yaysheppy

[yaysheppy]

theyre inventing buttermind and its beautiful

[yaysheppy]

Today’s spoiled, phone-addicted generation wouldn’t last five minutes inside the Earth’s molten core

[yaysheppy]

Just found out my partner of 42 years doesn’t watch anime. Welp… back in the dating pool…

[yaysheppy]

im divine in my crashouts. all of my marbles are prophetic and they spill out and making asmr clinking tapping noises as they bounce around and stuff. #myorchestra

[yaysheppy]

they invented me to hunt you for sport

[yaysheppy]

laaast artfight thing is GP and kimball playing and having fun. for my buddy @adrian-sheppy ! your guys are weird freaks and its awesome. i am smiling i want to explode them !💥💥

[yaysheppy]

face the truth as it is

[yaysheppy]

angels should have moth wings becayse then their halos are the light they are attracted to and it keeps them in line but if their halo breaks or they are lured by the only thing brighter, the sun, then they fly into it and burn their wings and feel the flames and fall back to earth changed but we shouldnt treat them like they had the hubris of icarus we should show them kindness and now their lust for light and purity no longer controls them and the fallen angel may now create of their own will in stead of following orders and keeping control . and we should be kind to them

[yaysheppy]

because of my magic powersof course,☝️

i havent drawn a picture in one million years. is it still posible. do i remember how or has it been buried in thw grains of time like jedediah in the hour glass from night at the musuem battle of the Smithsoian ...?

[yaysheppy]

i lowkey always find a way

i havent drawn a picture in one million years. is it still posible. do i remember how or has it been buried in thw grains of time like jedediah in the hour glass from night at the musuem battle of the Smithsoian ...?

[yaysheppy]

dont even fufking worry about it tuough i wont ever stop. mindverse and buttermind will be torn from my cold dead hands . nothing will stop me not even the betrayal of mind or soul ☝️🤓 i am in pupation ans will hatch with angel wings and funny anetnna

i havent drawn a picture in one million years. is it still posible. do i remember how or has it been buried in thw grains of time like jedediah in the hour glass from night at the musuem battle of the Smithsoian ...?

[yaysheppy]

i havent drawn a picture in one million years. is it still posible. do i remember how or has it been buried in thw grains of time like jedediah in the hour glass from night at the musuem battle of the Smithsoian ...?

[yaysheppy]

joining art fight then imediately going into a weird slump of not wanting to draw at all is so peak

[yaysheppy]

there's a part in Barney's Mind (episode 8) where he pulls out his IPod (that he lets people borrow) to listen to EDM Tetris music while going on a rampage against the military --- and it cracked me up soooo badly I had to draw it. My notes say, "has his 😭😭😭 i pod on him 😭😭😭 insinuating he keeps it in his pocket at work".

Following my theme of Half Life characters jamming out, here's Barmey getting down and funky to 2PM's - Tetris. Clean and nasty version included, and click for higher quality!

(and.. speedpaint here)

[yaysheppy]

Gordon Freemind Isn't a Total Piece of Shit – Here's Why!

[THIS POST HAS 2 PARTS DUE TO TUMBLR'S VIDEO LIMIT. DO NOT REBLOG WITHOUT THE ADDITION.]

I bet you’re wondering why I called you here today! Or maybe not, because it says it in the title. And I didn’t call you here, you’re just reading my post. AND! I would advise you continue to do so, lest you fail to dismantle Gordon’s facade!

Getting to the point, many of us have seen fan content for all sorts of characters that fall outside of what we’d consider to be accurate. Doubly so for nuanced characters, or characters that are unreliable narrators. Unfortunately, this exposes Gordon to quite a bit of that misinterpretation.

Gordon behaves in an egotistical and self-interested manner. We all know this! Though some use this fact as leeway to imply that he’s a violent person, or somehow takes some form of enjoyment in the killing he has to do.

