thefinalduane

[thefinalduane]

hold on. hold. the. phone. teletubby fanfic author, i 100% slept with the guy who has your fanfic when i was in college. multiple times. unless there's another owen out there with a backpack-and-binder-crumpled copy of your fic. it was hilarious btw, what a gift to this world.

@idieonthishill owen has been found

[thefinalduane]

wait other post cancelled. mutuals. when r ur birthdays.

[thefinalduane]

(source)

[thefinalduane]

i just think more 30-40 year old men should be more whorish. act your age for once.

[thefinalduane]

they posted a full version lol it’s mr Stacy’s dad for me

[thefinalduane]

[thefinalduane]

explain your gender in 10 words or less without using boring words like “male”, “female”, “nonbinary”, “masculine”, “feminine” or “androgynous”.

go!

[thefinalduane]

Theyre called draculas because they drank u. La

[thefinalduane]

daily affirmations:

i am kind

i am in control of my emotions

it does not bother me when someone is in the kitchen while i was planning to be in there alone

everyone in the house has the right to be in the kitchen

i am kind and in control of my emotions even when someone is in the kitchen while i was planning to be in there alone

[thefinalduane]

Ignore the god awful quality

[thefinalduane]

THE AMAZING DIGITAL CIRCUS - OVA 5 (1992)

[thefinalduane]

[thefinalduane]

literally any upper middle class tiktok self-identified ‘that girl’ in a pastel workout set with a thirteen step skincare routine and a green juice is a million times closer to being patrick bateman irl than any self-identified sigma film bro

[thefinalduane]

[thefinalduane]

truly the most american thing is Big Drink. more than late stage capitalism, more than an unparalleled cultural focus on individualism, more than 9/11 jokes

what binds all americans together culturally is Big Drink

and you might be saying "is this fat shaming" or "but mayor bloomberg outlawed Big Drink in nyc" or "gays are so annoying about their iced coffee" or some other dumb comment but no open your minds, Big Drink isn't just sugary or caffeinated beverages

every day i see one of you hydration bitches (affectionate) on the train with a water bottle so big a toddler could drown in it. that too is Big Drink. we literally invented a bigger beer can (tall boy) in wisconsin in the 60s in the service of Big Drink

anyway i never feel more american then when i have Big Drink in my hands

[thefinalduane]

man this year is gonna be the year i either die or become someone else i dont know which one maybe both

[thefinalduane]

Excuse me she was WHAT