thsx - Tumblr blog

[thsx]

okay y'all im about to be so annoying but i am gonna put this blog on a bit of a semi-hiatus

im so sorry about this! my d.jat.s hyperfixation burned hard but it also, unfortunately, burned fast and i'm having trouble w/ motivation on this blog (i'm kind of having trouble w motivation in general, so trying to force it here just feels kind of silly)

i'm gonna be hiding out on @infernil which is my blog for marie from the gr.ishav.erse lmao and also on @ephemaera which i might be remaking but it'll be the same url

thank you guys for being so SO kind and welcoming, ily all lots!

[thsx]

oh jk its literally only been 10 days??

me, rocking back up to this blog after like weeks jkrebfguirbegiu

[thsx]

me, rocking back up to this blog after like weeks jkrebfguirbegiu

[thsx]

@da1syjones said: come on, i’ll make us a cup of tea.

simone can't help the quiet smile on her lips. it's nice to see daisy like this–– in her element, in her own space. it's nice to see daisy well. her friend looks so much more at peace than she's ever seen her. it all feels very right, finally. sure, simone lives on the other side of the country now, but their bond is one that defies borders and bounds. she'd already flown around the world to make sure daisy was all right; what's a 6 hour trip to see a dear friend?

"depends on what you're brewing," she says, teasing, "because i'm used to whatever they've got at the diner. your palette is much more refined than mine." really, though, she'll drink just about anything daisy offers up, even if it's some exotic thing she's never heard of.

[thsx]

IDK WHO MADE THIS BUT I'VE BEEN LAUGHING MY ASS OFF SINCE I SAW IT

[thsx]

graham likes to think he's fairly put together. where his brother can a whirlwind of emotion, he tends to be quieter, calmer. billy uses his pain the way artists do, like a tool, a pen in his hand. graham has found that he takes pride in being steady, consistent. he's someone to be relied upon. that also means he's good at keeping his feelings quiet. that one's more of a dunne brothers special, all things being equal, but even so–– graham has become particularly good at keeping things under wraps. that's the thing about karen, though. she makes everything different. being around her feels like waking up. and he can't come right out and say that; he knows he can't. but things sometimes slip out. like his mouth is trying to let her know while his brain isn't looking.

when she replies, he can't quite gauge if she caught his meaning and is trying to gently deter him, or if she really took his words the way she seems to. regardless, graham settles back into himself, a quiet smile on his face. "yeah," he says, "yeah, i guess you're right." and, of course, she is. even at the worst of times, when tensions are high and there are disagreements, there's a sense of togetherness. "i dunno. maybe the daisy and billy stuff's getting to me a little. you know? like there's a crack in the hull."

graham dunne is a nice guy. he was honestly the nicest one out of all the boys in the band and she can confidently say that he's one of the nicest boys she's met ever, in england or the united states. if karen was even slightly like camila, she would've been thinking about what a life with him could be like beyond the industry; marriage, kids, house and mortgage and all that. but she wasn't. karen really, really liked graham, but she just wasn't. at least not at that moment in time.

no point in being cruel and breaking his heart on such a nice day though, so karen just quirks a brow at him and says, "i'd hope so. it'd be terrible for the band's chemistry if we didn't — or if we had a connection that wasn't so... positive, don't you think?"

@thsx's graham dunne : but i feel like we have some kind of connection, right?

[thsx]

FOR A MOMENT A BAND OF THIEVES IN RIPPED-UP JEANS GOT TO RULE THE WORLD; 𝘧𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘶𝘴𝘦𝘴 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘥𝘢𝘪𝘴𝘺 𝘫𝘰𝘯𝘦𝘴 & 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘪𝘹.

[thsx]

a frustrated breath puffs from her nose. i can't. he can't do this for her, or won't? she is so tired of asking for what she needs, only to be met with nothing. it hurts all the worse from billy, who sees her so clearly but refuses to look. maybe she reminds him of all the worst parts of himself, but what about the good? she knows he sees it–– he has to see it, or else what does that make her? even as she'd written this song, as she'd been her angriest at him, hadn't it all been because, despite herself, she loves him so much? he wouldn't be able to hurt her so deeply if she didn't see all the wonderful things about him along with the bad. and yes, she longs for him, wants him, but it goes beyond that. and perhaps that is the worst hurt of all.

billy always seems so determined to believe he's under attack. she watches his eyes flit anxiously over the lyrics. and yes, she can admit that they're fairly scathing, but haven't they said and done worse to one another? and if he's so dead set on not being with her, shouldn't her anger be some kind of relief? daisy realizes that she knows him like the back of her hand and at the same time can't figure him out–– just as he does with her. the feelings of connection and isolation are always at odds with them. maybe that's what makes it all so hard.