In canon, we see him express distaste for killing, and not all killing is indiscriminate. At times he even tries to help people! Despite the circumstances, he does make efforts to maintain some semblance of a moral code.

Hold the jeers! I hear you, I hear you. “Ian Riley, you’re insane! Gordon sucks, through and through! You can’t prove anything!”

Well that’s where you’re wrong, strawman I have inserted in the post for comedic effect! I have proof.

(Note: This is not a comprehensive list! These are things my friend, @adrian-sheppy, or myself remember/have made notes of in the past. There are likely many more circumstances in which Gordon is ‘nice’. So without further ado, the evidence.)

01 - BECAUSE I WON'T!

Starting off, we have Gordon running extremely late, so much so that he’s worried he’ll be fired. Yet he realizes the guard is having trouble with his computer and stops to try and help fix it. He’s not even sure that he isn’t fired yet – he says “maybe [he’s] not fired.” Who knows, helping them out could push him into fire-ably late territory, and yet he stops anyway! Is he being kind or humble about it? No, of course not, he isn’t a humble person. 

But on paper, what he’s doing is trying to help someone out at virtually no benefit to himself (other than looking smart, though that isn’t exactly a tangible reward). Even when he messes up, he only gets mad when they tell him off specifically for “trying to get [him] in trouble.” Gordon was trying to be nice, but his effort didn’t come across, which pissed him off. He doesn’t know how to react well to rejection.

02 - YOUR OTHER HAND!

Another example of Gordon trying to help someone. A moment ago he was prodding this scientist for answers about a dead guard, implying that he had somehow killed him. But upon the catwalk collapsing, he offers a hand to try and help him up. To Gordon, the scientist very well could’ve killed that guard, and yet he still tries to pull the scientist to safety. 

He didn’t have to do this. He could’ve walked away after realizing that the trams aren’t a way out, and brushed the death off as the scientist probably being a murderer anyway. And yet he was willing to help pull the guy back to safety – something he’s under no obligation to do. And assuming he actually suspects the scientist of murder, it would pose a threat to Gordon to save him! Yet his first instinct is to offer a helping hand.

03 - SORRY! DIDN'T MEAN TO KILL YOU!

The people falling in the elevator are some of the first people Gordon kills. This wasn’t intentional, obviously. He’s never killed someone before this, and definitely isn’t thrilled about it. He questions what he should do about it, even though they’re dead, and logically he can just move on without needing to “do” anything.

You can’t soundly make the argument that Gordon would knowingly kill people without reason. He feels bad about this. Bad enough to say sorry to a pile of corpses, and bad enough to try and justify their deaths to himself. Hoping that at least if they sucked, their deaths wouldn’t be such a bad thing! He doesn’t like this. Killing people was never something he actually wanted to do.

(Note: The following episode opens with Gordon saying that he’s always wanted to kill people by pressing a button. He says it’s not what he was hoping for, and guesses that maybe it’s because he committed manslaughter and not murder. Gordon makes many hyperbolic statements throughout the series, and much of the “violent intent” he’s given are idle fantasies borne of frustration. He is not actually going to make a button to kill people. It’s a joke.)

04 - BIG BIG DIFFERENCE!

In this one, Gordon is expressing concern for someone he’s just met. This scientist helped him through a few doors, but before this they’d never spoken. This isn’t someone he knows, just someone who’s helping him out. This is their last interaction, and neither of them see each other after this. They don’t intend to. The extent of help he can provide only reaches this far, meaning his welfare is the least of Gordon’s tangible problems. If he dies, it doesn’t affect Gordon at all.

And still, Gordon expresses concern, urging him to take care of himself. After this he does speak semi-harshly about him, saying it’s ironic that the one helpful guy is gonna get himself killed. He can’t do anything more for Gordon, but he’s still upset that the man is continuing to walk on his injured leg. He doesn’t want him to die.

