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I don't even play Deltarune so I'm relating this to my own personal situation and then the end just kind of slapped me out of nowhere, fandom is wild like that

I've seen what happens when people Get Worse. I've orbited a lot of people who Got Worse (especially online). If you listen to people who Got Worse it's all the same: they don't have consistent, meaningful social support, they've been hurt too many times and they can't open up out of fear that the next betrayal is going to drive the knife right through the artery, they end up spending too much time alone and develop secret languages, meanings, thought cycles completely inscrutable to anyone who has never had to rely on such rituals to survive, they get caught in a cycle of reopening and licking their wounds because the progression of time is so unrewarding and stagnant that the past is basically always the present, and the present is already the future, they become mean, they become strange.

some people might offer to help them but it's rare they ever know where to start, let alone exhibit compassion without grimace. admittedly, even for genuinely compassionate people, it isn't the easiest thing. if the person is someone who is stuck in their ways or doesn't know you, they don't really have a reason to be receptive to your help. "why should I waste my time on someone who is just going to become another memory of heartache? someone who will carelessly hurt and abandon me?" and such. an earnest attempt to help can feel like an attempted assault to them. at the same time, the meaningful interpersonal relationships that these people need will not survive if built on pity or fleeting self-gratifying feelings of "building" someone into your idea of a desirable person.

I don't know where I was going with this, but I always found it hard not to see myself as only a few degrees removed from these people. one or two safety nets separated from being completely trapped. unable to feel safe in not just the world but also my own body. a cosmological dead end. I stay away from habitually engaging in the obvious things can that make trying to change when you're at this point difficult (alcohol, drugs, etc), but if temperance is how you maintain stability in the face of rock bottom, you're basically already there, right? you're there and your body just hasn't caught up. maybe I'm just being dramatic because it's late. hows everypony finding the new deltarune chapters.

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It's the Gen z/Gen alpha version of "you're a poser"

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Hey wait-

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I have put every one who has ever hurt me in their place. Either by no contact or giving them exactly what they give me.

I may be lonely but I am not weak. I am resilient goddammit, and the things I've been fighting for my whole life are going to be mine! I may still long for the grave, I will forever grieve my little goose. But I can do those things with joy in my heart, and a love for life I didn't have before. Death and child loss did not destroy me. Domestic abuse did not destroy me. Global imperialism has not destroyed me and I will keep healing to fight the bigger and biggest fights we have bc that's my JOB. To learn how to do better and teach others.

Yes I'm ranting but GOD HE TOLD ME TO NEVER CONTACT HIM AGAIN THANK FUCK THANK FUCK THANK FUCK

I might actually be free from this cycle. Hot fucking dog. My ex might leave me alone for good. I'm joyful. I'm so fucking joyful. Fucking freedom and I can taste it for the first time. The joy is in the world, even when it sucks. Oh god, thank you universe.

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I might actually be free from this cycle. Hot fucking dog. My ex might leave me alone for good. I'm joyful. I'm so fucking joyful. Fucking freedom and I can taste it for the first time. The joy is in the world, even when it sucks. Oh god, thank you universe.

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"I'm sorry. Did I come too late?"

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my soft and comfortable mama

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This Too Shall Pass

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I saw myself in the mirror

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It's fun hearing white people say that stuff in rural communities, where they also have less access to resources and systems to help them. The brainwashing of white America is something that needs to be deeply analyzed after the fall of the Empire.

As a society we have benefited so much from successful public health measures that we now have the privilege of declaring that we must not need them anymore

Bitch before enriched flour, neural tube defects like spina bifida were far more common. Even now, spina bifida clinicians and researchers are begging to have salt and maize fortified to reach groups that don’t use as much flour. Before iodized salt, the United States had a fucking GOITER BELT. Eleven years after the introduction of fluoridated water, a city in Michigan found the rate of dental caries among school children dropped a staggering 60%— in an era where tooth decay regularly fucking killed people

I’m literally not even going to start on vaccines, which are among the most successful and robustly studied public health measures in world history

You might say “oh well today we all have access to vitamins and toothpastes and dentists so we don’t need those things in our food supplies” and boy do white people on social media loooove to fucking say that. But here’s the thing: no, people don’t all have easy access to those things. That’s privilege talking yet again

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The child is not even two pounds, he is in the intensive neonatal care unit. He is blind, may be unable to walk and he may not survive at all. Adriana Smith's mother, April Newkirk has affirmed that the decision to stop life support should have been the family's. The baby's name is Chance. Fuck Brian Kemp, I hope he gets sepsis.

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