writertitan

[writertitan]

I know you’re probably busy but will you write another fic after perennial ? love your levi a lot🫦

All I’m gonna say is ya girl went through it and my writing will be a reflection of that

[writertitan]

do you think you’ll ever write for other fandoms? or do you already?

Hehehe, I would like to eventually sink my teeth into other fandom characters

[writertitan]

Unfortunately, I got my first blind box today and now I need about 200 more

[writertitan]

Perennial // Part 7

a/n: we're blasting through!

pairing: levi x fem!reader

overall themes: fantasy AU, strangers to lovers, traveling through realms, explicit content

part 5 themes: **NSFW** AND 18+ ONLY!! sexually explicit content!!! also angst and mentions of death.

read part 6 here

I love you.

Levi’s confession rang in your ears and made your heart flutter. You leaned in to capture his lips in yours, pouring every ounce of your own emotions into the kiss until it left the both of you breathless. Words could never describe what you’d come to feel for Levi, but the best you could do was reciprocate.

“I love you, Levi,” you mumbled into his mouth, cradling his face delicately.

You loved him. So simple, too simple, but enough to let him know you were right there with him. Hopelessly in love, fate or destiny be damned. You chose him and he chose you. It didn’t matter that it led back to the same path you’d apparently been on for quite some time.

Levi pulled you closer to him, making you squirm a bit in his lap, and that ignited a spark in you.

“I love you,” you whispered again. You pulled your lips away from his completely, earning you a noise of disapproval from him, but you merely smiled. “Let me show you how much.”

But, as you were lifting yourself off of his lap to undo his pants, Levi stopped you, gently moving you onto the sofa.

You looked at him in confusion, your eyes following his movements as he brought you to a seated position on the sofa and knelt before you, his eyes flickering between yours and your thighs that were squeezed together. Gently, he pried them apart, lifting up your skirts to reveal your soaked panties.

“Levi,” you whimpered, but he shut you up by kissing his way up your inner thigh until he was nuzzled into the wet fabric of your panties, his mouth parting just enough to give an open-mouthed kiss to the dampest spot. You arched your back, a surprised moan leaving your throat, and he made sure to pin your hips to the sofa before going in again, this time sucking you through the already soaked fabric.

You wanted to rip your underwear off, but also loved the sensation it gave you. The barrier of fabric between you and Levi’s mouth was inconvenient but also strangely erotic. He was using it against you, as a way to rile you up, but also as a way to turn you on.

His tongue pressed flat against you through your panties, nudging at your clothed clit, then your entrance, the fabric barely entering you when his tongue gently prodded into your hole. You could feel yourself getting wetter with anticipation, legs spreading wider, and your trembling hands hiked your skirts up higher so you could get a good view.

You almost came at the sight of him alone. There he was, kneeling in front of you, face between your legs, and his eyes darted up to yours to give you a hungry look.

“Please,” you whispered shakily, trying to wriggle your hips in his iron grip. You need to feel him, really feel him.

Thankfully, he listened.

With slow hands, he peeled off your panties completely, tossing them aside carelessly as he dove back in. But he decided to tease you again, his lips finding your inner thighs, always inches away from where you needed him most.

You were rigid with anticipation, breathing heavily as you tried to guide his mouth to your cunt with your hips, but his hands were back to pinning you to the sofa.

“Spread yourself with your hand,” he said suddenly, his gaze searing into you. “I want a good view.”

Part of you felt extremely shy, face aflame at the thought of Levi seeing you so exposed. The other part, however, wanted for him to see the entirety of you. The urge to give yourself completely to him overwhelmed you. Your hand flew down between your legs, spreading your lips apart as you were told to do, and you drank in the sight of Levi taking in every detail with that same hungry gaze.

It was all driving you insane. Even the gentle touches of your own fingers were making you writhe, and Levi could tell.

“Touch your clit,” he whispered, and you saw his eyes get a little brighter when you immediately followed direction, wanting that relief.

You slumped against the sofa, body getting looser now that you were getting some attention. Your middle finger rubbed your clit in light circles, and you watched Levi’s every reaction.

Suddenly, he jerked you forward a little bit, your ass barely on the sofa, and he dove in so his tongue could press into your dripping hole.

Your jaw dropped but no sound came out, the pleasure electrifying you, and your hips jerked in surprise. The hard suck he gave you made your legs quiver, and your finger stopped working at your clit for a moment, overwhelmed by pleasure.

Levi pulled away, which nearly made you cry, but it was only to move your hand away so he could replace it with his mouth. With his lips and tongue finally on you, your entire body sank into the sofa, head tilting back despite how badly you wanted to watch.

His tongue gave you long, slow licks, from your entrance up to your clit, and he made sure to occasionally give you full, open-mouthed kisses. He started a delicious cycle of moving from your clit to your hole, and the feeling of his tongue pushing inside of you always made your walls clench.

You were fighting off your orgasm, wanting this to last as long as possible, but you were so close to the edge.

Levi knew it.

His eyes had only flickered to your face every once in a while, mostly remaining closed with his eyebrows furrowed in concentration and pleasure. However, you dipped your head down to glance at him, and at that same moment, his eyes opened and he tilted his head to catch your gaze, allowing you to see his blown pupils and possessive gaze, and all the love that was behind it.

“Love you,” you whimpered, barely able to form a full sentence.

And, just when you thought it couldn’t feel any better, Levi’s gaze melted into a look full of pure devotion and desperation, and he moaned as his tongue entered you. It was such a lengthy, needy moan, and it reverberated deep inside you as he fucked you with his tongue. You’d never heard a sound like that come out of him before.

And you had never come so hard in all your life.

He helped you through, leaving deep, languid kisses on you as you bucked your hips and coasted through your high, your chest heaving as you gasped for air. But, as you came down and he pulled away to sit next to you on the couch, you knew you still wanted more.

Instead of snuggling into him, you found yourself back on Levi’s lap, surprising him.

“Take off your clothes,” you told him breathlessly, hoping you still sounded demanding enough to get him to do it.

You could see he was about to protest so you kissed him fiercely, your hands already at the hem of your skirt, pushing it off your hips and moving your body so that you could kick it off entirely. When you pulled away from the kiss, you gazed at Levi lovingly, that desperation that had once been in his eyes now fully in yours.

Any hesitation he had slipped away, and you watched in delight as he tugged off his pants, down to his ankles, and then unbuttoned his shirt. You pushed the fabric off of his shoulders before working on getting your own shirt off, unclipping your bra to fully expose yourself.

The two of you were completely bare, mere inches apart, your thighs delicately grazing Levi’s as you hovered over him.

“I just wanted to focus on you, and your pleasure,” Levi murmured, his eyes never straying from yours. “I’ve missed doing that.”

You knew what he was trying to say. He didn’t want you to feel like you needed to repay him. But he didn’t understand, or, more likely, he was still being willfully stubborn.

“Stop denying me what I want,” you whispered, your hands on his sturdy shoulders, “and fuck me until all I can think about is you.”

Levi was quick. His hands found your hips easily and he brought them down, his cock perfectly aligned with your hole. He pushed inside you effortlessly and you automatically arched your back and pressed your chest into his, finally closing the space between you.

You gasped when he entered you, clenching around his dick as your body melted into his. You could see now that you fit perfectly; made for each other. You felt Levi push his face into the crook of your neck, inhaling your scent as his fingers bruised into your hips. His lips ghosted along your skin, making your entire body shiver, nipples hardening against his chest.

He wasted no time in guiding you into a steady rhythm, bouncing you on his cock mercilessly. There was this unspoken connection that you could almost physically feel now, and your desires flowed through it as easily as breathing. Neither of you wanted to go slow or take your time. For Levi, this was centuries of yearning for you, and he was allowing himself to let go, and to be as desperate and needy for you as he wanted. For you, it was similar; the relief of finally having Levi was such an intense feeling, and you were insatiable for him. Perhaps those past lifetimes hidden away in your soul were also satisfying that ache.

Levi bucked his hips up to meet yours and you let him continue moving your hips exactly how he wanted, your rhythm sloppy and inconsistent, and mostly focused on whatever felt good. Every time he bottomed out, your clit brushed against his lower stomach and made you throb around him, which in turn made Levi nearly growl in pleasure.

You were a mess, both physically but also internally. You were gasping for air, whimpers falling from your parted lips that were still plump from your forceful kisses, and Levi was fucking you just as you’d asked him to: to the point of not being able to think straight, and think only of him. Your mind was a jumbled mess, and his name was the only sound that could come out of you.

Levi moved his head away from your throat, his lips trailing up to kiss your lips and drink in your pretty moans, then moved on to kiss along your neck, your temple, until he could speak into your ear.

“Mine,” he whispered, that possessiveness taking over again.

You felt that same surge of possessiveness overtake you as well.

You were his, but he was also yours.

Your hands went from being situated on his shoulders to flying up in his hair, turning his head so you could meet his eyes again. You were addicted to staring at him, especially when he was staring at you.

“Mine,” you breathed out, lashes fluttering.

You felt Levi’s cock twitch inside of you, a tell that he was close, and you pulled him in for another kiss, making sure to clench around him and quicken the pace of your hips.

The two of you came nearly at the same time, Levi reaching his high seconds before you. His hands went from your hips to your upper arms, tearing you away from him, but only so he could look at you as he rode his climax out.

Your head dipped back, exposing your throat, and Levi’s eyes wandered from your parted lips to your bouncing breasts, then all the way down to where the two of you were connected.

Then, you collapsed back into his chest, catching your breath as he held you. A new type of warmth filled you as he nuzzled into your hair, his hands stroking soothing circles into your back.

“I’m sorry I don’t remember,” you blurted out. Your thoughts were still jumbled and you were trying to sort them out, and it had been the first thing you could latch onto and say out loud.

“There’s nothing to be sorry about, silly girl,” Levi answered without hesitation.

“It doesn’t seem fair that you have to carry all this weight,” you sighed, resting your head on his shoulder.

Levi merely hummed, his grip on you tightening, and you both stayed like that for a while, basking in the afterglow of sex.

Eventually, you got dressed again, but you couldn’t imagine leaving this room. You sat back down on the couch, Levi doing the same, and you took his hand in yours, holding it in your lap.

Before, Levi would have been so tense when you initiated any sort of physical touch with him. It was all starting to make so much sense now. He was fighting your connection this whole time; you’d merely thought he was new to affection. And it had been so long since he’d felt your touch, too. He’d probably been so nervous.

“What do we do now?” you asked, your gaze far away as you thought about what was waiting for you outside of this room.

“We get you caught up,” Levi answered, his hand squeezing yours. “I promised you no more secrets. You need to understand why Marley can’t succeed with what they’re planning.”

You nodded once, resisting the urge to sigh. He was right. You couldn’t indulge yourself with just getting personal questions answered anymore.

“Can I ask just one more thing, about you and me?”

Maybe one more wasn’t too bad.

You turned to look at Levi, who was already looking at you.

“Anything,” he conceded.

“Why did you want me to go back home so badly? And it sounds like that’s still your goal,” you murmured, sadness pricking at your heart.

Levi’s lips turned down ever so slightly.

“I thought that maybe you’d prefer to have a normal human life. I didn’t know if you would ever remember me. And I was too cocky – I thought we’d have defeated those damn Warriors before things got too complicated,” he explained. “I also…don’t want to be selfish. You have an entire life there, and people are probably worried about you right at this very moment. Think about what you would be giving up by never going home.”

“I don’t care about any of that,” you said, nearly interrupting him. “You already know my stance.”

Levi lifted your hand and kissed the back of it, his eyes revealing how torn he was.

“There’s more,” he admitted, “but it’s best that you hear it from everyone else.”

“Alright then,” you sighed, finally standing up. Levi stood with you, hands still joined. “I’m ready.”

********

The steam from Hange’s tea fogged up their glasses, but you could still see their gaze set on you from across the table.

You’d opted for a glass of water but were simply swirling the water around in the glass, unable to take a sip with the tension in the air being so thick.

Erwin and Levi were both looming behind Hange. Erwin was staring off into space, contemplating what you’d just told him about your encounter with Reiner, and Levi was as still as a statue, his jaw clenched as he looked at Erwin.

You thought back to Reiner and when he’d captured you, and how he’d revealed Marley’s plan to unite humans and Eldians again, trying to fit the puzzle pieces together. Clearly, there was something he was hiding, or straight up lying about. Judging from the reactions of the three people in front of you, this plan wasn’t as benevolent as Reiner wanted you to think.

“Well, I’ve recapped what went down with Reiner,” you sighed, breaking the silence. “Now fill in the blanks for me.”

Hange’s eyes flashed, and Levi immediately looked at you, only his eyes giving away the tenseness he was feeling. But, he’d promised you the truth.

“Marley isn’t trying to unite Eldians and humans the way Reiner is describing,” Hange started, both hands on their mug of tea. “What he conveniently failed to mention to you is that they want to unite specifically with humans that have magic bloodlines, like you. Regular humans are like animals to them. Marleyans would certainly treat them worse than cattle. They want a total reset, and this is where it gets hard to explain. Essentially, Marley wants to siphon the magic from all Eldians, and even these more powerful humans, to release into the world. Their argument is that that’s how it had been for a very long time, and magic belonged to everyone. However…we’ve evolved as Eldians. To siphon an Eldian’s magic is like sucking the life out of them. And, to be blunt, that’s only an excuse to hide what they really want.”

“What do they really want?” you asked, unease spreading through your body.

“They want chaos,” Erwin answered, fixing his gaze on you. “It’s possible to siphon magic from someone’s being and simply release it into the world, but when that happens…it’s catastrophic. There’s no control over it when it’s not connected to the soul of a person. And someone can absorb that siphoned magic, with the right spell and nerve. But you can’t just transfer it from person to person, it has to be released into the world first before someone can take it for themselves. It’s absolutely illegal to do in Eldia – worse than murder. It’s dangerous. This is part of the reason Marley exists – some Eldians disagreed with the illegality of it. If Marley gets their way, merging realms would mean the magic would basically be knocked out of us. It would kill many, and the rest who survived would have to fight to gain some magic back. It’s survival of the fittest.”

“Cocky bastards think they would be able to absorb most of the magic, that’s why they’re concocting this dumbass plan,” Levi sneered, his eyes hard like steel.

You had known all along on some level that Reiner had been spinning the story a certain way to gain your sympathy, but hearing the whole truth made your blood run cold. You’d wanted so badly to believe that there were good intentions involved, but this solidified it: Reiner, and every Marleyan you’d met, had built a web of lies around you.

Your part in this whole scheme was still a mystery to you, though, and Hange could tell you were trying to piece it together.

“I guess it’s time to tell you why you’re our special girl,” they said, taking off their glasses to wipe the foggy lenses. “Take a deep breath, Emb.”

Levi’s demeanor softened, knowing what was coming, and you gave him a nervous smile when he moved to stand next to you in your seated position, his hand giving your shoulder a comforting squeeze as you took a deep breath like you’d been instructed to do.

“Remember when we told you that Embla was more of a term? A term for a human woman crossing into our realm?”

You nodded once before saying, “Yeah, I remember. Because no human woman has ever crossed over before…only human men.”

“That’s right,” Hange confirmed. “Embla has a special meaning to us. Eldians have myths and prophecies, and Embla is our most important one. Yet another thing that Marley has bastardized.

“Eldians believe that a human woman from Ymir’s bloodline would be the first woman to cross into Eldia and become Eldian herself. There are many versions of how this happens, but from what I’ve witnessed, your blood is simply reacting to the magic around you, and you may even be absorbing some of the natural magic in our atmosphere, no incantations or rituals needed. It’s been very fascinating to watch your aura start morphing, though you’re still more human than Eldian.

“The Embla’s purpose is to save both humans and Eldians. Some, mainly the Marleyans, have taken this to mean that this Embla character will unite the realms. The most popular belief, however, is that Embla will keep another impending war from breaking out between humans and Eldians, which is exactly what Marley is plotting.”

“I want to help,” you insisted, interrupting Hange. “I think you’re right, I think I’m meant to stop the merging of the realms.”

You could feel Levi stiffen beside you. And, though it was subtle, you could see Erwin and Hange both tense up as well.

“That’s the thing, Emb,” Hange whispered, eyes tender. “All my research leads to the same conclusion, which is that you won’t survive the ordeal. You’re a sacrifice.”

There was no way to hide your trembling. You could feel your heart sink into your stomach at the news, could feel the way Levi inched closer to you, as if to protect you from this knowledge.

“Marley wants to use you as the ultimate verse mirror,” Erwin explained. “Your soul is one of a kind and would harbor both human and Eldian traits, and they believe this is the answer for how to merge the realms. It would kill you.”

“Oh,” was all you could say through the knot in your throat.

Now it all made sense. Levi had been trying to shield you from the harsh truth, Hange had been researching day and night for possible solutions, because it was your death that they wanted to prevent and couldn’t. They had kept this from you so you could keep your wits about you while they tried to figure out another way. But there wasn’t another way, was there?

You could only imagine how this was affecting Levi. The pain of losing you through all your human lifetimes, only to find out now that you were someone he was always meant to lose.

“Do you…do you know how it happens?” you asked, avoiding Levi’s gaze.

Hange shook their head, sympathy oozing from their entire body.

“Not exactly. There are so many versions now, and most just reveal that you sacrifice yourself to retain peace between realms, with some versions alluding to a permanent sealing of realms. But I’m still looking into it, Emb. Please don’t take this news the wrong way, your fate isn’t sealed. And we won’t let Marley lay a hand on you. You won’t be their tool.”

Your fate isn’t sealed.

That felt like a lie, and Levi had promised no more lies. Perhaps this was a truth he was trying to create for you.

You swallowed thickly, trying your hardest not to cry, but Levi was suddenly in front of you, crouching down to meet your eyes.

“I won’t let anything happen to you,” he said, and he was almost vibrating with determination. “I don’t care about any fucking prophecies or old myths, to hell with all of them.”

“But if it means saving everyone—” you started, but Levi immediately cut you off.

“I won’t lose you again,” he said, his tone final.

“We’ll give you a two some time,” Erwin announced, practically dragging Hange out of the room. While you appreciated it, it did nothing to calm you down or feel any less heavy in your heart. You stood from your seat, practically touching noses with Levi. You grabbed his arms with shaky hands.

“Levi,” you started again, but this time he cut you off with a forceful, desperate kiss. It was what finally broke the dam, and you let out a sob against his lips, your own lips trembling.

When you broke away, Levi pulled you into his arms, his lips at your ear.

“If we stop Marley, a war won’t break out with the humans and you won’t have anything to worry about,” he murmured into your ear. “I’ll obliterate Marley with my bare hands to make sure you don’t ever have to fight. We’ll figure it out. All you have to do is get used to becoming Eldian and living a long life, with me.”

Your heart stuttered at that possibility. All you’ve wanted was to stay here, in this realm, with Levi. And now they were telling you that this could not only be possible, but you could do it as an Eldian. Levi would never have to watch you live lifetime after lifetime as a human, forgetting him over and over again. You could be together exactly the way you wanted.

But.

“If not now, it’ll happen eventually,” you whispered, your voice breaking. “What I’ve learned is that myths aren’t myths, and fate is fate. If I’m supposed to give my life to save you and everyone else, I’ll do it.”

Levi’s grip on you tightened, as did yours on him.

“What happened to the scaredy cat I knew?” he asked, and at that you finally cracked a smile.

“You make me feel brave,” you answered honestly.

“To hell with everyone else,” Levi whispered, pulling away to gaze into your eyes. “You don’t need to sacrifice yourself to save everyone.”

“I would do it to save you,” you told him firmly. You meant it from the bottom of your heart. In a way, you did agree with Levi. You would gladly give up everything, the entire world, to be with him. You would also gladly give up your life for his.

“I won’t allow that,” Levi said, his voice just as stern. “Your life comes before mine.”

Fresh tears pooled in your eyes, but you blinked them back as best as you could.

Instead of continuing to fight with him, you leaned in for another kiss, capturing his lips in yours before murmuring against them, “I love you.”

Levi broke the kiss, only so he could press his lips to your forehead. Silence enveloped the two of you, and you settled into a more comfortable stance where you could rest your head on Levi’s shoulder while he held you.

Outside, it began to rain.

********

Erwin and Hange made themselves scarce the rest of the day, leaving you and Levi alone to process everything you’d learned. There was an unspoken agreement between you and Levi after that initial conversation to just be with each other and table a discussion about it for later. It felt wrong to do that, in a way, knowing Eldia was running out of time, but now that you knew how much this had been affecting Levi, you just wanted to comfort him, and let him comfort you.

The rain hadn’t let up since it started, and the wind was picking up. In the distance, thunder rumbled. It was melancholy, but also very peaceful.

Levi had taken you back to the parlor room you’d found when you’d run away from them, and you were cuddled up together on the sofa, the kerosene lamps emitting a soft glow while a blue-gray twilight filtered in through the window. The pitter-patter of rain against the glass lulled you into a peaceful trance, your head on Levi’s chest as he sipped some tea.

"I have a question," you whispered to him, your eyes closed.

"That's nothing new with you," Levi responded easily, his tone light and slightly teasing. He was right, of course; he hadn't been the biggest fan of your constant stream of questions in the beginning.

"There's magic everywhere in this world, not just inside of Eldians. I can feel it in the air, and apparently I'm absorbing some of it. But to me, it doesn't feel dangerous or out of control the way Erwin described. Does it not affect me the way it affects you? Or is this magic different?"

"It's forbidden to intentionally strip the magic from within an Eldian," Levi began, "but remember that we're not invincible. All of us die eventually, and we don't take the magic with us to wherever we go after this life. Magic is attached to the soul, and when the soul is no longer attached to this world, the magic is released back into the world, a natural part of the cycle. And magic is all about intent. Most Eldians believe that a soul will say goodbye to its magic, and so the magic is neutralized as its released. Siphoning magic requires malicious intent, and that's why it becomes erratic and dangerous when forcefully removed. The soul doesn't say a proper goodbye. And there's certainly magic that is old and has never belonged to anyone, but all it ever asks for is respect, and is only dangerous if you fuck around."

"If the magic is released once someone dies, then wouldn't people want to take it for themselves?" you asked.

"I'm sure there are some greedy little fuckers out there, but generally, no. We see the released magic as an offering to our realm, as if the passed soul has given a gift," he explained.

"It makes me feel a little gross to be absorbing it, then. It's not a gift for me," you said with a frown, your brows furrowing together.

"Don't worry about that. You didn't even know it was happening. And if it's seeking you out to be absorbed, that's a different story," Levi said.

Another silence swept over the two of you, until you spoke again, eyes slowly opening again, if only to stare at nothing.

"I have another question."

"What a surprise."

“How long will we stay here?” you whispered.

“In this room? However long we fucking feel like,” Levi answered bluntly. It made you smile.

“No, I mean…wherever we are,” you said. “Are we still in the safehouse?”

“We are,” he confirmed, stroking your arm. “It’s charmed to be a little bit of a labyrinth. I’m surprised you were able to get around as easily as you did.”

“It’s probably the magic. Maybe I'm getting stronger,” you sighed, pretending not to feel the way Levi tensed under you.

Before you could pivot the conversation elsewhere, you heard a commotion outside the door to the parlor room. You sat up, moving away from Levi, but he merely adjusted himself in front of you, pushing you against the sofa. In a flash, the door swung open, revealing a disheveled and out of breath Hange.

“We just got word from Miche,” they panted out, jutting an arm out towards you to reveal a piece of paper clutched in their hand. “The Marleyans are making moves. The Military Police have just issued a warrant for Erwin’s arrest.”

“What?” you breathed out, eyes widening in a panic. “What does that mean?”

“Remember, Marley has infiltrated our government. The Military Police is corrupt right now; Marley has full control over them. The MPs are either cooperating to save their necks, or imprisoned,” Levi told you, his eyes flickering to you momentarily before landing back on the paper in Hange’s hand. He stood and walked over to snatch it away and read it himself, his jaw clenching at what he saw.

When his eyes went back to you, you noted the slight panic there.

“They also blew the whistle on you. Not only is Erwin a wanted man, but they just confirmed that you’re here in Eldia, too. There’s a reward for your capture.”

[writertitan]

Perennial // Part 6

a/n: hello again!!! fancy seeing you here!!!

pairing: levi x fem!reader

overall themes: fantasy AU, strangers to lovers, traveling through realms, explicit content

part 5 themes: some violence, gaslighting, emotional distress

read part 5 here

When you awoke, everything felt cold and unfamiliar. Fear crept into your bones as your eyes struggled to adjust to the dim light of wherever you were.

You sat up groggily, one of your hands flying up to your head.

“Ow,” you whispered, wincing at how tender the side of it felt. Then, you felt the dull throbbing in your hand, a scab already forming from where Reiner had drawn blood. “Oh yeah…ow.”

“Sorry about that. I manhandled you a little too rough,” came the unmistakable voice from the other side of the room.

Reiner.

Only a few candles burned in the room, but you could see his silhouette hovering in the corner, the light catching his eyes occasionally.

“You fucking bit me and then knocked me out?!” you shouted, venom lacing every word. The Reiner you’d known would have never hurt you. Then again, everything was different now. It was turning out to be that you’d never really known him at all.

“On accident, darl,” he said, and he had the gall to even sound a little hurt. “Well, your head was on accident. You hit your head on the wall when we moved through the rune. I needed your blood for the rune, but I’m still sorry about that, too.”

That didn’t make it better and you wanted to tell him that, but you bit your tongue. You wanted to keep quiet for a lot of reasons, but the main one being that you couldn’t believe you were in this situation to begin with.

It was like seeing a ghost. You had been mourning Reiner’s death all this time, only to find out he’d never been dead at all.

All of it was a lie.

They’d all lied to you.

Reiner took a step toward you, a tentative one to see how you would react, and you instantly pressed yourself against the wall of the room, wanting as much space between the two of you as possible.

It was so odd. Just a couple of weeks ago, you would have loved nothing more than to reunite with Reiner even just one last time. You’d begged the world for it, hoping someone could have heard your wish and granted it. All you’d wanted was to see him one more time, even if was just to say goodbye and kiss him one more time.

Now? You were physically ill at the sight of him and wanted there to be an ocean between you.

“Don’t come any closer!” you warned, trying to sound intimidating. But Reiner knew you, and he knew that you would submit to fear if he needed to go that route. He knew you to be nothing but a scaredy cat.

Still, he obeyed your orders and kept himself at a distance, retreating back into his corner.

“I’m sorry,” he said, his head hanging low. “You have no idea how sorry I am.”

