y-rhywbeth2

[y-rhywbeth2]

I remember reading somewhere that elves can go days between reveries and maintain more function than a human would without sleep (probably one of Elaine Cunningham's novels). Probably not very healthy, but doable.

Something elven Durges might do to avoid 'father-child bonding time' at night. And then probably develop psychosis from sleep deprivation, which is a delightful(!) experience recommended for absolutely fucking nobody. Especially if you take reality and blend it with waking Bhaal visions.

[y-rhywbeth2]

Lae'zel: 'Well then. Seems lava has more uses than I'd considered. And I've considered a lot of them.' - Astarion: 'That worked. Following instructions is a mug's game. [...] I should incinerate things more often.'

I have concerns about Lae'zel in retrospect (are you going to elaborate, or...? No?), and Astarion going forward. Not that I ever doubted he was the kind of guy who doesn't read the instructions ever, but.

[y-rhywbeth2]

Gale: 'Look at that idol. Silvanus is an ancient and powerful god. I'm sure the magic inside it is... delicious.'

Gale, I've already got Astarion talking about drinking Lathander's blood, I don't need two people in the party trying to cannibalise the Powers.

[y-rhywbeth2]

Oh hey, I've never gotten the dialogue where the Urge reacts to recruiting Wyll:

Narrator: *Evil sets upon your thoughts. Killing a legend could make you a famous villain indeed. Death or Glory, Wyll? This way lies only death...*

Bhaal: 'Hey, what if we kill all your new friends? It's just, I don't think you should have any, is the thing.'

[y-rhywbeth2]

While, in theory, they could be providing their own divine magic, for Durge to classify themselves as a ranger (and also they're using the WIS stat, not CHA, so it's not innate casting) they must have picked up the worship of somebody to get spells from at some point on that trip.

While that could be anybody, tying it into my 'any port in a storm' Jergali conversion could be funny.

Ranger Durge, praying to Jergal for spells; Withers in the background doing his paperwork, 'not my usual division, but sure. whatever.' Unless his immortal-shanking assassins sometimes take the ranger class, since I guess that works.

(Jergal's Lower Plane ties and sketchy nature and tendency to make mysterious dark pacts even in the 14th century gives me Oathbreaker patron vibes, too)

[y-rhywbeth2]

Gale being directed to pickpocket:

Gale: I feel apologetic already. Gale: How rude. Gale: Your wish is my regret. Gale: I was raised better than this.

Tara's disapproval transcends time and space and she's telling your mother over their next brunch.

[y-rhywbeth2]

Everybody's welcome to talk about their ocs while reblogging or replying to my posts, incidentally. Not that anybody needs permission, but sometimes people apologise or delete it after doing so, but you don't have to if you want to talk about them.

[y-rhywbeth2]

BG3 essentially issued a challenge to design a WoD character for a D&D setting. Not that D&D doesn't do dark sometimes, but the sheer level of edges in Durge's family and backstory...

[y-rhywbeth2]

Giving Durge a weird relationship to undead minions as a mirror to Gortash and his machines. (Come to think of it, Orin's 'dollies' might work as a mirror too).

[y-rhywbeth2]

I'd like to give my Durge and Orin some kind of bond where on some fucked up level they care about each other, but tbh I'm pretty sure Orin just hates and envies Vel, and Vel never thought her existence relevant at all except as a source of pathetic amusement. Canon does not dissuade me.

(Is there a word for when you'd high five a character for stabbing the oc you (kinda) made?)

[y-rhywbeth2]

Just as android autocorrect proclaims Shar's real name to be Sharron, so it has revealed to me Bhaal's true name: Basil.

I don't know where it's getting that, but there it is.

[y-rhywbeth2]

My headcanons for Durge are worse than BG3 explicitly shows, but I do genuinely feel that Bhaal wouldn't hold back in cruelty. Bhaal doesn't accept the word 'no' from his clergy. He reduces people to feral killing machines as a matter of course, he absolutely would inflict it on Durge as a warning/punishment, and Sceleritas tells you (even if Chosen, even when in favour as the Five were) that Bhaal wants you to have kids (it's a sin not to) so guess what? Lie back and think of the world of death to come, you're having kids.

