So I'm traveling to Rimini, Italy in less than 36 hours to play a game a lot of people consider Childish, that game being Yu-Gi-Oh, to make an attempt to become YCS Rimini Champion 2015. However as of this moment I'm unhappy with my deck, with my side, my extra deck, my knowledge of the game and just about everything. I really don't feel confident about it at all and I just wish I could feel more confident. I have just one friend who seems to believe I'll do any decent and in all honestly he's bad at the game so that isn't particularly reassuring. I haven't been able to properly test since Early July this year so I'm out of practice, out of skill and nearly out of chances, so I'm down to luck to carry me. But I'm determined to make the top cut despite my lack of confidence in my skill. I'm determined this year to make my breakthrough in the competitive scene. I want to be better than the person that kept me playing then made me feel awful. (Non-Yu-Gi-Oh related awful) I want to do better than he ever has and to prove to myself I can achieve what I want, and can be independent.
Me: *gets on bus* omg, everyone is watching me and judging me and they're going to laugh at me when the bus starts and I'm not sitting down. Don't put your ticket in the wrong way or else everyone will judge you and laugh at you.
Me: *goes to pay for shopping* omg, what if i don't have enough money? *counts money 20 times* What if i look stupid or say the wrong thing? Am i even standing in the right spot? What if someone wants to get past and i'm in the way?
Me: *says hi to someone online* omg, they aren't replying. holy shit, why am i so annoying? What if they tell their friends how annoying i am? Why am i like this...holy shit.
Me: *meets someone new* What if they don't like me, or don't want to be around me? I shouldn't have met them. They're probably criticizing me right now. Why am i the way i am?