xanzley - Tumblr blog

[xanzley]

U have problems

in case anyone was curious, the usps will send you a roll of 100 cremated remains stickers for free

you do not need to pay shipping they will just send it to you. for free

[xanzley]

cream pie slut sluts u

w h a t

[xanzley]

would die for a fresh hot corn on the cob rn

[xanzley]

My asshole is to scrumptious for u

Stark: do it again! do it again! do it again!

Xanzley: no, you’re not getting a picture of this miraculous asshole

[xanzley]

i want one just to break

"C'mon Olympians it's bedtime, time to go to your anti fuck beds!"

[xanzley]

Huh

two…

[xanzley]

what the fuck is this

New genders just dropped.

[xanzley]

okay so what if Tony Stark just said... "I am..." then snapped his fingers and died

[xanzley]

sir please don't

12:30am - a child has appeared at my front door not too sure if i should get my 12 gauge and shoot it or drop kick it to my neighbors house

[xanzley]

When Tumblr goes premium let’s all use one account like netflix

[xanzley]

hey calm down u little gremlin

12:30am - a child has appeared at my front door not too sure if i should get my 12 gauge and shoot it or drop kick it to my neighbors house

[xanzley]

12:30am - a child has appeared at my front door not too sure if i should get my 12 gauge and shoot it or drop kick it to my neighbors house

[xanzley]

no problem DICK PILLS

[xanzley]

Cobra chickens (Canada geese) are like Canada’s version of the Bear Pig (Boars)

Change my mind

[xanzley]

i stg ill do this

used to date a guy who was 6'4 and I'm 5'2 and one time we were arguing and he took a picture of me from his eye level to show me what I looked like from his perspective and honestly that was so disrespectful

[xanzley]

they launched a dick into space yesterday... lmao the rocket looks like a penis too

[xanzley]

btw i want a fucking barrel stuffed with white people not a building with barrels and white people in it

CRACKER BARREL ISN’T A BARREL FULL OF WHITE PEOPLE WHAT THE FUCK THIS IS FALSE ADVERTISING