thoughts4all

[thoughts4all]

Day 898: High Thoughts After Rewarding My Self To Get High For Completing Voluntary Tasks

Going to drop some high thoughts here. First one is a complete and elaborated thought. Second is a list of other smaller but equally if not more important thoughts.

The reason I wrote Take A Breather on my home screen is because people including I operate on autopilotmode. Unlock consciousness by being aware. Auto Pilot Mode (APM) is what this paper names as a diminished mental framework of living. This is where our thoughts are the same thoughts every day of the week. Occasionally its about the thought-spark of not going to the gym enough or equivalent. It could be needing to relax and eat right after returning home. This knowledge could also be potentially exploited. It could very well be the case we are flooded with fear and hate so much that we could become racist or react a predictable way when faced with a situation. Perhaps it could be compared to the Matrix movies. Being woken up from the matrix by meditiating out of preset thought patterns. Being fully counscious means observing what is around you.

Talk to future self motivational calendar To Do tracker webapp idea

Weekly Financial Summary app idea Check if its possible to pull bank data

Research why people don't want to get up when they are comfy. Especially when someone sits down and immedialy needs to get up. It physically feels heavy and hard when in reality moving my muscle mass isn't hard for me at all. Research the physocology of it and try to apply elsewhere. Detach emotion from your physical movements, and you start moving like a serial killer; calculated, sharp and in a slight hurry.

The different comforts in existing location can dictate different moods and though frameworks.

Bonus :)

Who designed the order of the alphabet? [Call friend to discuss if you feel like it].

This leads to more words and names starting from the beginning of the alphabet. Side Rabit Hole: Eastl-Asian languages can have up to down while English is left to right. The bgegnning of the alphbet was lleft of the alphabet. I'm wired to think left and right. Never up and down. Sounds like Newspeak from 1984 George Orwell. Side ML project on letter combinations and fequencies in words and sentences.

[thoughts4all]

Day 888: Another Start

I have a brand new summer term ahead of me. This is my second last term and it is in the summer. I want to spend it well. I want to focus on the things that matter. My ultimate goal is to build an app that I can monetize. Luckily my group's fourth year design capstone project is something I am interested in and would love to build and monetize. I also want to enjoy the summer with my friends. I would also love to spend this term improving my health. Eating better and getting stronger.

I keep getting distracted by social media and being insecure about my relationship. I have a very strong relationship but it will be long distance and last time it was long distance it wasn't too good for me because I didn't feel she was giving enough importance to me. I know I am important to her. Her being busy will also give me time to work on my ultimate goal of building an app. I just need to make sure I don't get distracted by that and by my phone. So far I didn't start the term off too well. To be fair, I jumped in right as my vacation ended so I didn't get to properly settle in.

I also have this thought that I am always rushing from thing to thing and I think I need to slow day and deliberately choose what I am going to do and worry about. I think I need to act with more purpose.

[thoughts4all]

Day 792: Back, after a while

It has been too long. I remembered how important it was to have time to spend with myself. This blog has meditation-like effect on me. I realize how much I miss it every time I enter this state.

On this trip, I was gifted with many start up ideas. While thinking about it, I realized a lot of my issues could be stopped at its source by slowing down, and organizing my life.

A light bulb flickered on. A heading was set. The dusty ropes of stale ship was rustled.

I started writing this blog passionately. Mid thought, I realized taking action was more important at the moment. I am writing this section of the blog post during this mindset. Here is what I leave off with incase I don't comeback to edit it: You were mainly talking about organization and how I have to slow down in life and walk with purpose.

Bye! We'll see - I mean - I'll see if I ever come back to finish this. You'll see right now if the blog ended.

[thoughts4all]

Day 682: Catch Up

I forgot about this blog to be honest.

I am on vacation in BC for reading week. I have nothing to do and finished all of my chores. I was debating on what to spend my time on and remembered this blog. So here I am saying hi.

What's new?

I just got a coop in supply chain. First time actually working at a start up and earning a high salary. I have been taking care of a cat for over a month. Seeing my brother more now that we live 2 minutes apart. My cousins moved to my neighbourhood. Starting rock climbing a little. Actually stuck to my goal of at least 50 push ups a day, for over a month. Got distant with islam but haven't lost my connection with God. Stopped fapping (until today when I had sex yesterday) mainly because of God. Still don't eat pork but now drink freely. Stopped smoking but took a puff or two from a friend. Playing three intramural sports.

