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"I sort fics by kudos and only kudos on stories with high kudos counts, why aren't there more stories with high kudos, I ran out of things to read." You're part of the problem.

"Authors artificially inflate comment counts by thanking people, I can't find anything with a real comment count to read." No they fucking are not, they're grateful for engagement.

"I can't read anything under 100k." That's the majority of fics you're ignoring, most novels aren't even that long.

"I don't have time to look for the incredibly rare diamond in the rough, so I won't read anything below a certain amount of kudos, comments, and hits." Those fics are popular because people gave them a chance and then snobs like you found them.

"I won't read anthing with a single typos." You made typos in that sentence, get off your high horse.

"One singular author didn't thank me for commenting, I'm never commenting on any fic again so I don't get burned." You're punishing people because someone didn't give you engagement they don't owe you that they might not have seen.

"This fic is three months old, it's so old, it doesn't matter if I comment or kudos, it's old." Fics do not have expiration dates, comment and kudos.

You're killing your fandoms with your snobbish behaviors.

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i know it's plot armour, so let's just breeze past that, but;

it was essential that the rest of the jedi were eradicated at the same time anakin fell, and vader rose. because otherwise, there would have been no way that anakin could have just disappeared off the radar of the universe without an absolute uproar, from all sides.

because imagine if the jedi purge didnt happen as completely as it did, if there were still enough jedi around to survive, testify, and keep records. anakin's “vanishing act” would be unignorable.

the republic's darling war hero just… gone. the hero with no fear. posters everywhere, adored in the outer rim for liberating worlds, known in the core as the youngest and most reckless jedi knight. and suddenly - nothing.

the propaganda machine would eat it up. either the jedi or the empire would have to spin it: “skywalker died heroically in the defense of the republic.” or, “the treacherous jedi murdered their most promising knight.” either way, he’s mythologized instantly.

conspiracy theories would go wild. did the jedi hide him? did he fake his death? was he too dangerous, too powerful, too un-jedi, and so they got rid of him? is he still out there, waiting?

the street art, shrines, the protests, the inquiries; especially in slave-heavy systems like tatooine or outer rim worlds that knew him as their liberator. “anakin lives.” murals of his podracer and jedi robes. kids pretending to be him in back alleys.

tabloids + holonews, “who was anakin skywalker, really?” “the padawan who died too young.” “did he leave behind a secret family?” (and imagine the gut-punch irony of those rumors being true with padmé).

and like, palpatine wouldn’t even need to squash this mythology. he could encourage it. let the galaxy mourn its “fallen hero.” let them keep the image of anakin skywalker in their hearts as the jedi who might have saved them if only the jedi weren’t traitors.

but, would people put together that at the same time, this dangerous, vicious, cold-hearted and spiteful sith-lord was able to rise up and be the right-hand man for the emperor? surely not, not their golden boy, their smiling, loyal and brave anakin skywalker, right?

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my starlight

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I have no words

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It would be so funny if Padmé takes one look at these horrendous outfits of the clones (and her fashion-ignorant husband) and says "absolutely not" and helps them to dress nice, practical and comfy. And I just know she would start with the 501st

Everytime i read an AU where the war ends and the clones get rights and everything i cant help but wonder how they would dress.

You have these guys who have literally NEVER had to dress themselves. There were always uniforms and they have primarily been around clones and jedi and then the war is over and they just have to start?? Wearing normal clothes??

I feel like this scenario would end in some of the most horrendous outfits the galaxy has ever seen. Just millions of very very badly dressed men.

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In my head, people dress like this in the upper classes on Naboo (although I still imagine a somewhat flashy fashion for the poor, just less elaborate. Padmé's mother is probably middle class and wore puff sleeves on her dress).

Padmé's looks are iconic and even Palpatine dresses in a very characteristic way, I would be disappointed if the rest of the planet dressed in a boring way.

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Another contrast that exists in Anakin's characterisation.

He is a larger than life character with a half-force lineage. Every narrative shift of his impacts the galaxy at large. But it was individuals who made up his journey. The status of chosen one never got to him and by and large, became a reluctant responsibility to him.

Jedi's corruption, Republic's apathy, Palpatine's manipulations - they were all never going to be enough to cause his fall. Two ideologies (Jedi & Sith) remained wrestling over him yet he tied his destiny to an individual. Ideology never drove his heart. People did. (sure, there were big accompanying factors involved but none of them were the driving force).

Padme was his fulcrum when he was the galaxy's fulcrum. Luke was his redemption when he was the galaxy's redemption. He was a force both powerful enough to change fates at a galactic scale and delicate enough to hinge on an individual's fate.

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Prompt: AU where Padme is the Sith empress and Anakin is the senator.

This one hoppedoff in a direction I wasn’t expecting, but… well.  I think you’ll like it.

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Padmé Amidala,Lady Noxia of the Sith, sighed at the Senator from Tatooine, Anakin Skywalker.