[y-rhywbeth2]

@sheepshapedfluff If you want to talk about pre-amnesia Vel/Urge 👀

Questions you may regret. Also worth noting that Bhaal is an anthropomorphic manifestation of evil and I do not believe he would fuck around about it either, and Durge was also an absolute monster too, so a lot of my headcanons for Vel are flat out horrific/disgusting.

Once got into a feud with Cazador after a few of the Bhaalist acolytes went 'missing' too close to the subterranean entrance to his stupid secret basement. The feud was carried out by proxies and passive aggressive letters, so Cazador doesn't know Vel by face. -

Had a retinue of undead formed from the dead of the Undercity and the temple crypts and was significantly more gentle and kind to them than to anybody else. -

They are genuinely an elf, having been brought about using the divine essence of the Seldarine, unfortunately this innate sensitivity to life just stresses them out and makes them more violent. -

They were 'born' in 1362, the result of a combination of Irenicus' attack on Suldanesselar, the ritual utilising the Mana Forge, and the essence in the Winding Waters. -

Spent most of their childhood in-and-out of what was basically therapy and psych evaluations. Priests, diviners, monks, anybody who might be able to explain to their desperate parents what was wrong with their child and how to help them: what with the voices, the 'monster in the hat' that lurked in the shadows and told them things when nobody was around, the 'accidents' that happened to other kids and their siblings and cousins and the family pet... -

Got along well with Elda, over their shared love of people shutting the ever loving fuck up. Grimlark was relatively close to being a childhood friend and they had a shared love of poetry. Velki was permitted to have the skins of his kills 9/10 times. -

They were adopted by House Immeril, a sun elven merchant family based out of Evereska. Their blesséd (immediate family like parents, not just the house at large) were part of the House commoners and named them 'Alune' - if you ever bring up that given name around them they will kill you, slowly, viscerally and painfully and then resurrect you to do it all over again. -

Still haven't decided on the alter egos, but I know one of them ran in Upper City social circles and it made Gortash's getting to know them kind of hilarious in retrospect when he realised. Durge already knew him, Gortash didn't realise they'd met like three times yet (though he knew all of them were Bhaalist contacts). -

I'm using older variants of elven aging, so Vel was physically 15 when Orin was born and she grew up with them already a prominent figure in the Church and they played a recurring role in her nightmares as a child (her mother already tried to kill her, why wouldn't they?) Vel didn't pay any attention to Orin at all, because Vel figured she wasn't going to live to adulthood. Besides, they'd once had a rapport with Helena and held enough of that lingering friendship to resent her death. They were begrudgingly impressed when Orin not only survived but also dethroned Sarevok. -

Wanted to be a bard, adored their older brother and sister, did get bullied a bit for being adopted and not knowing their lineage (a major part of elven culture). -

Remember Raphael having his little 'I'M NOT MORTAL' tantrum? That was the Dark Urge once the indoctrination set in. Don't you dare suggest that they're powerless or a living person. -

Didn't just walk into the temple as a child prophet and get proclaimed Chosen. Little Alune had to start out as a novice, like everybody else and learn the doctrine and the rules and work his/her way up to membership amongst the Cowled Death, served as First Murder, then Primate underwent initiation into the Bretheren of the Keen Strike, leaving Sarevok to take over as Primate, and then got installed as the first new High Primate by which point Orin had usurped Sarevok. -

The childhood identity and name was abandoned on taking vows as a Deathdealer and entering the clergy. The Dark Urge will insist that that child was a fiction in the first place, and that family was no connection to them and it was their own foolishness for believing the illusion that damned them. -

Their family loved them dearly, and they lived all their life absolutely crushed by the guilt and self-hatred for killing them. Ketheric, while actually a shitty parent, had the privilege of getting Alune's father projected onto him and so became the proxy for; 'Hurt me! I deserve it! While I hurt you, because fuck you and especially fuck your stupid daughter for bringing these feelings up again!' -

Alune tried to kill herself repeatedly after the death of her parents. This was, from Bhaal's perspective, a bit like waiting out a temper tantrum. Except the tantrum is various forms of death and the waiting is just repeatedly shoving them back into life until they get the hint that the only way of coping with existence is blind obedience. -