"You cannot improve what you cannot measure". I know this quote is often wrongly attributed to Peter Drucker. However, today I made a list of chores and I knocked them down one by one. Now I can relax in peace. Now that I can relax in peace, I feel like spending my time on activities other than watching youtube or reels. The difference of relaxing before and after your duties is that one is an escape and the other is freeing. I can and what to do things other than rot in my bed or on the couch. I might do a puzzle.

I decided I will do a puzzle.

Ciao,

[thoughts4all]

Day 578: My stance on religion

I believe religion was made for two reasons. For people to be kind to each other and to bring people together.

In the old days, the middle east was chaotic. Islam brought them all together and made them kind to each other.

I am living in the west and I don't speak Arabic. Islam is driving me away from my friends and family while also influencing me to be less willing to accept people.

I still believe two ish things. One that there is a god, or at least a consciousness greater than me who is looking out for me. If god wants whats best for me then he can understand that the practices in the Quran are not for me. If I truly devote myself to islam then my best buddies will be Arab while creating distance between my friends, family and culture in the west. I would be giving up everyone I have until today for people that might never fully accept me due to my accent and appearance. I think god knows that by being mindful of him is enough and the best way for me to be happy while giving kindness to the world.

The second thing I believe in is shaytan or the devil. But perhaps not in the traditional sense. I believe there is a human trait to give in when you are at your low. I am excluding sinning in a social setting. The sins are addictive and inherently bad for you. Personally I get tempted when Im bored and alone. That is when it is easy to give in.

My final promise. I will continue to not eat pork as a reminder that I am mindful.

[thoughts4all]

Day 507: Wind Down

Today's post is nothing but me winding down in my day. There isn't some wild idea that I needed write down. Simply writing to end the day off. Inspired by my need to shut down my computer before sleep without my want to use it.

I guess I can write about what I did today. Today I woke up late and disgusting from my sinning last night. I was inspired to take action towards entrepreneurship so I dedicated the rest of my late morning to start one of my roommate's ideas of creating a clothing brand together. I worked on that till I had a deliverable pitch and sent it off past 1pm. Now that I had a full step completed, I could stop for now and start my day.

I took a shower since I was stinky from the previous day. I ate breakfast. Had a long conversation with my roommate about how AI taking over entry level jobs is a good/bad thing. Then a different roommate and I took a bus to them gym to hit chest despite this muscle group still being sore. After bussing home, we wanted to get snacks to eat while watching our show. So we left the house again to walk to the convenience store. I got a single orange. We watched an episode and a half while I ate the orange and the rest of my opened bag of chips. Then, the roommate from the morning came out with his girlfriend while I made and ate dinner. Then we watched an episode all together and now I am going to bed.

I prayed five times today. I went to the gym. I accomplished something entrepreneurial. I relaxed and watched a show. Overall nice summer day.

Now as I am winding down, I will go to bed right after this. Already have my bed ready, phone tucked away, teeth brushed and contacts removed. I will go to bed early without scrolling on my phone. Goodnight, hopefully see you all tomorrow.

[thoughts4all]

Day 505: What If It's Not Logic?

Here is a thought experiment: What if everything doesn't have to make sense logically?

We humans are wired by logic. If something makes logical sense, we believe it. If it doesn't, we don't believe it. We try to rationalize everything. But what if the universe, everything operates without just logic?

There are few things that are not yet fully logically figured out.

Consciousness

Evolution or religion

String theory

Dark matter

What if the universe doesn't have to make sense and humans are trapped with logic. We are wired to look and understand everything with logic. If the universe doesn't actually operate with logic, then we would get thrown in a loop because we will always search for logic.

Application in our daily lives:

Explaining feelings

Understanding purpose in life

Learning to live without a negative spin on life, embrace the journey

Live for a more pure purpose

In my life, embracing a possibility that the world does not operate with logic would open up the things above. This would get rid of negative thought cycles and leave more room to chase a more pure path.

For example, a negative thought path fuelled by logic would be: I want to be happy -> I need to live life -> I need to get in shape to be active in the world -> I am not in shape -> I've failed getting in shape every time throughout my life -> I don't have dedication -> Not having dedication is the reason for not having the things I want in life etc.

