waveredinagoldenmist - Tumblr blog

[waveredinagoldenmist]

Excuse me standing on one leg I’m half-caste. Explain yuself wha yu mean when yu say half-caste yu mean when a painter mix red an green is a half-caste canvas? explain yuself wha yu mean when yu say half-caste yu mean when light an shadow mix in de sky is a half-caste weather? well in dat case imde weather nearly always half-caste in fact some o dem cloud half-caste till dem overcast so spiteful dem don’t want de sun pass ah rass? explain yuself wha yu mean when yu say half-caste yu mean a musician sit down at dah piano an mix a black key wid a white key is a half-caste symphony? Explain yuself wha yu mean Ah listening to yu wid de keen half of mih ear Ah looking at yu wid de keen half of mih eye an when I’m introduced to yu I’m sure you’ll understand why I offer yu half-a-hand an when I sleep at night I close half-a-eye consequently when I dream I dream half-a-dream an when moon begin to glow I half-caste human being cast half-a-shadow but yu must come back tomorrow wid de whole of yu eye an de whole of yu ear an de whole of yu mind. an I will tell yu de other half of my story.

Source (via vivagoldstar)

Dear fuck this is good.

[waveredinagoldenmist]

Okay, so there are *two* absolute sweethearts on the internet, and they're both here.

Are you sure Taz and Ves are going to be successful? At least one of them is related to you, which doesn't bode well.

They’re both related to me…?

Anyway, no, I’m not sure they’re going to be successful. Taz could get hit by a bus and suffer extreme brain damage. Ves could turn out to be schizophrenic when she hits four. It’s always possible for some unexpected thing to happen and wreck all your plans, no matter how careful you are about planning.

I just know that they’re both doing really well in school right now, and that Taz is on track to start his apprenticeship as an electrician before the end of this year. Ves is conversational in Anitami and is starting to be able to understand sentences in the Tapai cartoons she watches sometimes, and now that she’s gotten the hang of reading, she’s getting pretty good at that, too. So I think that if they maintain the trajectory they’re on now, they will probably be pretty successful.

It doesn’t make a lot of sense to me to say that a child is always going to turn out like their parents, when we know that lots of children become totally different things. Obviously ancestry is important, but it’s never going to be a perfect indicator of how things will work out for a person.

Anyway, even if they do get hit by a bus and have to live with me forever, I think they’ll still be able to be successful at some things, even if the overall pattern of their life isn’t something that others might label “a success”. I think no matter what, they’ll still have made some valuable contributions to the world, even if they’re small contributions that are only valuable to a few people. But that’s still important, you know? I don’t think we could get by if everyone’s small contributions to the world disappeared.

I guess I think the important thing is to do the best you can with what you have, and I definitely think that the two of them are doing that.

[waveredinagoldenmist]

Coughdisconnectedfromrealitycough.

pfft I got an email warning me about the existence of my own blog. That’s a new one. Do most people not have Scoop Alerts set up for their name, so they’d know immediately when they’re mentioned online?

[waveredinagoldenmist]

((Goodness that's meta.))

I FOUND IT

I FUCKING FOUND IT AHAHAHAHA

So you know the bug that occasionally flips glyphs in most languages’ rendering of the name of a certain empire that once conquered most of the continent and nowadays styles itself “Free State”?  It affects like four other words too but not common ones, mostly it’s the place name described.  In most phonetic languages it just reverses the last two characters whatever they are.  (You won’t know what I’m talking about if you read a character-based language.)

Well, it’s a translation software bug.  It’s in all the major providers; we’re mostly not competing on spelling but on context-sensitivity and availability of expansions when we update with neologisms and stuff like that.  No one on the internet can spell anyway, right.  So the little ones which didn’t have this problem weren’t making any headway just for not carelessly consistently misspelling the translations of the largest single polity that has ever existed on Amenta.

But I FOUND it.  It was attached to the calendar system - most calendar systems on computers route around having to count seconds since the first day of year 0 for modern contexts (big numbers slow down calculations ever so slightly) and instead count from the beginning of the reign of the Emperor and for technical reasons I won’t try to summarize language software tends to use that as a reference to determine what character set a user is employing until they manually set it otherwise but there’s an improperly applied numerical function that gets done to that string and then suddenly the backdrop of Imperial Warriors (Now With Even More Collectible Toy Sets) is spelled wrong.

So I fixed that.

You should see the problem disappear if and only if you PURCHASE YOUR RECOMMENDED UPDATES instead of patching your software with third party meme translation packs.

…so, never, I guess.

OAHK.

