zovioliswritings - Tumblr blog

[zovioliswritings]

 Raphael rubbed his palms on his pants, his hands feeling clammy. Bouncing his knee at a rapid pace in hopes to calm his nerves. His thoughts rampaging through his head as he glanced down at his watch once again, watching the second hand tick by agonizingly slow as another minute passed by. 

She was late. Not even just a little late either, its been nearly thirty minutes since school has been let out and here he was. Still waiting for her under the bleachers. 

Raph bit the inside of his cheek, anger and embarrassment bubbling up inside his chest. Knowing he must look like an absolute fool for waiting here. After another minute passed by he finally stood up from his spot on the ground. An aggressive grumble leaving his chest as he stood. Slinging his back pack over his shoulder. 

“I knew it...” He muttered bitterly to himself, turning to leave just as a flash of brown hair flew around the corner. Leaving him no time to react as this person crashed into him. For supposedly being a well trained ninja, though he would never admit this to anyone, this sudden action caught him off guard. Causing him to stumble back a few feet. His hands resting on their shoulders, ready to push them away with an aggressive remark, but stopped when he noticed who it was. 

His heart instantly softening at the sight of her. Watching her chest heave as she struggled to breath, knowing she must have sprinted the whole way here. A soft blush warming his cheeks when she rested her forehead on his chest. 

“I-I’m...” She started, desperately trying to catch her breath, “I’m so so so...so sorry I’m late.”  Her breaths soon slowed down to normal as she quickly tried to explain tardiness. “Ms. Lyn got really pissed with my class and as punishment held us back really really late and-”

Raph gave a hesitant chuckle, cutting her off as he gently patted her shoulders. “It’s...It’s alright shorty....I didn’t really expect you to come anyway..” His voice trailed off at the end, his eyes drifting away from her and to the ground next to them. 

She looked up to him finally, her brows knitting together. “Huh? What are you talking about Red? Of course I came...I promised, didn’t I?”

She watched as his eyes widened slightly, having not realized he said that last part out loud. 

“Y-yeah I mean...I-I know you’re busy with other things and what not..” He struggled to brush off what he said, desperately trying to regain his normal tough exterior. But with her it was hard, just looking at her could bring him to his knees. 

“Red...” She started, her hands gently resting on his chest. Moving a little to where her face was in his line of sight. ”You should know by now, that I don’t ever break a promise... 

[zovioliswritings]

Hello everyone! It's been a long while since I've been able to just sit back, relax and write. I've gone through so much writers block lately, along with my job taking up most of my time since this whole Covid thing started and getting ready for my upcoming LPN classes.

Anyway I just wanted to say that I should be getting Help Me, part 3 posted up by this weekend. I also plan to get It's my fault, part 2 and Southern, part 3 up by this weekend as well but I can't make any promises on those.

I hope you all have been doing well these past few months! If you have any questions about what I've written so far (or have any questions in general) or want to request something, don't hesitate! I'll gladly answer anything.

[zovioliswritings]

Southern, part 2

A heavy sigh escaped my chest as I closed the door to my apartment, resting my back against it. My backpack strap slipping from my shoulder, causing it to fall to the ground with a thud. My legs screaming at me for taking the stairs rather than elevator. I mean, at first it seemed like a good idea to get in some last minute exercise for the day, but after going up seven flights I am almost regretting that decision. 

Resting there for a few moments before my stomach growled for me to move. Guiding me to the kitchen and straight to the fridge. Lazily looking over everything I had, looking for any that would be easiest to make. Deciding upon a bowl of Captain Crunch. 

After making myself a large bowl, I headed into the living room. Settling onto the couch and switching on the TV. Watching as the news popped onto my screen. Only half listening as they talked about what the weather was going to be like for the next week. My thoughts starting to drift off to other things as I slowly started to zone out. The sound of the TV nearly drowned out before it suddenly captured my attention just by a single word, vigilantes.

Quickly snapped out of my thoughts as I watched the news anchors start to talk about how the infamous vigilantes had once again rounded up another small group of this gang called the Purple Dragon. Watching intently as my thoughts drifted back to the night I was backed into the alley. Granted its been a few weeks since then, but it feels like it was just yesterday. What stuck out most to me was the small moment at the end, when I had seen a figure on the rooftops. Wondering if maybe it had been them. Kicking myself slightly for the fact that I didn’t turn back and look. Maybe I would have gotten a better glance at them. Maybe I would have been able to put a face to the one’s that saved me. Maybe be able to give them a proper thank you. 

But there was nothing I could do about it now, I doubt I would ever see them again. No one has been able to find them and the chances of me finding them are little to none. I barely knew my way around the city to be able to get to my apartment, the small convenient store down the street and to school. How in the world was I supposed to find someone that didn’t even want to be found?

A sigh left my lips as I looked down to my cereal, taking the last bite of it before downing all the milk. Turning off the TV as I got up to put the bowl in the sink.  Lazily deciding to wait until later to clean it as I turned and walked to my room. Grabbing my headphones before going to the window by my bed.

A small smile tugging at my lips when I saw the sun had almost completely disappeared from the sky. Plugging my headphones into my phone, I opened the window. Climbing onto the fire escape and making my way to the roof. Sitting on the edge as I turned on my music. Closing my eyes as I let the music drift me away. A smile tugging at my lips as the country tunes making my soul yearn for home. 

With the music drowning out the real world, I could almost pretend that the gentle wind carried the fresh scent of our farm. I could pretend to hear the faint sounds of our live stock settling down for the night. The peacefulness of it all, I could pretend I was really there. But the moment I opened my eyes, my smile would fade and my heart would ache. Having tilted my head up to face the night sky, but it wasn’t the same. Even though the sun had completely left the sky and night had taken over, there wasn’t a star in sight. 

Sure, there were a couple lights that twinkled in the distance similar to that of a star, but I knew deep down that it was just a satellite. Back home stars were scattered across the night sky like a work of art. But now the sky was nothing but a black canvas with a lonely moon. My soul ached for the moon, knowing exactly how it must feel to be so lonely. 

I bit the inside of my cheek when my vision began to blur. Taking my headphones out as I held back the tears. Pushing back these feelings I thought that I had gotten a hold on and started to make my way back to my apartment window. Stopping mid-motion of hopping back onto the fire escape when some movement out of the corner of my eye catch my attention. 