Embracing non logic would break this cycle by accepting that there is a higher power in place or there are other reasons why things are occurring. From the example above: I want to be happy -> I need to live life -> I need to get in shape to be active in the world -> I am not in shape -> I've failed getting in shape every time throughout my life -> There is probably a reason for that I don't understand -> Getting in shape was not the right thing for me at the time, which could be explained by my shift towards academics and career -> Maybe I was missing the right reasons, headspace, mindset. I could just live life like an athletic person and trust that I will get in shape over time. -> Maybe instead of getting in shape first to live life, live life and get in shape if thats in the cards for you. Go rock climbing out of shape and maybe you will get in shape. Go travelling in South America without having a summer body to show for when being social. Go live life and let the rest come.

What if the everything operates mystically. Lets say God has control over everything, and operates with means we don't understand. Then behaving in his interest would mean he facilitates things to go in your favour for what is right for you.

Another dangerous loop I get into fuelled by logic is comparing things to others. If person A has things I want, then they must have done certain things. Then by logic, I must do those things to get the same rewards. If the world is not run by logic, then a few things open up. Either 1: those rewards are never meant for me and I can embrace that, 2: those rewards will reveal to me at a different time then him so be patient and stop beating your self up, 3: you might not have to do the same things since you. are a different person, your purpose is different and your skills and person are different. Everyone is different and the same things to apply to everyone. Everyone is their own unique person.

Side note: isn't it weird that every human in the world has different faces and we recognize people by their faces. What if we recognized who everyone is by their hands, or their abdomen. Every different face could mean every different soul. Every soul is different and meant for different things.

Anyways, this is a thought experiment that would explain a lot and would save people a lot of trouble if adopted. Again, just a thought experiment though.

[thoughts4all]

Day 500: Relapse Observation

I relapse. When I have an immediate break from school I relapse into rotting. Masturbation, phone, and video games. I think I need a break from this character. Wanna be school and entrepreneurship only holds when I am externally pressured. When I am at my own devices I rot instead. I think I need to be someone else, I think I'm pressuring myself too much.

[thoughts4all]

Day 498: Add To The Bag

The only reason I am writing right now is because I haven't written in a while.

There was a concept I wanted to write about a while ago. It is about breaking the skill barrier I am always stuck on. I always stop at my natural casual limit. To improve past this limit, I need to one by one add moves to my bag. I need to put in extra time aside to learn a specific skill. I have to train almost. That is how it is with physical things like basketball. It is the same for other skills like video games and coding. If I just show up for scrimmage once a week I might not improve. However, If I go to practice, do conditioning, learn plays, I will be a better basketball player.

[thoughts4all]

Day 477: Sprint Planning

Just planning my day and some thoughts. Practicing some retrospective.

Today:

Finish ML work

Stretch Legs

Go to Bball game

Near Future:

Fix phone

Clean room

Study for cs test

Follow udemy course for fun

Make gf gift

Finish foreign tax research

This Week:

Touch cs project

Touch inventory project

Review missed lectures

Finish ob assignment

This Month:

Start Clothing Brand (see below)

Study all course and do exams

Finish 50% of udemy recent courses

Investigate business opportunities

Business Ideas:

Start uni clothing brand

scholarship portal

[thoughts4all]

Day 476: Purpose In life

I think my purpose in life is to bring joy to the world. I think this was God's plan for me.

God's plan:

As a child I wished I has a best friend. Till this day I never had a one best friend. I had a group but never one guy I could call my best friend.

To have a best friend you would need to hang out with them outside of school. I did not. After school I stayed home and played computer games. The act of wanting to hangout with a school friend after class was just something I never did. Now it is kind of the same. My default is to come home and hang out by myself after school is over. I wonder why I am different. Why don't I crave one on one hangouts and just want to play computer games?

Maybe I shouldn't try to change. Or yet. Maybe I should embrace that I don't want to hang out one on one. God made me different in this aspect. I shouldn't want the same things everyone else wants. Maybe I don't need to have a best friend. Maybe I don't need to start hanging out with people one on one.

Realizing God's Plan:

Step out of your daily life. There are probably steps to step out. Try to see the bigger picture. Not just ur struggles right now. Hunger, horniness, stress, procrastination.

