tora-the-cat - Tumblr blog

[tora-the-cat]

*raises distasteful eyebrow* sasuke's moral compass is a roulette wheel? What an odd and foolish thing to say. Good thing I would never say that

How did so many adults look at twelve year old Sasuke and think to themselves, "Yeah, that's mentally stable, let's give him knives."

He is SO unhinged as a lil tweeny superiority and inferiority complex ass baby gay that I cannot even

I mean no ninja is really mentally stable but goddamn that whole generation pulled out all the stops didn't they

[tora-the-cat]

Oh no thinking about Kakashi and itachi again they should have met in like. Itachi shows up to a PTA meeting and forms an alliance with Kakashi (who is there for Naruto and won't be removed no matter how much people complain because his psyche is already so fragile and 1.hiruzen knows this man is at his limit and doesn't wanna push his luck after forbidding him from talking to the kid 2.it is the only semi-normal socialization he indulges in and 3.literally who is gonna stop him.) Against the InoShikaCho moms who rule the schoolboard with an iron fist even though everyone KNOWS Yamanaka's fruit cake is DRIER THEN SUNA.

[tora-the-cat]

Someone tries to file a complaint about his presence because. Hey we hate that guy. and they storm out of the council meeting all the way to the hokage tower where they find the Hokage and the terrifying woman that runs the hospital and punched god in the face once watching the meeting in a crystal ball and exchanging bets.

Ideal post 4th war Sakura and Obito frenemieship is. Extremely important to me. Something about their brains being wired similarly. Something about Haruno "oh no my actions have CONCEQUENCES? time to emotionally manipulate all of my precious people, try to kill sasuke, and then have a complete mental breakdoen about it!!' Sakura and Uchiha 'oh shit my actions havd CONCEQUENCES??? fuck fuck fuck uh. Oh! Oh, oh noooo, how TRAGIC, im being MARTYRED instead of having to face Reality being Real for the first time in 20 years, saddddd' Uchiha. Something about Plurality. And hijinks.

[tora-the-cat]

WAIT. something about the cycle of violence and Sasuke being atomically comprised of love love love and Itachi's and Sasuke's parallels on their way out of the village. Something about how they both had to leave Konoha for their own reasons and were their worst selves in those moments, but Itachi was (as always) irreconcilably selfish. He kills his parents, and then he waits for Sasuke to come home. Sasuke tries to sneak out without a word, and when he's caught he thanks Sakura knocks her out painlessly and lays her on a bench. Itachi showed Sasuke no mercy, literally tortured the 6 year old psychologically emotionally and physically for what amounted to days for Sasuke, all in the pursuit of fufilling his own long term-suicide plan, and Sasuke was literally half-possessed and still only hurts Naruto out of hunted necessity.

Something about 'you have hidden potential, that's why I allow you to live. for my sake' vs. 'I spared you on a whim.' and lying while also telling the truth to come off as more cold and calculated and irredeemable, but Itachi did it to manipulate Sasuke into being physically incapable of ever thinking about anything else and Sasuke did it to silently beg Naruto to move on.

[tora-the-cat]

He is her husbands only living family and Sarada's stay at home annoying ass doting uncle. He's not a shinobi (NOT passing any field-ready-psych-evals, ESPECIALLY while Ino is the one giving them (Ino hates him)), but he IS, in a morbidly ironic strike of fate, the resident Uchiha Elder, and usually the acting head while Sasuke is out and about. He finds this absolutely hilarious. He's HEAVILY involved in clan and village politics and, to the annoyance of everyone involved, he's. REALLY good at politics.

Ideal post 4th war Sakura and Obito frenemieship is. Extremely important to me. Something about their brains being wired similarly. Something about Haruno "oh no my actions have CONCEQUENCES? time to emotionally manipulate all of my precious people, try to kill sasuke, and then have a complete mental breakdoen about it!!' Sakura and Uchiha 'oh shit my actions havd CONCEQUENCES??? fuck fuck fuck uh. Oh! Oh, oh noooo, how TRAGIC, im being MARTYRED instead of having to face Reality being Real for the first time in 20 years, saddddd' Uchiha. Something about Plurality. And hijinks.

[tora-the-cat]

Orochimaru keeps inviting him over for tea because they want to Ask Some Questions about his hashirama cells and Sakura has to talk him down from a fullblown Madara Meltdown Murder That Snake plan by reminding him that, unfortunately, if Orochimaru died or disappeared Sasuke and Naruto would be somewhat upset.

Ideal post 4th war Sakura and Obito frenemieship is. Extremely important to me. Something about their brains being wired similarly. Something about Haruno "oh no my actions have CONCEQUENCES? time to emotionally manipulate all of my precious people, try to kill sasuke, and then have a complete mental breakdoen about it!!' Sakura and Uchiha 'oh shit my actions havd CONCEQUENCES??? fuck fuck fuck uh. Oh! Oh, oh noooo, how TRAGIC, im being MARTYRED instead of having to face Reality being Real for the first time in 20 years, saddddd' Uchiha. Something about Plurality. And hijinks.

