be the shoulder you needed to lean on. 

Boy was I wrong. I don’t think you remembered but before he entered your life...we naturally only text when we want to, meet when we want to which you know it was like maybe twice a month but since you got together with him. It became an everyday thing. 

I was happy at the time but then it felt like you only needed me to whine about him. So I felt like my presence in your life was no longer that important. I don’t know what person I had become for you at that time. The long hours of calls I received was soon felt so draining to listen to and sometimes I wasn’t even paying attention. Because the call was all about him. 

I’m not sure if you were aware that 2019 was the year I felt my depression was bad. I wasn’t self-destructing but I worked long hours, met the wrong people, I could barely stay at my apartment, and just felt exhausted. Whenever you called, I wish you could ask if I was okay cause there were days I felt so drained, I just want to cry and wander alone. I did that alot that year and I did wander alone. 

Remember I told you I wanna spend my birthday on my own by going on a solo trip? I really wanted to go but I was scared of going. So instead I booked a hotel just to be by myself but still I invited you along. I wanted to take you out on a nice place to hang out at night and just have fun. But then... ahhh your ex really makes me wanna kill him sometimes. 

He did something to upset you and you guys were fighting. I know you sent a message to me saying if I still wanted to invite you to stay with me that night but I said ok. I just didn’t realized your ex is a huge fucking dickhead, a really fucking selfish dick head. Anyways I was mad at him for destroying that night for us. I wished it could have gotten better. 

Then a month later, I felt so anxious and I don’t understand where my anxiety came from but it bothered me. I thought it was something cause I did but the news came and it ended up the anxiety I felt was for you. 

I don’t really remembered what I felt at that moment but we left afterwards. I don’t really know what happened to you after that day. All I remembered was you made a decision and I was against that decision. I know you needed my support and because of that decision, I just couldn’t accept it and decided that you should figure it out on your own. 

I sent you so many sorrys and you always said you understood why and forgave me. However, at one point, I got pissed and deleted your number so I won’t remember it. Then one day in October, you called me while I was at work and I answered it thinking it was someone else and asked who was it then you dropped the call. 

I know that around late 2020, I don’t know maybe guilt overwhelmed me and made me to add you back on facebook. Sent you a message on messenger and you updated me with what was going on then went cold on me afterwards whenever I sent you a message. I knew at that moment, ahh I ruined us but I still held on, I saw your WA stories and in the end, I just couldn’t do it. I found a note on my phone that I wrote mid 2020 and sent that to you as a final goodbye. 

We were friends for over 12 years and it hurts to be haunted by the memories of us together. It felt like we did a lot together, grew up together, and one fateful night, we are no longer friends. 

I feel so guilty during that period. You needed me the most but I was stuck with work. I wasn’t able to leave work early, I wasn’t able to reach my hand out to you. I feel so bad that I couldn’t protect you well. I know you have so many hardships to go through and I was never part of those that could make it better. I’m sorry that I wasn’t a good friend. I hope you can find a better friend instead and move on in peace. 

I’ll just treasure the memories I have with you until I can’t remember them anymore. I hope you can love yourself more and accept the decision that you have made. Maybe it was the best for you. 

Once covid ends, I hope I can meet you for the last time to ask for forgiveness to you directly and end our friendship at a good note. 

Until then, I wish you well and be safe. 

[thefastlaneme]

I have to write this down cause honestly I feel stressed about the whole Pandemic thing.

So a little backstory before I begin.

Back in mid December 2019, I have hinted my manager that I will be leaving the company and it took almost a month for her to accept it. She didn't want to acknowledge my resignation at any cost.

It was hard for me to accept that I had to make a decision to leave the company. I had good bosses, an okay management and an awesome team. Plus a lot of things has happened to my company since I first joined the company. It holds a lot of sentimental value to me during last year.

But I was at the brink of my depression.

I would work from 9 am to as late as 5 am. I would try to come to work on my off days otherwise I would shut myself inside my room without eating for an entire day. I didn't even talk to my sister at all. I was just trying to live.

I don't know how this started. Why it started. What causes me to be the way I did. Was it my job? Why do I always work late? Why am I spending so much money? Why I was starting to lose interests in my hobby?

I lost my friends over it. I lost my passion for the things I love. I lost my relationship with my family. I give up in my dreams. I just lost everything at that time.

