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u/tobythepuppy on reddit

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TW: talk of SH, talk of impure regression, talk of addiction.

Having a little one who struggles with self harm can mean so many things. it can mean helping them when they’re having urges. It can mean cleaning their wounds for them. it can mean helping them through impure regression. it can mean bandaging their wounds. it can mean keeping them safe. it can mean holding them close when they’re breaking down. it can mean that sometimes even if you did your best, the urges can get the best of them. And even though that feels terrible, it isn’t your fault. it doesn’t mean you’ve failed as a carer. it doesn’t mean you’re a bad carer. it doesn’t mean you’re not good enough. You can be there for them the best you can, for as long as you can. But sometimes the urges win. If it’s an addiction, it makes it harder. but having a little one who struggles with self harm is hard on both of you. You both would need to understand that you did/are doing your absolute best. That’s all anyone can ask for.

just remember that you are loved, you are worthy, you are enough. you are doing your best and no matter what i’m proud of you. You are a good carer. You are a good little. you’re doing amazing.

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i should send this to my daddy, he gets insecure too

a message to insecure littles/caregivers♡´･ᴗ･`♡

🌸 your caregiver/little still loves you even when they are busy.

🌸 your caregiver/little still love you even if they have other friends that they talk to. i promise, they haven’t forgotten about you.

🌸 your caregiver/little still loves you even if they can’t talk in that exact moment.

🌸 your caregiver/little still loves you even if they can’t reply immediately

🌸 they still love you even though they can’t talk to you 24/7. i promise, they haven’t forgotten about you.

🌸 they still love you even if you don’t like some of the things about yourself.

“why aren’t they replying?!!”

MAYBE:

• they fell asleep

• they are working

• they are at school

• they saw your message, but got distracted and forgot to reply.

• they are sleeping

• they are studying for a test, or doing homework

THEY STILL LOVE YOU

“my caregiver/little is being distant!”

MAYBE:

• they are going through a hard time

• maybe they are hurt by something you said (this isn’t always the case, but it is always important to talk it out instead of avoiding the problem.)

• they are extremely busy with work/school

THEY STILL LOVE YOU

“i said something that hurt them”

we all make mistakes. try apologizing and talking it out. make sure they know you still care about them.

“something they said hurt me”

explain your feelings, maybe they didn’t intentionally hurt you. explain to them why it made you feel the way it did, and talk it out. they’ll understand.

“i’m so scared they will leave me”

this is your paranoia speaking. if they really, truly do love you they aren’t going anywhere anytime soon. you’ll be able to tell if they love you or not, trust me.

in order to have a healthy caregiver/little (agere) relationship, or any relationship for that matter, you must trust your partner. without trust, the relationship will be extremely hard for the both of you. we all get anxious at times, and being jealous is a normal emotion, but you must let your caregiver/little have friends. once you try controlling who your partner can and can’t talk to, the relationship can become toxic. if you have anxiety revolving something your caregiver/little is doing, talk it out. you must also understand your caregiver/little will not be able to talk to you constantly. and this is okay. just like you do, they also get busy at times. just know that no matter what they’re doing, or who they’re with, they love you endlessly. ( ˘ ³˘)♥

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stuffies n journaling