vbluesss
vbluesss
Neo Nine
45 posts
multifandom artist! | DNI proshippers
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vbluesss · 14 hours ago
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I gotta admit, I'm really surprised by how the dynamic between Rick and Morty has evolved throughout the show.
At first it was a super one-sided relationship, where Rick was the genius, totally in control, dragging his grandson into messed up situations without caring much about what happened to him (except for those rare moments when he actually did care), Morty on the other hand, was the "dumb" sidekick who didn't know anything an was constantly humiliated, not just in adventures but in his everyday life (I’ll never forget that memory where Rick pushes him down the stairs just to embarrass him in front of some girls).
What's interesting is that since then Morty started develop this deep resentment toward Rick, and unlike his mother and sister, he did not idealize him, he saw Rick for who he really is.
“I wanted you to have a normal life, that’s something you can’t have when Rick shows up.
Everything real turns fake. Everything right is wrong.
All you know is that you know nothing and he knows everything.
He’s not a villain, Summer, but he shouldn’t be your hero. He’s more like a demon, or a super fucked up god.”
Whe the purge episode came out, I thought that if things kept going this way, Morty might actually end up killing Rick someday. Not in the sense that he would become Evil Morty, it's just... He was clearly full of repressed rage.
"Fuck you Rick! I'll purge you too, you old rickety piece of crap. This has been a long time coming! I'm gonna rip your fucking guts out and smear them all over you face!"
Then the third season premiered and in the very first episode, Morty shot Rick with the intention of killing him! Scenes like these made me so invested in their dynamic, but especially in Morty's development. Sooo here's a little analysis about it!
In early seasons, Morty hated Rick. He totally wanted to kill him at some point, but ofc he wouldn't because:
He was kinda ashamed of this violent part of himself.
Rick is his granda, and if only because of the family bond, he still cares about him.
We're talkin' about Rick Sanchez, motherfucker, like Morty ever stood a chance (or at least that what Morty thought, since we now know that it is not impossible.)
Anyway, the point is Morty was seriously done with Rick's crap, but it's not like he had much choice. They're family, and on top of that, Morty did enjoy the adventures. So he just tolerated it.
Thing's went on like that for a while, Morty started standing up to Rick more and more, and often paid the price of Rick's ego (The Vat Of Acid is the best example) but they always had a strong bond, bla bla bla.
But let's not to forget how Rick constantly manipulated him. I still remember this lines:
"I just took over the family Morty- and if you tell your mom or your sister any of this I'll deny it, and they'll take my side because I'm a hero"
"You can die when I say so. I control you. I control the universe!"
Just adding to the whole "Rick is a god" thing. Morty is perfectly aware, better than anyone else in the family, that Rick is a bad person and had a lot of power over everyone. Up to this point he even handled abandonment quite well, Beth and Summer were the ones who seemed more affected by it.
Still, Morty admires Rick. He needs him. He wants to be around him. As Rick had his moments of real care and and saved Morty, not just for convenience, but genuine affection. Also they got along pretty well.
In "Rest and Ricklaxation" it's even said outright that Rick has an irrational attachment to Morty, and I'd say that Morty also has an irrational attachment to Rick! Because again, he knows who Rick really is. But after so many adventures and those tiny moments of kindness, he can't help but cling to him.
Over time, Morty got more of his own voice, going from being a simple sidekick to being a companion (but not totally equal), and for his part, Rick started to respect his grandson more too (even if the power dynamic hadn't totally shifted)
Then their relationship becomes straight-up codependent.
Let's not forget the crows! That episode wrecked Morty emotionally, and man, I get it! The whole thing about being replaced was nothing more than an empty threat, the crows a way to annoy him. Until it happened. Rick replaces him and dumps him. Then when Rick comes back it's not even for Morty, it's because the crows dumped him first. But Morty still chooses him. Why? because he has no one and nothing else.
Even when Morty has the chance to start a new life far away from Rick, he choose to stay. The truth is that chaos and adventures with Rick is all he's ever known. How do you walk away from the one thing you've built your identity around?
