xenviaz

[xenviaz]

Lol feeling like disappearing for 7 days or 12 months

[xenviaz]

I saw your name pop up on my screen and I felt everything over again.

[xenviaz]

“I’m not a whole person and I don’t think I ever will be. parts of me had died in the house I grew up in and I visit them in dreams.”

-Unknown

[xenviaz]

I never planned on making it this far in life

[xenviaz]

I grew up believing that I was hard to love — and that any sort of kindness was lost on someone like me.

[xenviaz]

I‘m too young to be stressed like this.

[xenviaz]

been in such a bad mental space that i can’t even write nor say anything, it’s so exhausting just to wake up and going through the day

i would rather sleep, sleep forever

[xenviaz]

I don’t feel sad, I just feel broken

Like I want to cry all the time but I’m still kinda numb and it hurts but if I fake a smile I sometimes don’t feel it and I don’t even want to feel happy again

[xenviaz]

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀𖡔 ׅ ᰍ ֺ 𝗅𝗈𝖼𝗌 𝗈𝗋 𝖻𝗂𝗈 𝖽͟𝖺͟𝗋͟𝗄 ゚ ִ ✺ ᵎᵎ

ㅤ © ( '𝚜𝚛. ) caos ¡ 𝖌ore place

ㅤ 𝒉.ell p𝗵ob‌i‌c , '♰ classic dirty

ㅤ 𖤌‌ ￤¡𝐌𝐀𝐍𝐈𝐀𝐂𝐐𝐔𝐄!

ㅤ 地獄男孩 ٬ 𝟵𝟳 𝖡𝖮𝖸

‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌٬ㅤ我是一个说谎的男孩 𓆤

‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌⸺ㅤ+𝟭𝟴 ﹕ ❪ 𝖎𝗍𝖺𝗅𝗒‌ ❫ 𝗦𝗗

‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌𝕾𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐓𝐔𝐀𝐑𝐘 † 𝖾𝗅𝖾𝗀𝖺𝗇𝖼𝖾

🔞̷̷̷̸⃟ ׁ ִ 𔒒 ׁ 𝐃̷̸𝐈̸̸̷͟𝐀̷̸𝐁̷̸̷𝐋̶̏͞𝐎̷̷̸ㅤ: ❪ 𝟗̷̸̶𝟕̷̸͞ㅤ ,ㅤۻ

update car ᵎᵎ like or reblog if use/save.

[xenviaz]

᳝ ꒷ #bio ideas ! ⚠︎

i♯ ↳ she/her # 𝐝anger. ꜛꜛ𝐠.𝐨𝐝 ꗃ

#𝐇𝐀𝐄𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐍 luvbot ⊹ ↺ she-her ꗃ fan acc

locked. please scan code ↺ │█║▌║▌║ │█║▌║▌║ unlocked (name) ꗃ ## the me of yesterday and the present !i ↺ ⚠︎ danger !i love me not ⌫ ▸▸ my letter to you. ᵎ 📷

━━━ LIKE OR REBLOG ━━━ FOLLOW FOR MORE ━━━ IG : @44biba

[xenviaz]

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀𖡔 ׅ ᰍ ֺ 𝗅𝗈𝖼𝗌 𝗈𝗋 𝖻𝗂𝗈 𝖽͟𝖺͟𝗋͟𝗄 ゚ ִ ✺ ᵎᵎ

ㅤ © ( '𝚜𝚛. ) caos ¡ 𝖌ore place

ㅤ 𝒉.ell p𝗵ob‌i‌c , '♰ classic dirty

ㅤ 𖤌‌ ￤¡𝐌𝐀𝐍𝐈𝐀𝐂𝐐𝐔𝐄!

ㅤ 地獄男孩 ٬ 𝟵𝟳 𝖡𝖮𝖸

‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌٬ㅤ我是一个说谎的男孩 𓆤

‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌⸺ㅤ+𝟭𝟴 ﹕ ❪ 𝖎𝗍𝖺𝗅𝗒‌ ❫ 𝗦𝗗

‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌𝕾𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐓𝐔𝐀𝐑𝐘 † 𝖾𝗅𝖾𝗀𝖺𝗇𝖼𝖾

🔞̷̷̷̸⃟ ׁ ִ 𔒒 ׁ 𝐃̷̸𝐈̸̸̷͟𝐀̷̸𝐁̷̸̷𝐋̶̏͞𝐎̷̷̸ㅤ: ❪ 𝟗̷̸̶𝟕̷̸͞ㅤ ,ㅤۻ

update car ᵎᵎ like or reblog if use/save.

[xenviaz]

𝐒𝐇𝐄 ⋗ 𝐇𝐄𝐑  (your pronouns)

ま  あなたとの

甘い夜 赤ちゃん  ㊕

ぼくの アーティスト ★

𝗅𝖾𝗌 𝖾́𝗍𝗈𝗂𝗅𝖾𝗌 𝗌𝖾 𝗌𝗈𝗇𝗍 𝗋𝖾́𝗎𝗇𝗂𝖾𝗌

𝖾𝗍 ont 𝖿𝗈𝗋𝗆𝖾́ 𝗅𝖺 𝗉e𝗋𝖿𝖾𝖼𝗍𝗂𝗈𝗇

𝗊𝗎𝖾 𝗍𝗎 𝖾𝗌t.