I stayed at the office during New Year's Eve until 5 am in the morning. Working my ass off and I missed celebrating it. It took me another 7 days for my manager to finally sign that letter and the weight was slightly lifted from my shoulders.

I couldn't believe it that I am finally leaving the job that I love but hate as it brought me to depression. I was so happy to know I was gonna leave.

I planned everything that I will be doing after I left my job. I applied for part time study so I can finally get my degree. I planned out things to do and release for my accessories business. I want to do my driving license, find a place for my studio, maybe get an apartment. A new high paid job. Everything was planned out.

I officially left my job on the 7th of February. 2 days later, I received an acceptance letter from the University I applied and the next day I attended the orientation.

I was so excited cause right off after I left my job, I finally get to attend University. School was starting in Mid March so I wasn't much in a hurry.

I was planning out things to do for my business and finding a better job. I still have to pay my school fees and my bills. But I also made the decision to leave the city and move back to my parents house as I was out of job and doesn't have a cash flow.

Moving back to my parents place was a better choice as it was only 10 mins to University so getting to class was easy. But finding a job was tricky. 2 weeks later I had a job prospect from an Asian Pacific company. Meaning I would be working around Asia for events.

Class was suppose to start on 21st March. However, on 18th March my country has put out a restriction movement control order. I lost my job opportunity and my classes has been postponed. The government kept extending the movement control order for obvious reasons and soon my University announced classes to commence online from 13th April onwards until further notice.

I did try to find jobs and no luck as companies have to shut down. So now I'm broke, jobless and stuck at home. I did try to do many things which involves to food as I love cooking the most.

Its fine that I find things to pass time like gaming, assignments and cooking but the shadow is still looming over as I still can't pay for my bills and my study fees are due in August/September. While I do have savings enough to cover for 2 semesters but I don't have money for the remainder of my school years.

Also, I can't find a job and don't know if I will ever manage to find one this year. Although, I managed to walk away from my depressed job and finally healing, I sometimes wish I was still at work even though I would be working in a dangerous conditions.

I can feel that I am not reliable at home. Cause apart from helping out at home, I can't do anything financially. And I do feel like I put a burden on my sister as she is the only one with a job. My parents was also cut off from work as no one is investing on property at the moment. So their source of income was abruptly cut off as well.

Everyone is certainly worried about the future as economy isn't looking promising and every news outlet are saying the vaccines are most likely to be ready by next year but how will we survive until then?

I hope and pray that this virus will disappear but it's not that easy. The best we can do is to do prevention and stay at home. Everyone is struggling at the moment as our normal routine has been disrupted and our standards of normal will be altered once governments lifts the lockdown and denounce the pandemic. For everyone that is going through this hard times, please take care of yourself and your family.

[thefastlaneme]

The World’s Cutest Adventurer

Credit

[thefastlaneme]

Jimin : Hyung! Look at my carved pumpkin!

Yoongi : Jimin, you didn’t even carve it…

Jimin : It’s spookier this way! See, no face!

Yoongi : …

Yoongi : You feel bad carving it, don’t you?

Jimin : I don’t wanna hurt him

[thefastlaneme]

[CH.2] Careful It Bites

Genre: Action, Romance, Friendship, Thriller and Comedy

Pairing: BTS x OC/ mostly Yoongi x OC

AU: Mafia, Spy, Military, Arrange Marriage

[TRIGGER WARNING] Blood, gore, death, guns, torture, drugs, fights, war

It’s been a few days after the engagement announcement. Apart from the big rock on my ring finger, my relationship with Yoongi was still the same. Except the guy is now very clingy over me. I’ve moved in to the BTS quarters for over 8 months now, before the engagement, Yoongi wasn’t a clingy best friend. Heck he doesn’t seem to have much affection towards anyone. Now that everyone is back in the quarters, he snaps at the maknae line if they so much as make an eye contact with me. The first two days was fine but the third day its getting on my nerves. 

Everyone was eating around the kitchen island, eating our breakfast before we all leave for work and we have Yoongi glaring at Jungkook who was sitting beside me while Yoongi was at the end of the island. ‘Hyung, stop trying to stab me with your eyes’ Jungkook said as he swallows down his cereal. I groaned and glared at Yoongi.