[waveredinagoldenmist]

I'm male and would totally bounce you off a headboard and then do something that was an appropriate intersection of both of our kinks and interests, after having formally obtained consent first. And fuck you like a bitch.

would you or would you not fuck: in-a-narrow-land, artisanalclusterfuck, waveredinagoldenmist, megasilverfist (only three of these are real questions, the last one is a given)

@in-a-narrow-land

I’d fuck them / I wouldn’t fuck them / I’d have their babies if they paid for the credit / I’d have their babies and I’ll pay for the credit / literally who / i’d fuck them for money

i don’t usually have sex with women unless enough money changes hands.  greens aren’t normally my type either and whenever we talk it’s always a vicious argument.  but maybe if she wanted to take her frustrations out on me i could be persuaded

@artisanalclusterfuck

i already answered this one, more or less

@waveredinagoldenmist

I’d fuck them / I wouldn’t fuck them / I’d have their babies if they paid for the credit / I’d have their babies and I’ll pay for the credit / literally who / i’d fuck them for money

i don’t know if they’re male or female, but judging by a smattering of their posts if the former i wouldn’t mind them vigorously bouncing me off the headboard

@megasilverfist

I’d fuck him / I wouldn’t fuck them / I’d have their babies if they paid for the credit / I’d have their babies and I’ll pay for the credit / literally who / i’d let him do everything to me

i don’t know if he likes men but i sure as hell like him.  it is among my fondest regrets that due to the hemispheres dividing us, and due to me being a nobody and him being a famous fightsgray, it’s fabulously unlikely that we’ll ever spring at the same time in the same place.  you can bet now that it’s spring i beat off to that time he took me out to a bar and explained the secret history of his legendary ancestors

[waveredinagoldenmist]

I mostly do, like, dinner dates and shit, so I haven't seen more of a boost than the one I get in spring (which is kind of tedious when I'm not spring-level horny), but hot *damn* have all my clients been ready and waiting right out of the gate.

I have been

so

busy today.

Good gracious I’m exhausted.

The chafing is real.

Whew.  I was thinking unexpected financial windfall what with no one’s favored video entertainment working so I was trying to grab that opportunity while I could, but if this continues significantly more judicious pacing would be prudent.

[waveredinagoldenmist]

Fuck.

[waveredinagoldenmist]

I haven't read any of your reblogs of my posts because they're all really long and poorly written and mostly the word "fuck", but I'm concerned about the volume and frequency. Have you ever met another person? Some of them are pretty neat. I really recommend it. You have to go outside but it's totally worth it.

I have reblogged, like, two of your posts in the past several fucking months. One of those reblogs was three lines long. I’m a sex worker who does ‘accompany this person to formal events, be excruciatingly polite, pretend to have no opinions’ a lot. Talking to people and going outside are my fucking job (alongside 'talking to people’ and 'going outside’).

Gosh, you don’t actually read my posts, I might feel a little offended at that.

Cow bitch.

[waveredinagoldenmist]

Go fuck yourself.

Not with a carving knife, mind- I've been warned against that particular phrasing- but a coatholder or cactus would fucking suffice, I think.

You're a waste of a fucking credit- can't be bothered to do anything meaningful, so instead you rub together your greedy little grasping claws and open up your avaricious gaping razor maw and let it all roll in. The blood, sweat, and tears of other people have you panting like a bitch in heat- their lost and unborn children are your dearest treat- the rewards of their daily oblations are to you a gluttonous salvation- that is to say that you crave nothing more or less than *money*.

You don't do a fucking thing to earn it, but every day it pours in, so you spend it, like the fucker you are- not on anything consecrated, good, or just, but to satisfy your status lust, of fucking course. And you have the fucking *audacity* to criticize someone who actually fucking works for a living! You're that fucking much of a fucking bitch!

You find someone who's fucking sweet, and decent, and kind, and kind of overly so when it comes to reds (or r*ds, or r_ds, or whatever the trendy thing is, I don't give a fuck anymore)- and suddenly they're an unfit guardian. Them! Says she who gleefully sends messages, worded like the story Scarlet Smut had a rape baby with Maroon Maruader, to random people on the internet! Who is fucking stupid enough to think that reds can't read- what the literal fuck is up with that one, anyways, have you considered seeing a therapist, I hear that they're very good at pity fucks and maybe if you get enough of your sapient-cattle-mucous on their shirt they might consider having sex with you and the sheer shock of the experience (having never been felt before) will cure your brain hemorrhage.

But you know fucking what? Since you're not a smart enough breed of magically intelligent cow to figure it out yourself.

The 'writer of horrifying trash apologia' is always going to be better than you.

Why?

Because nobody is ever going to love you.

They might pretend, out of fear that you might piss yourself all over their couch in dissapointment otherwise- they might actually be desperate enough that putting up with your fucking shit sounds like it's better than being alone-

But nobody is ever going to love a stone cold bitch of a sapient-cattle-woman like you.

No one.

The children have no families. That's why she has them.

Their mother was executed (for pollution violations!!! anyone noticing a trend here?) but I seriously doubt that none of their grandparents, great-grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, etc. could take some children in, and if the problem is that they need financial support I’d be happy to provide financial support, kids just should not be in an isolated situation with no one checking in on them with someone with a family history of pollution violations so bad they get you executed in Voa writing horrifying trash apologia.