Having started off on the poorer end of the elven class scale, then moved down to human poverty, then homelessness; Vel got their first taste of what it's like to have disposable income after joining the clergy and went a bit nuts chasing whatever highs they could get. Over the decades everything got stale and once you've reached the top everybody is a bit of a yes-man. And then that annoying Banite started taking them on increasingly insane adventures (the Hall of Wonders; Cania; the Lowerdark...) and they realised that holy shit, this is the first time they've had fun in eight decades! -

-------------------------------- Following this comes the reproductive horror and co. - - -

The Urge had a weird and extremely disturbing parasocial relationship with Isobel as a concept. The way Durge can kill her in Act 2 would be the least of her problems. Ketheric, quite understandable, would not let them near her corpse. -

Their time struggling with poverty and class-based oppression in human lands led them to believe humans were cruel and less evolved than elves and lead down the path of elven supremacy. Time with the Eldreth Veluuthra revealed that elves were just as shit, actually. Turns out everyone sucks and everywhere is inherently corrupted. -

Did not acquiesce easily to being Bhaal's puppet and went through a rebellious stage on account of still having morals at the time when it was decided s/he should join the faith now. Bhaal's response was 'ok, if you won't be my vessel as a weapon you can be - as your brother would put it - my womb.' Anyway, one two-year-long trip to being completely stripped of all autonomy, reduced to a feral animal and forced through pregnancy later, plus a newborn skull bashed open on the nearest surface at the end of it, Vel never questioned Bhaal ever again and coincidentally also stopped using she/her and developed extreme misogyny. And misandry, but in a slightly different sense. (Post-amnesia it's less severe, but Vel still gets uneasy around talk of AFAB biology, or the months he has to have that biology and being reminded of that). -

Can the world hurry up and die, already?? -

The Urge did not bother protesting Bhaal's demand for grandkids and had a lot of kids when the clergy told them to hop to it, none of them carried by them (unless they'd fucked up which became increasingly rarer). None of them survived to see age 10, most of them died in their parent's womb by knife (assuming the selected 'breeding partner' survived the babymaking process to begin with). Sarevok: 'Do you realise we need at least one of these to survive?' Durge, throwing their 'partner's' excavated uterus in the temple brazier: 'Can't hear you over the screaming!' -

Spent 80 years cobbling together a coping mechanism out of alcohol, opiates*, narcissism (in the clinical sense), depersonalisation, and the high of the Ecstasy of Murder to create this kind of dissociative haze where they were untouchable and felt fine and 'Father Loves Me and anything he does to me is fine because I'm not real anyway. But also, as an' extension of Him, disrespecting me is blasphemy.' Do not bring them out of their happy place. *The convenient thing about Bhaal refusing to let you die means any sense of risk assessment or survival instinct gets shot. The dangers of mixing alcohol and heroin mean nothing to them. -

Hypersexual. Hates sex. The work around is to ensure your partners are either dead or currently dying. Or undead. That one doesn't change after the brain damage but Vel starts self-medicating for it with medicine and magic instead.

A fun game to play with Durge character design is 'How different a person is your pre-amnesia and post-amnesia Durge? What's the same, what's changed?'

My idiot used to be extremely skilled at building, living and juggling multiple fake identities and loved the escape of it all; was a Swiss army knife as good at politics, impersonation and espionage as they were precision violence; had some training in academics that stuck (religious lore, history, local politics and law); did not ascribe to a name or gender identity outside of disguise, it is only The Urge; and survived on alcohol. Also had more ego than AA and under the veneer of high-functioning calm/drugs and disassociation is a raging psychological breakdown waiting to happen and was not living in the same reality everyone else was. Had cleric levels. Forced to dress in expensive clothes half the time as 'befits their station' (thanks Sceleritas). Would eat the rich, quite literally. Favourite colours are black and purple, obviously, why would you question this? (It's blue).

