tomyeros

[tomyeros]

This series of letters become a memoir that our love will never forget. Even it is for lifetime.

xoxo.

This is an archive for the remembrace of how beautiful, captivating of our love.

[tomyeros]

VII.

Hi babe! its me, your big baby, Marcellino.

It's been passing days without you since you are on the break from the relationship, I've been wondering if you are okay out there. It's quite lonely here but I still feel your presence even if you are not here physically. However, it doesn't stop me from loving you even if you loses spark over me. Which I understand, you did try your best babe. Despite you are broadly honest with me, you still trying to look for the love that once spark within you towards me.

- [ ] On this 18th of this month. First and formost, I have thought thoroughly and deep in regards to what will the future bring into our relationship. Gods knows what will happen to us but we don't know what are we leading into. Is it happier or sadder? I hope we won't pick latter one, we keeping the first one. Of course, I'm well aware that you cannot promise anything, it may hurts but still I give you tons of points that you still being truthful about what's happening and it eats you away every seconds. So deciding to take a break from our relationship was even the hardest decision on your part. You may call me selfish and greedy, but I still want you in my life, babe. You know it, right? I know fully well that you'll do feel the same way.

- [ ] Secondly, we both have been exhaustingly busy and we weren't able to make time for each other even if we both tirelessly trying because the feeling of missing the favourite person so badly, so desperately. But the time gap is exciating us deeply. It's totally understandable that time gap and the nature of your work at this present has made you loses park the love we once had.

I just want to tell you from the bottom of my heart, to give you assurance, contentment and with my unyielding affection that I, myself, still love you with all my life. Like for the millionth times over and that alone never made me tired. What did I ever tell you in the beginning? Once you chose me, that means I'm the type of a person who never stop loving you. Remember right?

- [ ] Thirdly, I have no authority to restrict you in doing what you love to do, to spend time with your friends, to chill whatever you want, and anything. Why? Because I valued your happiness above everything. That's what I only wanted and I'm not the type to be in wanting to control my partner, that's not who I am. I cherished you so much that you can never imagine, and I do deeply treasure you with all my life. I wouldn't imagine if you are not there anymore. And I didn't want to think that and it will ended up hurting both of us deeply. We don't want that right?

- [ ] Lastly, I'm well aware that making promises cannot keep is much of a burden for you and I totally understand that completely. Probably you might forget that, if we can't promised each other. Let's just cherish every moments together with love and happiness and contentment in our hearts that we may— you know what I will say but better not to say it, at least.

So baby Alana, my precious shining diamond.. You know that I love you right? You still do and I know you will love me the same. I still have butterflies in my tummies from the first day we both met for the first time. It does feel like a yesterday. Your existence is the ample of my stress-messy life. Your love, your endless affection, and your nagging made me part of who I am and it makes me forever indebted to you and so grateful towards you. It's such a beautiful blessing and deserving gift that God had given me. It's more than enough and I don't need anything but you. Just only you.

I love you with every fabric of my existence.

To the past, present, and future.

Yesterday, today, tomorrow, and to the beyond.

It's always been a beautiful life with you, ma chère.

I will be forever supporting you in everything you do and never forget to take a break once in awhile. Don't make me super nagging on you.

Cheers to you, to me, and us together.

Our love will always be timeless boundaries, and to the infinity beyond.

Everlasting togetherness

With dearest love,

Marcellino.

[tomyeros]

VI.

Life is a beautiful, glittering sky heaven above, Loving and believing each's soul is a marvelous sight to see. You and I, been together for the half month of this year. How irresistible our eternity love would be.

Hi baby Alana, it certainly feels like an eons to write this letter and knowingly that it is already 6th Monthsary of our relationship. I have millionth words I want to say but it is always form as "I love you" . This August month surely takes on the emotional rollercoaster between you and I, but we stayed together until now. That's something I wholly adore about you most of the time. I thought of you all the time and until it goes on forever. I know "Forever" sounds like a bit much of a stretch and yet, I love to use it because your existence is the ample of my life. I cannot thank you enough to be there for me even if it is only short brief moment. Your presence itself is a blessing from God. I know that has being said for multiple times and I love how you never get tired of me saying this to you. And I love you for that.