[waveredinagoldenmist]

I'm male and would totally bounce you off a headboard.

would you or would you not fuck: in-a-narrow-land, artisanalclusterfuck, waveredinagoldenmist, megasilverfist (only three of these are real questions, the last one is a given)

@in-a-narrow-land

I’d fuck them / I wouldn’t fuck them / I’d have their babies if they paid for the credit / I’d have their babies and I’ll pay for the credit / literally who / i’d fuck them for money

i don’t usually have sex with women unless enough money changes hands.  greens aren’t normally my type either and whenever we talk it’s always a vicious argument.  but maybe if she wanted to take her frustrations out on me i could be persuaded

@artisanalclusterfuck

i already answered this one, more or less

@waveredinagoldenmist

I’d fuck them / I wouldn’t fuck them / I’d have their babies if they paid for the credit / I’d have their babies and I’ll pay for the credit / literally who / i’d fuck them for money

i don’t know if they’re male or female, but judging by a smattering of their posts if the former i wouldn’t mind them vigorously bouncing me off the headboard

@megasilverfist

I’d fuck him / I wouldn’t fuck them / I’d have their babies if they paid for the credit / I’d have their babies and I’ll pay for the credit / literally who / i’d let him do everything to me

i don’t know if he likes men but i sure as hell like him.  it is among my fondest regrets that due to the hemispheres dividing us, and due to me being a nobody and him being a famous fightsgray, it’s fabulously unlikely that we’ll ever spring at the same time in the same place.  you can bet now that it’s spring i beat off to that time he took me out to a bar and explained the secret history of his legendary ancestors

[waveredinagoldenmist]

Okay so I despise you and everything you stand for but fuck me that was fucking great.

On the other hand: I saw an emotionless, angry cow of a blogger on here today too!

Their name was 'you'.

cows don't have internet

that can’t be, I saw a blogger on here who said they were a cow, and had feelings, and were angry about our tendency to kill them, and no one lies on the internet

[waveredinagoldenmist]

I can confirm on the properties of severed dicks, I researched them a whole fuck of a lot after Blowjob Haggler came along.

have you considered severing the dicks of your enemies, loading them into a rocket and sending them to one of your space cunts

i mean, sure, but severed dicks don’t exactly keep their fun properties post-severing. plus i’d probably have to freeze em and that shit’s expensive

[waveredinagoldenmist]

people started sending me messages about how all the reds were going to be dead before i even SAID anything about pollution or reds or anything, why do people do that, it's so stupid and awful and pointless

A G R E E 

if people don’t want to think about POLLUTION AND RIOTS AND MASS MURDER AND GENOCIDE just let them not think about it! for fuck’s sake! it’s not like we can do anything about it!

[waveredinagoldenmist]

Yeah there's no fucking way this is going to turn out the way the fucking government wants it to.

The government of Evalee has issued an emergency stop order on all food deliveries to domestic red districts.  Food allowances will be offered to reds at workplaces to take with them after the conclusion of their workdays.  If you interface with reds contact the Department of Emergency to register for food allowances (you will be able to deduct the cost from the reds’ pay).

[waveredinagoldenmist]

Reds, reds, everywhere you look,

You can find them in a little nook,

Reading some sort of academic book,

Or complimenting strangers,

-such insidious dangers-

Reds, reds, everywhere you look,

Obviously not if you'd look up,

From your shit- what the fucking fuck,

Is up with this rash of crap,

-convincing these stupid saps-

That there's, everywhere you look,

Reds, reds in every internet nook.

Imrainai nor Industrial Bruise,

Is a red- now fuck off, dudes,

-or Tidal will send her goons-

[waveredinagoldenmist]

Might as fucking well.

New ask meme: what caste would I be accused of secretly being?

[waveredinagoldenmist]

The O.P, most of those insults wouldn't really make sense directed at you? You have a wonderful fiancé and I think you should get bitten in the crotch by an angry raccoon if and only if you want to.

Secret Greys (important warning!)

[IC this post is from a blog that has lots of posts about different TV shows. They say they’re from Voa and 4 years old, but don’t share any other identifying information]

These troll posts about secret oranges are going to make people not take secret castes seriously. For anyone who doesn’t know, there are secret r_ds who spread pollution, and secret greys who gather information for cops. There are already good lists of secret r_ds, so here’s one of secret greys. Be careful what you tell these people.

@tidalwave-shiningsky Real blues know how to not sound so condescending to people when they talk, because real blues are taught how to interact with people.

@imrainai blogged about wanting to shoot a polar bear. How more caste of the body can you get? Only a grey would think that was a normal thing to do.

@limmuda is obviously trying too hard to sound like an academic.

@jewelsfromthesky can’t really be green, they’re obviously too stupid for that. How stupid? Grey stupid.

@nationaltree only greys are that aggressive, purples are far more polite. It’s the customer service training.

@voiceofthemountains no one actually hates greys that much, it’s a bad attempt at faking it.

@megasilverfist his URL says SILVER he’s barely even trying to hide it