[tora-the-cat]

I CANT BELIEVE SAI JUST CALLED SASUKE A HOMO

[tora-the-cat]

Obito doesn't get crushed in Kanabi, and Madara's plan is delayed by, like, about a decade until Shisui falls into his grasp. Then he tells the kid that Itachi's in trouble and lets him loose, only for the boy to stumble accross Itachi killing Everyone and then getting killed by a ROOT member. Shisui takes the ROOT member out and takes Itachi's eyes before the ROOT members can get them, and then crawls back to Madara to join his plan. He does the Kyuubi attack when Naruto's little sister, Maki, is born, going down like cannon!Obito except Minato gets 10 more years as hokage and Sasuke, Sakura, and Naruto are all early-graduate gennin already. Naruto swears vengance on him and team 7 raises Maki together. Naruto is still Jinchurriki; he was with his mom when the attack happened, and volunteer in place of his sister

[tora-the-cat]

He probably has a noticeable problem with alcohol but she has WARPED ideas about 'typical and safe' alcohol consumption especially for shinobi and he's half plant monster anyway so it's fine, right? Sakura's relationship with alchohol is complex and probably bad but at least she'll go to whisky tastings with him and have a great time. He spends years passively suicidal at the best of times and she spends them fretting over keeping him alive, for the sake of her teammates more then his own, which is kind of perfect because he only LETS HER for the sake of her teammates. (And also for her sake. because she is. somewhat fond of him.)

Ideal post 4th war Sakura and Obito frenemieship is. Extremely important to me. Something about their brains being wired similarly. Something about Haruno "oh no my actions have CONCEQUENCES? time to emotionally manipulate all of my precious people, try to kill sasuke, and then have a complete mental breakdoen about it!!' Sakura and Uchiha 'oh shit my actions havd CONCEQUENCES??? fuck fuck fuck uh. Oh! Oh, oh noooo, how TRAGIC, im being MARTYRED instead of having to face Reality being Real for the first time in 20 years, saddddd' Uchiha. Something about Plurality. And hijinks.

[tora-the-cat]

Kakashi: Class clowns are usually the weakest link. The easiest to take out. The losers.

Obito, somewhere far in the distance, bullying S class nuke-nin: *sneezes* wow who’s talking shit about me this time =/

[tora-the-cat]

He eats everything she cooks and defends it stalheartedly, acting like people are UNIMAGINABLY cruel for pretending to hate it and she nods and listens and is the only other person in the world that knows he doesn't actually need to "eat" "food" on only barely has "tastebuds". She's his physical therapist and at first he's lowkey worried she'll keep reminding him of Rin, but thankfully her bedside manner is NIGHTMARISH.

Ideal post 4th war Sakura and Obito frenemieship is. Extremely important to me. Something about their brains being wired similarly. Something about Haruno "oh no my actions have CONCEQUENCES? time to emotionally manipulate all of my precious people, try to kill sasuke, and then have a complete mental breakdoen about it!!' Sakura and Uchiha 'oh shit my actions havd CONCEQUENCES??? fuck fuck fuck uh. Oh! Oh, oh noooo, how TRAGIC, im being MARTYRED instead of having to face Reality being Real for the first time in 20 years, saddddd' Uchiha. Something about Plurality. And hijinks.

[tora-the-cat]

lol yeah. the REAL reason Obito summons the Kyuubi ON RIN'S GRAVE isn't any of the angsty emotional symbolic shit you would think. it's cause he's mentally trying to even the playing field after hearing Kakashi talk so much shit about him basically on his grave.

Kakashi: Class clowns are usually the weakest link. The easiest to take out. The losers.

Obito, somewhere far in the distance, bullying S class nuke-nin: *sneezes* wow who’s talking shit about me this time =/

[tora-the-cat]

Ideal post 4th war Sakura and Obito frenemieship is. Extremely important to me. Something about their brains being wired similarly. Something about Haruno "oh no my actions have CONCEQUENCES? time to emotionally manipulate all of my precious people, try to kill sasuke, and then have a complete mental breakdoen about it!!' Sakura and Uchiha 'oh shit my actions havd CONCEQUENCES??? fuck fuck fuck uh. Oh! Oh, oh noooo, how TRAGIC, im being MARTYRED instead of having to face Reality being Real for the first time in 20 years, saddddd' Uchiha. Something about Plurality. And hijinks.

[tora-the-cat]

lol I know there's only 8 votes, but I still think it's kinda funny that Haunt The Lonely got so few votes considering. it's one of my most popular Naruto fic series on Ao3

[tora-the-cat]

love rewatching Kabuto and Orochimaru scenes. Best abusive mother representation ever put to cell.

[tora-the-cat]

@evilkitten3 #the amount of people in the stands panicking at the thought that the yellow flash might've come back somehow.... or reproduced....#if orochimaru wanted violence so badly he didn't need to kill the kazekage he just needed to tell oonoki that minato had a kid

^Absolutely NUCLEAR option. Orochimaru couldn't do that because Sasuke absoLUTELY would've been colateral. Along with like. The entire forest of death. Like there's just a hole there now.

Kumo-nin at the chunnin exam: ……that kid. The blonde one that beat the hyuuga.

Other kumo-nin: yeah? What about him?

Kumo-nin 1: don’t you think he looks….EXACTLY like the yellow flash?

Kumo-nin 2: ….no

Kumo-nin 1: are you su-

Kumo-nin 2: positive.

Kumo-nin 1: b-

Kumo-nin 2: I mean, unless YOU want to bring this up with Raikage-sama

Kumo-nin 1:

Kumo nin 1: Wow you’re right I have never seen a kid that looks LESS like the yellow flash