Active vs reactive. I have lived a very reactive life. I have been reacting to life that happens to me. I didn't realize being active is an option. I can choose how my life is going to go. I can choose the struggles I will face. I can choose my state of being. I can choose what to do. What little things I want to work and improve on.

Retrospective. I need to practice more retrospective. See how I have been progressing over the days, weeks, months, years. I don't review and compare how I have been doing over time and I should. I just try to do good everyday. However, keeping track is more effective and probably less stress but its more accountability.

Why Following God Works:

Following God makes you chase less things. Then over time it makes you want less things. "Happiness, clarity and peace comes from wanting less". Sins are things we can never get enough. You'd always be wanting more. Hotter girl, more girls, more money, more luxury, more power. If you are always wanting more you can never be happy.

What I Learned About Love:

There is a difference between the action of loving someone (non-romantically as well) and loving them simply because they are around. Active vs passive.

Loving someone is being okay with withholding the truth to protect them. You are okay with them being mad ara you in return for their best interest.

With people you mutually love, you can exert your own influence on them to prioritize your experience together. For example, you can ask them to shiftaround their schedule to go to this fishing spot with you.

[thoughts4all]

Day 438: People are okay with compromising enjoyment

I think this is a key realization for me about life and how people operate. I think people are okay with compromising as long as they love the person.

This was already blatant to me with chores but I did not realize it applied to enjoyment as well. I perviously assumed two people would do an activity on their free time of they both enjoyed it. If one person did not enjoy it, they should do either one of two things:

Both switch to some other activity that is enjoyable to both.

One continue the first activity while the other does something else.

Here is what I assume my problem is: I valued doing something alone rather than doing something I didn't prefer to do on my spare time. On top of that here is where I went wrong: I assumed everyone else valued spare time the same way I did.

I guess I would search for people that would want the exact same things that I did. I wonder if me choosing to do stuff alone translated subconsciously in my friends minds that I did not love them as much?

[thoughts4all]

Day 417: Experience Different Things

I have changed so much. THe one thing that has been constant in my life is try new things. I am so lucky to have been so many different things.

Religion and non-religious

Academic and partier

School slacker and try hard

Gamer and non-gamer

Really shy and really talkative

Near the bottom and top of a friend group

Been bullied-sh and bully-ish

Been pc and non-pc

Hooked 24/7 and zero tolerance

Book worm and not reading

Junk food spree and healthy spree

Like green subjects (history, a lil geography) and dislike green subjects (chem, a lil bio)

Getting no girls and getting girls

Relationships and hook ups

No drugs and drugs

Had social girlfriend and shy girlfriend

Had kinky and not kinky girlfriend

Had multiple friend groups and had one friend group

Been in perfect family and non perfect family

Feel confident in home country and parents country

Been good and bad at sports

Been starter and bench

Been hopeful in life and unhopeful

Long and short distance relationship

Things I have never been both:

Pure talent but not pure hard work

Kind but not mean/firm

Mindset to be good to the world but not knowingly bad

Noble when doing good but unable to handle being bad

Handling extremes but not middles

Consistently at gym

Organize myself to long term goals

Be organized for a long time

Shot first to a girl I really fancied

Confidently curated music taste

Up to date with messages

Got my heart broken

[thoughts4all]

Day 366: Societies Shift Between Atheism

First of all, congratulations to me as today is my one year anniversary for this blog.

Now for the contents of this post, I have been pondering why societies shift away from religion and some shift towards religion. For instance, in the past 2 generations there has a shift away from religion. City folk in my generation were born into a majority of atheism. I have also noticed that religion is kind of slowly growing. At least there is some interest of atheists becoming religious and semi-religious people expanding their faith. I really wonder why. I think I have found one explanation. People don't want to be controlled. Especially against their interest.

Let us explore the hypothesis that the reason societies shift between atheism and religion is due to people wanting to avoid being controlled. With the introduction to globalization and the internet, older generations could perceive their government controlling and find freedom in being able to communicate and share with cultures around the world. The narrow way of life of their parents don't stand a chance when compared with the new unlocked ability to communicate with anyone, anywhere, anytime. It makes sense that their definition of freedom is decentralized and away from their limiting traditions and cultures.