“Was any of it real?” you asked. The question had blurted itself out without you being able to stop it, but you had to know.

“Of course it was real. It was all real!” Reiner tried to tell you, but tears welled up in your eyes. Not tears of sadness, but of anger.

“Liar!” you spat, eyes like daggers. “You were all a bunch of liars!”

A buzzing erupted from out of nowhere, the air alive with energy, but you couldn’t tell if it was all in your head or if it was actually present in the room. Reiner looked stunned, however, so you were sure it wasn’t just you that had noticed.

Your body felt like it was also buzzing, nearly trembling with the currents of your anger and overwhelming emotions. All you wanted was to get back to Levi and get away from Reiner. You no longer felt safe around this man, this stranger, and there was nothing he could do or say that could make you believe a single word that came out of his mouth anymore.

“Why did you come into the human realm? Why did you pick me, out of everyone?” you asked, slowly standing from your seated position.

“Listen to me…I need you to calm down, darling,” Reiner said, his voice slow and his hand outstretched towards you.

“Don’t call me that!” you shouted, the buzzing getting louder in the room, and rushing through your body. The pet name made you sick now, it made you angry. It made you miss Levi’s nickname for you.

“I’ll tell you what you want to know, if you just promise me that you’ll take some deep breaths and calm yourself down,” Reiner said, his eyes wide, his entire body stiff.

Was he scared of you?

The sudden confusion was enough to quell the buzzing in your body; you also noticed that the energy in the room felt a little lighter, too. You took a few deep breaths, though it killed you to follow orders from him, but it did admittedly calm you down and make you feel a little more yourself.

Had you been the one to change the atmosphere in the room like that so suddenly? It didn’t make any sense to you at all. You were only human – you didn’t have that kind of power. Maybe things were changing because you were no longer in your own world.

“Did I do that?” you whispered, mostly to yourself, but you saw Reiner nod his head once to confirm your suspicions.

Reiner spoke your name, and then had to repeat it because you barely responded to it the first time. Levi’s voice flittered in your head.

Emb.

“You’re different,” Reiner said softly, clearly trying to keep his voice friendly and nonthreatening. “You’re special, unlike other humans.”

“Am I Eldian?” you asked, interrupting him. You didn’t know how you’d feel no matter what he answered. You didn’t even know if you could believe anything he said to you.

“That’s a complicated answer,” Reiner said, which only served to confuse you more.

“I either am or I’m not,” you snapped, “so which is it?”

“You’re not Eldian the way that the rest of us here in this realm are,” Reiner started, clearly trying to find the best way to explain things to you. “But you’re not a normal human. Eldians are their own race now, yes, but they started out as humans, in the human world. Not every Eldian is a Subject of Ymir, but all Eldians come from human witches. Ymir was just one lineage. All Eldians have powerful lineages that date back to when witchcraft was rampant and still existed in the human world. Ymir created this realm to help those witches escape from the mass murders and prosecutions they were facing, essentially taking all magic away from humans. Except not every family escaped to the Eldian realm.”

You knew where he was going with this, but you still couldn’t believe it.

“Your family isn’t exactly the only one in the human realm that still carries magic in their blood. There aren’t many left, that’s true, but they’re out there.”

“Then why me specifically?” you asked, your mind still trying to process what you were hearing. “Why did you seek me out, if there are other people you could have gotten close to? Why did you have to ruin my life?”

“Because they’re not as special as you,” Reiner whispered. “Your particular bloodline is the one we were after.”

“What’s so special about my family? We’re nothing to write home about,” you argued, tears welling up in your eyes. You would have never pegged your family to be instrumental in something like this.

“I don’t know how much you’ve learned so far about our history, but you may have heard more about Ymir’s life. She was given to King Fritz by her family and eventually became the first Titan and created this entire realm to save the witches of the human realm and make them Eldians. Her family didn’t come along into this realm. They stayed in the human realm,” Reiner said.

“You can’t possibly be trying to tell me that I’m related to Ymir,” you choked out, hand clutching at your chest.

“That’s exactly what I’m telling you,” Reiner confirmed, his eyebrows knit together as he stared at you. “We needed a human witch that was somehow connected to Ymir, and we found you.”

“But…but I’m not a witch,” you stuttered out, mind reeling.

“You are, but it’s hard for you to use your full power, especially in the human realm,” Reiner said, voice low again. “We can talk about this more later. Right now, we have to keep moving. Get your bearings and let’s get out of here.”

“What, why?” you asked, pressing yourself against the wall again. “I’m not going anywhere with you! Take me back to Levi right now!”

Reiner recoiled, as if you’d slapped him right across the face.

“Why do you want to go back to him?” he asked, something igniting in his eyes.

At that, you couldn’t keep yourself composed. Your face burned and you looked away, frowning a little. Not only was it awkward to have Reiner find out about your feelings for Levi, but it was also dangerous. You wanted to keep him safe.

But the secret was out, thanks to your big mouth.

“What is Marley trying to accomplish?” you asked, opting to change the subject. “The Scouts don’t seem to be on board with whatever your plan is.”

The ire in Reiner’s eyes faded a little, and he sighed as he ran a hand through his hair. You swallowed thickly; you had plenty of memories of him doing this exact thing. He always messed with his hair when he was stressed out about something.

“We want to erase the borders between the two realms. We want to put an end to thousands of years of conflict. Humanity needs to reclaim what was taken from them. Eldians can’t hold all of this power, all of this magic,” Reiner said.

Did that mean that the Marleyans planned to share magic between the human and Eldian realms? If that was the case, why did the rest of the Eldians think it was so bad?

But you had to admit, the prospect of the realms living in harmony sounded nice. Your mind went back to Levi. If the realms opened up to one another, then that would mean you could be with him, right?

You remembered what Hange had said, back at their house. Marleyans believed that Eldians could turn into mortals and vice versa. What if this was the key to your biggest wish?

You were torn. Clearly, the Scouts didn’t want to go along with whatever Marley was planning. You were certain you didn’t have the full picture yet. But the part of you that wanted to be with Levi was overriding your logic.

“Darling, we have to go,” Reiner urged, tilting his head towards a wooden door near him. His eyes searched yours when you met his gaze again, and you could see the possessiveness behind them. A year ago, it would have made your heart flutter a little bit. But now? Now, you wanted to see that look in someone else’s eyes.

You hesitated, thinking again of those grey eyes, but this time it was like Reiner had read your mind.

“Damn it, what did he do to you? He gave you something to make you feel this way about him,” he growled, his fist hitting against the wall. “Fucking Ackerman. I never thought he’d stoop so low. I’ll kill him.”

At that, your emotions exploded once again. You felt that shock of fear for Levi’s safety, and you also immediately felt defensive of him, and defensive of your own feelings towards him. Immediately, the buzzing returned, both in the air around you and in your body. It was like lighting a match this time, that’s how easy it had come.

“Don’t even think about hurting him,” you warned.

Your heart raced in your chest just at the thought of Levi being in danger. You wanted to reunite with him more than anything else. Every single last cell in your body wanted him at your side again. You were tired of being here with Reiner. You would never be able to shake these feelings of betrayal and resentment. Reiner, Porco, and Pieck had all stained their reputations. You had to remind yourself that you couldn’t trust a single thing any of them said or did. And even if Reiner was telling the truth about Marley’s plans, it didn’t mean you had to help them.

Reiner was frozen in place, clearly not wanting to provoke you more than he already had. Whatever power was hiding in your blood, it was enough to scare even someone as big and strong as him.

You looked at the door, anguished at the knowledge that Levi wasn’t on the other side of it. Again, you felt that desire overtake you; it was the only thing you wanted right then and there, above all else. Just to have Levi be on the other side of the that door.

With Reiner still backed away from you, you knew this was your only chance to escape. You hurried to the door, with only the thought of going back to Levi on your mind. It was your new mission.

The buzzing surrounded you, and you felt a sense of déjà vu as you opened the door. It was like you were back in that gas station again, compelled to open the door.

You ignored Reiner’s protests; he sounded so far away.

You turned the knob and shoved the door open, tensed up and your free hand balling into fist and raising in the air over your head, ready to hit anyone that was on the other side.

“Embla?!”

A voice, and then movement to your left. A person.

Acting only on instinct, all critical thinking out the window, you swung your fist.

By the time your brain caught up to your punch, it was too late.

Hange screamed and fell backward, but was thankfully caught by Erwin before they fully hit the ground.

The guilt hit you like a truck, and then the pain came.

“Motherf—” you gasped out, staring down at your hand with wide eyes. “Punching someone really hurts!”

You uncurled your fingers and winced as you tried to shake the pain off, then turned your attention back to Hange.

“Hange, I’m so sorry!” you exclaimed.

“You’ve got quite a knuckle sandwich,” Hange joked, but they were clearly still a little disoriented. You also saw that you’d made their glasses askew, and you’d made a little crack.

“I didn’t mean to—wait, how did you find me so fast? Where are we?”

You whipped your head around to take in your surroundings, confused. Reiner had never revealed your location to you, but it seemed ridiculous that he hadn’t gotten very far, even with the help of magic.

It was then that your gaze finally fell to Levi.

He was standing at the opposite end of the room, gazing at you over a cup of tea, his eyes wider than you’d ever seen them. He was as still as a statue, frozen in place much like Reiner had been. It was as if he couldn’t believe what he was seeing.

And then, once the both of you locked eyes, he tossed his teacup away and nearly flew to you, suddenly in front of you in the blink of an eye.

“Levi!” you cried out, tears welling up in your eyes. “You found me!”

He looked absolutely bewildered still, but his hands were cupping your face and turning it this way and that, to assess for any injuries.

“Emb,” he breathed out, and then pulled you in for a tight hug, which you eagerly returned.

Just as quickly as he’d pulled you in, he tore you away from him, again giving your entire body a full scan with his eyes.

“Are you okay? What happened? Did that ox-faced son of a bitch hurt you?” Levi interrogated you.

“I’m okay,” you assured him, then turned back to the door, tensing up when you remembered he was right on the other side of it. “If he hasn’t come after me yet, that means he’s trying to escape. What should we do?”

When you turned to look at everyone, they all had the same look of bafflement on their faces. It surprised you; why wouldn’t they be springing to action?

“Do you want him to get away?” you asked.

“Emb…how did you get here?” Levi asked, his eyes searching yours.

“What do you mean? Is this a trick question? I came through there,” you said, pointing to the door.

Levi wordlessly took your hand and walked with you to the door, his hand on the knob. It made you tense up, already preparing to be met with a very irate Reiner, but when Levi swung open the door…

“What the hell?” you whispered, your grip on Levi’s hand tightening. “This can’t be.”

The door opened up to a storage closet, packed with buckets, old rags, and a bunch of other random things. It was barely big enough to fit you.

“Did you go through a verse mirror?” Levi asked you, but you quickly shook your head.

“I just…walked through a door…,” you tried to explain, but nothing made sense.

You hadn’t seen any kind of mirror. You had a hazy recollection of Reiner’s rune before you’d transported through it, but you hadn’t seen anything like that on the door or the walls. And, if what he’d said was true, he would have needed your blood to make it effective.

But upon recalling the events right before stepping through the door, you remembered that sense of déjà vu.

You looked to Levi, then to Hange and Erwin.

“I don’t know how I did it, but I think I had a repeat of when I transported myself into this realm,” you told them. “It felt exactly like that time, and kind of like when we’ve gone through verse mirrors, but it mostly felt like when I’d suddenly found myself here in Eldia.”

“You mean from the time you’d been in the gasoline fort to suddenly being in Shiganshina?” Hange asked.

“Gas station,” you corrected, “and yes, exactly. The feeling was identical to that.”

“How interesting,” Hange mused, their glasses already fixed. “But no verse mirror? Can you describe those feelings for me?”

“Not now, Hange,” Levi snapped. Then, he turned back to you, his eyes yet again scouring your whole body. “Are you sure you’re okay? Did he hurt you? What happened while you were with him?”

“It’s best to give us an overview while it’s all still fresh in your mind, Embla,” Erwin encouraged.

But, as you tried to piece it altogether in your mind, it all hit you like a ton of bricks.

Suddenly, you were overwhelmed with everything that had just occurred. You sunk down to the floor, taking deep breaths as you tried to collect yourself.

Levi knelt down next to you, a protective hand on your shoulder.

“Take your time, Emb,” he whispered reassuringly.

You looked at him, your hand on your chest, over your heart. You could feel it pounding wildly as you thought back to everything Reiner had revealed.

“He told me why the Warriors sought me out,” you said.

Before you could continue, you could feel the energy of the room shift. Something flashed and then darkened in Levi’s eyes, and you could see Hange shift uncomfortably. Erwin remained the most stoic, but you saw the way he tensed his jaw and looked away.

“Do you know something?” you whispered, the question directed at all of them.

Nobody answered.

You felt the blood drain from your face.

“Tell me what you know.”

This time, this was fully directed at Levi. Infuriatingly enough, he’d masked his emotions under a calm façade, making it near impossible to get a good read on him. But the only reason he would put walls up now is because he did know something about what Reiner had been talking about.

“Fuck, is everyone just lying straight to my face now?!” you cried out, springing back to your feet to start pacing the room. You slid a hand through your hair, trying your best to calm down. Still, you felt that buzzing deep in your bones, your blood vibrating with some sort of…power.

It was power you were feeling. It was magic.

You weren’t as frantic and emotional as you had been with Reiner, so it didn’t explode into the room around you, but you felt it within yourself. You looked at the three people you thought you could trust, and you could tell that they saw what was happening to you.

Then, your eyes slid to Levi accusingly.

“I thought you would never lie to me,” you said, your voice curt and angry.

You didn’t want to be there anymore. You wanted to be somewhere else. Part of you even wanted to be home.

You hurried to the nearest door and yanked it open, half expecting it to lead you somewhere else entirely, but there was only an empty hallway waiting for you. It would have to do.

***************

Nobody followed you when you ran out of the room. Levi had silently followed – you’d heard his footsteps trailing behind you – but you quickened your pace and opened door after door, locking each one behind you when you could, until you were fully lost and couldn’t feel Levi’s presence anymore.

You’d ended up in some small parlor room, equipped with a couple of plush sofas and some bookcases stacked with thick volumes of books. You slumped down onto a sofa and curled up on it, wanting your mind to just clear out and be blank for a while. You didn’t want to think about anything. And yet, here you were, mind whirring with so much new information. Your heart wasn’t faring any better, either. There was so much betrayal to unpack there, too.

Everyone was most likely looking for you at this point. People back home were likely looking for you. Warriors were looking for you. Scouts were looking for you. It was certain you were facing some type of danger, but you were too tired to really care.

It felt like you hadn’t slept in years. Exhaustion loomed over you like a cloud, waiting to enshroud you in dreams. You closed your eyes, nuzzling one side of your face into the plush fabric of the sofa you were on, and let yourself drift. Everything, and everyone, would have to wait.

***************

You weren’t sure how long you’d slept for, only that when you woke up, you felt refreshed. On top of that, you were very aware of someone else’s presence in the room with you. However, it didn’t scare you a single bit. It was like you just knew when Levi was near you, like his presence somehow felt different to everyone else’s.

You always just felt safe around him, even when he made you upset.

How infuriating.

Your eyes opened slowly but they found him instantly. He was sitting in a chair across from the sofa you were lying on, his eyes trained on the book he was supposedly reading. But, just like you were able to sense him in the room without even needing to open your eyes, he was able to sense that you were awake. A silent dance between the two of you, always. The moment your eyes fixed upon him, his eyes flitted to you.

“How’d you find me?” you asked, voice barely above a whisper.

“I’ll always find you,” he said, his voice just as soft. He closed the book in his lap with a gentle thud, his fingertips lightly brushing over the gold title on the cover. “You’re a shit hider anyway.”

You laughed a bit, slowly feeling those last dredges of anger melt away from you.

“It’s not fair that you can get me to laugh my way out of being angry with you,” you said, slowly sitting up on the sofa.

Levi took that as an opportunity to move from his chair to the empty space on the sofa next to you, tossing the book onto the end table before letting his hand settle on your thigh.

“I’m not trying to get you to stop being upset with me,” he said. “I didn’t mean to keep things from you. I didn’t know that that would be considered lying. I just didn’t realize you would still be here. I thought we would have gotten you home by now.”

You frowned at that. Was he still so adamant on getting you back to your own human world, even now?

“I’ll tell you everything you want to know. I won’t leave anything out and I won’t omit anything, I promise,” Levi said. "I think it's time to give you that courtesy."

You hated that you already had to bring your mind back to all these horrible events. It was giving you a headache. You just wanted to relax and shove it all to the back of your mind.

“I don’t want to think about this right now,” you mumbled, putting your forehead on Levi’s shoulder. “It’s exhausting, Levi. I didn’t realize I’d be at the center of it all and I don’t know what to do. Everyone’s coming at me from all sides and I still don’t fully understand what’s going on and I don’t know which path is mine.”

Levi slid a tentative arm around your shoulders, keeping you close to him, and you hummed in approval. You couldn’t take another nap to relieve your mind of everything, but you could do something else.

“Like I said, I’m going for full disclosure now. So, ask me anything,” Levi said.

You shifted your body, maneuvering yourself onto Levi’s lap, straddling him as you finally met his gaze. His hands easily shifted with you, settling on your hips. He was getting more comfortable with affection.

“How do you feel about me?” you asked him, biting your lip in anticipation.

Levi stiffened at the question, clearly not expecting it.

“I was hoping we could focus on the more important questions you have,” he said, dodging the question.

“This question is important to me,” you pressed, your hands on his shoulders. “It’s the most important one.”

“It shouldn’t be,” he said, and you could see something in his eyes dim. He was sad.

You cupped his face in your hands, another frown pulling at your mouth. Before you could say anything, Levi spoke again.

“You already know how I feel about you,” he tried to say, but you shook your head, giving him a look.

“How do you feel about me?”

“You’re not asking the right questions,” he breathed out, his eyebrows furrowing together.

“Levi—” you started, but he interrupted you.

“Don’t you think it’s strange that we’re so drawn to each other? And you feel safest when I’m with you, right? Even though you haven’t known me very long, technically.”

You nodded slowly, trying to piece together what he was getting at. The way he was saying these things was making your heart sink. It made something stir inside of you.

“Is there…a reason?” you asked, though you didn’t want to ask.

Levi gave you a pained look.

“Yes.”

At first, the confirmation was a blow to your heart, but you swallowed the feeling back.

“Tell me,” you whispered.

Levi sighed, then started speaking.

“You’re part of Ymir’s bloodline, and all members of my own bloodline have been sworn protectors of Ymir’s blood since this realm was created. Even those of you in the human realm, all of us have always protected you. A blood oath that both of us follow.”

You mulled this over in your head; was this connection really just a result of centuries of biological manipulation? It couldn’t be. And you had a hard time believing that Levi held much stock in it. Plus, something was nagging at you.

“How old are you, Levi? I have a feeling you were around for a lot of what happened between the humans and Ymir herself,” you said. Your mind could hardly wrap around the idea of him being alive for so long.

“I wasn’t,” he said. You could notice that shift in his attitude, the way he looked sadder and sadder. You were getting closer to some important truths. “But you’re right in that I’ve been around for a very long time.”

He had been struggling to maintain eye contact with you, but now he was looking right at you, right into you, as if he could see your very soul. He probably could.

“I’ve known you for a long time, Emb.”

At this, you blinked a couple of times. Had you misheard?

“This really isn’t the time to mess with me,” you whispered, but your heart was thudding in your chest, like your body knew something you didn’t.

Your memories of your life were linear. You remembered being a child, you’d seen pictures of yourself as a baby twenty-something years ago, so what Levi was alluding to made absolutely no sense to you at all.

Levi cupped your face in his hands, his eyes hard but filled with discomfort, and your eyes brimmed with tears. Something weighed heavy on your soul. He wasn’t talking about a normal human life. Even the innermost part of you knew that. What you knew as a human wasn't the whole truth.

“I don’t know how much you’ll be able to understand, but you’ve been reincarnating over and over as a human. You’re part of Ymir’s bloodline that never crossed over to this realm, and there were consequences to that. I’d watched over you for so long, tried to help you cross to this realm so many times, but I could never do it. And then the Marleyans went rogue, and it was difficult to visit your world, and then it was harder and harder to watch you cycle through life and death and never remember me. And then it was impossible to cross to your realm. It was killing me, not visiting your world in so long.”

At this point, he was nearly rambling, such an unlikely thing for him to do, but you were trying your best to keep up with what he was saying.

“Why did you keep this from me?” you whimpered, throat so constricted it was hard to even whisper the words out loud. Levi’s eyes weren’t as sad now that he'd confessed this to you, but they still reserved his truest emotions behind an invisible wall, one that was crumbling down.

“At first, I didn’t want to believe it was really you and I tried to keep you at a distance. Maybe you’d had a daughter, maybe you somehow had a twin this time…but you’re you. You’re still the same woman I’ve—”

He stopped himself, but your heart skipped a beat at what you knew he was about to say. Then, he went on.

“And I thought I could change your fate. Maybe, if I didn’t say anything, you wouldn’t develop feelings for me. And I didn’t want you to have feelings for me just because you always did in the past. I would have let you go.”

“My fate?” you whispered, mostly to yourself, trying to understand.

There was so much you wanted to say to Levi. Your very soul sang with his revelations, and you knew everything he’d said was true. How many times had you met Levi, and loved him, and said goodbye to him, only to do it all over again? Why had he let himself suffer time after time?

“If you don’t mind, I’ll save the whole ‘destiny and fate’ discussion for when we meet with Hange again,” Levi murmured. “It’s not me hiding anything…Hange just knows the stories better.”

You were quiet for a few moments, your eyes traveling across Levi’s face, memorizing it. You leaned in to kiss his jaw, relishing in the way it made him shiver.

“I’ve had dreams about you,” you murmured into his skin, flashes of those very dreams flitting across the front of your mind. His sad eyes, the smell of rain, the smell of him. “They always felt so familiar. My heart remembers you.”

You felt Levi swallow thickly.

“I think all my paths lead back to you,” you told him, pressing yourself into him.

Levi pushed his hips up to press against yours, making you squirm in delight on his lap. But you wouldn’t give in so easily. He still hadn’t outright answered your question.

“How do you feel about me, Levi?” you urged, hands slipping under his shirt. You needed to hear him say the words, the very same words that were bubbling up inside of you. It didn’t matter if you’d never had a choice of loving him. Despite Levi trying to push you away, you’d chosen him anyway.

You met his gaze again, though he tried to hide from your eyes. But, metaphorically speaking, you’d stripped him bare. That invisible wall had come down for you. Every emotion was now very clear to you. In his eyes, you could see how much he’d pined for you, how much he’d missed you. That dormant part of you, the currently unreachable void that stored away all the time you’d spent with him before, told you exactly what he was feeling.

You could tell it was still hard for him to say the words, despite the truth laid out in front of you. He hesitated, but you knew it was only because this was the first time he’d been able to feel this way and speak this way in a very, very long time.

“I’ve always loved you,” he choked out, his eyes melted steel and more vulnerable than you’d ever seen. A sight you’d cherish for the rest of your life. "I'll always love you."

read party 7 here

[writertitan]

OH MY GOD I THOUGHT MY EYES WERE DECEIVING ME WRITERTITAN IS BACK WHAT

SO BACK AND LOVING IT, HELLO!!

[writertitan]

Perennial // Part 5

a/n: we gotta update the tumblr baddies in case they haven't seen this on AO3

pairing: levi x fem!reader

overall themes: fantasy AU, strangers to lovers, traveling through realms, explicit content

part 5 themes: **NSFW** AND 18+ ONLY!! sexually explicit content again. some violence.

read part 4 here

You wanted to stay.

Stay in Eldia, stay with Levi, even stay like this, in bed and in his embrace, forever.

You thought you had been quiet enough for only you to hear your secret wish, but immediately, Levi’s stopped caressing you and his breathing stopped.

You bit your lip and moved your head so you could look at Levi, not surprised to see he had opened his eyes and was staring at you now, grey eyes glinting in the dim light.

He whispered your real name, and for some reason, it made you sad. Why did it make you want to cry?

“You’ve never said my real name before,” you whispered back, throat constricted.

“I said it because I have to remind myself,” he said, one hand reaching up to move some of your hair from your face.

“Remind yourself of what?” you asked, already knowing the answer.

“Remind myself that you’re human.”

Human. This was the only time in your life you hadn’t wanted to be human. You wanted to be whatever Levi was.

“You don’t want me to stay?” you asked, eyes burning as tears threatened to well up in them.

“It doesn’t matter what I want. You have an entire life that’s waiting for you,” Levi said, his face calm. He was trying to hide behind his mask, but you weren’t having it.

“What about what I want?” you pressed, eyes pleading with him.

Levi’s composure faltered for a moment, and the anguish that flittered through his eyes broke your heart in two.

“We’ll talk about this another time,” he said. “Go to sleep, Emb.”

The nickname calmed you significantly. Instead of cuddling up to go to sleep, however, you lifted yourself to straddle him, hands splayed out on his firm chest.

“I don’t want to sleep,” you told him, voice laced with stubbornness and arousal. If he was going to act like this, then you’d act like every moment would be your last with Levi.

You sat on his half-hard dick, watching as Levi’s eyes clouded over with lust. His hands took hold of your hips, helping you rub against him until you felt him get harder, his leaking tip nudging up against your clit.

The little grunt that forced its way out of his throat made your heart skip a beat, your sorrows already beginning to ebb away.

Levi’s fingers pressed into your skin, his grip on your hips tightening as his eyes took in the sight of you.

“You’re always driving me crazy,” he whispered, his eyes finding yours. In response, you gave him a smug smile and rolled your hips slowly, making sure he felt every inch of you.

His eyebrows pulled together as he sunk his head further into the pillow, hands helping guide your movements. More and more, the head of his cock would brush over your hole, making you shiver each time it happened. He teased you as much as you teased him.

You took one of his hands and slid it up to your breast, biting your lip when he immediately gave it a gentle squeeze and played with your nipple. In that moment of distraction, he lifted his hips and maneuvered so that he could push into you, causing your jaw to drop. It was easy to slip inside; you were still so wet, only getting more aroused, and you had Levi’s cum inside of you, so there wasn’t much resistance at all.

Although you were the one on top, Levi absolutely dominated you, his hips bucking up forcefully to keep up a fast and rough rhythm.