Baby, being you and I in this suck-up, chaotic world, the existence of being so messed up everything. Our love will always be there and it would remain there. But I will always be here supporting you with every energy I have despite how exhausted you are and coming home so late just to hit the hay. I just want to say that you have done well, you did your best surviving in this world that is not so lovable and friendly to you. You are awesome and will always be amazing person you can be, your hardworking made me feel proud of you even if I hope people would have at least help you because doing it on your own. But I am with you babe, giving you all the boost that you needed the most.

I know I am not perfectionist or anything, I'm trying to be best version that you always be proud of and I will keep growing to be better person when I am with you. I know I have mistakes and I do reflect on them deeply, but I don't want to stay in that spot and to move on to make tomorrow itself a better place with huge smile on the face. Still you love me for who I am and as a person, you don't bother if I can be a little stoic and realistic. Yet you still love me. And for that, I thank you. I know you'll say that you don't need to thank me a lot. But I needed to, because I love you with all my heart, and every fabric of my soul. I truly do because without you in my life. Where is the road that I am leading into? I don't know and I don't even want to know what is it.

Just I writing this heartfelt letter to you with endless love and affection, from the bottom of my deepest heart. I will always love you for eternity and I intend to keep it going. Yes, for the rest of my life and to the next afterlife. I won't stop and I don't have plans to do so.

So once again, Happy 6th Monthsary with you babe! I will be with you in wherever your place you want to be.

I love you, Alana.

With love and graces, Marcellino.

[tomyeros]

V.

"With you,

You shine the brightness in the starless night sky.

For my eyes, only look towards you.

Proud to be yours. Yes, only yours.

Which forever etched in my heart."

Hi babe, it's me Marcellino again. We have meet again on this 18th for the fifth time. Time surely flies passing by, but it feels like a dream. There is so much words I want to say to you. However, first and for most, I love you Alana. I wholly do for the nth time. Yet, it neve gets tired of saying those simple three words. Guess the habits will stay permanently. Heh.

These days especially these last two months, was one of the most busiest day of your life. I understood that, I can't do anything but to support you wholly without never means to stop. When you confide to me that you were restless, hitting depression harder, and constant overthinking. I've immediately went to your side without a question and to listen your personal struggles even I do not know what's the reason behind it. Since you chose to not say it in a fear of being harshly criticize. But, I don't force you to say it and I simply listen to your rants, to make you feel better, to give you most comfort with all my strength to bear, and mostly, I valued your feelings and your happiness. I'm most gladly that you chose to share with me because you need someone to talk to. Rest assured, my love. I will always be your best listener and not the type to judge you.

My love, you don't have to fight alone anymore. You have me to be on your side, to share our emotion together. To cry, to be sad, to be happy and whatever our emotion comes out. Let's do that together, hm? I don't mind if it is going to be for the rest of my life, in after life and next. If not in this present.

Alana, my most precious sweetest girlfriend I adore so dearly.

I love you, with every inch fabric of my entire existence. I love you for accepting who I am and it makes me feel butterflies that you still adore my stoic persona but there is beautiful behind it. You already saw it and chose to fall in love with me. How do I deserve you? Your existence is the greatest blessing that God had given me. Even if I said it for many times, I still truly do. And that is the fact, you are mostly loved by me only.

To celebrate this whole five months with you, I proudly say that I'm yours forever. I'm wholly the luckiest man alive to be fallen in love by you. Not to mention that you were the first to fall in love with me and to confess up with me. Ah those are beautiful things to witness and it will be forever engrave in my heart. Such moments with you will always be worth remembering. It makes me sobbing real while I writing this letter to you. More like on the happy tears and it makes me even love you more every seconds past.

But still, I missed you so bad. :')

p.s. You keep annoying me as your love language, It made me driving crazily over you. So obsessed in love with you. I don't have regrets when I chose you. I love you so fucking much muchier and muchiest!