 ‘Can you stop harassing the boys? They didn’t even do anything’ I scolded him and he broke his stare from Jungkook and pouted at me. ‘But-’ He started and I lifted my brow. ‘Stop it or I’ll flush this ring down the toilet’ I said and he sighed. 

I found out the ring price accidentally. I happened to go out shopping for new accesories at Cartier and the sales person told me the price for the ring. Despite the Min’s being incredibly rich, Yoongi is slightly careful with money. So I could only guess he was hesitating to get the ring. ‘Why would you flush down the ring for fuck sake is it wrong to look at my favorite maknae?’

Jungkook did a face beside me and looks away. ‘Since when I’m your favorite?’ He said and eats his cereal. ‘You little brat’ Yoongi said, he was getting up from his seat before his secretary came in and pushed the guy back down to his seat. ‘Finish your food Yoongi. I don’t want to support a skinny boss who keep complaining he’s hungry when he’s working’ He said and looks down at Yoongi. 

‘Heebum Hyung, when did you came in?’ Yoongi asked, completely pushed the topic aside. ‘I just came in after dropping off my sons at school’ His secretary sat down and a maid served him some eggs, toasts and bacon. He gave a small smile at the maid and pours himself coffee.

 ‘Aww I haven’t seen them lately. When are you going to let me babysit them‘ I said, eager to take care of his sons. Heebum and his wife has twin boys and I used to babysit them before they entered middle school. Lately he enrolled his sons to extra classes after school just to let them have extra training. 

Usually everyone in this lndustry would send their kids off for extra classes as pre-training when they enters middle school. Once they enter high school, they are introduced to the organization. That’s when the actual training begins. Though the cases never applied to any of the BTS members or myself since our parents are the head of the organization. All of us started training at a very young age. 

‘Sorry Soomin but I won’t be needing a babysitter anytime soon. Plus you’re busier now, I doubt you have time’ He said and I pouted at him. ‘Meanie’ I said and finished off my breakfast. My secretary, Mina came in with 2 briefcases. She set them down next to the wooden bench and sat down beside me. Like Heebum, the maid served her breakfast and coffee as well. 

‘Okay I have bad news for you’ Mina said as she stabbed her fork on the bacon. ‘The pig didn’t realized he’s sacrificing his meat to a brutal secretary?’ I joked and she glared at me. 

‘Unless you want me to take out food out of your bag inventory for missions, you better shut it’ She said as she took a bite of the bacon. Smiling as she looks at me. ‘You evil bitch, how could you make your boss starve out on a mission’ I said and pouts, slowly eating my breakfast. 

‘Boss or not, I have the power of your hunger in my hands’ She laughed and covers her mouth. ‘That is pure evil’ Jin strolled in wearing his lab coat. ‘How could you make a lady starve before her wedding’ He scolded Mina and she shuts up. The only person Mina is afraid of is Jin cause his looks is super deceiving. Plus Jin may or may not threw a bomb at her for fun. Which traumatized her a bit. 

‘Fine I won’t touch your food’ Mina said and went quiet as she ate her breakfast. Jin sits beside me and flashed his famous grin at me. ‘I think I deserve a thank you for this’ He said, leaning his head on his palm as he looks over to me. I sighed and put down my fork. Turning my head over to him and fakes a smile. ‘Aww my savior Kim Seokjin, you saved me from starvation. Such a hero’ I said sarcastically and turned back to my food. He hit my head for that. ‘I’m still older than you brat’ He said. 

‘Ya Yoongi! He’s hitting your bride and you’re not doing anything about it?’ Yoongi shrugs and was busy on his phone. ‘He’s older than me I can’t do anything’ Jin did a small dance and pulled a face beside me. ‘See your man knows who to respect’ Jin said and I rolled my eyes. ‘I’m feeling the love Yoongi’ I said and pouts. ‘Anyways Mina, what’s the bad news that you wanted to tell me?

‘Ahh right well since everyone is done with breakfast, we should discuss at the meeting room now’ Mina said and everyone immediately got up and made our way to the meeting room at the other end of the house. Yoongi walked beside me, grabbing my hands as he walked by. ‘Ohh Yoongi is holding hands now so adorable’ Hoseok cooed at the back. Taehyung even joined in to poke fun. ‘Remember that one time Yoongi hyung looked like she electrocuted him when she was holding his hand and now look he wants to touch her’ Yoongi turned around and flipped him off. 