Then S6E2, "Rick: A Mort Well Lived" happens. Morty's most independent, self-aware part gets trapped in a video game... I always feel that like a loss, but I guess it was necessary in some kind of way????? Idk... Anyways, I really liked the direction they took with Morty's codependency and fear of abandonment. After Marta (Morty's fragment) choose to stay in the game, I feek like Morty become more dependent on Rick.
But it's not just Morty who changes, it's also Rick.
Before the crows leave him, he ends up learning a bit about empathy (I think that's what it was) and recognizes that what he and Morty have is toxic, blablabla. I won't expand on this because the analysis is focused on Morty, not Rick, but I want to emphasize the sentence he says in S6E10, "Ricktional Mortpoon's Rickmas Mortcation"
"You called me boring! I've become dog shit to you"
Rick realizes he's lost control over Morty, and acts like the victim because he feels like one. Their bond is more damaged than ever because there is no balance between them. Things were tense since before the crows, add to that the revelation that Morty is not Rick's original grandson, and the Prime oobsession. Things keep spiraling... Still, by the end of the episode Rick brings Morty into the Prime hunt.
Now that I've already mentioned Prime we can go back to Morty, because after they finally found him and Rick got his unsatisfactory revenge, Morty was left marked by Evil Morty words:
"What happens if Rick actually kills this guy? You ever think about that? Maybe he'll kill himself next."
Next episode we see that Rick stopped having adventures for a while to start drinking too much, clearly depressed after the events of the previous episode. Again, this shakes up his bond with Morty.
Past all this, we finally get to one of the best episodes! The first one that really focuses on Morty's psychology: S7E10, Fear no Mort.
(SIDE NOTE: Before that! Something super important happens earlier: His breakup with Planetina (S5E3). Remember what he said to Beth?
"My whole life I've never fit in anywhere. Everything I have to say is always met with an eye roll, as if the act of hearing what I have to say is some exhausting chore. Nobody in this family thinks I can say or do anything right. I've been all over the universe, meet hundreds of people, and Planetina's the only one I've ever meet that makes me feel like I belong."
In Morty's words (and as we have seen throughout the series) there's no one, not even his own family, who doesn't treat Morty like he's an idiot. Everyone just seems tired of dealing with him. Morty always noticed it, cause he's not dumb like people thinks he is. It's not until he feels he's finally formed a real, honest, loving and (in his eyes) healthy connection that he confronts, in this case, his mom for trying to break them up.
The part “Planetina's the only one I've ever met that makes me feel like I belong” reflects more than just teenage love. It's coming from someone who has been ignored, treated as annoying and irrelevant by his classmates, teachers, his family, and also, of course, Rick too.
Honestly, I think that after the breakup, Morty became even more emotionally vulnerable. Like, it made him cling to Rick even more because, as awful as Rick can be, he's still the only one who actually spends time with Morty, that listens to him (even if it's while complaining), and shown Morty that he matters to someone, even if it's just so Rick can use him.
When Morty breaks up with Planetina because she killed innocent people, his idealized, perfect vision of his girlfriend finally shatters. The problem isn't that Planetina killed people (Rick has already done that, even Morty killed before), the real issue is that there is no way to sustain this unrealistic vision Morty had for her anymore. She was supposed to be his safe space, something outside the caos. But after that, there's no way he can keep pretending she's who he thought she was.
This leaves a mark. And in the end, Morty goes to adventures with Rick as usual.
At this point, after so many adventures and failed relationships, Morty has internalized so much Rick's worldview. Since the pilot, Rick's been planting the idea that it should be just the two of them, going on adventures together forever and ever. Rick and Morty at 100 years, an emotional trap disguised as a fun promise of adventures from which Morty cannot escape, not only because circumstances have molded him to adapt Rick's vision of the world, love, his own worth and morality, but also because a big part of his identity revolves around Rick).
With all that said, we can finally talk about Fear No Mort!
First off, when they "come out" of the hole, Morty notices Rick staring into it looking genuinely sad, so he admits he's afraid of being responsible for his sadness.
"Hey Rick, you just looked real sad, which I’m afraid of. You know, of being responsible for your sadness.”