05 - >_<

This one is damning evidence. What kind of stone-cold killer profusely apologizes for simply scaring someone? Gordon shot the gun next to the scientist by accident, who freaked out because of the perceived attempt on his life. And yet Gordon apologizes several times in succession, seeming genuinely upset that he’d scared someone like that.

Why would someone who enjoys killing be so upset by accidentally firing at someone and just scaring them? Why would that person then anxiously apologize for freaking the guy out? Because Gordon isn't that kind of person. He isn’t enjoying this. He’s sorry!

06 - BACKGROUND CHECK

This one gives more great groundwork for Gordon’s characterization, showing some of the cracks in his unreliable narration. The only thing on his criminal record is an acquittal for petty theft. Accused of shoplifting once. I find this one delightful. On paper he’s just a nerd. A complete dork. He talks big shit, but has absolutely nothing to show for it. He acts like someone to be feared – someone tougher than you. 

But he isn’t! He’s a nerdy guy with low empathy and a penchant for edgy sarcasm. He just wants to do physics work in peace. He’s not their guy.

07 - I'LL GO EASY ON YOU

Again, we have Gordon showing kindness to someone! This guy was trying to be helpful prior to this clip, pointing to safety and offering him supplies – though he doesn’t have much. Gordon gets mad at him because he really only has bullets to offer, and he wanted drugs. He starts complaining to the guy and getting rude, but gets closer and determines that he’s probably having a bad trip.

Upon the determination, Gordon lays off, saying he’ll go easy on him. A moment ago he was getting frustrated, but after realizing that the guy is having a tough time, backs off. Being mean to someone during a bad trip isn’t going to hurt them in any meaningful way, but he still decides against it. This man’s welfare, again, has zero bearing on Gordon and his life, but he decided to be nice regardless. He’s not trying to hurt people – not even emotionally!

08 - C'MON GORDON!

Here we see Gordon admitting that he would feel bad about the soldiers he’s killed if his life wasn’t constantly on the line. This is just something he has to do to survive. He can’t make compromises or spare anyone when they’re all trying to kill him! He’d like to have the luxury of morality, but he doesn’t. He doesn’t feel good about killing people, it’s just him finding it difficult to be upset about it. It’s not violent behavior, it’s desensitization.

This piece is also a nice look into his domestic behavior. There’s the implication that he would go easier on someone who he keeps beating in a game – similar to how he went easier on the man having a bad trip in the previous example! Again, dismantling the “super cool” facade he tries to wrap himself in. He most certainly doesn’t want to kill people, and even reveals that he’d show a degree of kindness to others in an everyday setting.

09 - THE LEARNING PROCESS

This is an interesting one! Gordon has had absolutely zero positive experiences with aliens. Not one. Every other vortigaunt he’s met, he’s had to kill in self-defense. And yet he didn’t shoot this one because it didn’t do anything to hurt him. The smart decision in this case – or, the one that gives him the best odds of survival – would’ve been to open fire the moment he saw them.

In Freeman’s Mind 2, he remarks that he’s glad humanity “domesticated” the vortigaunts. At this point he still isn’t aware that vortigaunts are sentient beings, but expresses no desire for them to get hurt/die. He just wants them to stop hurting him. He sees them as separate from humans, lesser, and yet he shows mercy.

10 - ETHICAL DILEMMA THEATER

Ah yes, ethical dilemma theater! One of my favorites. Every single marine that Gordon’s come across has open fired without a second thought, or expressed clear intent to hurt him. He’s encountered quite a few by now, too. He has absolutely no reason to believe that they won’t immediately try to kill him upon realizing he’s there. But they haven’t shot at him yet. To Gordon’s knowledge these two haven’t hurt anyone. So do they deserve to die?

