thunder-birb

[thunder-birb]

The 5 times Tamaki accidentally confessed to Mirio and the one time he didn’t have to

Mini Series Part IV

4.

Thud. Thud. Thud. The sound of knuckles knocking against the hardwood door beckons me to get up, but the weight of disappointment clinging to my heart keeps my feet rooted to the tiled floor and back against the ceiling mere centimeters away.

“No one is here” I reply, which people will probably take as a joke, because clearly someone has said something, but if you know me, then you know that I am hardly joking. No one is a reflection of how I am not anyone worthy. Just a nobody who can’t measure up to the standards of such a prestigious school and should have never gotten accepted in the first place. I am a waste of space. A nobody. No One.

“Well, I thought it would be in no one’s best interest to know that they seem to have forgotten about their prime member who is also feeling like utter shit and would actually like his best friend to talk to... At least for now, before he has to smile and pretend he’s okay to all of his family watching back home...” that carefully guarded voice finally breaks near the end and with a deep breath, I rise up and twist the door knob open.

Pulling the door behind me almost feels instinctual with him; like I’m always shedding another layer that I usually have mountains of when it comes to other people. Yet, with him I find myself bearing my soul, even at times when I feel like I am sinking, slipping away into a nobody. Maybe it’s because when I open the door, his eyes don’t smile at me like everyone’s does in that reflection of pity and concern. No. He never once considers me as someone weak, or beneath him in some level. He sees me as an equal, someone who despite their own demons can be a shoulder to cry on and can be strong enough for the both of us.

And surely enough when the door is wide enough for my head to peak out, his eyes are not on me. They are downcast on the floor, shoulders sagging heavy like the frown I know is on his face. He isn’t just here to check up on me, but also to confide in me. No one gives me that power to heal and people won’t believe how much I crave to be needed sometimes.

“Mirio--” I cry out, feeling the dry scratch of my vocal cords after I abandoned all forms of comfort in favor of sitting here in the pool of my own loneliness and regrets.

“Tamaki, how have I fallen so behind? I can’t believe that there’s such a wide gap between me and the rest of our class when in the beginning the possibilities were infinite...” Mirio clenches his fist, face finally rising above mine in utter dismay. There are wrinkles on his forehead, far more than I have ever seen before, his blue button eyes blurring from tears begging to be released and cheeks red from boiling over in frustration. He blinks hard, eyes finally letting the water escape and sighs deeply, further letting go of all the pent up emotions he’s been keeping to himself.

Once again, I am baffled by how comfortable Mirio is with me. How can he not spare himself? Even just a little bit, so I don’t see all the imperfections or the rawness of his core? My heart sinks deeper, burying itself beneath the ground with all his pain that I know so well and fear more than anything. Yet, here he is unashamed with being seen. Something I could never ever do and which is why I was in the class room by myself in the first place.

Feeling like I might also start losing myself in the dulling ache of dissatisfaction, I stop myself from overthinking and wrap my arm around him in an embrace that feels unbalanced with the way my arm can barely engulf him, meanwhile his arms are still at his sides. I slowly move my hand up and down his back, and Mirio relaxes into me with his head resting on my shoulder.

“I know... It’s like no matter how much you try to catch up, you just end up three steps back from where you started. Always running to an end you will never reach” my eyes start welling up again and I can’t just hear the sounds of the crowd filling my ears like in the arena, but I can also feel the cameras watching punctiliously and seeing every single bad move I make. I can hear their criticism, see the judgment in their eyes and it pulls me deeper into the side of my mind that only knows self-destruction.

“With the way I’m going, that’s a sure bet” Mirio falters and for once the sadness overpowers his sunny skies. It’s like a dark angry cloud has drove the sun to a corner and ubiquitously covered the blues above.

But I think people forget that it has to rain sometimes. No one can always have the rays of light in their smile and Mirio isn’t any different. So, I hold him even though my heart is aching just as much as his. I find that sometimes being strong for someone else can fill the emptiness and by the end of it, he’s actually the one holding me. It’s a weird dynamic between us, but I guess the road has always been so bumpy that we just know how to comfort one another or when one of us is reaching his limit.

🌦️🌦️🌦️

“Ugh. You two better not start again! Especially you Amajiki! Or I’m gonna wind slap you so hard, you’ll be smiling for the rest of your happy life!” Hadou warns wagging her accusatory pointer finger first at Mirio and then at me. “We have done enough damage for the rest of our lives! And I want nothing more but big fake smiles on your handsome faces, got it?” she glares at both of us hard, testing our mental stability. Then, at no sign of us breaking down any minute, she smiles and slips naturally in between.

She encircles her left arm around my right arm and her right around Mirio’s left, connecting us into a bond that started ever since our very first Sports Festival at UA.

We didn’t do so well then either and one sad retreat into the grassy fields outside became three frustrated individuals crying their disappointed hearts out. Of course I was the one sad male who started it all, ‘a natural trendsetter’ Mirio would joke, which actually got Hadou to laugh out loud and broke the triangle of sadness that reigned on us.

Mirio found me right after his group match elimination and we just laid on the greenery, while we watched the clouds drift by like in middle school. Hadou came along by accident and just like a gush of fresh air, she brought many revelations to light.

“Hey! hey! did you know that when the olympics were still a thing, students our age who also competed had to face the pressure of millions of people scrutinizing their every move??” she pats both of our arms to get our attention, not that her being with us was already news enough...well mostly to me.

“You don’t say?” Mirio commented used to amusing Hadou’s little bits of trivia she loved to throw in every chance she got.

“Oh sure! Many of them also couldn’t shake off the high standards expected of them and some even took years to finally cope with the pressure! But that didn’t mean adults didn’t slip up once in while or got stuck in a rut in their competitions, you know? So, really this--” she gestured vaguely at us being outside and the rest of the world focused at Sports Festival inside. “Is actually quite conventional” she supplied with a small smile.

“I mean we’re still human” she continued as she flipped her blue bangs away from her face, brought her hands together and hugged her legs in a tight squeeze. “And mistakes will always happen, but it’s how we learn to get around them that really tests our capabilities as future heroes” she sighed like she was physically shrugging off all her tribulations and then resolutely laid down between us with her arms stretched out.

Mirio and I looked at each other, mouth agape and for the first time of knowing Hadou did we finally saw through her. She wasn’t just a curious busybody that everyone pegged her for. She was insightful and curious because she loved to learn and understand the things around her. She was also the only one that intrigued Mirio enough to learn some of our lessons, which was no easy task since Mirio generally preferred to be out in the field.

I guess people just never gave her enough credit and for guys like me and Mirio, that was something we knew all too well. So, that was basically how the Nobody’s Only Club was born. We really started it to cheer ourselves up after a not so successful first try at the Sports Festival, but it became this support group that reminded us we weren’t alone. And with that we just inherently became good friends.

“C’mon you guys! Yuyu is probably on her way to the HW by now” Hadou drags us both and I almost trip over them not aware that we’ve been walking this whole time and now approaching the school’s gate.

“We’re going to HW?” I ask, confused and Hadou slaps Mirio’s arm twice.

“I told you he was zoning us out” Hadou shakes her head at me, while Mirio shrugs at her and mouths an “I tried” at me. I have a terrible habit of being in my own head a lot and sometimes it stems from me not wanting to be part of the conversations in the first place. Hadou thinks I should practice talking with them anyway, while Mirio fills in the silence and covers for me when he knows I’ve drifted.

“Sorry Hadou. I’m still working on it, but why are we going to HW? I thought--”

“Well after you told me Mirio has ‘the voice of an angel’ I figured we should go get some chicken and sing our hearts out at the new Karaoke place a few stores down!” she wraps her arms around us and jumps in excitement. Meanwhile, I choke on air and start coughing, refusing to look at either of them.

Hadou starts patting my back in concern and I steal a quick glance at Mirio, who of course catches me looking at him because I am choking to death. I fight the burning warmth rising on my cheeks and try not to think about the slight tint on his ears. He tilts his head like he doesn’t know what to say about the whole ‘angel’ thing and honestly I don’t either. I didn’t even say that exactly, but I just keep drawing out my cough even though it doesn’t even itch anymore, so I won’t have to say anything at all.

Sometimes you gotta choose your battles and this one just isn’t it.

🍗🍗🍗

Already, distracted by the scenery around us, Hadou talks a mile a minute about all the questions she has for the world. Mirio, being his amicable self either makes a goofy comment about it or actually has an answer to her endless ramble. Meanwhile, I watch the sky above me and pay attention to every single thing being said. I’m nodding when I’m suppose to and letting Hadou swing our connected arms back and forth as we continue our walk.

We fall into a comfortable pace and soon the surrounding trees and the occasional houses are replaced by the tall skyscrapers of all sorts as we move closer to the core of the city. I always liked that UA was up in the hills and away from the stresses of the town. It makes it easier to disconnect from the world sometimes and just focus on our daily hero lessons at hand.