Once again, Happy 5th Monthsary with you.

Please be happy my love, I love to see your smile everyday. Even if I am not around. You will always be irreplaceable for me. No one will ever take your place on my heart. Only you, that I love the most in my life.

[tomyeros]

IV.

I love you, Everything. All of it. Yes, Everything with you.

Hi babe. it's me, Marcellino again. I've come to realize that it's already fourth month together with you. Time quickly flying so fast more than anything. I wish nothing but to stop a time so that I can spent eternity you. Nothing else more I want. Just only you, my love and mostly, my everything. I wouldn't imagine to live in a world without you, your very own presence. I wouldn't take it another way than you. I know it sounds quite greedy, but it comes from beneath of my heart and my unconditional love for you.

These days have been the busiest month for you, witnessing you having mental breakdown, stress, had barely enough of sleepiness, and facing yearly depression. All I can do is to support you without means to stop, and to give you words of comfort to live another day, and to tell you rest once in a while. In which you did that already, I'm truly glad. I am, yes. I'm always concern for your well-being but you assured me that you know your body best. Aside from that, me being cranky, hungry, or even more insane. It's because I've been missing you lately and so badly even without telling you and pressure you to be there for me. As much I wanted to, and I know you feel the same way too. That is why I've been patient for throughout the beginning of this month, especially it's already half way to a year. And yet, we are still together, going stronger and we have this unbreakable bond that nobody wouldn't even dare to break it. I love you, Alana. I always do, truly.

My baby, I know you are a little tired of hearing me saying this for a millionth times, but I love you with all my heart, my mind, and with every fabric of my soul. To infinite and beyond. No one will ever stop me from loving you. From dusk to dawn, from going to sleep and waking up, from minutes to day or perhaps a month already. Nothing can stop me. I know you are feeling bad about me having to wait for you. Please don't feel bad, all I can assure you that I'll keep waiting you even if you don't need me to or tell me to until... Maybe Gods knows when it is going to happen. (admittingly, that I shed a tears typing this) but I want to be with you, till the end and forevermore. If not in this present, probably in the afterlife or ever beyond out of reach. You're the best person in my life inspite that you're cutely insane. You are truly an irreplaceable for me and would not have other way around.

So much ponder to think everything all at once, silly me. I'm quite fragile to write this but hey, I love you crazily. More than you can imagine. :")

I love you from the bottom of my heart, To you, to me, Together.

Happy 4th Monthsary with you, My everything.

With Love, Marcellino.

[tomyeros]

One Hundredth Days,

and thus begins with YOU.

Our 3rd month anniversary has passed and the 100 days is here even if it's it's quite late. So millionth apologies here since I lost track of time. >_<.

So baby, happiest 100th days with you. There are no words that can truly express how thankful and grateful I am to have you in my life. You have been my most trusted confidante during the hardest times and saddest moments, and yet, you're still here. This is why I feel so blessed and fortunate to have someone who loves me even at my lowest points and despite my many flaws. Still, you chose to be with me when others attempted to break the bonds between us due to unfortunate circumstances, proving your unwavering commitment and love.

Alana, my love.

I love you,

with my utmost unshakeable heart.

I wholeheartedly do; there is no other place where I seek comfort and feel at home more than with you. You are my strength and my everyday comfort in this home. You're my home, and I will stay here for the rest of my life, even if it is for eternity. I really do, I sincerely do. You are the anchor that keeps me grounded, the light that guides me through the darkest times, and the love that fills my heart with endless joy. In your arms, I have found a haven of peace and a sanctuary of unwavering love, and there is nowhere else I would rather be.

So, please continue to love me every passing second, even when you are not physically here and during the busiest times. I won't ask or force you to be here for me because I know in my heart that you still love me, even without the need for words. Your love is felt in every beat of my heart, and your presence lingers in my thoughts, providing comfort and reassurance. I trust in the strength of our bond, knowing that distance and time cannot diminish the depth of our love. Your unwavering support and affection are always with me, and that alone brings me peace and joy.

I love you with every fibers of my beings. ❤️

With love,

Marcellino.

