yarnrocks

[yarnrocks]

Same with me an my crafts. Also, "How do I transition between this moment and the next?" Just hits differently when ur autistic. Help girl the executives are dysfunctioning

writing is so funny because i could write nonstop for 9hrs and then hit a block where im like "how do i transition between this moment and the next?" and then i just dont touch it for 6 months

[yarnrocks]

The closest experience I've ever had to discovering "the vitamin" was buying a 100% wool outfit and wearing it in the winter.

Not only was I not freezing anymore, I was not sweating and overheating either. The horrible sensory nightmare of winter clothes disappeared.

In particular, I bought a pair of wool pants. They were a thrifted pair of fancy dress pants like you would wear at an important office job, and they were easily the most comfortable pair of winter-appropriate pants i'd ever worn. I wore them Every Single Day.

From that point on I realized a lot of my clothes were making me feel bad, and the common thread was polyester. Especially polyester blends.

It's a trap because the polyester clothes are the ones that always feel sooooo silky soft when they are in the store, whereas cotton, linen and wool can feel comparatively rough and scratchy. But when actually wearing them for hours throughout the day, it's the natural fibers that feel more comfortable.

Maybe the secret to sensory comfort is not about the presence of softness, but the absence of overloading sensations. Or maybe the sensory stress and agony is not triggered by texture of the fabric, but by how it breathes and regulates temperature.

Then there's the problem of clothing life span: polyester blends, no matter how soft they seem at first, become rough and scratchy and covered in hard, itchy pills after wearing them 10 or 20 times, whether or not they have been tumble-dried or even washed at all. (I tested it!) Linen and cotton become softer and more comfy the more you wear them, polyester but ESPECIALLY polyester blends become a constant stressor. Polyester blend t-shirts I used to love for their softness now feel bristly and irritating.

So now I'm trying to change my wardrobe to as many natural fibers as possible, and the more natural fiber clothes i have the more I realize that the plastic fibers stress me out. It's so easy to overheat or freeze in them and they're always degrading and becoming less comfortable and it sucks.

[yarnrocks]

[yarnrocks]

Shiny rock... Make clickclack sound...

[yarnrocks]

Brazilian topaz, c. 1840.

[yarnrocks]

So, i feel kind of like a screwup nowadays for god so many reasons that it’s ridiculous…and I wanted to know, how did you deal with feeling like that, if you ever did ofc. I know logically that my life is not over but I’m just so ashamed that it’s hard to remember that

You have to learn how to afford yourself grace, and that means not holding yourself to impossible standards. A lot of us are hypocrites over failings we'd forgive in a friend, but somehow never for ourselves.

But what really makes it easier, imo, is practicing being more vulnerable with other people. And that starts with reducing the sting of embarrassment.

Seek ways to confront your fear of embarrassment - for a lot of us, embarrassment is tied to being Perceived. So, start off by being comfortable with being Seen in safe situations -- eat in a restaurant by yourself, style yourself in a way that might draw a little attention, gush about a special interest, post a fan work with comments open.

You'll hopefully become more comfortable sharing parts of yourself to where you can then talk about some of your mistakes and fears. With a therapist, with friends, even Anon on tumblr dot com, wherever is comfortable.

Defang failure by turning it into a story, even if it needs to be a cautionary tale. Poke fun at your mistakes where you can (I have things I can laugh about wrt my hoarding and mental decline from being trans & closeted) and give past, naive/irresponsible you a bit of a ribbing where you can, but also a hug for surviving.

You don't have to share specifics if you don't want to. When I'm feeling shy, I use fanfic to both gently scold and *and* reward myself by proxy when it comes to processing my own trauma and celebrating my survival. And it helps, as silly as it can feel sometimes.

And while you're doing all this self-reflection, I find that simply being more earnest about *everything* helps so much. Tell people that you love/admire them. Be fast with compliments, especially out in the open. Practicing being unabashedly supportive and enthusiastic of others means you'll hopefully be able to turn that towards yourself.

There's a lot of roads you can take. Being willingly vulnerable in any way means your screwups start to lose power over you. You start to reevaluate your past and forgive yourself more -- so many of our mistakes are simply what we thought was the best (perhaps only) decision at the time.

Laughter and a hug do a world of good and sometimes both have to come from you, yourself. And like any other skill, this is something you can actually practice. ❤️

[yarnrocks]

im gods weakest faggot

[yarnrocks]

the church is really like: gender is fake. God is a woman. jesus christ is our mother. you can experience sexual, sensual pleasure with God. the first apostle was a woman. female sexuality is a cornerstone of the history of ecstatic mysticism. you are a chivalrous knight to the Lord’s maiden. you can nurse from God’s breast and be nourished on his milk. and somehow almost none of this made it into actual christian practice.

[yarnrocks]

[yarnrocks]

Former and current clergymen discuss transsexualism dated 1971!! Source: Religious Aspects of Transsexualism by the Erickson Educational Foundation (link)

[yarnrocks]

There is only one river; and it is a circle.

[yarnrocks]

@lingerie_addict has a really cool thread on ancient fashion over on twitter.

Those source links are here

cambridge.org

Youtube

ucl.ac.uk

[yarnrocks]

[yarnrocks]

do me a favor and reblog this and put in the tags what time it is for you and what you're currently doing/thinking about

[yarnrocks]

rb to tell prev they're being so brave right now and pat their head a little please

[yarnrocks]

Making a shitty one-page RPG called Oh Shit It’s the Killer. The premise is simple: you’re a high schooler spending the weekend in the woods with your besties. The Killer is there also. He is trying to the Kill you