watcher-in-the-dark · 10 years
100 Warhammer 40k Commandments
1.Thou shalt not refer to the Adeptus Soritas as "Bolter Biatches" nor shalt thou go anywhere near our sisters during the time of the "Red Rage," lest thou wishes to be the first human to enter orbit without the aid of a shuttle.
2. Orks are not "cute."
3. Thou shalt not make jokes about the Imperial Guard's weapons.
4. Thou shalt not replace the Librarian's staff with a magic wand.
5. Thou shalt not tip the Terminators over during battle.
6. Thou shalt not do Spock impersonations around Eldar.
7. C-3P0 is not a Necron ambassador.
8. You shall not dare others to eat Squigs.
9. No, you cannot "take the Titan for a spin."
10. Thou shalt not use thy multi-meltas to light campfires. (in a similar manner, thou shalt not use the Terminator Captain's chainfist to open tins of baked beans)
11. Thou shalt not bribe the Inquisitor to bring down Exterminatus on your ex-wife.
12. Thou shalt not refer to the Rhino transports as "pimp wagons," nor shalt thou use the phrase, "If the Rhino be rockin, don't come a knockin."
13. The Chapter Master is not a "drag."
14. Thou shall not use Power Swords to cut your food.
15. Thou shall not ask a Sister if you might "donate some of your own Gene-Seed."
16. Thou shall not throw soap at nurglings.
17. Thou shalt not put a "kick me" sign on the Golden Throne.
18. Thou shalt not refer to the Machine Spirit as "Cruise Control".
19. Thou shalt not stick a 'Honk if you think I'm sexy' sticker on the Sisters' Rhino.
20. Thou shalt not honk if thy sees a sticker saying 'Honk if you think I'm sexy' on a Sister's Rhino.
21. Thou shalt not unplug the Golden Throne just "for laughs".
22. Thou shalt not make the Emperor read your palms, or call upon him as "Miss Cleo".
23. Thou shall not play "tiggy" in the minefield.
24. Shooting one of your own men who looks at you funny, does not count as an “enemy casualty”.
25. Thou shalt not clog the Lasscannon tubes “just to see what happens”.
26. Thou shalt not spread cooking oil in front of a dreadnought.
27. Thou shalt not attempt to shake the chaplain’s hand whilst wearing a powerfist.
28. Putting sand inside the terminators’ armour is not “funny”.
29. Thou shalt not refer to the standard of fortitude as a “walking stick”
30. Thou shalt not refer to the Las-pistol as a novelty cigarette lighter.
31. The earthshaker cannon is not a “hat stand” nor is the sentinel a “standard lamp”.
32. Thou shalt not use Land Raiders to "play chicken" with Imperial Guard Chimeras.
33. Thou shalt not put a "Purge me!" sign on the back of the chaplain’s armour.
34. Thou shalt not compliment the dark eldar by calling them "kinky"
35. Thou shalt not let an Ork be the designated driver
36. Thou shalt not replace the holy ungents for the machine spirit with grain alcohol
37. Thou shalt not invite a Banshee to Karaoke
38. Thou shalt not replace the O2 units on the commander’s power armour with laughing gas
39. Thou shalt not train a hormogaunt to be a watchdog
40. Thou shalt not take "old one eye" out of context...”He's in my artificer armour he.he.duh!”
41. Thou shalt not call Dark Angels "hippie alter boys"
42. Thou shalt not taunt an eldar "gee didn't these use to shoot further?"
43. Thou shalt not refer to the golden throne as "the nicest commode in the galaxy"
44. Thou shalt not attempt to offer a Carnifex a breath mint.
45. Thou shalt not throw a warp beast a dog biscuit.
46. Thou shalt not hope for mud wrestling during a witch/ sisters battle.
47. Thou shalt not ask a warlock what he wears under his robe.
48. Thou shalt not tease an inquisitor with "look sir-heretics!"
49. Thou shalt not play wack-a-mole with those little jawa-wannabe dark angel thingies.
50. Thou shalt not wear oven mitts when issued a plasma gun.
51. Thou shalt not take the rhino to procure monkish ale before filling out His Most Holy acquisitions forms.
52. Thou shalt not ask the librarian if he has records concerning Uranus.