##  𝖵𝖠𝖭𝗧𝗘.𝗧𝗘

𖤍 𝐒𝐖𝐄𝐄𝐓 𝐃𝐄𝐌𝐎𝐍

      𝑓𝑟 .   good вoy.

我想愛我（哦）

你愛我的方式（哦）

哦，為了我所有的漂

從你的角度來看我.

𝐒𝐇𝐄 ⋗ 𝐇𝐄𝐑  (your pronouns)

綺  𝐒𝐖𝐄𝐄𝐓 '𝐍𝐃 𝐏𝐒𝐘𝐂𝐇𝐎

心を引き裂くためだけに心

を引き離し、役割を演じるた

めだけに顔を出すこれらすべ

𝐒𝐇𝐄 ⋗ 𝐇𝐄𝐑  (your pronouns)

• others pronouns with this 𝐟𝐨𝐧𝐭

𝐇𝐄/ 𝐇𝐈𝐌

𝐙𝐄/𝐇𝐈𝐑/𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐒 or 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐘

[xenviaz]

:: dark bios ♡ ;

─ heart ♡ or reblog if u save; ̖́-

— 𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐃𝐑𝐈𝐕𝐄 ⌗ ; s-her. 🔌 ⩇⩇:⩇⩇ name ♥︎ 𝖒𝖎𝖘𝖋𝖎𝖙𝖘 💀♤

✄﹔𝕸𝖔𝖙𝖔𝖗𝖍𝖊𝖆𝖉 📎 ﹪ ☆★ ♯ they/them ↺ 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐤𝐢𝐥𝐥 !!

❑ :: name ، ✦ 𝖘𝖍𝖊/𝖍𝖊𝖗 💣 ❝ 𝐃𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍… 𓏴 ♢

▬ ★ ??￤𝐖𝐄 𝐀𝐑𝐄 𝐍𝐎𝐓 ꜜ 𝖞𝖔𝖚𝖗 𝖐𝖎𝖓𝖉. 🎥 name 𓌹 𓌺

▞▞▞▞▞▞▞▞▞▞▞▞

[xenviaz]

I havent been on tumblr in forever but heres some progress photos: plz dont report just block and/or scroll, i am pro recovery

[xenviaz]

ED tips - calories that don’t count

so, just a reminder to myself and to all of calories that don’t need to be counted:

ever:

meds

vitamins

food that needs to be taken with those meds/vitamins

when you’re sick/recovering from being sick:

fluids - the only time i’ll ever say drink your calories. drinking straight water not only tends to bother your stomach, but also it’s not healthy to just have water, esp if you’re throwing up. gatorade, juices, anything to get your fluids up and also help with salt/electrolytes.

small amounts of carbs throughout the day - having just fluid in your stomach will make it way more likely you’ll get sick. please try to eat very small amounts of carbs at least when you’re drinking to help it stay down.

meds/food with meds - obviously meds are never counted, but meds for sickness tend to require more food, especially for stuff like antibiotics, or you’ll get some really bad aches and cramps. try to eat at least a few ozs of bland starchy food, like bread, crackers, pasta, etc. I know it’s hard, but your body really needs it.

try not to count at all when you’re sick/getting over being sick. you’re almost guaranteed to lose or stay the same anyway, and your body really needs certain things to recover properly. being sick with EDs already sucks enough. try to be kind to your body.

[xenviaz]

Let's talk about the anorexia-stereotype of doing everything perfectly

They typical anorexic is shown as the perfect, smiling student, studying the whole night, getting perfect grades, doing workout after workout and never eating

And while that may be true for some, in my experience most people are totally different from what's known as the perfect anorexic.

For me it's struggling the whole day and night, if I should eat, what I should eat.

It's struggling to even get up because your body can't take starvation anymore.

It's sleeping the whole day, because you're missing nutrients and you were kept awake by your thoughts the whole night.

It's being freezingly cold, which results in you not being able to do anything with your fingers for example writing.

It's the time consumption taking everything away from you. Your family, your hobbies, your school work.

It's binging that makes you feel like you failed as an anorexic.

Not only your organs failing but also your will to live, your energy, your grades, your hygiene, your hobbies, your friends, your family.

Stop expecting perfection from someone with an eating disorder.

[xenviaz]

The law of attraction & weight loss 🌿Manifesting🌿

One of the best ways to use the law of attraction for weight loss is to act “as if” and create positive expectations through the practice of gratitude, the use of affirmations or positive self-talk, and the power of visualization.  

Write down the features/weight etc. you want to have as if you already have them. This is a very powerful message to the universe and to your sub-conscious mind.

Once you have your affirmation list, look at it every day, best is in the morning before you start your day (while you are drinking your green tea!) and even better, all throughout the day and before you go to bed. To go with your written affirmations, visualize yourself as the thin person you are.

Visualize yourself in the clothes you want to wear, feel it, be it! This is an important part of weight loss, do not skip this step, it really helps! The more you do this, the easier your weight loss will be.

It is so important to do things that make you feel good about yourself during this time.

Be kind to yourself. Don’t beat yourself up if you fall off the health wagon and overeat. Just get right back on and continue. You deserve it and you are worth it. Congratulate yourself on the big and small victories and successes.

Look in the mirror everyday and say “Love You” and mean it, no matter where you are with your weight loss goals!