Whereas the previous time had been gentler, this time felt more desperate, more frantic. The two of you needed each other like you needed air, and your painful conversation was being blocked out and yet acted upon. You didn’t want to think about it, but you were also fucking each other like you’d never get the opportunity again, like any second it could be over.

You pushed both hands down, one on his chest and one on his stomach, your hips moving with his in that same frantic rhythm. You were already so close, but before you could even tell him or move a hand to work on your clit, Levi sat up and embraced you, his lips on yours in an instant.

You moaned into his mouth as the two of you writhed against each other in that position, the new angle hitting all the right spots.

“I’m gonna come again,” you murmured against his lips, and Levi merely held you closer, letting you work his cock the way you needed to. One of his hands moved between you to rub your clit, and it coaxed out yet another intense orgasm from you.

Your head fell to his shoulder as he helped you ride it out, breathless and mewling into his skin. You could feel him twitching inside of you, a sign he wasn’t far behind, but he lifted you off of him and pulled himself out of you, one hand on your thigh while the other stroked his cock. You watched through heavily lidded eyes as he came, his cum spurting lazily over his lower stomach.

The two of you shared one more sloppy kiss before Levi pulled away, leaving you with a feather light kiss on the forehead before hurrying to the bathroom to clean himself up and find you a rag.

You laid back down on the bed to catch your breath, eyes on the ceiling as your heart rate slowed. Eventually, Levi came back in, cleaned up and dressed in some sleeping clothes. He had a damp cloth with him and cleaned you up between your legs, his touch gentle and deliberate. When he was done, he gave your hipbone a little kiss, just a quick brush of his lips.

Even though you’d just done much more intimate things, this act of kindness and respect was what made your face heat up and your body squirm. Levi also seemed a little awkward, barely able to meet your eyes as he rid himself of the cloth before settling back into bed with you.

Once again, you found your favorite spot pressed up against him, your eyes heavy with exhaustion.

“Don’t you want some pajamas?” Levi whispered. You hummed, only slightly aware that you were still fully naked while he was now fully clothed. But you were finally tuckered out, ready to sleep now that those two orgasms had loosened you up and gave you all sorts of release. It didn’t bother you so much, and Levi was warm enough that you wouldn’t get cold.

You whined when you felt Levi pull away, but you opened your eyes slightly when you felt Levi tugging the pajamas Hange had given you onto your body. They felt warm, like they’d just been in the dryer.

When Levi finally settled down next to you for good, you draped an arm over his stomach, legs intertwining with his. You’d never been much of a cuddly sleeper before this, but that urge to feel close to Levi wasn’t going away.

“Good night, Emb,” he murmured, and you tucked your head into the crook of neck.

“Good night, Levi,” you whispered back. This time, you said your little wish in your head.

Let me stay here.

*****************************

The next morning, you woke up feeling more refreshed than you’d been in a long time. It was very early morning and, much to your glee, Levi hadn’t left you alone. He was still beside you in bed, keeping you tucked into his side with his arm while the other rested behind his head. His eyes were closed and he looked calm in his sleep, chest rising and falling in even breaths. You carefully leaned up onto your elbow, taking in the sight of him.

You couldn’t stop staring at him, especially when he was like this. He looked breathtaking, the morning sunlight making his pale skin glow and his dark hair shine.

“You really need to stop staring at me all the time.”

His voice startled you and you jolted a bit, face heating up. His voice didn’t seem tinged with sleep at all, and he sounded awake.

“How long have you been up?” you asked, a little embarrassed that you’d been caught yet again.

“For a while,” Levi answered, eyes slowly opening.

You smiled at the sight of those silvery eyes, a hand reaching up to move some of his hair from his forehead. He didn’t shy away from your touch, but you noticed the way his ears turned a little pink.

“What’s the agenda for today?” you asked, voice hardly above a whisper.

“Hange’s been doing a lot of research, but today’s the day they want to venture out for a second opinion and start bouncing off ideas on how to get you home. We’ll probably have to travel through a verse mirror back to Shiganshina to meet up with Erwin and some of my other colleagues now that they’re all returning there from wherever the hell they all scampered off to. We both agreed you’d be safest there, protected by all of us.”

You mulled over his words for a bit, thinking back to that town you’d arrived in.

“Will I have to keep being cooped up inside?” you asked.

Levi nodded once, his hand trailing up and down your side soothingly.

“The Three Nights are over,” he said, hand stopping at your hip. “There are already rumors about a human coming into Eldia. It’s a risk going back to Shiganshina because of that, but we have to do it.”

You pondered until you suddenly heard it – noise, life, outside the window.

You shot up from your position in bed to race to the window, your entire face practically pushed up against the pane of glass as you ogled at the presence of Eldians.

They were all just living their lives. Young mothers carrying chubby-cheeked infants, strong men lugging large sacks of flour over their shoulders, schoolboys kicking balls to each other and roughhousing. The only thing that differentiated them from your own world was the fashion, but you secretly loved what they wore. It was old-fashioned, something you could never get away with wearing back home.

You didn’t notice Levi was standing beside you until he spoke up, spooking you a little bit.

“Don’t go getting any ideas,” he warned, but you knew he could see that starry-eyed look you had donned.

“Levi, you can’t keep me cooped up forever,” you pointed out, finally tearing your eyes away to look at him instead. “Just give me some new clothes and a damn bonnet or something. It’s not like they can smell the human in me…right?”

Levi frowned, his arms folded over his chest.

“It’s your…it’s your aura. It’s very human. An outfit change would only mask it a little bit, not a lot.”

It was your turn to frown. There was still so much you didn’t know about this realm. You were literally giving out human vibes without even knowing.

“I don’t want to be locked away, Levi,” you whined, your face back at the window.

These Eldians weren’t even the slightest bit intimidating. Wouldn’t they be open-minded to the idea of a human being over here? Hange and Levi had taken it in stride, why couldn’t the other Eldians? Was Levi not giving them enough credit?

“We’ll get you some new clothes because we’ll need to take every precaution we can. But you’re not venturing out there, Embla,” Levi said, his tone alerting you that this decision was final.

Your face fell, and you cast one last look outside before stepping away from the window.

“Fine,” you whispered, not meeting Levi’s gaze. He caught your arm before you could slip past him, and your face got warm when you felt Levi take your chin between his fingers and gently had you look at him.

“I just want to keep you safe, Emb,” he reminded you, his gaze and voice entirely sincere. “Let me do that.”

At that, your heart melted. Maybe he was a little too overprotective, but you had to admit that you liked it a little bit, even if it pissed you off.

You dared lean in for a kiss, which Levi accepted, and you gave him a small smile when you pulled away, thrilled to see that you’d taken him off guard.

He couldn’t say anything, though, because Hange was bursting into the room moments later, looking actually put together for once.

“Good morning, lovebirds!” they sang, though they didn’t notice the way your entire face heated up. “Let’s get this show on the road! I have some clothes our Embla can wear, and the verse mirror is just waiting to be used.”

“Were you eavesdropping again, Four Eyes?” Levi snapped.

They immediately got into it with each other and you stayed out of it, smiling to yourself at their bickering. It felt natural, just being there with them and listening. You could very much get used to it.

Hange threw you what felt like a potato sack in the middle of taunting Levi, but when you peered inside, you found some neatly folded up garments. You turned to the bed, dumping everything out. You found freshly washed clothes consisting of a blouse, a heavy skirt and underskirt, and a shawl and boots.

“Everything should be charmed to fit,” Hange piped up, shoving Levi out of the way to get to you. “And let’s replace that nifty little bag of yours you’ve been carrying around with something that fits more of this realm. I’ll get out of your hair and let you get changed before we leave. Shall I take Levi along, or do you want him drooling like a dog in here with you?”

“Hange!” Levi barked, making them cackle.

You let out an embarrassed laugh, shaking your head.

“Both of you can have it out with each other outside,” you said, lifting the blouse up to inspect it more.

They left the room and you began peeling off your borrowed pajamas, dressing into what Hange had given you. It all fit reasonably well, even the boots, and you began packing your own clothes into the sack.

As you left the guestroom to join Levi and Hange in the living room, they both looked up and took in the sight of you. Hange looked pleased, but your attention was on Levi, whose eyes drank you in from the top of your head to the tips of your toes.

“What do you think?” you asked, hands clasped behind your back.

“Wow, Emb! You look…,” Hange started, but Levi cut them off.

“It’ll work,” he said. It was the closest thing to a compliment you were gonna get, so you took it.

Hange took the sack from you and tossed your backpack into it as well, mumbling something about using some magic to get it compact.

You hardly listened. You were gravitating towards Levi, standing in front of him as he nursed some tea.

“So? Is my aura less human?” you asked in a teasing voice.

Levi cleared his throat, his ears tinged pink.

“A little,” he mumbled, making you grin.

Hange returned moments later with some type of knapsack, tossing it over to you. You caught it easily and marveled at how light it was. There was no way she’d been able to fit your things into this thing and have it feel lightweight.

A flash of envy coursed through you. It must have been amazing to wield powers like that, even if it was just for small things, like compacting items like this.

“Thanks, Hange,” you said, tying the knapsack around your shoulders.

“Anything else before we leave?” Hange asked, hands on their hips.

“Wait,” Levi said, then went to the kitchen, returning with a mug filled with some type of liquid. He was handing it over to you and you took it quickly, peering inside. The liquid sloshed around a bit, and you were intrigued by the bluish tint it held. It looked like little more than river water.

“What’s this?” you asked, giving it a sniff. It was odorless, which was even more interesting.

“Drink up,” was all Levi said.

“Ooh, so that’s what you were doing yesterday,” Hange said as you downed the liquid. It even tasted like nothing.

“Care to tell me what I just drank?” you pushed, setting the mug down on the coffee table.

“It’s just a little liquid magic. It helps make people a little unaware of you,” Hange explained. “Not entirely invisible, but already your aura is very muted. I wouldn’t give you a second glance. Levi must have gotten his hands on some tohka oil from the apothecary in town. I thought you were above stealing these days, short stuff.”

“What makes you think I stole?” Levi asked, sounding almost bored.

“There’s no way you could have afforded old man Spiglitz’s prices,” Hange snickered. “He’s a bastard when it comes to his herbal stuff.”

Levi scoffed and gave Hange a glare, and before your very eyes, the mug disappeared from the coffee table.

“Whoa,” you breathed out, eyes widening.

“That did the trick real nice,” Levi said flatly, his eyes moving over you. “Just keep your head down and we should be fine for the next few hours. That’s all the time we need.” You nodded, heart pounding a little bit.

You were going outside, you were going to be around other Eldians. Apparently, they would barely notice you, but that was fine. The nerves were already buzzing within you and you took a deep breath, squaring your shoulders.

“I’m ready,” you announced, and then you were heading out of Hange’s house, saying a quiet goodbye in your head in case you never got to come back.

You tried not to think about that, and kept yourself focused on the task at hand. It was time to go back to Shiganshina.

*****************************

It had been a joy to walk the streets of Ragako with so many people around. Whatever potion you drank had worked wonders. Nobody had so much as glanced your way.

It was sad, leaving the village now that everyone was up and about. Hange greeted a few people and Levi offered some curt greetings as well, but they were quick to say they were needed in Shiganshina so they could hurry you out of there.

You were on the outskirts of the village soon enough, with Hange prattling on about the verse mirror you were headed to.

It was located in the temple the rest of the villagers had previously been in, but Hange assured you that it would be empty now that everyone needed to get back to their regular lives.

“The priestess will still be there, but this is around the time she goes to the altar space for prayers. We’ll sneak you in and it’ll be fine,” they said. “The mirror is underground. Just don’t freak out at how claustrophobic it is.”

“Aren’t you guys worried someone else will be there trying to use the mirror?” you asked.

“Most Eldians can’t,” Levi said. “Verse mirror locations are confidential, even within our own military. The regiment Hange and I belong to, the Scouts, is basically the only regiment that can get full access, with a few exceptions. And, on top of that, the Scouts are typically the only ones strong enough to even work a verse mirror. Remember, it can take a toll on the body and mind, and most people don’t have that kind of strength. You didn’t have a problem with it, but my theory is that you’re just a freak of nature.”

“Thanks for that.”

You’d entered the wooded area around Ragako at this point, and you took in the thin pine trees and well-worn path you were on with wonder. Rays of sunlight glittered through the trees, and you immediately noticed the stone temple, though it was still shrouded by greenery.

Eventually, you were standing right in front of it, your face tilted up at the grand building. It wasn’t a skyscraper by any means, but it was very tall – strong competition against the cathedrals of your own world. The simplistic design of stone and stained glass covered in moss and ivy made it look timeless, and the enormous wooden doors held carvings within them, pictures that told some sort of story. Levi opened a door and went in before you, with Hange behind you. Your footsteps echoed inside, and you took in the sight before you. The space was…smaller than you’d imagined. It didn’t make sense at first. Your mind was referencing the cathedrals and extravagant churches you’d been to, where the entire church was one big space, and stained-glass windows took up entire walls that were a hundred feet high, and marble sculptures that were quadruple your size. This was just a room with stone pews and an altar space at the front. It was still large and not at all claustrophobic, clearly big enough to fit at least most of the village, but there was a ceiling with herbs and ribbons that hung from it, rather than open air for hundreds of feet that would allow for even more echoing and extravagance to show off the talents of a choir. Levi immediately began leading you to the left, where a smaller wooden door was situated.

“It’s…small,” you commented, your head still turned to take in the sight of the room.

“You’re forgetting that most of the space is dedicated to housing the villagers for events like the Three Nights,” Levi reminded you, and suddenly it did make more sense. “There’s a door that leads upstairs, and there are living quarters up there.”

Part of you wanted to explore, to take a look at the entirety of the church, but you knew there wasn’t time and that Levi wouldn’t have allowed it no matter what.

As he ushered you in through a smaller red door, you heard a woman’s voice call to Hange.

“Hange! I was so sad to know you couldn’t join us for the Three Nights,” you overheard, but that was all you got before the door muffled the sounds. You thought you heard the voice ask if Levi was the one popping through the door, but you had to push that to the back of your mind and focus on the task at hand.

“We might have to go without Hange. Damn,” Levi muttered, his eyebrows scrunched together.

You frowned, casting a worried glance over your shoulder towards the door, but then turned back to look around. Instantly, you spotted something covered in a dirty white sheet in the corner of the room, and knew your heart that a mirror was hidden there.

And you were right. Levi went over and yanked the sheet off, exposing a cracked mirror. It looked like one of those antique mirrors back home, a standing mirror that was held up by a wooden frame.

“Fuck,” Levi cursed. His back was to you, but you could imagine the stormy look in his eyes. “It’s fucking cracked, are you fucking kidding me?”

“Cool it with the cussing, captain,” you said, a teasing lilt to your voice. You hoped it would calm him down. “Are we not able to pass through if a verse mirror is cracked?”

“Not really,” Levi sighed, his jaw clenched as he turned to you. “It can be done, but we’d have to link up directly to another verse mirror rather than just pass through to a random ass place. The only other one in Shiganshina that isn’t at Norchek Temple is in a place I don’t want to risk you being in.”

You raised a brow, shrugging a shoulder. “And why can’t we just link to the one at Norchek Temple?”

“It’s daylight and it’s also a popular mirror for the Scouts. We could run into people,” Levi said.

“But you put some sort of spell on me, didn’t you? Nobody will really notice me,” you reminded him. “You said so yourself – it’ll hold for a few hours.”

“You’re right, but a cracked mirror is volatile. I’m not sure the magic will hold while passing through it,” Levi said, a little sigh escaping him.

“It’s our only choice right now, if you don't want me going to the other place,” you said softly.

Both of you knew that you were right. There wasn’t much time to argue about it anymore. Levi acquiesced, giving a curt nod before taking your hand in his. This was no time to get butterflies, but they soared in your abdomen anyway, and you linked your fingers with his without another thought.

“Don���t let go of my hand,” he instructed. You nodded once, watching as he repeated what he’d done the first time you’d gone through a mirror with him. He lifted his hand and closed his eyes, looking concentrated and a little strained. You inched closer to basically be glued at his side, closing your eyes as well.

That buzzing sensation overwhelmed you suddenly, and you felt compelled to go through the mirror. You felt Levi pulling you forward and so you walked, and though you were walking right towards the mirror, you never felt yourself come into contact with it. But you could feel the sensations of traveling through it, like static was fuzzing over your entire body.

When you opened your eyes, you were back in Norcheck Temple.

It was empty and quiet, still damp and musty. You shivered, huddling closer to Levi, who instinctively pulled you closer to him.

“Be quiet.” His lips brushed over the shell of your ear as he whispered into it.

You turned to look at the mirror, worrying your lip at the thought of leaving Hange behind, but Levi caught your look and nudged you, making you look at him again. When your eyes landed on him, you finally noticed how winded he was. Beads of sweat decorated his forehead, and his breathing was forceful, as if he’d just run a marathon. It was worse than the last time you’d done this, probably due to the fact that you had just passed through a cracked mirror.

He left your side after mumbling he was going to do a quick perimeter check, and you stood there awkwardly, fiddling with your new clothes and checking the mirror every once in a while to see if Hange could pass through.

Levi came back a minute later, looking a little better, and less on edge.

“Clear,” he said, immediately taking your hand in his to tug you out of the temple. “We’ll just have to lay low.”

“What about Hange?” you protested, frowning at him.

“Hange can take care of themselves. They may act like a shit-for-brains lunatic, but they’re scrappy,” Levi said.

You merely nodded, still feeling that odd pit in your stomach, like your gut was trying to tell you something.

The walk back to Shiganshina was sort of familiar. This time, however, it was in broad daylight and that beautiful night sky wasn’t visible to you. Still, the forest around you seemed to come alive; birds sang to each other and butterflies flitted across your vision. Everything was so golden and green around you, rich with color and life. As always, you marveled at the beauty of it all.

Levi never let go of your hand. Whenever you’d become aware of that, your heart would go a little faster, and then you’d have to force yourself to calm down. But your feelings for him were growing; the more time you spent with him, the more you found yourself daydreaming of what your life could be like here, with Levi specifically in the picture. Was it strange to feel so intensely?

He was quiet for most of the walk, and you were too, but your head was also filled with millions of questions, ranging from wondering if Hange was okay, to wanting to know how Levi felt about you, to wanting to know more about Eldia.

As the forest shifting around you to make way for the town of Shiganshina, you finally were able to push your questions to the back of your mind, choosing instead to take in the new sights around you.

It was as you remembered. Shiganshina was lively, though, filled with people this time. The buzz of chatter and general life floated through the air, and your eyes scanned the area with delight. The colorful, compressed buildings, the bustling townspeople, the stray dogs playing with the children. In the distance, you heard church bells.

“Stay just a little behind me,” Levi instructed, and you did as you were told, shuffling back a bit so you were more guarded by him.

He led you through narrow alleys and more deserted areas, still clutching your hand, but you yearned to be back with the rest of the townspeople, just to watch them live their lives.

When Levi let go of your hand, you felt strangely disconnected to him, but you watched as he made his way to some front door tucked away in a particularly dingy alleyway. He knocked on the door, calling out for someone named Erwin, and you hung back awkwardly.

You turned, however, when you heard the pitter-patter of footsteps, surprised to see a small boy running towards a ball that was rolling towards you.

You stopped the ball by lightly pressing the toe of your shoe to it, bending down to pick it up. The boy caught up soon enough, a little out of breath, and you gave him a smile as you handed the ball back to him.

“Thank you, ma’am,” he said, which made you laugh a little. He was adorable, all chubby cheeks and curly hair.

“You’re welcome,” you responded. “Have fun playing ball with your friends.”

He ran off and you turned back to Levi, who was giving you a hard stare.

“Oh c’mon Levi, he was just a kid,” you said with a frown.

“You never know. Sometimes they’re tricky little pieces of shit,” he said flatly.

You were about to chastise him for talking that way about children, but the door opened to reveal a tall and broad man with blond hair and the most intimidating eyebrows you’d ever seen. He only gave Levi a cursory glance and a curt nod as a greeting before his eyes immediately flitted to you.

“The human,” he said, his deep voice nearly booming despite not having raised his voice.

“They call me Embla around these parts,” you joked feebly, shrinking back under his scrutinous gaze.

“Erwin, are you gonna let us in or not?” Levi asked, voice monotone. But his eyes were flashing, the silver catching in the sunlight beautifully.

Erwin stepped aside and you hurried to follow Levi inside. You were a little surprised to see that this wasn’t Erwin’s home or, at least, you hoped it wasn’t his home. It was barely anything at all, just a room made of brick that looked dirty and old. A rickety desk was shoved against the corner, papers neatly organized on it with some books opened. On the opposite wall, also shoved in the corner, was what looked to be barely more than a cot.

“I’m sorry that this isn’t much of a hosting space,” Erwin said to you, and then gestured towards the uncomfortable looking chair by the desk. “Care to sit?”

You took him up on the offer, happy to be able to rest, and then gave him a nervous smile.

“Do you live here?” you asked, unable to keep the curiosity at bay.

At that, Levi actually snorted, amusement flashing through his eyes briefly. Your heart soared a little – Levi hadn’t ever expressed that type of emotion to you before.

“Basically,” Levi said, clearly being sarcastic.

“This is a safehouse,” Erwin answered, ignoring Levi’s reaction entirely. “I’m not sure how familiar you are with our current situation, but there have been some…bad developments recently for Eldians.”

Both you and Levi grew tense at that, but Levi even more so.

“What are you talking about?” he asked Erwin, but the taller man just gave him a knowing look.

“Marley is infiltrating our military and attacking,” he said, and you felt a knot form in your throat and a rock fall in your stomach. “The other regiments can’t be trusted – the Warriors got to them first – and all Scouts have gone underground.”

“When did this happen?” Levi pressed.

“They timed the beginnings of their attack in time with the Three Nights,” Erwin began, “but it wasn’t until yesterday afternoon that they tried to corner our regiment. Thankfully, Armin and I had been anticipating this. Our plan was executed masterfully.”

“But everything seems so normal out there,” you blurted out, face heating up when Levi and Erwin turned to you. “I-I mean, the town looked…peaceful.”

Erwin nodded, understanding you, his eyes still holding a certain curiosity as he took in the sight of you.

“They’re cunning and working silently. Their first step is a military takeover. They’re making sure no information is getting out to the public so as to not cause widespread panic. A revolution would certainly make this more difficult. Once they hold complete power over our military, their control of the public will begin, and if that happens, Eldia is at the mercy of Marley. The Scouts are the last line of defense. We cannot let them take control of our regiment.”

“I shouldn’t have brought you here,” Levi said, his eyes pained. “We need to get an escape plan in order. We need to get you home as soon as possible.”

Panic flared through you, for so many reasons. Leaving Levi behind to fight this fight, going back to a world full of lies and pain, the thought of Eldians being in trouble – all of it made your heart tighten painfully.

“What if I can help?” you pushed, your eyes desperate as you looked between Erwin and Levi. “Please let me help.”

“Absolutely not,” Levi said forcefully, his gaze hard.

“Levi –” Erwin started, but Levi cut him off.

“I said no,” Levi snapped, arms folded over his chest. He didn’t even give Erwin a glance his way. Erwin, on the other hand, was glancing between the two of you, clearly connecting some dots in his head.

“Excuse me for a moment,” Erwin said, and you watched in shock as pushed on a certain brick on the wall by his cot, a hidden door popping out from the brick. He left without another word.

Clearly, he was giving you and Levi privacy to have it out with each other, and you briefly commended his intuition in your head before turning your attention back on Levi.

Before you could even say anything, Levi beat you to it.

“No.”

“Why not, Levi?!”

You stood up quickly, nearly knocking the chair over as you closed the distance between you.

“This isn’t your fight, Emb,” Levi said, his thin brows scrunching together.

“Says who?” you argued. “This has something to do with me, Levi. We all know it. You’ll still need me here to figure out the reason behind all this!”

“And what if you do stay, then what?”

The question caught you off guard. You blinked at him in surprise, mouth slightly ajar.

“W-what?” you stammered out.

“What if you stay and fight, and you come to face-to-face with Pieck Finger?” Levi pressed, his expression void of any emotion. “What then? She is the enemy, along with everyone else you met in your world. Will you help the Eldians, or will you help the Marleyans?”

“The Marleyans are the ones in the wrong,” you answered lamely, but you knew where he was going with this.

“That doesn’t answer my question. If you fight for Eldia, but end up facing your Warrior friends, will you do what you need to do? Can you actually see yourself fighting them?”

It was a fair question. You thought back to your friends, your dead lover, and the memories you shared. They’d felt so real once before, but now you were doubting yourself. Had any of it been real? If they’d been targeting you from the start, was all of it a farce?

The laughter, the love, the connections…had they controlled all of that?

But it had been real to you.

You stared at Levi, taking in the details of his handsome face. You were creating new memories here with him, with Hange, with Eldia in general. None of this could be a lie. It wasn’t like an Eldian had called for you or had set you up to be here. You’d been in control this whole time. No one else had orchestrated this.

You wanted it to stay that way.

“I’m not the girl I used to be. The Warriors know that girl; they don’t know who I’m becoming now that I’ve seen this world. Things are different now. I’ll always care about them, but I can’t let them do this,” you answered, your voice unwavering.

You met Levi’s gaze bravely, standing straight with your hands clasped behind your back. You wanted to look confident, to assert yourself for once. You wanted to look, and be, brave.

Levi looked visibly conflicted, but he gave a sigh and clicked his tongue in annoyance before leaning in to press his lips to yours, his hands pulling you in by your waist.

You fell into the kiss instantly, hands unclasping to grab onto Levi and keep him close.

He kissed you fervently, stumbling with you until your back hit the wall. You clung to him like your life depended on it, your face hot upon realizing that the heat of the kiss had traveled straight down, between your legs. Now was not the time at all, but you wanted him so badly.

You pressed yourself against him, delighted to feel the tent in his pants as your hips pushed together. Levi groaned softly into your mouth, his fingers digging into your hips.

But he pulled away before you could do more, however, and you caught your breath but didn’t let go of him, keeping him close so you could rest your head on his shoulder.

“My one goal in all of this is to keep you safe,” he reminded you. “You make it harder for me than it has to be.”

“Why do you think I’d be safer in the human realm?” you asked, a frown on your face. “I’m safest wherever you are.”

Levi sighed, his lips brushing over your hair.

“You’re a real pain in the ass, Emb.”

You smiled to yourself, feeling a little victorious. Did that mean that Levi was going to let you stay?

The two of you only pulled away when you heard a knock on the door. At first, you were a little suspicious. This was a safehouse for the Scouts, after all. Not many people would know to knock here. Then, it dawned on you.