Looking to my left, I noticed what looked like something or someone jumping the rooftops a few buildings down from me. Blinking a few times squinting my eyes to try and make sure I wasn’t seeing things. Getting my phone out once again to help aid my poor eyesight. Pulling up the camera in hopes that maybe I could catch a decent picture that would explain what it was. My heart stopping when my camera flashed as I took the picture. 

Hesitating as I looked up to see that whoever it was had either stopped moving or disappeared from my sight. Knowing full well that I had screwed up big time, I didn’t waste any time to scramble back down the fire escape and jump into my apartment. Slamming my window shut and locking it. My heart pounding in my chest as I quickly turned off the light and hid on the other side of my bed.

Almost stuffing myself under the bed as I looked to the window. Watching it intensely, almost half expecting something to appear. A sigh of relief leaving my lungs when nothing happened after a few minutes. Crawling from under the bed and sitting on top of it. Letting my heart settle for a moment before pulling out my phone. My hands shaking as I pulled up the camera, my brows frowning together when I pulled up the picture. 

Not really sure what to make of it. I mostly just got an outline of whoever it was, but their outline didn’t quite match up with what a human figure was supposed to look like. 

An uneasy feeling settled into my stomach the more I looked at this picture. Knowing without a doubt that I had stumbled upon something I most likely shouldn't have. Tossing my phone to the side, I got ready for bed. Wanting to shake this feeling and forget it all even happened.

Oh how only if I had known before hand of what was going to happen next. To know how much a simple picture was going to change my life forever.

[zovioliswritings]

Help me, part 2

Hearing the creature speak completely snapped me from my thoughts. Bringing me back into focus, my heart squeezing as I finally took notice of the large wounds that laced every part of the poor things body. Blood nearly soaking the floor around him.

I couldn’t move, I tried to speak but words wouldn’t form. My mind began running at a million thoughts per second again. This can’t be real, there’s no way that any of this is real. I have to be seeing things, not only can he not be real, but there’s no way that my parents are involved in something like this. This is wrong, my parents would never torture a living being. This all had to be some bad dream, right? I went to pinch myself when the creature began to cry. Speaking once more.  “P-please I don’t care what you do, just make it stop...” He sobbed softly, his legs starting to shake. Probably far weaker than he expected them to be as they started to give out. “..I wanna go h-home..” He cried. My heart breaking as I watched the creature kneel back down onto the floor. Crying into his hands. 

Before I even knew what I was doing, I was upstairs grabbing our med kit. Grabbing everything I could possibly need before I went back. Standing in front of the cage for a moment. Calming my racing heart before I slowly unlocked the cage. Watching the creature closely as I quietly stepping inside as settling next to him. Being careful not to sit down in the puddle of blood.

The creature hesitantly looked up to me, eyes widened slightly. As if he truly didn’t expect me to actually lend a helping hand.  “It’s okay, I’m not going to hurt you.” I cooed softly, “I just want to help.” Scooting closer, I gently reached for his left arm after dipping a wash cloth into a bucket of warm water. Frowning when he flinched under my touch as I gently grabbed his wrist. Being extra gentle when I began to clean the wounds. Whispering soft apologizes every time he flinched. Silence hung over us like a heavy cloud. Biting my lip, hesitantly for a few moment’s before I spoke. 

“Wh-hat are y....what’s your name?” I muttered softly, changing my question last second. Figuring that my first question might have been rather rude. I could feel him stiffen up slightly at my question, as if debating whether to answer me or not.  “M-michelangelo...” He answered softly after a few moments, hesitantly looking to my face. “B-but my brothers and friends call me Mikey...” A gentle smile pulled at my lips,” Mikey? I like that, its a cute name.”

He sniffled, a tiny smile tugging at his lips as he gave a small chuckle. “T-thank you....w-who are you?” His eyes fell back down to my hands. Watching as I started to bandage the wounds. “My name’s Y/N,” I glance up at him, flashing a friendly smile before moving over to his other arm. “Mikey...if you don’t mind me asking you...w-who did this to you? And how did you get here?”

I watched him bite his bottom lip from the corner of my eye. Flinching slightly once again as I patted one of his wounds dry. He hesitated once again before answering honestly. 

“I-I’m not sure on who they’re names are...Baxter Stockman knows them though. That’s who originally captured me, but I guess he had too much press watching his every move to hold me or something. So he handed me off to these two other scientists to do the messy work while he was busy....” I froze at the mention of that name. Instantly recognizing it as one of my parents  coworkers. My hands starting to tremble as my thoughts went to my parents. Knowing this confirmed everything. That they truly were the one’s behind this. I bit my lip to hold back the tears, furious that my parents could do this. I quickly turned my attention back to his wounds. Finishing up his bandages as our conversation was quickly replaced with silence. 

My thoughts running and running, trying to figure out what to do next. There was no way I was going to leave him down here for my parents to torture again. But what could I do?

I looked up to him, studying his beautiful baby blues. Hoping maybe that they would hold an answer.  He tilted his head to the side, “What? Is there something on my face?”

I gave a small chuckle,” No no...just thinking...you said something about wanting to go home....where do you live?” “Here in New York, in the sewers to be more exact.” He gave a small embarrassed chuckle. “It’s actually not as bad as one may think.” “Oh yea- wait did you say New York?” My heart dropped slightly as the sudden realization.  “Yeah? What’s wrong?” 

“Mikey....you’re not in New York...you’re...you’re in the small town of Kilgore Texas...” 

“W-what?” His eyes widened in disbelief, hope draining from his eyes. “H-how....”

A frown tugged at my lips, “Hey it’s going to be okay. I’m going to find a way to get you home?” “How?” “I’m....I’m not sure but I’m going to figure it out...” I bit my lip once more. Pulling out my phone to check the time. My heart stopping when I saw it was already 5:45. In fifteen minutes my parents would be clocking out and be home in no time. I quickly scrambled to my feet and stepped outside of the cage. Pacing as I tried to think of what to do. I needed to get him out of here, I couldn’t leave him to suffer another night with my parents. Besides, once they got home they would instantly know I was down here. 

“Damn it...” Looking to Mikey, “Okay so I don’t really have a plan, but I’m sure we can think of it as we go. Do you think you can walk?” “If it means getting out of here, I’ll learn to fly if you need me to.” I giggled at his response, helping him stand up.  “As cool as that would be, it’s not necessary.” 