My generation (in the city) was born into the internet and from parents who found freedom through globalization and the internet. Atheism is the norm in the cities. We are already "free" in our parents eyes. However, we now have a distrust in the government, society and large companies. We believe their are acting against our best interest. To avoid being controlled, we don't want to do what society and the algorithm wants. We don't trust modernism. A lot of the rules in monotheistic religions forbid many things modernism offers that makes logical sense why it can be bad to us. Since we believe large companies and the government is controlling us, some of us turn to a different set of rules to live life by. Rules that governments and companies can't dictate. If society is making us more distant, lonely, depressed, radicalized, lost, then maybe we turn to something else. This coupled with the fact that we don't trust the major players that dictate society. It is easy to make the correlation that the things wrong about society is due to companies making a profit against our best interests. This can be observed in social media where anger causes the most interactions and usage within their platform so polarizing media gets favoured by the algorithm.

Interesting that older generation transitioned to atheism due to dictators and younger generations are transitioning to religion due to large companies and the problems with society.

[thoughts4all]

Day 360: Effect of Music Lyrics

I love how I start off a noticeable amount post by being inspired by a youtube video. Here is the one I was inspired by today: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vSQjk9jKarg

The video basically highlights the importance of relationships to your well being and happiness. I already knew this from reading self help books. I believe The Happiness Advantage used the same study the youtube video referenced. Watching this video reminded me of the importance of relationships to my wellbeing.

Near the end of the video, the guest speaker mentions the story of an individual from the study. This man had a bad marriage, was distance from his kids and did not have many friends. Recipe for sad life. He found happiness after his retirement when he joined a gym. This is was the "first time he was part of a tribe". This quote really got me thinking. Is being "part of a tribe" really that important. I think the answer is yes. This got me thinking, what is my tribe? What are people's tribes?

If feeling like you belong to a tribe has a direct correlation to your happiness, then people that belong to a tribe with everyone are the happiest people. I think this is so true in so many levels.

First of all, spiritually, people are said to live at different frequencies. You can live your life in the frequency of fear or frequency of love. This means you live int the perception of the world in a state of fear or love. The world is something to be afraid of or something to love. If you live in the frequency of fear, then you don't belong to everyone around you. They are out to get you. They are not on your side. You are not part of them. If you live in the frequency of love, then you belong with everyone. Everyone loves you and is your family. Your tribe is the whole world. Your tribe is everyone and everything.

Secondly, I don't necessarily mean belonging to a tribe with everyone on Earth. Although this is what the first point describes. What I mean to say is belonging to a tribe with everyone around you. This is what some civilizations before the modern era were like. Everyone was religious or at least nationalist. They belonged to their religion or nation and some were ready to even die for it. Everyone in their entire lives from the mailman to the old man down the block was part of their tribe. They all belonged to each other. Thus everyone in their lives was part of their tribe, even strangers.

Now what does this have to do with music. Being in a tribe with everyone in your life means all your interactions, all the things you hear and all the things that are said to you are from people in your tribe. If you listen to music eight hours a day then that artist is kind of part of your tribe. He "talks" to you more than anyone else in your life. You associate yourself with him and others that listen to his music. If you listen to gangster rap, then your tribe is talking to you about harming others, putting themselves over other, and sleeping with taken women. These lyrics do not make you love everyone. Not even the people around you. You live in fear that your partner will cheat on you since that is what the woman that hang out with this kind of tribe do. The women present in this tribe are the ones you treat them like the rappers were singing about. What I am trying to say is that the vibe and lyrics of the songs you listen become part of your community. Become part of your tribe. Become who you are and who you belong to.

[thoughts4all]

Day 345: IOS Course

I signed up for an ios course in the beginning of the year. It is now near the end. I stopped just before finishing the first module. The course make you fill out a sheet to keep you motivated throughout the course. I thought it was very funny that I stopped even before this stage. Nevertheless, I will complete it here.

"Why do you want to learn this skill?"

I want to learn this skill in order to make apps. I want to use my creativity in a productive pass time. I frequently get good ideas for apps and wish I could just build it. It is my lack of app building skill that stops me. This is the key moment when I am re-interested in following a course. - Side note: I just got another really good app idea. I want to create an app called "Better me better us" or "BB" for short. It tracks your goals and to do list with your friends and send them messages. Goal is to motivate people to do their goals and not be ashamed to share them, because I think people don't follow through with their goals due to a split in identity - . That went on track, thank you for enduring. To complete this course would mean to unlock the skill that I think would satisfy me. I think it will give me the building blocks to realize my potential in life. I will prove to the people around me that I can put coding to use. That I can build things on my spare time. The person I look forward to proving this the most is myself. This will indeed get me a better job.

