forrestfaery

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*The Secret History*

hey!! I hope you all are doing well, I recently started The secret history and i really like it so far!! I got some new tabs and TRANSPARENT STICKY NOTES which i couldn’t get a good picture of. but i’m so excited! i’ll be sharing more stuff i’m reading and studying/homework soon! as you can see I am also reading The Great Gatsby for English. I’ll go more in depth into that book soon because i’m getting close to the end!

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Breezeh aka Briscoe Park (American, b. Cary, NC, USA) - Photos I took at 3am, 2021, Photography

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the painted hall in old royal naval college, london

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“Books are not made to be believed, but to be subjected to inquiry. When we consider a book, we mustn’t ask ourselves what it says but what it means.”

— Umberto Eco (b. 5 January 1932)

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hello mon amours!

As you can tell from this blog, I really love all forms of art. Photography is one of those I hold dear to my heart. With that, i’ve started to get more into it recently and I have an instagram for it!

avashoots ON INSTA

It would mean the absolute world to me if you would follow and like some of my posts. I’m currently in the process of trying to build my name up, so that would help immensely. I’ve added pictures of some of my photography just so y’all can get a glimpse into it. I love you all dearly and thank you so much if you decide to follow <3

[forrestfaery]

Evil wins again

Tears shatter on marble floors

Even the angels wept

As God descends from the throne

The devil rises to take seat.

Conquest of the Holy Kingdom

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Even

a monster

has dreams

-a.m.

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symptoms of depression: part one

My body

becomes one

with the bed

organs rot

in the ocean colored sheets

screaming for help,

yet sound is drowned out

by the infinite feathers

of the cold pillows

blankets tug

on my pale skin

acting as chains

and i am unable to escape

a hell

i have come to know

so well

i want to leave

but my mangled mind

refuses to let

my tangled limbs

roam

-a.m.

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But as idealist as he was,

the hero was ashamed with the world often.

-a.m.

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“O goddess, sing tonight not of the failures of men nor of the hubris of icarus, or of his scornful laugh & smile (instead, sing of the gentle gasp he let out before breaking the surface of the sea) & do not speak of the wax that burned his back & shoulders in retribution for his pride (speak instead of his grubby hands reaching out to catch the feathers floating past his face) O goddess, sing tonight not of the failures of men, but of the humanity they possess that always comes just before the fall”

— even the gods are not invincible | @alovetoread16

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Fate

The Fates spun my string

From the wool of a murdered lamb,

They doused it in poison

And gave me no chance

The fates sang,

“Suffer shall be the middle name

of the child who must bear the life of this string.”

They cast a curse

With every ounce of

What one could call…

Their heart

The fates brewed a potion

Of hurricanes and tidal waves

Then they dumped it all on my string

They made up a little game,

How much pain could I take

Until I was making my way

Straight to Hades’ gates

Could I be the next Atlas

And hold the weight of the world

Or will I, like Icarus

Fall, for I was too close to the sun

To play the game

They burned all of the trees

Around me

Then they, let me climb a mountain

Only to see that I had fifty-four more

Planted right in front of me

The fates sang,

“Every road this child shall walk,

Must have twists and turns,

Oh! Of a lot.”

The fates made sure

Every step of my feet

The ground will crumble behind me

And if I were to fall through a crack

My journey will start

Right back at the beginning

The fates made my path

Of tears, sorrow, and sadness

Because hey,

Struggle is my middle name

They painted my string with hope

But what I didn’t know was

Hope looked me straight in the eye

And spoke nothing but lies

I don’t think you realize how hard it is

To walk out of Tartarus with scratches and scars

And have the courage

To do it again

The very next day

My mind is a complicated maze

And when I think I’ve reached the end

I see there is another beast

That I have to defeat

The fates made Cerberus appear right in front of me

With all his teeth bared

six red eyes stalking me

Following me every road I walk

Trust me I didn’t choose to live life this way

I’m lethargic and bruised by the end of it all

The fates made a cursed string

and bestowed it upon me.

this is a poem i made awhile ago and i wanted to post it on here, can y’all give me some feedback on it : )

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deep • feelings

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and here you are, continuing on, despite how hard it’s been

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y o this is hella important

the one problem i have with people my age and younger is that a lot of us do not have hands on hobbies. like i have spoken to so many people my age who go to work, go to school and then fuck around on their phone/computer for hours and then ???????? like no wonder ur depressed and have low confidence in urself. u need to get ur hands on something, feed those dopamine receptors! learn how to play guitar, garden, scrapbook, fucking make model trains. i don’t give a shit, MAKE SOMETHING!!

it feels better than drugs when i finish making a thing—and then show it off or gift it.

and then so people my age say to me ‘well—i can’t draw/paint/knit/etc. like you can. my stuff would be terrible.’ yeah, well duh—a part of developing skill is sucking at something and then practicing it over and over and over again until you suck less. u’ll have a hard time feeling lonely or bored when you can’t stop thinking abt a technique you want to try or something you want to make for someone else. making things has SAVED MY LIFE. it gave me a reason to keep living day after day when i wanted to die.

making things have improved my generational relationships (when i worked for the newspaper i would talk to customers abt jamming recipes or cross-stitch, one of my grandmas always gives me pattern books and tell me abt when she knitted things for mom, my other grandma is giving me a wedding quilt that HER grandma gave her 50 years ago because she knows i will appreciate it). it also got me likeminded friends who also make things.

take a ceramics class! pick up water colors, bake cakes! learn to work on cars! make soap. DO SOMETHING THAT DOESN’T INVOLVE STARING AT A SCREEN.