And with that I helped him up the stairs and into my car. Thanking the heavens that no one was outside to see us. Opening the back passenger door and folding the back seats down, hoping there was enough room in the back for him to be comfortable. Seeing as my poor little Jeep Wrangler wasn’t exactly built for someone of his size. After getting him settled, I ran back inside the house, grabbing a couple change of clothes and everything I might need. Debating back and forth whether or not to bring my phone before tossing it on my bed. Deciding it would be better to leave it.

With one last glance over my room, I slung the strap to my travel bag over my shoulder and fled downstairs and back to my car. Starting the engine and pulling out of the drive. Peeling down the street, not knowing exactly where I was taking us next or what the road before us would hold. But I hoped upon everything that I could get him to New York safely. 

[zovioliswritings]

Broken promises

Mikey x fem reader

The world seemed to move in slow motion as she looked to the TV, her grandfather having flipped to the news station. All the noise from her noisy family slowly came to a stop as they all looked to the TV. The screams echoed throughout the room, from those that tried to leave the burning building as the news archer tried to speak over them. Her pounding heart dropping into her stomach when she caught sight of the buildings name.  “No.....” She whispered, stepping closer to the TV. ‘please for the love of god no...’ 

Scanning every inch of the scene, her heart stopping when she noticed a familiar figure pass by one of the windows near the top of the building. 

‘hurry up and get out of there-’ 

Not even a moment later the building suddenly collapsed and as it did her world seemed to come to a stop. Unable to move as she just watched piles of burning rumble. Hoping, pray from any sign of him. Seconds passed, then minutes and there was still nothing. 

The world slowly sped back up as she pulled out her phone. Fingers trembling as she dialed his number. He didn’t answer so she tried again.

“Just an in and out mission” 

He said.

“It’ll be simple and easy.”

He said.

Tears started to well up in her eyes as she tried to get a hold of the others.

“I’ll be safe, don’t worry.”

He promised.

“Damn it,” Her tears welled up and over. Streaming down her face when she couldn’t get a hold of anyone. Running up to her room, she quickly grabbed her things and ran back down stairs. Giving her mother a kiss on the cheek and a soft apology for leaving so quickly. The rest of her family telling her to be safe on the road as she ran out the front door, knowing that they couldn’t stop her.  

Jumping into her car, she peeled out of the driveway and down the street. Broken sobs wrecking her chest as she drove as fast as her car would let her. But it wasn’t fast enough, not to her at least. Even as she drove down the empty highway, going 110, it still didn’t feel like it was fast enough. Especially with every voice mail she got. 

Why wasn’t anyone answering? She needed to know if they were okay, if HE was okay. She needed to hear his voice, to hear him say he was alright. If he wasn’t...she didn’t know what she was going to do.

With an aggravated cry, she threw her phone to the passenger side after she was meet with yet another voicemail. Giving the clock on her dash another glance. 8:38. It was already late and she still had at least two more hours until she made it to New York. Pushing the gas pedal all the way to the floor, watching her speed quickly pick up even more. The world going by in just a blur, her only focus was getting to New York and finding him. 

- - -

When she got to New York, she was suddenly met with heavy non-moving traffic. Spilling out a few choice words, she got out of her car. Slamming the door shut as she took off in a sprint. Heading straight to the lair, her lungs screaming as her breaths come out in hard puffs. Coming to a stop at the entrance of the lair. Quickly finding a pretty banged up Raphael getting patched up by April on the couch. At the sound of her voice, they both jumped.

“W-where...where is he?”

“Y/N? How did you-” April started as she stood up, but was quickly cut off by Y/N.

“Where is he?” She demanded this time. Her voice hard and desperate.  Raph frowned. “Y/N ya really sho-”

“I will NOT fucking ask again.” April jumped back a bit in shock. Y/N hardly ever swore, especially towards them. “He’s in Donnie’s lab...” Without another word, Y/N marched to the purple turtles lab. Grabbing a hold of the door handle, hesitating for a moment. Giving herself a small moment to prepare herself for what could be behind the door. Hoping and praying to anything that could hear her thoughts that everything was going to be okay. With one last calming breath she opened the door. 

Oh, how she wished she had giving herself a few moments longer. Maybe even a few minutes, but that might not have been anywhere close to long enough to prepare her for what she saw. 

Donatello stood next to the medal table, making quick and precise movements as he finished patching up his younger brother (who laid on the table unconscious). Leonardo stood on the other side of the table, looking down at Michelangelo. Blood covered his hands, having been the one who helped Donnie. A aura of guilt and sorrow hung over him like a cloak. 

Y/N looked back to Mikey and everything else in the room seemed to disappear as her tears returned. Bandages almost covered every inch of her beloved turtle. The gentle rise and fall of his chest and the soft beeping from some monitor Donnie had him hooked up to was all the indication she had that he was alive. 

A whimper managed to escape her throat, catching the two’s attention. Donnie frowned as he said her name softly, taking a step towards her. His heart breaking even more when her eyes never left Mikey. Taking a few steps, he stood in front of her and pulled her into his arms. Blocking her view from his younger brother in hopes that it might help. Holding her tighter when she began to sob in his chest. 

“H-he said he’d b-be okay,” She whimpered, burying herself into his plastron. “He p-promised me.” “I know...” Donnie said softly, gently rubbing her back. Watching Leo come up beside them. Both of them sharing a frown. “Hey Y/N...lets go sit down in the living room.” He offered, resting his hand gently on their shoulder.  “N-no.” Y/N wiggled from Donnie’s arms and squeezed passed them. Instantly by Mikey’s side. “I can’t leave him..” “Y/N...” Leo started, but Donnie stopped him.  “Let’s just leave her alone for a few moments, Leo.” Donnie said as he headed for the door. This earned a sad sigh from the leader. Giving one last glance to the two. His heart breaking as he watched his brothers lover pull up a chair next to him and gently grab his hand. Giving his knuckles a gentle kiss as she tried to hold back her sobs. 

Leo’s head hung low as he left, Donnie following right behind him. Leaving Y/N to cry her heart out as she watched over Mikey. Making her mind up then and there that she was never going to leave his side again....

[zovioliswritings]

Help me, part 1

I threw a goodbye over my shoulder to my parents as I was grabbing a drink from the fridge. Hearing the front door open and close, followed by the sound of their car starting a few moments after. 

‘They sure are in a rush to get to work.’ I thought to myself when I only got a short “bye” and “love you” in response. 