"What will I achieve if I learn this skill?"

A large amount of this was answered in the question above. Essentially, I will achieve skills to realize my entrepreneur and passion dreams. Along with a better career. I will be able to earn more, have more flexibility in my work hours, work remotely and travel more.

"How will this skill change my career and my life?"

My career would shift to a more tech domain. My life would change in term of my pass times hopefully. I will be producing more than consuming hopefully.

"How will learning this skill impact the lives of my family, friends and coworkers?"

First of all, since I am an intern, if I shift to a tech domain I probably won't see me coworkers ever again. I will be able to build apps for my family and friends. I can help them be creative and realize their potential as well. I can serve them and let play out their creative ideas. They will be grateful if I can build applications for them.

"How will I feel if I never accomplish this?"

I will feel extremely disappointed as my personal promise to myself was building an app before I graduate university. I will feel like a failed myself. I will probably never forgive myself. I will definitely feel like I missed out.

"What would my life look like if I manage to accomplish this?"

My life will be awesome. I can code on my free time and create my own output into the world. I will be content that I can produce something. Especially since I dreamt so hard about it and that I will have worked so hard for it. From sun rise to sun down, I can realize my creative ideas and produce them for the world. I will be living remotely by the mines where my wife will work. That is her dream and with this I can live right beside her without any worries. I would definitely kiss my beautiful wife when I wake up.

[thoughts4all]

Day 343: 2 key lock and the handle

I think modern day internal issues can be visualized by a door. A door with a 2 key lock and a handle. The first key is a goal. It is a vision, it is a want. The second key is losing sleep. Finally, the handle is new experiences.

The goal. I believe everybody with an internal conflict, has it stemmed from a suppressed want. Your body wants something. Badly. However, you are doing nothing about it. The want might be incredibly hard to achieve. It probably encapsulates a life very different than what you are living in right now. I would recommend the book The Mountain Is You by Brianna Wiest. My suppressed goal is money. Specifically, it is being financially stable. I believe this is the want of many. As a teenager, I want certain I would become a millionaire entrepreneur. I would be successful and free from the bounds that keep the average folk. As I am now slowly entering the real world, It is harder than once presumed. You have to start paying for life, which shifts your focus onto direct income, rather than ventures that could pay out millions later. After sitting with this want, I realized the root of it. I want to be financially free. My want is not actually having a million dollars, but it is actually not being bound my poor finances. Don't get me wrong, I have not gave up on the dream of becoming an entrepreneur, I will pursue this eventually when I have the resources to do so. However, while realizing the core of my want, I am able to shift myself and find peace where I am. See, before, I would beat my self up if I am not spending every second of my free time towards progressing towards becoming an entrepreneur. In this stage of my life, I need to do well in school and find good internships. This is what I have to do anyways. I have very little capital. Although I have higher energy because I am young, I also have little time. I have to study, find internships and also live my twenties. Focusing my effort right now on securing a career with scalable income, should be and is my goal. I need capital to start a business anyways. Additionally, since my core reason for wanting to have a business is financial freedom, a high paying job does provide some financial freedom as well. Becoming a seasoned programmer will definitely give me some financial freedom. Thus, pursuing this path right now will not only set myself up for a business later, but also is achieving my core want. I know this paragraph was meant to be external help. It shifted into am internal view. The premise is, find the thing that is making you miserable and conflicted, since it is probably near impossible for you to achieve right now, hence the conflict, find the core want behind this desire and take reasonable steps towards it.