Of course, she wasstudying him through the hidden holocam in his office, so he didn’t know shewas watching him.  Noxia had inheritedthe Empire from her adoptive father, Lord Sidious, after he had died in thatsuspicious Rebel attack, and she was now planning on finding her own heir.

She was determinedthat her heir would be her true child, and she wanted Senator Skywalker to bethe father. 

She had felt hisimmense, if untrained, strength in the Force, and knew any child of his wouldbe the greatest Sith in the galaxy.

The problem wasthat Skywalker was opposed to many of the policies of the Empire.  He was vehemently anti-slavery, and Sidioushad loved to use slave labor.

Noxia was changingthings.  It was taking time, but shehoped Skywalker noticed soon.

She had just thrownher weight behind a bill in the Senate outlawing slave labor.

Noxia watched asSkywalker pulled up the information on that bill.  He was smiling grimly as he made notes on thenearby pad.  Noxian angled the cam to geta glimpse, and Skywalker was jotting down some ideas for increased punishmentsfor slavers.

Oh, she liked theone for three or more infractions, or three or more slaves.

Perhaps sheshould, in addition to wooing him into becoming her consort, train him, atleast enough so he could protect their future child.  He had a sharp mind, and a vengeful streakthat made her envious.

Noxia smiled evenas Anakin’s brother, Ben Kenobi, entered the room.

Ben confusedher.  She’d gotten discrete confirmationthat the men weren’t actually brothers by blood or name, but they called eachother that, and they definitely acted like brothers.  There was some obscure, perhaps secretive,culture on Tatooine, and they were apparently brothers by the customs of thatculture.

And yet… there wassomething more to them than that.  What,Noxia didn’t know, but she would figure it out.

After all, sincethey were brothers somehow, Ben would become part of the royal family when sheand Anakin wed.

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Obi-Wan “Ben”Kenobi smiled at Anakin as he pulled his own pad out.  “It was the Empress, Anakin,” he saidquietly.

Anakin nodded ashe looked up.  “So why?  I know she’s been changing things since thecoronation, but this is even beyond what anyone thought she’d do.”

“She knows youhate slavery with a passion.”

Anakin narrowedhis eyes.  “Not this again.  I’m just one of thousands of senators,nothing she should be interested in.”

Ben narrowed hiseyes in return.  He knew Empress Amidalawanted Anakin, either as a lover, as an apprentice, or as a consort.  Or perhaps all three.

Anakin, however,was sure she didn’t care who he was, or his Force strength.

They were taking arisk, living here, in the heart of the Sith Empire, but they were Jedi, andthis was the best way to serve the people of the galaxy.

“But if she is…”

Anakinshrugged.  “If she is, she’s theEmpress.  It’s not like I can feasiblysay no.”

“The fact thatshe’s doing this suggests that she wants you to be…” Ben paused.  “Content, perhaps?”

Anakin looked tothe side.  “I know.  If what you suggest is true.”

Ben looked at theman he had raised and trained.  “Anakin,little brother.  If it’s true, you havechoices.”

“Not if I want toserve the people,” Anakin said.

Ben sighed andleaned forward.  Anakin was right, ofcourse, but Ben worried.  He’d alwaysworry.

“I’ll survive,Ben,” Anakin said.  “No matter whathappens.”

Ben nodded.  His little brother would certainlysurvive.  And perhaps, once they wereaway from surveillance, he and Anakin could plan a way to change the Empirefrom within, from the highest levels. Because if Ben was right, Anakin would become one of the most powerfulbeings in the galaxy and would have the Empress’ ear.

And yet, Ben hopedhe was wrong.  He wanted Anakin, if heever chose to marry, to do so for love, not because it was good for the galaxy,or to save someone else from the Sith.

Ben shook his headand focused on the anti-slavery bill for now. Later, that could come later.  Hisown teacher had taught him to focus on the moment, and he would do that fornow.

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Jedi inhiding!  I didn’t expect that when Istarted this one.  I do so  like how Obi-Wan has a ready-made alternateidentity, though.

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@paulinaklime Rumi 💜

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A reminder that you can always reject canon if it sucks and write your own fix-it fics

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Obi-Wan "cant sit normal" Kenobi

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Honestly I'm surprised they never did the "Naboo queen switch" thing in the Clone Wars show to exploit the fact that clone troopers must have incredibly weird facial recognition skills. This is a group of men who have lived most of their lives surrounded by people who have the same faces as they do, they are simultaneously face blind and extremely attentive to very minor differences.

"Ma'am, with all due respect, we need to put you in the safe house."

"For future reference, how did you know who I was?"

"Left ear sticks out more." "Now that you mention it, your right eye has less eyebag..." "When you turn your neck the upper tendons...."

"Never mind."

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he's so boy next door <3

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Obi Wan: Anakin, I got you a padawan. Anakin: What the fuck were you thinking?! Obi Wan: She need someone to teach her responsibility. Anakin: Right, so what the fuck were you thinking?!

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Leia: Luke, you are my brother which entitles you to my bone marrow and one of my kidneys, but this is an imposition!

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