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[vampireheart2404-blog]

How “The Last Jedi” broke me

*BEWARE: Spoilers probably somewhere*

Star Wars and I go way back. It’s a complicated relationship to say the least. We had our ups and downs. We had our moments of pure passion and joy and we had our disappointments and conflicts, but we always remained together. Simpy put, it’s love.

I believe context matters so let me give you brief history of my experiences with Star Wars. It’s important to understand the point I am at at this moment. 

I had the misfortune of being born in Bosnia and as if that wasn’t annoying enough, during my early childhood, between ages three and seven, there was a huge war going on and let’s just say movies weren’t exactly a priority, given all the destruction, death and overall misery. To put it simply, movies like “Raiders of the lost Ark”, “Back to the Future”, “E.T.” were something that was introduced to me a bit later in life. Star Wars saga being no exception. Sure, I knew that there is a guy in a black costume that breathes funny, there were two suns and there were people called Luke and Leia. Even under my rock, I heard some of the names and had the idea how the movie looks like. For most of my generation, it was the same thing. Star Wars as a whole just wasn’t big enough part of our childhoods.

Unfortunately, I was first introduced to the Star Wars saga through the prequel trilogy. I didn’t like it. I just thought they were incredibly boring and gave up on the franchise all together. Until one day, when I decided that it’s time to watch those original movies and wouldn’t you know it - I fell in love. And now, I can’t imagine my life without Star Wars - it’s characters, it’s music, it’s visuals, it’s poetry, it’s cultural impact. It’s a part of me and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Over the years, lots had changed. But the most important change was the internet. I grew up and developed critical thinking. I started watching three, four or even five movies a week and became a huge movie buff and started thinking about movies in other ways than just: “It was fun, I loved it” or “It was boring and I hated it”. I started asking questions: “What is it that makes The Phantom Menace so boring to me?”, “Why does everyone say The Revenge of the Sith is good, when I can almost see no difference between it and Attack of the Clones”? And I loved going online and discuss it. For years it was the same thing - hating the prequels with burning passion and loving the original trilogy with all my heart. The flaws in the original trilogy didn’t bother me, because I loved it so much and I couldn’t understand why people pretend like it’s the most perfect piece of cinema there is. I also couldn’t get enough of talking about how much the prequels suck or understand how people could find anything of value in those movies. As you can see, there was this attempt to observe the movies as objectively as possible, without much success and there was endless discussion on the internet with fanboys on all sides of the spectrum.

Which brings us to The Force Awakens. As I’ve already stated, it was the greatest movie going experience of my life and I will never forget it. And I loved the movie. It did bother me that it was too similar to the original Star Wars. It was safe and marketable and although I enjoyed it very much, it did bother me, I won’t lie. Rogue One was fine. Whatever.

And now we come to the big one, the one that will kill all expectations, the one that will divide fans once again, the second biggest movie opening of all time: Star Wars: The Last Jedi. When I first watched it, I wanted to write a review on it. Like a real review, where I would talk about stuff that I think it’s good and stuff that’s not good with conclusion being that I loved it very much. I thought the choices were very bold and innovative. I liked the performances, I loved the dynamic between Rey and Kylo Ren and I even enjoyed the silly stuff. But, when I saw what’s going on online, the rage, the backlash, the rift between the critics and the fans and all that noise, I realized one thing - I am tired. I am so freakin’ tired of this. I saw so many online reviewers just walking on eggshells, trying not to say anything. If they say they loved it, maybe they’re regret it later. Same with people who hated it. “Maybe I need to see it the second time or the third time just to make sure I didn’t miss something”. So, for any other movie, you watch it once and give your honest opinion, but for Star Wars, you have to go multiple times just to give your opinion? Give me a fucking break. At this point, I want to stand up and shout: IT’S JUST A FUCKING MOVIE! God, damn it. And it’s not the fact that I liked the movie and that people hate it. If you don’t like, you don’t like it. It’s fine really. All of the complaints are heard. It’s me. I am so tired of it. I agree that the scene in Canto Bight was stupid but I can’t talk about it in such detail. It’s just a stupid scene in a movie. Who gives a shit. Bottom line: I used to care so much about every little detail in these movies and now - I just didn’t care. 