With a quick shrug of my shoulders, I easily brushed it off. Taking a small swing from my drink before sitting at the kitchen table. Relaxing in the silence of our home. More than happy that I got the house all to myself. With my parents being gone at work until around 6 tonight and today being a Saturday, that meant I could be lazy and binge watch my favorite show all day long. 

Looking around the kitchen, I began to plan what kind of snacks to make. Heading for the snack cabinet to see if we still had any thin mints. Stopping mid way when I noticed something. Looking to the small room next to the fridge, I noticed that our basement door was slightly open. Which was rather strange, my parents always made sure to keep that door closed. As everyone else besides them where ‘forbidden’ from entering. My parents even joked about having to kill anyone who dared to enter. They have a very dark and twisted sense of humor. 

I’ve never gone down there myself, ‘cause if I’m honest I’m a bit of a good-two-shoes. That and I don’t wish to be grounded or thrown out of the house for going down there. So I spare the door one more glance before going about my day. Grabbing all the snacks I wanted and headed to the living room. Settling down on the couch and turning on the TV. Going to Netflix and clicking my favorite show, more than ready to pick back up where I left it off. Pushing play as I snuggled into the couch’s throw blanket. 

~

A a few hours passed, looking to my phone I saw it was only 3:45. A sigh left my lips as I looked back to the TV. Biting the inside of my cheek when I couldn’t concentrate on the show. My thoughts continuously drifting back to the basement door. Glancing over to the kitchen, my curiosity eating away at me.  “One little peak couldn’t hurt right?” I tried to reason as I slipped off the couch. Slowly making my way back into the kitchen. Soon standing right in front of the basement door. Biting my bottom lip as I grabbed the door handle. Freezing for a moment, going over every possible scenario that could happen if I were caught and what could be down there. 

Taking a deep breath, I closed my eyes as I opened the door the rest of the way. Listening for any noise, slowly opening my eyes when I heard nothing. My stomach churned slightly at the sight of the basement stairs going down into a pit of darkness. Looking to the right I was relieved to see a light switch, feeling much better when I turned it on. Leaning down, trying to see as much of the basement as I could from the top. But all I could really see was the concert floors and the corner of a table. 

I bit the inside of my cheek once more. Looking at the time, it was only 3:50. I had more than enough time to give the basement a quick look and be back up before they even clocked out from work. Slipping my phone into my back pocket, I hesitantly started to make my way downstairs. 

The more I made it down the stairs, the more I could see. And it wasn’t anything too exciting. The place was in this organised but cluttered state. There were papers and sticky notes all over one of the walls. It looked like some science lab, which wasn’t a surprise. Seeing as my parents are some big time scientists. 

I tried to read some of the notes, but couldn’t understand most of it. As much as math and science were my parents strong point, I lacked heavily in it. All I could make out of it was something to do with mutagen in cells. Moving from the notes, I looked to the two large tables at the center of the room. Finding all sorts of vials full of green and purple liquid, along with other science equipment. Moving to the other table, I found trays of what seemed like tissue samples and other things next to a microscope. This table also had an arrangement of different medical equipment scattered around it. More or less the stuff you’d find in a surgery room. 

That wouldn’t have bothered me any had it not been for the blood that laced some of the blades. A chill running down my spine as I wondered  who’s blood that could be. As my eyes trailed over each blade, my heart nearly dropped to the floor when I heard something move behind me. My thoughts instantly went to my parents, knowing almost without a doubt that I’ve been caught. My heart started to race as I tried to think of some way to explain this to them. Slowly turning around, I was rather surprised to find that my parents weren’t there. But in the darker corner of the room, under the staircase, I noticed something move. 

I blinked, rather surprised that I had totally missed the giant cage that sat snugly under the stairs. Taking a few hesitant steps closer, it was my stomachs turn to drop. My hand reaching up to my mouth as I stared at the creature inside the cage. Unable to believe what I was seeing. There was no way that a large, humanoid looking turtle was inside that cage right now. My heart hammering in my chest as I watched it stand up, leaning against the cage for support. The creature easily standing a few inches taller than me. 

I was stuck in just awe of this creature that I nearly jumped when it suddenly spoke. 

“P-please.....please help me..” It begged, its voice sounding hoarse and broken. I watched as tears filled its baby blue eyes. “O-or kill me...I don’t care..just please...” 

[zovioliswritings]

Southern, part 1

(honestly don’t know what to call this one nor do I know where I’m going with it 😅 so just sit and enjoy the ride I guess?)

The cool air nipped at my skin as I tried to snuggle further under my jacket. Walking swiftly down the sidewalk while my thoughts ran at its own pace. Bouncing around from subject to subject. From my new classes that I’m barely passing, to this city. How its so different compared to my small country side town back in Texas. Not only was it so much colder up here, but going from farm houses and wooded areas to a concrete jungle is such a shock. I never thought there would be a day where I missed seeing trees or farm land. I was becoming so home sick, but I couldn’t go back. Not yet. I had promised Ma that I would try my hardest and get this stupid degree and I can’t back down already when its only been three weeks....

I looked up to the night sky and frowned when I could only barely see the stars. ‘Three weeks...its only been three weeks.’ Three weeks and I hadn’t made a single friend, let alone even really talked to anyone here. I stuck out like a sore thumb here with my cowboy boots, hat, and flannel shirt. I hated it. I hated the sideways glances and the whispers, they knew I didn’t belong here and they had no plans on welcoming me in. Probably figuring I find my place and head back home before too long.

Shaking my head, I tried to focus on something else before I upset myself even further. Looking around, I forced myself to come to a stop. Suddenly realizing I had no idea where in the hell I was.  “Shit...” I muttered under my breath as I pulled out my phone. Pulling up google maps. “Now where in the hell did I take a wrong turn..?” My brows knitted together as I tried to figure the map out. Faintly hearing someone walk up behind me. Jumping slightly when I heard a man’s voice. “My my, what’s a pretty little thing like you doing around here?” His gruff voice asked, I could almost hear the smirk on his face before I saw it when I turned around. Finding him standing directly behind me with four other guys standing behind him.  “A-ah um....I’m just a little lost....trying to find my way back to my apartment.” I muttered, trying to not seem intimated by them all as I took a step back. Though it seems I failed miserably as this only just invited him to take a step closer as the rest of the group started to surround me. 

“Well we can show you how to get there. That is if you play with us a little first.” His smirk grew, giving me a sick feeling in my stomach. 