“Hey we’re almost there!” Hadou points out, walking with an extra skip in her step.

“Oh yeahhh! I’m getting pretty hangry too” Mirio wiggles his brows and I chuckle because it reminds me of Johnny Bravo when he is about to do something stupid. Mirio beams at me, happy he made someone laugh and Hadou looks at us like we’re weird.

“It’s like you guys don’t even need words to communicate! How advance~” she comments with a smile that I don’t quite understand. I raise the collar of my uniform and burry my cheeks under them, looking straight ahead.

“Haha! You make us sound like an alien life source!” Mirio laughs, back to his old bubbly self. We keep walking getting closer to the shop until we make a familiar turn over to HW.

Upon spotting Yuyu scrolling through her phone by the entrance, Hadou breaks free from our arms and runs towards her friend. Yuyu clearly amused by her friend’s antics, turns to her side to hide her smirk and pretends she doesn’t hear Hadou approaching her.

Mirio and I trail behind Hadou and we watch as she jumps at Yuyu and screams happily. It definitely scares the people coming out, but Hadou is easily excitable, especially when Yuyu is involved. They hug and exchange greetings like they haven’t seen each other just yesterday. Then, Yuyu waves us down and motions for us to get in.

We find a cozy spot in the back of the store and wait for our order of their large hot wings and drumstick combo with 4 large sides. It’s a little crowded and my skin tingles with nerves, but Yuyu and Hadou keep the conversation going, while Mirio’s fingers drum an unfamiliar beat at the empty table in front of us.

The black plastic buzzer blinks red after 10 minutes and furiously shakes on the table. Mirio does his silly celebratory dance when he’s excited mostly about food and offers to carry our order over to us. Hadou, Yuyu and I stay seated and watch Mirio wait for his turn to get our meal.

“You guys think I should compete at the Beauty Contest again? I kinda don’t want a repeat of last year...” Hadou pouts, dejected eyes now concentrating on the table, which causes Yuyu to stop playing with her long blue hair.

“What do you mean should I? Of course you should Nejire! You’re perfect for the Beauty contest!” Yuyu squeezes Hadou’s shoulders, and Hadou shakes her shoulders to take Yuyu’s hands off.

“You’re only saying that because you’re my friend” she turns her head away from Yuyu and refuses to accept her encouragement.

“Hey! Because I’m your friend, my opinion should matter more! Besides I know you best and I’m sure you can win it this year!” she turns Hadou’s chair to face her and squeezes her cheeks, so she looks up. They stare at each other, both not backing down and I wonder for a moment if I could ever have such a stare down with anyone without feeling like I’m being cut open.

“Fine! That’s one vote” Hadou concedes, smile betraying her, but then she turns her head and looks at me. “What about you Amajiki, what do you think I should do it?” she asks and I feel an immense pressure coming from Yuyu and not just because she’s kindly placed her hand on my shoulder.

“Yeah Amajiki isn’t she perfect for it?” she nods at me, big eyes waiting for me to confirm.

“Well um--- I understand your hesitance Hadou because to Yuyu you can do no wrong, but I also agree that you should give it another try” I smile at her, nervous that the buzzing around the store suddenly dies out once I decide to open my mouth.

“See??? Even Amajiki says yes!” Yuyu jumps and gives me a hi-five I nearly miss. “And you got that right! Nejire is way too cute, so it’s hard to find any fault in her!” she pats Hadous head and Hadou in turn smiles even wider. She hugs me and I nearly jump off my seat from the suddenness, but just let her squeeze tighter anyway.

“But hey! You’re one to talk Amajiki! I believe I recall someone doing the exact same thing when anyone says anything bad about Togata! Like remember that time with Burokku-san?” Yuyu points out, voice louder than it should be in this other random silent moment in the store. I peer over at the cashier and of course that’s when Mirio is taking our order from the cashier’s hands.

“What no-- I-- I didn’t do that-” I stiffen under Hadou’s hold and panic because dammit Mirio is coming right this way and this really isn’t the time.

“OoOoOoh! I remember that! What was it you said again--? Hmmm~~ It was oh-so-very brave and chivalrous too!” Hadou does this elaborate thinking face that nags at my sanity and Yuyu annoyingly winks at me before immersing in her own thoughtful face. Kill me now.

I take a big sigh and stop my legs from shaking under the table. “Fine. I may have shared a worded altercation with that---guy, but that blockhead had it coming and you guys would have done the same” I reply quickly, schooling my features as best as I can, already knowing how they get when I act more flustered. Not this time you two! I won’t let you get to me!

“Oooooh, so you admit you think Togata can do no wrong in your eyes?” Yuyu smirks sealing in her trap and the little control I have over the situation disappears right before my eyes.

“No I--- I never said that!” I jump out my seat startled and can already feel the attention its drawing. I need to leave.

“Never said what?” surely enough that’s when Mirio gets to us with the food neatly packed in a plastic bag and a tray filled with our drinks in his hands. “And why is Tamaki all red?” he turns his head to look at me and I squeak turning away from him.

“I don’t know we were just talking about you and now he’s all flustered” Nejire supplies and I honestly don’t know if she’s still playing with me or just being her regular blunt self. Yuyu laughs all the same and I tighten my hands into fists wishing to disappear. Words of advise; don’t have friends.

“I’m gonna go throw up” I say, speed walking to the bathroom without awaiting their reply and indeed feeling queasy. He didn’t hear anything did he?

“You guys have to stop teasing him so much! ” is the last I hear from Mirio before I drown them out and open the door. I splash my face with water three times and avoid the mirror. I already know I probably look like a tomato. No need to feel worse about it.

I do my sister’s breathing exercises not really sure why I’m even freaking out. It’s nothing. Just mindless teasing. They do this all the time. To me. To Mirio. To other random victims in our class. It’s nothing to freak out about. No. Totally not.

After I feel like the color has drained from my face and I can go outside without turning as red as a well-cooked lobster, I step out of the bathroom and brave myself for more teasing. However, once I step outside the bathroom, Hadou and Yuyu are nowhere to be seen. Mirio though is sitting in our same spot, waving me over.

“Hey Tamaki, are you alright?” Mirio gets up when I finally reach him and I shove my hands into my pocket, so he doesn’t see me shaking a little.

“Yeah I’m great” I lie and I know he knows I’m lying because even to me I sounded unsure.

“They didn’t really tell me what happened, but you know they just like to tease you right?” Mirio opens the door for us even with the bag of food and tray with our sodas in his hands.

“I know… Unfortunately they think it’s fun, but don’t worry, I’m used to it” I reassure him and myself, taking the tray of drinks from his hands as we try to catch up with Hadou and Yuyu way ahead of us already. “It’s just this time--”

Mirio doesn’t say anything, but the way his eyes are following my every word I know he wants to know what was said earlier. I get choked up with the mere thought of almost telling him of all freaking people and try to think of something else to say.

“This time--uhm they were uh--” my mind is malfunctioning drawing that dreaded gray screen with the eerie noise as I’m trying to think of anything plausible to say. C’mon just make something up.

“Saying that---er---” we stop in front of the Karaoke place with Hadou and Yuyu already inside probably reserving our room. I look around trying to think of anything to say and that’s when my eyes fall at his face and then his hair, glistening under the orangey yellows of the setting sun. That’s it!

“Your hair!” I yell without thinking.

“My what??” he tilts his head in confusion and honestly Mirio, ditto because I, too have no idea where I am going with this. “You guys were talking about my hair?”

“Well just hair in general and uhhh--- you know like the length of it” I try to keep it vague until a reasonable idea pops up in my head, but Mirio saves me before I find something ridiculous to say.

“Were you guys talking about that time I had to grow out my hair for my hero costume again?” Mirio supplies accompanied by a very unimpressed head shake.

“Yeahh!!! Totally was. Sorry it just came up and--”

“You were defending my honor? It’s okay Tamaki. I know I looked silly with the long hair” he laughs, humming that rapunzel song everyone sang for the rest of week. You know the one about the lights and the haze--fog lifting? “But I really miss flipping it back and making everyone laugh! Those were my prime days” Mirio snickers tapping his foot to the beat of the Rapunzel song.

“That was pretty funny and I actually like your hair long” I comment, happy to just get the topic flowing into another direction.

“Magi?” Mirio looks up from the plastic bag of food he’s holding and his blue eyes brighten in surprise.

“Well not Rapunmirio long, but like---um--- you know when we were in middle school and you grew it out?” I elaborate, wanting to laugh at his bewildered expression, but also unsure why it’s making my insides squirm and feel too damn warm.

“Rapunmirio! Haha, that’s good! And no way!! I thought everyone said it looked weird” Mirio brushes me off, probably thinking I was being too nice again.

“I don’t think you could ever look weird” is suppose to be a nice compliment to prove to Mirio that I’m being serious. Instead, what comes out of me sounds loaded and like i’ve broken some barrier that no one should ever break between friends. Bros. So, naturally that’s when I decided it’s best for me to never speak ever again.