“Maybe that’s Hange,” you whispered to Levi, feeling relief course through you.

You hurried to the door, Levi following close behind.

Before Levi could argue with you about it, you unlocked and wrenched open the door, a smile on your face and eyes bright at the prospect of reuniting with your friend.

But at the sight of the person who greeted you on the other side of the door, your expression turned into one of frozen shock.

He was holding a ball, the same one you’d handed back to the little boy earlier. From behind him, you could faintly see the boy cowering against the wall of the building across from you.

Neither of you said a word. He looked just as surprised to see you as you were to see him.

It couldn’t be him. It was impossible.

Finally, your voice found you again.

“Reiner?”

But you’d recognize him anywhere.

He looked at you with sad eyes, before his gaze settled upon Levi.

“Reiner,” Levi growled from behind you.

And then, all hell broke loose.

Reiner threw the ball at Levi and grabbed onto you before Levi could attack, pulling you into his strong chest with one arm and dragging you out of the safehouse. With his other arm, he aimed a gun at Levi, and you struggled against his hold with a hand outstretched towards Levi.

“No!” Levi shouted, his eyes wild as he took in the sight of you, trapped in Reiner’s embrace. He was barely paying attention to the fact there was a gun pointed right at him.

“Run, Levi!” you cried, and then shoved Reiner’s arm just as he pulled the trigger. Blind panic coursed through your veins for a moment, wondering if you’d messed up his aim enough to spare Levi. When you saw that he was fine, the bullet having missed him and hitting the exterior of the safehouse instead, you nearly cried with relief.

And Erwin was there now, holding Levi back as Reiner dragged you to where the boy was. You wanted to tell him to run, too, but Reiner had now covered your mouth with his hand, instructing the boy to move out of the way. It was then that you saw that the boy had been hiding a strange drawing on the wall. They looked like…

Sigils.

Your eyes widened, something deep in your bones recognizing what you were looking at immediately.

Everything was happening all at once.

Levi had broken free of Erwin’s grasp and was running to you, and he was seething.

Reiner was grabbing your wrist and lowering his face to the palm of your hand. You gasped in pain when he bit you hard enough to draw blood.

Then, Reiner was pulling your hand towards the sigil.

Levi wasn’t fast enough.

The moment your hand and Reiner’s touched the sigil, it all went black.

read part 6 here

[writertitan]

Hello writertitan, tanny. In the rare chance that you see this I just wanted to say that I love your work and your writing genuinely changed my life. Loud places is probably my favourite piece of literature ever and I have no one to thank but you. Perhaps you’ve completely left this niche of the internet behind and for that you are not to blame. But I hope you know the impact your writing has had and the love it has caused to grow within many people such as myself. Kind regards!

This was such a kind message and did very much make me emotional! It is such a pleasant surprise to know that my fics are being revisited! Loud Places holds a special place in my heart as well, so I’m very glad we can love it together 🤍

You are so sweet to send this!

[writertitan]

are you alive?!?!?

Some guy once famously said, “I’m still alive but I’m barely breathing”

[writertitan]

Perennial // Part 4

a/n: so sorry for the tumblr post delay, but hopefully this update makes it all worth it!

pairing: levi x fem!reader

overall themes: fantasy AU, strangers to lovers, traveling through realms, explicit content

part 4 themes: **NSFW** AND 18+ ONLY!! sexually explicit content the whole way through folks.

read part 3 here

“What do you want?” you mumbled, turning away from Levi to look out of the window again. It was infuriating to even be around him right now.

Levi said nothing at first, merely taking the initiative to lean against the wall beside you. Then, when you wouldn’t even look his way, he sighed, his eyes boring into you.

“You shouldn’t have gone off on your own—” he began, but you cut him off with a groan, moving to slap his arm and try to push him away. He easily dodged your attack, his face composed.

“If you’re just here to keep scolding me, you can leave,” you snapped. “I get it already. You don’t have to drill it into my head that you think I’m a dumb little human.”

“I don’t think you’re dumb. I just think you make dumb choices,” he clarified.

“That’s not exactly better,” you said with a frown, trying to swat at him again. This time, however, he caught your hand midair and squeezed it tight, rendering it immobile.

“I’m trying to protect you,” he said. “You could stand to make that a little easier for me by just doing as I say.”

“Protect me from what?” you whispered, fighting back tears. “I thought Eldians weren’t as dangerous as our human myths made them out to be.”

“It’s not the Eldians out there that I’m worried about,” Levi said. “The Warriors you knew, they’ve got to know you’re missing by now. I’m willing to bet they not only know that you’re here, but that they had something to do with it. They’re looking for you.”

“That’s just a hunch, you don’t know for sure,” you said sharply.

Why were you still defending them, after everything? Were you still in denial?

“I know you were close with them, Emb, but I’ve known them for centuries. I’ve fought them for centuries. They’re not who you think they are,” he said.

You stood up to face him better, all too aware of the fact that he was still gripping onto your hand. Fresh tears, ones of anger and sorrow, threatened to trickle down your face.

“What if you’re the bad guy? Why should I automatically trust you?” you breathed out, your face inches from Levi’s.

Even Levi was starting to lose his composure, but he wasn’t getting angry; he was just as aware of the electric intensity in the room as you were, and it was affecting him like it was affecting you.

“They never told you who they really were, but I haven’t lied to you even once. Maybe I don’t want to answer your billions of questions, or I keep things on a need-to-know basis, but I try to be as honest as possible with you. Doesn’t that count for something?”

He was right.

The sting of knowing you’d been lied to for years came full force, and you bit your bottom lip to keep it from trembling.

You knew why you were still so defensive of your old friends. It was a reason you loathed, but you had to say it out loud.

“I still don’t want to believe that they deceived me. Because once I do accept it…,” you trailed off, and the hand that Levi was squeezing started to squeeze back. Not in malice, but as a way to seek comfort.

“I know,” Levi said, his eyes softening imperceptibly.

He didn’t need you to say the last part out loud.

But you both knew what you wanted to say. Once you accepted the betrayal as fact, everything would change. Instead of viewing them as people who made you feel safe, they would now make you feel scared for your life. All that you knew about trust and security would be questioned, and you would never be the same.

The last rays of sunlight slanted into the room, casting deep shadows on Levi’s face. He looked so certain and determined, and you calmed down a bit just by looking at him. He was the only one who could make you feel safe now.

Levi would protect you. Levi would keep you safe.

Gently, he let go of your hand and you started to reach for your face to wipe the remnants of your tears. To your utter shock, however, Levi beat you to it.

He was a little hesitant and awkward about it, but his thumb wiped a rogue tear from the corner of your eye, the touch as light as a feather. Such a small gesture made your heart flutter nonetheless. You found yourself leaning into his touch, hoping for more. But his hand slipped from your face, down to your shoulder, and he gave it the smallest of squeezes.

Without even thinking, you cupped his jaw with the hand he’d let go of, the feeling of wanting to be close to him suddenly overpowering you. He tensed up a little, clearly a little uncomfortable and unfamiliar with the gesture, but you gave him a shy smile. For a man who was constantly giving you very direct eye contact, he was struggling to meet your gaze now.

“If something happens to me on your watch, Captain Levi…,” you warned, clearly joking, and it worked to lighten the mood. Levi scoffed and rolled his eyes a little, slightly turning his head away from you, but noticeably not pulling away from your touch.

“Nothing is going to happen to you, Embla. I won’t let anything happen to you,” he promised, his eyes still focusing out the window.

The electricity in the room was nearly unbearable now, and it was driving you crazy that Levi wasn’t meeting your gaze, that he wasn't looking at you.

“Levi, look at me,” you whispered.

When he did as you asked, your heart skipped a beat.

Though you tried hard not to, you couldn’t help but graze your thumb over his lips, your touch as feather-light as his had been when he’d wiped your tear away. It was a ghost of a touch, but you felt Levi’s lips respond to it, and you swallowed thickly when you felt him lightly kiss the pad of your thumb. You slid your hand over his neck, instinctively pulling him closer.

The sky outside had dulled into muted blues now that the sun had set and night was approaching, and you knew you’d be hearing and seeing throngs of people soon enough. None of that mattered, though. All that mattered was that you were inching closer and closer to Levi, your mind fuzzy and focused only on him and what it would be like to finally close the space between you.

You’d never seen Levi’s eyes like this before, hazy and soft, and you liked that it was you that had coaxed that from him.

But at the last second, Levi tilted his face up to press his lips to your forehead, and you let a whoosh of air escape your lungs, not realizing you’d been holding your breath.

“I should go,” he murmured against your skin, causing you to frown. “I’ll sleep on the sofa tonight.”

“Don’t go,” you half-whispered, half-pleaded.

You tilted your head up, hoping to find out what it would be like to kiss him, but Levi moved his head back and created more distance between the two of you. It was barely a couple of inches of space, but it felt too much.

“We shouldn’t…get close like this,” he murmured, his thin eyebrows drawn together.

“Why?” The question came out before you even knew that you were asking it.

“I’m not even human, Emb,” he reminded you. “It’s just not possible for humans and Eldians to coexist on any level. Trust me, it’s better this way.”

The rejection stung hard, harder than any other rejection you’d faced before. Maybe it was because this was the first time that you allowed yourself to think of a future outside of the bleak reality you’d been facing back home, but you also felt like it was more than that. You just felt different with Levi, and it was getting clearer and clearer the more time you spent together.

“I don’t care,” you said stubbornly, and you instantly knew that it was true.

Damn every story you’d ever heard about Eldia. There was nothing evil about this place or its inhabitants.

There was nothing bad about Levi.

You didn’t care if the two of you weren’t the same. You didn’t care if you came from two different worlds.

And you were having a hard time believing that Levi did care about any of that.

Outside there were distant noises of people, like you’d heard the night before. You were supposed to draw the curtains and start getting ready for bed, but the energy in the room was still buzzing between you and Levi. The two of you hadn’t broken eye contact yet; Levi looked conflicted and you looked determined.

“If you truly believe what you’re saying, then you can walk out and we won’t go any further than this,” you whispered, feeling strangely out of breath. “But if you’re feeling what I’m feeling right now…stay.”

It nearly broke your heart when Levi wordlessly tore himself away from you, but you forced yourself to accept his answer. You bowed your head so he wouldn’t see your crestfallen expression, turning towards the window where small clusters of people holding lanterns were beginning to come into view and pass you by. You barely saw them, though; you were looking right through them, thinking of how to come to terms with what just happened.

You heard the door open and close, and you bit your lip to keep from tearing up. Your chest felt like it was on fire, that initial sting of rejection now burning you whole.

The electricity in the room hadn’t dissipated either – you thought it would have once Levi left, but it was as potent as ever, reminding you of how intense it had been to be so close to him like that, to touch him and be touched, even if it hadn’t gotten too far.

You had to pull yourself together.

So, you swallowed back your sorrow and took one last look out the window, envious of the smiling faces you saw, and moved back to draw the curtains shut, shrouding you in darkness.

You turned on the kerosene lamp on the bedside table, a warm glow flooding the room, and as you turned to the wardrobe to grab your pajamas, you gasped and froze in place.

“Levi?”

He hadn’t left. Even though you’d heard the door open and then close, he had stayed.

He had stayed.

From the dim light in the room, you could see hesitation still flickering in his eyes, but now it was combined with some other emotion.

Yearning.

It was almost undetectable, but it was there.

As soon as you noticed his presence, he was crossing the room to close the space between you again, and he yanked you into his chest before he angled his head to press a hard kiss to your lips.

It was exhilarating to have him like this, and the kiss alone was enough to have your head spinning. It had begun as such an intense kiss, an urgent kiss, but had gradually melted into something more languid and passionate.

The two of you only broke away to catch your breath, and even then, you were both still finding ways to be connected. Your hands were in Levi’s hair, body pressed against his, and his hands were fumbling around your waist, as if he didn’t know where to put them.

“I couldn’t go,” he admitted, “I can’t stay away from you, even if it’s the right thing.”

You gave a breathless smile as you tugged him towards the bed, your heart racing as the two of you toppled onto it, with him sitting on the edge and you straddling his lap. You couldn’t think straight, couldn’t give him a response other than melding your lips with his again in hopes that he would get the message. To you, this was the right thing. Nothing had ever felt more right.

Your hips pressed into his as you kissed him, the both of you sighing in delight at the wonderful pressure it caused. You could feel Levi stiffen in his pants as you swayed your hips and, in an instant, he grabbed your thighs and nearly threw you onto the bed, with him hovering over you as he began leaving gentle kisses along your neck and jaw.

There was too much space between you again and it made you whine and arch your back, desperate to feel how hard he was.

Levi growled against your skin and followed through with your silent command, his hips pushing down into yours once again, keeping most of his weight on his hips.

You both shed your clothes quickly, until you were only in your undergarments. Your eyes hungrily scanned over Levi’s boxers, hands already itching to yank them down, but you also were very aware of the way his eyes raked over your body from head to toe, taking in every detail. Instinctively, you tried to cover yourself, but Levi was quick to pin your arms down to your sides, his eyes finally meeting yours.

He said nothing, just shook his head, and you melted like putty under his molten gaze as he admired you. When he felt you wouldn’t move your arms, he let go of them, his fingertips tracing over the curves of your breasts, and feeling the soft skin of your inner thigh.

While he familiarized himself with your body, you took the time to take in every detail of him, as well. He was pure muscle, but very lean. His skin was pale as moonlight, and glowed in the light of the kerosene lamp. The angular planes of his face dipped in and out of the shadows as he touched you, and you were so preoccupied with admiring his body, your hands eventually tracing over him the way he’d been doing, that you gasped in surprise when his hands finally went where you needed him the most.

Two of his fingers rubbed delicately between your legs, rubbing you over your soaked panties. Your hips jerked up into his touch, lips parted as a low whine left your throat.

Levi seemed to respond well to the sound, his fingers applying more force.

“Let me hear that again,” he murmured against your neck, his fingers moving in deliberate circles. It did the trick, and you found yourself tilting your head back to let out another breathless groan, feeling like putty in his hands as his head moved down to your chest. His free hand reached up to tug your bra down enough to expose your nipples, and then you felt the delicious warmth of his tongue as he took one in his mouth.

Your hands flew to his hair, fingers buried in the soft strands as his tongue rolled along your nipple, fingers working at your clit. It was like he knew exactly which of your buttons to push in order to make you ignite for him.

You weren’t going to last long at all.

“I’m close,” you warned him in a shaky voice, hips writhing to try and feel more of his hand.

To your complete dismay, Levi lessened the pressure on your clit and released your nipple, kissing his way back up to your lips. You whined against them, arching into his body, but he pinned you down with his weight and took his hand away completely.

“Why’d you stop?” you gasped against his lips, the ache between your legs nearly painful.

“Let me take my time with you,” he responded, and his tone was filled with so much dominance that you immediately acquiesced.

Your hands inched down towards the waistband of his boxers, toying with it until you eventually tugged his boxers down, just enough to let his cock spring out. You gasped when it grazed between your legs, hot and heavy, and your hips bucked on instinct.

But Levi still didn’t give in. His hands were on your hips in an instant, pinning them down while he nipped and sucked at your neck.

You slipped a hand between the two of you, grabbing hold of him, and the growl he gave you made shivers of delight roll down your spine. But you were only able to give him a few slow strokes before he took one of his hands off your hips to grab your hand and still its movements.

Slowly, he helped you guide his cock between your legs, and your entire body ignited when you felt him slide himself over your slit, the motion slow and deliberate. A shaky groan left your throat, and you didn’t stop him when he pried your hand from his length, replacing it with his own to keep sliding himself along your cunt.

The sounds he was making made you throb, little grunts and groans that were only for your ears as he brushed his lips along your face, leaving small and quick kisses wherever he could.

He was absolutely torturing you with his cock, the way he was slowly gliding it between your folds, the head nudging against your clit every so often. He would only briefly prod against your entrance, just to tease you, and then it’d be back to slipping between your folds, gathering your slick. It was too much – but you wanted more.

“Levi,” you whined, “I want it.”

His lips were at your ear, those delightful grunts of his ceasing only so he could rasp, “What do you want?”

Before you could even answer, his cock nudged at your entrance, with more force this time. It wasn’t enough to fully enter you, but it was enough to make your head spin and earn him another one of your low whines that he obviously couldn’t get enough of.

You were getting close again and you had a feeling Levi could pick up on that, because he nearly stopped what he was doing altogether.

You tried to whine but he captured your lips in a passionate kiss, making your mind hazy with pleasure as you got lost in it. He kissed you again, and again, and again, until you were breathless, chest heaving.

As the ache inside of you grew, Levi timed himself well. He was edging you, waiting until the tide of your orgasm quelled before he picked up where he left off, the tip of his cock pushing against your hole again, even more this time.

You could see it in his eyes – he was just as desperate for you, and he couldn’t wait any longer. And you were done with being teased like this.

You gazed at him from under your lashes, hands scratching up his back until they were back in his hair as you whispered to him, “I want you.”

That was his undoing.

You gasped out as Levi finally pushed into you, his head lowering to the crevice of your neck as he fully sheathed himself inside of you. Stars danced across your vision and your legs spread to accommodate him, your arms tightly wound around him to keep him as close as possible. Even now, fully connected, not even an inch of space separating the two of you, you wanted him closer. You were insatiable.

Levi brought his head up to capture your lips in his as he began thrusting into you, mesmerizing you with another breathtaking kiss and the way his hips collided with yours.

You breathed a moan not his mouth, muffled by the kiss, and Levi’s hips snapped roughly into yours. You arched your back, wanting him even deeper than he already was, your head swimming and hazy. There was only one thing on your mind, it was Levi, and wanting more. More, more, more.

It was like he could read your mind. He gave you one last peck before moving onto his knees, which earned a whine out of you – he was suddenly too far, and the sudden space between you wasn’t warm like he was. He immediately quelled you the moment the pads of his middle and forefinger touched your clit, light as a feather at first to coax a particularly desperate moan out of you. Bursts of pleasure flamed through you with each flick at your clit, until he eventually put more pressure on it and began rubbing in time with his thrusts, his free hand sliding slowly up your torso to cup one of your breasts.

You’d never felt like this before. Nobody had ever made you feel like this before. Every sense was heightened, like your soul had woken up. Each thrust that drove his cock deeper into you, each brush of his fingertips on your skin, each kiss he planted on your mouth, they all set you on fire. The pleasure of it all had taken you so much that you couldn’t even speak. You wanted to tell him how he made you feel, you wanted to spur him on, but all that escaped you were your pretty little moans.

And Levi – you never thought you’d see him like this. That composed mask was off, only for you, and you took in the beautiful sight of his hazy eyes and parted lips, those thin brows pulled together as he gave into his lust. Those piercing eyes were on you, moving from your face down to your chest, then further down to watch what he was doing to you between your legs. It was like he couldn’t get enough of you, either. You were both addicted to one another.

The pleasure was building inside of you, making the muscles of your lower stomach tense. You stared at Levi as he stared at you, your pussy throbbing at the way his eyes were concentrated between your legs while he fucked you. Your walls squeezed around his cock involuntarily now that you were close, and Levi let out a surprised groan when he felt you constrict around him. In a flash, his eyes flitted to yours, trapping you in a hungry, lustful gaze. When you saw all that lust in his eyes, how much he wanted you, it pushed you over the edge.

Your back arched up as you came, legs locking around Levi’s hips to pull him closer. He didn’t ease up. Instead, he leaned down to kiss you as he sped up his thrusts, drinking in every sound you made as you rode through your high. Liquid warmth rushed through your veins, making you feel languid and elated.

It was obvious that Levi was close, too. His lips left yours to focus on your neck, planting firm kisses there until, with one final thrust, he bucked into you and muffled his grunt into the curve of your neck. He emptied himself inside you and you could feel it, along with every pulse of his cock. He was merely grinding against you as he finished, getting in a few last sensations of pleasure before letting your orgasms ebb away.

When you both caught your breath, Levi lifted his head and positioned himself to hover over you, his face mere inches from yours as he examined your face.

Neither of you said a word, but you didn’t want to break the silence, either. All you wanted to do was lay there and stare at Levi, and memorize the way he was looking at you with so much quiet fondness and gentleness. You knew that these looks were private, something only for you to see, and that he’d never be vulnerable like this out in the world. You’d have to savor these moments.

You angled your head up to peck his lips, just a quick and playful one, and it seemed to snap the two of you out of your trance.

“That was…,” you started, but trailed off, not able to find the words. Instead, you kissed him again, hoping to convey your feelings that way.

Levi pressed his forehead to yours for a moment, the two of you savoring your closeness one last time before he pulled out of you. Once he was comfortably situated next to you in bed, you curled up into his side, like you’d done the night before. Only this time, Levi had his arm securely around you, pulling you closer to him. You stared at his profile, admiring his strong jaw and high cheekbones, not caring if you were ogling. Even though his eyes were closed, you knew he could feel your eyes on him.

“It’s rude to stare,” he murmured, eyes still closed.

“Sorry,” you said bashfully, ducking your head into his chest.

Levi gave your arm a small squeeze, and you closed your eyes as well as your mind began to go a mile a minute.

You’d never experienced anything close to that before. Not that sex hadn’t been enjoyable before, but…this was different. Levi had taken you to highs you didn’t think you could reach.

Was this the only time it would ever happen? The thought nearly made you feel sick. What if you went home tomorrow? What if this was the only time you’d be able to be with Levi like this?

Your stomach was twisting into knots.

This couldn’t be it. Not seeing Levi ever again, not being able to see what could happen between the two of you…it was almost painful to think about.

He had started tracing his fingertips along your skin, his breathing slow and steady, like he was about to go to sleep. You’d never felt safer.

This felt like home. This peace you felt in Eldia, the tug you felt towards Levi, it couldn’t be a coincidence. Maybe your “accidental” appearance in Eldia hadn’t been such an accident.

You let a hand glide over Levi’s stomach, feeling the taut muscles there as you whispered out your wish.

“I want to stay.”

read part 5 here

[writertitan]

Perennial // Part 3

a/n: i hope everyone's new year has been so lovely! 2024 has got a lil kick to it.

pairing: levi x fem!reader

overall themes: fantasy AU, strangers to lovers, traveling through realms, explicit content

part 3 themes: mental breakdown from reader, hange introduction, some hurt/comfort

read part one here

read part two here

Hange wasted no time in stepping away and kept the door wide open for the two of you to step inside, and you immediately took in your surroundings.

Hange’s house was a disaster. Papers, shoes, empty cartons, and other items were scattered all over the floor. Clothes and quilts were draped over every possible piece of furniture, and candles were everywhere. They’d been lit so many times that pools of hardened wax surrounded the candlesticks, and the wax clung to various things, whatever the candle had been set on, really.

“This place is a mess,” you muttered, and Levi seemed to have the same sentiments.

“Your pigsty is as disgusting as I’ve ever seen it, Four Eyes,” Levi quipped, his monotone voice holding an edge to it. “Don’t you ever clean?”

“I haven’t really had the time. You know I’ve had much bigger fish to fry,” Hange answered, voice bubbly despite Levi’s cutting words.

Then, Hange turned to you, glasses gleaming as they scanned you from head to toe.

“She’s Embla,” Levi said, and Hange’s eyes glittered behind their glasses.

“That’s right,” they breathed, eyes wide like saucers. Then, under their breath, asked, “And how the heck did you get your butt over here?”

“I have no idea how I got here,” you admitted, standing a little straighter under Hange’s scrutiny. “That’s why we’re here. Levi said you might be able to help get me home.”

“Hmm, did he? I don’t know how much help I’ll be. This may be something more up Erwin’s alley,” they said, though they looked completely saddened to have to admit it.

“You’re the goddamned scientist, Hange. Are you really telling me you’re willing to pass this up to Erwin?” Levi said, grey eyes hard as ice. Clearly, there was a lot of complicated history there that was going unspoken between the two of them.

At that, Hange tilted their head, considering. Outside, you could hear the first waves of families coming back to their homes. Young children were laughing, and the adults were chatting animatedly, though you couldn’t make out specifics.

“On second thought, I call dibs! Erwin’s got a brilliant mind, but you won’t have half as much fun with him as you will with me, Embla! It’ll be nice to drop everything and focus on you,” Hange declared.

Levi seemed to loosen up a little, and then he turned to you, arms folded over his chest.

“Any more questions you want to ask, direct them to Hange. Four Eyes is the only person I can think of who asks more questions than you do, and they’ll be happy to be on the receiving end for once.”

You glared at him, not appreciating the little dig, but you did light up a little bit at the thought of someone finally being excited to offer insight into this realm and quell your curiosities.

While Levi went to make some tea, Hange guided you to their study, which was even messier than the living space of their home. Hange merely shoved some stacks of papers and books off a chair for you to sit in, and they immediately grabbed a very big, very old book off a bookshelf behind you, sitting at the desk that sat in the study and opening up to flick through some pages.

“Do you really have the power to send me home? Like, a spell or something?” you asked, hands in your lap.

At that, Hange let out a wild, loud laugh, going as far as slapping their knee.

“Oh, you kill me. I don’t have the power to do anything like that – it’s a wonder you’re even here! You really are our own little Embla. I can certainly try and figure out how to get you back, though. You’ll just have to share your story. Spare me no details, please!”

You were about to, but then you stopped, giving Hange a curious look.

“How come you both refer to me as Embla?” you asked. “I’ve pretty much gotten used to being called that by Levi, but I don’t understand why you both seem to like referring to me as that name so much. I feel like I’m missing out on some inside joke.”

Hange gave a small smile, leaning back in their seat.

“Embla isn’t exactly a name…it’s more of a very old term.”

You suddenly remembered when you’d originally asked Levi, and he’d given that strange response.

It’s what you are.

“What does it mean?” you pressed.

“Despite an entire war happening between humans and Eldians, only a handful of human men ever crossed into our realm. There’s no record of a regular human woman crossing over. That’s what you are. You’re the first woman to step into our realm, the Embla. It’s significant to us, but I promise to tell you more about it some other time, if you’re interested,” Hange explained. “For now, let’s get back to you. Tell me everything. Remember, spare me no details!”

And so you did.

You let it all out, starting with the fact that you were very sad prior to the gas station, and how much your life was changing, and how you’d felt compelled to open that door, and how terrifying it was to suddenly be in a different world and not knowing, and how Levi had helped you and was constantly teetering from being so gentle to entirely made of stone.

