transcephalopod

[transcephalopod]

the thing that bothers me the most about contemporary ace communities—which aren't just online anymore, and have pervaded LGBT spaces ime—is that these people take an ironically extremely reductive view on sex and sexuality that should be at odds to their cause. i used to identify as ace and i still fit what i think is the most classic and staunch definition of asexuality, having zero interest in the physical act of sex. i stopped identifying with the community though because instead of understanding or even truly caring about the way society views/weaponizes sexuality as a colonial tool of cisheteropatriarchy, white supremacy, ableism, etc etc etc it's just been reduced to pointless identity wank. ohhh you only want to fuck on wednesdays and on weekends but not when you're on your period and only with someone you've known for at least a year unless you really really like them before that, well you might just be ace! visibly disabled? ace. not white? well you're probably ace too, especially if you get too dangerously close to miscegenating the population—and that still won't stop the community from sexualizing you either. this isn't just "acecourse is still around in 2025" like there is a deeply rooted problem in how we have allowed a community founded by cishet homophobes, eugenicists, and radfems to cloak their bigotry in progressivism, how this is a tangible reflection of western society's political reactionism. the modern conception of asexuality and its widespread acceptance has enabled genuinely so much more tangible harm than good for ace and LGBT people and so tbh i'm glad you talk about it.

yes thank you!! it’s such a downgrade from “sex is an extremely personal thing and everyone has a unique relationship with it” to now just like.. you’re either ace or allo that’s it! it’s a binary! and i find it so so reductive and unhelpful to try to expand that binary to fit every conceivable variation inbetween instead of just doing away with it entirely and accepting that everyone has a different relationship with sexuality which doesn’t need a specific label for you to cram yourself into and expand to meet your personal feelings. there’s a reason sexuality is just meant to cover WHO you’re attracted to rather than the minute details of your attraction/sexual habits. the idea that everything needs a label and a flag has divided the lgbt community to the point that i think everyone’s kind of lost the plot

[transcephalopod]

as someone who shamelessly “haha yeah totally”s people i’m not close with to get to hear them go on about their actual opinions, there are a staggering amount of “gay ppl can have exceptions” bi people who legitimately believe that everyone deep down is “a little” bi or that gay people have just chosen a side and would be better off “letting themself” be bi. multiple irl people in lgbt spaces have told me the world would be better if everyone was just bi. & the fact that these people feel comfortable admitting to virtually a stranger that they think gay people don’t/shouldn’t actually exist is CRAZY

Not only that is crazy but how it seems that a lot of mspec people have this mindset while almost NO ONE calls them out.

[transcephalopod]

do you follow transgenderpolls? they literally get asexuals accusing them of being a terf for saying that the 'sexual' suffix in homosexual/bisexual/etc refers to gender. like i've seen this happen multiple times now and the context is literally always a poll that asexuals claim erases them bc the options are 'hetero, homo, bi' or something, and the blogrunner will be like "this poll doesn't exclude you. if you're gay and ace, the homosexual option applies to you. if you're aroace, the whole poll obviously doesn't even apply to you so just hit see results." and then despite NEVER having been excluded, a bunch of asexuals still go crying to the inbox of a literal transgender blog to call him transphobic for saying sex = gender because they refuse to understand latin roots. or they otherwise complain about a poll not catering to their specific "ace spectrum" identity even though polls have a limit of 12 options and it's obvious that asexuality just isn't relevant to the question. it's pretty funny ngl

can someone get these people real problems that require effort to solve so we can wean them off crying at strangers online for not walking on eggshells around their crushingly massive egos by *checks notes* using the commonly accepted words for things

[transcephalopod]

as stupid and annoying as i think most asexual-identifying people are, the moral ocd thing doesn't strike me as an ace [inclus]-specific thing. i have really severe ocd that tells me the DUMBEST shit about my gender and sexuality that i KNOW is not true, and since you said you have ocd yourself then you must know it's just not logical at all. i know i've made posts about it that were basically just me trying to reassure myself and i know for a fact that most ppl reading it would've thought i sounded insane. the OP of that post will probably look back on it on a day that their ocd isn't so bad and be like "what the fuck was i on about"

i genuinely do hope this is the case but you can't post homophobic shit online free of criticism. like i just don't think we need to be making positivity posts for people who don't want to write about gay sex. if this is a thing their moral OCD has fixed on they need to talk that through with friends or a therapist. not everything needs to be aired out in public, and while it's not a grievous moral failing or anything to have made posts like that while struggling with OCD, i don't think it should be encouraged.

