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the overwhelming feeling of sadness sometimes when someone treats me with kindness
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feverish and forsaken. on my second glass of mulled wine. never kill yourself

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Dysphoria (2025)
This is a repaint of an illustration I first posted right here on this account over a decade ago when I first transitioned. I did this for TDOV this year as a sort of 'then vs now' for myself more than anything. A lot has changed in a decade. I've changed.
A decade ago visibility felt like liberation, but today it feels like a target. A decade ago politicians made a lot of promises to us, and today they can't run away from us fast enough. A decade ago I was crashing out in a dysphoria spiral. Today, in spite of everything, I'm at peace with myself.
It's Pride Month in the States and the Trans community is going through it. Between the Skrmetti decision and the threat of HR1 stripping care from Trans people of ALL ages on Medicaid and ACA plans, Trans people need support more than ever.
So I'm making this illustration available as a print in my shop and 100% of the proceeds will be donated to Point of Pride, an organization dedicated to providing financial aid for transition care. I'll post receipts of funds donated at the end of the month.
I'm aiming to raise at least $2000, as that's the amount needed to cover 12 months of telehealth services, prescription medications, lab work, and more for at least one trans person in need of HRT.
Transition care really IS life saving, it saved MY life. I wouldn't have lived to make any of the art that people have told me they love so much. My whole portfolio, all my work over the years, none of it would exist. If my art has ever meant anything to you, please, help.
You can donate using the link below:
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Please forgive me for ranting, but...I am so tired of AI. Just so tired. I don't want Microsoft Copilot, or Google Gemini, or Meta AI, or whatever other energy-sucking, water-wasting, mediocrity-spewing LLM is currently being thrust upon me. I just want to be left alone to create in peace.
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I think this is the first time I've made furry ocs that are fully mine and not a design for an existing character. I will make more but for now, have a caecilian libarian (unnamed rn, he/him) and his bobbit worm college medical student friend (she/her her name is mosiac also)
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Remembrance of the Flame adoptable taurs pack Sold
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This wouldn't happen to me if i were a huge dragon
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What you can’t see is me with the controller panicking and yelling
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i rlly hope it gets easier soon bc i am fucking losing my mind
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a fraction of my lulubell scribble pages
im very normal about her btw
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