53. Thou shalt not refer to the flamer as a “novelty toaster”
54. Thou shalt not ask the apothecary to guess what you have eaten by looking at your tongue.
55. Thou shalt not remove the motors from a terminators' suit during battle.
56. Thou shalt not point and laugh saying 'look somebody missed the toilet when battling snotlings.
57. Thou shalt not break wind in the presence of the emperor (unless properly addressed to do so)
58. Eldar helmets may not be use as hole-punches.
59. Thou shalt not refer to the daily rituals as “psychological warfare” nor shalt thou refer to the index astartes as “the book of grudges”
60. Thou shalt not say, "will someone please tell the emperor to crap or get off the throne”
61. Thou shalt not petition His Most Holy administration to make "Inquisition" an Olympic sport.
62. Thou shalt not instigate a "my Primarch could beat up your primarch" debate.
63. Thou shalt not use heavy breathing and "I am your father" as a battlecry when wielding a powersword and entering an assault
64. Thou shalt not affect a Transylvanian accent around the Blood Angels.
65. No hair pulling when enjoying brotherly contests with the space wolves.
66. Duct-taping a flamer to your boltgun does not count as a combi-weapon, and painting it pretty won't make it "master crafted"
67. Thou shalt not punt grots for pleasure.
68. Thou shalt not shout “thongs for the thong god" in front of the Dark Eldar lest thou wishes to learn the true meaning of pain.
69. Thou shalt not debate the protective merits of purple spandex with the Dark Eldar.
70. Thou shalt not write theatre criticism and charge His Most Holy treasury to mail it to the harlequin.
71. Power armour never makes a sister look fat.
72. Thou shalt not laugh manically when flaming the non-believers.
73. Thou shalt not use thunderhammers to play crocket.
74. Thou shalt not start rounds of "you might be a c'tan if" while imbibing strong monkish ale.
75. Though shalt not refer to thine brethern, whom the Emperor has dictated be armed with an incendiary weapon, as a "Flamer" constantly. For this has been proven to lower morale and cause strife within his His Most Holy showering facilities.
76. Thou shalt not affect an Austrian accent around the Necrons.
77. Thou shalt not ask roughriders if you can pet their ponies.
78. Thou shalt not stray from the adeptus mechanicus's directive towards ornamentation of rhinos-specifically no aluminium sport rims, neon, extraneous exhaust pipes, or fuzzy dice.
79. Thou shall not attempt to challenge the Eldar to games of 'Counterstrike'.
80. Thou shall not, in any way, shape, or form, take the land speeder joy riding.
81. Remember, shining lasguns in the guards’ eyes is WRONG.
82. Thou shall not pretend to have been possessed by a daemon.
83. Thou shall not call the sacred plasma gunners of the imperial guard 'fizzbusters'.
84. Yes, it will be noticed if you 'borrow' the chapter master's equipment.
85. Thou shall not use supported warhounds to 'play ball' with imperial guard sentinels.
86. It is NOT cool to feed snotlings copious amounts of narcotics!
87. It is not “funny” to dress up as a bloodletter and jump out in front of the chapter master.
88. Replacing a brother's ammunition with blanks is not “funny”
89. Wiffle bats are not approved hand weapons.
90. Playing naughty movies in your power armour’s autosenses is not sanctioned by the Adeptus Astartes.
91. Thou shalt not teleport into the Sisters showering facilities.
92. Thou shalt not taunt our revered dreadnaught brethren by tapping on their window and saying "anyone in there?"
93. Thou shalt not commandeer drop pods to go for pizza.
94. Thou shalt not refer to the emperor’s champion as "that brown-noser"
95. Nuking from orbit is not doctrinally feasible for removal of annoying insects-unless they be tyranids.
96. Thou shalt not tickle the fallen to press for confession and redemption.
97. Thou shalt not follow a Librarian around thinking "Can you hear me now", repetively in an attempt to drive him insane.