It was therapeutic, spilling your guts like this. And Hange was a great listener, despite Levi warning you that they loved asking questions. Not once did they interrupt, and they even seemed completely enraptured in your story.

“Wow,” Hange breathed when you finished. “Quite a journey so far indeed. But I would love for you to go back a little bit. You told me about your friend who was helping you with your move. What was her name again?”

“Oh, Pieck? What about her?” you questioned.

Hange’s eyes flashed, as if recognizing the name.

“How long have you known her?” they asked.

“For a few years now. I met her when I first moved into my apartment. She’s one of my closest friends now,” you answered. “I’m confused on why you’re so curious about her.”

You were starting to feel defensive again, even a little cagey. It was one thing to spill your guts about yourself, it was another thing entirely to speak about someone else, especially a close friend.

Before Hange could even give you an answer, you spoke up again.

“Pieck doesn’t have anything to do with this. I just mentioned her because you said not to spare any details. I don’t want to involve her in this,” you said, trying to keep your voice firm.

“On the contrary, my new friend. She has more to do with this than you think,” Hange said, their tone light despite saying such a controversial thing. “Let’s go meet up with Levi again. I think he needs to hear this, if he hasn’t already. Which I don’t think he has, otherwise he would have brought you over to me a lot sooner.”

Your heart raced in your chest as you followed Hange out of the study and into the living room, where Levi had cleaned up a little bit and was sipping on some tea on a couch you could now see. He looked up from under his lashes when the two of you appeared again, though he didn’t move.

“The Marleyans are good on their word, Levi. Sounds like they made it over to the human realm. Our friend Embla here told me that Pieck Finger is apparently a very good friend,” Hange announced, slumping down into an armchair that had also been cleared of Hange’s mess.

Levi froze then, and you could see that his grip tightened on his mug as he processed the news. His eyes flashed to you, scrutinizing you for a long moment, before he eventually moved to set his mug down on the coffee table in front of the couch, also recently cleaned. Damn, he worked fast. You hadn’t realized he was something of a neat freak.

But Levi’s cleaning abilities weren’t really at the front of your brain.

You were starting to tremble as you struggled to process the possibility of Pieck being involved with Eldians somehow. From the little you managed to gather, it didn’t sound like Levi or Hange were very fond of her.

“Do you know Pieck?” you asked feebly, struggling to keep upright.

Did she really have something to do with your sudden arrival in Eldia? It seemed so impossible. Then again, nothing was impossible anymore.

Instead of Hange answering you, it was Levi.

“She belongs to a faction of Eldians that we call Marleyans,” he said, his eyes trained on you. “About a hundred years ago, some Eldians split off into their own territory, called Marley. They’re a dangerous lot with very dangerous beliefs. I can’t believe they’re actually trying to pull their mission off.”

Mission? What mission? Why were they dangerous? What was so dangerous about your sweet friend Pieck?

You wanted to ask these questions so badly, but they simply wouldn’t come out. You were frozen in place, much like yesterday, but this time without the risk of your very soul ripping itself out of your physical body.

Pieck was Eldian?

You thought back to all your memories with her. She’d never really brought up the myths at all during the time you’d known her. You had to be fair, though; there’d never been an occasion to bring stories of Eldia up. Nowadays, in the human world, Eldia was hardly talked about, save for some podcasts and college essays.

But the most frightening possibility of all was weighing heavy on your heart. Were Hange and Levi insinuating that Pieck had befriended you for a reason? Had your years of friendship been a lie, a farce?

But why? You weren’t Eldian. Why was this happening to you?

“You look a little green,” Hange noted, and you had no response.

Your bottom lip quivered and your knees finally buckled under your weight, sending you to the floor. You curled up into a ball, leaning against a wall for support. Here it was, the mental breakdown you’d been anticipating.

You hid your face in your hands, ashamed at the fact you were acting like this in front of Hange and Levi, but you couldn’t stop even if you tried. A sob escaped and you allowed yourself to let go and let your emotions take over, the sadness unbearable.

Your surroundings disappeared and it was just you in a void, no company other than your fear and misery. It felt like there was no coming back from this. You felt so untethered and couldn’t find it within yourself to cope with all these changes.

All the loss you faced back home had nearly been too much. You’d been hanging by a thread, and nobody was there for you except for Pieck. She’d been the one holding you together.

Those problems had seemed so far away when you’d crossed into the Eldian realm, like a fog had settled in your brain. It had made you focus on the here and now, with only one goal: get back home.

Now, it was like the fog had lifted. You had to deal with your problems in the human realm, as well as your problems in this realm. Maybe they were more enmeshed than you realized.

Pieck wasn’t here to hold you together. Nobody was going to be there for you now. You were alone.

You were all alone.

“Hey.”

You jumped when you heard Levi’s voice and felt a hand on your shoulder, and you were surprised at how quick his actions made the void around you disappear.

You lifted your head and opened your eyes, taking in your surroundings between your ragged breaths.

No vast emptiness or darkness.

Right. You were in Hange’s home, in the living room.

But you were far away from home.

You looked at Levi, expecting to see steely grey eyes and a set jaw, but your heart thudded when you were met with a gentle gaze underneath thin brows that were knit together in concern.

“Just take a deep breath,” he whispered, his hand still on your shoulder. He even gave it a small rub, which admittedly did help loosen you up.

You did as he said, taking a deep but incredibly shaky breath.

“Hold it for a second,” Levi instructed, and you again did as told, holding your breath until Levi eventually instructed to exhale.

The air whooshed out of you, and some of your fears did as well.

“Can you stand?” Levi asked. “Let’s get you to the couch where it’s more comfortable.”

But you were still a trembling mess. You tried to stand but to no avail, eventually dropping back to the ground as another shameful sob left you.

“I can’t,” you choked out, not daring to look at Levi.

“Can’t what? Can’t stand? That’s fine. We’ll just sit here until you can,” Levi said.

True to his word, he got himself situated next to you on the floor, his shoulder bumping against yours.

“Not just about standing,” you eventually said, trying again to express how you felt. “I just…can’t. I can’t deal. I can’t do anything. I think my mind is finally breaking.”

Levi was quiet but stayed where he was, and it meant more to you than you could express to him in your state. You still felt like you were spiraling and there was no one to catch you, but you felt a little better knowing you weren’t totally alone, even if Levi didn’t consider you a friend.

Hange, as you’d come to find out, had gone to the kitchen to make you some supper and some tea, which you ate on the floor with Levi never leaving your side.

“I’ll be in my study,” they said softly, offering a little smile. “I’m going to look through some old texts that may point us in the right direction. I think to figure out how you crossed over to Eldia, we’ll need to figure out how the Marleyans could have crossed over to the human realm. You should rest for the night. You can help me out tomorrow.”

You merely nodded in response and sighed deeply when the door to the study opened and closed, leaving you alone with Levi in the living room. He cleaned up after you were done with supper, the only time he left your side, but he was back in no time.

If you were being honest with yourself, his presence was very calming. Despite him sometimes being a complete dick, he also just felt…safe. And that was something you hadn’t felt in a long, long time.

“Hange has a guest room. It was filthy, but I did my best to clean it up. You can use it and I’ll take the couch,” Levi said. “Think you can stand now that you’ve had some food in you?”

“I think so,” you whispered through the knot in your throat, but your wobbly legs barely worked as you tried to stand on them.

Instead of making a snide remark or getting angry with you, Levi wordlessly took it upon himself to scoop you into his arms, saving you the trouble of having to walk.

The suddenness of it and his gracefulness in lifting you up and carrying you left you breathless. You watched him with wide eyes, lips slightly parted, and you clung to him for dear life.

The window in the guest room was big, silvery moonlight pouring in and illuminating the room. It was a simple room, not much in it but a bed and a wardrobe. As Levi gently set you down on the bed, panic shot through you the moment he tried to pull away.

Your hand shot out to grip his wrist as hard as you could, your eyes pleading as they met Levi’s inquisitive grey ones.

“Please don’t go,” you pleaded with him, voice just above a whisper. “Will you stay?”

“You want me to stay?” he asked, as if not fully comprehending.

“I want you to stay,” you breathed out. To further confirm it, you shifted until there was enough room on the bed for the both of you, an invitation for Levi to lie down with you. It may have been a trick of the moonlight, but you were certain that he looked a little nervous.

“Are you afraid I’m gonna compromise your purity or something?” you joked, offering a weak smile.

Levi gave you a deadpan stare but was more confident as he moved to lie down next to you on the bed.

“Seems like you’re feeling better if you’ve got jokes,” he remarked, his eyes staring pointedly at the ceiling.

But you were looking at him and you didn’t take your eyes off him.

“Thank you for staying,” you whispered. “Thank you for helping me.”

At that, Levi turned to look at you, scanning over your face.

“I’m sorry about Pieck,” he said.

Your heart sank at the thought of her, but you shook your head lightly, pushing her to the back of your mind once more.

“I’m sorry you’re stuck with me,” you sighed, tears welling in your eyes. When you felt them sting at your eyes, you turned your head away from Levi, staring at the ceiling like he had been doing before.

“Emb. Look at me.”

You turned your head again to look at him, a little embarrassed.

“It’s okay to cry and to be upset,” Levi reminded you. “Don’t try and hide it from me. Don’t hide it from anyone.”

“I’m weak,” you lamented, but Levi gave you a stern look.

“That isn’t weakness,” he said.

“I bet you never get emotional like this,” you countered, but Levi’s face remained composed.

“Stop comparing yourself. Just let yourself be who you are,” he said.

The words struck a chord in you.

It was true, you were constantly comparing yourself, looking for yourself in other people. Nobody had ever clocked that about you so fast, and what’s more, called you out on it. The urge to cry had left you, tears drying up, and you even felt a little elated.

You couldn’t help yourself. In one quick motion, you were nestled up against Levi’s side, smiling a little at how it had made him tense up. But he didn’t pull away.

That feeling of safety overwhelmed you now. The closer you were to Levi, the safer you felt.

You shifted a bit to get comfortable and some hair fell over your eyes, but you didn’t mind. Fed and exhausted from the day’s events, you felt sleep coming quick.

“Good night, Levi,” you yawned, eyes closing.

The last thing you registered was the sensation of Levi’s fingertips brushing the hair from your eyes.

----------

You awoke the next morning to the sound of people outside, pieces of your dream still flitting through your mind.

With a big yawn and an even bigger stretch of your limbs, you felt a little more awake. Turning to the window, you could see that sunrise was imminent, but only tiny rays of sunlight had begun to peak over the horizon. Crowds of villagers were hurrying along the streets, most likely to get to their temple where they’d be resting for the day.

As you stretched again, it was then that you realized Levi wasn’t around. Strange, the way your heart sank. Part of you really believed he would stay the whole night with you.

You shook those thoughts out of your head and straightened yourself out, making a mental note to ask Hange where you could clean yourself up. As you left the guestroom, the smell of eggs and toasted bread filled the air, and your stomach twisted with hunger.

“Smells good,” you complimented to no one in particular, heading over to the kitchen to see none other than Levi in the kitchen, frying up another batch of eggs.

“Levi?” you asked incredulously.

“Good morning,” he said flatly, his eyes on the pan full of eggs. “Hange’s still asleep. How many eggs do you want?”

“Two. No, three!” you said, excited at the prospect of real food. Your snack stash was getting low, and you hadn’t really been fond of the food Levi had given you in his little mountain hideout.

Levi slid some eggs onto a plate for you, and before you could thank him, you jumped at a loud screech that filled the air. Moments later, Hange was racing into the kitchen, hair a mess and glasses half off their face, like you’d seen yesterday.

“Man, oh man, do I smell eggs?!” they exclaimed.

Levi clicked his tongue in dismay as Hange barreled into him and scooped up most of the eggs to pile onto their plate, only leaving a couple left.

“You’re so disgusting,” Levi sneered, but he didn’t retaliate any further. He took the remaining eggs and some toast, sitting across from you at the table while Hange chose to sit right next to you.

“How’d you sleep?” Hange asked you between bites of their breakfast, and you gave a polite smile, sneaking a glance at Levi.

“Very well, thanks,” you answered, tearing a piece of toast to munch on. “Hange, do you not celebrate the Three Nights?”

“I see Levi’s been telling you about our customs! Very moving,” Hange cackled, fixing their glasses before turning to look at you. “Most Eldians celebrate the Three Nights, it’s true, but us Scouts have too much on our plate right now to be able to take the time to alter our schedules like that.”

Scouts.

Levi had mentioned something about Scouts before, when you’d moved through the verse mirror together.

It can be taxing to move through the verse mirror for even the most experienced Scout.

“Scouts?” you asked, but you caught the way Levi was glaring at Hange as you asked, like they’d divulged too much information.

Why did he want to keep you in the dark so badly?

Hange looked like they wanted to say more, but one look at Levi told them not to.

“We’ll talk about it another time,” they told you dismissively, then strategically changed the subject. “I may as well have been partaking in the celebration last night, though. I hardly got any sleep while I was looking through all my textbooks to figure out how you could have gotten here. My hypothesis of the Marleyan Warriors targeting you specifically in the human realm is getting stronger and stronger the more I research.”

Marleyan Warriors.

Warriors and Scouts. There had to be some correlation.

Was Levi a Scout?

You tried to sneak a glance at him, briefly watching as he took a sip of his tea, and you looked away before he could catch you watching him.

Your thoughts made their way to Pieck, and it made your heart hurt. Was she a Warrior?

And why would she be targeting you?

You were slowly losing your appetite the more you danced around these thoughts. You shook your head slightly, brows furrowed, as if the physical shaking would remove the thoughts from your head.

You could also feel Levi’s eyes on you as you did so, but this time you chose to ignore him and forced yourself to take another bite of food.

Hange didn’t wait for anyone else to speak up and continued talking.

“After breakfast let’s go back to my study, Embla. I want as much background on your history with Pieck as you can give me. I’m almost sure that there’s going to be pieces to the puzzle sprinkled in, things that you, as a human, probably didn’t think twice about.”

The thought of hashing out your past, knowing you’d be bringing up so much of your pain, made you physically ill.

“Okay,” you whispered, eyes cast down at your eggs.

You swallowed thickly, pushing those dark thoughts back, and focused on the now uncomfortable task of finishing your plate.

Again, you felt those piercing grey eyes on you, but you didn’t meet his gaze. As you finished your breakfast and brought your plate to the kitchen sink, you turned to Hange, who was doing the same.

“Do you have a bathroom I could use? I really need to take a bath and get cleaned up,” you said, tugging at your clothes. “And maybe I could get some laundry done so I can wash these clothes?”

“Let me show you to the bathroom!” Hange said, tugging you along.

You walked past the guestroom and study, all the way down the hall until you reached the door to the bathroom, which Hange swung open.

“Go ahead and get cleaned up in there. There are already some charms in place to keep the water hot and whatnot. Set your clothes outside the door and I’ll work on those for you!” they said. “They’ll be spotless by the time you’re done.”

“Oh, Hange, no, you don’t have to wash my clothes—” you started, but Hange let out a cackle, head thrown back as they laughed.

“I forget how hard things can be for humans sometimes. You guys really don’t have a speck of magic left in your realm, huh? Clean clothes are a simple charm, too. Most cleaning can be done that way,” they explained.

From behind Hange, Levi appeared, his brow raised in annoyance.

“Exactly. Which is why it boggles the mind that you choose to live like a pig,” he said to Hange, arms folded over his chest. “Maybe take a bath after Embla is done.”

Hange rolled their eyes and waved their hand in Levi’s face, clearly so used to his moods that they never once looked perturbed at his attitude.

“Have fun in there!” they told you, slamming the door in your face.

You sighed and peeled off your clothes, catching a glance of yourself in the mirror as you did so.

“Boy, I look rough,” you complained quietly, leaning in closer to inspect yourself even more.

Your hair was a mess, almost as messy as Hange’s, and your skin was dull and clearly in need of moisturizing. A whiff under your armpit made you scrunch up your nose, and you hurriedly folded up your clothes and opened the door just enough to slide the pile outside before closing it again and locking it.

The pipes were very old school, but you figured them out soon enough and watched the water fill up the tub, steam rising from the tub and soothing you.

Eventually it was filled enough to get in, and you fiddled with the pipes again until the water stopped spouting from the spigot.

An audible moan escaped you as you lowered yourself into the bath, your body relaxing with the warm water. Hange had a nice collection of soaps and bath salts and oils, and you helped yourself to them, dropping some salts and oils in while you decided which soap you were going to use. You used a small, rolled up towel as a guard between your neck and the edge of the tub so you could get comfortable, and as soon as you got situated, you closed your eyes and let yourself relax. There were no thoughts allowed – you just wanted to let yourself feel the warmth of the bathwater, feel the way the salts moved in the bath, smell the lovely scents of the bath oils, and forego everything else.

You’d put in a few drops of lavender oil, and it calmed you down heavily, nearly lulling you back to sleep. Snippets of the dream you’d had came back, and you allowed yourself to indulge in those false memories, mostly because Levi had been the center character in your dream.

You’d fallen asleep easily last night, comforted by his warmth and firm body next to yours. The scent of him had permeated your dreams, and you’d dreamed of him in a forest of fir trees as it rained down on the two of you. Such a lush, fresh scent. In your dream, he’d looked sad, and he was standing far away from you. And you remembered calling out to him, hand outstretched, unable to touch him. It all felt so familiar.

A knock on the door made you slowly open your eyes, half expecting it to be Levi. The thought made your heart skip a beat and your body heat up despite the already warm bath. Just the image of him coming in and raking his eyes over your bare body was enough to make you squirm a little.

You smiled a little when you heard Hange’s voice on the other side of the door, ignoring the disappointment that overtook your heart.

“Your clothes are clean!” they announced, and that was that.

Charms worked fast and well, it seemed. You remembered yesterday, how much cleaner the house looked after spending just a little bit of time in Hange’s study. You’d surmised that Levi was just a quick and diligent cleaner, but you had failed to remember just how different this realm was compared to yours.

There was magic and sorcery and lush landscapes and strange but delightful people. It surprised you just how wrong the myths were. Eldians looked just like humans. They had their own customs and their own stories and their own lives. Many stories said they were shifters and could shift into Titan form at will, but those same stories made it sound like Eldians were constantly in Titan form, just waiting for the opportunity to catch a lost human and eat them for supper. The entire time you’d been in this world which, granted, hadn’t been that long, you hadn’t felt the immobilizing fear that human myths often talked about. There was nothing sinister here. How ironic. The place where you should have felt cruelty and loss and fear was not at all what it seemed, and the place you should have felt safe and at peace was the place that held all that cruelty and malice. The human world had a lot of work to do.

Maybe it was a mistake to go back.

No.

You couldn’t think like that. There was still so much to do at home. There was still so much grief to process and so many situations to resolve. There was still so much life to live there.

And one thing seemed to ring true. In your world, there was no magic. In this world, magic was rampant. Eldians had surely taken it all and never given any back.

The thought soured your mood a little bit. But hell, it kept your bath warm while you sulked.

-----

By the time you got out, got dressed, and made yourself presentable, it was late morning. Levi was nowhere to be found and Hange was in their study, perusing through books.

“Where’s Levi?” you asked, sitting in the chair you’d sat in last time.

“He took off to get something is what he said,” Hange said distractedly, their eyes never leaving the page they were reading. “He’s always so vague. Getting him to reveal details about anything is like pulling teeth.”

“I thought it was just me,” you grumbled, but felt relief at the thought Levi was like this with everyone.

Hange bookmarked their page and shut their book, which closed with a heavy thud, and then their attention was on you at once.

“I’m sorry to have to ask this of you, but we need to delve into your human life in more detail, especially around Pieck. It sounds like a sore subject, but we can take breaks,” Hange said.

You thought back to yesterday, the way you were spiraling, and the thought of risking it again today was horrific. But Hange was right, it needed to be done. If you wanted to go home, it needed to be done. You couldn’t be scared of things anymore.

“I’ll guide you through it,” Hange promised. “Let’s start with how you met. You mentioned it was a few years back? At your…what did you call it?”

“Apartment,” you clarified, your gaze on the wall, but staring at nothing. In your mind’s eye, you were looking at the drawing of the flower on the top of your door. “I was just barely moving in, and she was thinking about moving into that same building. We became fast friends and she joked that meeting me that day sealed the deal for her. She moved in with…she had – she had a roommate.”

This was where it was going to get really hard.

You swallowed thickly, feeling that knot start to form in your throat.

Would you even be able to get all of this out? It was still so fresh. Even just the thought of having to say it all out loud had your heart sputtering and your mind spinning. Tears stung at your eyes as you tried to think of the best way to say everything.

“We can take a break, Embla…,” Hange offered, their eyes full of concern, but you shook your head firmly, your hands gripping the edge of your seat.

“No,” you breathed out, “I have to admit it eventually. I have to remind myself that it’s real.”

Hange waited patiently, still as a statue as you collected yourself.

“Pieck moved in with a roommate. One of her closest friends she’s known since childhood. His name was Porco, but he went by Pock. I became friends with him, too, and then we started hanging out with one of his best friends…Reiner.”

The knot in your throat was loosening up. Suddenly, it felt like you couldn’t get it out fast enough. You were so terrified that you wouldn’t physically be able to even say the words, but now it was like you had to say it all, and tell someone, anyone, about your anguish.

“Reiner and I started dating,” you revealed. “We were all inseparable. Reiner and I were actually going to move in together. I lived alone, so he was going to move in with me, I should say. We were always all hanging out at my apartment…”

You took in a shaky breath, feeling that void start to form around you again. You tried to push it back.

“He died, Hange. Reiner died.”

You didn’t know if you’d ever actually said it out loud.

Reiner was dead.

Tears were coming in full force now. Squeezing your eyes shut, you struggled to piece together the rest of the story for her.

“I lost everything when he died. I just couldn’t function anymore. I couldn’t go to work anymore, and I had to move out of that apartment because it held too much of him in there. I had to leave. I just moved out of that place, right before I got here. I was going to start fresh, somewhere new. It’s been nearly eight months and I just feel…lost,” you finished, hanging your head.

It was quiet for a few minutes. As much as it had hurt to reveal such a painful recent history, it also felt strangely good.

Finally, you opened your eyes to meet Hange’s gaze. They held a very gentle look in their eyes and gave you a small smile when you looked at them, but there was something beyond that gentleness.

Hange knew you had noticed it and spoke up before you could ask any questions.

“Emb…I know all of them. Pieck, Pock, Reiner…they’re all Marleyans,” they revealed. “They’ve all been missing for over three years now.”

At first, it was hard to process what Hange was saying. It didn’t sound real.

“All of them?” you choked out, your entire body slowly filling with dread.

“Yes. All of them. Even Reiner,” Hange whispered, though it sounded as though they really didn’t want to say it. “And we believe they all hold the Power of the Titan.”

There it was again, that strange phrase. Power of the Titan. Try as you might, you couldn’t recall ever hearing that in your human myths.

But that wasn’t what was concerning you right now.

All you could think about was Reiner.

Reiner had been Eldian. Marleyan. He wasn’t human. He had lied to you, and Pieck and Pock had lied, too. They were liars and they had picked you for whatever reason. They were all a part of something that you hadn’t been privy to. It all felt like some big joke suddenly.

“Why?” you asked, mostly to yourself, but Hange hummed and shook their head.

“I hate to say it, I really do, because I know they’re your friends. But they sought you out for a reason. And we have to get to the bottom of it,” they said.

You knew Hange was right. Logically, it was a solid point of reasoning. Still, those feelings of denial dredged up in you, and you almost wanted to get angry.

Hange was wrong. They had to be wrong. Your friends wouldn’t betray you like this.

You thought back to all your memories together. They had all been there for you in ways nobody else ever had been.

You thought back to Pieck making you spill your wine on your carpet when she hugged you too hard.

And Pock, drawing that stupid flower on your doorframe because he didn’t know how to draw mistletoe and he was hellbent on making you and Reiner finally kiss each other, before you got together.

And Reiner.

Your bottom lip trembled.

Reiner, buying your groceries for you whenever you were too tired.

Reiner, orchestrating your first ever surprise birthday party. Nobody had ever done that for you before.

Reiner, the man who died two weeks before moving in with you.

Reiner, the man who had been lying to you.

“I think I need a break,” you admitted, wiping furiously at your eyes.

“I’ll go make you some smokeroot tea,” Hange offered, but you were out of the study before they could even finish their sentence.

You stalked back to the guestroom, throwing the door open and immediately sinking into the bed. Your entire body was trembling and you feared you were on the verge of another breakdown.

“I’m so weak,” you mumbled to yourself, crossing your arms over your torso, as if hugging yourself.

You hated being like this. It often seemed like you felt all these emotions and there was nowhere to put them. You just had to feel them and juggle them all at once.

You didn’t even notice when the door opened. Only when you heard the footsteps did you tense up, thinking it was Hange with some tea.

But when someone sat at the edge of the bed, you finally lifted your head to take a peek, surprised to see Levi there.

“Hange told me,” was all he said, and you let your tears flow again.

“I don’t want it to be true,” you confessed, peering at Levi through your tear-soaked lashes.

He said nothing, but he kept his gaze on you, a mask of calm over his face.

“I’m sorry,” he finally said, and you just shrugged, sitting up a bit.

You remembered how safe you’d felt with him last night, the closer you were to him.

And again, without thinking it through, you pressed yourself into his side, your arms wrapping around him.

You thought it would be strange, allowing yourself to be close to another man after Reiner’s death, even in a non-romantic sense, but that hadn’t really been the case with Levi. He had helped you so much, and you had never felt like you were in danger with him around. Plus, you were just so drawn to him. You had been since the moment you’d met him. You weren’t expecting Levi to offer any sort of comfort, other than letting you cry on him, but you were pleasantly surprised to feel his arm wrap around your shoulders, keeping you close to him.

The tears dried up a little quicker after that, but even after, you stayed like that with Levi. You listened to the steady beat of his heart, basked in his surprising warmth, and let yourself bask in the smell of him, that soothing scent of rainy pines and tea leaves.

Part of you felt it was wrong to be like this with Levi, for many reasons. He wasn’t even human, for starters, he was Eldian. You were still distraught over the death of the man you’d loved. The two of you hardly knew each other. So why did it feel so natural?

But it couldn’t be romantic feelings. That would be insanity.

Yet, the thought of it not being romantic also made you sad.

“I’m a mess,” you muttered under your breath, not really thinking Levi could hear you.

“You’re not,” he murmured back.

In a bout of courage, you reached up to grab his hand that dangled off your shoulder. He didn’t pull away.

