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not all ships are For wanting them to be in a happy healthy relationship together. sometimes shipping two characters means you want them to be erotically obsessed with each other and become entwined in a mutually toxic love affair for a few months and then horrifically break each other's hearts and never speak again. sometimes you want them to be codependent best friends with enough repression to explode a submarine who only make out/have sex when they're at their worst. sometimes you want them to pine after each other for years, never say anything, and then die. sometimes you want them to kill each other. this, too, is shipping

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Captain Kathryn Janeway

Star Trek: Voyager - Macrocosm

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Women of Voyager out of Uniform

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One thing about Star Trek Voyager is that Captain Janeway acts like she’s in love with every single member of the crew. An important lesson in good leadership.

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Janeway is still incredible representation

As a young woman, I’m obsessed with Janeway. I imagine her being amazing representation back then, but I think that she’s still incredible representation now. Here are some things that I think still make her unique 30+ years later:

She’s “motherly” and she wants to have children, but she’s never made to feel bad or less than about not having children.

She’s so naturally commanding. There are no conversations about her being a woman in charge, she just is.

She has a mixture of stereotypically masculine and feminine interests and traits. As a starfleet captain, she gets to work a lot with science and engineering but in her spare time she plays gothic holonovels and knits.

She sacrifices her personal happiness with great stoicism. This feels like a trope I see used for male heroes, intended to show their strength of character, but I rarely see it used for female characters

She often argues for the pragmatic stance without being an emotionally closed off person. This is so refreshing since many female characters often argue for the moral and/or emotional stance. Female characters who argue for the pragmatic stance will often be shown as emotionless, cruel etc.

She has very realistic mental health problems and regrets, but she presents herself with incredible confidence. She has the same touch of overconfidence that Kirk has, but seeing a female character possess this trait (without being a villain) is still unusual.

She’s a middle aged woman who gets to be seen as beautiful and desirable without that being the focus of her character. The respect she gets from others is earned by her actions, but her beauty is also acknowledged.

Janeway is good at almost everything, but she isn’t always right and she’s no Mary Sue. She’s so aspirational because she’s so realistic, she is never “chosen”, special or superhuman in any way. She feels like a woman I could know, and it’s inspiring to see an “ordinary” woman lead and do extraordinary things with knowledge and determination.

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Captain Kathryn Janeway, a rose for you.

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FINALLY got around to dumping Spotify after their CEO continued to prove he's a fresh turd. (As if being a billionaire, not paying musicians, shoving AI garbage at us, and having an atrocious carbon footprint wasn't bad enough, he's now the chair of a AI-based weapons manufacturing company.)

I used TuneMyMusic ($24 annual fee you can cancel immediately, effectively paying only once) to transfer almost every single song from our Spotify account to Tidal. Tidal already has much better sound quality and they pay their artists much better. It migrated over 99% of our music, too, so there wasn't a huge loss.

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the death of 8tracks made you all so bad at making playlists i fear. good ship or character playlist is max 16 songs and devastatingly perfectly crushingly curated. it should make sense musically, if not across the playlist, then at least from song to song. GRADIENTS of genre. think about this before you make a 200 song ship playlist that includes both maroon 5 and mitski. Think on it

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CHRISTINA CHONG as La'an Noonien-Singh in Star Trek: Strange New Worlds 3.02

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when i was 12 i babysat this girl for a few years and she would come to me and show me her art, drag me by my wrists and point at the pieces she’d made during the week. and she’d be like “do the voice” and i’d put on a sports-announcer olympics-style voice and be like “such form! this level of coloring! why i haven’t seen such perfection in crayola in a long time. and what is this? why jeff, now this is a true risk… it seems she’s made … a monochrome pink canvas…. i haven’t seen this attempted since winter 1932… and i gotta say, jeff, it’s absolutely splendid”  and she’d fall back giggling. at the end of every night she’d check with me: “did you really like it?” and i’d say yes and talk about something i noticed and tucked her in.

she was just accepted into 3 major art schools. she wrote me a letter. inside was a picture from when she was younger. monochrome pink. 

“thank you,” it said, “to somebody who saw the best in me.”

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Jadzia Dax & Lenara Kahn Kiss in Rejoined

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it’s really so silly bc when I was a very sad teenager I dreamed of my adult life as this beautiful, easy thing where I dance in my kitchen and have game nights with my friends and I travel around to see the world and I create things left and right and I follow my heart and find a community that welcomes me readily as I embrace them

And then I grew up and it turns out the world is going to shit and there’s a class war everywhere and my livelihood is under constant threat because I wasn’t lucky enough to be born into generational wealth and climate change is coming fast and god, the powerful are so selfish and and and- and yet, I do still dance in my kitchen. Sometimes my cat asks to be picked up and I sway around in a made up waltz with her tucked into my arms. (This is one of her favorite activities)

I play card games and gossip and watch movies with my friends every few Saturdays even though we’re all overworked and exhausted. i create things in the pockets of time between sleep and work and sometimes I create while I’m at work and I race home to finish it with a childlike sort of excitement. I’ve seen very little of the world but it’s still more than most of my family has. and these things are still just as wonderful as I dreamed they’d be, it’s just that they’re grounded firmly in a reality that’s harder to thrive in.

it makes me sad, because I feel like a lot of people are grappling with how much more difficult it is these days to create a life you survived for. And it can feel sometimes like it was all for nothing- all that stubborn determination to stay alive and keep trying, keep going got us to a world on fire, with all the folks who could do anything about it shrugging and saying no, nothing can be done, it’s too late, it’s just how things are.

Except it isn’t. There will always be dancing, there will always be companionship, there will always be room for hope. It’s never useless to hope for a better life. It’s never useless to believe it can be.

My teenage self wasn’t wrong about that.

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sorry if i'm gonna be quiet for a while. my country recently introduced laws that make it so that in order to use social media to the fullest (not being able to view ns/fw content and in a few cases, not even having access to dms), i HAVE to give the sites my id/face scan.

it goes into effect july 25th. it'll probably effect here too, since this place allows mature content (tho not full on ns/fw)

i'm very distressed about it bc i might end up not even being able to talk to my internet friends. i don't really have any irl ones

if i have to disappear on most socials by then, you know why.

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Just some thoughts on historical Doctor Who companions from a very invested nerd.

Also, should this be a series?

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hating the catcher in the rye is actually very understandable. nothing happens and it’s miserable and if the narrative voice annoys you you will not have any fun. but people who shit on it don’t say that they just make up a holden caulfield to get mad at