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[youcouldcallitfiction]

February 24, 2021

Do people still come on here? Not judging, just kinda forgot about this platform and I remembered I still had the app on my phone, hidden away in a folder.

Just wanted to write things out I guess...

Yesterday my boyfriend told me that his brother told him back in 2016 that the bitch that used to be my BFF was really hurt by our “friendbreakup”, that she was “really sad” over it and he should try to get me to try to work things out with her and my sweet angel baby of a boyfriend told him that the issue is between me & her and if I wanted to talk and work things out, then I would.

We were best friends for about 8 years when we stopped talking. In hindsight and self evaluation, I have realized she was never really my friend. I was just her lackey. She wanted things to go well for me just so that I wouldn’t have anything to complain about but she felt she was the main character even in my story.

She wanted me to stay under her control, wrapped around her finger, and she fantasized ALOUD, that I was in love with her but she wasn’t in love with me. She would tell me that all the time, that if I was a lesbian or a boy I would TOTALLY be in love with her and she would TOTALLY friendzone me. I guess to make me feel not cute? She did little jabs like that all the time to knock me down a peg. If I ever had any complaint or went against her in any way, she would gaslight me and make me believe I’m crazy or stupid for feeling that way. I became SCARED of standing up to her. Literal anxiety, so I cried a lot and she called me a crybaby, anyway. She tried to isolate me and got mad if I ever got anything good that she couldn’t get, be it a good grade, or any help whatsoever from my parents...

So she never really cared for me. I was hurt too when SHE broke up the friendship in 2016. All I did was call her bluff this time. I made sure to remember what led up to that point because she had “broken up with me” at least 4 times before in the 8 years of our best friendship. And every time I BEGGED her to take me back and I apologized and apologized until our friendship was whole again.

This time though, when she did it again, I had just returned from Hawaii for my birthday trip. Of course she was jealous that I didn’t invite her but we had been fighting a lot and it was a family trip (and my family never liked her). My boyfriend and I were celebrating our 4 year anniversary as well, so of course he HAD been invited on the trip. And she texted me a late happy birthday and that we needed to talk when I came back. Of course I was done with all her shit at this point. So when she told me that we shouldn’t be best friends anymore, I just said “okay, have a good life then”

And she said “DON’T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!” and another fight ensued... but for me it felt like SUCH a weight off my shoulders! Like I could breathe again! I felt free of the shackles of her bullshit self-imposed drama. Like I had Stockholm syndrome and I had finally woken up and seen her as the terrible, manipulative, emotionally abusive, gaslighting monster she is.

And yes, of course, a couple weeks later she texts me with an inside joke, hoping to bridge that gap again, get me giggling and hopefully in her net again. I can’t say I ignored her, I replied to her and laughed. And we texted for a bit and then of course she blew up at me again over a stupid lamp so I ignored her again. Eventually she’ll show her true colors.

2 years later, In 2018 after not talking for awhile she sent me a message asking if we could meet up for some coffee or some shit and we could talk and that she’s had a lot of time to think about everything that happened and has had some time to grow and she really wanted to sit and talk with me face to face. I denied her that pleasure. She wasn’t really “grown” it’s her same manipulation to her current friends (who at the time her new best friend was my boyfriends sister cus oh yea did I forget to mention she’s dating my boyfriends brother?) she wanted to make herself seem like the bigger person by reaching out to me. And I was going to ignore it and leave her on read... but I replied after talking to my lovely eyebrow artist and I told her that I’ve had a lot of time to think and learn too and that I didn’t feel we had anything to talk about. Water under the bridge and so on and so forth. Diplomatic bullshit. It will never be water under the bridge but it’s always a game with her. So I had to word my reply carefully. She probably still went and told them “see? I tried! She’s the unreasonable one!” But you can’t reason with a sociopath so why should I put myself back in that situation? Just the thought of meeting her anywhere makes me wanna throw up. Anxiety on HIGH. I’m not exaggerating either, I will literally throw up.

Of course I’m not completely free of her yet. Who knows if I ever will be? But I won’t let myself forgive her or forget all the damage I’m still working to undo. So she was “hurt” by our breakup. Cry me a fucking river then. You reap what you sow, bitch. Eventually your actions have consequences. You sanded away every good feeling I had for you. There’s nothing left.

[youcouldcallitfiction]

it's 2022. donald trump has died in disgrace days after being impeached and jailed. my chemical romance's new album is coming out the same day as the new spiderverse movie. the lizzo and janelle monaé collab song is blowing up the radio. lil nas x has a verse in it. you and your partner have time and energy for dates after work after jeff bezos' assets have been seized and distributed to the public in the wake of his arrest for keeping employees in unsafe working conditions.

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Tiny little inch worm is determined to make it across a gap 

(via)

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oh my god [sound on]

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every writing tip article and their mother: dont ever use adverbs ever!

me, shoveling more adverbs onto the page because i do what i want: just you fucking try and stop me

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I’ll send you my love on a wire Lift you up, everytime Everyone, ooo, pulls away, ooo, from you

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rami just ran by in front of my car lmfao

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losing my mind over this

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the other night i tried to make a curry and i got chilli burns all over my face, so i thought to myself ‘hang on, doesn’t milk soothe chilli burns? it does’ and i couldn’t google because i couldn’t see so i just had to blindly feel my way to the fridge and pour out a bowl of milk, and then plant my face in the bowl of milk, anyway at that point the rice cooker went off and triggered a power surge which turned my electricity off, which i didn’t notice at first because i had my face in a bowl of milk and when i did emerge from the dairy prison i thought i had gone blind with chilli burns. so no i don’t really cook much.

[youcouldcallitfiction]

I can’t believe there are people out there that haven’t seen this before

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I rarely have a visceral reaction to a TikTok but this one... this one got me

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