“I-its alright, I think I know where to go from here.” I slipped my phone into my back pocket to free up my hands. “T-thanks for the offer though...”

“Oh that wasn’t an offer sweetie.” He took a step closer to me.

“I really w-wouldn’t do that, sir.” Biting the inside of my cheek, shifting on my feet slightly. Ready for whenever he made a move.  “Ooo, acting tough now aren’t we~” He chuckled mockingly as he grabbed my arm. “I like it when-” He couldn’t even finish his sentence before I grabbed a hold of his wrist and without hesitation I twisted his hand off me before socking him in the jaw. A clear and sickening pop ringing through the air after my fist made contact. My heart hammering in my chest as I watched him stumbled back a few steps. Rubbing his jaw before spitting a bit of blood onto the ground.  “Oh...you’re gonna regret that..” He growled, nodding to the others before nodding to me. Panic settling in as they all made their way to me. I looked around at them all before making a split second decision. Running towards the skinniest one out of the group (who looked like he couldn’t have weighed more than a buck fifteen) and rammed my shoulder into him. Easily knocking him to the ground and slipping away before he could properly get a hold of me. Sprinting as fast as I could from the group, zigzagging though streets and alleys. They were still hot on my tail, yelling all kinds of profanities at me about what they were going to do if they caught me. 

Taking another turn down an alley, my heart dropped. Finding myself at a dead end. I swore under my breath and turned around just as they rounded the corner. Blocking my only exit. 

“Well well, looks like you’ve taken another wrong turn~” He sneered, him and his buddies panting softly. Catching their breath before slowly stalking towards me. 

I looked around for anything to at least arm myself with. Settling with a long piece of metal pipe. Twirling it in my hand before bracing myself. 

“Now now my dear, you don’t have to make this any harder on yourself.” He started, my hands trembling. Not seeing any way possible that I was going to make it out alive. Even if I fight back I doubt I could take them all on at once. 

Just when they were ten feet from me, the lights in the alley all suddenly went out. Surrounding us in complete darkness.  “Oh shit..” I heard one of them say. “Not again.” Another groaned fearfully.  “Not again..?” I took a couple steps back. Jumping when my back touched a wall. Flinching when I heard the sounds of the group screaming and fighting something. Making my heart race even more as I lowered myself to the ground, Curling up into a ball and closing my eyes, hoping that whatever it was didn’t see me. After a few minutes it suddenly went quiet, save for a few small groans and whimpers from what I can only assume is the guys that were chasing me. 

I slowly opened my eyes. Surprised to see the lights were back on and the group of guys were all in a pile. Pretty beaten up by the looks of it. Hesitantly, I stood back up on my feet. Looking all around for any sign of who could have done this. Feeling slightly relieved when I found no one. Pulling my jacket closer to me and started to leave the alley. Carefully walking around the unconscious pile and giving the alley one more look over.  “Thank you,” I called softly. “Whoever you are....” 

And with that I left. A flash of a figure caught my attention at the roof of one of the buildings but I paid no mind to it. Far more concerned about getting back to my apartment before those goons woke back up or by chance more of them showed up.

[zovioliswritings]

It’s my fault, part 1

tmnt x reader

A sigh passed my lips as I took another sip of the dark color drink in my glass. The burn from the alcohol had long since dulled as it slid down my throat. Setting my drink back down on the bar, my eyes lazily fixed on on the selection of alcohol in front of me. My mind slowly beginning to feel fuzzy as my thoughts struggled to stay in control. Desperately wanting me to keep him there, not wanting me to forget about him or his brothers. 

You would think that after nearly four years that I would have moved on by now, but no. Here I am, years later, drinking myself away at a bar. Every night after work, I’d come here to try and forget. To drink their memories away, cause being forced to remember them hurt. Remembering him hurt worse, the memories of us and our dreams of the future. Gone, taken away in the blink of an eye.  

‘It should have been you..’

I closed my eyes, trying to will away the quiet thought that echoed in the back of my head. Knowing if I didn’t hush it quickly then more were to follow. 

‘Its all your fault.’

“Stop it...” I muttered softly under my breath. Resting my head into my hands, squeezing my eyes shut. Trying to force the alcohol to move faster through my system, but it wasn’t working. 

‘If only you had just done what he had said then everything would have been fine.’

“If I had done that then Mikey would be dead...” I tried to reason with the voice in my head, knowing full well that it wouldn’t get me anywhere. 

‘Excuses, that’s all you can ever come up with. You’re running from the truth, you know it was your fault. You just don’t want to accept it.’

“Okay that’s enough.” I smacked my hand onto the bar and grabbed my drink. Chugging the rest of it before getting up. Throwing a tip down and stumbling my way out the door, into the cold night. Hugging my jacket a little closer to my body as I began to make my way down the sidewalk. Not really having anywhere in mind to go. Hoping that if I walked far and fast enough, I might be able to escape my own thoughts. 

That was impossible. I knew this, but I can still wish can’t I?

I somehow ended up on the other side of the city, after god knows how long. I have lost track of time at this point. Dark clouds hid the moon, so I couldn’t even use the sky to tell what time it was.

I kept weaving though the streets, letting my body move on autopilot as I struggled with my thoughts. It wasn’t long before I arrived at a familiar destination. A small skate park with a play ground next to it. Tears welled up in my eyes as I watched scene after scene play before me. Remembering every moment we had here. It has been so long since I had last thought of this place, let alone been here.

I don’t even know why I walked here. I usually made sure to stay away from this side of town. They patrolled this side of town more often than the other. I was always so careful to stay under their radar, sticking to places I know they would never find me. So why am I being so careless now? Maybe it was because of how long its been. That maybe with the time passed, they would have forgotten about me and moved on.

A part of me didn’t care for what the reason was as my body continued to move on its own. Making my way over to the swing set, sitting down and looking over to the rest of the playground. My tears growing more before they welled over and started to stream down my face. So many memories, oh how I wished to go back in time. To relive those moments just one more time, but I can’t. Those times were long gone and I should know this by now....

I heard the thunder rumble lowly above me before I felt the rain hit my shoulders. It started off subtle, but quickly escalated to a down poor. I didn’t move though, my eyes trained on the memories in front of me. Haunting me as a small whimper escaped me. A sob gently throbbing in my throat. My heart felt like it was being torn in two and I couldn’t do anything to stop it. Sob after sob wrecking through my chest.

