throwingmelons

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@confessionsofareindeer Thought of you on this glorious day

schoolbus is lowkey goated when looking out a window while listening to your moms classic rock and thinking about your personal philosophy in a moral ocd honoring way is the vibe

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daily affirmations

I know why i am like this and i will never do anything about it

Psychologists could never help meee

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“why are you smiling at your phone?”

um. cuz. my friends are silly

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sorry i can’t go out tonight i’m at home sitting down

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I can say from personal experience that not being allowed to walk around and casually explore the world when you're younger becomes an extremely miserable way to live out your childhood and only serves to instill a weird fear of the world in your kids. Maybe our American cities suck at being walkable, but geez, don't just raise your children to perpetuate it by keeping them in cars and houses all day long.

This is a legitimate and damaging cultural shift for all involved parties and it needs to be addressed.

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Yknow the whole smooth jazz implies the existence of rough jazz bit?

Well my mans responded with “rough jazz is just ska tho, right?”

Best take I’ve seen in a while

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The modern day metrosexual.

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Speaking as a survivor of child sex abuse: the world would be a lot better if yall spent less time talking about the ways in which pedophiles should be punished and more time supporting survivors and preventing abuse

I get it, punishment can feel cathartic. I’ve certainly spent time imagining all the ways in which my own abuser might be punished. But ultimately, him dying, or being jailed, or publicly shamed, isn’t actually going to help me nor will it stop more kids from getting hurt in the future.

I don’t want more prisoners. I want free therapy with trauma informed counselors. I want better sex education for young children that teaches them about consent and body autonomy. And I want a society in which I can openly discuss my trauma, or at least as openly as yall discuss the evils of pedophiles

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Like we have to always remember that a person with health anxiety can get ill, a person with paranoia and psychosis can be in serious danger, a person with social anxiety can get bullied, a person with RSD can get rejected, a person with BPD can get abandoned, a person with depression can have a serious reason to be upset and so on indefinitely. We cannot automatically treat every concern of a person who has been labeled as mentally ill and irrational as if it isn't worth taking seriously and investigating. Making that assumption puts people in real danger.

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That one Ben N Jerry's flavor that's based off the band Phish for some reason and has way too many confusing flavors all at once and a kind of weird texture but that's okay because as the only single person I know who actually likes listening to Phish, I have to do my part in eating their ice cream to show support, and really, despite the strange amalgamation of tastes, you give me a pint and im going to eat the crap out of it and enjoy every odd bite. Yeah, that one. Definitely a compliment by the way. Really though, most people reside in my mind as the Ben N Jerry's Phish Food ice cream flavor. It's like the perfect description of humanity.

@confessionsofareindeer

new tag game!!

i’ve just always wanted to try and start a tag game so uh yeah :D

…what flavor of ice cream is the person who tagged you?

@notthesodaa @ribbitingconversation @lowercaserowan @yosefinthetrenches @janenotbirkin @residentoddity (and any of my other moots) (no pressure!)

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i think a really funny project that a statistics professor could have their class do is like. put a bunch of random, patently untrue demographic statements into a hat. "the most popular tv show among white men ages 24-27 is Bluey." "the majority of business majors are middle children." "bisexual women love hot chips." and each student picks one out of the hat and you gotta like. design a whole study and survey a group of people to specifically achieve that result. you have to prove it true. by whatever means necessary. you have to construct the most biased study possible and wrangle in your exact demographic to make that statement a statistical reality. i think people would learn a lot.

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Wii smoking game where you pretend the wii remote is a cigar and move it to your mouth to puff on it and the screen shows your mii smoking. And the game is called Wii be Smoking

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This is why I don't wear skirts.

me when I go out wearing an outfit I wouldn’t usually wear: oh my god everyone knows this is an outfit I wouldn’t usually wear I’m so embarrassed

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Me except I don't know what I want ever and I have no clue what I like and I very much hate deciding things.

One of my biggest pet peeves is that somehow I seem to be the only person in the world who means it when I say I'm down for whatever. Like just name whatever you want, I swear on my soul my comfort zone is bigger than yours. I'm fine with sitting at home drinking tea and playing board games, going out and ending up snorting lines off a park bench with 14 strangers at 3 AM, going to national theatre to see their production of La Traviata, sitting outside a grocery store watching pigeons fight over french fries, I'm 100% down. Just tell me how to dress for the occasion and I'll be there.

And then people are like "nooooo I don't wanna take charge just you decide uwu" and that's essentially a code for "I don't want to tell you what I am capable and willing to do, I want you to guess what I want to do, and I'm not giving you a clue because I don't know either", and then they insist that they're not, they're down for anything too, and it's like bitch we both know that one of us is lying and that person isn't me.

I'm down for anything except ice fishing, cat-calling and sports events. I might make an exception for some sport that seems fun and interesting, but I'm not sitting through an entire hockey game. Like those are my limits, just fucking pick something.

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