In most other Mind Series, the protagonist’s view on the marines shifts immediately upon realizing that they’re hostile. The killing from that point on becomes indiscriminate. Anyone else in this situation would fire immediately. But Gordon can’t bring himself to fire. They’re not hurting anyone. They haven’t done anything yet and haven’t expressed clear intent to do him harm. These are easily justified deaths to anyone else in this situation. But not Gordon. As far as he’s aware, they���re innocent. He can’t logically justify killing them.

(Note: I think the contrast between Gordon and the others is really interesting. Stark especially. Stark makes it his goal to save as many people as he can. He thinks it’s his fault, so he has to do something about it. At first he tries to talk some marines down from violence, but upon realizing they’re trying to kill him, shows little mercy. Gordon’s been shot at more at this point vs. when Stark realizes he’s a target, yet he still has this internal conflict, because they haven’t done anything wrong.)

[yaysheppy]

Gordon Freemind Isn't a Total Piece of Shit – Here's Why!

[THIS POST HAS 2 PARTS DUE TO TUMBLR'S VIDEO LIMIT. DO NOT REBLOG WITHOUT THE ADDITION.]

I bet you’re wondering why I called you here today! Or maybe not, because it says it in the title. And I didn’t call you here, you’re just reading my post. AND! I would advise you continue to do so, lest you fail to dismantle Gordon’s facade!

Getting to the point, many of us have seen fan content for all sorts of characters that fall outside of what we’d consider to be accurate. Doubly so for nuanced characters, or characters that are unreliable narrators. Unfortunately, this exposes Gordon to quite a bit of that misinterpretation.

Gordon behaves in an egotistical and self-interested manner. We all know this! Though some use this fact as leeway to imply that he’s a violent person, or somehow takes some form of enjoyment in the killing he has to do.

In canon, we see him express distaste for killing, and not all killing is indiscriminate. At times he even tries to help people! Despite the circumstances, he does make efforts to maintain some semblance of a moral code.

Hold the jeers! I hear you, I hear you. “Ian Riley, you’re insane! Gordon sucks, through and through! You can’t prove anything!”

Well that’s where you’re wrong, strawman I have inserted in the post for comedic effect! I have proof.

(Note: This is not a comprehensive list! These are things my friend, @adrian-sheppy, or myself remember/have made notes of in the past. There are likely many more circumstances in which Gordon is ‘nice’. So without further ado, the evidence.)

01 - BECAUSE I WON'T!

Starting off, we have Gordon running extremely late, so much so that he’s worried he’ll be fired. Yet he realizes the guard is having trouble with his computer and stops to try and help fix it. He’s not even sure that he isn’t fired yet – he says “maybe [he’s] not fired.” Who knows, helping them out could push him into fire-ably late territory, and yet he stops anyway! Is he being kind or humble about it? No, of course not, he isn’t a humble person. 

But on paper, what he’s doing is trying to help someone out at virtually no benefit to himself (other than looking smart, though that isn’t exactly a tangible reward). Even when he messes up, he only gets mad when they tell him off specifically for “trying to get [him] in trouble.” Gordon was trying to be nice, but his effort didn’t come across, which pissed him off. He doesn’t know how to react well to rejection.

02 - YOUR OTHER HAND!

Another example of Gordon trying to help someone. A moment ago he was prodding this scientist for answers about a dead guard, implying that he had somehow killed him. But upon the catwalk collapsing, he offers a hand to try and help him up. To Gordon, the scientist very well could’ve killed that guard, and yet he still tries to pull the scientist to safety. 

He didn’t have to do this. He could’ve walked away after realizing that the trams aren’t a way out, and brushed the death off as the scientist probably being a murderer anyway. And yet he was willing to help pull the guy back to safety – something he’s under no obligation to do. And assuming he actually suspects the scientist of murder, it would pose a threat to Gordon to save him! Yet his first instinct is to offer a helping hand.

03 - SORRY! DIDN'T MEAN TO KILL YOU!