I was so wrapped up in myself that I hadn’t noticed the four figures walking up to me until it was too late. My heart stopping when I heard his voice, he called me name. My eyes instantly finding him. His brothers all standing behind him, all too hesitant to walk up to me. 

Him though...he stood before me, no less than a few feet. So many emotions were spread across his face. Concern, worry, surprise and relief were just a few that I was able to make out. But my thoughts were too focused on the fact that he was actually there to care much about everything else. I almost didn’t believe it. The last time I saw him, he was barely breathing. He had such a little chance of survival...yet here he was. Standing in front of me, perfectly fine.

I was so lost in just looking at him, that I almost didn’t hear him say my name again. 

“Y/N...?”

[zovioliswritings]

Soulmate AU Raphael x Reader

Au where soulmates feel each others pain after they turn 18

Warning: A little bit of swearing

also gender neutral 

“You okay Y/N?” I heard one of my friends ask, pulling me from my thoughts. 

“Yeah, you don’t look so hot. Did you not get much sleep last night?” The other asked when I didn’t respond fast enough. Earning a heavy and annoyed sigh from me.

“No...no I did not...” I grumbled out. My eyes begging me to close them as my body ached, but I had to make it though this last class first. Just 25 more minutes and I will be home, then I can finally get some much needed sleep. “You know....” I started, rubbing my face to try and stay awake.” Whoever made it the rule that you had to feel the pain of your soulmate, was an asshole or a masochist.”

This caused my two friends to burst out quietly in laughter, which in turn earned a playful glare from me.

“Screw you guys, your soulmates only pinch themselves from time to time. Mine seems to be hit by a freaking bus almost every other night.”

“We’re sorry for laughing Y/N, but we’re sure that once you meet your soulmate it will be worth it. At least it was for me.” 

I rolled my eyes,” Yeah right Jenny, whenever I meet my soulmate I’m gonna make them pay for making me stay up every night with this stupid shit.”