“Hey guys, they got us the room!” Nejire yells probably making her way down the steps and waving us over.

Still terrified to look up, I keep my head down and stare at Mirio’s white sneakers instead. His feet are brawny and long, mirroring his stocky built that seems to get more pronounced with each passing day. He’s no longer tapping them to any beat, but are still close enough that I think he isn’t too weirded out by me. I can’t really tell for sure without actually looking at his face, which I will never do unless I wanted to die right there.

“Oh c’mon! Stop being so platonically in gay for each other for one second and let’s get this Nobody’s tradition started!!” Yuyu is now yelling as well, making my heart skydive to the bottom of the ground and my stomach feel like it is being compressed into half of its size. Platonically   in   gay   for each other. Oh god, I’m gonna be sick.

“Not to be party pooper or anything because you know I love a good laugh, but I don’t think it’s fair to tease Tamaki about these things” Mirio stuns us into silence and I fight the urge to look up at him.

“It’s definitely making him more distressed than usual and he’s probably questioning everything he’s ever done right now. Him and I are good friends” Mirio wraps his arm around me in a tight one-sided embrace to prove his point, which unfortunately makes me feel infinitely worse. “And it’s kind of weird that we can’t treat each other nicely the way two girls can” he continues and man, I really need to start breathing before I turn purple. And also, wow? Mirio, where did that even come from?

It’s Yuyu’s turn to feel sheepish and I can tell she’s ashamed because she hands Hadou her drink, quickly runs over to us and gives us a full on 90 degree bow. “Oh shit. I’m so sorry! I was always teasing you both, especially you, Tamaki because you get so flustered and it’s absolutely adorable, but I didn’t realize I was going too far... I’m really sorry guys. I know I can be a bit hard on the edges and relentless, but I never ever meant to make you feel weird-awful about it” she slowly straightens her body and meets our gazes. I can tell she feels really shitty about it because her eyes are getting watery, which in the year that I’ve known her has never happened before.

Not comfortable with most people crying in front of me, especially when it comes to girls because well-- I’ve only ever encountered it twice and both times I didn’t really have to do anything. My sister usually throws things or yells at me for looking at her when she’s doing it. Meanwhile Hadou usually cheers herself up before we even need to or Mirio says something witty and she laughs right away. Thus, I am not equip when dealing with women in tears even with both my sister and Hadou as practice or maybe that’s exactly the reason why. Nevertheless, the sight of Yuyu like this is beyond off-putting and I know I have to do something before I cause her anymore distress.

“Hey, don’t be so hard on yourself Yuyu-san. We know you meant no harm” I force myself to look at her without breaking eye contact for five seconds and place my hand on her shoulder.

“Exactly! I just wanted you to know in case you didn’t realize how it was affecting Tamaki. And we’re only human right? We make mistakes and sometimes even to our friends, but we know you and understand that you would never mean it in that way!” Mirio fits both of us soundly in his burly arms and squeezes us in a hug wayyyy too tight and warm. I stretch my arm out to save our drinks in the tray and feel the bag of food brush up against my back.

Yuyu nods her head and Hadou chooses that moment to truly break the rather abrupt turn of events by wind slapping all three of us. “Did I not say no more crying between us???” she shakes her head and Yuyu laughs in between sniffling.

“No. Well, not with me at least and I understand what you guys are saying. I’m just disappointed with myself and how I never considered how you guys felt about it” she says with a small smile. “But thank you Mirio for pointing it out and thank you both for dealing with me. I promise to stop making comments about your friendship! It’s healthy and actually pretty amazing. And yes Nejire, I’ll stop sniffling before you slap us again” she looks at us with a determined glint in her eyes and makes a show of wiping her tears away, so Hadou doesn’t get any ideas.

“Alright!! Let’s get this tradition going and start off the night with the real musical genius of UA, AMAJIKI TAMA--” Mirio announces with vigor and excitement like Present Mic does every Sports Festival, and I turn my head at him in horror. Oh No NO no. I am not singing. My eyes scream at him and he exaggerates the next syllable he’s about to say, while not breaking eye contact with me.

“KI’S BEST FRIEND MIRIOOOOO TOGATA!” he saves, flexing his arms and wiggling his eyebrows at me again. Hadou and Yuyu laugh like they knew he was going to do this all along and I feel extra silly for not seeing that coming.

“Mirio you can’t tell Yuyu to stop teasing me and then do the exact same thing right after” I point out and nudge him with my elbow.

He stops flexing his arms and wraps his left arm around my neck instead. “Roger that, best bro!” he brightens, smile so wide and sunny that my stomach lurches completely winded. Once again, I can’t talk for I fear something excruciatingly embarrassing will come out of my mouth, so I just let him drag me up the stairs and into our room feeling unsettled by how not irritated I actually am.

🎤🎤🎤

Before long, Hadou and Yuyu fuss around with the remote and the speaker settings while Mirio turns on all the disco and strobe lights available. I unpack the aluminum covering our chicken combo and set four plates out along with our chopsticks. I open the lid of our sides, one large white rice, one large fried rice, one large potato wedges and one large macaroni and cheese.

The smell does a glorious thing to all the movement around me, and when I blink my eyes open the three of them huddle along the small table in the room, salivating.

“I know I said I was gonna sing first, but mannnn that chicken smells too damn good to pass on” Mirio takes the seat next to me and takes his chopsticks in hand. Hadou already takes a bite of the potato wedges and Yuyu starts taking some of the fried rice into her plate.

We eat in continued silence, except for the default music that comes with the strobe lights. Yuyu goes out to the front to get us some drinks after we gulped ours down outside due to their ‘no outside drinks policy’ and Mirio takes another huge bite of his third drumstick. Hadou loves cheese and has been munching on the mac and cheese, while I’ve had a little bit of everything.

When Yuyu comes back the guy working at the front comes with her with a large pitcher of soda and plastic cups. Yuyu on the other hand, has four different sets of colored wigs in her hands, a tambourine and sunglasses. Mirio laughs at the sight of the comedian blue wig (completely bald in the middle, but with hair at the sides) and we play Janken (rock paper scissors) to see who will wear what.

We assign the overall winner with the green mohawk wig, then the second place with the neon pink troll wig, the third place with the red pigtails in floating in the air and the last place with the comedian blue wig.

The first round is me vs Yuyu and Hadou vs Mirio. We wipe our hands with the hand sanitizer I bring with me everywhere and then set out to start our mini tournament. I take a deep breath and Yuyu and I start as Mirio and Hadou do the same next to me. After three tries of choosing the same hand, I beat Yuyu’s rock with my paper. Hadou and Mirio play a little longer, but Hadou rises to the challenge and beats Mirio’s scissors with her rock.

Mirio and Yuyu’s shoulders droop down as they realize the mess they’ll have to wear and Hadou and I hi-five each other. The second round ends pretty quickly for both of our teams and I win in the first play beating Hadou’s paper with my scissors. Meanwhile Mirio stumbles in dead last as his scissors get blocked by Yuyu’s rock.

After we finish most of the chicken, we pack the trash into the plastic bag we had the food in, and left the large side of potato wedges and two bits of chicken wings on a spare plate. Hadou busies herself with putting on a bunch of songs and Yuyu sets out to place the comedian blue wig on Mirio. It’s a bit tight and Mirio tries to run away at first, but there’s really nowhere for him to go, especially with Hadou blocking the door, and me and Yuyu holding him down.

I don’t think I’ve ever laugh so much in my life, but Mirio’s half-assed get away and refusal to wear the wig makes it all the more hilarious. I manifest two long chicken wings to trap him because my own arms could never engulf him fully. Yuyu takes that chance to adjust the wig just right, so it hides most of his blonde hair. When she finishes despite Mirio trying to shake her off, we stare at him for 5 seconds before hitting the floor in shock and disbelief. He looks absolutely ridiculous in every possible way and my stomach hurts so bad from laughing at the sight of him.

He tries to flip the blue shoulder length hair getting stuck on his cheeks and Hadou drops the remote from shaking too hard. Mirio turns slightly pink with a particularly goofy smile and when Yuyu hands him a mirror to see what he looks like, he makes a horrified face at his own reflection. We start dying immediately and soon after he joins us on the floor laughing.

Getting Yuyu to put on the red pigtails was not a problem at all, in fact she does it all by herself meanwhile Mirio swings his blue hair back and forth and sings to Barbie girl with the appropriate Ken and Barbie voice. The sight is so funny, I take a video of the whole song despite the small amount of memory I have left on my phone. Then, Yuyu helps Hadou put her long hair in a bun and place the neon pink troll wig on her head. It’s pointless because there’s only so much hair the wig can hide and she ends up leaving her hair down and placing the wig on top.