So, there was only thing to do: Star Wars movie marathon of course. I usually watch them in order of their releases, but this time I watched them in this order: 1. Episode I, Episode II, Episode III, Rogue One, Episode IV, Episode V, Episode VI, Episode VII and I went and saw Episode VIII again. I can honestly say I never had more fun with Star wars movies in my life. I watched them on my couch, drinking hot chocolate with Christmas lights all around me and without being a part of an online obsession with the new release, I felt free and enjoyed the saga more that I ever did before. I know that sounds cheesy but it’s the way I felt. 

In conclusion, I am sick of Star Wars being this huge overblown thing where every frame is discussed for hours. I am sick of people having an orgasm every time something even remotely nostalgic happens and having a stroke when something happens that they think doesn’t fit. I always knew Star Wars was never meant to be taken this seriously, but this is the first time I felt it. These movies are never gonna stop coming out and when I imagine the future where I spent hours, days, months, even years talking about every single plot point, it seems like a huge waste of time that I could spend watching the movies and having a blast. When I say that I’m done and that these are just movies it may seem as if I am not admitting their importance, but it’s quite the opposite: I watched eight movies in a row and felt nothing but happiness doing it. Any movie franchise that is able to do that is worth being talked about. I just don’t want to share my love or frustrations anymore. It feels more intimate that way. 

If you still have the strength to praise, complain, cry, yell or else, by all means, go for it. I am just done. Thank you, The Last Jedi. You broke me. And I couldn’t be happier. 

May the Force be with you, always!

[vampireheart2404-blog]

All I wanna do is sleep. 

[vampireheart2404-blog]

To say I love Star Wars saga is an understatement. I fucking adore it. It captured my heart long time ago and every movie going experience is incredibly precious to me. Last night, I watched the newest instalment of the saga and I absolutely loved it. The dynamic between Kylo Ren and Rey is what made this movie for me and I can’t wait to see it again on Sunday. I hope that I will be able to write a real review, because I am all about feeling right now and that doesn’t a good critic make :)

Go see it and form your own opinion. 

May the Force be with you!

[vampireheart2404-blog]

[vampireheart2404-blog]

Who am I.

Hello everyone. 

My biggest problem in life is that I am my own worst critic. Sometimes I feel like I am torturing myself over things that are just not that important and are probably just fine. Like this opening text. Up to this moment, I have been trying to write some kind of “introduction” to this blog and deleted all of it because it sounded either stupid or downright shallow. 

The truth is, it’s complicated for me to explain why is at this point in my life so important to me to write something every day, because nothing monumental happened that inspired me to do so. It’s just a simple combination of me always being an opinionated person with lots of interests and having more time for myself. Although a cliche, I found the “it’s the little things that make life beautiful” saying to be absolutely true and started appreciating those little things every day. That’s why I decided to write something that happened to me that day, no matter how big or small. Wheter it’s a movie I watched and my opinion on it or an actual real life situation that affected me, or even just my opinion on a subject that is important to me on that day - I am going to share it all. And to be fair to everyone that will maybe choose to follow my thoughts in the future, I will now share with you stuff I am probably going to talk about the most:

I love individuality and freedom of speech. That is what is most important to me. I will 100% always be in the corner of free speech. I often find myself being on opposite side of what is modern or politically correct. I care about difference of opinion, ideas, discussions, honesty and logic. 

I love movies and appreciate every single aspect of movie making. I love talking about movies with others, share opinions and ideas, even fight, if necessary. I watch at least three movies a week and there’s always something to talk about when it comes to art of filmmaking. It’s one of my favourite things to do. TV shows I like as well.

I love reading books, cooking, playing video games, snow, night sky and stars. I love gothic rock, poetry and cigarettes. I love beer, pool and playing cards. I love drinking coffee with my friends, talking with my boyfriend, visiting my parents and traveling. Oh, boy, do I love to travel. 

There is lots more, but my boss is calling me to have a meeting, so I will have to finish this. Welcome to my blog! You are welcome to ask me anything. 

Lots of love and see you tomorrow! :)