98. Thou shalt not refer to the Wulfen as "damn dirty apes".
99. Thou shalt not use Whirlwinds to put on fireworks displays.
100. Thou shalt not ask the Dark Angels if they "can keep a secret"
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watcher-in-the-dark · 11 years
Two of my favourite franchises melded into one. Marvellous.
Amazing models too.
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Warhammer 40K Avengers
From Merlyn’s Forums (Feb 18th 2013):
Yesterday during our monthly 40k tournament, Captain America made an appearance in the forces of the Emperor. Together with Thor, Wolverine, Iron Man, Warmachine, and a whole mess of other superheroes, the Avengers joined in battle on the side of Terra!
Independent of their successes on the battlefield, the Avengers and their display board won the best painted category in a landslide victory. We can rest easy knowing that due to the efforts of the Space Marines, the Helicarrier is safe for one more day.
As always, we at Merlyn’s are more than happy to see whatever unique army choices and paint schemes you can come up with
Be sure to bring down the best painted army yourself next time. As always, keep an eye out for Steven’s posts for the details of our upcoming events!
These are simply incredible!
I came across one of these pictures without a source on tumblr, and simply had to track them down because they are such wonderful conversions.
By now you all will be away of how much I love geeky mashups and crossovers, especially when they are pulled off with as much style and skill as these beauties.
They all look incredible and simply knowing that these exist has made the world all the more bright and filled me with epic amounts geeky joy!
If anyone has any conversions or models or anything they would like to share and show off, please do not hesitate to get in contact with us.
- Darth Sebious
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watcher-in-the-dark · 11 years
The infamous words that derailed many a D&D campaign...
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watcher-in-the-dark · 11 years
Space Wolves straight out of the gate. I'm sold.
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by MMODAQ - The MMO Currency Exchange »
Warhammer 40,000: Eternal Crusade Phase 2 is launched. Visit the website to see the playable factions and the Space Marine Chapters.
Eternal Crusaders:
Space Marines
Chaos Space Marines
Space Marine Chapters:
Blood Angels
Space Wolves
Dark Angels
Source and images: Warhammer 40K: Eternal Crusade
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watcher-in-the-dark · 11 years
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Behold the Rubric Marines of the Thousand Sons as they march into battle.
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watcher-in-the-dark · 11 years
Last of the cabal.
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This one probably came out the worst of the five. Might have to redo some of his paintwork.
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watcher-in-the-dark · 11 years
Now the Heavy Weapon.
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watcher-in-the-dark · 11 years
And the second of the cabal.
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This one didn't turn out quite as I wanted.
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watcher-in-the-dark · 11 years
First of the Rubric Terminators.
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watcher-in-the-dark · 11 years
Aspiring Champion of my Thousand Sons Terminators.
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Rest of his cabal to follow.
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watcher-in-the-dark · 11 years
Magnificent artwork.
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watcher-in-the-dark · 11 years
In the grim darkness of the future, there is only war.
Interview with the studio head Miguel Caron of Eternal Crusade developers via Natfka.blogspot AKA Faeit212.
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watcher-in-the-dark · 11 years
God Emperor protect us.
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Leaked Khorne Bloodknight via TheShellCase
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watcher-in-the-dark · 11 years
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New stuff for the Tau. From:
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watcher-in-the-dark · 11 years
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watcher-in-the-dark · 11 years
Reblog and add your favourite Warhammer 40k quote! Let’s make it huge
“No Fear! No Pity! NO REMORSE!” - Wacry of the Black Templars (via wh40khq)
"I am the hammer, I am the right hand of the Emperor, the instrument of His will, the gauntlet about His fist, the tip of His spear, the edge of His sword!" - Warcry of the Grey Knights
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watcher-in-the-dark · 11 years
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Thousand Sons Sorcerer Lord. Force Staff and Combi-Bolter.
Another model that worked out just as I wanted it to.
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