[tomyeros]

III.

Happy 3rd Month Anniversary to you, My most beloved. I love you again.

What words should I say to write this? To me, this day is filled with a million thoughts, and a thousand meanings, yet my heart beats with infinity. Nevertheless, happiest happy 3rd monthsary, Alana. Time has come quickly with each passing second since we first time met. To go so far to reach 100 days is a multitude of bliss blessings that God comes and graces us with love. It is filled with overwhelming happiness and love.

It's just been an ordinary day for me until the moment that I laid my eyes on this girl with such an aura of being so kind and friendly. However, there is a special something about you which I'll never forget and it is engraved into my heart. It was truly extraordinary, more extra-extraordinary about you. Yet, it made me realize without expecting it to happen, I... I ended up falling in love with you. Even now, my stomach fills with butterflies.

Every day that we have shared is with pure joy and laughter even during those challenging times when we both argued and misunderstood one another. But with those? It becomes our strength and it makes our love stronger than anything. We've overcome all the trials that we have faced. Thus is the reason why I am writing to you every month, to be reminded that we have come so far, even now.

That is true when you said that you are truly the luckiest woman in the world, to have me, to catch my heart, and to understand you completely through better and worse moments. Being with you every day like this is a true blessing and I feel contented with anything. That's enough for me. When I just started my day, what is the first thing I do? To message you with I love you(s). That means you are really a special person to me, my love, and mostly, my everything. These days have been tough for the past month until now with all timezone differences and unexpected busy days and such, to the point that we barely talked. But- It doesn't stop me from loving you more, stronger than before and it really shows how resilient our love is. Everything we do without getting affected by those, means a lot for me.

My dearest Alana, I love you again. It took me a while to fall for you even though I am the one who didn't notice those love signs that you gave me. You've always been the cornerstone of my life with all the challenging trials that I have to face every day. You've been with me through the happiest and saddest moments, it means a lot. Truly. Your existence is something that I want to cherish deeply and wholeheartedly. I'm more than happy to know you becoming happier and that makes me wanna see that in you. Everyday. But nothing frets that it makes me love you even more.

From the bottom of my heart, thank you dearest for loving me without any condition. Thank you for always being there for me even if you are really busy. Thank you for loving me. Thank you for being my everything. And once again, Happy 3rd monthsary to both of us. I will look forward to all the months and years to come.

I love you through the ends of time and forever, I intend to continue with it and it will not stop me.

Yours truly, Marcellino.

[tomyeros]

Happy 3rd Month Anniversary,

I love you.

First and foremost, happy 3rd monthsary, Marcellino. I can't believe how quickly time has flown since we first met. They say time flies when you're having fun, and that's certainly been true for us. It's amazing to think we've been together for nearly 100 days now, each one filled with love and joy.

When we first met, I was both scared and nervous, which is unusual for me. But there was something special about you that made me feel different, and I was right. From that first moment, I knew there was something extraordinary about you, and that’s when I began to fall in love with you.

We've shared so many joyful moments, from our laughter and happiness to the more challenging times that have only strengthened our bond. I wouldn’t trade any of it for the world. Monthsaries may seem unimportant to others, but to me, they mean so much more. I think of monthsaries as another happy milestone spent with the love of my life, reminding me of how far we've come.

Every day with you is the best day of my life, and I feel like the luckiest woman in the world. It may sound cliché, but it's true. I wake up each day knowing I’ve found my special someone, and that you feel the same way about me. Knowing that you're out there loving me as much as I love you fills my heart with joy and contentment. Even for this past month has been tough with the time zone difference and unplanned busy days making it hard for us to talk as much. The distance has been challenging, but it has also shown me how strong and resilient our love is. But thank you for sticking with me and adapting to these challenges without letting it affect our love for each other. They means everything to me.

I’m not sure if it was love at first sight, but it didn’t take long for me to fall for you. You’ve been there for me through tears and joy, and I’ll always be there for you. You’re my best friend, my love, and my constant support. The way you understand me, even when words aren't enough, is something I cherish deeply. And the love you have for me.. is what pushes me to be a better woman, a better girlfriend, to be more confident, and to embrace my true self. You always manage to make me smile, even when I’m "hangry", haha. You see me at my best and my worst, and you love me just the same.