------------

Hange hadn’t needed any more information from you after you’d spilled your guts about what had been happening to you back in the human world.

After Levi had comforted you, the two of you had left the guestroom to have some tea and let Hange do some digging.

“Where did you go off to today?” you asked Levi, outstretched on Hange’s sofa.

“Had to get something,” was his reply, which made you a little upset. Always so cagey.

“Get what?”

Levi shot you an annoyed look over his mug, and you could tell he was debating whether or not to even answer you.

“Will you ever stop asking questions?” he grumbled.

“Will you ever start answering them?” you shot back.

His mood swings were starting to give you whiplash. He was so caring and helpful, but also a complete dick sometimes.

Levi gave you a hard stare and you met it as best as you can, lifting your chin a little, and he finally grunted and put his mug down.

“I went to grab some things to work a new charm,” he revealed. “And before you ask, I’m not going to tell you what the charm is. Hange’s got their suspicions about something, and so I went and grabbed things I knew we would need.”

You pouted a little but made do with his half-answer, taking another sip of your tea.

“Is it going to take me home?” you asked. “Today?”

Levi couldn’t answer, however. Hange was bounding into the living room before you could really process their quickness, interrupting you and Levi, and you could see a glint in their eyes.

“I think I’m finally getting somewhere!” they exclaimed, hands in the air.

“Care to share?” Levi asked, an eyebrow raised.

Hange took their sweet time, though, choosing to pour themselves a mug of tea and plop down on a chair before answering.

“I believe they’re using a very old conjuring technique,” they said, the steam of their tea fogging up their glasses. “This won’t make much sense to you, Emb, but Levi, follow along. The Marleyans are practicing sigillary.”

Si-what-ary?

You honed in on Levi’s reaction, the way he tensed up, a storm cloud rolling over his eyes.

You were honestly getting frustrated. Here you were, divulging all sorts of information, and you weren’t getting any back. It was very kind of Hange and Levi to be helping you, a strange human in their realm, but you were getting a little fed up with being so in the dark.

“Damn it,” Levi sighed. “I guess we should have guessed that.”

“Can someone please fill me in?” you cut in, nearly slamming your mug down on the coffee table. “I don’t know if you guys are trying to protect me from something or what, but I need to know what this is all about. What exactly did I accidentally get involved in?”

Levi and Hange exchanged glances, but you sighed impatiently, looking between the two of them.

“Please tell me,” you begged, sitting up straight. “I need to know what’s going on.”

“Alright,” Hange conceded. “I guess that’s fair. You’ll need to know as much as you can, just in case.”

You nodded once, indicating that you were ready, all while ignoring the glare Levi shot Hange's way.

“We mentioned that some Eldians created their own sect, the Marleyans. Well, Marley was founded upon a very specific belief, that belief being that Ymir, and especially her daughters, should not have sealed the gates to the human world. This is because they believe that we not only left behind some magic in the human realm, but also that…” Hange took a breath before continuing. “Marleyans believe that Eldians can turn into mortals, and mortals can turn into Eldians. It’s very powerful magic and Eldians believe it is impossible. Really, the only human to have ever become Eldian is Ymir, and that was purely an accident. The reason all of this is important background is because that was also around the last time sigillary was practiced.”

You blinked a few times, trying to absorb what Hange had just said.

Ymir becoming an Eldian, the first Titan, was an accident?

“W-what’s sigillary?” you stammered out. It was better to push through and get as much insight as possible before beginning your real questions.

“Sigillary is what humans used to harness their magic. It’s what turned Ymir into the first Titan and Eldian,” Hange said.

Levi’s eyes were on you, and it felt like they were boring a hole into you.

“Levi mentioned that humans have been…retelling our history,” Hange spoke up after a minute, cocking their head to the side. “I would love to know just how skewed it’s gotten, but that will be for another time. Right now, we need to focus on just how the hell the Warriors were able to find the ancient sigils and master them. I’m really doubting that they have that type of power, even with all of them combined.”

“You forget how many of them stole the Power of the Titan,” Levi reminded them, and you furrowed your brows.

“What do you mean the Marleyans stole the Power of the Titan?” you asked. “And what is the Power of the Titan? You two have said it before, but I don’t understand. I thought that all Eldians were Titans.”

At that, Hange burst into laughter, grabbing their sides as they threw their head back and cackled.

“Sounds like our history is really skewed for the humans!” they snickered. “Oh, Emb. Thanks. I needed that.”

To your surprise, Levi spoke up.

“All Eldians have the…necessary genetics, I suppose, to turn into Titans,” he said. “However, not all Eldians have the Power of the Titan.

“The Power is passed down. Do you remember what I said about the Three Nights, how we celebrate Ymir’s daughters? That’s because they all inherited Ymir’s Titan power, and they inherited it in gruesome ways. You can only inherit Titan abilities in certain ways, and they’re not pretty. In total, there are nine Eldians with inherited Titans. The only way to inherit those powers is for the one possessing the Titan to die and pass it on to their successor. When the Marleyans rebelled, they took six Eldians with the Power of the Titan and they killed them and took the Power for themselves.”

“How do those powers get inherited?” you asked, though you dreaded the answer. From the dark looks in Hange and Levi’s eyes, you knew you would likely regret asking.

“That’s where your stories ring a little true,” Levi said solemnly. “Ymir’s daughters had to eat her. Their mother died right before the height of the war began between humans and Eldians, and Ymir was the only one with the Power of the Titan. They knew that the true advantage would be becoming Titans themselves. The eldest, Maria, went first. She spent the first night with her dead mother. On the second night, it was Rose who took over. Then, on the final night, it was Sina, the youngest, who finished Ymir off.”

You felt sick to your stomach.

“But why?” you choked out, afraid you might gag. “How did they know that eating their own mother was going to let them inherit the Power of the Titan?”

“Because of sigillary,” Levi answered plainly. The story didn’t faze him at all. It was just part of his history. “When Ymir was made into a Titan, it was done by humans who performed a type of magic that would etch sigils into her bones and her blood. By consuming her body, her daughters were able to have those sigils in their bodies. Once you have them in you, you can’t reverse the process. It’s a kind of magic that is so intense, it has spanned millennia.”

“And now people have to eat each other to get those powers?” you breathed out, horrified.

“Thankfully that barbaric practice started and ended with the daughters of Ymir,” Levi said. “We’ll never forget their sacrifice, of course, but we’re not going to grind up bones and drink blood and chew on ligaments.”

Now you were really feeling queasy. Why did he have to be so blunt about it?

“You look green, Embla,” Hange commented. “Not a fan of cannibalism?”

“Is anyone?” you countered, but there was no bite in your tone. You were just trying to keep yourself from throwing up.

You shut your eyes to stop the room from spinning, referencing what Levi and Hange were telling you to compare with what you thought you knew.

“I thought Ymir made a deal with the devil,” you squeaked. “That’s what we’ve always been told. And we were told there were originally 10 Titans.”

“Humans are all imbeciles,” Levi snapped.

“Levi,” Hange chided.

You took deep breaths, the nausea slowly fading, and when you felt better, you opened your eyes again.

The room wasn’t spinning anymore, and both Levi and Hange had their eyes on you. It was then that you saw how Eldian they were. So used to their history, so much older than you. Though they looked young, appearing only a little older than you, you remembered that Levi was at least a couple hundred years old. And now, you could almost see it. You saw it behind his eyes, how he’d seen so much and had been through so much. Now, even with lively Hange, you could see the years in their eyes as well. You wondered briefly if they’d been there when this story had begun.

It was strange, knowing that the myths you’d been told were really just myths, not founded on much truth at all, other than the fact that the Eldian realm existed and some of the characters were right. But Hange was correct in that you couldn’t dwell on that too much right now. It would have to wait.

“I’m guessing sigillary isn’t just used to turn people into Titans. What have you been able to figure out?” you asked.

“For one thing, I’m not sure Eldians even have the resources to master it. Well, I wasn’t sure, until we had our little chat. Sigillary was often used to transform things, or create things, like with Ymir. There is much speculation even in Eldia how the portals between the human realm and the Eldian realm came to be. Maybe it was due to sigils? And many of the texts referencing sigillary suggest that it can only be done in the human realm. Though it’s our realm that has all the magic, the sigillary performed on Ymir happened in the human realm and has lasted for two thousand years here in our world. I’m guessing the fact that these sigils exist within Eldians with inherited Titans, in the Eldian realm, give those sigils even more longevity than, say, the human realm.”

That made some sense. You nodded to show that you were following along.

“Some portals to the human realm still exist, though, right?” you asked, and Hange nodded.

“Yes. In Eldia, there’s really only one portal and it’s heavily guarded and warded. Eldians don’t really visit humans anymore and it’s extremely difficult to get approval to cross into your realm anyway. However, I have a hunch that Marleyans founded Marley where they did because there was a portal there, too,” they said.

There was so much history to wrap your brain around.

“When was Marley founded?” you asked.

“It was over two hundred years ago now,” Hange answered. “They had a rebellion and took six of our Titans, then retreated to some unused land. Marley is heavily guarded and warded as well, it may as well be a separate realm entirely. Not even the Scouts can push through. There’s been a lot of unrest ever since.”

The Scouts.

“Are you a Scout, Hange?” you asked, eyes lighting up as you turned to Levi. “Are you, Levi?”

“We are! The Scout Regiment is one of our military factions. I’m a section commander,” Hange said proudly.

Levi kept quiet, but your curiosity outweighed your slight intimidation.

“Are you a commander, Levi?” you pressed, but he glowered at you.

It would make sense. He held authority, and you felt that he could take control of any situation. Plus, he was kind of scary sometimes.

“He’s a captain,” Hange answered for him.

“Captain Levi,” you said with a grin. You expected him to double down on his glaring but, to your delight, he merely rolled his eyes and looked away.

“He must like you,” Hange continued, a sly grin on their face. “When people get on his nerves, he whacks ‘em.”

As if to show the sincerity of their words, you watched as Levi, quick as a cat, swatted Hange over the head and elicited a yelp from them. You pursed your lips together to hide your laugh, hoping to escape Hange’s fate.

But, as Levi left the room, grumbling to himself, Hange hanging off their armchair and whining, you let out a little snicker.

***

The rest of the day passed you by, with Levi working on something with whatever he’d gotten today, and Hange back in their study.

You were largely left to your own devices, unless Hange had a question for you, but you filled the day looking at some history books that Hange let you borrow.

What you uncovered was gruesome and fascinating.

There had definitely been a time when magic was rampant in the human realm, but it was hard to harness, and most humans didn’t have what it took to handle and control it. However, eventually certain humans were able to learn how to use magic and passed that knowledge down to their descendants. They found that magic had its own language, and thus sigillary was born. Entire lineages were born to be dedicated to witchcraft, mostly using magic to become healers or alchemists, but their all-encompassing term was “witches”.

Eventually, the humans who didn’t have these capabilities grew wary of those who did, and some even sought that power for themselves. One in particular, a King Fritz, eagerly and brutally captured witches, and tried to take their magic from them. Ymir was among one of those witches.

King Fritz wasn’t a name you were familiar with, so it was safe to say that he had been lost to time or that humans had purposely rewritten the stories to exclude the evildoings of a particular human being. Even in Eldian texts, there wasn’t a lot of background on him. There wasn’t much history available on Ymir’s early life anymore either, but it was heavily assumed that she was a “runt” in her family, the weakest of her lineage. Her own family passed her up to King Fritz when he attacked her village. She had been abandoned – betrayed – by everyone she’d ever loved.

That part struck you hard, and you felt a heaviness in your heart as you learned about Ymir’s cruel fate. You had to stop reading for a while, choosing instead to sit with your sympathy. It was strange, feeling bad for a character that had been humanity’s antagonist for so long. But now, knowing her story, about to uncover the whole truth, you had never related to a person more.

Images of Pieck, Pock, and Reiner filled your head, and you clenched your jaw as your heart clenched in your chest. Had they really betrayed you like this? What was it about you that made them target you? That was the biggest mystery of all. You weren’t anything special. You were just some anxiety-ridden girl who spooked too easy and couldn’t even kill a spider on her own.

There was something you were missing, some piece of the puzzle you hadn’t found yet. It felt like it was at the tip of your tongue, right in your peripheral vision, but it was escaping you, always just out of reach. If you could just get to the bottom of the reason they’d found you and latched onto you, part of you just knew that you could get the whole picture.

***

Before the sun started to set, you decided to go for a walk. It wasn’t fun being cooped up in a house all day, and you were starting to get antsy. The idea of taking a little stroll and exploring didn’t seem so scary, not when you knew the village would still be empty and that the likelihood of running into a Titan was apparently slimmer than you had originally been made to believe.

Not wanting to disturb Hange and Levi, you left the house as quietly as you could, walking down the street and making mental notes so you wouldn’t get lost. You also needed to remember to start heading back before nightfall, as to not attract unwanted attention. That seemed like a far off worry, though.

Ragako was small but peaceful and well-structured; much of the architecture reminded you of Germanic influences. The streets were desolate and it was exceedingly quiet, but it wasn’t eerie or lonely at all. Maybe there was some sort of charm over the village, but it felt full of love.

You did a lot of window shopping, peering into bakery shops and clothing boutiques, enthralled by what you saw. The style of clothing was old-fashioned, so different from what you were used to. You looked down at your outfit, noting how plain and modern it was, just jeans and a long-sleeved shirt, and you frowned a little bit. Maybe this was why Eldians were able to clock you as a human right away. Maybe Hange and Levi could score you some new clothes, if it came down to it and you’d be here for a while.

You stopped for a moment, mulling over the thought. What if you were here for a while? What if you couldn’t make it back ever? Surprisingly, the idea wasn’t as anxiety-inducing as you would have thought it’d be. It still wasn’t lost on you that you hadn’t gone fully insane upon learning where you were; really, the only time you’d lost your mind was having to think about your painful past, and the fears associated with that. Traveling across realms was apparently easier than dealing with your normal human experiences. And, before all this, you’d been on the cusp of starting fresh back home anyway. Perhaps this was the universe’s funny way of granting you that wish.

Definitely something to think about. But you’d have shove those thoughts back for later and let yourself just be right now.

Looking up to the sky, you admired the deep blue of it, only some wisps of clouds blotting it, then caught how low the sun was. It was going to dip into the horizon soon, which meant you needed to start heading back.

As you turned around, however, you jumped a little when you realized you weren’t alone. Levi was making his way towards you, his eyes hard as steel and his stride purposeful.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” he called out to you.

“I just wanted to get out of the house and stretch my legs,” you said, shrinking back. Was it really so bad to do that?

“You should have at least let me know before you snuck out, you little shit. You have Hange freaked out thinking you somehow transported back to your own world. Don’t you ever use your brain?” Levi scolded.

“Nobody’s even in town! I thought it’d be the safest time to go for a walk,” you argued, walking towards him. As the two of you met in the middle, Levi’s hand shot out at you to grab your elbow. He was going to actually drag you back to Hange’s place.

You struggled in his grip, but he was exceptionally strong, and you eventually relented and let him guide you back, both of you clearly angry.

As soon as you crossed the threshold into Hange’s house, you tore away from him and took a breath as Hange rushed to you, eyes wild.

“Emb! I was so scared we’d lost you! Not to be selfish, but I didn’t want you going home without solving this crazy mystery of ours!” they exclaimed.

As angry at Levi as you were, you did feel bad for making Hange worry.

“Sorry, Hange. I just wanted to go outside for a while,” you apologized, then turned to glare at Levi over your shoulder. “I didn’t realize I would be reprimanded for it.”

“Insolent brat,” Levi grunted, his grey eyes hard as metal.

You clenched your hands into fists and turned back to Hange, giving them a nod.

“Excuse me, Hange,” you said hurredly, skirting past them to head to the guestroom.

You slammed the door shut behind you, heart pounding. Angry tears welled up in your eyes as you sat by the window, the world outside blurry as you cried.

Stupid Levi. He didn’t need to be so mean like that and make you feel like some bratty kid. You wiped your eyes, clearing your vision so you could take a look outside and calm yourself.

The sun was setting quickly, that golden glow of sunset drenching the village. The sky that had once been a deep blue was now bleeding with rich hues of orange, scarlet, and rose. It was beautiful, but you could hardly admire it.

Again, you thought of Ymir and related strongly to her, going so far as to equate your situation with being trapped and imprisoned like she had been. It wasn’t nearly the same, you knew that deep down, but you had little to no control over your situation, just like Ymir. You were powerless right now. At least Levi was no King Fritz.

To distract yourself and make yourself calm down, you thought back to the other things you’d learned, especially about King Fritz and Ymir’s transformation.

King Fritz had learned a lot about sigillary from his brutal conquest for magic and believed that he could etch some very powerful sigils into Ymir’s deepest parts, her blood and her bones, and then consume those parts of her. He hadn’t killed every witch that had crossed his path – he had actually enslaved some of them in order to help him understand and practice sigils and ordered them to be the ones to cast this powerful spell on Ymir. It surprised you and disgusted you to think of how far he would go for power, but humans were still like that to this day. The lengths a person would go for even the tiniest possibility of gaining power made you sick.

But you were snapped out of your thoughts when the door to the guestroom opened. You kept your face neutral, expecting to see Hange, but you did a double take when you saw who it really was.

Levi.

[writertitan]

a head canon I wanna share is that Levi would relent to making a TikTok account for you to share memes but he wouldn’t look at the shit you would send bc he would curate his fyp to be the rug cleaning videos and city tour videos

[writertitan]

Perennial // Part 2

a/n: hello! i'm a little late, but here's to a belated bday for levi! and happy holidays to those who celebrate!

pairing: levi x fem!reader

overall themes: fantasy AU, strangers to lovers, traveling through realms, explicit content

part 2 themes: worldbuilding, reader annoying levi, some softness

read part one here

You weren’t in the temple anymore. You turned and watched as Levi seemed to come out of thin air, a little out of breath, but the both of you remained intact, still joined at your hands. With a racing heart, you let go. Whether the pounding of your heart was due to what just happened or this incidental moment of physical touch, you didn't want to know.

“What’s wrong with you?” you asked, raising your brows. “Why are you out of breath?”

Levi frowned at you, wiping the last bit of sweat off his brow. He seemed almost surprised at your question, but his face eventually cemented back into nonchalance.

“What did I say about asking questions?” he mumbled, walking in front of you to lead the way.

You took in your surroundings as you walked behind Levi, feeling that wonderful sense of peace embrace you. The mirror had taken you to some kind of valley. Mountains that were so high they reached the sky flanked you at both sides, mostly rocky with bits of greenery here and there. The valley you walked on was what was lusciously green, a river cutting through the moss and soft grass. You noticed you were following the direction the river’s water was running, but looking behind and in front of you, there was nothing but this view for miles and miles.

You wanted to ask where you were going and where you had come to, but you knew better by now. Best to just let Levi lead the way.

Part of you also knew that you should still be absolutely losing your mind right now. There was still no logical explanation as to what was happening to you, but it was like this valley stifled those feelings. The air was still and calm and smelled a little sweet, and the night sky was still sprinkled with an astounding number of stars and meteors shooting across the sky. The moon was still bright and big above you, its craters clearly visible. You admired it for a moment until you slowed your steps, confused. Earlier, when you’d liked behind you to examine the length of the river and valley, you saw the moon there, peaking over a mountain. Had it orbited to be in front of you so soon? You whirled around just to make sure, eyes like saucers when you saw…another moon. Just as bright, maybe a little smaller.

“What the fuck?” you choked out, tripping over your own two feet.

“What is it?” Levi asked. You turned to face him, your heart racing, and with shaky hands, you pointed each hand towards each moon.

Levi seemed to immediately understand, and his jaw set a little, his smoky eyes on you in an instant, looking wary. He took a very slow, very gentle step towards you, as if you were a scared animal that might run away with any sudden movements.

“We’re almost there, Embla,” he murmured, deliberately calm. “Just a few more minutes until I can know for sure you’re really safe, and then—”

“We’re almost where?!” you shrieked, your entire body trembling. That calming feeling was ebbing, making way for your undiluted fear. “I’m freaking out, Levi! You’re asking me to trust you when I don’t even know you! You won’t even call me by my actual name. And I don’t know where I am, but I’m clearly not…I’m not where I should be. I’m in a place I’m not supposed to be in.”

“That’s right,” Levi said, his response immediate. “You came from somewhere else. I know it’s scary, but you need to take a deep breath and calm down. There’s a reason I’m making you wait for answers and taking you to a specific place. Please, Embla. I need you to trust me just a little bit longer. I’m going to help you.”

You were hyperventilating and frozen in place. And, even though you were outside, where everything looked and felt endless, you had never felt so stifled and claustrophobic in your life. In a weird way, it felt like you were trapped in your body, which didn’t make sense.

“I can’t move,” you gasped out, and Levi’s gaze softened.

He closed the distance between the two of you and took hold of your hand, the warmth of his palm blazing through you. As if on cue, your heart raced within your chest again, like it had before after going through the mirror.

“I told you not to stay still for too long,” he whispered. “Take a deep breath.”

You did as you were told, albeit the breath was pretty shaky, and then closed your eyes as the air whooshed from your lungs. Levi’s hand squeezed yours and you let yourself focus entirely on that, opening your eyes when you felt him manipulating your hand until your palm was facing the sky and your fingers were spread wide. His pointer finger traced some invisible symbol on your palm, a few times over, until your heart began to slow and your breathing steadied, and your limbs loosened up.

You took a step toward him, bumping into him with how close you were, and then you were acting without thinking. You threw your arms around him and hugged him tight, needing the comfort more than anything. He was stiff and you ended the hug before he could even really react, but you felt much better.

“Let’s go,” he muttered awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck. You bit back a smile when you noticed his ears were pink. His embarrassment was enough of a delightful distraction to keep your blood pressure down.

Levi was right about not needing to walk that much longer. Within a couple of minutes, you were standing in front of the rocky wall of a mountain, bare of anything other than more rock. However, Levi took a step forward and placed both of his hands on the mountain, whispering something you couldn’t make out, until a low rumble filled the air. You watched in shock as the mountain wall shifted, a crack in it expanding until you realized it was opening up for you. It was dark inside, so dark that you couldn’t see how big the inside was, but you followed behind Levi anyway.

A few steps in and you heard that rumble again. Turning your head, you watched in horror as the mountain’s opening closed behind you.

“Levi!” you half-whispered, half-shouted, tugging at the arm you were holding onto for dear life.

“It’s supposed to do that,” he replied casually.

When the mountain fully closed you in and you were swallowed by the darkness, that’s when light brimmed out.

You blinked in surprise as what could have easily been little stars of light came to life, came out of nowhere, and guided you down the remainder of the rocky hallway that you now realized was rather short, and led to a wooden door that was perfectly framed into the inside of this curious mountain.

Levi opened it with ease and you followed him into the room, the lights following you, and you gasped a little as more light bloomed in the large room you entered.

Candles lit themselves atop an iron chandelier above you, and even more ignited along the walls. Shelves and alcoves had been carved into the rock itself, filled with trinkets, jars, books, and loose pieces of paper. Despite how many things there were, everything seemed to have its own little place, and it didn’t feel cluttered. A few velvet chairs decorated the place, the biggest one placed at a wooden desk that was shoved against the wall.

“This is weird,” you muttered, though you were very much charmed by it. “Where are we?”

Levi was quiet for a moment, and then motioned for you to sit in a chair. You took an emerald green velvet chair, taking off your backpack to place on your lap, while Levi took the deep blue one across from yours.

“This is a safe place for you. One of my many hiding spots,” he explained. “It’s guarded, I promise. No one gets near this place unless I allow it.”

“Okay…,” you murmured, looking around before letting your gaze settle back on Levi. “I still have, like, a million questions, Levi. What happened to me? Do you know? You seem like you know.”

Levi frowned a bit at that, then nodded his head once a little, though he seemed hesitant to.

“I don’t know how, exactly, you managed to get here. But you’re in Eldia.”

The words struck you like bricks, a shock to the system.

At first, you wanted to laugh. You were in total disbelief at what he’d just told you.

“Eldia?” you repeated. It felt like you had blinked a thousand times in one second while trying to process what he was saying to you. “Eldia’s not real.”

Levi sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose before saying, “It would be great if you could skip past the denial stage. It would save both of us so much grief.”

Eldia.

Eldia.

There was no way he was being serious.

Eldia was a story. A myth. Another realm where magic beings walked the earth and held the power of Titans. A realm full of beings that were tied to the devil and had tried to destroy humans. It wasn’t real.

“I know that humans don’t believe anymore. We prefer it that way and even had part in making it that way. As far as I know, we cut off every…point of entry, I guess is the right way to put it. You technically shouldn’t even have access to us,” Levi said. “You can imagine the shock of knowing a human being made it over to our side.”

It felt like all the blood rushed out of your face. Your backpack suddenly felt very heavy in your lap.

“It’s not real,” you whispered, mostly to yourself.

But how else could you explain everything? You’d had this sinking feeling the entire time, that you weren’t in the right place. That you weren’t in your true reality. And mirror and the sky and the moons and everything…it all pointed to Levi telling the truth.

“I’m gonna throw up,” you groaned, tilting your head back until it collided with the plush velvet of your chair.

“Please don’t,” Levi said with a grimace. But you could see that he looked nervous, which was odd. You were the one who should have every right to be nervous, and that was at the very least. If you were in Eldia…you were most definitely in danger.

“I don’t understand. You don’t look like a Titan. Shouldn’t you be, like, a hundred feet tall?” you asked. Levi was short and looked…normal. He looked human.

Levi didn’t answer, though. He frowned, clearly bothered by what you were saying, and you decided to focus your attention back on fighting the urge to be sick.

You really did feel lightheaded and dizzy, but maybe that had something to do with the fact you hadn’t eaten in a while and maybe you were dehydrated. On top of the fact that you’d accidentally teleported into another realm, of course.

With a trembling hand, you unzipped your backpack and pulled out a stolen treat, ripping open the package to shove a handful of chips into your mouth.

“We’ll have to get you something to eat from here, too,” Levi said, watching you crunch on your chips. “From what I vaguely remember, your body will need to acclimate to this realm. That’s why I’ve been telling you not to be still for too long.”

“Will something bad happen to me if I don’t acclimate?” you asked through a mouthful of chips. Levi didn’t seem too pleased at your lack of manners but didn’t comment on it.