[transcephalopod]

op turned off blogs on one of my favorite posts so here it is again

[transcephalopod]

i wish “your fave is aphobic” gimmick blogs would come back. morrigan would be aphobic ten thousand percent

morrigan is an aphobic lesbian and i won't hear any different

[transcephalopod]

tumblr. com/aroaceenjolras/779480533245870080?source=share

seeing this on my dash made me crazy. who is saying these things

needing reassurance that it's morally okay to not be like those nasty sexual allogays is just another example of tumblr users trying to subvert something that's already subverted and just ending up with the original viewpoint again

[transcephalopod]

You said you liked Dragon Age and I wanted to ask your fav game + companions?

dragon age origins is my favorite of the games by far and also the one i've played the most. i've finished a full run as every possible origin. that being said i also enjoyed DA2 and DAI. my favorite companions are zevran, anders, dorian, and morrigan but i love a lot of the others too lol

[transcephalopod]

Saying you're aphobe isn't a flex BTW, it's just saying you're a massive piece of shit who needs to leave people alone :)

actually its saying that my dick is huge and my opinions are correct

[transcephalopod]

hiii coworker anon back ^^ im making pride bracelets for them!!! making a bi bracelet for this older lady who has kids and im so so happy yaya!!!!

that's so cute! i hope they like them!

[transcephalopod]

all these people saying shit like "it's totally fine to have sex you don't like because your partner wants to! sex isn't a big deal at all!" man i guarantee you would not react the same if a random stranger grabbed your arm vs if they groped you. sex is not just like watching a movie or eating food you sort of dislike and you know it.

i feel like too many people on here don’t rlly Get how hard and traumatizing it can be to force yourself to have sex that you don’t want to have, especially with someone you have no sexual attraction to. it’s not “just like doing a chore” and i think if you’ve actually done that or tried to do it, you’d understand how unnatural and sickening it feels. it just irks me so bad how nonchalant people are about saying “you don’t have to be attracted to someone to have sex with them” because like .. yeah strictly speaking i guess not? like objectively that is true. but the majority of the time it’s a sentiment used against lesbians and a means to reinforce compulsive heterosexuality and it disregards how traumatizing that can be later down the line, and how damaging it is to your personal idea of sex. instead of like, the groundbreaking sexual liberation people seem to think it is

[transcephalopod]

HOLY SHIT YOURE BACK. I was just scrolling through my old discourse account from YEAAAARS ago and saw posts from you on there and then clicked on your account and was floored to find that you’re still active. Legit one of my fave accounts godddd we were in the trenches of discourse hell together😭😭😭😭how are you doing???

i only recently became active again! i'm doing really well irl re: academic/career stuff, and also with my bf <3

i actually think it's better for me to have somewhere i can complain about niche discourse stuff so I came back but i do remember being in the fucking trenches back in the day

[transcephalopod]

The fact that you’re still here is crazy keep fighting the good fight - formerly filthyallofrank lol

i do feel insane for coming back but these people are crazier for still being like this so

[transcephalopod]

Tangentially related to your bf acquirement. I met my now wife by bullying Yandere Dev. But it was a morally righteous bullying because fuck that guy

that's so fucking funny. chad move

[transcephalopod]

the reality is that acey-waceys NEED us. if we weren't around to make posts about how annoying they are, they wouldn't be able to have a victim complex about it and use it as "proof" that they're oppressed and thus feel "valid". bc that's all they give a shit about. so when you think about it, who REALLY does the most for the ace community?

i mean they could always fall back on the old "asexuals have the highest rate of conversion therapy" (if you count the therapist asking if you want to switch meds as conversion therapy) (don't question our methodology for how we came up with that statistic)

[transcephalopod]

soo was that ask from the inclus ex or

that person had extremely funny timing and it's the right level of unhinged but the inclus ex was fucking allergic to ever disagreeing with me to my face so def not

[transcephalopod]

of course the cis woman compares being annoyed with the notion that asexuality is lgbt to violent transphobia lmao. also she REALLY thought she ate with "Either start giving more of your time and energy to things that actually matter and accept people as they are, or go fuck yourself on a cactus. Your choice." asdfgfdfg

what's in the water that makes cis people think they have any leg to stand on wrt slinging TERF at someone whose url is TRANScephalopod