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your edible is never going to kick in because you're a bad person

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they should’ve never let me learn how to rom hack

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Sibling asked how ppl in star wars dance to jizz music and I had to give her an example

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dude stop trying to garner context and character traits from the objects in my room i know youre doing it. stop clicking on shit im not gonna tell you about - oh that picture is of me and my dad. yeah he's not really in my life anymore i just keep it around cause im sentimental- DUDE

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they call me the information withholder for reasons i won't get into

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How Marvel thinks teens talk: Oh crud, this is sooooo not #woke

How teens actually talk: Gun to your head would you rather fuck Piccolo or Vegeta

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in recent events of that zoo losing the clouded leopard, it reminded me of the time i went to a large petting zoo and there was a free roaming little black sheep. cutest little guy i ever saw, soi went to the zookeeper nearby and said ‘i think its really cute how you have a sheep thats allowed to just walk around. ‘ then the zookeepers eyes widened and he grabbed his walky talky and ran 

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Inflation is so bad I bet $20 isn't even enough to turn a straight man gay anymore that's gotta be like at least $40 in today's economy

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As a continuation of my “let Dipper say Fuck” and “let Stan say Bitch” agenda, I don’t think Bill should be allowed to swear. I think he should be perfectly aware of the concept and vocabulary of swear words but he’s just physically incapable of swearing due to being stuck in a kid’s show. And he’s really, really, really mad about that.

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Just discovered the queue, this thing is amazing

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everytime i get dysphoria over my height, im quickly reminded of how freaking tall fromsoft women are, which instantly cures my ailment