“I should have explained better. It’s not quite your body, but your soul that’s attached to your body. It just…freaks out, as you put it. Like earlier, when you felt you couldn’t move, that was likely your spirit trying to…,” Levi sighed again, giving you a look. “Don’t panic at what I’m about to say, but that was probably your spirit trying to leave your body. It needs to adjust to being in this realm.”

You shuddered at the thought of earlier, and how it had felt like you had no control over your own body, and how it felt you were claustrophobic, like you were confined despite being in open space. It had probably been your soul, feeling trapped in a body that was trapped in a strange place. You’d never given much thought to souls or anything like that, but you maybe believed in the concept a little, and the idea of yours trying to abandon your physical body was terrifying. Still, it was interesting to think of how it would react to your situation. It was a little funny to think that souls weren't very into the idea of realm-hopping.

Levi got up from his chair and moved over to the alcove, rummaging around until he came back with a mug filled with dark liquid. The way it swirled in the mug hardly made it look like liquid, though; it looked like air. It also reminded you of Levi’s eyes.

“This is smokeroot tea. I put little charms in there as well for your protection. It should be enough to make the soul adapt,” he said. You took the mug from him and peered inside, taking a whiff of the tea. It smelled good, definitely kind of smokey, but a little earthy, too.

“An Eldian helping a human,” you murmured, but held the mug solidly in your hands. You had to keep trusting Levi, even if this was all true and he was an Eldian. He hadn’t done anything to harm you yet, and had done nothing but help, so you took a sip of the tea. You didn’t know what to expect, yet it still surprised you to enjoy the taste. It was nice to have something to wash the chips down with.

“Thanks,” you whispered to Levi, gazing at him through your lashes.

He got a little stiff and awkward then, taking an involuntary step back.

“It’s nothing,” he muttered, his gaze turning back to the alcove. “I also have some dried rabbit meat. Let me give you some of that.”

That made you a little queasy.

“I’ve never…I’ve never had rabbit before,” you said, trying to be polite. “Will the tea be enough to keep my soul tethered to my body or whatever?”

“You should eat it just to be safe,” Levi said, handing you what looked like a strip of beef jerky. You took it to examine it and swallowed thickly, mentally preparing yourself for what was probably going to be an unpleasant taste, but you ate it so fast and downed it with tea and chips that you hardly noticed the taste at all.

It was then that you held the bag of chips up to Levi, giving him a hesitant smile.

“Want to try these? Do you have potato chips here? These are just sea salt ones, but they’re classic,” you rambled.

“No, but thank you. I’m just going to work at my desk for a bit while I give you some time to…process,” Levi said. Oh, well. More for you.

You finished off the tea with your chips, feeling much better by the time both were fully in your stomach. Neither of you really said a word to each other, though Levi also made himself some tea, which helped ease some anxieties you felt guilty about having. Though the quiet was nice and helped lull you into a sense of safety while your mind whirled with all you’d been through, you still had so many questions.

“How did we get here?” you asked quietly, careful not to disturb the peace too much. “I don’t understand. I know you’re not sure how I got here, but how did we move through that mirror thing?”

Levi, who had been sitting at his desk, looked at you from over his shoulder wearing that same guarded look.

“That was what we call a verse mirror. Do you still have telephones in your realm? You can think of it like a phone call, where you are able to call another place, but this is a physical manifestation of that. The thing is, calling through a verse is a little more complicated. It takes a lot of skill. You have to make sure you’re completely connected to the mirror and where you’re going. Otherwise, you could risk ending up somewhere else.”

You nodded, contemplating this new information. You remembered then, how transporting through the mirror had felt so much like what you’d felt before crossing into Eldia.

“What I felt during those moments as we passed through it…that’s what it felt like right before I got here,” you confided, voice barely above a whisper. You were staring at the empty mug in your hands, peering deep inside as if there was something helpful in there. “I was at a gas station though. There wasn’t a verse mirror anywhere in sight, I swear it.” Levi was silent as he took in what you said.

“There isn’t much magic left in your world, that’s true. Any magic there was brought over by us, and we haven’t crossed into your territory in a very, very long time,” he murmured. Then, his gaze was very much fixed on you, smoky eyes staring right into you. “One thing has been puzzling me about that trip through the verse mirror, now that you mention it. You had no problems going through it.”

“So what?” you asked, frowning. “Was I supposed to be all out of breath like you were?”

“Honestly, yes, at the very least you should have been feeling winded and out of sorts, especially with your very spirit feeling so disoriented. I was expecting you to faint, or worse,” he explained. “It can be taxing even on the most experienced Scout, but it didn’t seem to affect you at all.”

“Scout?” you repeated.

Levi stiffened, then gave you one of his looks that told you he was getting irritated.

“I could bore you with several hours’ worth of Eldian politics, but I’m thinking that would be a waste of both our times,” he quipped. You knew his sass was just to change the topic, and part of you wanted to press the subject just to get on his nerves a little bit, but you decided to let it go.

You sighed deeply and looked around, your mind whirling once again. This was certainly a different place, a different realm, somewhere that seemed out of time, but it also didn’t feel entirely too strange to you, which was the weird part. You were expecting the mental breakdown to come at any minute now, and yet you were lounging around Levi’s little hiding place and doing a damn good job of keeping it together. A far away part of your brain was worrying about the movers and your new place and the grief of your life that was in some unreachable place in space right now, but your rational brain was also very aware of the fact that those worries were at the bottom of the list for the foreseeable future.

You should have been worrying about some big things, actually. Not just the fact that you were in some entirely new realm, but also that it was the Eldian realm. This was the most dangerous place for humans to be.

You were racking your brain, trying to remember the bits and pieces of Eldian myth that most of the human world had grown up with.

In most legends, Eldians were once humans themselves, and magic was rampant in the human world. Humans mostly used it for healing purposes or celebrating, but eventually witchcraft was born and it began being used for more sinister purposes, and more and more people dedicated their lives to hoarding magic, rather than letting it be a free thing to share. Eventually, Ymir, the Eldian founder, was born and became the most prolific witch of all. She made a deal with the devil, who created a realm for her – this realm – to funnel all the magic of the human world into it for her sole use. She became the first Titan, an enormous humanoid monster that ate any human who dared attempt to slip into the Eldian realm, and then eventually sought out and resurrected 9 of the most cunning demons from the netherworld to bestow the Titan gift onto, in order to help her grow her realm. All 9 of them were demons that feasted on human flesh, and so Ymir crossed over to the human realm with those 9 demons to dominate humanity and use them like cattle. But, humanity had been able to put up enough of a fight to not only hold their ground, but even capture one of those Titans, thanks to a hero in the myths named Helos. Stories differed around the end of this fight, but in every story, Ymir and those 8 remaining Titans crossed back into Eldia. The most popular myth was that the humans captured the most powerful Titan, one that held the power to control passage between realms, with some even saying it was the actual devil himself, and it had forced Ymir to return to Eldia and use her last breath to close all entries but one into Eldia, which is heavily warded.

Most of the myths surrounding the realm of Eldia were tales of morality and cautionary tales, like many legends and folklore. You, like most others, learned these stories as children from adults who wanted you to stop being a brat or wander off, lest you find yourself in Eldia and get eaten by a Titan. You remember studying them again as a young adult, dissecting the stories and ultimately coming to the conclusion that they were also religious propaganda, a way to stop people from dabbling in witchcraft or other “dark” practices.

You hadn’t thought about Eldia in years. And now, you were literally here, a sheep among wolves, so to speak. And yet, you remembered the way the hordes of Eldians looked at you today. It intimidated you, yes, even scared you, but you didn’t feel a real threat to your life. Everyone had been so startled, so confused, but from what you recalled, nobody had wanted to take a bite out of you. And you hadn’t seen any actual Titans, no huge beasts as tall as skyscrapers with jagged grins and fiery bodies.

“What are you thinking about?”

Levi’s voice made you nearly jump out of your skin, and you swore as the mug you’d been holding clattered to the floor. Thankfully, though, it didn’t break.

You bent down to pick it up, but Levi was already there and doing it. You didn’t miss the dirty look he shot you before he put the mug away.

“You scared me,” you muttered.

“So, you can ask a million questions, but I can’t?” Levi asked.

You rolled your eyes. Then, as you were about to answer, you felt your face heat up.

“I was trying to remember everything I’ve learned about Eldia,” you admitted.

“Trying to figure out how fucked you are?” Levi asked, his voice flat. It almost made you laugh, but you managed to stifle it to a short snort.

“Something like that.”

“You’ll have to tell me what you’ve been taught. I’ve always been curious as to what humans think they know nowadays, after so much time has passed,” he said quietly. At that, you got curious.

“Have you ever been to the human realm?” you asked before you could stop yourself.

“Yes. I never interacted with humans in depth, though, and most of my visits were a very long time ago. My last one, however, was recent enough that I know humans are making great technological advancements, even without magic. The telephone was a personal favorite of mine. I liked the dial,” he mused.

You, however, were in awe. Your eyebrows shot up at his words. First, you were honestly a little surprised he would divulge any information about himself. He was so cagey with you. But also, to think he was this old, seeing the invention of the telephone...it was almost impossible to wrap your head around it. It was starting to make sense. Sometimes he paused when he was speaking, as if trying to use the correct “lingo” with you, though he wasn’t quite with the times on that front. And if it had been that long ago that he'd seen what the human realm was up to, did he still think the first renditions of the telephone were humanity's greatest technological achievements?

“Do you wanna see what phones look like now?” you asked him.

Without waiting for an answer, you dug through your backpack to fish out your phone, standing up so you could go to the alcove and show him.

Though he was clearly trying to look unfazed, you could see something flash in his eyes as he took the phone from your hand.

“We call them cell phones now. Or just phones,” you said, letting your phone come to life so he could see your home screen. “With this little thing, we have access to the entire world. Uh, human world. You can have everything at your fingertips, basically. It’s not just for phone calls anymore. It can be kind of overwhelming sometimes, now that I think of it.”

You unlocked your phone so you could prattle on about apps and the internet and your limited knowledge on how it all worked, but Levi stopped you.

“How are you making everything…come to life? You’re just pressing your finger on these strange symbols,” he said, slowly, trying to find the words.

“It’s just…the way technology works now. The screen can sense that I'm touching a particular area and gets me to where I want to go. Something science-y,” you answered, a little embarrassed you couldn’t give a more detailed explanation.

Levi seemed invested, however, and that made you happy. It also eased your mind a little bit; your other life was real, and waiting for you, and this would all be in the past one day.

"I had no idea you'd all come such a long way," he mumbled.

You let him touch the screen and direct him onto certain apps, and felt a little embarrassed when he looked at your social media. He seemed surprised to see photos of you there. Pictures of you with friends, traveling photos, and the occasional selfie. He spent a second longer on your selfies, which made you feel a little nervous, but you were just happy to see him so curious.

"Is photography more accessible?" he asked.

You gave a sly grin and took your phone back, showing him your camera. You made sure you had it on your front facing camera and angled the screen to capture mostly Levi's face, snapping the picture before he could react. His eyes grew wider when you showed him the photo, immediately available to view, but his wide gaze was replaced by a narrow glare.

"Don't do that again," he warned.

You rolled your eyes and put your phone away, turning it off to conserve some battery. Not that it had any signal here, but you would probably need it soon, when you were back on the other side.

You looked at Levi, who was now seated across from you again, not sure how to word what you needed to ask.

“So…what’s the plan to get me home?” you asked. Well, that would have to do.

Levi didn’t seem bothered, though. He was lost in his thoughts, his brows knit together to form a very concentrated look on his face, and you watched him curiously.

“First, we need to figure out how you got through. Once I know that, we can start working on getting you to cross realms,” he said.

“Fair enough,” you sighed. “How do you propose we figure that out?”

“I know someone that may be able to help with that,” he said vaguely, his eyes sliding to you. “But that’ll have to wait until tomorrow. Maybe you should rest.”

As soon as he said that, it was like your brain finally registered how tired you were. So much stimulation and change, on top of an already stressful day.

You yawned involuntarily, despite your best efforts not to, and then looked at Levi sheepishly.

“I guess some sleep wouldn’t hurt,” you admitted.

“I don’t really have a bed here,” Levi said, and if you didn’t know any better, you could have sworn his eyes held a little bit of sheepishness as well. “I don’t want you to tire yourself out getting to a place that does have one –”

You cut him off with a wave of your hand, already curling up in your chair.

“You’ll come to find out that I can sleep just about anywhere,” you told him. You were already drifting off. Levi didn’t say anything, but he did procure the softest blanket you’ve ever felt to toss over you.

Would he come to find out? If you were leaving tomorrow, then he wouldn’t come to find out a damn thing about you. Maybe you were dreaming it, but you could have sworn your heart sank a little at the thought.

---

You had no idea how long you’d slept, but it must have been a while. There weren’t any windows in the room you were in, but when Levi noticed you were awake, he immediately got some tea started and then put some bread and butter in front of you and curtly announced it as, "Breakfast."

“How did you sleep?” he asked, taking a sip of his tea. It was the same as yesterday, smokeroot, and you happily sipped from your mug.

“I slept like the dead,” you said. “Neck is a little sore, but that’s fine.”

“Good. Then you’re well-rested enough for all we have to do today,” Levi said flatly.

You made a face behind your mug and then took another sip of tea, mulling over everything. A comfortable silence fell over the two of you, but as your mind spun round and round, you finally had to just blurt out some thoughts.

“I keep waiting for my brain to just…I don’t know. Break from all this,” you admitted quietly. “I keep waiting for a freakout. I keep expecting to curl up in a ball because I can’t process what’s happening. At this point, I’m more freaked out about having to wait on the freakout, than the actual freakout.”

“Well, that tea was going to help calm you down on top of helping your body keep your soul. Now that you’re acclimating, that’s probably a big part of why you aren’t feeling too bad.”

“No, you don’t understand,” you began, “I’m…I’m not used to adventuring. I’m used to keeping myself safe. I’m kind of in disbelief that I’m able to deal with this at all.”

“You seem to be handling this just fine,” Levi said. “I don’t see how that’s a problem. Why are you expecting all of that?”

Your face heated up and you looked down at your half-empty plate, ripping off a piece of bread just to rip that little piece into even tinier pieces.

“Because I’m not exactly the bravest person ever,” you said. “I’ve always been more of a scaredy-cat. I scare easy and I’m always anxious about one thing or another, and I hate sudden changes, and I hate not knowing. I’ve always been like that. You’re the only reason I haven’t been eaten alive here, and that should really scare me, and I should be so terrified right now, but I’m not. I think it’s all going to come crashing down at the worst moment.”

Levi was quiet. You dared to glance up at him and were surprised to see that he was staring right at you.

“The human mind is very durable. Humanity itself is very durable, if I remember correctly,” he said. “You shouldn’t sell yourself short. I think you would be surprised at what you’re capable of.”

It was strange, receiving such a sincere compliment like that. No one back home would have ever come close to saying you were durable.

But now that you’d gotten it out of your system, you felt lighter, and you wanted to change the subject. Your curiosity was getting the better of you again when it came to Levi.

“When’s the last time you visited the human world? It sounds like it’s been a while, if the last thing you saw be invented was the telephone,” you said. Then, in a quiet voice, you asked, “Do Eldians go into our realm often?”

It was hard trying to decipher Levi’s facial expressions. He was so good at hiding behind a calm mask. It was like trying to see past a brick wall. But you could see emotions flickering behind his eyes once in a while.

“That was the last time I was there, that’s true. It’s been a long time in human years. And I’ll never go back again, not for anything,” he said, and the way he said it made you not press for more. “The last time I went was the last time most Eldians went. I haven’t heard of a single one of us returning to that place since then. If it’s happened, I know nothing about it.”

So, he wasn’t fond of the human world. Which was funny, considering that he had just hyped up humanity only minutes ago.

After another silence, this one a little more tense, it was actually Levi that spoke first.

“No one is going to eat you,” he said, taking your empty plate from you when you were finished.

You blinked in surprise, not expecting that.

“Excuse me?”

“There’s a lot of misinformation – let’s just call it misinformation. About Eldia,” he said. He gestured towards his own empty plate. “I’m sure you noticed that I’m not munching on human bones.”

“Variety diet,” you said blandly, hoping the joke would land, but Levi’s glare told you it didn’t. “I’m only kidding. Kind of.”

Levi sighed, signaling he was done with the conversation, and you felt like you’d failed somehow.

“Tell me why every story mentions the fact that you eat people, then? I’m not following,” you told him, folding your arms over your chest.

“Because that’s what you were told to believe,” Levi snapped. “We don’t…do that. A lot of what you think you know is actually false. You don’t know anything at all.”

That struck a nerve in you.

“It’s not like you’re ever keen to answer any of my questions,” you quipped back.

The two of you were glaring at each other now. Levi’s jaw was set and your entire body was rigid.

“I’ve known you less than a day, with you being asleep some of that time, and you’re already the most aggravating person I’ve ever met,” Levi told you.

You gave him an exaggerated smile, your eyes still flashing with your glare.

“That pleases me,” you said through your smile, before rolling your eyes and standing up.

“So much for being a scaredy-cat. You’re more like a feral cat,” Levi muttered under his breath, but fully with the intention that you’d hear him.

You ignored him and straightened out your clothes, then put a hand in your hair, frowning to yourself; you probably looked like a total mess.

After doing what you could without even a mirror to guide you, you turned back to Levi, arms crossed again, trying to keep your face neutral like he often did.

“When are we leaving to find your little friend?” you asked.

“Right now,” he said. “Grab your things and don’t forget anything. We won’t come back.”

The quickness startled you, but you did as he said and then followed him back into that hallway inside the mountain, until it eventually opened to the valley outside again. The sunlight hit you hard and you squinted, holding a hand over your eyes to shield them until they adjusted.

The valley was just as beautiful in the day as it was at night. The plush green grass and sapphire sky looked magical. Wildflowers bloomed in pockets here and there, and the rocky path along the mountain even held some pretty weeds in the cracks. The river was so clear that you could see fish darting around, and the rocks at the bottom glittered and looked like they all held vibrant colors.

How could such a dangerous land be so beautiful?

You held the straps of your backpack as you walked alongside Levi, your neck craning this way and that while you took in the sights. The only sounds were the rush of the water and the songs of birds and your footsteps that moved the loose stones and pebbles in your path. Levi didn’t say a word and neither did you.

There was nothing to see for miles but the beauty of the valley, but you knew better by now. There was magic here, and it didn’t matter if you were in the middle of nowhere. You could be taken to entirely new places with the help of Levi.

Levi.

You slightly tilted your head to peek at him from your peripheral vision, taking in the sight of him. He was looking straight ahead, posture straight and confident as he walked. His hair was still night-black even in the daytime, and you marveled at his strong profile. His nose was straight, and his jaw was strong and defined.

“Don’t stare at me like that,” he spoke up, only glancing at you briefly. His eyes glinted silver in the sunlight.

You felt your entire face grow hot and looked away, heart racing. Why was it racing? How did he know what you were doing?

---------

You walked for hours, but it didn’t feel so tiring, not when there was so much to see. You loved how the sun felt on your skin, you loved the gentle breeze that ruffled your hair, you loved how sweet the air smelled. It was nice to get away from the ugliness back home.

It hadn’t been totally silent the whole way. Eventually, you just had to strike up conversations with the ever-reluctant Levi.

You asked him little things occasionally, things that wouldn’t piss him off, but you mostly commented on your surroundings and revealed the occasional fact about yourself.

“I fell into a river once, when I was a kid. I didn’t know how to swim back then, and the river currents were really strong, so I was swept away pretty fast. But I got lucky and the current pushed me against this huge boulder on the edge of the river, and I was able to pull myself out. My parents put me in swimming lessons after that,” you rambled, your eyes on the river at your side. It was narrow, some would have probably even called it more of a stream than a river, and the water seemed to idly bubble along. You knew better, though; underneath the surface was a whole different story.

Levi seemed a little interested in this particular story of yours, though you’d told plenty today. He gave a look you couldn’t decipher, then looked away.

“I saved a human child once, from drowning in a river,” he revealed quietly, his voice level.

You looked at him in awe, surprised at this confession of his.

“That was very kind of you,” you told him, suppressing a smile.

Levi barely reacted, but his face remained calm.

You took it as permission to keep rambling.

---------

The trail had eventually led you out of the valley and into a great expanse of land, still as beautiful but leaving the mountains behind.

There were fields of crops, you noticed, and actual livestock.

And then, up ahead, by the time the sun was signaling late afternoon, you could see what you were sure was a village.

At first, it was exciting. Then, that pit of worry sank like a stone in your stomach.

Eldians. Surely there would be Eldians there.

You remembered how it had been running into them the first time. Levi had to get you out of there. Now he was leading you towards more of them.

You hadn’t noticed you’d slowed down until Levi cleared his throat.

“Don’t start going all chicken-shit on me now, Embla,” he said, his face unreadable. “What’s gotten into you?”

“They’ll know I’m human, won’t they?” you asked, but didn’t wait for an answer. “What are they gonna do? Is it gonna be like last time?”

Levi softened imperceptibly and stopped walking, standing a few feet away from you.

“They won’t hurt you,” he said. “It’ll be just before dusk by the time we get to the outskirts of the village, so the sun will still be out. They won’t come out until dark.”

That didn’t make you feel any better. You thought back to yesterday, how it had been so quiet and lifeless during the day. It hadn’t been until night descended that you saw any traces of life.

“What’s up with that?” you asked, stepping closer to Levi. “Why can’t they come out during the day? Are you like vampires or something?”

Levi scoffed, his glare back full force.

“We can obviously come out during the day, shit-for-brains. I’ve been walking with you all day, haven’t I? There’s a ceremony of sorts being carried out by Eldians. Last night was the first night of it, and tomorrow night will be the last night,” he explained.

“Why aren’t you participating in the ceremony?” you asked, already fired up with questions.

You could see that he didn’t want to answer, but you pressed on this time, using it as a distraction for your anxiety.

“C’mon, Levi! I’m trying to learn,” you said, your tone pleading.

Levi’s shoulders became less tense as you began to walk with him again, although, even as you looked at him with wide, curious eyes, he didn’t look at you.

“Fine,” he grumbled. “If it’ll get you to shut up and walk.”

When he finally turned his head to look at you, you gave him a smile, your first genuine one since getting here. He blinked a couple of times, his lips parted, but in a flash, he was composed again.

“It’s the Three Nights of the Daughters, but we usually just call it the Three Nights. It’s a yearly event where we honor Maria, Rose, and Sina.”

“Who are they?”

This time, it was Levi who stopped walking, an eyebrow raised.

“What?” he asked.

“Maria, Rose, and Sina…who are they?” you asked again, a little more hesitant this time.

“You really don’t know?” Levi asked, and you shook your head, feeling your face heat up yet again.

Those names didn’t sound familiar at all, and yet Levi was acting as though you were missing some important piece of information.

“No. Should I?”

“They’re Ymir’s daughters, her direct descendants. When she died, they – how could you not know all of this?” Levi’s face was incredulous, the most animated you’d ever seen him.

“She never had…none of the stories…”

Try as you might, you couldn’t find the words. Any time you had a thought, it trailed off.

Ymir had a family? None of the stories you’d ever come across even slightly hinted at that. Maybe it was human error. After all, these stories were so old, and they weren’t exactly all yours to tell. People considered them myth these days, not as historical events. Eldia had only been a fairytale to you until yesterday. But something nagged at you. This absence of knowledge felt intentional, like you weren’t supposed to know about it.

You looked at Levi, feeling unnerved for some reason.

“The last time you were in my world, did the humans know about her daughters?” you asked.

Levi seemed taken aback by the question, but his face was slowly melting back into neutrality.

“I never asked about the full extent of how the myths were told, but knew that things were...altered. I just never knew how much. I was never exactly in direct contact with you people,” he said. It was such a vague answer, but you let it go for now, tucking the little information he gave you for later.

“Tell me more about the Three Nights, then. Why do you celebrate her daughters? And why at night?” you asked, attention fully on Levi.

“Because of what they had to go through when their mother died. They each had to stay up all night with Ymir’s remains. They had to do unspeakable things in order to inherit the Power of the Titan,” he said casually, eyes fixed ahead. “But they did it for us, to save us. They used the Power of the Titan to attempt to close all pathways between this world and yours.”

You blinked in surprise. Her daughters saved Eldians, from what? From humans? That’s what it sounded like. Levi was telling the story like Eldians had needed to be protected from humans, which meant removing access between realms. Or, the way he’d put it, attempted to remove. Clearly, there was still access.

At first, you felt an automatic sense of defensive come alive within you. How dare he, when the stories pointed to countless humans getting eaten or tortured by Titans! People kept these myths alive to remind humanity of what to fear.

But again, that feeling of being unnerved set in. Something about Levi’s version rang true, though you didn’t know why you should trust him, why you were trusting him, despite everything you’d been taught. Even if you’d originally believed it all to be nonsense, these stories were now the only thing you could reference to survive in this different place. And here was Levi, tearing all your knowledge to shreds and claiming it to be false. Maybe not directly, but it was obvious he was trying to steer you in another direction.

“So now you all celebrate them every year by staying up all night outside?” you prodded.

“You’ve got it a little backwards. Do you remember yesterday, when everyone was coming back into town from the forest after sundown? That’s because people are resting in temples together. None of our temples are within towns. And before you ask why,” Levi said, eyeing you, “it’s because the temples are meant to be tied to the earth somehow, as a separate haven from whatever nearest town or village there is. It’s a time to gather as a community and people like coming together to celebrate and rest under one roof. During the day, people all come together in the temple to start preparing their feasts and offerings to the altars that are built for each daughter before they sleep. At night, families go back home and fast until morning.”

You mulled over all this new information and this unique celebration. Instead of looking at Levi, your gaze turned towards the village. You were closer now, and the sun was lower in the sky, casting long shadows and golden light. It was strange, knowing it was completely empty.

“Seems like it would be cramped, all holed up in a temple together,” you said aloud, mostly talking to yourself. “That temple we were in, Norchek Temple, was nearly decrepit, and so small. It wouldn’t have fit an entire village inside.”

“The temples I’m talking about are Temples of the Titans,” Levi explained. “They’re dedicated to Ymir and her direct descendants, and they’re big enough to hold many people. However, in some places where the population is bigger, they’ll assign different days for different groups to rest, usually going by neighborhood. Temples like Norchek Temple are different.”

“How is Norchek Temple different?” you asked.

Levi sighed, then stopped walking. You stumbled at the quick change, but then turned to face him fully, a questioning look in your eyes.

“Embla.”