Then, once they're back to, Morty imagines basically an entire life with Rick by his side. At this point Morty can no longer project himself, even in his imagination, without him! And then it hits him: Rick was never really there in the first place. That's when Morty finally figures out what he's truly afraid of:
"I know what I'm afraid of! I'm afraid that you'd never say that [that he is irreplaceable] in real life. I'm afraid that if I jumped into a hole, you wouldn't even bother jumping in after me. You'd just stand there and watch. This entire thing has been about me! You're not even in the hole, are you?!"
THIS MOMENT. THIS IS THE EXACT MOMENT WHERE IT BECOMES CLEAR THAT MORTY IS EMOTIONALLY DEPENDENT ON RICK. His fear of rejection doesn't compare to his fear of meaning nothing to Rick, and the fact that his entire life now revolves around him.
The fear of relying on Rick.
So! Morty's no longer the same scared kid of early seasons who got dragged into adventures against his will, and slowly started resenting his grandpa to such extent that (in some moments) he thought about killing him. Not because he truly wanted to, deep down, but because the anger and frustration took over.
Now after everything that has been though (being replaced, literally losing the most rebellious part of himself, and suffering from a broken heart) Morty's now fully Rick Sanchez's grandson. Someone who enjoys adventures, no longer hesitate to kill people (his whole moral compass is another topic on its own), and who is totally unable to let go of his grandpa because is all he has, but also the only thing he wants too, since there's nothing better out there or on earth waiting for him.
Morty isn't trying to escape Rick anymore, he just wants to be loved by him.
The issue is that Morty reached a point where he needs Rick to feel like somebody. Right now he's emotionally dependent on Rick in an extreme way. It wasn't always like this, Morty used to care about him (or at least respect him), but he also kinda hated him. Thanks to all his arc and now that Rick's been slowly changing in recents seasons, Morty can live with this, even with his doubts and with the conscious fear that Rick doesn't love him or might leave him again, he's so hurt at this point that he'll take whatever Rick gives.
So yeah, we've gone from a Morty who was aware Rick was hurting him and still called him out, to one's who's fully resigned to this life.
(I bring back the scene where he had the opportunity to leave his life with Rick behind when Evil Morty offered him a way out of the Central Finite Curve. Rick admits that's the best option cause he has no plan, and we see the exact moment when Morty resigns and decides to stay with Rick, DESPITE what happened with the crows).
And you know why? Because Rick is changing too. Slowly, painfully, but it's happening. And Morty doesn't love Rick because he's good.
He loves him because that's the most he can expect from love.
To conclude:
Before, Morty had normal concerns. He wanted to go to school, be with Jessica (I miss her), and form a life like any other teeanger. Rick was something he tolerated because he was his grandpa, but clearly not the center of his life.
Now, that changed completely. He doesn't really have those desires anymore, now, what he wants is to go on adventure. He wants to keep exploring the universe with Rick, because its the only he has left and also, it's become the only thing he's truly passionate about. I'm not saying that he cannot fall in love again and be a regular teenager someday, but his priorities have shifted.
He genuinely enjoys those adventures, but specially enjoys being with Rick. He respects him, admires him, challenges him, understands him... and even with all the pain, he wants to stay by his side. For a 100 years.
Wow! this got way out of hand. It all started when I was like "Man, I miss when Morty used to stood up to Rick". Then the new episode dropped, and hey, turns out current Morty is confronting Rick again! I know they had arguments before, but that was mostly because their bond was super tense, almost broken. And in those fights, Rick always played the victim and Morty ended up feeling bad, like he was the one in the wrong. But now, in the first episode we get a clearly parallel between Morty and Evil Morty (that's a different topic I could go on about- I'll just say I think it perfectly shows why Morty would never become Evil Morty: because he loves Rick). And in the most recent one, beat the crap out of Rick for being an asshole, totally deserved.
Their behavior in this episode really made me think, it’s like Rick and Morty’s personalities are kinda... swapping places. Morty’s turning more into Rick (stronger, more assertive) and Rick’s becoming a bit more like Morty (more human, more vulnerable) But neither of them has stopped being who they are at the core.
Also, I gotta say, I love how their relationship is way more balanced now! Rick actually treats Morty with a bit more respect, and Morty’s pretty much on the same level as Rick when they go on adventures. They finally see each other as equals and treat each other like actual family (a super dysfunctional one, sure, but one that’s trying to get better). Honestly, it’s been a really nice shift. And that’s what surprises me the most.