‘You idiots has nothing better to do than to tease me?’ Yoongi asked bitterly and everyone just laughs at him. ‘Actually yes. You see it’s quite fun to tease you so I don’t think we want to stop now’ Namjoon said, earning the maknae line to high-five each other. Yoongi rolled his eyes as everyone enters the meeting room. The room consists of a glass square table in the middle with 8 tall black leather chairs. The walls were covered with multiple large monitors that is showing codes and agent live trackers. There are no windows in the room for protection and secrecy. This is to avoid any information leaking out just because they can look through a glass to get information.

All the boys secretaries came in after we have settled into our seats. Namjoon, as the leader sat at the front. 

YoonAh, Taehyung’s secretary, passed everyone their individual files. Everyone noticed that some of us has the same files in our hands. ‘Please do not open those files until we finish with the briefing’ Namjoon’s secretary, Youngjin, said as he turns on the holoscreen on the table. The world map came into view with red location indicators spread throughout. 

‘We shall start now’ Youngjin said. ‘Due to Yoongi and Soomin’s engagement announcement, we have received an overwhelming mission requests. Smaller missions are handled by other squad leaders. However, all the tier 1 and 2 missions are passed to each of you in this room. You will be assigned at different locations across the globe. Some will be in a team but the rest will be on their individual missions. Those who has their own missions will be assigned with a special team. All of these missions are classified, none of the external team members knows the details of these missions. As usual, the tier 1 and 2 clients expects a clean and quiet wipe off. 

Now we have 3 tier 1 and 2 tier 2 missions. Tier 1 missions will be handled by Namjoon, Hoseok, Yoongi, Jin, Taehyung and Jimin while tier 2 will be individual missions for Jungkook and Soomin. Each missions on tier 1 will be in pairs. As I have mentioned before, the mission is strictly classified.

Once the briefings end, not a word leaks out of the room. All the secretaries will brief everyone according to the pairings and mission. Namjoon, Hoseok report to Station 4. Yoongi and Jin report to Base 9, Taehyung and Jimin report to Station 12. Soomin report to Base 10 and Jungkook report to Hangar 5’

Everyone gets up from our seats and head out. I ran up to Yoongi and hugs his left arm. ‘We’re not on the same team again’ I pouted, hiding my face against his body. I was actually disappointed that we were not teamed up for a mission. This had been going on for about 10 missions so far. Which was really mean cause he’s the greatest partner to be with during missions. Not that the others are bad but Yoongi has an advantage with his knowledge on weaponry. So he can estimate the timing and the next course of action during a battle.

If he wasn’t a spy plus a weapon designer, he would be really great being an army. He has qualities of a leader and although he looks weak. He’s actually really strong and bold. Yoongi isn’t someone who you can mess around with. One wrong move will land you 6 feet under.

Yoongi pats my head gently as we walked down the corridors to our stations. 'We can still face time baby. I know it sucks not to have me around to look at but it will be fine’ He said and I slightly pulls my head away from his body.

'You ain’t that good looking Yoongi so I think I’ll be fine’ I laughed and lightly slaps his arm. Hoseok runs past us and screeching as he passed by. 'The cringe is too real’ He screamed as he disappeared to the left. Yoongi rolled his eyes and sighed deeply. 'Bunch of idiots’ He whispered. He pulled me away and made me stand in front of him. Yoongi rubs his hands over my arms and bites his lips. 'I know you are a pro at this. That you know what you’re doing when you’re on the field but I need you to stay safe. I still haven’t married you yet so you can’t leave me okay’ Yoongi said as he stared into my eyes.

I wrapped my arms around his waist pulling him into a tight hug. 'You are such a squishy bear. I know I know we both have to be safe. I can’t have a dead fiance. My life would be too sad’ I jumped on his back as I wrapped my legs around Yoongi. 'To ensure my safety, you shall carry me to the station like this’ He laughed as I rest my head on his shoulders. I tapped my legs against his body. 'Come on horsey. I ain’t got all day’

Yoongi starts walking down the corridors with me on his back. 'You know what this means right? No sleeping with random guys’ He warned and I groaned. 'So I’ll be dry until the mission is over. Why do you get to fuck but I don’t? What if I need to seduce a man? This is not a logical warning babe’ I whined and moved my body around so Yoongi had to tighten his grip on me. He slapped my thigh and continued walking.

