volatilebirch

[volatilebirch]

This is why I deleted snapchat: yall do not need access to me at all hours like this, I don't like it.

i ADORE the anomitinity of tumblr. when i post stupid ass shit from my mush brain on like snapchat or whatever i gotta deal with messages like “are you okay?” and “what does this even mean”. here i can just post 30 pictures of dinosaurs in a row and my followers will be like YEEEEEAAAA BABBY

[volatilebirch]

Thorn liberty spikes on Venus

[volatilebirch]

Venus! She will always have a spot in my heart… love plant creatures

[volatilebirch]

Feel free to print and distribute this image

[volatilebirch]

I'm so tired. I'm so tired.

I just want to sleep forever. I'm so tired. Everything is struggle and pain and effort, I just want it to be easy.

Why can't anything be easy? Why is everything so goddamn hard? My body is fucking breaking all around me while my mind collapses in on itself, yet I'm expected to function:

Sometimes I just want to sleep. Often I can't sleep. My skin wakes me up: pinpricks of fire as I roll over.

I'm cursed, and I hate it. I hate the self-pity: I hate it. I want to be angry again but I know my anger is what kills me. It feels so weakening to douse my fire but I have to or I'll burn out. Why does it have to be so fucking hard?

[volatilebirch]

Loneliness

Its the kind of rotting ache that doesn't go away

That festers beneath and bubbles, barely contained beneath bruised skin.

You've already wasted half my life, you've already stolen all my moments:

Why do you have to steal my mind?

My heart is in a cage, and I can't let it out. It forgot how to fly.

[volatilebirch]

being anti ai is making me feel like in going insane. "you asked for thoughts about your characters backstory and i put it into chat gpt for ideas". studies have proven its making people dumber. "i asked ai to generate this meal plan". its causing water shortages where its data centers are built. "ill generate some pictures for the dnd campaign". its spreading misinformation. "meta, generate an image of this guy doing something stupid". its trained off stolen images, writing, video, audio. "i was talking with my snapchat ai-" theres no way to verify what its doing with the information it collects. "youtube is impletmenting ai based age verification". my work has an entire graphics media department and has still put ai generated motivational posters up everywhere. ai playlists. ai facial verification. google ai microsoft ai meta ai snapchat ai. everyone treats it as a novelty. every treats it as a mandatory part of life. am i the only one who sees it? am i paranoid? am i going insane? jesus fucking christ. if i have to hear one more "well at least-" "but it does-" "but you can-" im about to lose it. i shouldnt have to jump through hoops to avoid the evil machine. have you no principles? no goddamn spine? am i the weird one here?

[volatilebirch]

Oil on acrylic pad paintings by nickbleb

[volatilebirch]

what's that one thing where they asked how ripely from alien was so realistic and believable as a female character in scifi for once and they were like "well we just took the dude from the original script and made him a girl and changed nothing else. it works bc men and women are the same?" and people were like "woah no way" and then didn't learn anything from that for 20 years

[volatilebirch]

Gods in Eden

[volatilebirch]

“ok lets do warm up sketch”

“oh..”

[volatilebirch]

Dude I spent my entire childhood hanging out with Indian people. At picnics we had hot dogs AND samosas. We don't have to be evil assholes just because we have european descent. I can't imagine why its so hard for racists to understand that if you're nice to other people, they'll usually be nice to you, and willing to SHARE their culture with you. Why do they always have to steal? Why is theft more comfortable to them? What are they so afraid of?

Its so strange to me. I struggle to understand white supremacists. Maybe because they gave up any semblance of culture to join "whiteness" in North America, they are jealous of culture. They want it all for themselves. They don't understand that people are willing to share. People are kind. People are good. Why can't they see that? Why, when they see dark skin, they see a monster and not a person?

It baffles me. They claim to want that simple and good life but its not true. What they really want is to not have to share it with people they detest. That is horrifying.

“This is what they took from you” and it’s a blonde family cooking barbecue in the suburbs? Brother you are racist and fascist over hot dogs? You know you can still do that. Also if you befriend other ethnicities, they will bring cool other food to the potluck. Stupid ass

[volatilebirch]

I understand and relate to Rumi a lot, feeling like she has to hide herself, feeling like there's a monster hiding under her skin, waiting to reveal itself.

"A monster with no feelings don't deserve to live, its so obvious."

I felt that way once.

Full demon rumi ;3

[volatilebirch]

Pelagic fauna

Only #4 left! DM if interested

ALL OTHER DESIGNS ARE CLAIMED

[volatilebirch]

taste

i bite and clash my teeth onto thick leather. the suitcase is brittle and filled to the top with papers filled with science. i chomp and taste. seems like nothing to me.

i sucked on the paper, trying to coax my tongue with the ink. it does not. the letters stay damp on the page, blurry from my dehydrated spit. it does nothing to me.

i spun the baggage around looking for pens or pencil to ease my anxious jaw, clenching at every texture. i feel with my buds but find no taste.

i feel nothing.

[volatilebirch]

“I am afraid of eternity too” 🥀

[volatilebirch]