So, thank you for loving me unconditionally. Thank you for being my everything. And once again, happy 3rd monthsary to us, I look forward to all the months and years ahead.

I love you now and always will.

Yours truly,

Alana.

[tomyeros]

II.

Hi babe, it's me, Marcellino. I'm here writing this to you again. This surely gonna take a while for me to write whatever I want to say to you. Even if it's already been repeated many times.

Happy 2nd Monthsary with you, my everything! It feels like yesterday that we started dating and I still have butterflies in my stomach in every moment until now. I never once regretted it and everything was worth waiting for. Truly, it is a blessing from the God that has given to you to me. How did I deserve it? I would never wanted to waste every chance like this in a life time. So allow me to be faithful and to give you all the love that you deserved it.

Still scarcely believe that we are meeting again for the 2nd time on our 18th for the second time. It deeply ponders with a gazillion of thoughts to anticipate this day. Although today would be another ordinary day as usual on a normal daily basis we exchange teas/gossip, TED Talks, silliness, and throw each other with love and affection, not only do we enjoy a deep conversation with all the emotional strolls we face every day together.

Alana, my love. My everything. My irreplaceable diamond. First of all, you know what I want to say right? Of course, you do sweetheart. I love you, Alana. Seriously. May haps, that you feel a little tired of me hearing these three words the countless time. However, I'm really earnest that I keep saying this because you are so precious, you are so loved, you are so humbled, so kind, and all the list that I have seen you all corners of your side. Your flaws and everything.

I also want to say heartfelt thanks to you for your patience and understanding in being with me this month despite how busily packed your schedule was. Your absence made me long for you, every day. I often re-read our conversation like it is a habit that I will never get rid of. I apologize if I ever pushed you too hard to be there for me. I cannot help but miss you every second, minute, hour, day, and until now. I yearned for you but I wouldn't want to force you to be here for me. Don't pressure yourself or feel bad about me, your presence enough makes this man happy more than anything.

I may not be the perfect man, you'll ever have. But I assure you that your every day is filled with my unconditional love and I have no intention to stop it. It will continue as it is. Thank you babe for staying with me until now. You still love me even if I am brusque and stringent however my love for you never fades and it will never remain dust until everlasting. You have already felt all the love that I have given you and I want to stay with you, if you allow me for as long as it is possible. No matter what comes next. I love you with all my heart and my deep soul, Alana.

With love, Marcellino.

[tomyeros]

This will be a collection of monthsary letters. So, I will write every 18th of the month. It will be my gift to you.

Which is why I created this blog solely about you.

[tomyeros]

What is Love?

Never been too tired to think about you Body-mind is you and me Worth of every tear. To keep carrying on, our love.

Love, every minute exists with you Every step you take is worth it. but, I'm just behind you.

I hope that my everyday smile will always be your healing. At the same time, I always find new hope. Hope to see my love. Which is an offering to you.

Hope, to see your eyes Because your sight desired Hoping, to be noticed Because I'm here watching

No certainty to say because I will always find the strength to say that everything will be okay, no matter what. "That our love is worth it." Regardless.

Don't forget I love you like a shadow Whether in the dark or the light is there for you The shadow of love is an offering. To me, To you. Together forevermore.

[tomyeros]

Unexpected. A word that once where everything all comes at once, speechless, off-guarded, and wasn't expecting anything.

Until you came into my life, A collision of stars. The guiding light to my darkness.

Who would ever thought that it would be you who loved me first? It fills the words I came through my mouth with millions of meanings.

Thought that I would be forever, Alone. To a place where I can't escape all endless loneliness.

Thanks to you, I found my way to smile again.

And thus, begins with you.

[tomyeros]

Yours,

The world has fallen into glittering skies, you are the beacon of limitless light to guide me. My love, my hope, my starry skies in the neverendingly night. To you.