youjustgotmerasmused

[youjustgotmerasmused]

Send “I’m sorry for your loss.” for my muse to talk about a loved one that has passed on.

[youjustgotmerasmused]

The snake was thrashing about, trying to get out of the tight grip of the tentacles. A forked tongue eventually slid out and hissed something out from a lipless mouth.

“Releasssseee Merassssmussss!” It seethed, a green eye glistening with not only magic, but fury.

There is a giant snake lurking in the pipe and underground of Teufort. No he’s not sulking. Shut up.

[youjustgotmerasmused]

There is a giant snake lurking in the pipe and underground of Teufort. No he’s not sulking. Shut up.

[youjustgotmerasmused]

I thought you and soldier were married. Or maybe that was soldier and Lt. Bites.

“If I had, at any point, been Married to that Oaf- we would have long since divorced with a HELLISH show of lawyers.”

[youjustgotmerasmused]

“It has come to Merasmus’ attention...

“That certain Individuals are being “shipped” with myself.

Such as ... Nick,”

He let out a disgusted hiss, before continuing.

“Soldier...”

A frustrated groan,

“and...bafflingly.. The Horseless Headless Horsemann...”

“Now... Merasmus isn’t sure WHY individuals would take the time to imagine scenarios being involved with any of those beings- as they all are... ill-suited.

The final one should be obvious- seeing as the Horseless Headless Horsemann, is a very busy being- no time at all for any sort of romance, not to mention he is- very dead and therefore, hardly a coversationalist by any means.

So stop imagining it.”

[youjustgotmerasmused]

FEAR YOUR TRAINING ROOM, MORTALS

FOR I HAVE CURSED ONE IN EVERY TEN OBJECTS WITHIN IT...

TO EXPLODE!

[youjustgotmerasmused]

“BEGONE FROM MY TOWER THIS INSTANT.”

LOUD ENRAGED SCREAMING

“NO I DID NOT SUMMON YOU, AND I DON’T LIKE THAT TONE.”

FURIOUS WARBLING

“WELL YOU’LL JUST HAVE TO COME BACK WHEN IT’S TIME, THEN, WON’T YOU? IT IS NOT MERASMUS’ FAULT YOU’RE A THOUSAND YEARS TOO EARLY”

CHALKBOARD SCREECHING

“You simply cannot reason with eldritch abominations sometimes... GO BACK TO YOUR OWN REALM.”

[youjustgotmerasmused]

“Something to torment the masses with? Replacing their corn with candy corn cobs or some such. Can’t eat it, bad for trading.. who knows. The minds of demons are rather- unpredictable.”

“I believe it was actually some sort of bored lesser demon… if Merasmus recalls history correctly.”

[youjustgotmerasmused]

“I believe it was actually some sort of bored lesser demon... if Merasmus recalls history correctly.”

“If… it wasnt you… then who? Some peasant… that stuck… a corn in… sugar water?”

[youjustgotmerasmused]

“Contrary to many’s beliefs around here. Merasmus doesn’t always live to torment you pathetic mortals..

so for the thousandth time, NO Merasmus did not invent candy corn.

Stop asking.”

[youjustgotmerasmused]

“YOU FOOLS! AS SOON AS THE NINTH MONTH HAS ENDED AND DIED, MERASMUS RISES AGAIN!”

“AHAHAHAHAHAHAH AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA-

wait, what do you mean I’m two days late?”

[youjustgotmerasmused]

"No no. I know many people and of many substances... Lyrium was one of the worst, but then again trying to prove that was...unpleasant at the least."

“For any magicians or prospective magicians, mages, or users of magic: if you try taking something to enhance your magic, you’ll quickly get addicted to the substance and the enhancement to your magic.”

[youjustgotmerasmused]

Wait For It

(in response to the Hamilton Bootleg drama… our fandom should consider taking advice from Burr) 

[youjustgotmerasmused]

“For any magicians or prospective magicians, mages, or users of magic: if you try taking something to enhance your magic, you’ll quickly get addicted to the substance and the enhancement to your magic.”

[youjustgotmerasmused]

He watched the entire spectacle with a sort of detached assessment. It was unsettling of course, but he wasn’t going to lose his head. He was just going to observe the whole thing and see what would come of it.

Maybe he’d gotten cynical in his old age. Something to think about until he got shattered or eroded. Would he be able to think in pieces? That was a real question. The crackle of the whole thing washed over him. Being that close to the object of that much supernatural force was going to leave some sort of effect. But eventually only the orange green purple taste of lingering magic in the air was left and Prawn seemed to have an answer.

“So what are they? I assume they gave you an answer either way. So please tell me if I’m going to need to strike a pose soon or not.”

💘!

It began with a tightness in his extremities. He’d been concerned at first he’d missed a dose of his heart medication. He thought over the morning’s events, and no- he had taken the medication. He walked to the kitchen to grab some water- thinking himself dehydrated.

But as he reached for the glass, his fingers were stiff and uncooperative…and a grey color. He rubbed them together and the texture alarmed him, as did the lack of feeling. His heart thumping in his chest, he blustered out of the kitchen and ran to consult some cards.

He didn’t know what was happening, and that terrified him. But when he finally got some idea- he was even more so. He didn’t know how to reverse this. He was going to die- or as good as it could get in his case. Eternity as an unfeeling, but still sentient, statue.

[youjustgotmerasmused]

“It is more like I believe you won’t rip the fabric of the universe apart if I give you any sort of powerful artifact. No one else I know would have the courtesy to try and keep from grasping at power they don’t comprehend.” He didn’t bother to comment on the other’s apology. He wasn’t holding grievances at this point. Prawn explained himself too, so why bother with being angry.

He didn’t want his last emotion before he was stone to be anger. He didn’t want it to be a lot of things. Another large sigh, and he coughed some. He felt like such a fool.

“....Six thousand years and nothing to show for it.... I still don’t want to die but maybe it’s better this way.”

💘!

It began with a tightness in his extremities. He’d been concerned at first he’d missed a dose of his heart medication. He thought over the morning’s events, and no- he had taken the medication. He walked to the kitchen to grab some water- thinking himself dehydrated.

But as he reached for the glass, his fingers were stiff and uncooperative…and a grey color. He rubbed them together and the texture alarmed him, as did the lack of feeling. His heart thumping in his chest, he blustered out of the kitchen and ran to consult some cards.

He didn’t know what was happening, and that terrified him. But when he finally got some idea- he was even more so. He didn’t know how to reverse this. He was going to die- or as good as it could get in his case. Eternity as an unfeeling, but still sentient, statue.

[youjustgotmerasmused]

I saw this at Red Robin’s and I knew what had to be done