“Whatever you say Y/N/N.” Jenny teased before the teacher hushed us. Allowing me to return to my thoughts. My irritation spiking when my knuckles began to tingle. Feeling as if I had been punching something repeatedly, which at this moment, didn’t seem like too bad of an option if it meant that something would be my soulmate.

~~~~

Those 25 minutes ended far quicker than I thought they would, but sadly my two friends dragged me with them to study at the library. Knowing full well that I wouldn’t get any homework done if I went straight home, so I didn’t argue too much. Knocking out as much as I possible could before I just had to leave. Which I didn’t do too bad, I got quite a bit done in a couple hours and the walk back my apartment wasn’t too bad either. It was actually rather relaxing watching the city slowly wind down. The sun just about to leave the sky by the time I made it home. Tiredly making my way to the top floor, rather annoyed that our elevator wasn't working.

I dropped my book bag at the front door after I closed it. Going straight to my bedroom and flopping on my bed. Not even caring to kick off my shoes or get in more comfortable sleepwear. 

Instantly falling asleep the second my head hit the pillow. Sadly my peaceful sleep didn’t last much longer than a hour before I felt a quick and sharp pain in my arm, as if someone punched me. I let out an aggravated cry, that was it. Even though that was no where near as bad as everything else I have felt in the past few months, it was just enough to send me over the edge. I got up and went straight to my window. Opening it and taking a deep breath, letting out the biggest scream I could. 

“For the love of god, knock it of!! I just want to be able to sleep!” I know the chances of my soulmate hearing me were little to none, but I didn’t care. I was tired of hurting all the time. I was losing it, I so badly needed some decent sleep and I couldn’t take it anymore.

“Whoa, what’s got that chick so upset?” I heard a voice say from above me, somewhere on the roof of my apartment.

“Beats me,” said another, much gruffer voice. That voice sent tingles though my entire body as butterflies fluttered in my stomach. I knew exactly who that voice was, it was no doubt my soulmate. My entire being knew that and anyone else in my shoes would be ecstatic, but hearing his voice only added more fuel to the fire that was burning inside me. 

“You.....YOU MOTHERFUCKER.” I climbed out of my window and was at the edge of the roof before either of those voices could move. The second my eyes landed on them, I soon found that there were more than just two people. There were actually four, and they weren’t exactly people either. They were large bipedal turtles. Normally I would have been taken back by such a sight but the second my eyes landed on the roughest looking turtle, my pain instantly went away. The tingles flew through my veins like a wild fire as the butterflies swarmed, but that didn’t stop me from climbing onto the roof and storming up to the large turtle. 

“You...you seriously can’t give me one good nights rest can you?!” I ranted, stopping right in front of him as I jabbed my finger into his plastron. Watching as his eyes widened, completely speechless. “Do you know how many sleepless nights I had because of you?! All because you couldn’t just keep to your fucking self and not get hurt?!” I kept ranting at him, my voice raising the more I spoke. I faintly heard the other three shift around us but they didn’t intervene, not knowing what to do as they watched in bewilderment. Finally after I managed to calm down just enough to return my voice back to normal levels, I grabbed ahold of the tail ends of his red bandana, pulling him down to my level. “Now its Friday and I have a couple test coming up on Monday, I fully expect to get a good two nights of rest. I don’t wanna feel so much as a pinch come from you, you hear me?” I demanded, looking him dead in the eyes. Watching him give a gentle nod before letting him go.

“Good....” With that I turned around and left the group. Slipping back in through my window and collapsing back onto my bed. The butterflies and tingles remained and the pain slowly returned, but I was far too exhausted to care as sleep quickly took me away. More than ready for the next two nights to be the best nights of sleep I’ve had in the longest time.

[zovioliswritings]

Double Dog Dare You - Raphael x Fem Reader

(Where Y/n and April are bored and start daring one other to do things, first one to not complete a dare is the loser)

The widest smirk plastered itself on Y/N’s face as she watched April make a complete fool of herself in front of Donnie. Half surprised that April actually went through with the dare. April practically bolt out of the lab, leaving behind a blushing and confused Donnie. Poor lad was barely able to comprehend what just happened. Y/N watched April wrap a blanket around her shoulders. Covering herself to hide her sopping wet t-shirt, sending Y/N a harsh glare as she sat down on the other end of the couch. “Oh you’re so going to get it now.” April grumbled, curling her legs underneath her as she got comfortable. Y/N snickered, her smirk growing.Eyeing April, knowing there was no way April could top her dare. “Oh yeah? Whatcha gonna make me do?”  April looked away with a huff, thinking for a solid minute before a sinister smirk tugged at her lips. Her eyes returning to Y/N as her smirk grew. Y/N cocked her eyebrow, “What? What’s that look for?” “Oooohohohoh I know just how to win this,” She chuckled. “I double dog dare you...to kiss Raph.” And just like that, Y/N’s smirk disappeared. Oh how the tables have turned now. The teens face quickly turning a dark shade of red as she shook her head rapidly. “W-what?! I can’t do that!” April’s smirk grew. “Oh? So does that mean I win?~” “Wha- n-no! T-This is just so unfair!” Y/N’s face burned even more, her heart fluttering just at the thought of kissing the red clad turtle. April knew she had the biggest crush ever on the guy and now she was using it against her. “There’s no rules against it.” Y/N groan, burying her face into her hands. As much as she didn’t like the dare, the girl was a sore loser and never backed down to a challenge. “Here, I’ll even make it easy for you. You just have to kiss him on the cheek.” April reasoned. Y/N bit her bottom lip. Just a kiss on the cheek? She could handle that, that wasn’t so bad. Right? With one last groan she got up from the couch and started to make her way to the dojo, knowing Raph was more than likely going to be there. 

Poking her head inside, it didn’t take long for her to spot her turtle. He didn’t seem to notice her as he worked out on his bench. Lost in his own world as he lifted weights.

Stepping back from the door, Y/N tried to work up the courage.Shaking her arms as she bounced on her feets. Looking like she was prepping herself for some kind of fight. “Come on Y/N, you can do this. Its just one little kiss, what’s the worse that could happen? You got this.” With one last bounce she entered the dojo and headed straight for Raph, fully determined. Hearing someone enter the dojo caught Raph’s attention. His eyes instantly landing on Y/N. Sitting up as he watched her walk towards him. “Hey Y/N.” The moment his eyes met hers, she stopped dead in her tracks. Her heart racing as all her determination suddenly disappeared. “okay never mind, I can’t do this.” She instantly turned around on her heels and quickly walked out of the dojo. Leaving behind a puzzled Raph. “Y/N?” He called out to her, just about to stand up and follow her when she suddenly stormed back into the room. “Oh fucking screw it,” Marching up to him, she gently grabbed his face in her hands. Her face the same shade as his bandana as she suddenly smashed her lips against his. The kiss was rough, but it held a soft and heated passion behind it. Raph’s eyes were the size of dinner plates as his cheeks turned a darker shade of green. He didn’t even have a chance to react before Y/N pulled away and ran out of the room. Yelling something to April that he didn’t quite hear, his thoughts left in shambles as he tried to process what just happened.

[zovioliswritings]

"Hopeless, worthless, and useless...." Leo x fem reader

(HI! so this is my first fan fiction in like...years lmao. So let me know what you guys think! Also, in this Y/N has an extreme fear of confrontation due to family history, having gone behind Leo's back to train with Splinter. What will happen when she is forced to do the one thing she fears the most?)

Y/N panted heavily, hunched over with her hands on her knees. Trying to catch her breath as Master Splinter watched with a small smile.

"You are doing much better my child." He relaxed from his fighting stance and made his way over to the young woman. Resting a gentle paw on her shoulder. "Though you need to learn not to waste so much of your energy so quickly."

She let out a small groan as she straightened her posture. "How am I supposed to do that? You're so much faster than me. I have to act quickly."

This earned a small chuckle from him, letting his paw fall back to his side. "That may be true, but you could benefit from being more defensive. Something you and Raphael have in common. You should train with him, you two could help benefit one another."

With a shake of her head, she let out a defeated sigh. "As much as I'd love to do that, I can't. That would just raise the chances of Leo finding out. You know he doesn't want me to fight, Sensei."

The rat sighed, shaking his head. Knowing exactly how his eldest son would react if he found Y/N sparring with his red clad brother. "Then maybe it is time we have a talk with Leonardo. This over-protectiveness of his has become overbearing."

Y/N shook her head frantically, her heart dropping as anxiety instantly filled her soul. "N-no Sensei, you promised me you wouldn't say anything. I-its fine, I know Leo means well. He just doesn't want me to be hurt."

"This goes beyond just you getting hurt Y/N, he refuses for you to learn how to properly protect yourself." Splinters eyes narrowed, irritated with his son's decisions. "I've kept my promise in hopes you would eventually tell him, but it has been 6 months. It is only a matter of time before he finds out."