That’s all he said for a few moments, just that odd nickname for you. But you knew he wanted to say more, so you kept quiet. When he didn’t say anything else, even though there was clearly a storm brewing in his eyes, you spoke up.

“Levi, just tell me what you wanna tell me,” you whispered, a hand outstretched to reach out to him. However, he stepped back, which made your heart sting, and his eyes hardened.

“Humans have told their own version of our history for a very long time,” he said. “I’ve never involved myself much with humans, and for good reason. There's no point in explaining all of this to you. It’s pointless trying to make you see.”

“See what?!” you pressed, hands balling into fists.

“The truth,” Levi said, not giving in to your anger.

His answer fizzled out your anger, though, and your outstretched arm fell limp to your side. So, he really was trying to convince you that you’d been lied to all your life. That all humans had been lied to.

Your gaze slipped from his and you focused on the fields and lines of trees instead, deep and rich sunlight saturating their colors. The sun was going to set soon, and the village wasn’t much farther. Now, though, you weren’t so afraid of who you might run into.

Levi seemed to harbor some resentment towards humans. He was so hesitant to tell you anything at all about his world, and you wondered why. Wouldn’t he want to tell you the truth of Eldia, so that you could go back to your world and spread that truth? Did he think that it wouldn’t matter, because you wouldn’t be staying here long enough to give you enough of the truth to pass along?

Besides all of that, you were battling your own mind. You wanted the truth, but you had to admit that you were also scared of it. You were so sick of being scared all the time. You’d always thought you were just especially mindful of self-preservation, but now you were seeing it for what it really was: cowardice. This was a chance to learn something life-changing, and yet you were still shying away from it. Part of you wanted to keep the stories you’d been told and hold them in high regard. You wanted to keep believing that those stories were the most accurate, and not whatever Levi could tell you. Everything you thought you knew was crumbling in on itself, and you felt powerless and stupid and bared to the world in a way that made you uncomfortable. It made you feel like a blank slate.

“Let’s just keep going,” you mumbled, hating yourself. Such a coward, such a scaredy cat. You could have pressed Levi more, hounded him for answers, for the truth, but you didn’t.

You fell into step together and entered the outskirts of the village, where you learned the name of the village by looking at some signs.

“Ragako,” you breathed out, admiring the structures of the buildings and houses.

It was a small village and it seemed so open, with wide roads and plenty of space between buildings. Nothing at all like the town you’d been in before.

“What was the name of the other town?” you asked Levi out of curiosity. You never did find that out.

“Shiganshina,” he answered curtly.

You frowned at him, not appreciating the tone, but decided to steer the conversation a different way.

“We’ve been walking all day,” you complained, rubbing your grumbling stomach.

You’d aired this grievance earlier, around noon, when the beginning pangs of hunger struck you. Levi had merely grunted and only let you stop long enough to peruse through your backpack for a snack, but then told you to keep it moving and walk while you ate. The snack was barely enough to sustain you, and now your hunger was back with a vengeance, coupled with thirst.

“Stop being a crybaby. It’s not gonna kill you to wait a few more minutes until we get to Hange’s house,” Levi said, his grey eyes peeking at you from his peripheral vision.

“Hange,” you repeated, tasting the name in your mouth. “Finally, you tell me who we’re seeing.”

“You never actually asked,” Levi reminded you, and you felt your face grow a little hot. Technically, he was right. He doubled down by adding, “You spend all your time asking millions of questions, but never the right ones.”

You felt there was some sort of double entendre in what he’d said but you didn’t want to press him anymore.

Sure enough, as golden dusk cooled into pale twilight, you were standing in front of someone’s home. From far away, you could hear people emerging from the forest, their distant chatter sounding like coils of wind.

You were about to question whether Hange was even home, but Levi pounded roughly on the door and startled you into silence. Surprisingly, the door swung open to reveal someone, presumably Hange, with messy dark hair and glasses that were askew on their face.

“Levi?” they asked incredulously, sleepy eyes suddenly alert. Then, their gaze turned to you, their jaw immediately dropping. “Is this…?”

“A human? Yeah. Let us in before anyone else sees her.”

read part 3 here

[writertitan]

my first time ordering online from h&m and they lose my package in the mail 🥰 just in time for the holidays!!!!

[writertitan]

I never use this word, but this comment made me guffaw

[writertitan]

Perennial // Part 1

A/N: Hello! This is also being posted chapter by chapter on AO3. I'll be posting 2 to 3 chapters at a time here on Tumblr, just to keep things a little more condensed and organized for this platform. Enjoy!

pairing: levi x fem!reader

overall themes: fantasy AU, strangers to lovers, traveling through realms, explicit content

part 1 themes: traveling through realms, first meeting, reader's on the verge of a mental breakdown

word count: 4.9k

There was nothing left for you here and you knew that. Still, it was hard to look around at the place you’d called home for nearly five years and see nothing but pain and moving boxes. Your whole life was packed away in those boxes and yet there were still memories scattered around the house. The faded wine stain on the carpet from two years ago after you’d gotten too drunk and spilled a newly opened bottle was where it always was. On the top right corner of the front door, you could see the little flower your friend drew; you hoped the landlord wouldn’t notice it so that it could stay.

You’d lived here since you were 18 years old and now it was done.

The movers would be done soon. They were finishing up here and meeting you at your new place. Any second now, you’d be driving out of town to begin the newest chapter of your life.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to drive with you?”

You blinked and then there was Pieck, looking concerned and sad.

“I’ll be okay,” you assured her quietly, your arms hugging your torso. “Besides, it’ll be stormy soon. I know you hate driving in the rain.”

Her frown deepened and you knew she was going to press the issue with you, say something about how she’d drive in the rain for you any day, but you weren’t having it.

“I’ll share my location with you, so you know I made it safely. I’m kind of looking forward to the drive,” you said. It was a lie – you were dreading the drive. You were dreading this whole thing.

Pieck knew that but kept her mouth shut, nodding once with sympathetic eyes before turning her attention to the movers.

“Be careful with that box! It says ‘fragile’ on every side, can’t you read?” she nagged, stomping away to deal with them.

You smiled sadly and turned back to the front door, eyeing that little flower in the corner again. With a sigh, you bent down to grab your backpack from the floor, plucking your car keys from the top of it. You took off the apartment key and walked to the kitchen counter, leaving it there for your landlord, and you could feel tears sting along your lash line as Pieck approached you again.

“I’ll see you soon,” you promised her, pulling her in for a tight hug. She returned it and your heart broke at her sniffles.

“Be safe,” she whispered in your ear before breaking away, wiping her eyes. “I can stay here and see the movers out.”

You nodded and swallowed thickly, taking one last look around. You could only hope that the new tenants would make as many memories as you did. This was a good home, a good apartment. It had kept you safe for so many years.

Before you could really break down, you hurried out of the door with your backpack slung over your shoulder, smiling weakly at Pieck before closing the door.

Thunder rolled across the sky as you ran to your car, still parked in its designated space, and you took a deep breath as you unlocked it and tossed your backpack in the passenger seat. Just as you shut your door and put the key in the ignition, lightning flashed, and a few droplets of rain splattered across your windshield. You turned your car on and drove away from your home, and it took everything in your power to not look in the rearview mirror.

The rain started out as a drizzle, a peaceful and steady patter over your car that lulled you as you drove on the highway. You’d turned the radio on, keeping it at low volume, a mellow song playing quietly as your mind drifted between concentrating on the road and thinking about all the new changes in your life. It felt like you were always on the verge of spiraling these days.

As the rain picked up, your car also alerted you that you were low on gas, and you had to pull off the highway and enter the edges of a small town. The only option for gas that you could see was a dingy gas station, so it would have to do. Parking at a pump, you got out after pulling your hood up on your jacket, shivering as the humid, cold air hit your face. Usually, you liked the rain, but having to drive in it and get wet with a long drive still ahead was not helping your mood at all.

“Ah, fuck,” you cursed as you stood in front of the pump. There was a soaking wet note taped to the pump where the card machine was and, upon inspecting the only other pump available, saw that it held the same taped note.

CASH ONLY – PAY INSIDE.

Sketchy. So sketchy.

Still, you couldn’t make it that much farther on the little gas you had left, and there didn’t seem to be another option at the moment. However, one look at the gas station made you dubious that this was even a good option, either. The inside looked closed and desolate, and you weren’t sure you could see anyone inside.

You reached into your car to grab your backpack before locking it, just to be safe, and headed to the little gas station, where only dim fluorescent light flickered out from the windows, swallowed by the buzzing neon lights outside. The door wasn’t locked and so you entered slowly, a little startled when the bell above you jingled to signal your arrival. There was no one at the counter. Boring oldies music played faintly throughout the little store, and it smelled like someone had recently mopped. A good sign, then.

“Hello?” you called out, maybe not as loud as you could have, but hopefully loud enough that somebody could have heard you. It wasn’t like you were in a particularly large space.

You took another step toward the counter, wishing and yet dreading that someone would appear. To keep yourself occupied, you shrugged your backpack off your shoulder and unzipped the smaller pouch to grab your wallet, relieved to see that you had enough cash for a full tank.

However, you were still all alone, and another step towards the counter told you why.

Another note lay on the counter, this time with a different message that made you groan.

BACK IN 20 MINUTES.

How long that note had been there, you had no idea. However, considering it didn’t seem like someone had stepped away that long ago, you had some hope that the wait would be fairly short.

“As long as I’m here…,” you muttered to yourself, looking around. You were already running out of road trip snacks, so it would be smart to stock up again.

You perused each aisle, occasionally glancing back at the counter while you grabbed some chips, then some candy bars, before moving on to the drinks. As you took in the limited selection, fingers brushing over some off brand ginger ale, your ears perked up at a new sound. It wasn’t the sound of someone coming back to their post, but it was a sound you hadn’t noticed before. And it was indescribable. It was like a pulse, but more electric, but not like a buzzing sound. At first there didn’t seem to be an origin to it, but as you turned your head, you realized it was probably coming from outside.

It was like you couldn’t help yourself. You moved towards the door like you were possessed, feeling more and more in a daze the closer you got to the door. It didn’t make any sense, but you could have sworn that the door itself was the cause of the noise, and even though it was impossible, it looked off. It looked like it was warping, a little distorted if you looked too hard, but then back in focus once you realized something was wrong.

Without thinking, and without hesitation, you pushed it open.

You had no idea what to expect from opening the door. In fact, it hardly felt like it was your own choice at all, but more of a compulsion, like you had to do it.

At first, you were blinded by the neon lights outside, which didn’t make sense because they hadn’t been all that bright to begin with. But your vision was assaulted by those vibrant yellows and oranges and reds until you suddenly just felt…different.

You squinted your eyes to relieve them of the brightness, noticing that the pulsing sound seemed to be all around you, inside of you, in your head, until it all just stopped. The light slowly faded, until you were able to blink your eyes open again, and what you saw made no sense.

Your car was gone, the gas station pumps were gone. When you turned to look behind you, the dingy gas station was gone as well. In its place was a small wooden building painted red, with a white wooden door. When you tried to open it and go inside, you found it was locked. The only thing that proved you’d ever been inside a gas station was the armful of snacks you were still holding, which you promptly dropped out of pure shock.

“What the…,” you whispered. It was taking everything in you not to freak out.

This didn’t make any sense. Had you been drugged? Were you tripping out right now? Were you dreaming? Were you hallucinating? Were you dead?

You turned back around, blinking hard, but the view didn’t change. Your car was gone, the little road leading to the highway was gone, and now you were looking at a narrow street with colorful buildings pressed against one another, as if leaning on one another. If you weren’t so shocked, you would have admired how it looked.

You swallowed thickly, trying to get your bearings, and the only thing you could think to do was gather your dropped snacks and stuff them into your backpack, feeling a little bad that you’d taken them without paying. It was a silly worry, considering it should have been the last thing on your mind.

Fear and panic radiated down to your very bones as you stiffly craned your neck to look around, afraid to even take a step forward, but another attempt at the white door was useless. There was a window next to it, though it was impossible to look inside because a thick curtain blocked the view.

There was only one thing to do and you knew it. As much as you hated to admit it, you knew you had to venture out and figure out what was going on. The only way to get answers was to solve this very jarring and horrific mystery.

You weren’t the courageous type. Taking risks was nausea-inducing and having a predictable routine was your idea of nirvana. That’s why uprooting your entire life was more stressful and painful than you could admit out loud; the unknown had always been too scary. So this? This was going to fuck you up for life.

You swore loudly and banged on the door, the only time you’d allow your emotions to show physically, before taking a deep breath to calm yourself.

Once your backpack was securely on both shoulders, you gripped the straps tightly and took a tentative step forward, a shaky breath of relief leaving you once you realized you hadn’t exploded.

The street’s concrete was worn but looked sort of maintained, no potholes or deep cracks. You looked to your left, then to your right, unsure of which direction to go. To your left, the road and buildings seemed to open up around a circular marketplace, empty and quiet right now, which was unnerving. To your right, the street continued, even seemed to connect with other small streets and, in the distance, you could see that this little town eventually gave into a forest. That’s where you would go first.

“Wait…why would I go there first?” you asked yourself out loud, hesitating in the middle of the street. It seemed so counterintuitive, and yet…your heart tugged towards that forest. It looked so serene and inviting. Plus, there wasn’t much going on over at the market square.

The sun was setting, and a gorgeous golden glow bathed your surroundings, making you realize that it wasn’t raining anymore. Or, rather, it wasn’t raining here, wherever you were. Maybe it was still raining where you had been before.

As scared and wary as you were, you had to admit that this place emitted a very calm energy. Peaceful. Though you couldn’t find traces of a single other person as you walked, you could hear crickets and some birds singing to each other, echoing each other’s song. You peeled your hands off your backpack straps and pushed your jacket hood off your head, tilting your head up to the sky. It was a beautiful sunset, the colors rich and bleeding into each other effortlessly. It felt different from other sunsets you’d seen before, as if you’d only ever seen watercolor sunsets and this was your first oil painting.

You passed by a few other streets that formed intersections with the street you were on, paying no mind to them. The buildings all looked the same, crammed together and cozy and as picturesque as the next. As the sunset faded and twilight arrived, the part of town you were in grew darker, while something about the forest seemed to beckon you, because it seemed to come alive. As you looked around, you noted that the buildings that were all squished together didn’t have lights of any kind. The only things lighting your way were the old-fashioned streetlamps, flicking on one by one, as if guiding you towards your destination.

The fear that had ebbed and flowed within you was coming back now that night was approaching, and you quickened your pace, hands grasping at your backpack straps again. You surprisingly felt more relieved the closer you got to the forest. Fireflies swirled at the edges of the forest, where civilization met the trees and greenery, and a sense of invitation called you closer and closer. Birds still chirped, and the crickets were even louder, and everything seemed so vibrant even as the sunlight died.

And then, finally, as the stars twinkled and took the sun’s place, everything came to life.

It startled you, going from being all alone and scared to being surrounded by people and scared. They spilled from the forest and bustled around you, busy and determined and loud. Throngs of them emerged from the trees, laughter and chatter filling your ears. Fireflies flew around them, creating an amazing light show, but you felt stuck in place as everyone moved past you. You didn’t know what to do. You wanted to scream at the top of your lungs for someone to help you, but then what would you tell them? That you teleported? That you’d been drugged? That maybe you were on some alien planet after an alien abduction gone wrong?

You felt invisible. Everyone pushed past you and barely seemed to notice you at all. It didn’t matter that you radiated panic or that you looked scared and desperate for even an ounce of attention from somebody, anybody. And the more you looked at the people around you, the more you realized that they also seemed strange. They looked like normal people, yes, but were dressed oddly, nothing modern at all, but more like period costumes. Maybe this was some type of movie set? A weird Edwardian LARPING session?

When you tried to move, you found it difficult to maneuver around the swarms of people. Finally, when you pushed your way through the crowd to get some leeway, you drew attention to yourself. Suddenly, being ignored hadn’t seemed so bad, after all.

More and more eyes landed on you, staring in shock or confusion or both, and it made you shrink into yourself. Again, you wanted to use your voice and ask for help, but your throat felt like it had closed up so no sound could come out.

“Hey! What are you doing here?!” a voice asked, and then it felt like the crowd was closing in on you.

You gulped and then made a run for it, barreling past people and running fast, not even knowing where you were running, exactly. The only clue you got was hitting a few branches as you ran, a hint that you were entering the forest. Hopefully you could find some seclusion and get your bearings again, away from all those people.

So, you were unwelcome. That was good to know.

Eventually, the trees became larger and taller, and there were less traveled dirt paths to follow, and the sounds of people became faint. At the same time, it became darker, less fireflies and less moonlight reaching your eyes. That fear of the unknown pricked at your chest again. You dared to take a few steps farther before leaning against a gigantic tree trunk to catch your breath, tears pricking at your eyes.

What a horrible day. It felt like your mind was breaking. It didn’t even feel like any of this was real. Was any of this real? Why was everyone so…startled by you?

“There you are,” a voice spoke up from your right, making you jump in surprise and whirl your heard in that direction.

At first, you didn’t say anything, only took the sight of the man in. There was just enough light to see he had black hair and piercing eyes, a short but strong build, his gaze calm and collected, different from the shocked looks you’d been getting.

At last, you finally found your voice.

“Can you help me?” you asked, disregarding the way he’d greeted you, as if he’d been looking for you. “I’m…I’m lost, I think.”

“I’ll say,” the man scoffed, taking a slow step towards, probably in order to not frighten you more than you already were. “How did you even get here?”

“I don’t know,” you choked out, the tears coming back full force. “I think I was drugged or something, and then maybe someone tried to traffic me, or kidnap me? Because I was at a gas station and then suddenly, I was here instead, and all I did was open a door, and I didn’t pay for my snacks—”

The man lifted a hand in a gesture that was meant to shush you, and you did so immediately.

“What’s your name?” he asked.

“My name is…,” you began, your voice barely above a whisper, but you hesitated, unsure of whether or not you wanted to trust him. But there was no use in delaying it – you needed help.

But the man suddenly gave you a curious look, a look of bewilderment flashing through his grey eyes before it vanished just as quickly.

“Embla,” he muttered, sounding a little surprised.

“That’s definitely not my name,” you told him, confused at what he’d called you. But even when you told him your name, he seemed to disregard it.

“My name is Levi,” the man, Levi, said. “I can help you, but you have to trust me. Can you do that?”

Slowly, you nodded once, after a moment of thought. There was no other way. You couldn’t get out of this by yourself. You had no idea where you were or what was going on.

“Why are you helping me?” you asked, taking a step towards him.

It was his turn to ponder your question, until he eventually just shrugged. “I’ll ease you into everything as slowly as possible.”

That wasn’t much of an answer, but you let it slide for the time being.

“Everyone knows you’re here now, so we’re going to have to take some less traveled paths to get you someplace safe,” Levi explained.

“Why? Is it bad that I’m here?” you asked, worry creeping back into your bones.

“Not bad, per se, just…unexpected,” Levi answered, not looking at you. “Try not ask too many questions right now. It’s better if you dip your toes in. I think that’s the right phrase.”

It took a lot of willpower, but you swallowed back your millions of questions and let Levi lead you farther into the forest. You felt like you were rats in a maze, twisting around these enormous trees and tripping over logs and bushes and whatever else, until the trees began shrinking in size and volume and you finally stepped into a clearing.

You blinked in wonder, in awe at the vastness of the clearing.

Even in the night, the field was a rich green, pockets of wildflowers dotting it. Up above, the moon, full and bright, glowed proudly amongst the stars. Beyond the field, thin trees like the ones surrounding you subtly hid a very large lake that didn’t seem to end, it could have even been an ocean. Moonlight glinted off of it, and you were sure you saw fireflies dancing on the water’s surface. But in the middle of it was a short and bulky building. It looked more like a glorified shed than anything else, sitting on top of a small tuft of land that poked out from the water.

“That’s where we’re going,” Levi said.

The two of you stepped out into the field, the moon bright overhead, and you suddenly felt exposed. Strangely, you found yourself scooting a little closer to Levi, hoping for some added protection. You hadn’t come across any animals just yet, and you hoped it stayed that way. The last thing you needed was a run-in with a wolf. Or even something worse.

You tilted your head up to the sky, blinking once in surprise when you finally took a good look.

You’d never seen so many stars in all your life, and it seemed as though a falling star shot across the sky every couple of seconds. The moon looked so big, too. Had it always been this big? Or maybe in this place, the moon was bigger? The deeper you looked into the sky, you could have sworn you saw more…

“Hey. Embla,” Levi called out, snapping you out of your thoughts. “Keep up.”

You blinked again and tilted your head down to look at him. You hadn’t realized you’d stopped walking; you’d been so entranced with everything.

“Sorry,” you mumbled, jogging up to where he was and matching his pace, your eyes back on the lake and the little hut you were headed toward.

Then you realized what he’d called you, and you asked, “Why are you calling me that? I already told you my name.”

Levi seemed reluctant to answer you, and only gave you the brief response of, “It’s what you are.”

Huh. Maybe it was some term here in this strange place. But you didn’t know what it meant.

You pondered that for a while and then turned to Levi again, nodding your head in the general direction of the shed-thing, then asked, “What’s in there?”

“I told you not to ask too many questions,” Levi answered curtly, and you huffed a little in response, slightly offended.

“I’ve barely asked any even though I have a million of them,” you protested, frowning at him. You tripped a little on a small rock and felt your face grow hot, but Levi didn’t comment on that.

Levi debated for a moment, then gave you a sidelong glance as he answered, “That’s the Norchek Temple. It’s just a…pit stop. It’s going to take us someplace safe.”

“Take us someplace safe,” you repeated, a little confused. Was there some sort of underground tunnel there? You couldn’t even see a way to get to the temple from where you were, no bridge or boat of any kind. Did Levi expect you to swim? And why were you not safe where you currently were?

You mulled over his words as you approached the edge of the lake, your eyes scrutinizing the temple. Before you could say a word, a ripple in the water caught your attention, and you watched in disbelief as a small stone bridge slowly rose from the water. It rose high enough for the narrow path to not be submerged in water, and then it stopped, and the water was as still as if the bridge had always been there.

“Ladies first,” Levi said, and you hesitated for a moment, looking towards him with a scrunched-up brow.

“Is it safe?” you asked.

“Haven’t you ever heard the term ‘act now, ask later’?” Levi quipped, and you gave him a glare.

“I can’t say that I have,” you snapped back, but gulped down your fear and squeezed your backpack straps for comfort as you took a hesitant step onto the bridge. When you realized it would likely hold your weight, you stepped onto it with both feet, your pace already hurried as you crossed the narrow bridge. It was so narrow that you couldn’t stand side by side with Levi, but he was close behind.

As soon as the two of you stepped onto the small tuft of land harboring the temple, you turned to see that the bridge was lowering itself once again, slowly submerging itself back into the moonlit water. And, only a small ripple happened before the water was as still as ever, like nothing had ever disturbed it. You stood there, mesmerized by the way the surface reflected the night sky and those trillions of stars and meteors flashing by, until Levi cleared his throat and snapped you out of it.

“You have to keep moving,” he instructed. “Don’t get too moon-eyed over everything and freeze up like that. There’ll be plenty of time to do that later.”

He led the way into the temple, and you stayed quiet, taking in the wooden structure. The sun-bleached panels splintered and glistened with droplets of water, and the inside of the temple smelled humid, but also faintly of incense.

You could barely see inside the temple and felt that surge of panic inside of you again, gripping your insides and squeezing tight. You were so caught up in the panic that you accidentally bumped into Levi.

“Sorry,” you mumbled, a hand over your thumping heart. “I can’t see that well and I’m kind of freaking out.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Levi said.

A second later, you were surprised to see a glimmer of light in front of you. Your eyes adjusted until you could make out what was emitting the light: a mirror.

How strange. It didn’t help your panicky attitude at all.

“How is it doing that?” you asked, mostly to yourself, knowing Levi was probably going to be too vexed to answer another question.

There was something strange about the mirror, other than the fact that it was somehow lighting up the little room. It held your reflection in it, and you could see Levi right next to you, his arm brushing against yours, but it was like there was something behind your reflection. Like a two-way mirror.

All it took was two small steps to be right in front of it, close enough to reach up and tough the glass. Before you could do that, however, Levi’s fingers wrapped around your hand and yanked it back down to your side.

“Not yet,” he said, his reflection staring at you.

Still holding your hand, he outstretched his other hand towards the mirror, his eyes closing as though he were concentrating very hard on something. You were surprised to see him break out into a sweat, until slowly, the mirror began to emit even more light, until you also had to close your eyes.

“Do you feel it?” you heard Levi ask from beside you.

You were about to ask what he meant, since you felt nothing but anxiety, but then you paused. Something stirred in your chest and mind, like something was waking up inside of you. It felt familiar and you tried to place the feeling to no avail.

“I feel it,” you whispered, a hand moving to your chest.

It felt electric inside of you now, and somehow it felt loud, and –

You froze, recalling the last time you’d had this feeling. It was the same thing you’d experienced when you went from the gas station to wherever you were now.

“Step through,” Levi urged you, and you felt that prick of fear again, the fear of the unknown. You knew what he meant. Step through the mirror. It was some type of doorway. But your feet didn’t want to move at first, until the feeling got stronger inside of you and it felt like you were compelled to walk forward, a hand outstretched in front of you, waiting for the feeling of your fingertips pressing against glass, but it never came. Levi’s hand was the only thing that even felt tangible at that moment. The light snuffed out as soon as you felt yourself pass through some invisible barrier, and the electric feeling inside of you faded quickly. It felt too much like last time. Finally, you opened your eyes, and were stunned.

read part two here

[writertitan]

Hello cherubs!

I missed ya, I hope you’ve been well!!

With the end of AOT, it’s hit me hard. I’ve been away for a while too, for a whole lot of reasons, but not even one is because I wasn’t feeling it anymore. There’s so many stories to write out, just not enough time.

But while I’ve been away, I’ve been writing! I wanted to finish a fic in its entirety before sharing it with the world, and I’m proud to say I’m pretty much there!

There were lots of reasons for that, but who cares! What matters is that this is a fic that’s been tickling my brain since I started this writing blog, and it’s almost a relief to finally have it written out and ready to share.

What I want to ask is how YOU want to read it. I’d like to stick with weekly updates, and I want to mainly store it on AO3, but if you guys would like for me to post the chapters on Tumblr as well, or some other platform, I am happy to do it. I was pretty hellbent on using AO3 exclusively for a while, but let’s throw away tradition if that’s the vibe!!

Please let me know and please fill me in on all the life you’ve lived this year!!!