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RUSSIAN DOLL season two, episode seven: Matryoshka

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MAYBE THE POISON DRIPS THROUGH.

Kendall Roy (Succession. CR: @humanveil) / Mother and Child — Gustav Klimt / Autumn Sonata — Ingmar Bergman / The Journals of Sylvia Plath — Sylvia Plath / Fleabag — Phoebe Waller-Bridge (CR: limitedseries) / 1804/ Autobiography — Dan Pagis / Villanelle (Killing Eve) / Lindsay C. Gibson / Olivia Benson (Law & Order: SVU) / Sharp Objects — Gillian Flynn & Jean-Marc Vallée / Teaching My Mother How To Give Birth — Warsan Shire / Family Tree — Ethel Cain / The Lament for Icarus — Herbert Draper / Russian Doll — (CR: CTO, I found it on pinterest) / Stavros Kazantzidis / Susan Smith — Wych Elm / Antigonick — Anne Carson / Slaughterhouse — Yves Olade / The Return of the Prodigal Son — Guercino, 1619 / King Lear — Shakespeare

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russian doll season 2 when it talked about being your mothers daughter and her being her mothers daughter and how you can be so furious at someone and hate them but still love them because you know how much they struggled and how much they love you. when it said as much as you wish you could go back and untangle everything, you cant because the result of that tangled mess is you exactly as you are

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something that really got to me about russian doll s2 is how Nadia is so determined to explore the past that she practically abandons the present and because she does this she isn’t with Ruth when Ruth passes away. Nadia comes back from the time collapse and Ruthie, the best mother figure she had, has been dead for a month. Yes, series 2 is all about exploring integenarational trauma and being your mother’s daughter and learning how your past influences the present, but it also very heartbreakingly made the point that if you obsess over the past too much, you will miss being with the people you love in the present. And isn’t that just as (if not more) important as learning the past?

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god the scene with nadia running through the 2022 subway and the 1982 subway and the 1944 train as herself and her mother and her grandmother and literally being unable to escape their history and trama and this was always going to happen and the thin ice by motherfucking pink floyd is playing?

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“There was no other way.”

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i would like to thank russian doll for giving us annie murphy smoking a cigarette with an 80s blowout

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Unhinged ladies <3

From left to right: Nadia Vulvokov - Russian Doll, Grace LaDomas - Ready Or Not, Kimiko Miyashiro - The Boys, Bart Curlish - Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency, Nadja of Antipaxos - What We Do In The Shadows, Nix - Guns Akimbo, Harley Quinn - Birds of Prey, Crystal May Creasey - The Hunt, Jennifer Check - Jennifer’s Body, Kelly Maxwell - Ash vs Evil Dead, Nancy Downs - The Craft, Debbie Jellinsky- Addams Family Values, Mindy McCready - Kickass, Lila Pitts - The Umbrella Academy, Lucille Thorne - Crimson Peak, Barbara Kean - Gotham, Ravenna - Snow White and the Huntsman, Wednesday Addams - The Addams Family

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like a knife in the woods

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THE BEAR, 02.06 + Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents by Lindsay C. Gibson

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The Bear 1.04 x 2.08

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FROM, 1x02 "The Way Things Are Now"

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this line in the description for Yellowjackets really gets to me. "25 years later, they discover that what began in the wild is far from over." time and time again im just struck by how effective this show is at saying exactly what it feels like to go through life as a woman. you still have this girl inside you who is wild and childish and scared. she doesn't know how to move her body she doesn't know how to ask for what she wants she's a freak she's an idol she's a mess she's a messiah she's a witch and a wicked little beast she's the best friend a girl could have. but it's time to be an Adult Woman now! congratulations, you're out of the woods! we know that was confusing and traumatic for you but rest assured thats all done. maybe you'll have a husband and a teenager of your own maybe you'll be a politician maybe you're going to run a mlm. it doesnt matter, just make sure you're unrecognizable from the wild animal you were. you're supposed to be unrecognizable. you're supposed to have it together, you're supposed to be boring. strawberry lube is for bisexuals and goths. and teenagers. Please be more boring. this Whole Thing this whole charade of adulthood doesn't work if you don't keep it together. grow up! so you do. for a while it sticks. your family is doing fine, your career is doing fine, your meds are working fine, maybe you've been to a few rehabs but this last one was going fine. and 25 years later you look around at the not-real life you're supposed to want to be a part of, the one you put together exactly as per the instructions, and you realize... it doesnt end. you aren't out of the woods you're just stranded in a different part of them. you probably have another 25 years to go, minimum. "I think shit is gonna get a lot worse out here." your life is far from over but you can't keep living it like this. numbing yourself with substances to make it tolerable, or going full speed ahead toward something you don't even really want just to prove you're Doing It you're Assimilating, or feeling insane for still being haunted by 'ancient' history that really didn't happen that long ago, or cooking a fucking meatloaf for the husband that doesn't get you and the daughter that doesn't want to. if you're going to survive the monotony of adulthood the way you survived the chaos of adolescence, you're going to have to get wild again. you're going to have to go back. because the wilderness can be terrifying with its harsh elements its cruel indifference its lurking predators and blah blah blah but do you want to know what's even scarier? that endless stretch in all directions of sameness. stump, tree, stream, moss. stump, tree, stream, moss. have we passed this way already, have we taken this route before? tree tree tree tree tree for miles and miles and miles. that is the wild, too. unending. repetitive. barren. where it ends, so do you. it lasts your whole life, and it's far from over. you've got to find a way to survive it. again.

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I CAN’T WAIT FOR YOU TAI. I DON’T HAVE THAT KIND OF TIME.

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you know those lesbian breakup so bad you xxx memes? yeah, well. every yelllowjacket for real.

shauna shipman is so close to the one that inspired it all: lesbian breakup so bad you consider marrying a christian man and having two kids named brynleigh and hunter. except she’s shauna, so add some flavor and it’s: lesbian breakup (promptly followed by widowhood) so bad you cannibalize her, marry her idiot blonde man ex, have a kid, and only feel joy when you discuss murder.

van palmer, lesbian breakup so bad you move to fucking ohio.

taissa turner, lesbian breakup so bad you go into politics. (maybe your ex will even have to see you on tv, who knows!)

natalie scatorccio, lesbian breakup(s) so bad you’re not even sure who all you’ve technically broken up with, but you’re no longer phased by kidnapping, surveillance, or stalking by any of them, which says a whole lot.

lottie matthews, lesbian breakup (widowhood, rip laura lee) so bad you start a cult. followed by another lesbian breakup so bad you, uh, start another cult.

misty quigley, lesbian breakup so bad you run around with this fucking guy.

and finally, queen of bad lesbian breakups, jackie taylor, whose lesbian breakup was so bad she killed herself in a way that irrevocably altered the course of all her friends lives and potentially broke metaphysical laws of the universe!

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This is what I want: I want to grab my brother's hand and run back through time, losing years like coats falling from our shoulders.