"I-I know..." Y/N whispered, twiddling with her thumbs. Unable to look up at the mutant rat. Her anxiety of eating away at her, making her wish a hole would appear under her feet and swallow her whole.

Master Splinter let out a sigh, forcing his shoulders to relax. His voice soft, but stern. "I know your fear of confronting this subject is hard on you miss Y/L/N, but this can not drag on much further. I'm giving you two days to tell my son."

Y/N's eyes widened as she snapped her gaze up to him. Her heart pounding in her chest as her lungs suddenly founding it difficult to breathe. "T...T-two....two days? M-m-master splinter I-I can't p-p-"

He rested his paw on her shoulder once again," You can and you will Y/N. It is not healthy for him to keep you from doing things and you going behind his back to do them anyway. It has to come to an end. Within these two days you will tell Leonardo.....or I will."

Y/N's breathing picked up, fighting to keep herself from having an anxiety attack. Her heart nearly stopped and leaped out of her chest when a familiar voice appeared behind the two.

"Tell me what Sensei?"

His voice, it sounded concerned. Y/N could feel his eyes on her back, but she couldn't move to face him. She was frozen, her hands trembling terribly. Her thoughts running a thousand miles a minute, completely shutting out the world around her. That is until someone gently grabbed her shoulder, forcing her to turn towards them. Her anxiety crept up from her chest to her throat, squeezing around her vocal cords. Keeping her from being able to make any kind of sound. It was like things were in slow motion. Leo was there, right in front of her. His turtle form towering over her. He looked so concerned and confused. He glanced from Master Splinter and then back to her.

His lips were moving, but she still couldn't hear anything. Only her thoughts. 'He's going to find out....he's going to be so angry with me...he's going to hate me for going behind his back....w-what...what do I do...'

Tears started to blur her vision, with the last bit of control she had, she ripped herself away from Leo and ran. Running faster than she ever had before. She was out of the lair and deep within the sewers before anyone could even say something. By the time she got to the surface her breathes were coming out labored, barely able to keep herself up right as she leaned against a building. Trying to desperately catch her breath while looking around, trying to figure out where she was. Tears streaming down her face when she spotted her apartment building across the street. Within a minute she was in her apartment, slamming the door behind her. Quickly locking it before going to every window and locking them.

When she was done, she finally collapsed onto her couch. Her lungs gasping for air as her body screamed in pain. Having been pushed past it's limits and then some. She buried her face into a pillow, struggling to calm herself down. Her cries coming out in broken sobs and pants. Everything hurt, both physically and mentally. It didn't take to long before she fell unconscious due to exhaustion and over exertion. Leaving her mind a slave to itself.  

~

By the time Y/N woke up the next day, it was already 2:30 in the afternoon. She could barely move, her body still completely worn by last nights events. She laid there on the couch for a few hours before her stomach forced her to get up and feed it. Though nothing sounded good. Even though she was hungry, she had lost all appetite to eat anything. After a while, she just forced herself to eat a bowel of cereal before returning to the couch. Turning on the TV, using it more for background noise than actually watching it as she was pulled back into her thoughts.

She stayed there the rest of the day. Hiding under her blanket whenever she heard Casey or April at the front door Ignoring them no matter what they said, even putting a book shelf against the door when Casey threatened to bust down the door.

As the sun started to go down, her anxiety started to settle in again. She knew Leo would be coming over. It was only just a matter of when. Her window was all she had to keep him out, and that wouldn't stand a chance against him if he really wanted to get in. Y/N knew this wouldn't last long, tomorrow Leo would know. Whether she liked it or not. But if she could hold out on the confrontation until tomorrow, then she damn sure was going to waste every minute she could.

The second the sun was no longer visible in the sky, there was a tapping on her window.  This caused her heart rate to spike as she buried herself deeper into her blankets. Snuggling further into the couch. Trying to make herself as small as possible. She could faintly hear her name being called out.

'It's him....he's here...' Anxiety swelled into her stomach once more as she tried to ignore his constant tapping. After a while it suddenly stopped and it was quiet for about ten minutes. Hesitantly, she untangled herself from her blanket and slowly lifted herself off her couch. Tip toeing to her room and over to the window. Peaking outside, looking for any sign of her beloved turtle. After about five minutes, she let out a sigh of relief. Relaxing as she unlocked her window and opened it. Taking in a breath of fresh air. Crossing her arms as she leaned against the window seal and closed her eyes. Letting the night breeze calm her down further.

"...Y/N..."

Her eyes snapped open at the sound of her name, jumping back when she found Leo standing right in front of her. His face having been just inches from hers. Her breath picked up as she backed further into the room. Watching as he entered the room. His movements slow and gentle.

"Y/N wait...it's okay, I just want to know what's wrong." He spoke so softly, taking a step towards her.

She shook her head and took another step back. Looking down as she felt her back meet one of the walls in her room. Her heart racing.

Leo frowned as he watched her, taking careful steps towards her. He hated seeing her like this, and he didn't understand why. Why was she acting so afraid of him? "Y/N its okay, please down be afraid. I'm not going to hurt you. I just want to know what's wrong.." He stopped once he was right in front of her, his body towering over her. Placing a gentle hand on her arm, frowning even more when she flinched under his touch. "Y/n please....its okay love...You can tell me, I'm not gonna be upset."

"B-but you are..." She choked out with a sob, tears flowing down her cheeks. "Y-You're g-g-gonna b-be so mad a-and hate m-me." She buried her face into her hands as she sobbed. Crying even harder when Leo pulled her into his arms.

"Love no, I could never ever be mad at you. Let alone hate you." He gently picked her up and carried her over to the bed. Sitting down and setting her on his lap as he comforted her. Gently rubbing her back as she cried into his plastron. Slowly getting her to calm down.

She sniffled as she stared at his neck, lightly tracing random shapes on his plastron. Unable to look him in the eye.

"Y/N....could you please tell me what this is all about.." He felt her tense up in his arms once again. "Its okay Y/N...I'm not going to be mad.." He gently kissed the apex of her head.

They both sat in silence for a few minutes before Y/N worked up the courage to speak. "I...I-I..." Leo didn't say anything, he just rubbed her back. Encouraging her to continue. "I went behind your back....a-and have been training with Master Splinter..."

Leo's eyes widened, most defiantly having not expected that. "What?"

Y/N whimpered and buried herself further into the turtle. "I-I k-know you said you d-didn't want me to start any serious training b-b-but..." Her voice closed off as tears started to well up in her eyes once again.

"But what love..?" He cooed softly in her ear. No trace of anger or betrayal was found in his voice. It gave her to courage to continue.

"B-but I c-couldn't just be satisfied with the basic training you taught me. It was all just simple techniques to be able to slip away and run...and...it wasn't enough." Y/N pulled away just enough to look up at him. "Yeah, those techniques worked whenever we were in a pinch but...having to leave you guys behind to fight the fight...." Her gaze dropped back down to his plastron, letting everything that she felt out. "Hopeless, worthless, and useless...the list can go on and on with how it made me feel. To know that I couldn't do anything more and that that's all you thought I would ever be capable of doing."

Leo's heart dropped as he looked down at her. How could he have done this, he had only meant to protect her from harm. But here he was, hurting her so much that she feared to tell him about something so small. He pulled her closer into his arms, nuzzling his face into her hair. "I'm so sorry, Y/N. I'm so, so sorry.  You are capable of so much more than that. I never meant to make you feel that way." He gently kissed the top of her head once more. "I just....was afraid that once your started to learn how to fight, then it meant you were now really apart of everything that I want to protect you from."

"But I'm already apart of it Leo," She said softly, wrapping her arms around his neck. "The moment I meet you guys, I became apart of your life. Whether I know how to fight or not."

He sighed softly, "I know....I just... "

Y/N nuzzled his cheek, "I know...."

They sat in silence for a while, just holding one another. Both lost in their own thoughts,

"If you'd like..." Leo said, breaking the silence.

"Hm?" She replied, pulling away enough to look up at him. Finally being able to meet his gaze without fear.

"I can help and train with you....I know how tough Master Splinter can be." He gave a gentle smile, resting his forehead on hers.

A smile pulled at her lips. "I'd really like that...and Leo?"

"Yeah?"

"I love you..."

His smile grew, " I love you too."

[zovioliswritings]

Hello!

It’s been forever since I’ve last has the chance to really sit down and write. I miss it and thought I’d give it a shot.