I’ve been a fan since the beginning, and I NEVER thought they’d canonically turn their relationship into something this wholesome, because this show’s always been about tearing down traditional stuff: love, good vs evil, heroes, family, all that. But now? They’re actually giving us this slow redemption arc. Not just for Rick and Morty, but for the whole Smith family, piecing themselves back together from all the damage. Ooobviously Rick and Morty’s relationship isn’t perfect, but compared to how it all started? It’s honestly too wholesome sometimes. I used to think it’d stay toxic and abusive forever!
I just really hope that with Rick changing now, they don’t forget about Morty’s growth. Just because Rick’s evolving doesn’t mean Morty’s wounds magically disappeared. He faced his fears down in the hole, but that doesn’t mean he’s over them, he’s just living with the trauma now. (Even the line at the end of the new episode makes it super clear Morty’s still scared, or so I think.) But I'm sure they won't ignore it. We’re still seeing Rick fall into that self-pity mode, and Morty is aware of it.
I’m genuinely excited to see where they take things from here!!!
Anyway, there’s so much more I could’ve talked about, but it was 3 a.m., I was half-asleep and my body hurt all over, plus there are already tons of deep dives out there about their dynamic. What I wanted to do here was just focus on Morty’s evolution. That’s my little contribution! [:
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vbluesss · 6 days ago
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I really like summer, she's cool and everything, but I also hate her because she treats morty similar to how my older brother treats me
sooo if this doesn't look in characther that's why, it's based on me and my brother
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vbluesss · 6 days ago
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just because the show had incest jokes and other weird shit doesn't mean you should be ok with it, or say people "be fr" for being disgusted with that
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vbluesss · 7 days ago
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This video contains spoilers for fanfic: „Relative Dissonance”, by @skimmingthesurfaces
My silly jabberings under the cut:
I’m sooo happy that I finished this animatic much sooner than I expected! I know it isn’t perfect and I could do more with it, but I’m still satisfied that it is longer than 2 minutes (I have a little trouble staying focused on one project haha). Plus, in the middle of the project the program refused to cooperate and I had to do some things blindly, hoping it would look good xD
I had quite the challenge with drawing characters - most of my life I spent dealing with human anatomy, animals were definitely neglected by me xd It was especially hard with drawing hedgehogs, I don’t know why xD (I’m sorry Sonic, you’re my least favourite to draw xD)
Compared to the fanfic, I changed some small things in the scenes, so they would match the song; like the order of events or dialogues. I hope the author won’t hold it against me xD
Most of the electronic stuff I made up – just found some pictures on the internet and smashed them together, hoping it’ll look like I know what I was doing xD so please ignore any inaccuracy
I’m kinda angry with myself regarding the issue of Miles’ mask. I didn’t do a good job of showing that he has this mask, and because of that viewers can be confused in the scene where Tails is talking with Sonic from his dimension. Unfortunately I realized that when I was already at the end of the animatic, and honestly I had no idea how I could fix it. Sooo forgive me for this mistake. But hey, maybe it will encourage someone to read the fanfic haha xD
What pains me the most is that I couldn’t include all the moments I love from the fanfic. Maybe I’ll find some time to make few short comics?
And now, for those who stayed till the end - exclusive clip of the first version of this animatic! Originally, the animation was going to be much shorter and with a different song, but I decided I wanted to show more of this story. So, here you have a short excerpt I made before changing my mind.
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vbluesss · 7 days ago
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A Tails & Nine PMV - Lighter
All credits in the video!
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vbluesss · 8 days ago
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I'm so close to get a Miami Morty, I can feel it....!!!! I am also desperately looking for an Arcade Morty I CAN'T FIND HIM </3
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vbluesss · 13 days ago
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it's over, isn't it
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vbluesss · 13 days ago
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Mystery can we start a Sonic Prime positivity post? It feels like everywhere I go in the fandom, people are bashing and hating on it and that makes me sad. 🥺 What are everybody’s favorite things about it?