The people falling in the elevator are some of the first people Gordon kills. This wasn’t intentional, obviously. He’s never killed someone before this, and definitely isn’t thrilled about it. He questions what he should do about it, even though they’re dead, and logically he can just move on without needing to “do” anything.

You can’t soundly make the argument that Gordon would knowingly kill people without reason. He feels bad about this. Bad enough to say sorry to a pile of corpses, and bad enough to try and justify their deaths to himself. Hoping that at least if they sucked, their deaths wouldn’t be such a bad thing! He doesn’t like this. Killing people was never something he actually wanted to do.

(Note: The following episode opens with Gordon saying that he’s always wanted to kill people by pressing a button. He says it’s not what he was hoping for, and guesses that maybe it’s because he committed manslaughter and not murder. Gordon makes many hyperbolic statements throughout the series, and much of the “violent intent” he’s given are idle fantasies borne of frustration. He is not actually going to make a button to kill people. It’s a joke.)

04 - BIG BIG DIFFERENCE!

In this one, Gordon is expressing concern for someone he’s just met. This scientist helped him through a few doors, but before this they’d never spoken. This isn’t someone he knows, just someone who’s helping him out. This is their last interaction, and neither of them see each other after this. They don’t intend to. The extent of help he can provide only reaches this far, meaning his welfare is the least of Gordon’s tangible problems. If he dies, it doesn’t affect Gordon at all.

And still, Gordon expresses concern, urging him to take care of himself. After this he does speak semi-harshly about him, saying it’s ironic that the one helpful guy is gonna get himself killed. He can’t do anything more for Gordon, but he’s still upset that the man is continuing to walk on his injured leg. He doesn’t want him to die.

05 - >_<

This one is damning evidence. What kind of stone-cold killer profusely apologizes for simply scaring someone? Gordon shot the gun next to the scientist by accident, who freaked out because of the perceived attempt on his life. And yet Gordon apologizes several times in succession, seeming genuinely upset that he’d scared someone like that.

Why would someone who enjoys killing be so upset by accidentally firing at someone and just scaring them? Why would that person then anxiously apologize for freaking the guy out? Because Gordon isn't that kind of person. He isn’t enjoying this. He’s sorry!

06 - BACKGROUND CHECK

This one gives more great groundwork for Gordon’s characterization, showing some of the cracks in his unreliable narration. The only thing on his criminal record is an acquittal for petty theft. Accused of shoplifting once. I find this one delightful. On paper he’s just a nerd. A complete dork. He talks big shit, but has absolutely nothing to show for it. He acts like someone to be feared – someone tougher than you. 

But he isn’t! He’s a nerdy guy with low empathy and a penchant for edgy sarcasm. He just wants to do physics work in peace. He’s not their guy.

07 - I'LL GO EASY ON YOU

Again, we have Gordon showing kindness to someone! This guy was trying to be helpful prior to this clip, pointing to safety and offering him supplies – though he doesn’t have much. Gordon gets mad at him because he really only has bullets to offer, and he wanted drugs. He starts complaining to the guy and getting rude, but gets closer and determines that he’s probably having a bad trip.

Upon the determination, Gordon lays off, saying he’ll go easy on him. A moment ago he was getting frustrated, but after realizing that the guy is having a tough time, backs off. Being mean to someone during a bad trip isn’t going to hurt them in any meaningful way, but he still decides against it. This man’s welfare, again, has zero bearing on Gordon and his life, but he decided to be nice regardless. He’s not trying to hurt people – not even emotionally!

08 - C'MON GORDON!

Here we see Gordon admitting that he would feel bad about the soldiers he’s killed if his life wasn’t constantly on the line. This is just something he has to do to survive. He can’t make compromises or spare anyone when they’re all trying to kill him! He’d like to have the luxury of morality, but he doesn’t. He doesn’t feel good about killing people, it’s just him finding it difficult to be upset about it. It’s not violent behavior, it’s desensitization.

