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$20 used to mean something

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I know that some British people take umbrage at Americans calling the Great British Bake Off relaxing, but it's just because GBBO is such a different kind of stressful from American baking shows.

American baking shows will be called something like "Cupcake Knife Fight", there's horror movie lighting everywhere and dramatic stings every 5 seconds. All of the contestants are shit talking each other and fist fighting over the one single deep fryer provided by production. It will show the judges all whispering to each other at their super villain table overlooking the whole kitchen, and one will be like, "Oh my god. Everyone look at Brenda right now. She's straight tanking it." And it will cut to Brenda, who is running around covered in flour and crying and also bleeding for some reason. Then you get a clip from an interview with one of the contestants, and they're like, "I really need to win this. Without this award money, I'm gonna need to close my restaurant, sell my dad, and live out of my car. AGAIN." Then the giant digital doomsday clock overhead lets out a horrid klaxon, the judges tell half of them that their cupcakes taste disgusting, and one of them gets eliminated and sent to walk down the dramatically-lit shame hallway never to be seen again.

Meanwhile GBBO is in a lovely, brightly colored tent, there are delightful and friendly hosts/jesters there to keep everyone entertained, and all of the B Roll is of like... a bumblebee going into a flower, or a lamb running in a field. And yes, there will be moments where someone will mess up their timing or something, and they'll be looking at their bake through the oven door like, "oh gosh I don't think this will rise in time!" Then they stand up to find Paul Hollywood directly behind them ominously. His creepy whitewalker eyes will glow white, and he'll say something like "the 12th of June. 2035. Drowning." And his eyes will go back to normal and he'll walk away. Then the baker gives a playful grimace to the camera and says "that didnt sound great, did it?". Cut to a sweet looking older woman sipping tea on a stool and she says "oo I do hope that Prue enjoys the taste of my sugary, sticky baps!". Then, at the end, someone gets a gold star for doing good, and the loser of the episode gets in the middle of a giant group hug. You see all of them at the end of the series at a giant carnival with their families and the post credits informs you that all of the contestants have become a Partridge Family-style traveling band and stayed friends forever.

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23 Layer Chocolate Cake (via Instagram)

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I thought you liked catholics?

That’s a fetish. Good for roleplay but not earnestly irl. I like their horny art. But ultimately the Catholic Church is an enemy of humanity.

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It's that time again

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silly seals from outer space

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me when i see an animal that is known for being in my area

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Over on my patreon, I just posted a big batch of daily diary comics from my trip to Alaska for comics camp! Here's a freebie :)

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unstoppable force (desire to write) vs immovable object (tired)

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Joust ⚔

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“I remember when I first realized I never had to have children. It was like walking out of a narrow alley into a wide open field. I never have to get married. I never have to date anyone. I don’t even have to care about sex. These realizations were like gifts that I gave myself.” ― Maia Kobabe, Gender Queer: A Memoir (Affiliate link)

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After three weeks of back-and-forth and a bit of confusion at the local print shop, I'm pleased to announce that June postcards for Postcard of the Month Club over on Patreon have gone out!

If you aren't a member of the PotMC tier, but would like to get this lovely group of well-dressed late-18th-century dancers anachronistically celebrating Pride, sign up before the end of the month, and they will be mailed to your home (or any address you provide me with) along with a brief handwritten note.

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🎶 workin' 9 to 5 🎶

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This blog is my adult version of cutting pictures out of magazines and glueing them on to paper

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Higgledy-piggledy unparliamentary green parrots quarrel outside in the trees

Squawking out epithets uncomplimentary Squads of unmannerly Oversized peas.