Post-amnesia struggles to emote (can't do it on autopilot); can't drink alcohol on account of seizure risks and the risks of worsening other symptoms (no longer addicted after being forced to go cold turkey and dying of DTs and being resurrected on Kressa's table). Swapped alcohol in for enchantment magics, confectioneries and less self-destructive medicinal herbal teas. And caffeine, which is also potentially dangerous to health but hasn't done anything, yet; has dropped the skillset down to only violence and effective promises of violence to be acted upon if intimidation is not heeded, more of a blunt instrument now; kept the religious lore and wilderness survival knowledge but is otherwise as academically gifted as a bag of rocks and doesn't care; will now tolerate being referred to with a name (sort of) and pronouns; Has more ranger levels that he used to; Has hobbies and a broader personality rather than considering self a vessel to be filled with whatever Bhaal tells them to be; less emotionally unstable due to most of the trauma being cut out or faded; wears the equivalent of ratty jeans and t-shirt most days. Despite the scarring and the TBI, is probably physically healthier than ever due to diet and actually eating things + fresh air and socialisation. Less of a personal chip on their shoulder about class divides, now simply finds the rich and highborn obnoxious. Favourite colour is green.

Still enjoys music and poetry and medical science and has lethal levels of hubris going on. Concerning reactions to violence and death haven't gone anywhere. Would still steal Gortash's coffee.

[y-rhywbeth2]

While modded, there is an exchange in BG2 where you can enter a room with a shadow dragon in it and Xan will freak out, cover your eyes and try and march you away from it - because we don't trust Bhaalspawn to make sensible non-impulsive life decisions around things that are insanely powerful and hard, thus fun, to kill.

I like to imagine that happening in BG3 with Durge, too. Especially in respects to my continual disappointment at seeing dragons and not interacting with them until we get to the Netherbrain fight and FINALLY. Three acts without a dragon fight! I've normally fought at least two by now!

[y-rhywbeth2]

A fun game to play with Durge character design is 'How different a person is your pre-amnesia and post-amnesia Durge? What's the same, what's changed?'

My idiot used to be extremely skilled at building, living and juggling multiple fake identities and loved the escape of it all; was a Swiss army knife as good at politics, impersonation and espionage as they were precision violence; had some training in academics that stuck (religious lore, history, local politics and law); did not ascribe to a name or gender identity outside of disguise, it is only The Urge; and survived on alcohol. Also had more ego than AA and under the veneer of high-functioning calm/drugs and disassociation is a raging psychological breakdown waiting to happen and was not living in the same reality everyone else was. Had cleric levels. Forced to dress in expensive clothes half the time as 'befits their station' (thanks Sceleritas). Would eat the rich, quite literally. Favourite colours are black and purple, obviously, why would you question this? (It's blue).

Post-amnesia struggles to emote (can't do it on autopilot); can't drink alcohol on account of seizure risks and the risks of worsening other symptoms (no longer addicted after being forced to go cold turkey and dying of DTs and being resurrected on Kressa's table). Swapped alcohol in for enchantment magics, confectioneries and less self-destructive medicinal herbal teas. And caffeine, which is also potentially dangerous to health but hasn't done anything, yet; has dropped the skillset down to only violence and effective promises of violence to be acted upon if intimidation is not heeded, more of a blunt instrument now; kept the religious lore and wilderness survival knowledge but is otherwise as academically gifted as a bag of rocks and doesn't care; will now tolerate being referred to with a name (sort of) and pronouns; Has more ranger levels that he used to; Has hobbies and a broader personality rather than considering self a vessel to be filled with whatever Bhaal tells them to be; less emotionally unstable due to most of the trauma being cut out or faded; wears the equivalent of ratty jeans and t-shirt most days. Despite the scarring and the TBI, is probably physically healthier than ever due to diet and actually eating things + fresh air and socialisation. Less of a personal chip on their shoulder about class divides, now simply finds the rich and highborn obnoxious. Favourite colour is green.

Still enjoys music and poetry and medical science and has lethal levels of hubris going on. Concerning reactions to violence and death haven't gone anywhere. Would still steal Gortash's coffee.

[y-rhywbeth2]

Reading a priest novel with a slight focus on temple politics really, really digs up the yearning to do it with Durge.

Where's my nagging treasurer; and bickering subordinates with ulterior motives; and heresies; and conspiracy theorist elder clergy; and subordinates who privately believe me to be an abomination; and donation campaign planning; and the stress of manipulating and outmanoeuvring the nobles, the merchants, the guilds and allied and enemy faiths??

[y-rhywbeth2]

Familiar/animal companion suggestion: a chicken. Whatever fancy aesthetics any other animal might offer, a chicken is a steady supply of eggs so you don't have to worry about breakfast on the go and valuable while adventuring.

It's also not invaluable in combat, if you've ever witnessed a chicken with a vendetta...