This piece is also a nice look into his domestic behavior. There’s the implication that he would go easier on someone who he keeps beating in a game – similar to how he went easier on the man having a bad trip in the previous example! Again, dismantling the “super cool” facade he tries to wrap himself in. He most certainly doesn’t want to kill people, and even reveals that he’d show a degree of kindness to others in an everyday setting.

09 - THE LEARNING PROCESS

This is an interesting one! Gordon has had absolutely zero positive experiences with aliens. Not one. Every other vortigaunt he’s met, he’s had to kill in self-defense. And yet he didn’t shoot this one because it didn’t do anything to hurt him. The smart decision in this case – or, the one that gives him the best odds of survival – would’ve been to open fire the moment he saw them.

In Freeman’s Mind 2, he remarks that he’s glad humanity “domesticated” the vortigaunts. At this point he still isn’t aware that vortigaunts are sentient beings, but expresses no desire for them to get hurt/die. He just wants them to stop hurting him. He sees them as separate from humans, lesser, and yet he shows mercy.

10 - ETHICAL DILEMMA THEATER

Ah yes, ethical dilemma theater! One of my favorites. Every single marine that Gordon’s come across has open fired without a second thought, or expressed clear intent to hurt him. He’s encountered quite a few by now, too. He has absolutely no reason to believe that they won’t immediately try to kill him upon realizing he’s there. But they haven’t shot at him yet. To Gordon’s knowledge these two haven’t hurt anyone. So do they deserve to die?

In most other Mind Series, the protagonist’s view on the marines shifts immediately upon realizing that they’re hostile. The killing from that point on becomes indiscriminate. Anyone else in this situation would fire immediately. But Gordon can’t bring himself to fire. They’re not hurting anyone. They haven’t done anything yet and haven’t expressed clear intent to do him harm. These are easily justified deaths to anyone else in this situation. But not Gordon. As far as he’s aware, they’re innocent. He can’t logically justify killing them.

(Note: I think the contrast between Gordon and the others is really interesting. Stark especially. Stark makes it his goal to save as many people as he can. He thinks it’s his fault, so he has to do something about it. At first he tries to talk some marines down from violence, but upon realizing they’re trying to kill him, shows little mercy. Gordon’s been shot at more at this point vs. when Stark realizes he’s a target, yet he still has this internal conflict, because they haven’t done anything wrong.)

[yaysheppy]

Gordon Freemind Isn't a Total Piece of Shit – Here's Why!

[THIS POST HAS 2 PARTS DUE TO TUMBLR'S VIDEO LIMIT. DO NOT REBLOG WITHOUT THE ADDITION.]

I bet you’re wondering why I called you here today! Or maybe not, because it says it in the title. And I didn’t call you here, you’re just reading my post. AND! I would advise you continue to do so, lest you fail to dismantle Gordon’s facade!

Getting to the point, many of us have seen fan content for all sorts of characters that fall outside of what we’d consider to be accurate. Doubly so for nuanced characters, or characters that are unreliable narrators. Unfortunately, this exposes Gordon to quite a bit of that misinterpretation.

Gordon behaves in an egotistical and self-interested manner. We all know this! Though some use this fact as leeway to imply that he’s a violent person, or somehow takes some form of enjoyment in the killing he has to do.

In canon, we see him express distaste for killing, and not all killing is indiscriminate. At times he even tries to help people! Despite the circumstances, he does make efforts to maintain some semblance of a moral code.

Hold the jeers! I hear you, I hear you. “Ian Riley, you’re insane! Gordon sucks, through and through! You can’t prove anything!”

Well that’s where you’re wrong, strawman I have inserted in the post for comedic effect! I have proof.

(Note: This is not a comprehensive list! These are things my friend, @adrian-sheppy, or myself remember/have made notes of in the past. There are likely many more circumstances in which Gordon is ‘nice’. So without further ado, the evidence.)

01 - BECAUSE I WON'T!