Losing sleep. This sounds counterintuitive but allow me to elaborate. You should do an activity late into the night and sleep less than what is healthy. Not everyday obviously, but perform little sprints. Think of the last time you did this. Was it completing a late assignment, playing a video game, hanging out with friends, taking care your child? During these activities you loose track of time. You know you are losing sleep but that is okay with you. Why? You know what you are doing now is more engaging and rewarding than perfect sleep. You get to really live right now. Why be in tip top condition tomorrow when you are doing something that really resonates with you right now. Sometimes you have to do this activity. Such as a late assignment or taking care of your child. You don't have a choice and it is not necessarily fun to you. However, you are still prioritizing your sleep over it because it is something rewarding to you. Completing your assignment propels you in school and takes once step closer to having a successful future. Taking care of your child spreads love and care and you benefit another human being, which is in itself a very rewarding activity. Maybe you only did this because their crying woke you up. Nevertheless, you know deep down that you lost sleep because you helped another human being, not a selfish reason. Activities like hanging out with friends and playing video games, we lose sleep because they are intrinsically fun. We enjoy doing it. We really get to live. Being tired the next day seems irrelevant when you are doing a truly engaging and enjoyable act right now. Optimally, doing an activity with both of these reasons is what you should be looking for. Something that is rewarding and enjoyable. Hopefully, creating a passion driven business for instance. The second key reason why we should lose sleep is not staying up late, but being tired the next day. Now you might really be confused. How is being tired a good thing? Let me explain. If you have internal conflict, most likely you are not taking action. You are not doing anything. You are not living. Being tired is the proof that you did something. That you lived so intensely, that you sacrificed your well being. You and your body worked hard for something the day before. You did something you were passionate about. You progressed or really enjoyed yourself. You were content in what you did. You got to live your life close if not at your potential. Being tired is proof that you did the work. Every instance you feel a wave of tiredness, you subconsciously get happy because it is a reminder of your effort the night before. It is satisfying knowing you performed an action that truly resonates with you. You got to really life your life. So much that it broke your regular routine. Hard work is rewarding. Losing sleep is a good measure whether you putting in the work and it a good physical positive enforcer.

The handle. Notice this point is not a third key. It is a handle that lets you open the door. It is what is needed to change the state of the door from close to open. Many of you think it is more dedication, more effort, more motivation. Stop it. This leads to negative self thinking. You associate your current state of not having the thing you want with your inability to work hard. This is so backwards. Every human being as the ability to work hard. We have all put in effort to something in our lives. Beating the next level in a video game, making a bracelet, braiding hair, doing homework, drawing, taking care of children, getting groceries, cooking. Convincing yourself that you are incapable of putting in effort is stupendous. Yes effort and work is needed for you to get from where you are to where you want to be. The door closed to the door opened. But how is not just more work, more effort. Chances are you have tried to achieve want you want. Since you are reading this, you probably did not achieve it. The bottom line is, it is not more dedication that will change your progress but different experiences. Different, optimally new, experiences will help you change into the life you want to live. "The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, but expecting different results" Albert Einstein. For our case, constantly trying to put even more effort and expecting to change in insanity. Telling ourselves that we need to put in more effort is the part that we do over and over again. We expect that this time, putting in more effort will change things. But yet again we are mistaken. Even more so, we convince ourselves that we are incapable of doing hard work. On top of insanity, we assign negative traits to ourselves that simply is not true. If we were in fact incapable of doing hard work, then why is our subconscious pushing us there? Why is our body craving the things that require work? Why are we constantly trying to change if we are not not capable of hard work? You see? It makes no logical sense. We are all capable of doing work. So what is thing holding us back. Simply it is ourselves. The blockade you are facing does not require you to overpower it with more dedication. This will instil more resistance within you and the blockade will appear even stronger with every fail. Instead you need to understand yourself and how you work. You need to understand your true wants. It is an internal path. This is a path we have no knowledge on. Since it is not physical or measurable, it is hard to know progress and asses if we are changing things or not. It is unfamiliar territory that operates with a different set of physics. This world operates with a different set of rules. Ones we do not know yet. Mastering ones self is an extremely deep topic. The one peace of advice I recommend is experience new things. Different things works as well but new things have the potential for the biggest effect. If we do the same things everyday, we probably think the same thoughts every day. "I need to put in more work", "I need to get good sleep", "I'm so tired", "I should start going to the gym again" etc. Doing new things at new places opens up our mind to new thoughts. It gives us knew building blocks and mediums to assemble these blocks into thoughts. We are no longer confined by our regular thoughts but have the opportunity to experience new feelings and ideas. Go fishing, go hiking, join a club or a team, travel to a close by city as a tourist, visit an old friend. Do new activities in new places. Or at least something you have not done in a while. This is the handle. This allows for change and growth. This can open your mind into taking steps to open the door. Equipped with the two keys, this will allow you to change your life in the way that you want.