yikesimonfire

[yikesimonfire]

doc-maverixk​:

Nope. No. Nada. We only consider water to be wet because we are naturally dry. Wetness is only noticed when something is then surrounded by air. Dryness? Water itself isn’t wet.

If we say that “wet” is what happens when liquid is sticking to a dry surface, such as condensation on a glass, then we cannot say that water itself is wet, because it takes a liquid AND a something dry to define something as wet!

[ user takes several hours days? weeks? invested in research for the sake of winning an argument against a stranger on the internet :/ ]

I understand your standpoint but would like to point out the following:

Wet as a word quite literally comes from water. The earliest recorded version of the word, wed- comes from Proto-Indo-European (aka PIE), the hypothetical common ancestor to all Indo-European languages. Wed- in it’s most basic form means water in PIE and is where the basis of the word “wet” comes from.

The quote is from an opinion piece with, sadly, no citations, but evidence for this claim can be found here. 

So, fine — you can chock how we perceive wetness up to a linguistic flaw, because we don’t exactly have a word to describe the sensation of water on a molecular level, do we? After all, we can’t feel dihydrogen monoxide or even perceive it with the naked eye until there are enough of those molecules together.

Linguistics aside, the structure of water is complicated at best. As I previously stated, there needs to be a certain amount of dihydrogen monoxide molecules for it to be observable, and even then, they can be arranged in such a way that they are either a solid, liquid, or gas. Ice, for example, isn’t necessarily “wet” until it reaches a certain temperature to produce moisture; same as when it presents in a gaseous state. But under those conditions is when we have water, which undeniably has the ability to make things wet.

Really, it all boils down to the molecular structure of dihydrogen monoxide in this state and the hydrogen bonds therein. From what I understand, liquid water has a hydrogen bond different from ice or steam, primarily due to differences in temperature affecting this bond. 

According to Richard Saykally, chemist at the University of California, Berkley,  “strong tetrahedral hydrogen bonding” makes water wet. (Source). 

Sorry to say, Doc, but I think it’s safe to say that water is, in fact, wet.

[yikesimonfire]

specterchasing​:

[pm] I can’t believe you would do this to me. My hopes were up and now they’re six feet under. Surely, I will perish too.

[pm] It’s for your own good, though! Maybe if your serotonin stays within a normal range, I’ll be able to indulge you. Until then, I guess I’ll have to make another apology video. :/

[yikesimonfire]

specterchasing​:

[pm] Maybe, but what a way to go!

Well, that depends, how do you plan on showing it?

[pm] I’m afraid to say. Your serotonin levels are high enough as it is. What if this sends you overboard? I couldn’t live with myself knowing I put you in that kind of danger. 😔

[yikesimonfire]

specterchasing​:

[pm] I feel so validated right now. I love when you talk about how obsessed with me you are. I’m experiencing brand-new levels of serotonin.

[pm] Eddie, that’s too much serotonin. You could probably die. What’ll happen when I start showing you how obsessed I am with you?

[yikesimonfire]

specterchasing​:

[pm] I did. I think about how powerful you are all the time.

Do you ever have them playing in the background while you work though? That’s the real question.

[pm] Sometimes when I miss your voice, yeah Not when I work, no. Too distracting. My face would be glued to the video and I wouldn’t get anything done. 

[yikesimonfire]

specterchasing​:

[pm] As it turns out, phoenix tears can even mend a broken heart. 

Oh, is that so? I gotta ask, how often do you watch my videos?

[pm] And via the web! I had no idea how powerful I was. 

Believe it or not, I have notifications turned on for when you upload. I never miss a video. 

[yikesimonfire]

specterchasing​:

[pm] I don’t like how well you phrased all of that, it’s like you’ve done this before. That said, I appreciate the effort and accept your hollow yet impressive apology. We may now flirt without limits.

[pm] I poured my entire heart and soul into that. I even shed a tear! And I may or may not have learned a thing or two about exposition from watching your videos over the years. 

[yikesimonfire]

rainaim​:

[pm] Hmm. You gotta point! Don’t know if it’d classify you all cursed an such, but there’s bound to be some mystery behind that! 

[pm] I’m definitely cur But, see, what I’ve failed to mention is that Mary Poppins cannot be put back in the bag now that I’ve taken it out. I’m stuck watching the endless loop forever. If you don’t hear from me for a few days, please have someone check my apartment. It’ll probably kill me. 

[yikesimonfire]

phoenixleah​:

That’s because those forms I had you fill out were for health insurance, under the guise of a library card.  

You’ve had a library card since birth, you birdbrain!

I have health insurance? Wait... Am I paying for health insurance? I did not sign up for this. This is fraud and theft. I'm gonna need you to comp me for that. If doing so revokes my library card, so be it. 

[yikesimonfire]

specterchasing​:

[pm] Surprisingly no, but anon kinda read my mind. You should still make that video, by the way. Just because I’m flirting with you doesn’t mean I forgive you.

[pm] I was going to ask you to help me figure out what to say in it. Y’know, since you’re the expert YouTuber. But I got the impression you wouldn’t talk to me until I made it. Relieved to know that I was wrong. 

[pm] Gimme a sec.

[user sends a video file minutes later of him pouting at the camera, apologizing for “ever saying that Eddie Carridine has ever eaten gluten” because it was “insensitive to his gluten-intolerance” along with other vague lines from typical YouTube apology videos, without actually saying it was untrue]

[yikesimonfire]

fearfordinner​:

I’d watch it. It’d be fun to see someone else experiencing their own existential recording. 

That’s just The Truman Show in real life. 

[yikesimonfire]

@specterchasing replied to this

[pm] They're right and they should say it.

[pm] It was you, wasn’t it? And here I was, about to sit down and write the script for that apology video I owe ya... 

[yikesimonfire]

@fearfordinner replied to this

Cool.

I have to wonder if it does the same thing to other people, or if it’s just a livestream of the back of my head for everyone else. 

[yikesimonfire]

specterchasing​:

Too late, you broke my heart in half. I don’t know if I’ll ever recover.

Not even if I made a public statement that my original gluten comment was a lie? Better yet, an apology video?

[yikesimonfire]

specterchasing​:

Please say sike. :(

You got me, I didn’t do it. Sike! Unsubbed. <3

[user immediately feels bad and replies again]

You know I’m both physically and emotionally incapable of unsubscribing. 

[yikesimonfire]

specterchasing​:

The seeds of your sins are germinating as we speak. You’re gonna regret this.

Just for that, I’m unsubscribing. :/

[yikesimonfire]

Hot Coder, Kind Shoulder, Spicey Boi, Tweety Bird, Flame On, Forever Young

Anon, reveal yourself so I can block you. <3