'You haven’t even let me touch you. I’m your fiance and someone gets to sex you up before I do. That hurts my pride’ I leaned over to his ear and gently bites it. 'We can have sex before we leave’ I whispered as I kissed down his neck. I yelped when my thigh gets another slap. 'Stop it before I put a chasity belt on you’

Truth be told the both of us never slept with anyone cause the nature of our business it would be very dangerous. Sex can be a deadly weakness since we would never know who would turn against us and kill us. The same goes to every member of BTS. We can’t allow our weakness show.

I leaned my head on his shoulder as he carried me to my base. Listening to him breathing somehow calms me down. It doesn’t let me think about my upcoming mission or the long days being away from him. Its strange how relationship status can make you depend on someone differently. Before the engagement, Yoongi was nothing but my best friend who would have my back. Someone who I can come back and spill my secrets to.

Even though we only got engaged, the both of us seems to cling on each other more and start missing each other often even if we are in the same building. 'Yoongi I’m going to miss you so much’ I mumbled, Yoongi’s shoulder slightly shakes as he gave out a small laugh. 'Lets finish our missions quickly then so we can go home early’ He said as we reached Base 10. 'Hop off baby’ I tighten my grip around him. 'Nope don’t want too’ I yelped when I felt a slap on my ass. 'Down kitty I don’t want Mina to beat me up’ Yoongi said and I shook my head.

'No one can stop me. I don’t want to go’ I pouted, hugging Yoongi even tighter as he tried to pry me off his back. He was shaking his body hoping that I would fall off. 'Come one since when are you this clingy on me’ He groaned and huffs after so many tries. Bending slightly with his hands on his knees. 'This is so exhausting’ Yoongi sighed after another failed attempt.

Suddenly a loud bang echoed throughout the corridor making us jumped. I turned my head and saw Mina fuming at the door of Base 10. I gulped and hop off Yoongi’s back. 'Stop acting like a child and get inside now before I beat you’ She said in a low menacing tone. I rolled my eyes and kiss Yoongi on his soft lips. ’ See you when I see you. Be careful over there my cute little kitty’ I pinched his cheeks and kissed it before running inside the base.

'Cute little kitty? No arguments there’ Hoseok voice said as he was leaning on the doorway of Base 9. 'Great… You saw the whole thing’ Yoongi mumbled as he walked passed Hoseok.

Inside Base 10, Mina was still glaring at me as if I did something wrong. I was leaned back on the office chair, picking on my nails. 'Can you like stop glaring at me and jump straight to the briefing. I am bored and your glares are not affecting me whatsoever’ I said, blowing dusts on my nails while Mina rolled her eyes at me. She passed me the tab from across the table. I picked it up and read through the mission details.

The mission will be located in Hong Kong. One of the top companies in Hong Kong is planning to auction a crown jewel belonging to the 17th century Spanish Royal Family. The crown jewel was stolen from the Royal Family back in 1989 by a group of gold traders. The auction starts from US$ 80 Million. The Spanish Royal Family had found out about the auction. They are requesting to send someone to auction on behalf and loan the money from. The Royal Family will grant the organization a safe house with a private army consisted of 15000 soldiers.

I raised my eyebrows at the agreement. 'They are loaning probably a billion dollars for an ancient crown jewel auction and we only get this as payment? Who approved this mission?’ I asked with a stern tone. Mina sighed and shook her head. 'This is crazy a safe house and a private army won’t be able to pay off a billion dollars. I won’t agree to this arrangement’ I slide the tab on the table and pushed it away from me.

'The organization agreed for a US$ 300 Million loan to the Spanish Royal Family to auction in Hong Kong. If the bids exceeds the US$ 300 Million, the organization will retreat and this agreement will be forfeited’ Mina explained as I tap my fingers on the table. This is way too easy for a Tier 2 mission. Any agent could have done this so why did this mission fell into my hands.

I picked up the tab again to read all the agreement thoroughly. The puzzle doesn’t fit and it feels like Mina or the organization is hiding something. However, as I read through the contract, not a word had a loop hole in it. A perfectly designed contract for a simple mission for an auction. No negotiations or fighting for an ancient crown jewel.