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(1) wish in life: have an unlimited budget at barnes and noble (without spending m y money)

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just to remember this for the new year 

A Stash of Tiny Study Tips

STAYING MOTIVATED

Create realistic goals: get ___ grade on next ____

Manageable let down; get back on track

Keep track of grades: focused, know where stand, no surprises

Start small

Low risk confidence builders

Take time to relax/give self rewards

Days off, breaks, rewards

All work & no play =/= living

Little organization goes a long way

Reward achievements!

Keep balance with exercise, clubs, friends

2h/d: friends and exercise

Remember that hard work pays off

Isn’t a breeze to try to get a 4.0 GPA; but it’s possible

You’re smart enough and can achieve it

90% there with these tips, 10% is just pure hard work

Only chill on weekends

Monday-Friday: school mode

Have time for some fun

If work as hard as should during week, will need weekends to blow off steam

Be self-motivated

Grades can matter, not everything, but follow through on what needs to be done

Not most important part of college but underperform? You will regret it

GPA cutoffs exist and matter to employers

College is full of distractions and opportunities

Nobody will hold hand and the work will suck but all the prouder of yourself to be

Suck it up, buckle down, get it done

If think need break, probably don’t

Turn off the little voice

Realize not alone in questioning ability

Avoid people who tend to burst bubbles no matter what 

Physical triggers to stop

Incentive to get something done when know have something else during the day

Don’t have a gaping abyss of study time

Work has to get done, in the end

Books, examiners, and especially your future self isn’t going to care about your excuses for not doing the work

Take the first step

It will almost be fictional how hard you thought the task was going to be

Just keep going because you simply can’t afford NOT to do anything today, nonzero days

Leeway, don’t give your perfectionism control over your life

MUNDANE HABITS

Sleep! Think and function, mind & body

CAN sleep if keep up with coursework instead of procrastinating

Will miss out on some fun stuff

Need to stay awake in class

Figure out what need for full speed

Stay relaxed

Stay physically healthy

Diet and exercise

1 hour exercise during week

Weekends off

Traditional breakfast not necessary if value extra sleep

Systematic habits: neat, prepared

Master material

Look for real world applications

Learning is a process: be patient, don’t expect to master off the bat

Designate study area and study times

Do trial runs

Practice tests

Ask a TA to listen to your oral performance

Study groups

Don’t copy other people’s psets and solutions

BEFORE SEMESTER

Spiral bound notebook, can color code with folders/etc if need be

Lecture notes: front to back

Reading notes: back to front (if fall behind on)

Seminar notes: mixed in with lecture notes, different pen color/labeled

Outline format

Bullet points for everything

Same NB for one set of class notes, separate notebooks for all classes

5-subject notebook

Midterm and exam material in it

Mesh sources, study guide

All study material from week/month in one place

Pick the right major

Indulge in favorite hobby feeling

Pick professors & classes wisely

Take a small class

Pick classes that interest you so studying doesn’t feel torturous

Want to learn

GRADES SPECIFIC

Prioritize class by how can affect GPA

More credits: more weight

Work enough to get an A in your easy classes: take something good at

Don’t settle, don’t slack off, don’t put in minimal effort to get that B/C. Just put in a tiny bit more effort to ensure A

Will have harder classes and need to counteract

Take electives can ace

Anything but an A in an elective is kinda mean and an unnecessary hit for your GPA

FIRST DAY/WEEK/HALF OF CLASSES

Get to know teaching style: focus most on, lecture/notes

Pick and follow a specific note taking format

Outline

Date each entry

Capture everything on board

Decide productivity system

Google Cal

Todoist

Agenda: remind meetings, class schedule, important dates/midterms/quizzes/tests, no homework 

Always wanted to be prepared

Rarely last minute

Have plan, stay focused

Homework notebook

Good redundancy

Study syllabus

Know it thoroughly

Plot all due dates after class

Penalize if fail to abide by

Study the hardest for the first exam

Seems counterintuitive

Hardest/most important test

Pay attention to content and formatLess pressure: just need ___ on final to keep my A 

Easy to start high and keep high

Go into crunch mode at the beginning

End softly

Get plenty of sleep, exercise, and good food in the finals days before the exam

DURING SEMESTER: PEOPLE

Get to know professors: go to office hours, care about grades/course/them

Easier ask for help, rec letter

Get to know interests and what they think is important

Figure out their research interests, 60% of their job is research

Learning is dynamic

Discussion helps

Get feedback early when not sure what doing

Take comments constructively

Consistent class participation: ask questions, give answers, comment when appropriate