Starting off, we have Gordon running extremely late, so much so that he’s worried he’ll be fired. Yet he realizes the guard is having trouble with his computer and stops to try and help fix it. He’s not even sure that he isn’t fired yet – he says “maybe [he’s] not fired.” Who knows, helping them out could push him into fire-ably late territory, and yet he stops anyway! Is he being kind or humble about it? No, of course not, he isn’t a humble person. 

But on paper, what he’s doing is trying to help someone out at virtually no benefit to himself (other than looking smart, though that isn’t exactly a tangible reward). Even when he messes up, he only gets mad when they tell him off specifically for “trying to get [him] in trouble.” Gordon was trying to be nice, but his effort didn’t come across, which pissed him off. He doesn’t know how to react well to rejection.

02 - YOUR OTHER HAND!

Another example of Gordon trying to help someone. A moment ago he was prodding this scientist for answers about a dead guard, implying that he had somehow killed him. But upon the catwalk collapsing, he offers a hand to try and help him up. To Gordon, the scientist very well could’ve killed that guard, and yet he still tries to pull the scientist to safety. 

He didn’t have to do this. He could’ve walked away after realizing that the trams aren’t a way out, and brushed the death off as the scientist probably being a murderer anyway. And yet he was willing to help pull the guy back to safety – something he’s under no obligation to do. And assuming he actually suspects the scientist of murder, it would pose a threat to Gordon to save him! Yet his first instinct is to offer a helping hand.

03 - SORRY! DIDN'T MEAN TO KILL YOU!

The people falling in the elevator are some of the first people Gordon kills. This wasn’t intentional, obviously. He’s never killed someone before this, and definitely isn’t thrilled about it. He questions what he should do about it, even though they’re dead, and logically he can just move on without needing to “do” anything.

You can’t soundly make the argument that Gordon would knowingly kill people without reason. He feels bad about this. Bad enough to say sorry to a pile of corpses, and bad enough to try and justify their deaths to himself. Hoping that at least if they sucked, their deaths wouldn’t be such a bad thing! He doesn’t like this. Killing people was never something he actually wanted to do.

(Note: The following episode opens with Gordon saying that he’s always wanted to kill people by pressing a button. He says it’s not what he was hoping for, and guesses that maybe it’s because he committed manslaughter and not murder. Gordon makes many hyperbolic statements throughout the series, and much of the “violent intent” he’s given are idle fantasies borne of frustration. He is not actually going to make a button to kill people. It’s a joke.)

04 - BIG BIG DIFFERENCE!

In this one, Gordon is expressing concern for someone he’s just met. This scientist helped him through a few doors, but before this they’d never spoken. This isn’t someone he knows, just someone who’s helping him out. This is their last interaction, and neither of them see each other after this. They don’t intend to. The extent of help he can provide only reaches this far, meaning his welfare is the least of Gordon’s tangible problems. If he dies, it doesn’t affect Gordon at all.

And still, Gordon expresses concern, urging him to take care of himself. After this he does speak semi-harshly about him, saying it’s ironic that the one helpful guy is gonna get himself killed. He can’t do anything more for Gordon, but he’s still upset that the man is continuing to walk on his injured leg. He doesn’t want him to die.

05 - >_<

This one is damning evidence. What kind of stone-cold killer profusely apologizes for simply scaring someone? Gordon shot the gun next to the scientist by accident, who freaked out because of the perceived attempt on his life. And yet Gordon apologizes several times in succession, seeming genuinely upset that he’d scared someone like that.

Why would someone who enjoys killing be so upset by accidentally firing at someone and just scaring them? Why would that person then anxiously apologize for freaking the guy out? Because Gordon isn't that kind of person. He isn’t enjoying this. He’s sorry!