It’s the most perplexing sight, but Hadou is in her element. She takes the second mic abandoned on the table and tries to belt the notes with Mirio. However, she’s basically screaming with her eyes closed that I can’t actually call it singing. Meanwhile, I just shake the tambourine around, happy to be here and not have to sing at all.

When Yuyu’s favorite song comes on, Mirio hands the mic over to her and her raspy voice gets even raspier when she sings. She gets most of the notes right, which makes Hadou’s screaming less apparent. Mirio takes this time to get the green mohawk wig and arranges it neatly on my head. He’s concentrating so hard with his tongue sticking out at the corner of his lip that I don’t think he’s realize how funny I look.

Hadou finally opening her eyes at the end of the song turns over at us and takes a couple of shots before bursting into a fit of giggles. Yuyu follows suit and Mirio finally looks at me properly and falls back from laughing. I feel the flush suffuse to my cheeks and neck, but for the first time I’m not really embarrassed. I guess this is how Mirio feels when he has successfully made everyone laugh because of some silly thing he did.

“Man we need photos of this! C’mon I’ll put my phone on timer!” Yuyu moves the table aside and stands in front of the couch. She raises her phone, trying to find the best angle that will fit all four of us, while Hadou and Mirio adjust themselves accordingly, so they can be seen and still have room for me to get into the frame.

“OOOh!! Okay this seems to be the best angle. Alright everyone do funny faces!” She calls out and presses the power button which starts the timer at 10 seconds. It blinks 9. 8. 7. I look at Hadou crossing her eyes and sticking out her tongue. Meanwhile, Mirio makes a fishy face with his hands covering his ears and his thumbs sticking out. I glance over at the camera and Yuyu has her mouth slightly ajar as she looks up and has the whites of her eyes peeking out.

3. 2. 1. Not really knowing what to do, I open my mouth wide and stick my head back just in time for the camera to make a loud clicking noise followed by the flash. Yuyu takes the camera down to change the settings of the camera and Hadou laughs at our faces.

“Okay I think we should do 5 seconds this time. Let’s do a rock band pose!” She yells and with that the chaos ensues. Hadou sits on her legs on the couch and does an air guitar pose. Mirio grabs the microphone and screams inaudibly like he’s hit the climactic part of the song. Yuyu uses her right hand to act like she’s smashing on piano keys and I make a run to the grab the chopsticks in the bag, but I don’t make it in time. So, what appears in the photo is a blurry patch of my hair making me seem like I’ve traveled through time. Everyone laughs at my fail and we try a second time with me in the photo this time and pretending to play the drums.

We do a couple more of poses in between actually singing and Mirio keeps us at the edge of our seats when he decides to belt into his favorite rock ballads. Hadou, Yuyu and I share impressed glances as he seriously tackles the intensity of this one particularly heart breaking song. He’s clutching his chest tightly, words hitting close to home and it makes me ache to do something about it. I take my eyes off him, needing a distraction and notice the stray tear Hadou wipes away from her eyes, despite her warning us to stop crying.  

His eyes are closed for most of the song, having already memorized each and every word along with all the rifts the original artist makes, and by the time it’s over we clap and cheer so loud, Mirio reddens in the best way.

“HOLY FUCK TOGATA! WHEN THE HECK DID YOU LEARN TO SING LIKE THAT?” Yuyu shakes the tambourine at him and Hadou slaps his arm.

“Forrealll! Maybe you should be the one competing at the beauty contest! You’d definitely win with that kind of talent!” Hadou keeps slapping his arm in excitement and my stomach ties into infinite knots as he chuckles softly and scratches the back of his head, a little shy and embarrassed.

“Oh geez! You guys just want me to flip my hair again!” He jokes to lighten their zeal, but they’re shoving the microphone back into his hands and entering another song into the machine for him to sing.

“ENCORE ENCORE ENCORE!” Hadou and Yuyu harmonize for once and Mirio sits back down next to me, absolutely overwhelmed by their tenacity. But he gives them what they want and soon, we all sing to a bunch of our childhood pop tunes.

Even I find myself singing softly underneath Hadou’s yelling, Yuyu’s raspy rocker voice and Mirio’s spellbinding singing. I know they can hear me because they suddenly have stopped singing so loud, but the lack of comment gives me courage to continue on and share this moment with them.

🦋🦋🦋

We come home late that day because Mirio and I walk Hadou and Yuyu home, both to make sure they’re safe and also to prolong the inevitable family reunion. I know we’re all thinking it, but we pass the time with more teasing and pose reenactments from the earlier karaoke mess. It’s light and funny and by the time Mirio drops me off with another tight hug, I don’t feel as bad as I know I should.

When I open the front door to my house, my family tries their best to act normal. My mom even attempts at scolding me for coming home after curfew, but it sounds forced and like she thinks I’ll break any minute. My dad just silently prepares me some hot tea and my sister keeps her door open in case I want to come in to her room and not be alone.

It’s weird because I know I should feel sad and disappointed, but the me now isn’t really feeling sad at all. All I can think about is how fun it was to sing with the gang and how close we actually have gotten within a year. It’s like we’ve poured all our misery away and there’s nothing left, but all the good memories we made afterwards. But my house feels like it’s 7 hours behind, bringing me back to the time I was still hiding in the classroom and letting my mind get the better of me. Torn between letting it go or letting it sit on my mind, I take a nice long shower and not think about anything at all.

By the time I’m out of the shower, I see all the notifications Yuyu has sent to our group chat and wipe my hair dry before climbing into bed. I click on our chat and a bunch of our group selfies show up. I look at each one and laugh so hard I choke on my own saliva. There’s one with Yuyu, Hadou and Mirio posing like Charlie’s Angels that just melts the last bits of uncertainty in my mind.

Hadou and Mirio send their stolen moments as well and I do the same, checking off the four photos I manage to take. Then, I spot the video of Mirio flipping his hair back and forth to Barbie Girl and the encore love song he sings to appraise Hadou’s dying request. Just thinking about the way he fills each line with such agony and passion makes me feel funny again. But, before I think myself out of it, I press play anyway and fall asleep to the thought of how it would actually feel to be in love.

Part 1 2 3 of 5

I LIVEEE. lol. I know it’s been a hot minute, but I kinda fell into a funk and the first few drafts for this chapter felt too forced to continue. So, I took a break and started doodling around. And before I knew it, the itch to continue the story came and this long chappie was made. As always, I’d love to hear from you guys and hope you enjoy this next installment. Thank you very much and I hope you guys have a wonderful holiday season🎄

[thunder-birb]

Hey guys, so I just wanted to give an update since I don’t know what’s gonna happen to this site after the 17th (with all the new regulations & stuff) and I know some people are planning on leaving the site altogether. And if you are one of those people, I do have an Ao3 account if anyone wants to continue to read the story without using this platform. I will be updating both for new chapters and future works, so please check it out!

[thunder-birb]

The 5 times Tamaki accidentally confessed to Mirio and the one time he didn’t have to

Mini Series Part III

3.

I clutch the white envelope tightly in my hands, trying to think of anything else, but the red UA wax seal beckoning me to rip the thing open and see what it says. Mirio and I promised we would open it together, but Mirio also told his dad he would wait until he comes home from work. So, here I am pacing back and forth in my room, trying to hold on to the part of me that is refusing to freak out.

But let’s be honest, I’m never really good at that and after countless of hours practicing in my room, Mirio’s room, Mirio’s living room, the park, Mirio dad’s room, the gym after school and even at the Ramen stall- you get my point, the pressure just builds up that even my regular breathing exercises aren’t working anymore. So, I throw the envelope on the floor and crash face first on my bed. I stay there not trying to think of anything at all, but okay maybe just one thing--memory of my parents taking my oneechan, Mirio and I to a butterfly sanctuary.

My sister was actually the one who loved them to death--well that was until I saw them, as they fluttered about and chased the patches of sunlight that reflected from the diamond shaped glass of the translucent ceiling above us. It was spellbinding to watch how they lifted off a flower’s petals and spread their wings for take off. Their wings looked unreal and moved with a grace of elegance that I wished I had an ounce of.

It was unlike any time I visited conservatories or zoos with my family and the best part was when one of them even stopped to rest on my shoulder. It was black and purple and had yellow dots aligned at the edge of its wings. I only realized it was  sitting on me because Mirio happily snapped a picture on his phone and saved it as my profile photo.

The little one stayed with me for half of our journey around the glass house until it decided to plop for a minute on Mirio’s hair probably thought it was some variation of the sunlight like a couple of the butterflies did and then, it went on its merry way up the various flowers that encircled the stone pathways.

I also took a couple of shots on my phone and one of favorites was when a bunch of the butterflies hovered around Mirio and my sister as they merrily spun around them. It was blurry and out of focus, but that smile was there and I wish we were there now, so--

The affable sound of a seasoned guitarist plucking note after note to announce the arrival of the sun resonates in my room and my phone lights up from my computer desk. I let the first verse play out somehow finding solace in the soothing familiarity of the song and then, slowly make my way over there.

It’s crazy because just a minute ago, I was dying to know what the letter would say, but now that I am actually about to open it, I can’t imagine reading what it says inside. The unbearable wait has turned on me and now I don’t want to know at all. Yet, I pick up the call anyway because Mirio’s smiling face with the amiable butterflies is on my phone screen and I really need to talk to someone before I drive myself insane, favorably him.

“Oh good you answered! I was starting to worry and thought all the waiting around was gonna drive you mad…no offense” he adds careful and I almost laugh because he totally guessed that right.

“Too late, but now that you’re calling I actually don’t want to know and have decided to just live in my room until I die” l lean back on my black desk chair and tilt my head up to stare off at my glow in the dark solar system set plastered across my ceiling. Mirio thinks it will help distract me when I can’t sleep at night.

“Tamaki~” Mirio has this teasing way of calling my name, which I have no idea where it comes from or why he suddenly uses it, but it disarms me right away and I groan at him because I can never properly speak afterwards. “We made a promise and I would never let you rot in your room when you could be going to hero class with me” Mirio replies in such a way that I can picture him winking at me, all cool and sanguine because he’s just never been a downbeat kind of guy.

“Do I have to?” I cringe at how small my voice comes out, but even after all these years of knowing me, Mirio never sees it as a weakness. He thinks I’m brave for always speaking my mind when I’m with him, disregarding the fact that he’s really the valiant one for doing so in front of everyone.

“Well technically no. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to. And I can wait. I don’t think I could cross this milestone without you” he replies back and honestly what do you even say to that? It’s not that he is intentionally manipulating me to open the letter because Mirio is not an unscrupulous sort. Far from it actually because he genuinely means every nice damn word he says and it’s absolutely maddening. But is also why everyone likes him.

“No, you’re right. I would never even have the guts to go after my goal of becoming a hero if you weren’t there believing in me every step of the way, so yeah. I guess I’m as ready as I’ll ever be” I say with my right hand clutching my shirt right above my heart, feeling it beat wild with resolution.

“And there you go proving just how fearless you truly are! Tamaki you’re courageous in your own way and let’s get to ripping this envelope up before you change your mind!” he laughs and I chuckle along with him because he’s right again. My bravery definitely has a time limit.

“Alright. Countdown?” I prepare myself and grab the envelope on the floor, shaking a little as I bend to retrieve it. I stand up, but then plop back down on the floor, deciding no matter what the letter says, it’s best to be on the floor already, then fall on my face from shock.

“You know it!” Mirio replies and I can picture him punching the air for emphasis.

“3-   2-   1-   GO!!!” We sort of scream and so does every cell in my body. I rest my phone in between my cheek and shoulder, while I tear the envelope open and nervously take out a gray circular device inside.

The thing lights up as soon as I place it on the floor and a holographic screen appears in front of me. Principal Nezu pops up with a friendly wave, paws moving left to right. My eyes travel to his projection and the green blackboard in the background.

“Hello Amajiki, Tamaki-san. As I am aware of your anxiety, I wanted to get straight to the point and congratulate you on being accepted into UA. If you look behind me we have listed your points during the Practical Exam as well as the Written Exam. You have demonstrated--” he continues to say more and even starts playing a video of my performance, but I could not hear anything past: You have been accepted into UA.

                                                        I GOT IN

                                                 I GOT IN TO UA

“AHHHHHHHHHHHHH” Mirio joyously yells on the phone and I readily scream with him. “TAMAKI YOU DID IT! Man I’m so proud of you! Principal Nezu is still showing me videos, so I started listening to what he was saying to you instead, but wait-- he’s about to---Ohmygod. OHMYGOD WE’RE GOING TO UA TOGETHER TAMAKI WE’RE GONNA BE HEROES!” he rambles even louder as I hear Principal Nezu congratulate him on the other end of the line.

Then, I hear his dad yelling with us and a loud smack, followed by more screaming and an “Oh crap Dad! My phone!” I want to laugh because I’m sure Mirio’s dad has tried picking him up again, forgetting how big Mirio has gotten and they’re probably sprawled out on the floor while his phone takes a fall. But I’m so overwhelmed with my own feelings that the wet tears continuously slide across my face and goes all the way down to my hoodie. All the tension living like a parasite in my heart spills out, leaving me bare and finally free.

           I actually made it! Me. Nervous energy Tamaki... This is crazy!

It does not take long before my sister comes into my room and sees me on the floor with my face wet from tears and the phone still pressed against my cheeks. Mirio and his dad are blasting party music on the other line and I can’t find it in me to separate from their buzzing energy just yet. She hurries by my side, probably worried, but she spots the letter from UA and the holograph of Principal Nezu.

So, she grabs the circular device knowing I won’t be able to speak no matter what the result and presses the middle button for it to play all over again. It starts with Principal Nezu greeting me  and then he segways into congratulating me for my admission to UA high school. She freezes upon hearing the news, turns her head at me, eyes wide with realization and soon enough she too, is screaming and hugging me so tight it is the only thing stopping me from floating away in a happy daze.

“TAMAKI!! YOU GOT IN!!” she screams into my ear and the phone that’s keeping me connected to Mirio and his dad, eyes welling up with tears. We all continue to yell because I don’t think we know any other way to react to such good news. They’ve seen us, day after day; with me eating and manifesting as many features as I can at the same time and Mirio with all his bruises from getting his face, arms, fingers, legs, chest and various body parts stuck in walls, doors, and windows of every kind. Every failure is another push to work harder and finally we have earned our first step.

“This calls for a celebration! I am calling your parents!” Mirio’s dad yells into the phone and my sister replies for me because yeah I still can’t form proper words.

                                                        🐙🐙🐙

After more frantic screaming and tight hugging, my mother calls all of my close living relatives and proceeds to plan a party with Mirio’s dad. It’s supposed to be a “small impromptu gathering” with my family and Mirio’s family, but that doesn’t stop it from being completely embarrassing and usually I would want no part of it. Yet, having the validation that my dream is an actually possibility even with someone as anxious and meticulous as me, just feels too good that I could hardly care.

My sister hands me a flower crown she’s made for me as a surprise with a purple paper butterfly in the middle. I start crying all over again because she’s really too nice sometimes, even though I just fidget and worry all the time. I hug her in gratitude and she messes up my hair in return, while calling me a crybaby. I hug her even tighter in retaliation and help my parents prepare the table, while she pushes me away to order a bunch of food.

In exactly 45 minutes, my obachan and ojichan come over to the house, followed by my aunts, uncles and cousins. The house is so full of people, I can’t imagine Mirio’s family fitting in somehow. But that is where I am wrong because Mirio’s dad and uncles come through the door with a large cake filled with sparkling candles, bottles of sake and all accompanied by their exuberant and excessively loud singing voices making the whole place light up like the Christmas markets in the city.

The Togata’s are like the happiest people you’ll ever meet. Just picture a bunch of Mirio’s entering a room each with a big smile on their faces and a skip in their step. They give off this brightness unlike I’ve ever seen before and each room is now booming with Mirio’s rich laughter and that captivating gleam in their button eyes.

It’s almost too much for me, so I keep my hoodie on and try not to be in a room with more than one of them, despite how they all approach me and trap me in the Togata’s infamous bear hugs.

I just want to be stuck with the actual Mirio Togata, but he’s being congratulated, picked up (without much success) and kissed by his family and mine. So, it’s been really hard to talk to him alone.

My sister also hands him a flower crown with a cut out paper Sun on it and he envelopes her in a bear hug shocker to show his gratitude. She laughs, looking so tiny in Mirio’s arms and now my little cousins hovering around them want to be picked up too. Mirio chuckles at the small hands tugging at his pant leg and proceeds to pick every single one of them up. I swear my family members are suckers for the Togata’s. There’s just something about them that’s hard not to like.

Then, things get more loud as the food finally arrives. Mirio’s dad keeps handing Mirio and I shots of sake to celebrate, which is only happening in the first place because my mom is not in the room and it’s really hard to say no to Mirio’s dad. I’m also sure it has something to do with the shots he has been sliding my otosaan’s way and how it’s making him forego his trademark austere nature and start singing a song to my mom, who is actually my uncle next to him.

“To our boys! After all their hard work and endless training sessions, they’ve finally made it one step closer to their dreams! Let this be an inspiration to all of us to never give up and go beyond! Say it with me now- PLUS” Mirio’s dad raises his glass, beaming like he did when Mirio could fully phase through a wall; so proud and like nothing could be greater than watching his son live out his dreams.

“ULTRA!” we all scream and I realize then that this is just as much about our family as it is about us. So, I take the shots less suspiciously, even though by the 3rd one, I feel a sudden rush of heat on my face, my back and my ears. It’s a weird sensation, especially since it’s not caused by my overthinking. It’s also making me slightly drowsy and lighter? I don’t know, I just feel like I could probably handle another shot or two and woah does takoyaki always look so-- round???

One of my cousins call out my name and I get up before my limbs are ready, so I stumble a little bit and then a lot. But, I somehow get up the third time, the second time was a mistake, give my uncles a couple of hi-fives because one is nearly not enough and all without tripping over myself, which is a feat that feels so great, I just have to go tell my mom in the kitchen.

However, the way to the kitchen seems a lot further than I remember, but if I can make it this far in life, then I sure as hell can walk to the kitchen; is what I thought at first, but man the way there feels like I’m on a suspension bridge with my mischievous cousins jumping at the far end. I also don’t quite remember why I’m walking this way anymore, so I take a quick detour to my room, which is so much closer.

I open the door to my room, take in the darkness, except for the stars glowing above and smile, realizing this must be what I wanted all along. I make long strides to reach my bed, bumping into a couple of things along the way and just as I am about to get there, I slip on my blanket, which is somehow on my bedroom floor.

The crash is loud and I have to shake my head a couple of times to stop the dizzying waves messing with my inner ear. I press my right hand on my forehead, slowly regaining the rational part of my brain back and use my left hand to push hard against the floor, hoping to pull myself up. But, the ground feels odd and warmer than it usually is, so I open my eyes and realize that there’s actually a person there, covered in my blanket.

I blink my eyes open and close a couple of times to make sure I’m not making any of this up and surely enough, I’m right. There is a human huddled under my blanket on my bedroom floor. I slowly drag the blanket down, curious to know who could it be when I see a familiar face covered in messy blonde hair, completely dead to the conscious world.

“Mi--” He turns over to my side before I could finish and grabs a handful of my blanket. Once he finishes fully covering his chest, he stays completely still and then, begins to snore lightly. His face is flushed in a deep red, all the way down to his neck and even his ears. I can feel the heat he is radiating and somehow that brings the color back to my face, too. I crouch lower, moving my face closer to his and watch his long hair fall into place, concealing most of his left cheek and eyes.

It takes all of my control not to poke him and ask why he’s on my floor when there’s a bed right next to us or move his hair out of his face. But, he looks so peaceful and settled in, and it just seems wrong to steal the bits of sleep he can finally have after our rigorous training. Not only did we have physical exercises, but also long study sessions, which he finds hard to concentrate on.

“So...Whatcha doing over there?” I spin my head towards the door and there stands my sister with a vexatious smirk growing bigger by the second that screams evil intent and could probably cause my demise.

My face reddens and I hurriedly jerk away from Mirio, scared that my sister will comment on how close I was to his face. “Not---nothing” I muster staring hard at my fingers and pray that she will be nice and not make any ridiculous observations.

“Maji? Because it looks like you’re about to eat a snack the way you’re eyeing Togata down there. I mean who can resist those muscles, amiright? It’s like they grew overnight!” she giggles, winking at me and I crumble.

“What-- NO I-- SHUT UP! Mirio’s my friend and--” I struggle to say something cohesive and not air out the panic ensuing in my mind, but it’s evident that I’m freaking the hell out.

“Okay, okay-- Easy there. Just teasing” she comes forward, looking a little concerned- “You might wanna wipe off that drool on your face if you’re gonna convince me otherwise” she sits on my desk chair, turning it around to face me and breaks into another laughing fit, as I reflexively move my hand up.

She’s snickering louder now and I fake like I am reaching for my hoodie, so I can cover my face. Judging by the way she is still laughing at me, she clearly doesn’t buy it and I sit there feeling so stupid and small in my own room running away from a party that is actually for me. I should’ve just went to the kitchen like I initially planned. Why did I come here?!

Then, to make matters worse, the door burst open and I’m beginning to question how I could possibly hear this and not my sister come in. Mirio’s dad walks through, footsteps loud and determined and I immediately see the obvious difference between them. She’s evil and up to no good, while he’s concerned and--

“Oh heyyyyy, there they are! And woah Mirio’s passed out isn’t he?” his dad approaches us, crouches down on the floor and ruffles his son’s hair out of his face with a fond smile. “I shouldn’t have sneaked him a few drinks before getting here, but I’m just so happy for him you know?” he continues to pat Mirio’s head, settling in the spot I was in earlier before my sister decided to kill me with her words.

“He’s like- the best thing I have going for me and---oh god! Here comes the dad tears” he laughs sounding just like Mirio.

“Sorry I’m such a sap” he apologizes as his eyes well up even more and the tears start falling on his cheeks. He sniffles loud and unconcerned, then he pulls the blanket up to Mirio’s chin. “Wake him up in 10 mins okay? I think we should start heading out before I get properly hammered too” he looks at Mirio one last time before he turns and gives me a hug, too.

“So proud of you both” his eyes are still watery and he ruffles my hair, before getting up, smiling at my sister and then closing the door.

I make a move to stand up, but my sister has other plans and directs the desk chair even closer towards me. She smirks again and I know she’s going to ruin that sweet moment just by the glint in her eyes. “Yeah Tamaki, wake him up in 10 minutes after you finish tracing his muscles with your fingertips” she teases and that’s it. I cannot be blamed for this. I manifest my arms into tentacles from the takoyaki I ate earlier and lift my sister off the chair.

She screams in terror, swinging her arms and legs around that I start to lose my anger a little bit and kind of second guess this. They’re going to hear us and come in here. Then, they’re going to think she did something to me, which is why I’m torturing her. After that, they’ll start asking us questions and I really don’t want to have to explain why.

In the midst of her yelling to be free and my consciousness spiraling into a black hole of terrorizing confusing emotions, I feel the blanket hover over my feet.

“Hey guys---” Mirio slurs as he slowly opens his eyes and looks at my sister up in the air and then at me. “Am I dreaming or is your sister floating in the air? I didn’t know she had two quirks” Mirio scratches his head and tries getting up, but his knees wobble and he falls.

Without even thinking about it, my left arm-tentacles reflexively lets go of my sister and tries to catch Mirio before he hits the floor. I have a strong hold on both, but Mirio weighs nothing like my sister, so I put her down near my bed and swing my right arm-tentacles over to Mirio to keep him up.

I move my foot back to get some space between us, but trip on the freaking blanket I forgot is still there and we go down. My sister tries to save us, but it’s too late and I plummet on the floor butt first. I groan, turning on my side, so my butt isn’t pressed against the floor and curse this descend to hell. Why does something bad always happens?

I open my eyes to glare hard at my sister, finding it easy to blame her for my pain, but then big warm arms are quick to wrap around the small of my back and pull me to an even wider and cozier chest.

I freeze, mind blank and heart pounding so hard against Miro’s. I slowly look up and Mirio has the most confused look on his face like he doesn’t understand how I even got there when he is the one who pulled me in. Wrinkles are forming on his forehead; a look he only has when he’s thinking really hard, which is rare and I want to make it go away, but my body is too busy buzzing with electricity to function.

“Tamaki--” his eyes widen and I gulp forgetting my sister is still in the room and now has more ammunition to torture me with for the rest of my life. “Did you know your eyes are purple-- like a really deep purple?” he smiles like he just discovered something monumental and not a fact everyone already knows. Great. He’s still being victimized by alcohol then--what with the number of drinks his dad probably gave him before the party and then after I wouldn’t be-

“Wooooshhhh~~~ woooooshhhh~~~~” He starts playing with my hair while making those sound effects as he goes. He’s getting really carried away and my hair’s becoming more tangled up like it isn’t a mess to begin with and I groan in perpetual suffering.

“Haha! Dude your hair is so messy! You should use a comb more often” he laughs like it’s not his fault it’s in this state and my sister giggles in the background. Mirio doesn’t seem to hear her and lifts my head up, so we’re at eye level. He inspects his work further, turning my head to the left and then to the right.

“Yup, it's definitely like the bird’s nest we found at the school yard that one time” he adds and then tucks my head against the crevice of his neck, while chirping like a freaking bird. Drunk Mirio is a mess.

“Mi--Mirio please let me go” I struggle against his arms, fighting for escape. “Mirio I can’t breathe like this” I try again since his hold is only tightening, the more I try to break free.

Mirio finally loosens his embrace and I make the mistake of looking at him because now his eyes are blown wide and lips pouting into a very dejected “kicked-puppy” look. “Do you not like me anymore Tamaki? Am I too lame to be your friend, now that you got in to UA?” he asks, frown creasing deeper, which makes no sense at all since he got in too, but KOs all my ability to breathe anyway.

“Yeah Tamaki, are we not cool enough for you?” my sister chimes in and I just want to jump over there and kick her in the shin, but I can kick her any time. Mirio’s fears though have to be addressed now, even in his drunken state.

“Mirio, no that’s not--”

“It’s okay if you don’t want to hang out with me. I wouldn’t want to hinder your progress. You’re doing so well with manifesting and handling your nerves these days that I couldn’t be prouder! Meanwhile, I can’t even phase through things for long and I take so much time too! Anyone can just strike at me and bam, I’d be done for!” he laughs, but it sounds so sad and resolute that I want to kick my own shin for making him say those things or think any of that stuff is close to the truth.

“Mirio listen to me-” I grab his face and dammit his eyes are so despondent, but I gulp down my nerves and forge on.

“You’re amazing! No one I know works harder than you do and deserves to be a hero! You don’t just help others out, but you also inspire them to keep fighting! You’re the brightest star of all Mirio, that’s why you got in to UA, or why everyone likes to hang around you or why I--- why I-- um-- you’re my--- I mean you’re the sun! You light up the world” I barely make it out and panic as soon as I finish because I know Mirio is probably too drunk to notice my slip up, but my sister surely will. And she’s definitely going to make my life miserable, especially since I lifted her off the chair.

I shut my eyes, shaking from embarrassment and slowly ease myself away from him. So, I can run away and hide in the bathroom forever.

“Tamaki, you’re way too nice to me I swear! But thank you man! You’re such a good friend” Mirio hugs me tighter before I can evade him, rubbing the tip of his nose against mine and my sister is now rolling on the floor laughing like a mad woman. Man, I should’ve kicked her when I could’ve. I try to manifest my leg to retaliate, but nothing happens and the door bursts open again. Doesn’t anyone know how to knock anymore?!

“Tamaki, is Mirio awake? His dad-” my aunt pauses as she comes in, and then my mom hurries past her, leaving the door wide open.

“It’s fine now.” Mirio yells, voice suddenly very deep, which turns all of the attention towards us not that it already isn’t.

“Why you ask? Because I. AM. HEREEE!” Mirio declares as he rises from the floor, raising me up like a freaking sacrificial offering with a big smile on his goofy face. And that’s all it takes for my mom, aunt and sister to howl with laughter.

                                                      Mirio, why

This eventually catches everyone’s attention, mostly because my door is wide open and the fact that my sister and aunt are smacking the floor from laughing too hard. So naturally, everybody else starts peaking in and soon they, too double up with laughter at how drunk Mirio is.

Then, my cousin has the brilliant idea of taking out his phone and starts taking pictures of us with me still up in the air completely mortified because; for one Mirio is drunk and we might fall afreakinggain and also this may be the worst moment of my entire existence. And now there is evidence for the whole family to bring up at any inconvenient time. Awesome.

Mirio’s dad joins in too. Both in taking photos and being in the photos, as he raises his arms next to Mirio screaming “Plus Ultra.” I bury my head deep into my hoodie and slip down from Mirio’s arms when the fatigue has finally caught up to him. I quickly descend to the floor and make a mad dash to the bathroom, locking myself in and refusing to come out. Small gathering they said. It will be a nice time they said. This is the absolute worst.

Part 1 2 of 5

Part 3 is uppp! Pardon the monstrosity that is this chapter hence the read more break off, especially compared to the humble beginnings that is the first chappie. I honestly don’t know what happened. This could even be a stand alone one shot... and I have a feeling the rest might be more or less long like this one, so yay us? Also, there might be errors here and there, but I was starting to get impatient and will scrupulously edit it again later. Thanks once again and I hope you hold out for the other 3 chapters coming up soon~

[thunder-birb]

The 5 times Tamaki accidentally confessed to Mirio and the one time he didn’t have to

Mini Series Part II 

2.

“Tamaki! Hey! I hope you don’t mind me joining you” The familiar weight of Mirio, nudging against my shoulder for the briefest of moments and then preceding to scoot a few inches away from me to give me some space; is one of the nicest, most unassuming gestures anyone has done for me. Most people like my parents, sister and even some of our teachers presume that they know exactly what I need when I’m feeling clammed up or nervous. However, that usually takes a turn for the worse and the guilt of making everyone worry about me always elevates my anxiety.

That’s why most people have resigned to not doing anything at all. And in most circumstances, I would actually prefer this method, but there are those moments in which being alone is the worse possible decision I have ever made in my life. Because then, nothing hinders my mind from spiralling into a poisonous cycle of crippling vitriolic thoughts.

Enter Mirio Togata. He has witnessed a fair share of my anxiety spells and usually lets the ‘capable adults’ deal with it. However, when it is just the two of us, Mirio has the brightest idea of all and simply asks me what I need. No one and I mean no one, has ever done that approach and through many incidents, I learned, just as much as Mirio, that I actually don’t like being by myself when it happens.

It still doesn’t mean I also want to be enveloped with attention either. That just makes me feel suffocated, cornered and incapable of handling my own emotions. So, Mirio does what he does best and just stays by me instead. He lays on the grass when we’re outside at the park or watches Television when we’re sitting in his couch or continues to read his favorite comic; ready to talk about it if I need to or not say anything at all.

He gives me the space I need to pull myself together again and does not try to fix what isn’t his to solve.

Today is one of those days and surely enough Mirio is laying on the grass next to me by the soccer field, his school jacket bunched up together as his makeshift pillow with pocky in his mouth and a new manga volume he’s been dying to read. He’s really into his manga that he doesn’t even notice me watching him; observing how he’s almost finished his first box of pocky all by himself. Or how he’s been tapping his white sneakers to the beat of another one of his favorite rock ballads. Sometimes he even starts humming absentmindedly, but I get too nervous to ask him what he’s actually singing in case it embarrasses him and I’ll never hear him humm again.

“Hey, you’re back. Everything alright?” He stops tapping his foot and drops the manga to his chest. Then, he places his hands behind his head and turns to peer at me, blue button eyes shining in the sunlight reflecting the ocean-like hues of the sky above.

“Yeah… It’s just-- Everyone always expects something from me. The teachers, the students, my parents and I can never give them what they want. I can’t even manifest anything more than a lousy bud, but they still want more just because I lucked out and got a really ‘cool quirk.’ Too bad I’m terrible at everything I do and-- ” I start to explain, but the feelings of disappointment and frustration begin to flood my consciousness and I just don’t want to go back to the gym with everyone’s eyes on me.

I shake my head and tightly shut my eyes, trying not to think about how I could not for the life of me do anything worthy of my quirk. Not with everyone watching, eyes heavy with anticipation, making me short of breath and prickling with nerves that I know I’m visibly shaking.

Just Breathe. In. Out. In. Out. In.

And that’s when he starts singing. No longer only to himself.

“Here are days where things don’t go well

But even in the scarce light filtering through the leaves

I can still feel the same sun

Even if it’s a dream where I’m covered in snow

I will keep going your way

I believe I will go walking this road

So as not to lose my way”

It’s almost a crime that Mirio can actually belt a note without sounding like a seal. I already can’t see his flaws as flaws, but silly attributes or even as quirks before that became the national term for our mutations. So naturally, everything good about him unsettles every fiber of my body, but in a crazy good way. Too good that I feel like I might throw up sometimes.

“Oh man! Sorry you had to hear that!” He laughs, the rich kind that’s a little exaggerated at the end to show he’s starting to get self-conscious. “I was only gonna sing a line or two, but that song just really gets me going you know? And I figure maybe it can help you, too” Mirio pinks a little bit, which does further damage to my Broca area that I could no longer speak or look at him without physically hurting from his brightness.

“That bad huh? I’m sorry Tamaki! As a hero I will do everyone’s ears a favor and never sing again!” he laughs, self-awareness out the window and resigns to looking up at the sky.

☀️☀️☀️

I don’t know exactly how many minutes we spend laying in complete silence, watching the cottony clouds take form and float by like strangers in passing at the crosswalk, but it settles the last bits of my nerves. Mirio proceeds to point out really rad looking cloud shapes, and swears one even looks like a bowl of ramen. I chuckle not seeing it at all, but Mirio insists and surely enough so does his stomach as it growls particularly loud and hangry.

We turn our heads at the same time and laugh so hard my cheeks starts to hurt. I try to avoid Mirio’s face because now both my stomach and cheek muscles are starting to tighten, but it’s so hard to resist looking when he’s smiling so vividly that his ears are turning pink. In an attempt to stop, he gets up, but somehow trips on the way up and falls on his bum.

We laugh even harder and now I really have to stop. My face is turning red from straining itself and the pain is getting unbearable, so I start doing the breathing exercises my sister advises I practice. I am so caught up in centering myself, I don’t notice Mirio get up, put his jacket back on, throw his trash in the bin and stash his manga back in his duffel bag. He has his hand out for me by the time I open my eyes and I gulp down the nerves attempting to choke me up. Wow his face is real close and ears still a little rosy.

“C’mon Tamaki! Let’s get some food!” He suggests and I nod, shying away from his gaze as he kindly pulls me up. I bite down on my lip, trying to gain some control of myself and we head to the night market Mirio frequents.

The smell of beef, barbeque, and fried seafood of every kind has us salivating and we make quick steps towards his favorite stand. The old man greets us with his signature smile and Mirio makes small talk as he does with everyone. After ordering, we sit at our usual spot at the far right end of the stall and start devouring our noodles the moment the Ojichan hands it to us.

