toskanatorium

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writing is such a slog how do i beam my thoughts straight into the paper

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teensy preview

Alex bends down in front of her. She is so small, so angry. He can never forget this fact of her, not even when she grows up. Right now, he is desperately wishing she was a little more grown up. This desire feels like a betrayal to someone. Maybe to her. Likely more to himself. He grasps her knees. He drags them up and squeezes her clenched fists in her lap. She relaxes fractionally. Her eyes are burning through him. “Look at me, baby.” Slowly, like honey, he drags his hands up her arms, letting her feel the heat of his skin as he presses her body in onto itself. His fingers find her neck again, and then her cheeks, still soft with baby fat. He presses a kiss to her crown, where her copper hair is flying away even when she prefers it swept to the side. “Good.” Her spine loses its metal rigidity and she sags against him, docile again. Sweet. Tender to the touch.

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now how do i explain i'll write guilt-riddled lolicon without saying im actually a lolicon... like i dont like kids.. but i'll write about alex being so guilty about eventually wanting his own daughter....

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all you guys

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no pwp inc35t because i believe in the psychological torture and moral corruption and ensuing downfall of good men

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"please, daddy, fix me" daughter x "im sorry, im sorry, im sorry" father

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the subtle but important distinction between "daddy" and "dad" is one of my favorite ageplay/fauxcest things tbh. cause on the one hand, going from "daddy" to "dad" is a shift from "teehee we're saying something taboo and kinky" to "i want you to Be My Father and also fuck me." but going from "dad" to "daddy" as they regress younger and younger is sorely underrated tbh. they both have their place but the difference can really make a scene 🥴

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can you just imagine darcy at 12 and fully losing her mind over something stupid, kicking and screaming and shouting. alex knows that his touch soothes her, but his usual attempt at pulling her into an embrace results in a bite, and so alex pins her down and he inadvertently spreads her legs and presses his thigh right there. her eyes widen and she is so, so quiet--but she isn't afraid. she's listening and she's waiting for him, but alex rears back like he's been burnt because this is almost worse than what would have happened if he just backhanded her like every disciplinarian would have (he could never be one). darcy is trembling a little and goes quiet and obedient and sticks to his side, as if pleading for more like a kicked puppy offered a scrap of comfort.

she throws another fit the next day anyway. alex has to tell himself that his thigh just slid between her legs easily because he was tussling her to the wall. he doesn't think about how he keeps it there longer, until she's quiet and the only movement is the minute rock of her hips he ignores.

he scoops her up and she clings to him. docile. sweet.

(he doesn't think about the next tantrum.)

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darcy arliss ; oc intro

SOMETHING SICK IN THE HEAD. LOVED DAUGHTER.

Her daddy calls her Darcy-girl. He always has and he always will, she knows it. Darcy’s never been wanting for love, never been wanting for affection. While she and her daddy aren’t rich, she’s never been left wanting in any sort of way. Maybe that’s why the rot set in her head. It started when she was little, before common sense was anything common to her.

Her methodical dissection of the world around her is tolerable. Almost even gentle and welcome compared to the way she acts out (she does it less now). Sometimes it is in a flying rage – dishes thrown, cutlery embedded in the dining table older than her. Sometimes it is in a calculated, seething anger – missing pets, shaken children. People started noticing anyway.

At least her daddy is there for her to soothe her anger. It is bone-deep and only he could ever reach it. Who else is going to love her? He made her. He made this. This is his onus. Besides, he never seems like he doesn’t want to fix her. That was why she loves him and his everlasting patience, his bruisingly calming touch.

Sometimes it hurts. Sometimes it doesn’t. What matters, really, is that it is him. It started working, anyway. They figured out what worked and what failed. What softens the needles inside her. There is no one else she loves more because even if he doesn’t understand, he lets her be.

Darcy has a feeling that what she is will never change. It doesn’t matter, because as long as her daddy loves her, it doesn’t bother her to know that no one else will.

stats; early to late teens, copper-red hair, sharp amber eyes, delicate hands, scraped knees, mocking smile.

more : ALEXANDER ARLISS ; DOTING FATHER

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alexander arliss ; oc intro

ONLY SON of an ONLY SON. A DOTING FATHER.

Alex was once shot-gunned married to a girl who didn't want him – now, she’s long dead and all he has is his daughter in his late wife’s place. It’s alright. He never really wanted her either. He is sick with devotion for his daughter, his poor daughter who’s got something wrong in her head. He’ll do anything she asks, he’ll do everything for her.

He’s well-respected in their small community. You wouldn’t know a gentler man than Alex Arliss, who is soft-spoken and mild. It’s just such a shame that he doesn’t seem to want to remarry, but at least he dotes on his daughter. Maybe a little too much, but who can say he’s anything but a good father?

Even when she started acting out, when she started being abnormal with her temper (she must’ve taken after her mother), he was nothing but calm. Nothing but even. And he took care of her, and now his daughter only makes people a little bit nervous now. Better than afraid.

While he doesn’t go to church often, it’s because he sticks to tending to his struggling homestead. It’s not easy out here, in the middle of nowhere, but he makes do. He keeps a rosary around his wrist. Sometimes, he has his daughter wear it. She's all he has in this small town. She's all he has anywhere.

There is something that haunts his eyes as the years go on. But does it matter? He only seems to think of his daughter. None compare. He always has and he always will love her.

stats; mid-late 30s, coffee brown hair, haunted amber eyes, worn hands, aching joints, half-hearted smile.

more: DARCY ARLISS ; LOVED DAUGHTER

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i feel like i gotta write character introductions before i start talkig about them but ausffjkdjgh they're just blorbos in my mind... also i am looking for pro/comship oomfs pls n thank you

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welcome to my blog!

hi! call me toska. im 20 and i like southern gothic and fucked-up dynamics and writing about it. im a pro/comshipper so if you're anti, please get off here because it's not gonna get any better <3 not in the habit of blocking bc im lazy asf but if you keep bothering me i will block xoxo

tw:: in/cest; toxic relationships; grooming; sub/dom dynamics; cnc/dubcon; under/age; mental illness; religion; generally heavy content; angst, etc.

i'm gonna be writing some very heavy content for my OCs and this is where it's gonna land!

re: asks - feel free to send me anything, literally whatever lol. horny rants, thoughts and ideas, whatever I LOVE IT i love interaction. just send me anything, if it's too weird then i just won't answer xoxo

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