I’ll start: It’s visually beautiful and has a fantastic voice cast, good music, and one of my favorite Shadows. ❤️🖤
Absolutely, my dear! We can make today a Sonic Prime Appreciation Day. We’ll make the next 24 hours all about Prime. This can range between shoutout to fandom creators, fan theories, analyses on the show, character highlights, and more! Send it my way and we can gush about the Gummy Beans!❤️✨
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AUGH! The crew really did a good job with Prime. Prime!Shadow is definitely up there as a fave!
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vbluesss · 14 days ago
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A little Matrix Morty rant
I need somewhere to ramble about him because the amount of stupid takes I’m seeing are driving me crazy.
“Morty’s character development was erased” WRONG
“Morty prime is going to become like Emorty” WRONG
The purpose of S8 Ep1 was NOT to turn Morty prime into evil morty. People who complain that his character development has been undone have grossly misunderstood the episode. The episode intentionally draws parallels between Morty Prime and Evil Morty to show that Emorty is not special or unique. He directly fucking says it “if you’ve ever been sick of him then you’ve been evil”. It is NOT to set up a character arc of Morty becoming the next Emorty
(although I do think it would be cool to have him start down that path and have him realise what’s happening)
EMorty is not uniquely intelligent he just has more/different trauma which forces him to rely on himself and employ his skill set far more than Prime morty. We see time and time again that prime morty is not stupid and in fact is rather bright (his affinity for alien langs, constant bomb diffusal, using ricks tech). But let’s look specifically at the trauma Matrix morty endured to become so similar to Emorty, in particular let’s focus on what differs from things he’s already endured. It’s not the war itself, it’s not the murdering of other people: he has already murdered countless individuals
It’s loss. Rick falls asleep, Summer abandons him and CJ, his comrade- brother in arms, dies right in front of him. Morty hasn’t experienced loss like that, not really. In Fear No Mort he discovers that his fear is Rick abandoning him because although it hasn’t happened, he believes it to be plausible; he’s constantly being told how replaceable he is. Thus, morty fears the kind of self reliance that defined Emorty
(Also to wholly and completely turn him into Emorty would be a vile character assassination and incredibly lazy writing as the major thing separating morty from Rick is his morality and emotional nature.)
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vbluesss · 14 days ago
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everyone calls miami morty a "transfem icon". I call him a nonbinary icon.
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vbluesss · 16 days ago
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Me rambling about Arcade Morty down below, Rick and Morty s8 ep3 spoilers, is really just incoherent rambling I don't think half of it is even correct
Drawing Parallels between Arcade Morty and his want for freedom vs Evil Morty and his want for freedom. Both left feeling unsure and alone after they finally get what they want. The only difference is Evil Morty wants to be alone and has no care for other Mortys wheras Arcade Morty did everything he could to save the other Mortys just to let them go again at the end so they could all have the freedom they wanted.
For me, I think Arcade Morty isnt really "free", I think his ideal freedom was when the Mortys lived on the asteroid together. But he's obviously very loyal and cares alot for his alternate selves and put their happiness ahead of his own even though he easily could have just taken them back to the asteroid to start a new town and none of them would've spoken up about it. Its almost like he traded his freedom for theirs, while Evil Morty traded everyone else's 'freedom' for his own, if that makes sense. Like, he killed all of these alternate versions of Rick and Morty just so he could get his freedom (and yet he still isn't satisfied). Maybe I'm just reading into the Arcade Morty character wrong idk I've watched it once at 6:30am this morning.
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vbluesss · 16 days ago
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i just thought of something: a rick sanchez hug analysis
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rick and morty have hugged before, and rick has also hugged beth, and summer before, so, i can think of ANOTHER reason why rick won't hug morty...
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in solaricks when the ship crashes, and rick walks out i wonder if rick actually collapsed on his knees, and when morty runs up to try and hug rick, rick stops him, i'm wondering if him stopping morty was more of a "wait, let me stand up" rather than a "stop, don't come near me". because i didn't get the sense that rick didn't want morty near him.
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in both solaricks and unmortricken rick gets hugged. i believe the reason rick didn't hug summer back in solaricks, or hug morty back in unmortricken is due to aftermath of the draining, intense, chaotic, dangerous, and traumatic events during the adventure. maybe in a state of shock? maybe exhaustion? he may have been so emotionally numb he didn't even notice he was being hugged.