'When will the auction takes place’ I looked up at Mina trying to study her face. Secretaries were not trained like agents. They could easily get the job with any college degree so they don’t know the full extend our missions could be. They think they know everything cause they handle agents missions but the organization knows better to filter all the information in and out. None of the secretaries even have a clue who provides them the missions.

Everything has been encrypted and only mum knows the codings to decode all the files belonging to the organization. Even I don’t have any access to decode. 'The auction will start in 4 days from now. They are currently moving the items for the auction to the venue’ Mina said as I gave a slight nod. I got up and took the tab with me. 'I’ll go to Hong Kong tomorrow morning to set up’ I walked away from the base and waited in front of Base 10 for Yoongi.

It didn’t take long before the door opens and Yoongi walked out with a tab in hand. 'Kitty!’ I jumped on him, giving him a hug. 'I missed you so much’ Yoongi chuckled, rubbing my back gently. 'It hasn’t even been 30 minutes Soomin’ I pouted at him. 'Meanie’ I pushed away and took his hand.

'When are you leaving?’ As I lead him away from the base to the main floors. We were walking away from crowded corridors to get to the main floor. There was a small storage room not far from us. On the door there was a a card reader to enter the room. I grabbed hold of Yoongi’s free hand and lead him to the door. I took out a matte black access card and tap on the reader. Pushing the door open and pull Yoongi into the small room. He raised his eyebrows at me but didn’t question me.

'In a week, they need to prep before we can leave. What is going on Soomin?’ He asked as he saw how serious I have become. The room was filled with wooden book shelves and dusty achieve logs. I put my finger on my lips to shush him as I lead him to the back of the room. We quickly passed the shelves to the back of the small room.

A high grade computer was hiding in between old boxes. I quickly sat down on the chair and key in my access on the computer. 'My mission…there’s something wrong’ I quickly opened an old file, searching through a similar mission profile. I searched crown jewel and after decoding an encrypted file, I turned the monitor to Yoongi.

He walked over towards the screen and read through the profile. 'This is the mission from 1989 for the gold traders about some crown jewel. What does this have to do with your mission?’ He looked up to me. I had opened my tab to let Yoongi read through my mission profile. He took the tab from my hands and stood beside me. While he reads through my mission, I turned the monitor back to me and search further about the gold traders mission.

'Mina briefed me about the mission but it felt so weird. It was too easy for it be a Tier 2 mission. We loan the money for the auction and if the bids exceeds the limit, we back out? Why assign that mission to me if a rookie agent can handle it?’ Yoongi hums slightly in contemplation, he slight taps on the tab and looks back on the screen.

'Looks like the organization wants something back’ Yoongi said as he stopped scrolling and I looked over to see the crown jewel picture on the screen. Below the picture was a small paper and I saw a name on the paper with a date 'Choi Hyungmin? Grandfather?’ I immediately looked at Yoongi.

______________________________________________

I AM SO SORRY FOR A YEAR HIATUS IM HORRIBLE I KNOW! Here’s Yoongi looking so happy to receive his Order of Merit to calm your hearts. Credits to the rightful owner~

Anyway I am so sorry for a year of hiatus. I moved away and had no computer. Tumblr on iPad had codings on the draft that I can’t edit. The only reason I can finally upload is because I got a new phone and can finally edit drafts without codings on it. I swear I spent a lot of time brainstorming for this story.

I truly truly love this plot and want to keep it so I will continue writing it. I am super rusty with writing now cause I haven’t been writing in so long. Apologies if this sucks… I hope you will follow me through with this story.

New chapter coming soon. Btw I hope you love the cliffhanger~~~

[thefastlaneme]

<< Part 16 | Part 18 >>

Namjoon x Reader au in which your dog runs off to your neighbor’s yard to play with his dog and you decide that you might want to play with your neighbor {slightly nsfw}

Masterlist

[thefastlaneme]

A Salon Finish -1-

Summary: I broke up with Jungkook hastily via text, so he showed up at my job at a beauty parlor to straighten me out and show me who’s boss

Warnings: rough sex, bondage, a good old fashioned belt whipping, anal play and whatever else I can throw in! Hooray!