Understand material

Find a study buddy in each class: don’t have to study with

Somebody can compare notes with, safety net

Pick somebody who attends, participates, and take notes regularly

Make some friends

Participate as fully as can in group activities

Be involved

Learn – not be taught

Be punctual

Good impression, on human professors

DON’T BE LATE

Skipping class =/= option: It’s “cool” to get attendance award

Make all the classes: it’s hard to feel confident when missing key pieces

Get full scope of class, everything will make a lot more sense and save a lot of time in long run

Mandatory class: higher graduating cumulative GPA

Go to class when no one else does/want to show up, reward

Get to know professor, what’s on test, notice, r/s build, material not in reading

Unless optional and super confusing professor

Sit in one of the first rows

Don’t fall asleep

Fake interest if you have to

Tutors

DURING SEMESTER: THINGS TO DO

Take notes! Provided is bare minimum, accessed by students who aren’t attending lecture

Based on lecture and what read –> test; it’ll be worth it

Write it down

By hand

Bored? Doodle instead of going online

Read all assigned–even if need to skim

Seems cumbersome and maybe impossible

Figure out what’s important

Look at the logical progression of the argument/what’s important/what trying to prove

Understand everything that you do read–even if don’t read everything

PIck 2 examples from text per topic

Complete course material on time

DO NOT WAIT UNTIL DAY BEFORE IT IS DUE

Begin as soon as possible

Sometimes it’s just straight up impossible

Have it look attractive

Library doesn’t just mean = study

Social media in the library is still social media

Confusion is terrible

Read other textbooks, review course material @ another uni/by another professor, google the shit out of it

Review

Do not wait, do throughout semester

Exam prep

Ask for model papers, look at style & structure, thesis, how cite

Get old tests

Look at type of questions (detail level and structure)

Can solve old exams cold

If give out paper exams in class: probs won’t repeat questions, focus more on concepts but still learn the questions

Have class notes and psets down cold

Do all the practice problems

Read through notes a few times; rewrite into a revision notebook

Highlight major topics and subtopics

Different highlighter for vocab terms

Overall picture, go from concept to detail

Look at overall context and how specific idea fit into whole course

Ideas, don’t memorize all your notes

Better understand = more able to use and manipulate info and remember it. Understand = manipulation.

Charts, diagrams, graphs

Lists

Practice drawing labeled structures

Flash cards for memorization

Every school requires some degree of grunt memorization

Say it aloud, write it down

Get friends to quiz you

Self-test: severely challenge self, have a running collection of exam questions

Explain difficult concepts to your friends; force yourself to articulate the concept

Never pull an all-nighter

Do not spend every hour studying up to the exam

Eat, shower, sleep

Don’t wait until night before exam to study

Prep takes time even if reviewed throughout semester

Ask about format–don’t ask the professor to change it for you

Law of College: it will be on the exam if you don’t understand it

Ask professor, internet, textbooks

Night before exam

Jot what want to remember/have fresh

Read through in morning/before exam

Physical prep

Sleep, have test materials

Day of exam

Don’t cram every single spare minute

Go to bathroom before exam

Never miss an exam/lie to get more time

You won’t be any more ready 2-3 days after when supposed to have taken it

Slay exam. Get A. 

WEEKLY 

Friday morning: go through each syllabus, write down in HW notebook

All hw during weekend; study/reading assignments during week

Save everything

Divide big tasks into small pieces to help propel self

Standard study schedule: block off lectures, labs, regular commitments

Note the weeks that have assignments and tests that will require extra studying

Don’t oscillate too heavily every day with study times (i.e. don’t study 2-3 hours for weeks and then 10-12 hour days right before an exam)

Eat and sleep to make more extended work periods liveable and enjoyable

DAILY

Set an amount of time would like to study every day

Try to study most days

Avoid vague/zoned out studying –> waste of time

Do a little bit daily but don’t let studying be your whole day

Review notes: 30mins/day, each class from that day

Look at important ideas/vocab

Prioritize new vocab because language is most fundamental and important tool in any subject

Circle abbreviations and make yourself a key somewhere so you don’t forget what the hell that abbreviations meant

Check spelling

Rewrite/reorganize notes if necessary

Format of ideas is just as important as the concepts themselves, esp. when it comes time for exam review

This helps you retain the material so you’ll be ahead next time you walk into class

Chance to ID any knowledge gaps that you can ask about for next class

Keep up with reading

Skim text before lecture or at least main topic sentences

Jot down anything don’t understand; if lecture doesn’t clarify, ask the professor

After lecture: skim again, outline chapter, make vocab flashcards

Highlight similar class and lecture notes

will definitely be tested on

Review and make study questions

Study

Disconnect from anything irrelevant to study material: help focus and your GPA

Don’t limit studying to the night

Study whenever, wherever between classes

Variety helps focus and motivation

Especially if tired at night and can’t transition between subjects

Try to study for a specific subject right before/after the class