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i don't think rick ever had an issue hugging morty.
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vbluesss · 23 days ago
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on nagito komaeda and love
I just think it’s sort of funny that for a character whose (arguably) most well-recognized CG is this: 
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komaeda’s narrative so heavily centers love. and I don’t just say this because I’ve had komahina brainrot for years (though this is true!!). even if you don’t care about komahina, it’s tough to deny komaeda is a walking tragedy in large part because of the role that love plays in his life. his characterization is driven by the way his luck has denied him love, and how he seeks it out regardless. in that sense, I think that without understanding komahina as at least one-sided, you miss out on one of the juiciest, most miserable pieces of komaeda’s character development.
tldr; a love-centered reading of komaeda makes sense, recognizing komahina as “a thing” in DR2 (whether you ship it or not) is pretty important to understanding how komaeda operates, and I’ll try to prove it right here under this page break!!
Part 1: Komaeda’s Love Life (or, his life without love)
I think it’s safe to assume that if you clicked here, you know about komaeda’s absurdly miserable, tumultuous childhood, but I’ll do a quick recap just in case! meteor kills his parents on a plane, he inherits a ton of money. he’s kidnapped by a serial killer, he finds a winning lottery ticket in the garbage bag he’s thrown out in. he’s diagnosed with terminal cancer and dementia, he gets into hope’s peak.
in his free time events, komaeda *explicitly* frames his luck cycle as something that takes away the people he loves. it only “takes action” against him after his relatives have died (for the sake of this essay, let’s assume that komaeda loved his parents, or would have at least been hurt by their passing). by way of other close connections… well, his wording here implies that by the time of his diagnosis, he didn’t really have anybody in his life. 
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either komaeda didn’t allow himself to get close to anyone after the meteor incident, or he did, and they were taken away by his luck. at some point during his childhood, komaeda learned he should view himself as a death sentence.
so, how does this loss of love shape the komaeda we know? I’ll talk about this in terms of four of his defining (and connected!) traits in DR2 canon – the ones that really make his actions make sense: his self-loathing, his hope-seeking, his learned helplessness, and his certainty that his existence poses a threat to those around him. komaeda’s experience with loss makes him view himself as a source of death, which in turn fuels these tenets of his character. ultimately, his loss and the complexes that arise from it give him good incentive to push people away.
his self-loathing
komaeda hates himself. he views himself as worthless outside of his potential to serve as a “stepping stone” for the hope of the ultimates. he claims that this is driven by his beliefs around talent, which are in turn linked to the way his worldview rests on viewing hope as “absolute good.” the talentless (himself included) are only good for advancing the hope of the talented. still, his self-loathing is a bit more personal than that. take what he says and dig just below the surface, and it’s a clean cut trauma response all the way down. which leads us directly to…
his hope-seeking
komaeda is willing to do literally anything to serve hope. on the island, this (in short) means dying. this is where I prod at komaeda’s reasoning a bit more: komaeda’s willingness to act the way he does in canon also stems from his belief that his dying would be a net good for the world. his existence kills the people around him. his illness will kill him anyway. he has less than no value, and hope is invaluable. to go out for the sake of hope would give his wretched life purpose; it’s his dream come true.
and it’s no mystery why komaeda cares so much about hope: again, it’s a coping mechanism! komaeda’s belief that all bad luck is a necessary precursor for good luck and that hope will always triumph over despair is (as he himself says!) the only reason he’s managed to stay alive. I’ll say it again because I really can’t emphasize it enough – komaeda thinks that just by existing, he kills the people he loves. ouch!
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learned helplessness / his existence as a threat
komaeda has, essentially, learned to submit to his luck cycle. all bad luck is good luck in the end – isn’t that amazing?! almost paradoxically, he’s hyper-vigilant about the negative impact his luck has on those around him. this is a tricky one. I make sense of it this way: komaeda’s perception of how much his luck impacts the people close to him isn’t inflated, like, at all. the supernatural way the world bends around komaeda to screw him over really does pose a danger to himself and others, and he takes measures to minimize that danger. his stated acceptance of his luck cycle is… well, again, he’s coping. 