It was close of business on a Friday night and I was hard at work at the shop where I worked as a Stylist, focusing on the tasks at hand and keeping my mind off of my love life - or rather I should say my recent breakup, leading to my lack of any love life, as it was.

I used to have a beautiful boyfriend. When we first met my heart was filled with love for him and hope for the sparkling future we’d share together. 

When I placed my hand in his I thought the path ahead would be easy, but said beautiful boyfriend was a pop star, and I soon learned that such a profession came with drawbacks. I learned that music would forever come first to him, and that meant music would forever come between him and me.

The time he had to spend with me was pitifully short and his attention span often was all over the place when he was with me. It was to a point that sometimes I felt like an afterthought to him. It wasn’t his fault, he constantly had people and things vying for his attention and his fast paced lifestyle made him edgy. 

It didn’t take me long to realize Jungkook had many concerns in his life and I was just one of them. 

This felt disappointing to me, an average girl, to whom love meant everything. I loved my job but not like I loved Jungkook, and over the months I tried hard to get him to return that kind of devotion to me, but I felt like I failed again and again. It drove me crazy.

It seemed that the more I felt denied of his love the more I craved it. I began to act out, trying to get a reaction from him – anything really – anger, upset, concern, I was fine with any show of emotion I could get. 

Keep reading

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NEVER KNEW I NEEDED THIS: TAEHYUNG RAPPING ALONG WITH YOONGI | bangtoori

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🌙 He’s Just Trouble 🌙 Ot7

NSFW social media au

A year ago they started a polyamorous relationship with a few rules and it’s going well… too well. Jin might take it upon himself to make things a little more interesting and it might backfire on him. Being the stubborn man he is he tries to put up a fight against Yoongi. Key word: tries

[Start reading]

[tag: hjt]

🌙 Profil Photos 🌙

🌙 1 🌙

🌙 2 🌙

🌙 3 🌙

🌙 4 🌙

🌙 5 🌙

🌙 6 🌙

ONGOING

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For all new ARMYS, you need to watch BTS Yaman TV! This program came out during the Dope area and I remembered that this changed the old fandom (in a positive way) and we had an awesome time joking around! :))

In this talkshow BTS are jokingly talking about their dick sizes, porn, what they find attractive, butts etc. 

BTS YAMAN TV EP 1 ENG SUB

BTS YAMAN TV EP 2 ENG SUB 

Give it a watch! 

Love → @jeonssky

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“It’s already been five years since we debuted. Just the boys with many dreams. We had nothing, but we have many things now. We were only dreaming, but we became a dream of someone. Life is full of choices and regrets. I’m scared, and so are we. We dreamed about flying high up in the sky, but it’s too high and cold. It’s hard to catch our breath. The brighter the light on us, the darker the shadow. What a relief that we have seven members. What a relief that we have each other.”

[thefastlaneme]

BTS Reaction | You’re cuddly when your asleep

masterlist

request: bts reacting to their s/o cuddling up to them as their sleeping? apparently i cuddle people in my sleep lmao

a/n: REQUESTS ARE OPEN!! i’d love it if you’d send some

jin

jin coming home late while you’re already in dream land was something that tended to happen often. if you were awake, it would have been so obvious that jin was extremely exhausted and worn out from work. he changed into some more appropriate clothes to sleep in, and got into bed as quickly as he could.

as soon as jin’s body pressed down on the bed, you placed your head comfortably on his chest, hands following right after. jin smiled as he pulled you closer, wrapping his arms around your body. after placing a light kiss on your forehead, he rested chin on the top of your head.

yoongi

yoongi yawned as he laid into the bed next to where you were sleeping, his weight causing the mattress to dip down slightly. he lifted the blankets over himself and looked over to you, checking if the blankets were still covering you and if he had woken you up.

thankfully he hadn’t and he pulled the blankets up to his chin. suddenly yoongi felt you cuddle into him and making yourself comfortable. yoongi smiled lightly, finding your sleeping body wrapping onto him adorable.

hoseok

some underestimate at how much of a touchy person hoseok is, but you know how affectionate he can truly be. hoseok loves feeling your hand wrapped in his or his hands wrapped around your waist, but when you were asleep next to him and you held onto him as if he was a pillow, he was shocked.