" don't be ridiculous, " she says softly, not so much frustrated anymore as she is tired, " of course it does. " that's the whole point of the song, in a way. what he says, what he thinks, matters more to daisy than she'd care to admit. and all he seems to be able to do is deny her. his stubbornness lights the tiniest spark within her, but she tries to tamp it down. more flies with honey, and all that. the fight always gets her nowhere with billy, and while daisy has no plans to concede, she's willing to try a gentler approach–– especially if it means they can get to some kind of place of understanding. " i don't know that, " she says matter-of-factly, " in fact, i'd argue that we both know it should. "

his  arms  fold  across  his  torso,  immediately  defensive  in  this  confrontation.  one  he  isn't  willing  to  participate  in.  his  shame  feels  a  lot  like  a  headache,  his  eyes  close,  letting  it  engulf  him.  “  daisy,  i  can’t—  ”  his  voice  quivers.  she's  asking  too  much  of  him.  she  wants  a  confession,  and  that  is  more  than  he  is  willing  to  give.  communication  entails  admitting  what  he  did,  what  he  almost  did.  how  can  he  pretend  he's  getting  closer  to  being  the  idyllic  version  of  himself  he  has  attempted  to  construct  through  simple,  pretty  songs.  but  that  was  before  her.  daisy  jones  doesn't  let  him.  doesn't  she  know  she  has  already  ruined  him  in  so  many  ways?  she  brings  out  the  ugly  in  him,  found  he  likes  it.  and  now  he  must  face  the  music. 

emotions  run  high,  battling  all  stages  of  grief  on  a  molecular  level  he  gives  her  one  chance.  he  makes  a  show  of  reading  the  napkin.  his  heart  pounds  to  the  beat  of  a  drum  that  warren  is  not  playing,  rings  in  his  ears.  her  confidence  is  warranted,  the  song  is  good.  it  shouldn't  come  to  him  a  surprise,  if  she  weren't  talented,  they  wouldn't  have  be  able  to  write  an  album  together.  one  he'd  been  proud  of  up  until  the  moment  she  tries  to  shake  the  rug  from  under  him.  she  doesn’t  need  him  as  much  as  he  needs  her.  were  he  not  the  target  of  the  lyrics,  he  would  be  able  to  accept  that.  his  mind  gets  away  from  him,  itching  to  compose  a  guitar  riff,  he  can  hear  a  dark  ominous  bass  line,  catching  himself  digging  his  own  grave,  planning  his  own  funeral.  but  ultimately  he  can't.

“  it  doesn’t  matter  what  i  really  think.  ”    he  tries  for  stern  once  more.  it’s  too  personal,  too  raw.  the  lyrics  expose  him  and  hit  a  nerve.  did  she  man  them?  is  that  how  she  really  felt?  surely,  she  must  know  he's  had  many  sleepless  nights  because  of  her.  he  doesn’t  dare  picture  them  or  bring  them  up:  the  hypotheticals.  he  wants  to  give  her  the  world,  but  cannot  be  the  one  to  do  it.  she  means  something  to  her,  but  he  cannot  tell  her  that.    “  we  both  know  this  can’t  go  on  the  album.  ”

[thsx]

RILEY KEOUGH as DAISY JONES DAISY JONES & THE SIX | Track 8: Looks Like We Made It

[thsx]

ind. sel. multimuse featuring characters from leigh bardugo's GRISHAVERSE, such as KAZ BREKKER, FEDYOR KAMINSKY, and more / penned by jay / psd.

[thsx]

ok sorry for liveblogging so much lmao im gonna try and write tomorrow!!!

[thsx]

GRAHAM NOT BEING ABLE TO SPEAK ABOUT LOSING CAMILA??????

[thsx]

mkay i do not like it

also billy relapse? hhhhhh idk how i feel about this!!!!

is it realistic? yes. does it feel right to me? nnnope

[thsx]

also billy relapse? hhhhhh idk how i feel about this!!!!

is it realistic? yes. does it feel right to me? nnnope

[thsx]

thots:

billy looks so genuinely heartbroken about falling out w eddie at the chicago show like i think thats a moment where hes realizing how awful he was and how truly and deeply he has lost his friend

give me back my girlhood it was mine first is EXTREMELY daisy and that makes me ssad

[thsx]

noooooo billy loves daisy so much like yes romantically but like also he just for real actually loves her under all the lust and shit

[thsx]

ok im sorry i got mad at the show that was an incrdible opening