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if komaeda really thought that all bad luck is ultimately good luck, he wouldn’t try to protect his classmates from his bad luck. but, as we see in island mode, he does!
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but really, who could blame komaeda for lying to himself? I’ll restate the facts. komaeda thinks that luck is absolute power. he says that he’s powerless against it. his luck has taken his family, and it’s left him with nothing but money that he doesn’t want. he’s certain he’s a curse, and there’s no end to that in sight: so long as komaeda exists, he’ll keep on losing – murdering – everything he loves. 
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in the face of all of that despair, what can you do but abandon your self-esteem and pray for something good to come out of all of it? how else could somebody possibly survive carrying that burden, truly believing that load will never be lightened?
tldr; komaeda thinks his existence is a threat, and a big chunk of his personality is a frankensteined way of surviving the pain that comes with that. still, we should question how much of his worldview komaeda has really internalized without inner conflict. 
Part 2: Enter Hajime Hinata
we get some answers on that front when we see that despite the clear and obvious danger it poses, nagito komaeda still finds himself falling hard for hajime hinata. that’s really, really loud.
I’ll preface this part by saying that you don’t need to actively ship komahina to understand what I’m trying to get at here. this said, I’ll be recapping an argument you’ve almost definitely seen before: komahina is definitely “a thing” – at the very least as a one-sided thing. to this, I’ll add the (perhaps bold?) claim that without recognizing that much as true, you’re missing out on a big part of what makes komaeda so interesting.
komaeda’s FTEs make it abundantly clear that komaeda has feelings for hinata. apart from his famed failed love confession, the fact that komaeda is willing to allow hinata to get close enough to learn about his views on hope and luck is telling. 
(the smoking gun here hinges on trusting that komaeda was telling the truth during the time you spent with him; in so many words, that he only lied about lying. so, for the sake of argument, let’s assume this is true! there’s good proof for it, anyway.)
if you read his final FTE as komaeda flashing his soul to hinata and making a decision at the very last second to retreat, turning to old coping mechanisms to protect hinata from his luck, it’s sort of a komahina bombshell. that capitulation spells out for us that komaeda understands sharing his life experiences with hinata to be one of the most intimate things he could possibly do.
he recognizes the exact moment he lets hinata get too close – when his life story is finally told – and he does what he’s learned he needs to do to get them both out of that situation safely: he tries to make hinata hate him, and tells himself (and hinata!) that he did it for the sake of hope.
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(and yet, komaeda let hinata approach him every FTE, knowing damn well that they were both playing with fire… very interesting.)
now, let’s say you don’t consider the FTEs to be integral to canon. I mean, you can really easily miss out on all of komaeda’s content if you choose not to hang out with him in chapter 1! so, for the skeptic, in the unskippable main story, komaeda tells hinata this:
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komaeda cares about hinata despite everything. and I really, truly mean despite everything. at this point in the story, the fact that he still cares about hinata calls into question basically every single one of his core beliefs. he’s read his final dead room prize – not only does hinata not have a talent, we can presume that komaeda also knows hinata became ultimate despair along with the rest of them. 
hinata has continually sought out komaeda’s company, even though komaeda knows himself to be worthless at best, lethal at worst. komaeda was willing to let him get closer, even though he knows how dangerous that is for hinata. he can’t help but let hinata try to know him. 
isn’t he awful? to want what he knows he can’t have, even though that wanting has never done anything but cause pain? he’s really the lowest of the low, to love someone who destroyed the world, who makes him question the views that will allow him to do the only good thing he’s ever been able to do for it: to die for hope. 
and yet, it’s a nod to how incredibly capable of love komaeda is that he’s still willing to reach out for it, no matter how many times it’s burned him in the past, and how much it hurts him in the present to want it. he understands more than anyone that his feelings can only result in disaster. reading komaeda as someone who can’t help but go on loving anyway makes his story hurt so much worse. 
but, you miss a whole lot of that without an eye for komahina. seeing hinata as the eye of komaeda’s emotional hurricane (and keeping tabs on their connection accordingly) allows us to glimpse past the cracks in komaeda’s front. we see that komaeda’s worldview is less stable than he presents it as – hinata is where komaeda’s coping mechanisms, for better or worse, run up against a wall. that tends to be uncomfortable for a guy who’s just barely coping in the first place. then again, growth is supposed to be uncomfortable, isn’t it?