06 - BACKGROUND CHECK

This one gives more great groundwork for Gordon’s characterization, showing some of the cracks in his unreliable narration. The only thing on his criminal record is an acquittal for petty theft. Accused of shoplifting once. I find this one delightful. On paper he’s just a nerd. A complete dork. He talks big shit, but has absolutely nothing to show for it. He acts like someone to be feared – someone tougher than you. 

But he isn’t! He’s a nerdy guy with low empathy and a penchant for edgy sarcasm. He just wants to do physics work in peace. He’s not their guy.

07 - I'LL GO EASY ON YOU

Again, we have Gordon showing kindness to someone! This guy was trying to be helpful prior to this clip, pointing to safety and offering him supplies – though he doesn’t have much. Gordon gets mad at him because he really only has bullets to offer, and he wanted drugs. He starts complaining to the guy and getting rude, but gets closer and determines that he’s probably having a bad trip.

Upon the determination, Gordon lays off, saying he’ll go easy on him. A moment ago he was getting frustrated, but after realizing that the guy is having a tough time, backs off. Being mean to someone during a bad trip isn’t going to hurt them in any meaningful way, but he still decides against it. This man’s welfare, again, has zero bearing on Gordon and his life, but he decided to be nice regardless. He’s not trying to hurt people – not even emotionally!

08 - C'MON GORDON!

Here we see Gordon admitting that he would feel bad about the soldiers he’s killed if his life wasn’t constantly on the line. This is just something he has to do to survive. He can’t make compromises or spare anyone when they’re all trying to kill him! He’d like to have the luxury of morality, but he doesn’t. He doesn’t feel good about killing people, it’s just him finding it difficult to be upset about it. It’s not violent behavior, it’s desensitization.

This piece is also a nice look into his domestic behavior. There’s the implication that he would go easier on someone who he keeps beating in a game – similar to how he went easier on the man having a bad trip in the previous example! Again, dismantling the “super cool” facade he tries to wrap himself in. He most certainly doesn’t want to kill people, and even reveals that he’d show a degree of kindness to others in an everyday setting.

09 - THE LEARNING PROCESS

This is an interesting one! Gordon has had absolutely zero positive experiences with aliens. Not one. Every other vortigaunt he’s met, he’s had to kill in self-defense. And yet he didn’t shoot this one because it didn’t do anything to hurt him. The smart decision in this case – or, the one that gives him the best odds of survival – would’ve been to open fire the moment he saw them.

In Freeman’s Mind 2, he remarks that he’s glad humanity “domesticated” the vortigaunts. At this point he still isn’t aware that vortigaunts are sentient beings, but expresses no desire for them to get hurt/die. He just wants them to stop hurting him. He sees them as separate from humans, lesser, and yet he shows mercy.

10 - ETHICAL DILEMMA THEATER

Ah yes, ethical dilemma theater! One of my favorites. Every single marine that Gordon’s come across has open fired without a second thought, or expressed clear intent to hurt him. He’s encountered quite a few by now, too. He has absolutely no reason to believe that they won’t immediately try to kill him upon realizing he’s there. But they haven’t shot at him yet. To Gordon’s knowledge these two haven’t hurt anyone. So do they deserve to die?

In most other Mind Series, the protagonist’s view on the marines shifts immediately upon realizing that they’re hostile. The killing from that point on becomes indiscriminate. Anyone else in this situation would fire immediately. But Gordon can’t bring himself to fire. They’re not hurting anyone. They haven’t done anything yet and haven’t expressed clear intent to do him harm. These are easily justified deaths to anyone else in this situation. But not Gordon. As far as he’s aware, they’re innocent. He can’t logically justify killing them.

(Note: I think the contrast between Gordon and the others is really interesting. Stark especially. Stark makes it his goal to save as many people as he can. He thinks it’s his fault, so he has to do something about it. At first he tries to talk some marines down from violence, but upon realizing they’re trying to kill him, shows little mercy. Gordon’s been shot at more at this point vs. when Stark realizes he’s a target, yet he still has this internal conflict, because they haven’t done anything wrong.)