uhohspaghett1o

[uhohspaghett1o]

Comments are restricted but I 100% agree with this. We spend an entire game SEEING why tearing down the Veil is a bad thing, and the Breach was a FRAGMENT of the whole veil!

Plus Solas literally tells you everyone’s gonna fucking die when the veil goes bye-bye.

I know damn well that if it were literally any other character saying go tear down the veil, people wouldn’t be so eager to jump on the bandwagon.

love it that people say that bioware didn't fully explain to the players that tearing down the veil is bad when you spend a full game sealing a giant green hole in the sky.

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if you have a Reddit account, pls use the Reddit wrapped thing. Its hilarious.

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I don’t reblog a lot but these designs are peak fiction. So sassy, so dramatic, so overtly theatrical. It fits their goofy asses so much. They’re serving cunt and storming heaven ✨✨✨✨

[ - Magisters Sidereals - ]

And each was promised Power and glory beyond all reckoning If they would only come to the feet of the gods and ask. And so they joined in secret, telling none Who were not of the temples of their designs. And in Minrathous, in the heart of the Archon a sliver of fear grew, Stabbing like a wound. Though he knew not why. —Silence 1:1-1:17, Dissonant Verse

They'll be featured in some Fade/flashback scenes later on in my fanfic 'Nothing but ambition where hearts once beat' so I decided to come up with some fun designs for these 7 bastards ♡

I was definitely going for that "you're playing with the big boys now" vibe from Prince of Egypt, lmao.

[uhohspaghett1o]

Corypheus had a wife. Meaning he most likely had children, considering that House Amlaradis is still around.

What does this mean?

I can, legally,

call Corypheus a DILF.

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My greatest duality is deep diving way too much into a character who just isn’t that deep, and then calling that same character my pathetic lil’ man who can’t do nothing right (affectionately).

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OKAY. Okay.

I think Corypheus sees his younger self in the Inquisitor. I think he thinks they’re like him, in a way.

Why else would he go all, “let’s see who is truly worthy of godhood”? Because he thinks the Inquisitor aspires for that, just as he does. He has no reason to believe the Inquisitor wants godhood, but he projects himself onto them.

And in a way, the Inquisitor is like Corypheus: someone thrust into religious power and prestige, working under a God that never was. Someone who was believed to be chosen by this God, only to be deceived, and eventually discovering that this God was no more a God than they were a chosen one.

Of course Corypheus would possibly see himself in them, especially if the Inquisitor is a devout Andrastian; the Inquisitor is what he once was: someone who believed they were chosen, and truly wanted to better the world in the name of their God.

It’s probably why he also really emphasizes that the Maker isn’t real! He was absolutely shattered after finding out Dumat was false, so he’s trying to break the Inquisitor exactly as he was broken.

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Just a reminder that being an ‘abuse victim’ doesn’t make a person infallible when they’re hurting people en masse.

Oh and here’s a list of horrible things Solas has done (completely unrelated trust me)

Helped Mythal essentially tranquilize the Titans, who were just scared and didn’t want people draining their blood from them to make themselves bodies.

Also basically helped commit a mental genocide of the dwarves, who he refers to as “severed arms imitating life” in Inquisition.

Destroyed Elvhenan by creating the Veil after Mythal bit the dust, condemning EVERY elf to being enslaved by the then-fledgling Imperium.

Killed Felassan because he gave two shits about the modern elves (I know Felassan definitely did bad shit, but really)

Stole the eluvians from Briala, ruining any chance for a modern slave rebellion (huh, it’s almost like he doesn’t care about modern elves AT ALL)

Gave Corypheus the orb and planned for him to die in the explosion so he could come and tear down the Veil.

Tried to tear down the Veil. Again. “Oh the events of Veilguard wouldn’t have happened if Solas succeeded” yeah the events of Veilguard wouldn’t have happened if Solas didn’t decide to try and tear down the Veil even after being “proven wrong” about modern people.

Doesnt. See. Modern. People. As. Alive.

Killed Flemythal for Mythal’s power.

Presumably had no plans to save the humans, dwarves, or Qunari. Funny how the ‘if Solas succeeded’ concept art exclusively shows elves, huh?

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I think Veilguard would’ve won GOTY if I could kiss Ghilan’nain tbh. Or if the Architect came back and I could kiss him. Or if Corypheus came back (for the millionth time) and I could kiss him too.

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If I see Halla Lavellan fanfiction again I’m gonna start shipping her with Ghilan’nain because Halla are Ghilly’s creation and it’d be really funny.

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I beef with Veilguard a lot but Ghilan’nain’s movements are so goofy and exaggerated and I love them. Like okay girl go off, be a dramatic queen. They’re so theatrical and it’s peak.

Actually all the darkspawn villains have been really fucking cunty and it’s hilarious. The Architect is in a perpetual state of serving cunt, and Ghilan’nain is pretty much right behind him. Corypheus has his heels and dramatic monologues that’d put Robert Browning to shame, so he’s included.

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Ghilanrook but they’re both girlfailures that try to do evil shit but somehow get thwarted comically every time. Like “let’s release the Blight on someone lol” and it accidentally reacts with the person’s immune system and cures the cancer they don’t even know they had.

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What tag am I missing to finally be freed from this stupid ship? I still see it on my dash.

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The fastest I’ve ever clicked a dialogue option in my life was choosing not to have Lavellan rekindle with Solas, because holy shit that monologue she goes off on does not give, “true love” vibes. It gives, “I’m incapable of moving on because my character revolves around my male love interest”

Maybe 14yr old me would’ve loved it, but I’m not exactly 14 anymore. That ending unironically gave the vibes of dependency (not codependency, because Solas seems like he’d drop her ass first chance).

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The way Rook should’ve beaten the Evanuris was just having them sit in a room with Rook and listen to their weird therapy talk and hand puns. The Evanuris would just say “ah hell nah” and jump off the ledge of the Lighthouse to escape.

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The Magisters Sidereal badly summarized

The pope of big ass lizard #1 has schizophrenia and convinces the other popes of big ass lizards to break-and-enter into heaven because “it came to me in a dream”. Also they all want to be God. Surprise! Heaven is going through an emo phase and gives the pope(s) zombie AIDS. Forced geriatric nap time ensues while nefarious lizards give everyone zombie AIDS- but wait! The popes are alive! Pope of pretty things has dementia and is now a civil rights activist for zombies with AIDS, and schizophrenia pope really likes empty chairs. All the other popes were evaporated by the power of abandoned plot lines.

Dementia pope thinks everyone should have zombie AIDS because he gives them fancy tinfoil hats that protect them from the nefarious lizard mind control ray of doom. Sadly these tinfoil hats require the blood of someone with zombie HIV that is really zombiephobic to the zombie AIDS. You will never see him again.

Schizophrenia pope had a very messy breakup with his favorite big ass lizard after seeing an empty chair and is now suing for 100% of its assets, including its godhood, and he is making that EVERYONE else’s problem. Also he used a very poor bowling ball to give the sky a prolapsed anus that is birthing demons.

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Going on the Mythal tag is like walking into no-man’s land for someone who has every Solavellan/Solavellan adjacent tag filtered. You’ll see like one post about Mythal surrounded by five thousand Solavellan posts. Like I'm fighting for my life here.

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More disaster lesbians for the weary heart (lowkey obsessed with them)