wtnvquotecollections

[wtnvquotecollections]

What has four legs in the morning, two legs at noon, and three legs in the evening? I don't know, but I have it trapped in my bedroom. Send help.

Proverb (Season 1, Episode 4, ‘PTA Meeting’)

[wtnvquotecollections]

Night Vale is an ancient place, full of history and secrets...as we were reminded today. But it is also a place of the present moment, full of life, and of us. If you can hear my voice speaking live, then you know: we are not history yet. We are happening now. How miraculous is that.

Cecil Palmer (Season 1, Episode 4, ‘PTA Meeting’)

[wtnvquotecollections]

That meeting will continue to address the important issue of backpacks, and whether or not they are causing autism. There will also be a memorial service for the 38 parents and teachers who lost their lives in the attack, followed by a raffle.

Cecil Palmer (Season 1, Episode 4, ‘PTA Meeting’)

[wtnvquotecollections]

Last year, Sandero only completed two out of 130 pass attempt—most notably, because he was in advanced staged of cerebral palsy, and because his throwing hand had been removed due to several overdue library books.

Cecil Palmer (Season 1, Episode 4, ‘PTA Meeting’)

[wtnvquotecollections]

Coach Nazr al-Mujaheed told reporters he's particularly excited for the progress junior quarterback Michael Sandero made during the off-season after that sentient lightning bolt struck him and give him the strength of two jeeps and the intelligence of a heavily concussed Rene Descartes.

Cecil Palmer (Season 1, Episode 4, ‘PTA Meeting’)

[wtnvquotecollections]

Finally, earlier we reported a death toll of zero, when in fact the number is closer to 38. We regret these errors.

Cecil Palmer (Season 1, Episode 4, ‘PTA Meeting’)

[wtnvquotecollections]

Proponents of the measure said the large yellow emblem and red lettering that spelled out 'DANGER. PLUTONIUM. DO NOT OPEN DOOR. RISK OF DEATH' were at worst an offensive eyesore and, at best, a hacky sci-fi cliché

Cecil Palmer [on removing a door from Radon Canyon] (Season 1, Episode 4, ‘PTA Meeting)

[wtnvquotecollections]

If you notice strange auras around any of the following objects in your house - blender, showerhead, dog, husband, wife, table, chair, doorknob, baseboard, vacation souvenirs or photos, collectibles of any kind, especially those depicting or involving horses, DVDs, especially Cliffhanger, There's Something About Mary, and The Wire 4thseason, and any bagged lettuce from California or Mexico - please, report to the council for indefinite detention.

City Council Message (Season 1, Episode 4, ‘PTA Meeting’)

[wtnvquotecollections]

We'll update you as further details surface in our special ongoing and very special coverage of Pteranodon Attack Gate. Are we safe from dinosaurs? No way.

Cecil Palmer (Season 1, Episode 4, ‘PTA Meeting’)

[wtnvquotecollections]

Remember: This is America.  Vote correctly, or never see your loved ones again.

Cecil Palmer (Season 1, Episode 4, ‘PTA Meeting’)

[wtnvquotecollections]

The Sun has grown so very, very old. How long cold, fading death? How long?

Cecil Palmer (Season 1, Episode 4, ‘PTA Meeting’)

[wtnvquotecollections]

Season 1 Quotes

Episode 1 (Pilot) 

a | b | c | d | e | f | g | h | i | j |

Episode 2 (Glow Cloud) 

a | b | c | d | e | f | g | h | i |

Episode 3 (Station Management) 

a | b | c | d | e | f | g | h | i | j | k |

Episode 4 (PTA Meeting) 

a | b | c | d | e | f | g | h | i | j | k |

Episode 5

Episode 6

Episode 7

Episode 8

Episode 9

Episode 10

Episode 11

Episode 12

Episode 13

Episode 14

Episode 15

Episode 16

Episode 17

Episode 18

Episode 19

Episode 20

Episode 21

Episode 22

Episode 23

Episode 24

Episode 25

[wtnvquotecollections]

Proverbs

Season 1

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 |13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25

[wtnvquotecollections]

Introduction Lines

Season 1

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 |13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25

[wtnvquotecollections]

There is a special place in Hell. Its really hip. Very exclusive.

Proverb (Season 1, Episode 3, ‘Station Management’)

[wtnvquotecollections]

Just the other night, I stopped by Big Rico's. I was in the mood for a delicious pizza slice, and since Big Rico's is the only pizza place in Night Vale that has not burnt to the ground in an unsolved arson case - and did I mention is also the best pizza in town...

Cecil Palmer (Season 1, Episode 3, ‘Station Management’)

[wtnvquotecollections]

Let's have a look at traffic. Oh. Wow. Well, that looks pretty good. Yup. Yees. Okay, not too bad there either, I see. Oh! That gentleman needs to slow it down! It is not a race, my friend! Not a literal one, anyway. That has been traffic.

Cecil Palmer (Season 1, Episode 3, ‘Station Management’)