hoseok chucked a bit realizing that the rolls had been reversed as you had fallen asleep. you were never the most touchy and cuddly kind of person, but apparently in your sleep, you couldn’t get enough of it. in all honesty, hoseok truly didn’t mind you holding onto him while you slept

namjoon

earlier in the day namjoon had brought you to the studio where he would spend the vast majority of his time in. you were shocked at how long of a time namjoon could keep his eyes on the computer screen, and in the mean time you ended up falling alseep. “babe? can you come and listen to this track?” namjoon asked. he waited for an answer but nothing came back in return.

as he looked back, he couldn’t help but laugh. you were passed out on the couch of his studio. namjoon took this as a chance for a break and he decided to come and lay next to you and take a small nap himself. nearly the second he laid down, you had already wrapped yourself around namjoon. he never really minded though, since he thought the touch was a bit comforting.

jimin

after sharing hotel rooms with taehyung on tour, jimin’s gotten used to being held during the night. as your sleeping figure snaked your arms around jimin and your head placing its self into his chest, jimin woke up from his sleep.

he couldn’t do anything but smile while you were peacefully asleep on his chest. jimin liked he feeling of you around him, especially since he’s big on skinship. he twirled your hair between his fingers until he slowly fell back to sleep, laying comfortably with you on him.

taehyung

when you pulled taehyung close to you while you were sleeping next to him, he couldn’t help but let one a huge smile. since taehung has to sleep while holding onto something, you were always used to being held and he was always used to holding onto you. although as much as you loved the feeling of holding onto him without anyone holding you for a change, his body turned around to face you and of course, he held onto you to.

besides the fight over whose holding onto who, taehyung loved that you would cuddle him just has much as he enjoyed cuddling you.  

jungkook

jungkook was half-asleep, when he felt the bed moving next to him. he brushed it off, thinking you were just trying to get comfortable. but, that wasn’t the case. you moved your body on top of him without warning, resting yourself between his legs and your head placed on top of his chest.

he laughed at your unexpected antics, and rubbed his hand in circles along your back. as much as he wasn’t used to it, he liked having you close to him. in a similar way to namjoon, it made him fell comfort being this close. jungkook placed a small kiss on the crown of your head and fell asleep.

[thefastlaneme]

A daily reminder of how awesome Jimin is 

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he’s the epitome of this emoji 😆

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Jungkook Social Media Au Masterlist

photographer y/n x musician jungkook

part 1

part 2

part 3

part 4

part 5

part 6

part 7

part 8

part 9

part 10

part 11

part 12.1

part 12.2

part 13

part 14

part 15

part 16

part 17

part 18

part 19

part 20

part 21

part 22

part 23

part 24

part 25

part 26

part 27

part 28

part 29

part 30

part 31

part 32

part 33

part 34

part 35

part 36

part 37

part 38

part 39

part 40

part 41

part 42

part 43

part 44

part 45

part 46

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i didn’t have the energy to add all the parts at the bottom of posts anymore so here this is

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namjoon said that hoseok would actually make a great leader for bts

bts admitted that next to seokjin, hoseok is the most attentive member

hoseok scolds namjoon and others A LOT when they get messy with their stuffs

hoseok is the band’s de facto leader when it comes to practicing the choreography

yoongi said that hoseok was actually kind of SHY

hoseok’s solo song is dedicated to his mother, he said since hes successful now his mama can lean on him instead and he’ll protect and take care of her like she did to him when no one else did

hoseok is jimin’s favorite HYUNG

jimin gets needy and whiny when hoseok leaves him for too long

even though in terms of personalities both him and yoongi are the polar opposites, but yoongi still claimed that hoseok is his soulpartner and hoseok said that he’s the most compatible with yoongi

2seok are each other’s biggest support system and fan

jin gets scared of hoseok when its time for him to rehearse the dances

HOSEOK AND TAEHYUNG HAD KISSED TWICE

jungkook is the most needy and legit take his maknae role seriously when he’s with hoseok lmao

every member of bts is in love with jung hoseok and YOU SHOULD TOO

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Namjoon: You know why boys look good without makeup?

Namjoon: Because society hasn’t told them they look bad without it.

Seokjin: Namjoon, it’s fucking four in the morning. One more existential-crisis-inducing statement from you and I will pound your face so hard, I’ll make sure society personally comes to you and applies makeup on your face its god damn self.

Namjoon: