tkuro0

[tkuro0]

Will you pretty please add me to the tag list for your mattsun series

Hi yes! I am currently on hiatus and I'm sorry its taken so long for me to answer but once I come back! You are on the tag list <3

[tkuro0]

anatomy of a breakup.

kuroo tetsurou x reader. angst, exes post-breakup, oneshot crossposted on ao3 as higashikatas.

you don’t get it.

it keeps you up at night, it takes your mind away from schoolwork, it makes you replay every single moment of the last year and a half and all the years of friendship before, and you still don’t get it. 

you’ve pulled apart every interaction both by yourself and with yaku, who has been nothing if not kind and patient and supportive and so simply unlike himself… and so like himself at the same time because yaku morisuke is nothing if not the best friend you will ever have. far too many evenings have been spent starfished on his too-big bed with his beloved weighted penguin plush on top of you, while the guy himself paces around alternating between sitting beside you or at his tiny desk-chair. he’d never been good at sitting still, less so when the topic of conversation upset him just as deeply as it did you. 

you wish feelings made sense. even the mere thought brought a fresh wave of pain, because it had never been you who had wanted the logical side of things. it has always been him, while you had laughed and patted his elbow placatingly. you wish a lot of things made sense, actually, but they didn’t and there was also nothing you could do about any of them. so you wallow in your heartbreak and let the voice at the back of your mind call you pathetic until it goes hoarse.

there’s no space for recovery. you’re in close proximity to tetsurou at almost all times- if not physically, then in the framed photograph on your nightstand you can’t bring yourself to throw away, or in the matching phone wallpapers that all the volleyball team bar two (yaku, out of consideration for you, and kenma out of sheer stubbornness) have, or in the group chat that still floods your phone every night. in kenma’s not-so-secret private instagram, in kai’s shared google photo album, in lev’s clumsy little wannabe vlogs, in yaku pretending he isn’t in the same room as you when tetsurou calls. most of all, he’s in your own head- you hold so many memories of him you might just burst. 

you wish the world would stop. stop reminding you of him, stop existing with him in it, stop existing with the both of you in it- anything would be preferable. but the earth refuses to stop spinning because you’re sad, and you wish that the earth didn’t have quite so much of kuroo tetsurou in it. 

(funnily enough, that isn’t the only impossible thing you wish for.)

the earth will not stop spinning, and your friends will not let you stay rooted in the muck of feelings he left you in. you continue to eat lunch with the second-years (on all five days of the week instead of just two now), you continue to walk the first-years home when they stay back late for practice (you do it alone now), you continue to poke fun at taketora and lev over the post-game bowls of ramen and you continue to treat inuoka like your long-lost son. you continue to crack a smile at fukunaga's puns and you continue to beg kai for homework answers over text mere hours before the deadlines. you continue to smile at tetsurou in greeting, continue to stay back when he asks you to discuss their prospects at nationals with coach nekomata, continue to offer to clean up the gyms every other day so he can head home to take care of his grandmother. the heavy knot of heartbreak still hangs like dead weight inside your rib cage, but as long as you continue complaining about kenma’s god awful sleep schedule and continue nodding energetically at snippets of songs that play when yaku slips you his earbuds, you can gloss over the way tetsurou hurt you. 

you get used to the weight with time. it doesn’t fade, but your friends seem to notice a difference even though they say nothing about it. kenma stops hiding his instagram stories from you when he posts another tetsurou grandpa moment. yaku stops sending you cautious glances during practices. taketora finally stops treating you like you’re about to break and starts clamouring for you to join the team bonding sessions once again. 

you aren’t fooled, though. your pain isn’t the kind of scar that heals up cleanly and quickly. you’re fighting to pretend you’re fine, existing this close to kuroo tetsurou and ignoring every instinct that screams at you to quit your post as nekoma’s volleyball manager and beg your parents to let you transfer to itachiyama.

the only thing that makes it hard to stick to the track, unsurprisingly, tetsurou is himself. 

he isn’t even trying. he’s normal again, and you know him well enough to tell that he (unlike you) is not faking a thing. there’s no internal conflict behind the large honest eyes every time he nods at you in greeting, no hesitation or pain echoing across his mind when he casually throws himself onto the couch between you and kenma on movie night and slings an arm across the back of the sofa inches from your head and shoulders. 

that , at least, makes sense, you think to yourself, walking home alone after a night out at the arcade with the team. he was the one who broke up with you so why should he feel any of the pain? why should he feel the ghosts of your touch on the sides of his face and the insides of his wrists every time he absentmindedly brushes against you in a crowded hallway? why should he lie awake at night trying not to think about the feeling of your arms curled around his waist when you used to nap together during free periods? 

he has no reason to agonize over something he chose to end, you know. rationalizing it doesn’t make it better.

the messy cannonball of emotions tucked neatly between your ribcage’s left walls wouldn’t hurt half as bad if it was another thing you shared with tetsurou, you think bitterly, wrapping your scarf tighter around your face. but life is unfair and this is the one thing you don’t share. you’re unbalanced. kuroo is fine and you are not.

you skip the next team outing. you sit in your bathtub, lukewarm water up to your shoulders with your head pressed against your arms, and you don't get it.

[tkuro0]

hey lovelies,

i am currently in a… shit spot LMAO i have to cram for this huge placement test i gotta take,

lovely times…

so while i have to shove a rocket up my ass to somehow get this done my upload schedule is not going to be the consistent every friday post… as much as it pains me, my upload schedule will depend on whether i have any time, there might be a span of time i don’t upload for two weeks and then suddenly drop two chapters in one go… or just disappear until i take the godforsaken exam.... god knows atp-

my exam is december 11th and i am shitting bricks! after that i should be able to upload with consistency and even more often than before!

wish me luck :p and hopefully i’ll see yall soon ❤️

[tkuro0]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KUROO TETSUROU!!!

2024.11.17

Happy birthday to our beloved captain and JVA representative who makes it possible for everyone to enjoy volleyball by lowering the net!!

Source: Official Haikyuu Twitter

[tkuro0]

Display ; Introductions (p2)

EVERYTHING IS ROMANTIC ; coloring book enjoyers

fun fax ;

꩜ kuroo lives w kenma and yaku, in a 4 bedroom apartment that kenma pays half of bc he uses 2 rooms... separation of work spaces or whatever ꩜ kuroo is double majoring in economics and marketing and has minor in english (gave up the chem minor bc he literally cannot take any more classes per semester) ꩜ yaku is on a d1 scholarship and doing marketing, kenma has been streaming since his senior year (doesnt know who tf college is) ꩜ first month back to campus always consists of a rotation of ppl sleeping on their couch, the usual guests are bokuto, lev, kai, sometimes daichi... they usually just stay for the weekend, its a nice tradition they do ꩜ kuroo answers emails while walking, runs into stuff sometimes... he's getting the hang of it ꩜ he rlly does think yn is gorgeous... hence why he added wayyy too much paint into his mixing bowl and started mixing that goddamn blue paint too fast and it flew everywhere ꩜ its all his fault.

taglist ; @mochroialainn @y2unagiz @weezerbby

[tkuro0]

Display ; Introductions

EVERYTHING IS ROMANTIC ; ethically sourced sluts

fun fax ;

꩜ kyotani does NOT use twitter, he only follows y/n... and yachi now ꩜ they went to seijoh together! ꩜ y/n and kyotani are juniors in college! She is double majoring in biochemistry and art. Do not ask her how she does it. ꩜ yams, tsukki and yachi are all sophomores. ꩜ tsukishima is doing geology (he's just praying his D1 scholarship gets him into a national team he doesn't give a shit about college rn), yachi is doing advertising and marketing and yams is sadly doing electrical engineering, kyotani is majoring in ceramics (he finds it relaxing, that D1 scholarship is carrying so much god-) ꩜ yn's roommates were a year older so they moved out during the summer but! just in time for the three idiots to move in bc otherwise... homelessness for yn ꩜ kyotani lives in some uncle's garage or attic... idk no one knows NOR asks. yn's the only one that has been there

taglist ; @mochroialainn @y2unagiz

[tkuro0]

obsessed w the christmas themes across my blogs w the exception of my main BC I FEEL LIKE I JUST DID THAT HOE UGHH it’s fine

[tkuro0]

Now playing… Track 7

UP ALL NIGHT ; g-town euphoria

fun fax ;

☆ noya is actually tweaking a little bit but it’s bc he’s BEEEEEN asking y/n ☆ he rlly just wants to get in there to launch his SoundCloud rapping career (society would collapse actually) ☆ makki is so unhelpful but he does it on PURPOSE ☆ I am very sorry its been so long... like i said i got sick (i still am lord-) and i had a huge exam ☆ but i am out of the woods for now? so more updates soon! sorry its so slow paced and it doesnt help i update like... never! LMAO sorry xoxo

taglist ; @weezerbby @eggyrocks @mochroialainn @kirigiriz

[tkuro0]

new update soon!! i’m sorry i’ve disappeared ! i did great on my biochem exam except i am VERY sick rn so it is slowly being made 🥲

shoutout to the four ppl that liked my post i love yall actually

[tkuro0]

the thing about haikyuu is it’s a love story. but it’s everybody’s love story. it’s asahi saying, “when have my friends ever been a burden,” and kageyama saying, “with me you’re invincible,” and the neighborhood association laughing about him saying that and then putting hours and hours into teaching and supporting these kids who love the same sport they do, and it’s kenma saying, “thank you for getting me into volleyball,” and it’s hinata screaming with joy because his friend is having fun, and it’s tsukishima learning to give his all to something even if there’s more risk in actually caring, and it’s in kageyama and hinata counting and counting and counting their victories and defeats, and it’s in kita telling his team he’s proud of them, and it’s in kageyama saying he wished he could have gone further with this team, and it’s in shimizu stumbling through a simple good luck speech, and it’s in coach ukai reminding his kids to eat well, and it’s in. everything. i could pull a hundred more love stories from these characters but it’s just. it’s in everything.

[tkuro0]

there won’t be a new chapter of up all night until this weekend bc i’m SWAMPED and abt to fight demons w biochem 😟💔

[tkuro0]

Now playing... Track 6

You could hear everyone packing up the things as you opened the door to the large auditorium where your anatomy class was held. The zippers being brought up and down, the shuffling of papers, the snaps of laptops and iPad covers, the chatter that exploded across the students. It was all a bit overwhelming, the frazzled state your run to the classroom after showering and changing left you in didn't help.

You made your way down to the front, bumping shoulders and arms with the mass of people heading out. It was exhausting, you wondered if Matsukawa had left already, or if he had left halfway through the class even. Makki did say he never came to class, that's why his text surprised you. You ignored the warmth that settled in your chest.

He probably left, he was nowhere to be seen as you went down the stairs, looking over the heads that got up and out. Until you saw up front, in his soft black hoodie, clear-framed glasses on his nose as he talked with the professor, blue and white backpack— that seemed awfully empty— slung over one shoulder. He stayed...

"Ah miss y/l, where were you today hm?" Your professor smiled as you got close, stopping right next to Mattsun, who tried his best to hide the surprised look on his face, as if he didn't think you would come at all. The older man smiled at you, the corners of his eyes wrinkling "It's so unlike you not to be here"

"I'm sorry, professor. I had a small accident this morning—” Matsukawa's face grew red, "and I was unable to make it in time." You bowed slightly in apology, heat rising to your cheeks as you caught a glimpse of Mattsun's embarrassed expression.

"Don't worry, I trust Matsukawa here will be able to aid you in catching up” the older man said with a wink, a small content smile pulling at the corners of his lips as he made his way towards the back exit of the classroom, his briefcase in hand. 

“You came to class?” You finally caught Matsukawa’s gaze, his eyes locking into yours. He scrambled to tear his glasses off his face and stuffed them inside the pocket of his hoodie.

“Yeah, I felt really bad-“ you chuckled, looking away now praying the heat you felt on your cheeks wasn’t visible “Makki said you never miss class, I didn’t want to be the reason why you fell behind I guess”

It was his turn to look away now, his fingers fidgeting with the strap of his bag. 

“Thank you, but you didn’t need to go through the trouble-“ you said but he shook his head, giving you the notebook that you didn’t notice he had been holding onto, “you took notes?”

“Yeah here- also I’m aware my handwriting can be a bit… well an illegible monstrosity is what Makki calls it- so I asked Professor Minamoto for the powerpoint-” you raised your eyebrows in surprise. You took the notebook from his hands, holding it close to your chest.

“Did he give it to you? He never lets anyone have it, it’s a constant struggle” 

“I mean it was a pretty awkward conversation since he hasn’t seen my face since the first week but-“ the both of you chuckled, you hadn’t even known you were in the same class until Hanamaki mentioned it this morning “I explained to him you had an accident and well, after he saw my sorry excuse of handwriting he sent it to me so I could pass it over…” his hand came up to scratch the back of his head, a sheepish smile on his face and you couldn’t help but gawk at him. 