We finish our food quickly as if we have not eaten the whole day and by the time we clean our bowl, I feel so full, so happy and like I can do anything.

“Hey Mirio, watch this!” I call his attention and manifest my left arm into the noodles we just ate. It’s stupid and spontaneous and I don’t even really think it’ll work, but Mirio’s jaw drops so low I immediately howl with laughter with my noodle arm (it really worked!) smacking the table. Mirio almost slides off his chair from laughing too much as I continue to flail my noodle arms around. But, eventually everyone starts noticing and we huddle closer in secret. It can’t stop us from playing around too much though and ultimately we are escorted out as usual because we are starting to bother the obachans.

🐙🐙🐙

The walk home feels light and the incident earlier today feels so far away and minor when usually I spend the rest of the time replaying the worst bits of it. But not tonight and we fall into step, strolling through the familiar streets, while Mirio starts humming again. I listen to the melody and realize that it’s definitely the ballad he sang earlier. I get lost in it, crossing the roads in routine that I don’t notice we’re standing in front of my house and how he’s stopped humming for some time now.

“Well I’ll see you tomorrow Tamaki! Goodnight~” Mirio waits until I look at him, then squeezes my shoulder and smiles in that way that he does that I couldn’t help the small groan that escapes my throat.

“Goodnight Mirio! Get home safely” I mumble, opening the gate and hurrying through, but then I stop in my tracks and go back outside. It just wouldn’t be right not to tell him. “Mirio wait--” I yell, hoping he isn’t too far away and then he turns his head to look at me.

“Did you forget--”

“You have a great voice!” I yell back trying to hold on to the sudden burst of bravery subduing my innately antsy nature. 

“I mean everything you do is pretty much incredible-” No. Did I just say that out loud?? Crap damage control say something anythingggg “--and uh---I-- I know you’ll master your quirk soon enough too!” word vomit once again takes over me and I’m so freaking nervous after saying that out loud baka baka baka that I keep my head down, shaking worst than earlier. This was a mistake.

“Tamaki, you really overestimate me!” he says back and I slowly lift my head, stopping just below his mouth. “But I always appreciate your kind words of encouragement and if anyone was awesome today, it would be you Noodle Arms! Now that’s cool!” Mirio wiggles his arms around in demonstration even crouching a little so, I see it in my line of vision. Then, soon enough I can’t help, but smile at him and his permeating warmth and enigmatic way of uplifting any bad situation like a real pro hero.

“Say hello to your family for me!” He waves one last time and then turns back to cross the street. I watch him until I can no longer see the blonde hair from afar, just soaking up all the brightness now that it’s at a safe distance from me.

“Tamaki! What did I say about hanging around outside at this time of the night?” my okaasan yells from the front door and I quickly make my way inside. “You know you could just invite him over if you don’t wanna say bye just yet” My mom suggests and I squeak, run past her and head straight to my room.

“Tamaki wait! You have to eat---” was the last I heard before I blast my music, wrap my body in all of my blankets and fall fast asleep from the warmth of the day.

Part 1 of 5

And here is Part II! Thanks to all who have read and liked the story. It really means a lot to me and if anyone is wondering, the song Mirio sang is Yume no Tsubomi by Remioromen (which is the band his Hero name partly came from, if I’m not mistaken). Thanks again and I hope you enjoy this just as much as the first part ^^

[thunder-birb]

The 5 times Tamaki accidentally confessed to Mirio and the one time he didn’t have to.

Mini Series Part I

1.

The first time it happened was when we were in third grade and had finally fallen into a routine of after school homework/hangout sessions. At first my okaasan was worried sick at the prospect of her anxious son (me) hanging out with a classmate, much more ‘that blonde kid with the eyes’ again. Yet, I was insistent and even more so was the ‘blonde boy’ who charmed his way into my sister’s good graces and my father’s much more phlegmatic demeanor. How Mirio managed to make any and every person he came across laugh so hard their cheeks hurt will always be a puzzle to me, but in this particular case I was grateful.

“You think your mom will ever warm up to me?” Mirio thoughtfully asked as we laid out our textbooks, brightly colored pens (thanks to Mirio’s plea for more color to keep himself focused on his notes...not that it really worked), and papers.

“She likes you! She just---worries about me too much” I quickly dismissed his doubt, since it was unlike Mirio to overthink about something and honestly, I was nervous enough between the two of us for him to suddenly start.

“Hmm--- I guess you’re right. I just can’t help wondering how my mom would think of me now if my parents didn’t get a divorce. And since she’s the closest mother figure I know of, I have this weird feeling that insists she has to like me, too” Mirio flat out replied without any harbinger of hesitation that I froze in the spot unable to grasp how easy it was for him to be so vulnerable in front of someone anyone. Meanwhile, I couldn’t even introduce myself in front of my class without stammering on every single syllable I was trying to say.

I scrambled my brain for something to say that wasn’t a lame I’m sorry or of course she’d love you fake-ness, because Mirio didn’t deserve some half ass reply. He deserved the honest to All Might truth and I could at least to do this much for him.

“I think she’d be--” I wasn’t able to finish this heartfelt monologue I went over and over in my head to reassure Mirio how he was the nicest kid ever for even acknowledging and befriending a loser like me because suddenly Mirio was screaming my name and his body was slowly disappearing into the floor. “MIRIO!” I yelled back trying to grab a hold of his flailing arms as his lower half vanished, white shirt flew up to the ceiling and for the first time in my life I felt like I’d actually pass out from fear.

“TAMAKI!!” Mirio cried even louder and somehow managed to hold onto me. I immediately pulled him up and somehow in the midst of his panic, Mirio deactivated his quirk. We crashed on the floor hard with Mirio’s arms wrapped tightly around my waist and a loud thud echoed throughout Mirio’s living room, reassuring me that Mirio wasn’t going anywhere he shouldn’t.

I huffed out loud, trying to bring some needed oxygen in my lungs and held onto Mirio’s arms for dear life. It was then I heard muffled cries and realized Mirio was in tears. I quickly sat up and encircled Mirio with my arms just like he would when those older kids would keep pestering me about my quirk. Nothing felt safer than a warm hug and Mirio, bright as the sun always gave the best ones. So naturally it was my turn to return the favor and give him at least a dose of the comfort he usually shared with me.

“Mirio it’s okay. Everything is going to be alright. I’m here” I patted his head like my mom would when I started to cry and suddenly a snotty chuckle filled the tense room. I loosened my hug a bit and looked at Mirio. He was wiping the tears away and started to laugh even harder when I stared at him. Confused, but relieved Mirio was okay, I started catching the laughing bug especially with a laugh as boisterous as Mirio’s and the crazy tension from the accident just drifted away.

“Tamaki sounded just like All Might that I couldn’t stop laughing!” he explained much later to his dad after he came back from work. Meanwhile Mirio’s dad held onto him so tight afraid he’ll lose Mirio again by some freak accident.

Then, he did the same to my parents as he walked them to the gate. He reanimated the story of how I saved him full with descriptions that were unlike me in any setting, but Mirio was so happy and my stomach felt like it was twisting itself into tiny knots of flutters. I just wanted to make him stop, but when I looked up, my mom was beaming at Mirio and I guess I could live with this knotty feeling for a while longer.

My dad walked to the car, while my mom crouched down to pat Mirio’s head and told him to be more careful next time. Then, she waved me over as she walked to the passenger’s seat. Absolutely glowing, Mirio ran to me and hugged me again.

“TAMAKI, did you see that? Your mom doesn’t hate me!” He yell-whispered in my ear, which was frightening and supposedly impossible, but apparently nothing was with Mirio. I smiled back and felt that same warmth and relief to have my friend back, in one piece and next to me.

“I told you she likes you! Everyone does, Mirio. You’re--you’re the best person I know and-- And people would be stupid not to like you” I rambled feeling stupid and out of control, but the words kept spilling out before I could stop myself.

“Really? Even you?” Mirio asked letting me go and then gently pulled my face so close to his I almost wanted to have his quirk and let the ground swallow me instead. Oh. My. God. My throat dried up and I desperately tried not to think about how red my cheeks were getting or how blue Mirio’s eyes get when he was excited about something.

“Um--er---Mi---mirio, you’re my friend. Of course-- I--- I *cough* like you” I stuttered to get the words out and felt the heat on my face spread to my chest. This was so embarrassing why does this always happen to me?!

“YABAI! I’m so glad! You aren’t just my hero-- literally, but my bestest friend and I’m just happy you like me, too” Mirio declared hugging me so tight I forgot how strong he really was. I felt foolish for the way my stomach was fluttering with his words and sunny embrace, but then it was all I could think about on the whole ride home and the rest of the damn week.

He likes me too.

Part 2 of 5

Hey guys! This is my first attempt at writing a soft fic for our fav soft boys that I love so much💕 Hope you enjoy ^^