Part 3: The Future He Chooses
so, all of this considered, I think one of the most interesting ways you can flesh komaeda out post-canon is by asking how he’d find himself willing to accept love. whether that love is from hinata or the ultimates, whether it’s platonic or romantic, love is the thing that komaeda wants AND fears in equal measure more than anything. it’s the source of his self-loathing and his obsession with hope. it’s the reason he’s lived the way that he has for so long – lonely, and afraid of being anything but.
getting into a relationship wouldn’t solve komaeda’s problems for him, and that’s a good thing. it would force him to confront old ones, and probably create dozens of new issues for him, too. writing him through that makes for great character study!
hinata (or anyone else, for that matter) can’t love komaeda into loving himself, but he can give him a shoulder to cry on while he works through 22 years of fear and sorts through the wreckage of a worldview that’s long since stopped serving him. I don’t think his progress would be linear. but, I think that he could do it. komaeda learning to accept care is what his healing looks like. 
(well. and physically recovering from cancer and dementia. but that’s neither here nor there!)
a post-canon komaeda learning to love narrative is also in line with the themes of DR2. hinata leads the survivors out of the neo world program because he makes the decision to choose his own future, creating a new version of “hope” for himself and his classmates. likewise, komaeda can make the decision to save himself. that is, if he trusts himself enough to actually touch and hold the thing that he’s never been able to stop reaching out for, anyway.
after all, hinata is lucky too. (and if it turns out he isn’t… y'all like angst fics, right?)
(shoutout to @cynopter for looking this over and confirming that I'm not spouting nonsense <33 thank you for reading my thesis of the week <33)
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vbluesss · 27 days ago
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the selfie:
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selfie!
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vbluesss · 29 days ago
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Full hearts, Full charge.
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vbluesss · 1 month ago
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Spoilers for Summer of All Fears:
Something of note we see of post-matrix adult Morty is that he was basically Evil Morty with more extreme PTSD and a vendetta against mainly phone chargers.
He was smart enough to be able to correct Rick about the death race car:
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And was able to hide his true motives until Rick let his guard down:
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I mean, lbh, Rick had this coming from his Morty for a while, but what makes this sad was that it came from a 17 year older Morty who has been to prison and war, losing everyone he grew to love due to being unable to die. And this was all because he borrowed a f*cking phone charger!
He had so many justifications to go Evil Morty here. He looked just as bored and even the last thing he said to Rick before he left sounded like something Evil Morty would say:
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But what was pretty disturbing was that this wasn't enough to make Morty sick of Rick. He had the chance to use his newfound knowledge and skills to do anything to his grandpa, and all he did was stick him in his own matrix after kissing him goodbye:
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And then go off to take down a nuclear power plant. Morty went through sh!t, and it was basically turned into a joke by making him focus on dooming the country just to get rid of phones. That just frustrated me. It was a great episode for the most part, but because they were trying to make it funny, they didn't allow the tragic implications of it to be taken seriously:
Rick never truly regretted doing what he did to Morty and Summer. In fact, he was happy to be hanging out with post-matrix adult Morty despite seeing what it did to him.
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He didn't apologize, and he faced no true consequences for his original pettiness. Which I get is the basis of the show, but I truly believe Morty deserved to have a crash out at Rick or at least remember what happened so he could use that experience in the future or never forget what Rick put him through. He's already desensitized at a level of being a threat to Homeland Security, why no expand on it? He's literally killed, tortured, and ruined the lives of numerous people and aliens, why not have him become more like Evil Morty and stay like that? Let him really consider how Rick ruined his life and made him this way for no good reason?
The show can still be funny, but come on, let's have an actual story here! I'm not saying we need to make Morty into Evil Morty, but let Morty become what Rick is basically forcing him to become, it would make the series so much more interesting and have more potential for future seasons.
Also, they brought back the Wubba Lubba dub-dub thing, anyone think it might be foreshadowing?
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vbluesss · 1 month ago
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SEASON 8 LET'S GO
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