You didn't know why you only seemed to notice now, the short messy strands of hair that were itching to curl, the silver hoops that hugged his ears, one on each lobe, and one on the top cartilage on the left, the curve of his bicep as he moved his arm. You cursed at yourself.

“I can’t believe he let you have it oh my god- I can’t thank you enough Matsukawa-”

“Mattsun- you really can just call me Mattsun-” his lips formed a shy smile as your own stretched wider, a breathless laugh leaving them in excitement.

“Thank you Mattsun,” even though you had already called him it once, under the influence and the neon of the club lights, he couldn't help but feel a shiver run down his spine again. Even under the harsh fluorescent classroom lighting, even with the still slightly winded look to you after running through campus, he still thought you looked beautiful. 

He was going to drag Makki into a lake while he slept. 

“Do you- I mean, are you doing anything later?” Matsukawa’s eyes widened as he realized what he had said. He thought it, but he didn’t really mean to say it. He could feel the panic spike in his chest and his palms get clammy. He gripped his backpack strap tightly and followed behind you as you nodded towards the stairs to leave.

“Well I gotta run and meet Noya- he’s getting his nose pierced or something, and then I have a three-hour chem lab, but” you bit the inside of your cheek, fighting the smile that threatened to break out “Would you maybe want to sit with me at the studio tomorrow? If you’re free around noon?” You could feel your heart beat rapidly in your chest, your eyes locked into his chocolate brown ones as you stopped at the top of the stairs.

“The studio?”

“Yeah- I host a show Thursdays at noon, for the campus radio station-”

“We have a radio station?” you laughed as you nodded at his question, announcing the name and the unforgettable slogan as the two of you continued to laugh. You stared at the red that dusted his cheeks again. “I’d love to though- go with you I mean, I just don’t have a clue where it is-”

“That’s fine, I’ll text you yeah?” You started walking through the door, his gaze didn't wave from your face, not as you went up the stairs or through the door. It remained on you even when you stopped in the hallway outside. You looked up at him again, “see you at 12-”

“Yeah- see you” His words were quiet and breathless. He was going to kill Makki.

UP ALL NIGHT ; only girl (in the world)

fun fax ;

☆ atp i dont think the titles have anything to do w the chapters... sometimes they will! not this time however... ☆ noya's piercings constantly reject, he has a cartilage piercing he takes out when it gets infected, lets it rest and heal and then STABS through it with the earring when he thinks its fine... menace ☆ matsukawa nervous loser agenda sorry i love him so much ☆ oikawa is so excited for the scheming gc he is SO messy... iwa secretly likes it too he's so nosey but he won't get involved.. or tries not to at least

taglist ; @weezerbby @eggyrocks @mochroialainn @kirigiriz

[tkuro0]

(i forgot last night im so sorry) taglist ; @weezerbby @eggyrocks @mochroialainn @kirigiriz

Now playing… Track 5

UP ALL NIGHT ; No Air

fun fax ;

☆ noya is umeko's #1 hater.... as he should be. ☆ matsukawa will never live this down ☆ after y/n left mattsun RAN out ☆ oikawa seriously believes all the girls on campus have some like secret massive group chat (he just has a reputation and he isn't even a student smh...) ☆ y/n hosts a radio show every Thursday!

[tkuro0]

Now playing… Track 5

UP ALL NIGHT ; No Air

fun fax ;

☆ noya is umeko's #1 hater.... as he should be. ☆ matsukawa will never live this down ☆ after y/n left mattsun RAN out ☆ oikawa seriously believes all the girls on campus have some like secret massive group chat (he just has a reputation and he isn't even a student smh...) ☆ y/n hosts a radio show every Thursday!

[tkuro0]

Misc.

[tkuro0]

me wanting to update up all night every other day is doing horrors to my exam prep and uni work

[tkuro0]

Now playing… Track 4

UP ALL NIGHT ; Good Feeling

fun fax ;

☆ yn is 100% up for joining matsuhana's polycule ☆ he had to put his phone down... first and only time mattsun has actually paid attention in his ethics class ☆ iwa is a notes hoarder but its mostly to mess w tanaka, he sends them eventually... he's also a little self conscious abt his handwriting ☆ oikawa is such a messy bitch... ☆ mattsun is doing so bad in anatomy (bc he never goes) 9am classes r so hard </3 he's just a boy ☆ all the titles are early 2000s'-10's party songs, yn loves playing throwbacks... listen to the playlist xoxo

taglist ; @weezerbby @eggyrocks @mochroialainn @kirigiriz